"Hey, can you give me Cartman's number?" He asked Stan the next day. He thought that Erica wanted her purse back as soon as possible. Didn't look cheap, but his knowledge of such things was also limited. It's strange. The whole time she was holding the object in her hand. Or not? He wasn't really paying attention to it.
"Hm, what? Why?" His buddy didn't sound quite awake, but the clock was already past ten in the morning.
"She had forgotten her handbag last night." He added, because he had forgot for a short time that nobody else noticed what was going on with Erica in the parking lot yesterday.
"In the hall? But we checked everything before we left."
"No, she forgot it with me."
"Excuse me. Have I missed something?" Now there was more life in Stan.
"No, not like that." For a moment he wondered inwardly what was implied here at all.
"Erica .. Cartman's car gave her problems and so I accompanied her to the bus stop." Kyle just kept talking to get rid of this confusing thought. He also knew that Cartman was just a name, but every time he said her last name he thought of the stupid boy from the past, not the nice looking woman of today. Erica was a better fit.
"That was nice, but you didn't have to do that." He got a slightly sighing comment from the one on the line.
"What? Why?" Kyle asked a little confused. After all, their little conversation wasn't as bad as he thought it going to be before.
"Wasn't it difficult or something?" He got a counter question and well, actually he didn't make it uncomplicated either.
"No, actually it was all right." Except for a few small things, but Stan didn't need to know everything if it just provoked unnecessary discussions.
"All evening she practically stared holes into you as if she were about to attack you and then you just talk normally?" So the redhead wasn't just imagining it.
"Yes, we talked about it and settled a few things, I think." But now that this was going through his head, he noticed something else.
"Tell me, Stan, what did she tell Kenny and you?" Sooner or later the subject will come up again anyway and he didn't want Erica to serve up anything else to the boys. He didn't know how much Cartman from before was in her now.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, why I didn't want to have anything to do with her for years."
"You are wondering that now?! Did you talk about it and she didn't explode? It was never discussed in detail before Kenny or me, but we didn't find out until much later that you had turned her down. Must have been tough for her and if I had found out sooner, things might have turned out a little differently because Kenny and I would have given you some sense too. I mean, I understand that you can't reciprocate these feelings, but that as a friend you completely abandoned her, which hit her a lot more. At the time, I actually thought that your relationship would finally be better because you studied and attended courses together." Kyle would be very good at lying to himself if he said now it wasn't true. In addition, his old selfishness is now making him feel sick. Because he thought of himself the whole time. About what people might think of him and spread rumors about his life. He didn't waste a single thought on Erica.
"You know, just because she had a crush on you, she wouldn't have jumped you against your will. The whole thing was a bit shit of you too. But when we finally got behind it, she asked us not to say anything to you, because that all would have been cleared up. Apparently that didn't seem to have been the full truth, because whenever I mentioned you she made that one face fleetingly. A mixture of annoyed and something else. That's why I thought it would be better never to leave you alone with her. Which never happened anyway, because you went for living like a hermit crab. But when I said stuff about your successes, it was a bit like she was happy for you too." Hearing that from one of his best friends after all this time made him feel guilty again. But unfortunately he just couldn't change the past.
"I'm really sorry about what happened. Sounds like a stupid excuse, but I was just young and stupid. Maybe it's better if you bring the purse back to her." Yesterday's conversation was certainly not easy for Erica, because he also tore open old wounds, so he didn't want to cause any more damage and be seen again.
"Is there something important in there? Maybe she left her phone in there."
"I'm not looking in there!" It felt like he was invading her privacy.
"Kyle, this is just a bag. It won't bite you." That was said jokingly to him and he rolled his eyes over it, because he just didn't like that.
"But beware of the feminine hygiene products. I heard they can smell fear." Now Stan was getting really ridiculous.
"You are really a help here. I'll just bring the thing over to you later." With that he hung up and could actually go to Stan immediately, but he gave the man a little more time to wake up properly. If he was ever here, he wanted to hang out with his buddy. In any case, he hoped that this had the time. Actually, he could have asked that beforehand, but he believed that he felt even shitty after the class reunion and would run away immediately. It didn't go as bad as expected.
The last part to the bus stop could have gone better, a voice whispered in the back of his head. Kyle's eyes drifted to the forgotten handbag in the car. He didn't want to hang around with his parents at home all the time, so he sat in the car until he thought of what else to do before he left. For his mother he stayed until tomorrow because he was supposed to help her redecorate the living room. The answer, to kill his time, was in the passenger seat. But even if he found out where Erica lived now, just driving by, it seemed strange to him. No, that didn't come across as good when the guy who broke her heart ages ago and suppressed her as a friend suddenly lounged around in front of the door. His old college love crossed his mind because it was the only one where he could say it had been feeling like a heartbreak. Otherwise he willingly parted ways with his partners because they both came to the conclusion that it was no longer any good. Oh, what old stories he dug out in his brain, because he could hardly compare his pain with that of Erica. After what Stan mentioned earlier, his guilt didn't diminish. He felt a little like he had to do something for her. But how, without being obtrusive?
On the side he actually googled whether transwomen really needed hygiene articles in this direction, because he knew nothing about this field and how far the research was there today. But apparently having a uterus implanted didn't really work. He didn't think Erica wanted that either. His ex-girlfriend, when she was on her period, sometimes just lay around for a whole week if she wasn't working. Funnily enough, he liked this time now and then. Just to take care of her. Loitering on the couch together like there wasn't anyone else out there. How you could be mistaken about someone like that, but surely she was also driven away by his rough manner after the accident.
What kind of topics was he pondering here, because he shouldn't really care. He could drive to the parking lot and see if her car was still there. And then what? Wait until someone tows it and follow the service to the workshop, because Erica will definitely not pick it up herself. Putting the bag in the hand of a stranger was stupid too. Actually, he couldn't care less about the accessory, but his worries of conscience ordered him to bring the thing back safely, so that he could at least do that for her before he disappeared from her life again.
Someone knocked on the car door window and he jerked his head around. It was his mother and so he lowered the window.
"If you're already hanging around out here, you can mow the lawn." She said nicely, almost humming. Apparently she was in a good mood today. Nice for her, he thought, but it didn't infect and bother him. Another reason why he was out here.
"Yes, I will." So he wanted to put the window back up, but his mother discovered something else.
"Where does this great purse come from? So did you meet someone nice yesterday? You see, events like this are not just a waste of time." She told pleased and cheerful. To which he sighed a little annoyed, like a teenager, because he was being reminded of that time.
"I have not .." Of course, he wasn't just allowed to finish speaking when his mother was dogged in something.
"Do I know her?"
"No, it is .."
"Him?" Well, he never really wanted to chew on this matter with her again.
"Mum!" He said a little more clearly and louder so that she knew that this was his limit.
"What? I don't live behind the moon like your father and you know, I personally have nothing against adopted grandchildren." She chattered on happily, as if he would like to sign the papers for it next week. Actually, he never really considered whether he was a candidate for the role of father. For that he would have to hold a woman by his side long enough. Well, sooner or later something will happen again in the dating zone.
"Oh, Erica just forgot her bag. Nothing else. I'll bring it back later."
"Erica? Give her greetings from me. Haven't seen her in a while. Oh, when you're young ..." He let his mother gossiping, wondering why he even mentioned her name while he was looking for the lawnmower in the garage.
"... and then she turned out so pretty. No wonder that she's also modeling. Hm, to have that age again." She raved when he finally found the device and stepped back to the lawn.
"Enough now. I think I can mow the grass on my own." With that he put plugs in his ears so he could listen to music while he did this gardening job. But Kyle had to admit that his mother was somehow right about Erica. She got really pretty. But he should stop thinking about her or like that, because he had no intention of seeing her again. Tomorrow he'll be going back to his apartment anyway and to his usual everyday stress.
"By the way, can you take care of the house next week?" His mother suddenly yelled at him from behind, that he almost got a heart attack. While calming down, he refrained from explaining again that he could still hear her at normal volume of her voice. Even in his school days she hadn't understood this thing.
"Why can't Ike do this? Besides, you have a new security system." After all, his brother can also take care of such things, because this still went more often to their parents.
"Your father lost the password 'spontaneously' and is too proud to really admit it. Now we can't activate the thing until it occurs to him again just as 'spontaneously'." His mother put quotation marks in the air next to certain words. But what should he say about it, because his old man was stubborn and didn't get any smarter over the years.
"All right." So he agreed, because there wasn't really a reason to say no. Also he rarely had to work on weekends during the warmer months of the year.
"I knew that I could rely on you." With that his mother stepped back in joyously. Sometimes he really wondered where she got the good mood at that age.
"You can invite your friends." He heard her calling from inside. Although he didn't think Stan really wanted to do something like that, it was well known that asking once did not cost anything. In addition, he could still spend the weekend during the day with the book that he finally wanted to read. Lately he has so seldom got around to calming down with a book. At his parents' house, nobody could really annoy him about his work. At least not at the front door.
"Of course." He gave another satisfactory answer to his mother.
"But no loud house parties!" She added in a serious and also jokingly way.
"Definitely not gonna happen." He did this as seldom as possible as a teenager, because firstly, as a host, he had to tidy up most of the things after it and secondly, so much always got broken because some idiots cannot look out for other people's property.
That with the lawn was done faster than expected. If you were still lost in thought by the way, he was astonished that he did not run over individual stones. The device was quickly put away and again he didn't know what to do with himself. Without wanting to, he thought back to yesterday's conversation with Erica. Or rather this morning. It's been wandering back into his head the whole time. Perhaps that was why he couldn't sleep properly because he was always wondering whether he was really saying the right thing. Actually he really wanted to leave it at this one conversation, but somehow he still wanted to know whether his words had really got through. What if he made her angry and she didn't show it because she didn't want to wait for the bus alone? All these years he suppressed this matter and now it did not let go of him. Surely it was just because he was still in this place.
"Hey Kyle." Suddenly someone called for him, but not yelling like his mother. So he took out the headphones and turned in the direction of where the voice was coming from.
"Oh, hey Heidi." He also greeted the woman when he realized who it was. Apparently she was jogging down the street, judging by the tracksuit. Hopefully she didn't ask if he was going for a lap. He liked to go through his program to stay fit on his own in order to really relax. But that didn't really work by his parents, because being here alone again tensed his body somehow and so he only did what was absolutely necessary.
"Nice that you are still here. Are you staying any longer? I didn't want to push myself on you like that last night because you seemed somehow distracted." She explained in a friendly manner, apparently trying to regain control of her breathing.
"To put it nicely, that I vomited. I guess I'm getting a sensitive stomach. Be that as it may, I'll be here until tomorrow before I disappear again." He didn't even look at her, but instead watched four children a few houses away who were building something like a wall with chairs and garden tools in the front yard. It reminded him a little of his childhood.
"OK. Do you still have time tonight? We could chat a little more than yesterday. Was a little full to talk carelessly." That made the taller one's attention wander back to Heidi. Was she just inquiring about a date with him? Oh nonsense, he interpreted too much into it. Still, he couldn't remember anyone mentioning whether she was in a relationship.
"Just the two of us?" The question seemed a bit stupid, but he couldn't think of anything better to say.
"If you want. We can also do something with Stan and Wendy if they both feel like it." That sounds kind of like a double date, he thought to himself and tried to shake it off.
"It's fine with me." He agreed, because it was still better than sitting around with his parents and his mother said he should do more with his friends. A little distraction was probably good for him.
"Great. I'll pick you up around 8 o'clock." With that she ran delighted on without explaining to him where it was going and who was taking care of the other two. For a moment he wondered if she was interested in him more after all. Hopefully she didn't think he was someone to pull off a one night stand with. He's already tried that, but the anonymous stuff about this and without any feelings, it was not his thing. He also couldn't remember mentioning his single life to her. Surely she heard it from the others, whereby he found that Stan wasn't chatting about everything. But now he agreed to the meeting and should go through with it. If things got strange, he could still walk off.
And Heidi will surely take care of the other two, he said to himself, because she used to be very reliable. At least he remembered her fondly, even though he didn't have that much to do with her towards the end of high school.
The redhead found that he was staring into nothing out here enough for now, racking his brain over probably nothing. So he went into the house for another snack and some work-related things. Although he promised himself that he would not do anything until Monday in order to be more focused on the matter here, but the class reunion took place yesterday and so what he came for was over. Besides, he wasn't getting any brain-draining tasks that month. Which was probably also due to the summer.