MythMaker258 has made a DBS reacts to DBZ Abridged fic, and it's AMAZING! So, go give it some love!
It was the day after the party, and things were calm again. Bulma was busy working on the Bat-Sayian suit and outfitting some of it with tech from Samus' suit. Things had been calm at Goku's farm, until Roshi had dropped something off, calming it came from that 'Battle Box' thing the Blackthorns left. It was a small white-and-red ball, and while Chi-Chi recognized what it was, she was concerned with what might be inside.
"So, what's the problem Chi-Chi?" Goku asked.
"I… I dunno." She frowned. "It might be harmless, or It might be something terrible. Skorch left it for me specifically, and… I don't know if I trust him."
"Eh, only one way to find out!" Goku exclaimed, suddenly throwing the ball (to Chi-Chi's annoyance) and a bright flash of white light, a small pokémon stood before them and looked up at her.
"Squirtle?"
"Aw, hey little guy!" Goku said with a wave.
"Squirtle!"
"It… aw, it is kinda cute." Chi-Chi smiled, patting its head. "Do you think it's here to help water the crops?"
Without warning, Squirtle waddled off, and then began doing laps throughout the turnip fields, watering the fields with its water gun.
"Great! That takes care of that job! Bye!" Goku exclaimed before teleporting out of there.
"Yeah, I guess- HEY!"
Re-appearing at Kame house, Goku looked around, trying to find someone to train with, only to find Roshi sleeping, Turtle slowly moving across the beach… and that was it.
"Hmm…" He frowned, flying off towards Capsule Corp. HQ, deciding to see if Vegeta was around. Landing, he did find Vegeta, but he was in the middle of helping Bulma altering a black-and-blue robot. Wait, no, that wasn't a robot. That was the armor-thing she had been working on.
"Hey!" He waved as he landed. "How's the Bat-thing goin'?"
"Good, I think." Bulma remarked, setting down one of her tools. "The armor's strong, but it got broken by one of Vegeta's Gallick blasts. If I change it so it could be resistant, whoever's wearing it loses a lot of mobility…"
"Eh, I still don't see what good armor would do us in the first place." Goku shrugged.
"It's not for us, Kakarot. It's for her, and anyone who would fight alongside us but doesn't have the powers we have."
"So, pretty much everyone but you, me, Gohan, Goten, and Trunks?"
"Yeah, pretty much. Krillin, the Namekian, Triclops, hell, even Yamcha would benefit from this."
"Ugh! Where's that book Skorch sent us?!" Bulma groaned as the right arm seemed to suddenly weigh a ton, and dropped to the floor with a 'CLANG!'
"No idea, you were the one who took the one on the Batsuit." Vegeta replied with a shrug.
"Hey, if you're looking for that bat-armor-thing, why not just re-watch the Death Battle episode with Batman?" Goku asked.
"…that's not a bad idea." Bulma blinked, turning and leaving the lab.
"Wanna train?" Goku asked looking to Vegeta.
"Bulma needs me… for some reason… we'll train after the episode." Vegeta replied, knowing there wasn't any arguing with his wife. Goten and Trunks had been working on some school work for one of their classes later in the day, but took the opportunity to knock off and watch another Death Battle. Piccolo had been by to drop something off, and had agreed to stay as well, even if it was just out of boredom (and re-watching a battle).
(*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*)
"Defending the weak from powerful agents of evil demands a champion who has achieved the peak of human capability, reached and broken the limits of strength and resilience, all in the name of justice. And sometimes… vengeance."
"I don't remember Batman's Death Battle starting like this." Goku blinked.
"I'm surprised you remember it at all…" Vegeta muttered.
"And these two are some of the greatest champions of those realms! Batman, The Dark Knight."
"Oh hey, Batman's back!"
"And Captain America, The Sentinel of Liberty." Wiz added as a man in red and blue stood before them, holding a shield which had a star in the center, and a red ring around the outside.
"Huh, never thought they'd do a rematch." Piccolo commented.
"Eh, I'm good with it. I really wanna see more of what Batman can do!" Goten exclaimed, and there was general agreement on that regard.
"He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick."
"And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle!"
Batman
(*Cues: Batman Begins - Molossus*)
"Throughout the underworld of Gotham City, and comic readers everywhere, one name strikes fear in the cold, black hearts of even the most hardened criminals: The Batman."
"But becoming a six-foot flying Rat of Vengeance comes at a cost, for eight-year-old Bruce Wayne, it was helplessly watching as his parents were gunned down in front of him on the way back from the Theatre. That poor kid... that Opera really must have scarred him."
"Not as much as the bullets, but whatever…" Trunks muttered, and Vegeta stifled a snort at the off-hand remark.
BACKGROUND
- Age: 41
- Height: 6'1" / 1.9 Meters
- Weight: 210 Lbs. / 95.3 kg
- Alias': The Dark Knight, Shadow Of The Bat, The World's Greatest Detective, The Saviour Of Gotham
- Secret Identity: Bruce Wayne
- Net Worth: $6.9 Billion
- Perfected Every Martial Art Known To Man (That impressed Goku)
- 12 Master's Degrees, Making Him One Of The Smartest Men Alive (That impressed Bulma greatly)
"Yup, seen this." Vegeta muttered.
"Bruce's genius-level intellect and physical prowess allowed him to pick up a vast array of skills on his global journey to become The Dark Knight. He became an expert in the art of disguise and a master of every fighting style known to man. He's perfected escape artistry, sword fighting, detective skills, stealth, has a photographic memory, earned 12 master degrees, an expert marksman despite refusing to use guns, and is vastly knowledgeable in pressure point combat."
"And we're positive he's not superhuman?" Boomstick asked, somewhat sarcastically, somewhat seriously.
"I'm with Boomstick on that one; how is Batman NOT superhuman? After everything he's done…"
"They said he's mortal, though."
"Sure, but…"
"Officially, no he's not." Wiz shook his head. "But he's the pretty much a supernatural threat, as he has learned to appear so in the minds of his opponents."
(*Cues: Main Title - Batman: The Animated Series*)
"Batman's stealth comes from his training, and having been trained by legendary The League of Assassins, Batman's greatest weapon is fear." Wiz continued with his explanation as Bruce Wayne was seen fighting three, asked figures with a Bo staff while standing on what looked like several thick bamboo stumps.
"All it takes is a glimpse of that pointy-eared shadow and criminals start shaking in their boots. Batman can disappear and reappear in an instant, thanks to his mastery of stealth and ninjutsu mobility, and the high-tech gadgets he keeps in his Utility Belt. We've been through this before, but just to recap, we're talking gear like his Batclaw grappling hook, strong enough to hold several smoke pellets, tons of different Batarangs, and... shock gloves. Thunder fingers!"
UTILITY BELT
- Batclaw
- Smoke Pellets
- Various Batarangs
- Explosive Gel
- Disruptor
- Shock Gloves ("Those'd be cool to have!" Goten said.)
- Cryptographic Sequencer ("What?" Was asked by a few.)
- Forensic Analysis Kit
- First Aid Kit
- Line Launcher
"Hey. Don't underestimate the shock gloves." Wiz remarked. "They release a charge powerful enough to penetrate Kevlar body armor, which is bulletproof, and can even stop the heart of one of Batman's most powerful enemies, Bane."
"But then he restarted it because he's nice like that." Boomstick added as Batman was shown punching a giant of a man.
"Should've left him dead." Vegeta muttered.
"Vegeta…"
"I'm serious. His name is 'Bane', and he's clearly not someone who would ever show compassion. What do you think would happen if he worked for someone like Frieza?" Vegeta remarked, and Bulma bit her lip, not having an immediate answer.
"If you stop someone's heart with electricity, how long do you have before they're dead?" Piccolo asked.
"It's hard to say. From what I've been told, they say in the medical field that 'They're not dead until they're warm and dead.' As some people have been out for nearly an hour, but they were able to be brought back." Bulma answered. "Looking from the size of him, Bane – I think that's what they called him – could be out for more than a few minutes and still be brought back."
"Is it possible to stop your heart, and then re-start it?" Trunks asked.
"I don't know, and I don't want ANY of you to try and find out." Bulma said sternly.
"Bane later said "Thank You" the only way he knew how." Boomstick said in a somewhat cheery tone.
Everyone winced as Bane sapped Batman's spine in two. Goten and Trunks reacted more vocally than anyone else, and while normally Vegeta might tell his son to face it, as it was part of combat… not this time.
"You still think I'm wrong about leaving him dead?"
(*Cues: Attack of the Batwing - Batman (1989)*)
"I'm surprised Batty didn't pull something out of the Utility Belt to stop that one, considering it seems to contain anything Batman could ever need. Weapons, tools, even... shark repellent."
"He can't seriously-" Piccolo began, but Batman was then shown hanging on a ladder, with a shark hanging on at the end. Grabbing what looked like a can of spray paint, Batman sprayed it in the shark's face, and it seemed to grow irritated, and let go. "Well then."
"Actually, that's a common misconception, the Shark Repellent was stored in the helicopter that Robin was flying, NOT Batman's Utility Belt." Wiz countered, bringing up a fair point,
"Oh yeah, because that makes it SOOO much less ridiculous." Vegeta and Boomstick said at the same time.
"Couldn't he just… punch the shark?" Goten asked aloud. "Mike Haggar piledrove them, and Batman seems like he could kick Haggar's ass."
"Fair question." Goku nodded, questioning why Batman didn't just punch said shark and call it a day.
"Batman also carries Explosive Gel. A cluster of this substance can be sprayed onto nearly any surface and remotely detonate, perfect for distractions and taking enemies down." Wiz added as Batman sprayed a blue gel-bat.
"Or you know, the cooler thing... BLOWING S**T UP!" Boomstick shouted as several of the gel-bats exploded, taking down a stone wall. On the one hand, those watching thought that was rather interesting, but on the other hand, they knew that most likely they wouldn't use it responsibly. "Tip for Criminals: if you know Batman's after you, avoid anything shaped like a Bat. And if you see Batman, RUN."
"Somebody in here?" A man asked as he opened a door, seeing the shadowy figure of Batman standing near a desk. Batman stared at the man, who quickly realized who was in the room and wordlessly closed the door.
"Something Wrong?" A second man asked.
"Nope."
"That might be the smartest criminal… ever." Piccolo mused.
(*Cues: The Dark Knight Triumphant/ End titles - Batman: The Dark Knight Returns*)
"Historically, Bruce chose the guise of a Bat to project his own fear of the flying mammal onto his enemies, as well as adapting it due to the guise of living in shadows and striking without being seen. However, that is not the Batsuit's only purpose." Wiz said as Bulma started taking notes.
BATSUIT
Repurposed Nomex Survival Suit
Almost Totally Bulletproof
Flame and Shock Resistant
Cape Doubles as Glider Thanks To Science-Stuff ("Be specific! That's the science stuff I'm trying to figure out!" Bulma yelled. "Mom. It's a tv show.")
"Thanks to some Military-Grade Armor he stole from his own company with Morgan Freeman's permission, the Batsuit is almost completely bulletproof, knife proof, electricity proof, punch proof, dog proof and theftproof. However, it does how some crucial flaws which can't really be addressed without weakening the overall strength."
"Tear resistant?" Bruce asked, looking at what those watching assumed were the base of the Batsuit.
"This sucker will stop a knife." Fox replied.
"Bulletproof?"
"Anything but a straight shot."
"Why didn't they put it into production?" Bruce asked, raising a very good question.
"Bean counters didn't think a soldier's life was worth 300 grand. Then there's this." He continued, picking up what looked like the material Batman's cape would be made of. "It's called memory cloth. Notice anything?"
"No."
"Regularly flexible. But put a current through it..." The cloth suddenly sprang into the shape of a one-person tent. "Molecules re-align, becomes rigid."
"That's genius!" Bulma remarked, writing that down.
"What kind of shapes can you make?"
"It can be tailored to fit any structure based on a rigid skeleton."
"So that's how he flies." Trunks realized.
"Inside Batman's Cowl is an array of High-Tech Gear commonly used for listening to Police Scanners and Communicating with Allies." Wiz continued as more aspects of Batman's cowl were shown. "But in combat, Batman finds more use in its Night, Infrared and Ultraviolet Vision. Also, its built-in Triangulation Imaging System, which hacks into the world's cellphones and creates a Digital 3D Map which can be used to mark and track specific bodies."
"You mean he can see EVERYTHING I do, just because I have a phone?" Boomstick asked.
"More or Less."
"That seems like a massive invasion of privacy." Piccolo muttered. "Now I'm glad I've never used one of those things."
"Honestly? I think Batman is the only guy who wouldn't use it for the wrong reasons." Goku shrugged.
"Ask him where I left my keys..." Boomstick added.
(*Cues: Dark Knight - The Dark Knight*)
"Aside from routine Mass Invasions of Privacy, Batman's resume includes such accomplishments as dodging Darksied's virtually unavoidable Omega Beams, withstanding the vacuum of space for 24 seconds, fought for twenty-eight hours straight, all while refusing to kill any of his opponents, ran through bazooka fire. And… breaking free from a coffin, buried 6 feet underground, in a straitjacket after being deprived of sleep for days all while having a cocktail of unknown drugs in his system along with The Joker's latest Venom Toxin."
"…wow…" Was all Goten said after the last feat was said.
"I swear, he's gotta be doing all this just to show off." Trunks muttered.
"Ah, the Vegeta crimefighting method." Piccolo said aloud.
"Shut up."
"I mean, that can't be that hard…" Goku shrugged. "Sure, punch through a box, dig up through the ground, big deal!"
"WHAT THE F**K?! Are we positive that we're positive he's not superhuman?!" Boomstick exclaimed. "I mean, Joker's Fear Toxin not only kills whomever it infects within hours, and literally can break their mind in two, and make them laugh themselves to death, and is still poisonous!"
"That sounds… horrific." Bulma frowned. "And I have a feeling we'll be seeing him eventually."
"I friggin' hate clowns…" Goten muttered, shivering slightly.
"Well, given his line of work, the fact that this is comics, and he's done some much crazy stuff. I wouldn't be surprised if he stumbled into a room filled with Gamma Rays or something like that." Wiz shrugged. "But underneath the Batsuit, he is affected by knives and bullets the same as any other mortal man. His bones have been broken-"
"As they've pointed out multiple times." Vegeta said flatly.
"-and even though he usually comes out victorious, his self-confidence occasionally put him in life-threatening situations he can't escape without help. Despite how much he seems to think he can do it solo."
"Like Bane's "Thank You Spine Durability Test". Ask your doctor if it's right for you."
"Also, as we've previously said, his mental frame is usually called into question. Whenever someone close to him is killed in the line of duty, Batman usually takes it HARD. Also, his 'no guns, no killing' rule has been a sore spot for many comic fans…"
"I don't get that; wouldn't it be better to ensure these guys can't hurt anyone ever again?" Goten asked.
"I'd say so." Vegeta nodded.
"In some cases, it's better to put a threat down for good, lest they return and keep hurting people." Piccolo shook his head. "That's not to say some threats can't change. Just look at Android 18 and Majin Buu."
"-but that's a topic for another day. Still, the Caped Crusader has consistently found a way to survive even the most life-threatening situations." Wiz stated.
"And Bats has no problem continuously going toe-to-toe with evil in the name of Justice... Vengeance." Boomstick declared as an explosion went off, blowing a wall down, and a shadowy figure appeared.
"From this moment on, none of you are safe..." Batman stated, and the doors closed.
It was hot as hell. Also, it was hell. The food was hell, the traffic was hell, war was hell- I have pages of these, I can go on!
Okay, okay. Fine.
Jumping around on a series of spires, a figure landed on the burned ground and looked around. He was here for a reason, not a good reason, okay, well, to him it was a good reason. But that's beside the point. The figure whistled to himself as he flew across the blood lakes, passing two ogre-like beasts with clubs, waving to them casually as he flew.
"Welcome to the home for infinite losers…" He chuckled to himself, landing and jumping down several layers, not coming to the flowers and joyful music that Friza was trapped in, but to the melted wax and metal cocooning several others… one in particular.
"Hey." The figure waved as he approached what he came for.
"W..what…what do…you want…?" The restrained figure weakly rasped, looking up.
"To annoy a friend."
"Wh..what…?"
"Hang on. How are you here? Do you have a- Never mind. …look, I need to borrow you for a bit. You're gonna see some old friends. I just need to find someone else… wait, no. Two someone elses. One down here, and one up there…"
"Wha…what are you… talking about?"
"Don't worry." The figure said, pulling an ice pick from behind him despite his hands being restrained. "ROAD TRIP!"
Captain America
(*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - Captain America*)
"From the very beginning, Steve Rogers was never given an easy life. Born to poor Irish immigrants in Manhattan on July 4th, 1920, Steven Rogers grew up with little money, few friends-"
"And even fewer muscles! Good Lord, is that Steve Rogers or Jack Skellington? Somebody get that kid a sandwich!"
"Oh, wow… yeah, that kid needs something to eat."
"Is he doing that thing where you make yourself vomit to lose weight?"
"Wait. What?" Goten blinked. "What are you talking about?"
"Yeah, apparently there's this thing where you jam your fingers in your throat to make yourself vomit and lose weight." Trunks explained.
"Sorry, what?" Goku asked.
"Trunks. How do you know about that?" Bulma asked, concerned.
"Uh…"
"But his sheer willpower, selflessness, and desire for justice stood out. As those around him left to serve in the Second World War, Rogers was desperate to fight for his country." Wiz continued. "But due to his lacking physique and health problems, he was turned away from every single Military Organization multiple times."
"Hrmph. Easy to see why." Vegeta scoffed. "He looks like Yamcha could beat him in a fight."
"Y'know, you don't have to be so mean to him." Bulma frowned.
"I don't, but he doesn't give me anything to respect."
BACKGROUND
BEFORE TRANSFORMATION
- Height: 5'4" / 1.6 m
- Weight: 95 lbs. / 43.1 kg
AFTER TRANSFORMATION
- Height: 6'2" / 1.9 m
- Weight: 220 lbs / 99.8 kg
- Both Parents Died Early In His Life ("Because comics." Piccolo said flatly.)
- Usually The Leader Of The Avengers
- Was Once Mutated Into "Spider-King"
- Secretly A Habitual Car Thief
"I'm only asking this because I'm curious, not because I'm gonna do this." Trunks began, and Bulma's face clearly said 'Sure'. "What do you do with a stolen car? Can't people just… track it?"
"You sell the parts, mainly." Goku shrugged. "Cut up the car, take what might make you some money, easy enough."
"Okay, how do you know that?" Bulma asked.
"Movies."
"Are we not questioning the 'transformation' thing?" Goten asked, that having been something which stuck out to him in particular.
"Meanwhile Hitler was creating a new group of super nazis with lasers, called HYDRA."
"HAIL, HYDRA!" An armada of men shouted, raising two fist a in a salute. It was clear to everyone that these were the bad guys, and Vegeta seemed more agitated than anyone. Then again, could you blame him?
(*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - Training the Supersoldier*)
"Desperate to combat this new threat, Uncle Sam began the top-secret "Project Rebirth", it looked like Rogers would finally get his chance to be the hero after all." Wiz explained as the skinny Steve Rogers was shown being injected with several needles.
"No. No. NO. NO." Goku winced recoiling in genuine fear at the sight of the green liquid being injected into Steve.
"HA! You fear needles, Kakarot?!" Vegeta laughed. "Pathetic!"
"You fear worms." Bulma said flatly, and Vegeta shot her an annoyed look.
"...Provided he survived an untested, unstable, unprecedented experience." Wiz added as Steve was shown in some sort of metal sarcophagus. Also, there was a lot of screaming as some sort of machine seemed to be doing… comic science stuff.
"After an injection of some mystery juice and tanning in Vita-Rays. Because comic logic-" Boomstick began.
"I don't know what that is." Bulma shook her head, cutting off the inevitable question. Only for a text box to appear which read:
'Vita Rays is an electromagnetic radiation with a specific wavelength that has stabilizing properties. It was used to activate the properties of the Super Soldier Serum.'
"Hm… fascinating." Bulma mused. "From the looks of it, that stuff is essentially required to activate the powers of the serum. Whatever that is."
"-Rogers lived! And as a plus, he became a nazi Annihilating, Terrorist Thrashing symbol of freedom: Captain America!"
Inexplicably, two machine guns began firing off next to an eagle while explosions went off.
"'MERICA!"
"Huh…"
"Yeah, sounds about right."
(*Cues: Captain America's Theme - Marvel vs. Capcom 3*)
"The Super Soldier Serum pushed Steve's body to the absolute limit of human physical and mental potential… and then some!" Wiz continued as Captain America effortlessly ran through an entire squad of goons, throwing a shield which hit four of the six men, and he kicked the fifth, flipping off of him and landing on the sixth.
"A homeless guy sold me a Super Serum once. I woke up in Denny's a week later without my wallet… or pants." Boomstick muttered.
"Ew…" Bulma groaned.
"Why would- never mind." Goten muttered, thinking about what Boomstick was implying, but halfway through the thought he shook his head. "I feel like if you wake up without pants, something bad happened…"
"With his new body, Rogers can bench press 1100 lbs and run a mile in 73 seconds. By comparison, the bench press world record without the aid of a bench shirt is Eric Spoto's 722 lbs and the fastest mile run belongs to Hicham Guerouj of Morocco of 3 minutes 43 seconds, that makes Rogers nearly twice as strong and over three times as fast as the most physically fit human beings in the world. Keep in mind, Steve is still technically human."
"Huh, not bad." Goku shrugged. "Wonder what would happen if we used that stuff…"
"Kakarot, that-" Vegeta began but stopped himself thinking it over.
"That's a really bad idea, you two." Piccolo said seriously. "Just by looking at it, the only reason it worked was because Rogers was so small. If either of you went through that, your bodies would effectively swell to a point where neither of you could move. You'd just be weighed down by all your muscles."
"Eh, there'd be no challenge in it either." Vegeta shrugged. "Why cheat to get stronger, there's no victory in overcoming your limits."
"Ture that!"
ABILITES
- Adept In All fighting Styles
- Master Tactician
- Multi-Lingual
- Proficient In All Weapons, Though He Typically Only Uses His Shield
- Expert Acrobat
- Capable Of Chi Manipulation ("Huh, he's a Ki user?")
- Can Resist All Forms Of Mind Control
- Proficient In Driving all Kinds Of Vehicles
"On top of that, he can even dodge gunfire at point-blank range by, in his own words, "Seeing Faster."… yes, really." Boomstick spoke up.
"Which is the absolutely stupidest way of saying that his brain can process images faster than a normal human." Wiz groaned.
"Yeah, that is a pretty stupid way to describe it…" Bulma groaned.
"I mean, why not just say he can think faster?" Goku asked.
"Putting his new abilities to good use, he's adept in every single form of hand-to-hand combat known to man. That's right, I bet you didn't know that Captain America was a ninja."
"Jujitsu, Kung-Fu, Krav Maga?" A man in a green-and-yellow outfit remarked.
"All of the above." Captain America nodded.
"Despite his incredible physical potential, the military initially decided Super Steve was best suited as..."
"Special Forces fighter?"
"Vigilante?"
"Black Ops. Operative?"
"Hero for hire?"
(*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - The Star Spangled Man*)
"The US Army Poster Boy." Wiz said flatly, as Captain America came out onto a stage, and partook in a musical number that made Vegeta feel slightly less humiliated by his routine a few months ago. It could've been… that. Sure, the song seemed iconic in a way that none of those watching could exactly pin down, but the whole thing just felt like a mockery of what Captain America was made to do.
"Why?" Trunks muttered. "That just… that just feels wrong."
"Nice song, but-" Goku began.
"He looks like an idiot." Vegeta cut him off.
"That suit looks like it was ripped from a Patriotic Circus." Boomstick commented.
"It was." Wiz said.
"Yeah, I can see that." Piccolo mused. "Although that might just be an analogy for war…"
"That'd be pretty smart, actually." Vegeta admitted with a slight nod.
"Really? Well, at least he upgraded to suits not made for a circus later on." Boomstick remarked as a few revisions were shown. Some of them looked cool, some looked off, and then they came to the most modern-looking one. The colour design was somewhat muted, with more of a dark blue than the bright blue of the old days. The texture seemed more like mesh, as if it was woven out of something mixed with fabric.
"That looks pretty cool!" Trunks exclaimed. "What's it made out of?!"
"No, they were too."
"What kind of circus would make a costume with Kevlar, Nomex, and Lightweight Titanium, that's resistant to water, fire, and electric shocks?"
"Some call it World War II." Wiz said flatly.
"Oh... I get it." Boomstick and Goku said.
"Geez. There were two world wars? What were they over?" Goku asked.
"Didn't they mention that in the Godzilla battle?" Goten added.
(*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - Captain America March*)
"But the most iconic aspect of Cap's attire is his famous Shield. Composed of Proto-Adamantium and a mysterious metal from space – or Wakanda – called Vibranium." Wiz continued as a new metal was shown. Bulma quickly writing the name down. "This one-of-a-kind shield was presented to him personally by none other than the 32nd President of the United States, Franklin Delano Roosevelt."
CAP'S SHEILD
- 2.5 Feet In Diameter, Weighs 12 Lbs.
- An Unrepeatable Combination Of Proto-Adamantium And Vibranium
- Its Proto-Adamantium Is Even Stronger Than Regular Adamantium
- Absorbs The Full Blow Of Any Impact
- Conducts Neither Electricity Nor Heat
- Highly Aerodynamic
- Can Only Be Damaged By Tampering with Its Molecular Bonding
"What kind of power does it take to mess with something on a molecular level?" Goten asked.
"Essentially being as powerful if not more so than a God." Piccolo answered.
"So, would we be able to destroy it?" Goku asked.
"Well. Let me think…" Bulma mused. "In your regular forms, most likely, no. That also probably goes for your Super Sayian Forms, up until Super Sayian Blue and Super Sayian God forms. Those two might be able to damage it, but I can't say with certainty, as I don't know the scientific breakdown of Vibranium or Adamantium. If I had to take a wild, un-educated guess; Super Blue might be able to damage it, but the only person I can think of who could destroy it would be Lord Beerus. Or Whis."
"Man, now we gotta get some of this stuff!" Goku remarked. "That'd be a great way to train! Become strong enough to break through that stuff? Nothing could stop me then!"
"And like a badass, Cap doesn't just use his shield for defending himself. He hurls that motherf**ker at just about anything that moves!"
"The combination of the two metals allows the shield to absorb and reflect practically all kinetic energy and thus ricochet off multiple targets with only minor loss in velocity." Wiz continued while Bulma took everything in. Goku paused, wondering what kind of attack they could make like that. It kinda looked like Krillin's Destructo Discs, but those cut through everything, making them bouncing off things difficult. "Captain America utilizes this in combination with his super-soldier mind to predict and calculate the shield's trajectory so that it always ends up back in hand no matter how many targets it has struck."
"Hrgh, not bad." Vegeta conceded.
"Cap's shield can reflect anything from bullets to lasers, decapitate vampires, and stop a blow from Thor's Hammer. And if you recall, Mjolnir doesn't screw around."
Thor came flying down, Mjölnir sparking with lightning and struck the center of Cap's shield. A massive 'GOOOOOOONG' sound emanated, and the resulting shockwave decimated the surrounding forest in a massive display of power.
"Wow…" Goten blinked. "That thing… can cut someone in two, but his shield can block it?!"
"Maybe we should look into that." Vegeta muttered. "It's too big to be effective while fighting, but it may have other uses."
"-this giant Frisbee of freedom is so cool, even Superman wants one!" Boomstick added, and Goku perked up at the mention of his eventual Death Battle rival.
"Hey, Peggy. You think this'll work?" Captain America asked, and without warning, a woman grabbed a gun and fired several shots off at the shield (which was just a silver colour). But the shield didn't seem effected in the slightest.
"Yes, I think it works." The woman nodded, seeming irritated over something.
"I get the feeling they're a couple." Piccolo smirked. "That seems a lot like something either you and Bulma or you and Chi-Chi would do."
"I don't think Chi-Chi knows how to use a gun." Goku muttered.
"That- ugh. Never mind."
(*Cues: Captain America: The Winter Soldier - Lemurian Star*)
"But it's not unstoppable, it's been damaged and even destroyed its fair share of times over the years, but only by Cosmic or Reality warping powers." Wiz added. "Or when Marvel needs to artificially raise the stakes."
"So, Beerus, Janemba, Whis, maybe Babidi, maybe Buu, maybe Frieza, and Zeno could most likely destroy it." Piccolo listed off his theory of beings powerful enough to destroy Captain America's shield.
"Luckily, Mr. America doesn't rely only on his shield."
"He's boxed Thor to a standstill, was deemed worthy to wield Mjolnir and has even managed to incapacitate The Hulk with his knowledge of Pressure Points." Wiz explained as a few pictures were shown, the fighters finally getting a good look at who 'The Hulk' was.
"Man, he looks like Piccolo, but massive…"
"WAIT, GO BACK TO THAT SECOND ONE! Did THIS GUY, just kick THE HULK, IN THE DICK?!" Boomstick shouted, showing a picture of Captain America kicking Hulk in in the Hunk… "You've gotta be a real man to give the Green Goliath a nut check. I mean, that's the fastest way to piss off a dude. And who don't we like when they're angry? That guy. Balls of steel right there. Great big, eagle-shaped, freedom balls of steel…"
"I… did not need that image in my head." Bulma groaned.
"How does that work?" Trunks asked. "They can't-"
"Drop it." Vegeta ordered.
FEATS AND STRENGTHS
- Survived Being Frozen In Ice For 70 Years ("Huh, what would that be like?" Goten wondered.)
- Can Run Almost 50 mph / 80.5 kph
- Caught A Torpedo With His Bare Hands
- Jumps Out Of A Plane At Cruising Altitude Into Water Without A Parachute
- Threw The Hulk Off His Feet ("Eh. I could do that." Vegeta scoffed.)
- Jumps 20-30 Feet High
- Led The Avengers
(*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - Invader's Montage*)
"And to top everything off, not many Superheroes can claim to have defeated the fearsome foursome of Crack, Weed, Ice, and Ms. Fix: The literal personifications of actual Street Drugs." Wiz added as… those characters was shown.
"That is the stupidest thing I have ever seen." Vegeta muttered.
"So, you're telling me he's preaching an anti-drug message, KNOWING that drugs are the entire reason he became awesome?!"
"So, they're saying do drugs, get stronger?" Goten asked.
"I think so." Goku shrugged.
"NO!" Bulma shouted.
"I mean-" Piccolo began but coughed awkwardly when Bulma glared at him.
"I guess we can add "Hypocrite" to his list of aliases." Wiz commented. "All in all, despite being a physically perfect human, Captain America more or less has the same weaknesses as any other man, his patriotic uniform can only protect him so much from stabbing weapons. He has little to no defense against magic attacks, and he's gotten tossed around by most of the Marvel Universes characters at one point or another."
"And sniper bullets, God knows he gets killed pretty good by those." Boomstick stated as Captain America was shown… dead. "AHHH, WEAPONS! MY ONLY WEAKNESS! How did you... know...?"
"Boomstick, you know that death came after one of the most controversial and politically charged events in comic history, right? And he was only out there because he surrendered to stop the deaths of more innocents after children ended up dead, right?"
"What!? I didn't see that in the movie…"
"I feel like we're missing something." Piccolo said.
(*Cues: Captain America: The First Avenger - Triumphant Return*)
"Even in the face of Death, Captain America always stands for what the United States' needs. Putting the freedom of the innocent above all else."
"And sometimes that's serving Hitler an American-sized knuckle sandwich! 'MERICA!" Boomstick shouted.
"Who are you supposed to be?"
"I'm… Captain America." The good Captain said as the doors closed. While she hadn't gotten what she came for, she found the new information fascinating. Bulma now wanted to look into Adamantium, Vibranium and the other metals mentioned here, as they could revolutionize multiple fields of science, medicine and constriction!
Everyone else was here for the fight.
DEATH BATTLE
The doors opened on an alleyway, the city (presumably Gotham) was shrouded in its usual inky night-black coat, with only a few lights from signs and windows giving brief flickers of light and sight to the city below. With surprising grace and silence, Captain America dropped from the top of a building into the alley. With his shield on his back, the good Captain looked around, clearly looking for… something.
"Tony. You sure this is the place?"
"Yeah, yeah. Gotham. Right? That's where the vampire sightings are coming from. Make sure you've got stakes and onions."
"…that's garlic, Tony."
"Eh, I like garlic, hate onions."
The camera turns into the shadowy parts of the alley, and we see two blank eyes. These eyes belong to Batman.
(*Cues: Batman: Arkham Origins - Assassins*)
Batman approaches the good Captain slowly and takes a combat stance. Captain America turned around and noticed Batman. There were no words, but Captain America responded by getting into a fighting stance.
FIGHT!
Captain America instantly throws his shield at Batman. It hit one of Batman's gauntlets and ricocheted off, keeping Batman in a defensive stance and allowing Cap to sprint forwards him and grab the shield as it bounced off of a wall and came back to him.
Cap starts pummeling Batman with punches and kicks (due to his knowledge of pressure points and his study of different martial arts), but Batman starts avoiding the attacks, and counters with a kick just below the Captain's mid-section, trying to both keep him somewhat at a distance, but also close enough to keep him with in physical combat distance. Not wasting any time. Batman threw three of his Batarangs at Captain America, all of which seemed to scratch the shield, but that was all. Captain America threw his might shield once more, only for Batman to jump over it and fire his Batclaw at his opponent. The grappling hook grabbed onto Steve's arm, but Batman tensed as if he realized something.
"Aren't they in an alley?" Goten asked.
"Yeah, why?"
"Isn't Cap's sheild-"
To answer the question, Batman jumped, but the shield was quicker. It didn't his Batman in the back of the head, but as he tried to flip out of the way, his shoulder did get hit, which spun him out of control in the air. Captain America pulled the claw off and caught his shield as he and Batman ran at each other. Batman pulled a fist back, but Cap held his shield out and a long, echoing 'GoOoOnNGgG' seemed to vibrate through the entire alley. Goku didn't know why, but his jaw felt weird after that. Cap was stronger, and continued with his shield, hitting Batman in the chest and sending him flying back into the wall.
"…hrgh… what is that made of?" Batman muttered, banging his fists together and activating his shock gloves. He ran forward and hit with a flurry of punches Goku recognized from his training, but nothing seemed to affect the shield.
"Huh. Batman really doesn't have anything to deal with that, does he?" Goku remarked.
"Surprisingly, no." Vegeta muttered, having voted for Batman to win after the last battle he was in.
Cap hit Batman with his shield, knocking him back, but Batman seemed to be okay with this, as he threw a barrage of smoke bombs down. Those watching weren't sure what the plan here was, but Batman seemed to have a strategy, but so did Captain America…
"Let's finish this. Hyper...!" Captain America declared, dashing forward….
BOOF BOOF BOOF PSHHHH the smoke bombs exploded, clouding the entire alley in thick smoke. Captain America coughed, but kept his stance up and ready.
"Hey dad, have you ever had to fight through a smokescreen?" Trunks asked, and Vegeta thought it over.
"A few times." The Prince nodded. "It's… more annoying than it should be."
Despite being able to 'see better', Captain America didn't see the incoming Batarangs, and one of them dug into his shoulder. Yelling in agitation, he threw his shield into the smoke, and it clearly hit… something. Then everything went quiet.
Clang clang clang clang… At the last moment, Captain America realized his shield was incoming, and caught it… only to see a bat painted on it. The gel (predictably) exploded.
"Hm. Not bad." Piccolo nodded. "Take away his sight, wait for him to throw his only weapon, then send it back to him.
Batman leapt in and used his knowledge of pressure points to keep Cap at bay. The Super Solider was already off-guard from the explosion, but the pressure point attacks weren't helping. He fell to his knees, and then had his face slammed onto Batman's armored knee. Batman continued his attack by grabbing the Shield and walking behind Cap.
(*Cues: Batman Begins - Train Fight*)
Before Cap can regain his senses, Batman (somehow) knocked Cap into the sky and uses his grappling hook to grab Cap by the neck. Those watching didn't comment, having a feeling this battle was about to be-
CRACK
…over.
Cap was violently jerked down towards the ground, and the hook wrapped around a nearby lamppost, breaking the Star-Spangled Hero's neck instantly as he hangs above the street.
"Ouch." Goku winced. "…still, that wasn't the WORST death we've seen…"
"Something about the lack of blood makes it kinda unsettling." Goten said.
"Thinking about it, there really was no way Batman would lose." Vegeta said, acting as if he had never doubted his choice, and he didn't, screw you. "Batman could've thrown the shield away when he had it, and then just beat him to death. There was no way Batman would lose a physical fight, even against someone like Captain America."
"You really think Cap couldn't've won?" Bulma asked, somewhat curious to Vegeta's reasoning.
"Most likely not. If he had been more aggressive, then yes. His shield effectively made him untouchable, but he had no other weapons like Batman did. Even if he just had a gun, or a sword or something, that would've been a major advantage in defeating him. Still, the strongest warriors are bred, they don't need drugs to get there."
"I agree!" Goku nodded.
K.O.!
Batman threw Cap's shield at the hanging Captain America, slicing off the bottom half of his body and after that throwing a smoke pellet into the ground disappearing into the night.
"Okay, that wasn't necessary…"
Results
(*Cues: Batman Arkham City - Main Theme*)
"I pledge allegiance, to the Cap, hanging miserably from the light post…" Boomstick said somberly.
"That's… even less necessary…"
"Captain America most certainly did have the endurance and power advantage, and Batman himself has admitted he COULD lose a hand-to-hand match against him, but there's a big difference between COULD and WOULD." Wiz explained.
"I COULD survive a fall out of an airplane, but I wouldn't bet on it. Unless you're doing it, Wiz, you should totally try it. 5 bucks if you make it."
"Same." Trunks said looking to Goten.
"Where are we gonna get a plane?"
"Skorch?"
"Yeah!"
"NO!" Bulma shouted, shooting the idea down.
"You're an idiot, Boomstick." Wiz muttered. "Also, the fact is, Batman is more than a boxer. His stealth and disarming skills allowed him to turn the fight in his favour. He may be physically weaker, we're not one hundred percent sure on that, but he most certainly did have the better tactics, training, and gear."
"Not to mention the gadgets. Just because Cap could "see faster" doesn't mean he can see hard enough to spot Bats through a solid wall of smoke. While Batman can see through smoke, walls, human bodies… yeah. Also, Cap only had one real weapon, while Batman had many more, which he easily could've used to disarm Cap."
"Batman also regularly battles and sneaks around super-beings far above your average Laser nazi. Such as the time he dodged Darksied's Omega Beams, which can travel faster than the speed of light."
"How do you get lasers to move faster than light?" Trunks asked. "And could you do it with Ki?"
"If he can ninja around SUPERMAN'S Super Hearing, there's no reason he can't do the same to Captain America."
"Man, I REALLY wanna see who this 'Superman' guy is! If I'm gonna fight him, it's gotta be awesome!" Goku exclaimed. (We're working towards there, folks, just sit tight.)
"And, of course, Batman has more knowledge of Pressure Points and fighting styles, because he's mastered all of them, rather than simply being adept, helping him incapacitate and finish off the Star-Spangled Soldier."
"Hrgh… should probably look into those…" Vegeta muttered. "Strength is one thing, but being able to take down someone that quickly? That'd be useful…"
"Captain America just couldn't hang in there." Boomstick remarked.
"That… forget it."
"The winner, is Batman." Wiz concluded. Over all, the fight was interesting. Bulma was a bit disappointed she didn't get what she was looking for, but now she had new things to try and look into… except the only way to learn more about them was currently gone, but whatever.
"Next time on Death Battle!" Boomstick declared.
Sparks flew as a figure was hitting metal with a hammer. He seemed to be making some sort of helmet, or perhaps armor. With each strike on metal, the sparks illuminated the man as the camera got closer.
"Take away the suit, what are you?"
"Genius, billionaire playboy philanthropist."
A red-and-gold helmet was set down on a table, the man turned around and addressed whoever he was talking to.
"There's a shawarma joint about two blocks from here. I don't know what it is but I wanna try it."
IRON MAN
"Can we watch the next one!?" Goten asked excitedly.
"Your classes start soon, go get ready for them." Bulma ordered. "We'll watch it later.
"Aww…" The boys seemed downcast, getting up and leaving.
Somewhere Else…
Nothing.
Nothing left.
There was nothing left.
"So, why don't I feel victorious?"
There was no response.
"The Lords of Lords have been exterminated, along with all the Gods of Destruction. Even Trunks no longer exists in this future… that should mean there's no one left to challenge me, right?"
"…"
"No…that's wrong…"
Continuing silence.
"The Gods, the Sayians. None of them can stop what's begun… not anymore…"
"And what about them? What about him?" The figure argued with itself.
"Patience… I have nothing to worry about, I have all the tools needed for my victory… I understand my enemies better than they know themselves…" The figure smiled, grinning as they picked something up. "In time, they will fall. They all will. They will die, burned to ashes by the fires of the those who sought to stop us… and the ones they were stupid enough to believe would protect them… and then… there will be peace…"
Trunks was bored… He was stuck at his classes, waiting for them to end. He really hoped something interesting would happen sooner or later. They had spent the past hour learning about alternate timelines and things like that. Sure, he had seen the Warper News Network thing, but when would they ever need to use-
Br-ZaATtT!
Without warning, a large spherical machine landed in the backyard, seemingly materializing out of nowhere. There was silence, then panic.
"…mom?" Trunks blinked. "MOM!"
When Bulma got outside, the figure from the machine had struggled to get out, and weakly stood up, looking up at everyone, and weakly got out:
"…he…he's….he's coming…. Father…. ne..nee…neee…need….to warn them…." The older Trunks groaned, then fell forward, and fell unconscious.
"Hey, Guy."
"That's not my name, Matchstick." The old man chuckled, not looking up from the book he was reading, a book titled ソロモンのレメゲトン, a book which intrigued Skorch, but Guy seemed to be reading a lot. That, or he was re-reading ダンテの地獄. Skorch didn't know when Guy got here (apparently, he was here before Skorch…) but the old man seemed content.
"Hurgh… Okay…" Skorch muttered quietly, wandering down the endless shelves of books. "ドラゴンボール… ドラゴンボール… would that be under Toriyama, Akira, or Viz…?"
Descending deeper into the library, Skorch listened to the soft record playing a soft, gentle piano song from a game the caretaker, Kassir, really liked. Animal something, something World, all Skorch knew was the name, The Roost.
"…okay…so if Kirby showed up like that, does that mean that the doorway is weakening? No, that can't be it… most likely because of the Death Battles, it's easier to find their way to this world… At the end of the day, I don't think that matters too much… right now, I gotta find the book and then get outta here. I don't know what'll happen in the future, so I need to get on that…"
"And don't forget, whatever happens, you can't change it!" A voice spoke in the Entity's head.
"Maybe… but… forget it. Let's do some reviews."Skorch muttered, pulling a book off the shelf and opening it. "First one comes from a 'cameron taylor', who wrote…
i like the chapter but in my opinion death battle downplayed Godzilla abet i mean he has feet's that make him low multiverse i mean he Merged with space and time. Can mess with time as if it's a harp. Even at the least, God Mountain made everything and nothingness, and Godzilla killed him. Destroyed Hell, which has nine realms) this is slightly above Beerus who can destroy 6 realms/universes as it was stated he could destroy two universes but universes in dragon ball are macrocosms witch each have 3 universes.
"…that's fair. Thing is, there's SO much lore to Godzilla, 'Azure Dragon of the East' brought this up in their review, writing…
No one ever talks about Super Godzilla, a form that surpasses even Burning Godzilla.
"This is also a good point, but I had to decide how much to dive into with Godzilla. At the end of the day, there was so much more I could go into, but on the flipside, Gamera barely has any powers aside from what's been shown in the episode. If I brought in everything for Gojira, then the battle would've been shorter. Next review is from an 'IrishKatana', hi again! Who wrote…
Hey just an idea for a gag but when you do the Chuck Norris vs Segata battle maybe have all of the gods, angles, and Zeno's know about them and being scared to death of them so bad that the mere mention of their names turns them white as a sheet.
"I'm unsure when I'm gonna do Chuck Norris vs Segata… honestly, I was all pumped to do it, but… recent events have put a damper on my excitement to do so. Look, I know you're supposed to separate the art from the artist – and considering how much I mock the world's most successful pedophile, Michael Jackson you'd think I'd be better at it – but I'm waiting for some things to cool down, y'know? Sorry to disappoint. Also… Zeno's? Wasn't there the one? whatever. Our final review comes from 'Acedragoon', who wrote…
Do you plan to do the top 10 would like to see their reactions to some of them especially top 10 op comic characters during the tournament of power for all universes and top 10 manliest characters?
"No. We're here for the Death Battles, and sometimes other stuff. I don't have the time to go through all that stuff. Besides, I can't change enough in them that it could be considered 'original' under potential D-Zero copyright law."
Skorch stopped and checked the surrounding books, well, they were closer to their target, but not quite there.
"Just so you all know, I ain't gonna be around for a bit. When I go down here, I go AFK. Don't worry! I've got an automated review responder, and the battles should go on as planned! Hopefully there aren't too many questions the Z-Crew want answered… and besides, it'll just be them watching the battles!
Opening a book, he looked at the upcoming battles, knowing the two that were coming up next would be of interest to most, as one of Yes, these three battles would be a lot of fun! Wait. Three battles!?
"What's the third- Oh. Oh… OH… Oh, that reminds me. I need to call someone…"
Looking at the books, the entity muttered: "Okay… here we are. OG, Z, GT, Kai, ZGT, Reincarnated as Yamcha, Resurrection 'F'… no… ah. Vol. 1 Vol… Wait. What?! Wh-where's… they should be right here! They HAVE to be right here!"
Panic briefly overtaking the Entity, abandoning his physical form, Skorch flew down the row, looking at the quickly passing books fore he came to a screeching halt at the 'T' section. The books he were looking for were here, but in the wrong place.
"…who's the idiot who put them here!? Why the heck would you put ドラゴンボール next to 東京喰種 トーキョーグール?!" Skorch growled, grabbing the books he needed, and heading towards the archives. Making sure no one was present; the entity flipped its flip phone open and dialed.
Buzz… Buzz…
"…"
Click
Buzz… Buzz… Buzz…
"…"
Click
Buzz… Buzz… Buzz… Buzz... Buzz...
"Who is this and how did you get this number? If you call us again, I'll have the authorities-"
"Hey, 18."
"Skorch? How-"
"Don't ask. I have people."
"That's… very unsettling."
"Yeah, yeah… I'm sorry, bad joke. I-"
"GET OFF THE DAMN PHONE!" 18 winced as a new voice screamed, seeming agitated over… something.
"Crap, sorry Kassir! Don't have much time. Listen, I'm deep in the library, so I can't be there to tell you this in person-"
"SKARWRATH! IN TEN SECONDS, I'M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS!"
"Crap! Listen, from what I recall, the next three Death Battles are gonna be dealing with killer robots, cyborgs and stuff like that." Skorch spoke quickly as he jumped over the side of a railing, descending into the archives. He had about ten seconds before the phone would cut out.
"…Skorch, I appreciate your concern." 18 said, her voice softening somewhat. It was and oddly kind gesture from the Entity. "But if a Death Battle has a cyborg or Android in it, that's not an issue with me. I get that it's just a chara-"
"You're in one of them."
Beep.