Chapter 39

Steven laid the rest of the night wide awake with Jackie in his arms, only to move when she would get up for a visit to the restroom. She was half asleep each time she didn't notice how he hadn't been to sleep. His mind would go through what if scenarios, if he could have just told her the truth that he saw a future with her when she asked, what if he had realized that Pam had left again and she was in that house alone. He had a brief moment of thought that she gotten pregnant to trap him, but if that was the case she would have told him. How had she gotten pregnant twice while on the pill? He thought of how last year when they got back together she kept putting off sex saying she wasn't ready, he was frustrated but was less miserable than he had been when he was without her. He felt guilty, did she lose the first baby because of him, had he been there for her like he should have been they may have a baby already, they would have never broke up that last time, Chicago would never have happened, along with the drunken haze of Vegas. He kept his hand on her bump rubbing it and feeling movement from his son.

Jackie woke up to the baby's movements and felt Steven's hand knowing he was awake, she rolled over to face him, not having any memory of the nightmare or the conversation that followed. "Hey" she gave him a quick peck on the lips, and noticed the look of his eyes, red and glazed and expression on his face told her something was wrong, "What is wrong Steven"

He looked at her, he could tell she had no recollection of the nightmare, "Babe do you not remember the nightmare last night?"

Jackie thought back, she had had the same nightmare over the last year. Then she realized what the day was, last year no one said anything about her birthday it just passed without a thought, so different from her 17th, her mom left her again she was broken up again with Steven and then she lost…she looked up at him, "I told you last night didn't I?"

He pulled her back to his arms, tears shed down his cheeks, "yea you did"

"It was a year ago today. Mom left me a year ago today and then I lost the baby I had just found out I was pregnant"

"Not to sound like an asshole, but I thought you was on the pill?"

"I was, but I was on an antibiotic for strep throat still and it causes the pill to be ineffective, no one bothered to tell me that till after I was pregnant."

"I am so sorry babe for you to go through that alone, I hate I couldn't tell you the truth, I don't know why other than I wasn't ready to completely grow up, as much crap as we gave Eric for being a momma's boy, I was one too in truth. Not ready to leave the comforts of Kitty. I was ready in reality, I had a decent job that I could afford it, but I just didn't want to leave being doted on, and Red was less reluctant to kick me out as he was Eric. I guess I was worse than Eric."

"Puddin, I guess I can understand that you had someone to take care of you, I wasn't ready back then to take care of you in that way, cooking and cleaning. I just was so scared about someone taking care of me. There was a household account to pay bills like the utilities and such, but I stretched it because it was only to last till I got out of high school. I had even given thought to dropping out, but I thought I could get to graduation without anyone knowing I was pregnant."

"So do you think that because it was a year today that caused the dream last night?"

"Probably that and the thought of seeing my mom"

"Jacks if seeing your mom is going to cause you stress then we won't do it, you write her a letter or something."

"No I need to face her, then maybe I can move on, and be a better mother than she was"

He took his hand to her chin and lifted her face to his, "you are going to be a wonderful mother, our children will never know the abandonment that we knew and they will know more love than we ever did growing up"

"I love you, did you sleep at all last night?"

"No too much on my mind, all these what ifs going through."

"We can't dwell on the past we have to learn a way to get over it."

They laid there staring at each other, and then Steven remembered something he had put away in a box, he got up and went to his closet and pulled down a box off the top shelf, he figured it was safe there from his little pixie of a wife to reach. He went over and sat on the bed with the box between him and Jackie.

Jackie sat up and looked at the box, "That is the box the boots came in"

"Yea , now I have never shown anyone this, Kitty knew about it, in fact she moved it to a safe place when I decided to let Sam stay. She told me she didn't want me to do anything to it I would regret and she didn't want Sam to find it. I can't believe you didn't find it when you stayed down there when I was gone."

"Honestly I looked for something like that, but I was so sick I couldn't move much."

"Well it was shoved way under the cot, I am surprised Kitty found it." He took and opened the box, the troll doll she had gave him from his first day at Grooves was in there, different items she had worn in her hair, several pairs of her underwear, pictures from prom to the car show they went to with Red and Kitty, letters she had written him before he graduated. There was also a small jewelry box. He picked up the box and looked at her, "I didn't forget your birthday last year, I actually had bought this in hopes that it would help you know how I felt about you, but then I couldn't tell you with words and you broke up with me and I just put it in the box. So I guess this year you get two birthday gifts."

He handed her the box, in it was a pair of earrings, small hearts with two stones in it, she realized it was their birthstones. "I love it, thank you." She got up and went to her mirror and put them in. She looked and still had the charm necklace from last night on, in the past three months he had given her a ring, a bracelet, necklace and earrings, and she never wanted to take any of them off, "Babe I know I have said most of my life I love shiny things, and pushed for jewelry, but I want you to know that all these things the Led Zepplin shirt ranks at the top of your gifts, but I cherish these because I can't always wear the shirt, but I am never taking off this jewelry if I can help it, because it all shows me the same thing, how much you love me."

He walked up to her and took her left hand in both of his, "I do love you, out of everything I regret not giving you right away is going to be those earrings and this ring, I bought the ring the day after we went to the drive in. Then I convinced myself to wait for the right moment, that happened for a month, the morning I got your letter I put it in the shoe box and hadn't opened it till Christmas Eve. Kitty brought it back down to me after I found out you were gone and I didn't know where you were. I had looked for it the night you had given me the shirt back, but I couldn't put it in the box because it was missing, and I wasn't about to ask anyone where it was. Then they would know how I really felt about you and pity me for my mistake of letting you go."

"I almost kept the shirt, I thought it could be the only thing of you to give our baby, but WB convinced me to give it back"

"WHAT!"

"Well I think he had faith that you would come around and he said if anything he would steal another shirt or something of yours for his grandchild"

They ended up having a lazy Sunday afternoon, both were thankful that no one called or stopped by, Steven slept some in his recliner while Jackie laid on the couch watching movies. They both knew that Tuesday was going to come all too soon.

The next day went by rather normal, they slept in so they could go and close up Grooves and Jackie could double check the books, Todd having done the books for the Cheese Shop was very helpful to Jackie. It also helped Steven know he could trust someone with the books when Jackie was off.

Despite his fears both him and Jackie was able to sleep most of the night, aside from the regular bathroom breaks, Tuesday morning they both woke up and started their day as normal breakfast then showers and dressed for the day. As they got into the car Steven turned to Jackie, "Are you sure you want to do this?"

"Yea I am just ready to be over this day and get this behind us."

"I'll be by your side the entire time, you ready to leave just give me a tight squeeze, Michael has already arranged everything, he will be right there as well."

"I love you thank you for letting me do this and coming with you."

"Of course, just don't get too upset if you can help it."

They pulled into the county jail and just sat there a moment, knowing the tension in the car, he turned to her, "I think this is the only time I have driven here on my own" giving her a smile.

"Lets just hope this is the last time you are here on your own or not."

"Well as long as some girl stays clean and doesn't do anything that will cause me to take the wrap for her, we should be good"

"Well I know this girl doesn't have to do any stupid stunts to get you to notice her anymore" She couldn't help the smile on her face with the banter going on between them.

"Come on doll, we have to get this done so we can make your doctor's appointment"

They walked in and was met by Michael waiting for them. "I will show you the room, you guys can take a seat and then they will bring Pam in, it isn't fancy like the movies, no glass between you and phones to talk through."

"I know Michael, I saw my dad here, the glass stuff is in the state prison, and I never have plans to be there again."

As they sat down Michael went to the other door and motioned for the guard to bring Pam in. Steven leaned in, "Maybe with you sitting behind this table she won't realize you're pregnant"

"I don't know."

"Jackie, Steven I need to remind you guys to keep calm voices if the situation gets tense we will get Pam out of here pronto"

Jackie looked up at who she now just considered a friend, no longer ex, "thank you Michael"

Pam was brought in the room and looked and saw Jackie and Steven, she was not expecting him to be there. "What are you doing here?"

"I wasn't letting my wife come here alone" Steven said to her flatly.

"So he already has a chain on your money? Guess you are not here to post my bail?"

"Mom do you really think that after all the years that you left me alone and was never there for you when I needed you that I would seriously consider being here for you?"

"I am your mother!"

"And I am your daughter, your responsibility, but I was always someone you just pawned off for someone else to take care of and then you left me when I needed you most twice!"

"You were old enough to take care of yourself"

"Pam she was sixteen years old, she was not old enough to take care of herself, she shouldn't of had to, anyone would have broken into that house and hurt her"

"And you would know all about breaking into our house I bet"

"Mom, I am not here to argue with you, I am here to let you know that you and father are out of my life, you said I was old enough to take care of myself well, you are right, but I don't have to do it alone, I have Steven here and we have a life together far better than the life either one of us grew up with. You are not going to be coming around me ever again. But since you are going to prison like father I guess it won't matter."

"Sweetie I had such better plans for you, I had someone lined up for you more worthy of you than this" she pointed at Steven.

"Ha, you don't know me, you never did, and now you never will. Steven loves me and cares for me, something I never got from my parents. Jake Bradley doesn't love me and he doesn't deserve me, he deserves to find love without the money signs around it."

"I hope you signed a prenup, this one is going to leave you and take your trust fund with him before you know it."

At this Steven stood up, he was fuming at the accusation it was like when he first met WB and this misunderstanding that he was after the money. "I could care less about money, and Jackie knows it, if that was the case I would be all over my father to pay for the time he missed out on. That is not the type of man I am and Jackie knows that."

"Steven I think maybe it is time to go" Jackie stood up from her seat and turned to her mother that was taking in the view of Jackie's very pregnant body. "Goodbye Pam, you don't have the right of being a mother anymore, I know I will be a better mother than you ever was, because I already love this baby more than anything and I will just do the opposite of what you did to me growing up. This baby will never doubt his parent's love for him or each other. May you and Jack rot in hell."

With that they turned and Michael let them out the door. After they were gone he turned and looked at Pam, "you were the worse mother out there, I used to be young and dumb that you would hit on me when I was dating Jackie, and I know that you did the same thing to Steven, you never really cared about your daughter's happiness, I didn't realize it till after I had my own daughter, and now I know that I would do anything to keep her safe and happy, Jackie and Steven our her godparents and they would do the same for my daughter and they will do the same for their son when he is born. You gave birth to an amazing daughter, too bad you never really took the time to see that, she has more love than anyone that could come from the home life she did should have." The other guard came and took Pam out.

Jackie sat in the waiting room, it was uncomfortable waiting to see the doctor. The nurse called her back and Steven went with her, they could tell by the nurse's expression that something was up when she took her blood pressure. Jackie was changed into a gown and waiting for the doctor to come in.

"Hey Jackie how are you doing today?" the doctor asked as he entered the room.

"OK I guess just uncomfortable"

"Well that is to be expected. I am a little concerned about your blood pressure, so we are going to run some labs, in pains?" he asked as he felt around on her bump.

"Some but it's been a stressful day, but everything should be fine now."

"Ok, I am going to check and see if you have started to dilate any if you can put your feet up here, Mr. Barnett just make sure you stay at Jackie's head. This may feel a little discomfort"

Jackie was feeling a little more than a little discomfort while he checked her. Steven was just uncomfortable of the whole thing as someone had their hands down by Jackie's lady parts. But was too concerned over the what had been said about her blood pressure and more tests to bother saying anything.

"Jackie you are dilated to 3 centimeters, you may be going into early labor, but I really want to try and hold you off for a few more weeks. We may be admitting you and then full bed rest till you deliver if we can."

"I would stay in the hospital that long?"

"No we will admit you over night to see if we can stop the labor and then if that is successful send you home, but you will need full bed rest. Basically only getting up when you need to, and best if you are not left alone at home."

"How serious is this doc?" Steven finally found the words to speak.

"Well it would be best if the baby can develop more before delivery, and I want Jackie's blood pressure down before she delivers, that can cause issues for both of them, I am not going to lie. But I think we can get them both a few more weeks they will be better prepared. I just need to check the labs that should be back shortly and we will see what we are going to do from there." and the doctor left.

Jackie began to cry and Steven stood beside her and held her, "I shouldn't have gone today, it was too much"

"Babe honestly it could have happened if you kept it bottled up, you actually kept your cool today, a lot more than I did"

They stayed like that till the doctor came back in, "Well it looks like we are going to admit you, hopefully just overnight, give you something to stop the labor and help lower your blood pressure. They are going to work on you paperwork to admit you and will come get soon, they have a bed ready now. They will take and get you started on meds and I'll be by in a few hours to check on you."

Before they knew it Jackie was in her room. She hadn't stopped crying, since they said she was being admitted, "I am so scared Steven"

"I know, but they are going to do everything they can to take care of you and Reggie OK? I am going to see if Kitty is working, I need to go home and get your bag, but I am not going to leave you alone."

"Don't be long"

Steven stepped out of the room and walked over to the nurse's station, "Hey can you check and see if Kitty Foreman is working right now?"

One of the nurses looked at him, "You're her other son aren't you?"

"Yea, they just admitted my wife, and we really need her right now."

"I saw her earlier, so let me call over and get her up here, your wife is Jackie Barnett right?"

"Yes, if you can just send her to Jackie's room"

"Will do sweetie, I know Kitty is so excited to become a grandma"

Steven walked back and took a seat next to Jackie's bed, "They are going to page her and have her come in here, if she can stay with you I'll run home and get your things, I know I need to call dad and Angie, do you want me to call Brook?"

"Yea, what are we going to do about the store? Randy and Todd can't do it all"

"Well maybe Angie can come up and help and Laurie is going to work there when she comes home, I think that is this week or so. I'll call Fez too.

Kitty stepped in the room, "Jackie are you OK?" she ran over and took the girl in her arms.

"No I am scared"

"Sweetie they are going to do everything they can for you and the baby, you just relax and let us take care of you. I was just getting off so I am all yours"

"Could you stay with her while I run home, I am going to make some phone calls and get her some of her things, she had already packed a hospital bag so I'll grab it. Do you know if they are going to let me stay here with her, I really don't want to leave her?"

"Normally they don't but I can see about pulling some strings, but just tonight, don't expect it when the baby is born."

"When is Laurie coming home, do you know yet?"

"OH darn, that is tonight, I forgot to tell you guys to come over for dinner tonight, well we are just going to have to put it off, I am sure Laurie will understand, if we put if off a day or so."

"We won't be able to make it, the doctor is going to be putting Jackie on complete bed rest"

"Well we will just figure something out."

"I won't be long babe, just going to grab bags and make some calls. I love you"

"Love you" Jackie was starting to finally relax and calm down the medicine starting to work on at least making her sleepy.

Seeing her fall asleep, "Mrs Foreman" he motioned for her to the door, "Just keep an eye on her she had a bad nightmare a few nights ago, and I don't want this to trigger it. I am going straight home, I'll call dad and Red, I'll ask Red if he can call Fez and Michael, so I don't have to be gone too long. Laurie and I had talked about her working at Grooves when she got back in town, I hope she is still willing, I might need her help with the store, right away."

He went back and kissed his sleeping wife and hurried home, he didn't want to be gone long from her.