(One time for old times-sewerperson)

(Rewrote this chapter and ch 25.. I forgot to put that again)

KOUICHI'S POV

'Good morning sunshine!'

That's the message Takuya sent to me a few days ago and I still haven't even replied. I think about it religiously, although I don't know why it freaks me out so much. He hasn't sent me anymore, however. I felt guilty for not responding the first time, but I just didn't know what to say.

Sunshine? It may be a friendly nickname but it just seems unusual to me. Takuya had always been a bit eccentric but I've never gotten a nickname from him.. maybe I'm just thinking too hard about this. Maybe it doesn't mean anything at all. Maybe I should put it out of my mind once and for all.

I peeked out of the shower I stood in and the steam rolled out as I opened the curtain. I shook my wet bangs away from my eyes to see my brother had not been waiting in the bathroom. He has done it multiple times, but he hasn't the last two times. It convinced me I was credible and worthy; almost like he trusted me to be alone.

I tried to keep my arm out of the water to keep it from stinging. I wonder why such little pain would affect me that much when I purposely endured much more without hesitation. Thanks to the bandage Kouji has presented and rewrapped daily it was finally healing up correctly. I stepped out of the shower, slowly turning off the water and wrapping a towel around my body.

I stared into the mirror for the first time, attempting to see the attractive boy everyone else saw. I didn't understand, all I saw was a black mess of wet hair and dark eyes with no luster. My pale skin made those features seem extra dark. The only color I had was on my cheeks. It was the infinite blush that plagued me. Why was it I could turn red so easily? I get embarrassed so often, it's unpleasant.

Maybe my self-esteem wasn't too great to begin with but I'm no where near as captivating as Takuya or Kouji. At least Takuya had a bronze tan and lively hair, he seemed inviting and warm to everyone he came across. Kouji didn't smile often but when he did he almost seemed like a cunning, rogue prince. They had features to be proud of; not me.

I left some clothes on the bathroom counter for a reason. The idea of getting dressed in front of my brother made me feel panicked. I wouldn't show anyone my skin again, much less someone that cares so much about my well-being. Honestly, I couldn't remember the last time I even got dressed outside the bathroom, whether or not someone had been in the house with me.

I wore a thin, navy blue, long-sleeve button up shirt with the nicest pair of jeans I could find. I combed my hair, though still wet and shaggy. I even brushed my teeth two times from nervousness.

I'm ready.

I poked my head out of the crack of the bathroom door, spying my twin sitting lazily on the sofa. He held a mug to his face, sipping slowly and glancing at his phone. I made my way down the hallway, passing my mother's old room.

I hated it.

I sighed and tiptoed out to the living room nervous from the attention my brother would relentlessly give me. Kouji immediately looked me up and down. His elated smirk caused me to feel weak. He stood, grabbing the second mug placed on the table.

"Looking good," he teased, "..where you going? Have a date?"

"N-no! Just.. Job hunting.." I frowned at his assumption.

"Oh, yeah?" Kouji walked slowly but intimidatingly over to me, handing me the mug, "..you sure?"

"Yes, why?" I stared at his eyes, blinking in question.

I sipped the liquid, realizing it was a bitter black coffee.

This surprised me; he's never made coffee for me before.

"We can always go live in the woods," he charmingly spoke.

It wasn't a realistic solution, even I knew that.

I made a sour face, partially from the coffee but mostly because of his false idealism. He used his fingers to brush my wet hair behind my ear. Pink washed over my cheeks, I hate that it was so easy for him to do this to me.

"Your hair's still a mess."

I pouted profusely, "..I know."

"Alright. I'll escort you," Kouji chuckled, "..where are we going first?"

"..umm.. anywhere," I proclaimed sheepishly.

"Let's search around."

KOUJI'S POV

I took him for a stroll closer to town, though I made sure it had only been within an hour of walking distance. If he were to find a job miraculously I would want it to be as close as possible. Using the train or a taxi every day to get to work would be expensive. Kouichi had said before his mother used to do that but she also made a bit more money than a freshly graduated school student.

I didn't think too much about it however it still stuck in my head. Maybe I'm a little selfish but I don't know if I even want my brother to get a job in the first place. Why can't we just work from home? I wanted him here with me for every minute of the day. I knew it couldn't happen, realistically we needed money. Just by selling alone I was able to support myself just fine in that old house. I could do it again and just sell a little more since I have my twin. He would never allow it, though. Selling is almost a full time job and I was always staring at my phone and even had different cars pull up each day. Luckily, I lived more in rural area so I didn't have to worry about nosy neighbors.

We stopped at an antique store. Kouichi thought maybe this job wouldn't be too bad, socially. Plus, maybe they just needed help cleaning.

He didn't have luck.

I waited out front of every store he went in. I was nervous for him on the inside but my exterior seemed calm and nonchalant. My brother meandered back out the door shaking his head with a sorrowful look on his face. I had mixed emotions as I attempted to keep his head up, reminding him to be positive.

We went into a few more places; two restaurants and a sporting store. None of those places were hiring and Kouichi wasn't even a qualified chef for the one position the restaurant was looking to fill. Kouichi mentioned something about the restaurant interviewer saying my brother had too small of a frame to work in the dish pit. I wanted to laugh, but kept myself quiet. He seemed thoroughly discouraged and my goal was not to make him feel worse.

I saw him type something in his phone before swiftly shoving it down in his pants pocket. I didn't question him, the loss of encouragement I think had taken over him completely and turned him to hopelessness. Pessimism was apparent on his face as I tried resting my hand on his shoulder as a message of uplifting.

There was one last place I ushered him into and it was just a grocery store. The same one I had gotten the flowers from before. I didn't think much of it when I let him wander inside. I made my way to the corner of the wall of the building, the front doors were in my sight as I stood by and waited.

My phone buzzed in my pocket and I flipped it open expecting to see Junpei. I had messaged him this morning hoping for some kind of positive response. He must have been busy as work because he hadn't replied when I asked him about the job he had offered. Instead, Takuya had just messaged me. It was just a hey; a rather small greeting though I couldn't help but feel agitated.

What the hell could he want?...maybe I shouldn't act so spiteful .. we're friends. He's just being friendly..

Lately I've been so rude and cruel to everyone. I know Junpei had a point, but was it sensible?

Maybe.. I'm just not that brave, yet. If I could find a way to soothe my madness without spilling my heart to Kouichi that would be a miracle.

Kouichi suddenly came out of the grocery store's front door with a piece of paper. His face was flushed with color and his eyes were quite watery. Whatever happened inside that store must have upset him; seeing him this way irked me. I thought the worst as he brought me into a hug.

"What happened?" I asked as he wrapped his arms around my waist. My hands gripped his shoulders, obvious worry on my face.

"I got the job," Kouichi smiled, his eyes seemed to sparkle with tears of joy.

I exhaled, relieved that he was actually fine but irritated mentally knowing he was going to be gone for hours on days.

I'm happy for him.. I think..

"What position?" I questioned as he let go of his embrace.

"Stocker," he said happily, "..morning stocking.. um.. I think seven to one-ish?"

I grinned at his nervous response, "..seven? That's early. You don't get out of bed until noon."

Kouichi pouted, "..not anymore."

I patted him on the head, grinning lightly at him as his imaginary tail wagged bag and forth with self-satisfaction. His face was pink and twinkling. I couldn't help but feel soothed seeing him this animated.

We began home together, accompanying eachother with our favorable auras intertwined. He spoke of his new job and how excited but nervous he was to start. He loved the fact he wouldn't have to be dealing with strangers; just working in his lonesome and at a steady pace. I was delighted for him, but also miserable for myself knowing that I'd be extremely disheartened and melancholic at home. It's just me and my insanity surrounded by solitude. Without Kouichi, everywhere seemed dull and dreary like a prison.

He informed me that they had only a few shifts for him, though it reassured me knowing he wouldn't be gone for long. I know I'm just being selfish, but it seemed like good fortune.

My phone buzzed bringing me out of my thoughts. I got a reply confirming the job with Junpei, finally.

I'll take this job.. fine.. I'll just work the same hours as him.. this way I wouldn't go so insane at home, alone.. maybe it's selfish but this is confusing. I'm used to being alone but..

Realizing I care so much for someone is... exceedingly different.

I messaged my future boss, Junpei, asking about any details. He explained he would say more in person if I wished but it wasn't enough for me. I messaged him quickly asking to work the morning shift. My stomach fluttered when he replied I could work mornings like I had requested. Junpei also informed me I would eventually start, maybe next week. I wonder if he's trying to get rid of his lazy worker still.

'What are you doing the rest of the day?' Junpei texted, questioning me.

'Nothing really..' I replied.

Kouichi wasn't even paying attention to me messaging so much on my phone. I think his anxiety and excitement took over any consciousness he had.

He looks so enticing with that smile.

No matter how tangled up in his attractive smile I had been; I still felt uneasy. Takuya was still on my mind.. I felt angry.. but guilty.

KOUICHI'S POV

I sent a brisk message noticing my brother engrossed in his phone. Never mind my uncertainty about Takuya's use of nicknames. I have to put it out of my mind. I can't worry about everything and everyone all the time. It would be the death of me. I already spent so long avoiding messaging Takuya that I realized I had been in the wrong. He didn't do anything bad; I'm just sensitive.

I told Takuya about the job openings at the restaurant remembering he had said something about loving to cook. I also mentioned this wasn't a sure thing; I really didn't want to get his hopes up too high. However, he was so thrilled about it he said he would run over there and apply almost immediately. I know he wasn't necessarily qualified but maybe.. hopefully.. he would get the job. I wished him the best of luck, of course, I could feel his excitement through the messages on the phone.

I'm so nervous.. a job? My first.. It will help me, mentally, won't it? I know I have a lot of issues.. inside.. I know my head isn't right sometimes.. but if it does help me, I wonder.. will this help Kouji? He could get a job, too, and it would help him calm down! Yeah.. that's it. He has all this pent up anger probably from inactivity.. right?

I felt my phone vibrate. I had gotten another message. Takuya questioned me about my mentality. I guess he still thought about that night by the camp fire. I assured him I was fine, even if on the inside I wasn't actually. It wasn't like anyone could make the pain go away. It was a burden I had to bare by myself. Eventually I'll get used to it, I'm sure. Plus, I have Kouji if I get sad. He helps.

Now almost home, my phone vibrated violently in my hand multiple times. Kouji met my eyes as I answered my phone.

'Hi..'

'Hey, Kouichi!' Junpei greeted.

Kouji rolled his eyes, hearing Junpei's loud voice on the phone. I didn't understand why he acted the way he did, especially with our mutual friend.

'What are you doing right now?' Junpei asked.

'Walking home..' I grinned, '..but.. Junpei! I got a job!'

Kouji's face softened. He didn't look like he was wanted to say something, but do something instead. I turned my head to the side in question to him. Kouji shook his head.

Junpei spoke, '..congrats! We should celebrate!'

'Oh?' My eyebrows rose in confusion at both boys.

'Want to?' Junpei pressed.

'Y-yeah.. um.. what did you have in mind?'

'I don't know but just got off work so I'll come over now!'

"Just you," Kouji leaned over and spoke into my phone.

"Kouji, don't be rude," I whispered and scolded him with my eyes.

Kouji sighed and began to walk a few steps ahead of me.

'Don't worry, Kouji. It's just me,' Junpei laughed through the phone.

I smiled through my words though I felt bothered, 'I'll see you soon. Just walk in when you get here!'

'Okay, see you soon!'

I hung up the phone glancing at Kouji as he trudged in front of me. We were only a minute from the house, but it seemed longer considering how uncomfortable I felt at this moment. I frowned, pulling on his jacket as I skipped up to walk beside him.

"Kouji?" He wouldn't look at me as I spoke, "..did I do something wrong?"

"No," he replied coldly, but he felt warm walking next to me.

"You've been acting really weird lately.. even when we were camping."

"I'm sorry. I'm just being an asshole again," he exhaled roughly, now making his way through the grass of the yard.

He always says that..

I followed behind him silently. I still felt like I did something wrong through I didn't know what I had done to begin with. We walked through the front door silently. I had closed it reluctantly, watching my brother plop onto the couch. Normally he would hold the door for me and he would close it himself, I couldn't remember the last time he didn't do that exact thing.

Maybe it wasn't a big deal to anyone but me, but it did hurt.

KOUJI'S POV

Why am I so annoyed? Is it that I don't want Junpei here because he might say something to Kouichi about me getting a job? Would he say anything about me working the same morning hours as him? The way I'm acting is ridiculous but I'm so embarrassed just thinking Kouichi would think I'm pathetic. I just wanted to Takuya Kouichi's phone and hang up. Junpei wants to celebrate.. but it better be just him coming over.. I can't deal with multiple people right now. What does he want to do? Drink? I wouldn't mind, but I feel utterly annoyed. I don't know.. if I'm mentally capable of dealing with these emotions by myself and intoxicated.

But.. I have Kouichi. He's my medicine.

What do I do?

Now I'm sitting on the couch frustrated with myself for acting the way I have been. Kouichi feels this tension, I know. He just froze in the door way. I still feel guilty.

I was about to speak up before my brother suddenly started to trot down the hallway. My eyes followed him as he disappeared into the darkness down the hall. I winced hearing the familiar creek of his door swing open.

Sorry I'm such a jerk, Kouichi. You're the last person I want to be like this to..

He came out the hallway holding Mori, a gentle grin on his face. He settled next to me and pushed the stuffed animal on my lap.

"What?" I muttered, confusion obvious in my voice.

"When I get sad I hold Mori," he admitted sheepishly, "..I think you need him right now.."

Actually, I think I need liquor right now. Something. Or.. someone.

I smirked unwilling to show any sadness, "..thanks.. but no thanks.."

"Why?" Kouichi frowned.

"I'd rather have you," I said. There it was; word vomit.

Why did I say that? I can't even begin to describe this how awkward I felt now. Damn.

Kouichi turned the brightest of all the colors, "..oh.."

I felt my own face begin to redden.

Why do I say these stupid things? I'm such an idiot.

"Well.. y-you do have me," my twin stated, his flushed face but genuine eyes never fading.

I felt my heart skip. What did he say?

"You have m-my attention, I mean. I'm all ears," Kouichi smiled nervously, wiggling Mori's ears, "..um.. w-what's wrong?"

My face felt sunburned.

"Nothing," I sighed feeling my heart begin to pound. He could hear my heart pulsating irregularly with intimacy, I don't doubt it.

"Tell me," he pleaded, using his big and sparkling eyes to his advantage.

Those eyes.. could kill.. he knows what he's doing, doesn't he?

"I just.."

Kouichi's imaginary dog ears perked upwards hearing my sentence beginning.

"..wish.."

"Hm?" Kouichi leaned closer.

"..I could.." I glared lowly at the floor, "..I don't know."

"Just tell me," Kouichi frowned, hugging the stuffed animal, "..please?"

Fine.

"I just wish I could buy you drinks or whatever to celebrate," I blurted, "..Like Junpei probably will."

My face had been so hot I felt like it would melt off, though I didn't dare to look in my brother's direction. I heard Kouichi giggle and it irked me.

"What?" I slightly turned to him, glowering.

"I don't need you to buy me anything.." He beamed, "..being here with you is already m-more than enough."

The both of us became silent and scorched from embarrassment as we stared at one another.

What does he mean? Wait, does he even know what he's saying to me? Is how I'm taking it okay? Maybe it's nothing. But his face is red for a reason, right?

I hate guessing games.

The front door swung open, Junpei stepped in and waved to us, "..hi~!"

My brother and I both red in the face wore a bewildered expression. Kouichi waved back, his colored cheeks deepening as I looked away and stood to my feet.

"Oh, was I interrupting something?" Junpei questioned, grinning teasingly.

"No," I mumbled, scowling at the floor and hiding my face. I felt my throat tighten.

"Kouji?" My twin muttered, gently placing his hand on my shoulder. That spot he touched began to burn. I growled under my breath.

"My stomach hurts. Just give me a minute," I swallowed hard, trudging to the bathroom.

I felt both their eyes on me as I shut the door. I locked the door, wishing I could lock away whatever feelings I had as well. I loathed feeling this way. I slid down the door and settled on the floor, knuckles white from the harsh grip I held on my knees.

Junpei brought a bottle. Half of me was relieved to see something that could possibly help my attitude, the other half of me was disappointed in not being able to congratulate my twin with something celebratory. I don't really know why I so envious. I guess I wanted to be that one person.. to give him something.

I wanted to drink in commemoration with them but I didn't; only for fear of what I would do in an inebriated state like before. I wished to be alone but I also longed to be with Kouichi. He made me feel calm yet here I am, anxious and disturbed. Maybe it wasn't Junpei being here that made me feel this way, maybe it was my own brother.

I don't know anymore.

I don't know if I was glad Junpei showed up when he did or if I'm angry at him. I just want Kouichi to know my feelings without me having to embarrassingly admit anything. Any time I slip up and say something remotely close; something blocks me, whether it's someone else or just me. It's like Junpei said, if I keep quiet I'll drive myself insane with emotions. I can't but but think if I say something there's a possibility he will begin to hate me. Something deep inside me doesn't think that, but the last thing I wanted to do was cause him to feel uncomfortable around me.

This is how I should be right now, right? I can freak out in the bathroom freely with some lame excuse and I know my brother is safe with our mutual friend. Is that selfish? I didn't know anymore.

Maybe I need to drink, I don't want to be sober anymore. I need to be wasted and passed out, that is what will help me right now. I also just need Kouichi.. to just know these damned things.. that I'm going insane here in my thoughts. Maybe back then when I couldn't decipher my feelings it was easier, just to take out the bad feelings I had on other people. Now I recognized them thanks to Junpei and I'm just taking it out on myself. Kouichi's not stupid, he knows there's an internal battle. I feel like the longer I stay in here the more I'll worry him. What excuse would I have for him this time? I'm angry with him for not giving me honesty one hundred percent of the time but I just do the same anyway.

I just want Kouichi around, I keep saying it, I know. But he makes this stupid feeling of loneliness and rage subside. I can't help but feel I'm not good enough anymore to be around him. What good do I do for him like he does for me?

I never thought about it so hard before. I always thought just because he was my twin that we deserved each others presence. It's not the case, not really.. not anymore. The words he said.. back then.. they create deep wounds and they embed in me permanently. I can't help those words stick with me.

Am I the only one he trusts? No. He has other friends, doesn't he? If he's scared of me he could become closer with others now? I hate this. I despise this.

There's a time and a place to do these things like confess and I had no idea when or where. At this rate it's truly a shame. I thought we could make it through this but this game he doesn't know he has been playing.. is killing me and I'm too low on energy..

I keep thinking this but I just wish Kouichi knew so I wouldn't have to voice anything. It's like I'm throwing feathers in a wishing well and they haven't even reached the water yet. I thought I could be brave enough.. tell him.. he would return my emotions and..

.. I thought we would go together.. but I guess I can go fuck myself.

KOUICHI'S POV

"I hope Kouji's okay.." I muttered, glancing at the closed bathroom door.

"He's human, too. He has stomach troubles just like everyone else," Junpei reassured.

"Yeah.."

"So.. what was that earlier?" He unscrewed the bottle and held it in his lap.

"W-what?" I fumbled with my sleeves nervously as Junpei's expression became more serious.

"You know what I'm talking about. When I walked in.." he spoke as he eyed me with examination.

I didn't dare to speak. It felt unrealistically uncomfortable. It seemed like I was getting interrogated over something I didn't realize I had been so flustered about to begin with.

"You both were red.. and I never see Kouji that way," he said suspiciously.

"N-nothing happened," I mumbled.

"Sure.." Junpei rolled his eyes playfully.

"I'm serious," I frowned at him.

He spoke whispers, "..it's nothing, yet it's obviously something.. at least to Kouji."

What?

"Junpei.. y-you're not making sense."

"You'll understand eventually," he chuckled.

I frowned, "..understand what?"

"Your feelings."

I felt my face on fire, "..w-what?"

"Sorry. I shouldn't pry. You both are like my younger brothers so.." Junpei laughed. He paused for a moment before speaking once more, "..so.. excited about your new job?"

I wasn't sure if I despised the fact he changed the subject or felt thankful. I didn't even have time to react, before I could open my mouth to reply Kouji came out of the bathroom. The flush on his face had left and had been replaced with some kind of annoyance.

He studied me for a minute, I think maybe because my facial expression screamed uneasiness. I scooted closer to Junpei as Kouji sat next to me.

"Feeling better, Kouji?" Junpei smirked.

Kouji barely nodded a reply.

Junpei didn't realize.. or did he? What he says resonates with me all too much right now. What does he mean? What means something Kouji.. I'm confused.. so confused.. I'll understand eventually.. what is this riddle? I'm not a student being quizzed.. I wish I just knew. I wish he could just tell me.

Maybe..

"Let's celebrate!" Junpei exclaimed, handing the bottle to me, "..congrats!"

"Thanks," I muttered, sipping a bit as I held back a sigh.

"Excited?" Junpei spoke, nudging my arm, "..new job, hm?"

I nodded, "..y-yeah.."

Kouji glanced at me, he knew I felt awkward. Maybe he did, as well. I wondered what else he felt, though. Obviously I was missing something; Junpei made it clear.

"Well.. don't keep secrets!" Junpei grinned.

Kouji looked nauseous at his statement.

I questioned, "..secrets?"

"Job details, please!" Junpei sighed, "..you don't seem excited."

I'm sorry.. I'm worried about something else right now..

"Just morning stocking at the grocery store.." I started, "..few hours a week though.. but I'm grateful."

"Mornings?" Junpei smiled deviously at Kouji though I wasn't sure why.

"Yeah.." I paused anxiously, "..I think it will be nice.. to not have a very social job."

"I agree! It's unlike mine, I'm so tired of people!" Junpei laughed.

I gave the bottle to my twin. Kouji frowned and chugged. I had a feeling Junpei had made him feel uneasy.

Or maybe it's just me?

•••

Today is the day.

It's the first day of my job, yet here I am unprepared and scurrying to get my work clothes without waking my twin. Somehow I had woken up late. At this rate I would be almost an hour late. Half of me wanted to stay home, as if I already knew I would get fired immediately.

I should save myself the embarrassment right?

The other half of me didn't want to give up, the lost optimism I had years ago had reappeared just in time to magically force me to quickly get dressed and leave. I threw on a long sleeve as hastily as I could before stumbling to get my shoes on.

As soon as I shut the front door, and as quietly as possible, I practically ran to work. My heart practically beat out of my chest. Being so early in the morning it didn't feel hot outside, though I was still sweating. When I stepped through the doors of the store the boss hung out his office door waving me over to him. I gulped, knowing the worst could possibly make its appearance now.

"Mr. Kimura," he began with an intimidating tone, "..late on your first day?"

For some reason I expected the person that had interviewed me to be the boss but it wasn't the case. This man was elderly, scruffier and superior.. and unnerving.

"I'm so sorry," I apologized slightly bowing. I stopped my body from trembling, I felt so highly strung.

"Don't let it happen again," he finalized.

He handed me a work vest and instructed me to put it on over what shirt I was wearing. It seemed to be a casual dress code. He described the job and said I would start in the cooler department. The basics; rotate and put any expired or moldy food out into a waste box. My job wasn't interactive, unless a customer needed direction.

He lead me out the door where someone had been waiting. The new man I saw wore a collared shirt that seemed authoritative. He was devilishly handsome and had gelled-back, dark hair and piercing eyes. His tall and stocky stature made him seem extra domineering. The way he studied me with his eyes made me want to hide.

"The supervisor will direct you from here," the boss nodded his head at the other man before disappearing into his office.

I gulped lightly as I bowed at the man.

"Katsu Mori," he began, his voice as deep as the ocean floor, "..please call me Katsu. No need for formality."

Mori? .. THAT'S.. well, I can't tell him that's my stuffed animal's name.. that's going to make me seem utterly weird to him..

"Kouichi? Can I call you that?" He spoke once more before I could reply the first time.

I nodded in hasty approval, the nervousness I felt made me feel sick. He grinned and I could feel my stomach do a flip. If the situation didn't make me feel nauseous, his abrupt sinister yet charming smile did.

"You don't talk much, do you?" He smirked, "..that's fine. Just follow me."

I trailed behind him disappointed in myself for not being able to speak. I know strangers made me anxious but this was ridiculous. Something had been off about this situation and I wasn't sure what had made me think this way.

He showed me a room in the back full of boxes and instructed me to grab only the ones from the back left corner. He told me to only worry about those, apparently they need to be in the certain cooler aisle by the end of the week. He helped me carry a few boxes in the aisle before giving me one last look. I was unsure of what he was thinking though I know he made me feel uncomfortable.

"It's easy. Don't be nervous," he attempted a genuine grin, though he came off as dominating.

I nodded lightly. My cheeks turned pink as his hand floated to my head and very light messed into my hair. I swallowed, darting my eyes to the ground, unwilling to meet his subduing gaze.

"I'll be around," he whispered intimidatingly as he walked away. Maybe he didn't mean to sound like that but he did.

I felt my heart drop to the floor and I couldn't breathe. Luckily no one was around in the aisle so no one saw my face turn into sudden flames.