Chapter 2: Seasons: Autumn Moon
Xena strapped her bedroll across Argo's back and pulled her cold weather cloak from her saddlebags. Autumn had crept up on her and had brought with it a bite to the morning air. She hated wearing the heavier fabric. It was rough against her skin and it smelled faintly of her own body odor. Xena silently cursed herself for the umpteenth time for agreeing to take the overland trail to Potidea. If they had traveled by sea, as Xena preferred, not only would they have already made port, but they would have avoided the frosty mornings and chilly evenings. But no! Gabrielle had wanted to see the fall foliage and skirting around the Aegean wouldn't allow her to do that.
Guilt had played its part in Xena's acquiescence to the ridiculous request to extend their journey by weeks. Xena had still not told her companion about her little tryst with Ares two months prior when they had taken refuge from a summer storm in one of his abandoned temples. The scene had replayed itself in her head a thousand times and even though she had been on the brink of telling the bard every time the images came uninvited to her mind, shame prevented her from confiding in her best friend and partner.
The secret had already started to wreak havoc on the women's sex life. Every time Gabrielle reached for her in the night, Xena had turned away. It felt wrong to make love to Gabrielle without telling her the truth. It wasn't because they were monogamous, but Xena knew of Gabrielle's low opinion of Ares and felt like Gabrielle deserved full disclosure before they coupled again. But Gabrielle had been persistent in her attempts, so Xena had tried to give her the intimacy she craved. When the bard had started kissing and touching her, Xena had closed her eyes and attempted to relax into it. Unfortunately, when she shut her lids Ares was there on the other side of them like a stain. So, she had kept her eyes open as Gabrielle's tongue slid down her belly toward her center. As she struggled to reach climax, Ares' words taunted her, telling her that she didn't want "nice." What plagued Xena the most was that he was right and she hated him for it. It wasn't that what she and Gabrielle had wasn't enjoyable, it was that it just didn't compare to the passion he sparked in her. In fact, she imagined that if she had never known what it could be like with him, she could probably have spent her entire life with Gabrielle in complete and utter bliss. But, knowing him, feeling him, kissing him, fucking him, meant that whomever she chose to be with would be nothing more than contentment.
Oh, Xena had known when she left him all those years ago that she was dooming herself to such a fate but she had been certain in her conviction at the time that she'd be able to resist him forever. She'd told herself that the euphoric feeling of doing good deeds could replace the high she felt when she was with him. Xena had promised herself that she'd never give in, because she knew exactly what the consequences would be. And, here she was suffering those consequences now. Ares had consumed most of her thoughts on her trek from Pylos to Potidea. She itched for him. At times, she could almost feel his presence with her even though he hadn't dared show his beautifully smug face.
The need to pass water mercifully brought Xena out of her own head. She tossed a couple small logs onto their previous evening's still smoldering campfire so they'd have some fresh coals to make breakfast then walked a few meters beyond their camp to relieve herself. Gabrielle was still snoring when Xena finished her business so Xena headed down to the lake to freshen up. The sun had yet to crest the eastern ridge but the sky above was light enough to make out the buttery yellow of the leaves that had come to rest atop the water. The scene was the picture of perfect calm, the exact opposite of Xena's frayed nerves. She scooped her hands into the water, sending ripples across the lake, disturbing the tranquility. It was cold, as cold as the words she and Ares had flung at each other that night in the temple. Xena sloshed the water onto her face and rubbed her cheeks vigorously. Trying to clean it all away. Her face, her memories, her longing.
An unusually chipper bard came bounding down the shore. "Morning, Xena, did you sleep well? I slept like a log!"
Seriously, Xena thought, how did anyone wake up so eager to take on the world? "Not so much," Xena answered. And, there it was, another opportunity to tell her best friend why she tossed and turned during the night. Why her dreams were filled with images of the God of War mounting her and claiming her as his own.
"Maybe when we get to Potidea, you should go get a massage or something, you seem very tense lately. Of course, if you'd let me, I could relieve some of that stress." Gabrielle reached up and caressed Xena's damp cheek then planted a delicate kiss on the warrior's lips. Xena forced herself into the kiss and wrapped her arms around Gabrielle's torso. 'Ares be damned,' she thought and hoisted Gabrielle up and carried her back to camp. Xena was glad to find that the bard hadn't put away her own bedroll yet. Xena laid her down and without a word, lifted the bard's skirt.
"Ahhh, finally!" Gabrielle spread her legs willingly and waited for Xena to descend on her.
After a few beats, Xena looked at her lover and said," Tell me what to do."
"What?" Gabrielle stared in confusion at the mottled canopy above her. "You know what to do. You're the one who taught me, remember?"
"I know that, but this one time let's pretend I didn't. I want you to make me do it, order me to eat you," Xena pleaded.
"Xena, what's gotten into you?" Gabrielle rose up on her elbows and asked but when she saw Xena pulling away, she decided she'd give it a shot, "Okay. . .Get down there, get down there you hot babe and do me."
Xena had to give her friend credit for trying but it just wasn't the same. Having to tell someone to dominate you just wasn't the same as being dominated. Xena shrugged and sat down wordlessly on the end of Gabrielle's bedroll.
"Xena, what's wrong with you? Are you upset with me about something? Is this because we didn't take a ship? Are you trying to punish me?"
'No, Gabrielle, it's nothing like that." How did she tell her friend that her mental anguish had nothing to do with the bard's actions but her own?
"Well, what's it like?" Gabrielle sat up and smoothed her skirt down.
"Nothing!" Xena jumped up and sprinted off.
Gabrielle knew that Xena often ran to clear her head, She also knew it would be at least an hour before she made her way back to camp. Once Xena had disappeared over the ridge, Gabrielle laid her head back and did what she'd been doing a lot of lately, took care of her own needs.
AXAXAXAXAXAXAXAXAX
Aphrodite was beginning to worry about Ares, he'd been conspicuously absent from her orgies for the past few weeks. It wasn't like him to miss out on all the fun. Even when he didn't partake sexually, he usually showed up and enjoyed a drink or two. The God of War had been missing in action on Olympus, as well! When he failed to show up at Apollo's birthday party, Aphrodite wrote it off as bad blood between rivaling brothers, but when he had blown off two months worth of Council meetings, the love goddess decided it was high time that she paid the war god a visit.
Aphrodite materialized in a shower of pink rose petals in the main chamber of the Halls of War. As she expected, she found him brooding on his throne. "Missed you last night, Bro," she grinned lasciviously. "That dark bitch of yours, Enyo, showed up with two chained gladiators and whoa was she feisty! You would've had a good time."
"Maybe," Ares answered dismissively. He was not in the mood for Aphrodite. The smell of love on her only reminded him of the love he'd never have.
"Okay what's up?" Aphrodite sat on his lap and ran her fingers through his hair.
"Why does something have to be up?"
Aphrodite could see the raw pain in his eyes and knew that whatever it was that it had to do with Xena. Dite ran her fingers from his hair down to his lips. She plucked the thick bottom lip between her thumb and forefinger. "The warrior babe?"
"She has a fucking name." Ares tossed Aphrodite off his lap.
"Whoa, I just got this dress!"
"To Tartarus with your fucking clothes. Shove off, I don't want company."
"What did you do? I am sure it's not as bad as you think. She loves you, you know." Aphrodite shimmied and the fabric of her dress returned to uncreased perfection.
"Love," he snickered. "Love," he repeated and let loose a laugh so darkly sinister that it gave the goddess chills. Aphrodite was afraid to answer. She hadn't seen him in such a dark mood since Xena had left him for Hercules. When she'd walked away, he'd been so pissed that he'd pushed the Thessalians and Mitoans to civil war as a salve to his wounded pride.
"You know, I am fucking kidding myself. She doesn't love me. Oh, I love her! I would give up my life for her. Hades, I practically did! I lived as a pathetic, stinking mortal for over a year because of my love for her. But she. . .she doesn't love me. The only thing she wants from me is some cock and some conquest. Some good hard-fucking and furious fighting. That's all I am to her, the God of Fucking War! She wants the power, she never wanted me! As soon as she lost her lust for War, it was goodbye, Ares!"
"Okay, you need to calm down. She does love you. I am the goddess of Love, you think I'd know a thing or two about it. I mean after all, why would she get your godhood back for you if she didn't love you."
"Because, you idiot bimbo, that's what turns her on. As a mortal I didn't do anything for her. As the glorious God of War, however, I excite her! She's turned on by the passion, the power, the violence, the danger. The bitch has had me where she wants me all these years."
"Ares. . ."
"Nooooo," he yelled, "you don't get it. When I was mortal, I slept in bed beside her, sure the blonde do-gooder cunt was there. . . but Xena . . .she was able to control herself with me. But as soon as I get my godhood back and put my hands on her she's all FIRE again. I touch her and she melts into my power."
"Why don't you back up and tell me what happened," Aphrodite suggested.
Ares shifted in his throne and tried to calm himself. Losing his shit over a woman was not a good look. "Couple months back, I found her holed up in one of my temples waiting out a storm. I went there and made some snide comment. Next thing you know, I'm fucking her on my altar like its thirty-five years ago!"
"Have you talked to her?" Aphrodite knew that Xena was probably somewhere out there dealing with the same feelings as Ares. The two of them could shoot a bumblebee out of the air from fifty meters but they couldn't have a simple, honest, cordial conversation that lasted more than fifty seconds.
"No, she told me to get lost, I tried to tell her that I love her but she didn't want to hear it. By the gods, Dite, all I wanted to do after we fucked was pull her into my arms, hold her and kiss her. But she was having none of it. And, the thing is, I knew exactly what she was doing when she taunted me. She goaded me into fucking her like that so that she could hate me even more. And, she does, I saw it in her eyes. She fucking hates me.:
"Well, that's a good thing." Aphrodite grinned. Ares looked at her like she had grown a third nipple.
"You really don't get it!" The goddess rolled her eyes. "It's basic love stuff, Bro! Love 101! Hate isn't the opposite of love. Ares, hate is an integral part of love. You can only hate someone that you care about. Apathy is the opposite of love. If she's upset with you, it's because she does feel for you. Maybe she hasn't processed it, likely she's afraid to dwell on her feelings for you, but she loves you whether she likes it or not."
Ares mulled it over. As much as he hated to admit it, the goddess made sense, sometimes. "So what should I do?"
"You should go to her."
"But, she said that she never wanted me to . . ."
"One: she doesn't mean that. Two: You need to apologize. Three: You have to let her know that you are calling a stalemate." Aphrodite often spoke of love in terms of war so he'd better understand them. "Tell her the next move is hers and remind her that you love her even if she won't let herself love you."
"I'll think about it," he promised.
"Don't think too hard! Are you coming to my orgy or not? It's not the same without you."
"I think I am all orgied out, Sis." Ares said but was surprised to find that he actually meant it.
"Suit yourself." Aphrodite disappeared in the same fashion that she had entered.
Could Aphrodite be right? Should he go to her? Even though she had made it clear that he was not welcomed in her presence? Could there ever be more than sex and violence between them? Would Xena let there be? Ares wanted to trust his sister's expertise but he considered himself the expert where Xena was concerned. Remembering the parting look that Xena had given him crushed all the courage that had sprung from Aphrodite's pep talk.
AXAXAXAXAXAXAXAX
The travelers reached Potidea two days before the opening of the Autumn Moon Festival. Xena was glad to have finally reached their destination but she was not looking forward to participating in the local holiday celebrating the annual harvest. Gabrielle, on the other hand, was beside herself. Growing up it had been her favorite Potidean festival. She had already entered the storytelling contest. She had won the contest for six straight years before she'd decided to follow a life of adventure. Xena didn't doubt for a minute that Gabrielle would reclaim the title Poet of Potidea. It felt good to see Gabrielle's easy smile after their recent problems. So Xena didn't even bitch when Gabrielle signed her up for the pumpkin throwing competition. But she couldn't help but think that Eve didn't know how lucky she was that she had decided not to join them after they had finished their business in Pylos.
"So, Xena, who are you dressing as?" Gabrielle's sister Lila asked as she poured the warrior a cup of ale
"Dress as?" Xena looked at the amber liquid inside her mug. She didn't know if she'd ever get used to looking at Gabrielle's younger sister looking so much older than the two of them.
"Yeah," Gabrielle butted in,"it's part of the fun of the festival. You have to wear a disguise. I am thinking of going as Circe or maybe Sappho."
"I hate costumes. I think I'll pass," Xena answered and took another drink of ale.
"Oh, don't be that way, you've been a grump the whole way here, you're not going to ruin the holiday for me. You are dressing up, even if I have to pick your costume." Gabrielle eyed Xena up and down, "A gorgon maybe, the way you're looking at me now, you could turn me to stone."
Lila looked away. There was definitely something going on between these two that she didn't want to get in the middle of. "I am going to bring the rest of your things to your old room," Lila told Gabrielle in an effort to excuse herself.
"Thanks, Lila, you're so thoughtful."
"I'll have Sarah gather your things, Xena."
"Don't bother, I think I will just stay in the stable with Argo, if it's all the same to you."
"Whatever makes you most comfortable," Lila picked up Gabrielle's bag and headed toward the back of the house.
Gabrielle shot Xena a glare. So now she didn't even want to share a bed with her? She wished Xena would just tell her what in the name of Zeus was going on. "Xena, can I speak with you? Outside?"
Xena downed the last of the ale and walked out the front door without a word. Gabrielle followed on her heels.
"What is up with you?" Gabrielle would have chalked Xena's behavior up to being her moon time if she hadn't known that Xena had already passed that time of month. She remembered Xena mentioning that her period had been shorter than usual. Gabrielle hadn't thought much about it at the time since they were travelling and Xena had been acting so stressed. But now she was thinking that maybe her short period was a sign of something else entirely. Xena certainly wasn't getting any younger. The change of life would certainly explain the moodiness and the lack of sexual desire. Still, it didn't explain why the warrior couldn't even stand the thought of sharing a bed with her.
"I've just never been comfortable here, you know that. Your family has never taken a shine to me."
"I know, but the stables, really? You might as well stay across town at the inn!"
"If you'd prefer it. . ."
"The question is, is it what you would prefer?" Gabrielle softened, "Xena, whatever I've done. . ."
"Stop it, it's not you, it's not anything that you've done. It's. . .it's what I've done." Xena was torn. She wanted to tell her, she had had the whole walk across Greece to say something but hadn't found the courage. It didn't seem right to spring it on her here in her home, not when Gabrielle was looking forward to enjoying the holiday. It would be selfish to unburden herself now. She promised herself that she'd tell her as soon as they left Potidea. That, of course, was assuming that her friend would even want to leave with her. With the way things were going between them she wasn't so sure that Gabrielle wouldn't want to stay home with her family.
"What are you talking about?" Gabrielle moved toward Xena.
"It's nothing, look, it doesn't matter," Xena placed a reassuring hand on her friend's shoulder. "I am sorry, I'll explain later but I just need some space right now, okay?"
"Okay," Gabrielle unconditionally accepted Xena's explanation. "But won't you at least sleep in the front room? The stables will be cold."
"The stables will be fine." Xena reached down and kissed her on the cheek. Gabrielle's disappointment was still palpable between them but she nodded that she'd accept Xena staying in the stables. "Thank you, and since you are being so understanding, I will even dress up for your little festival."
Gabrielle grinned. "Really? Who are you going to be?"
"Not sure yet, but I'll figure it out before the festival opens. Are we okay?"
"Of course, Xena. We will always be okay." Gabrielle kissed her on the mouth before walking back into the house. As Xena watched her friend go, she couldn't help but think that if Gabrielle knew her dirty little secret they would not be okay.
AXAXAXAXAXAXAXAX
Ares had spent the last few days thinking over the wisdom in his sister's words. He realized that yes, he did owe Xena an apology and he was going to deliver it, whether she wanted to receive it or not. The god rose from his throne and walked into his private chambers in the Halls of War. A chest crafted of silvery smooth Hephaestian metal sat at the foot of the bed. A large ruby was fixed where a keyhole would normally be found. Ares pressed his thumb to the dark red stone and the chest opened with a hiss. Ares had seen Zeus apologize to Hera on many occasions and his father never did so without bringing the goddess a gift. Ares knew that Xena would not be swayed by golden goblets, jeweled tiaras, or richly dyed silks. He reached into the chest and pulled out a simple chain link necklace. Dangling from it was an arrowhead stamped with the symbol of the stag. The blood that had stained the stag black, Ares knew, belonged to none other than Achilles. It was a gift only a warrior the calibre of Xena deserved. Ares closed the necklace in his fist, shut his eyes, and brought it up to his lips. It had been he who had gifted Paris with the arrows that would always fly true to their target. The Trojans might have lost the war but Achilles had fallen. Ares smiled at the memory, he had long harbored suspicions that Achilles had been another of his father's bastards and seeing him brought low had been a victory in its own right. Ares stood and pocketed the charm. He looked at the bed in front of him. Four ebony posts held up a canopy curtained in blood red velvet. With a thought Ares parted the curtains. He let himself indulge momentarily in an old fantasy. How many times had he pictured her there, displayed before him on the black silk? He'd invited her there in her warlord days, but she had been so damn obsessed with conquest that it had been difficult to get her to leave the battlefield. Subsequently, most of their fuckfests had taken place in the dark confines of her command tent. He had managed to get her to one of Aphrodite's infamous orgies but he hadn't been able to keep her to himself as he would have liked. No, she had spied a cute blonde servant girl and the three of them had engaged in a menage a trois. Ares waved his hand and the curtain fell back in place, he promised himself, if he ever got her in his bed, he would show her another side of him. He'd lay her down and cherish every inch of her. And damn her to Hades if she laughed at him for his sentimental side.
Taking a deep breath, he centered himself before he started searching through the aether for her soul signature. Potidea. They must be visiting the bard's family. He wondered if Eve was with them. Things never went well when she was around. Too many things unresolved. Ares opened up a portal and viewed the small town. The city-state was bustling with people. The Autumn Moon Festival was in full swing. Vendors crowed to be heard above the throng, couples walked hand in hand sharing each other's seasonal treats, kids chased each other, weaving through the crowd. A group of athletes had gathered at the edge of town at a small open field that served as Potidea's gymnasium. From the market square, through the city streets, all the way to the outskirts of town, everywhere that Ares turned looked, people were dressed in costumes.
When he zoned in on Xena, his jaw nearly hit the floor. She wore a long flowing white gown that had a split all the way up her toned left thigh. She'd piled her hair atop her head but had left twin curled tendrils to shape her regal face. It was her headdress that shocked him. It was festooned with peacock feathers. Hera, she was channeling Hera! She wore her eye make-up darker than usual. The black kohl made her baby blues pop. The deep bronze on her lips made him ache to kiss her. Oh, a god could dream! What he wouldn't give if she would take her place as his queen and they could rule Olympus together! The temptation was too much. Ares threw together his own costume and headed for Potidea. As he moved through the aether, he reminded himself that he needed to apologize.
AXAXAXAXAXAXAXAXAX
Throwing a full fifteen feet farther than the next closest contestant, Xena won the pumpkin toss. She was awarded a yearling pig and a bag of apples. She gave the pig to Lila and Sarah. The apples she kept for Argo. Gabrielle placed third in the bardic competition. Xena assumed it was because of the farfetched mermaid tale that she told called "Married with Fishsticks." Xena had been bored to tears the first time Gabrielle had told her that story too.
"People just can't share my vision, I guess," Gabrielle ranted as they walked around the agora checking out the various food stalls.
"Mmmmm fried pickles, let's get some of those." Xena fished a dinar out of a small pouch she had hidden under the folds of her gown.
"Three bags for two dinars," the vendor grinned as Xena palmed him the coins. She then hurried to another stall across the way.
"You know what I mean?" Gabrielle asked as she trotted to keep up with Xena's long strides.
"Sure, but all of your stories aren't going to be right for everyone. Maybe this just wasn't the right audience for that particular scroll."
"Maybe." The bard grabbed a pickle from the bag. "Pretty tasty."
"You bet," Xena responded and plopped a blob of goat cheese on top of the pickles. She tossed a coin to the lady running the cheese stall and nodded.
"Want another?" Xena offered.
Gabrielle held her hands up looking at the oily goat cheese oozing over the pickles. "I think I'll pass, besides Lila is making my favorite tonight, lamb chops with roasted potatoes, I don't want to spoil it."
"Suit yourself."
"Speaking of, we should probably get back home. She may have already finished dinner by now."
"You go ahead. I am going to stay out for a bit and enjoy the music," Xena ate another sopping pickle chip.
"Uh-hmmm, I'll see you later then," Gabrielle eyed her warily. Now the Warrior Princess wanted to stop and "enjoy the music?" Oh yeah! Something was definitely off. Xena rarely wasted time on what she normally considered frivolity. Maybe, just maybe, she was mellowing out in her old age.
AXAXAXAXAXAXAXAX
The fat moon hung heavy on the edge of the black sky. It was late. Xena guessed it to be getting close to midnight. Cool wind blew off the Aegean, chilling her exposed arms. She wished she had thought to buy a wrap when she'd chucked out the dinars for the Hera getup. Xena rubbed her hands up and down her biceps letting the friction warm her. She looked around the agora. The vendor stalls had all packed up, leaving the streets to the dancers, musicians, drunkards, and lovers. The wind carried the soft notes of a lute from a nearby tavern. Xena swayed to the slow rhythm as she watched two young lovers secret off, hand in hand down a side alley. She smiled at them. Then, a familiar tingle moved down her spine announcing Ares' presence before his honeyed voice whispered next to her ear, "They've got the right idea, Xena."
She wasn't ready for this! She had told him that she didn't want to see him again. Not after what they had done in his temple. Not after what he had coaxed so easily out of her. Certainly not here, with the intoxicating music, the romantic mood, and lure of the autumn moon. She was afraid that she could get lost in him again. He had to go.
She whipped around to face him. Shock twisted her face. She expected the handsome, dark visage that tormented her dreams. Instead, she saw an old man. Wavy white hair cascaded down his shoulders. He wore his snowy beard long. A white chiton robe was fastened with a solid gold lightning bolt pin at one shoulder leaving the other squared joint exposed. She longed to kiss along it and down his pectoral muscle to the tight tawny nipple that she knew hid beneath the linen. Again, she thought, 'He had to go.' "Why are you in that ridiculous get up?"
"Just joining in on the holiday fun.'
"Zeus?"
"Well, I cheated there. I saw that you had chosen to come as Hera and I dressed to match you. I always said that we should be King and Queen of Olympus."
"Those days are behind us. You've had your fun, now go."
"Oh, my dear, Xena, I've only just begun with the fun," he smiled and materialized a shawl out of thin air and covered her goose-fleshed arms.
Xena shrugged it off. It fluttered to the ground.
"Now why did you do that?"
"I can't afford your prices," she spat and turned to walk away.
"It's not like that," he followed her along the road that ran through the late night revelers. "That was a freebie. No strings, Xena. You don't owe me anything, you never did."
She walked faster. Hoping in vain that she could lose him in the crowd. She weaved in between dancers and pedestrians. She made a sharp turn around a corner only to find him standing in her path. "I told you it's over, we're done. What part of that don't you get?"
"Frankly, all of it. You'll never be done with me."
She punched him squarely in the face.
Xena kept walking as he shook off the punch. He quickly caught up.
"Ares, I am warning you. I am in no mood for this. No mood for you."
"Xena, I came to apologize."
She turned abruptly causing his solid body to slam into her. The contact sent a thrill right to her core. She pushed him hard against a nearby building. She had to get his body away from her. "I don't want to talk about that night. It happened! It's over. We are over! End of story."
She turned to leave. He grabbed her wrist causing her shoulder to pop out of place. She yelped.
"By Zeus, I am sorry, Xena I didn't mean to hurt you. Let me take a look at it."
"You never do. Mean to hurt me that is," She grabbed the knob of her shoulder and jerked it back into its socket. "I am a big girl, Ares, I can take care of myself. I don't need you fixing my booboos. I don't need you for anything, in fact."
"Oh, you may not NEED me Xena, but you just can't stop WANTING me can you?"
"Fuck you, you miserable bastard."
"It can be arranged," he glared. His nostrils flared. She could see that this little spat was turning him on by the rise at the front of his robe.
She shook her head and bolted down the alley toward Lila's house. When she got to the stables, she allowed herself a moment to catch her breath. She looked up again at the autumn moon and silently thanked whatever deity might be listening that he hadn't followed her.
Her own ardor had been as inflamed as his and if she hadn't gotten out of there she might have screwed him in that back alley like a cheap prostitute.
She walked into the stable and saw that Gabrielle had left the awarded bag of apples near her saddlebags. She fished one out and fed it to Argo. The mare nickered and neighed.
Xena took off the peacock headdress and started to unclasp her robe when she felt his presence lurking again. "You can come out, I know you're here."
He chuckled. "You look like a goddess, you smell like a goddess, you even have the senses of one. Why do you deprive yourself of the opportunity? One word, Xena, one word."
"You can keep Olympus."
He licked his lips and pursed them in disappointment. He really did only want to apologize but he could see she wasn't going to accept it. He changed directions, deciding to try a little chit chat. "So why mom?"
"Huh?"
He pointed to her costume, "Why my mother? Hera? She was hardly your favorite of the Olympians."
Xena had asked herself the same question when she originally decided to dress as Hera. Gabrielle had chosen to go as Medusa, Xena should have played along and been one of the Gorgon sisters. Instead, she had opted to portray herself as the goddess of women and marriage. "I don't know, just popped in my head. Maybe she grew on me when she decided to save my daughter."
Ares nodded. "Yeah, I didn't see that one coming either."
"You're not here to compare costumes. You've said your piece, now just go." She ordered.
"I said I am sorry, Xena, and I mean it. The problem is that I feel like you're just not hearing it." Ares pulled out the pendant and held it before her. "I brought you a token to express my forgiveness.
Xena rolled her eyes.
"See. . .See. .that crap right there. It. .you. . . the truth is you don't want me to apologize. I've put you through a lot of shit, okay,I admit it but it's time for you to admit a few things too." Ares tucked the pendant back into his pocket.
"Oh yeah, and what's that?" He was getting her dander back up. If he wanted a fight so bad, he might just get it.
"The truth is you don't want me to be good. You don't want me to change. You're a hypocrite. You are allowed to walk away from your past, find redemption. Hades, you even forgave your murdering daughter. But me. . .well . . .that's another story isn't it?"
"No Ares, the truth is I don't want you period. Good, bad, redeemed, or reprobate. Why can't you just accept it and move on?"
Gods, he hated her sometimes. Stubborn was not a strong enough word. Obstinate wouldn't even begin to describe her. Well, he'd show her.
"Oh, my dear dear Xena, there is a part of me you want. A part of me that you've always wanted. A piece of me that you'll always be drawn to." He crept closer.
She glanced down at his growing erection.
He laughed. "Not that you brazen whore. Oh you like it well enough but that wasn't what I was talking about."
He grabbed her forcefully. His fingers dug into the tender flesh of her arms. He let his power flow over her. He let it fill her. And predictably, she drank it in. She went weak in the knees and he pulled her into his frame to support her. She smelled delicious. He longed to snatch her to the Halls of War and make love to her like he had dreamed. But he knew she'd never go for it. If he tried to do this rationally, peacefully, she'd balk. No! If he was going to have her again, it would have to be as a savage because that's all she could accept of him.
Waves of pleasure surged through her body at the sensation of his power coursing through her veins. As long as she had known him, she had coveted his power, wanted it for her own. Years ago he had promised to make her a goddess. Promised that they'd rule Olympus, the World together as King and Queen of the gods. Promised that every moment would feel like this. His hands on her, his power flowing through her was too much. She let out a keening wail as she orgasmed. The contractions started deep in her pelvic region, rippled through her uterus and exited her vagina in the form of rapid spasms.
When he pulled the power away, she was limp in his arms. Fury ripped through her. She stood erect and punched him in the gut.
He simply backed up and looked at her in disgust.
"What's wrong? Not man enough to fight me?"
"You weren't even going to tell me, were you? He accused. "By the gods you really are a miserable whore. You know I've wanted this for a very long time and you would deny the satisfaction."
"What are you raving about?"
When Ares sent his power coursing through her, he had felt the presence reaching for him. He was in awe. It already recognized him as his father. He was going to have a son! A son! A son with Xena. Then it hit him that she had fully meant to keep the child from him. Well, THAT was not going to happen. By Olympus and all that was holy, he would take his child from her if that's what it took.
Ares looked at her with warning. How could she still be standing there lying to him. Why was she trying to provoke him into a fight? Did the bitch hope that he'd beat the child out of her. Oh, yeah, she'd probably love that. One more notch to add to the belt of reasons to hate the god of war but lust after his power. Gods she was fucking miserable. "Fuck you, Xena, you won't get a fight out of me. Not tonight! Not now! I'll never lay another hand on you in anger."
She punched him again. "Fight back you bastard."
He shook his head. She reared her knee back fully intent on racking him in the groin. He quickly stepped out of reach. His dodging move only served to piss her off even more. She came at him again. She reached for her chakram only to remember that she was still wearing the ridiculous robe.
Ares needed to see her. Needed to see the evidence of his child. He snapped his fingers and she stood before him naked. He froze her. She couldn't move. Sick madness raged through her. He had never fought so unfairly before. Ares took in her nude form. The signs were subtle but they were there, nonetheless. The slightly swelling breasts, the broader hips, and the barely noticeable rounding of her belly. He smiled. This was really and truly the happiest moment of his immortal life. Tears streamed down his face. He knelt in front of Xena.
She looked down at him. So, what? Now he was going to resort to all out rape. Hold her in place with his godlike powers and pleasure her against her will. Classic Olympian god she supposed but not their normal moved in. She closed her eyes preparing to feel his hot mouth close over her swollen labia. But then he simply placed a chaste, almost fatherly kiss on her lower abdomen. Ares stood, released her from the enchantment, and promised, "Xena, you will never keep me away from my son. Never. I will take him from you first."
He disappeared in shards of blue light. Xena stood in the stables in utter shock. How could she have missed the clues? She knew without a doubt that he was right! Had she been so preoccupied with her guilt that she didn't even consider the possibility? Yes, in truth, she had. And now that she knew, joy and fear pulsed through her at the same time. She was going to be a mother, again. Ares was going to be the father.
Suddenly, she realized that he thought that she had been keeping it from him. She had to set the record straight. She didn't want him thinking that she was that kind of monster. But first she had to face the wrath of Gabrielle.
Xena grabbed her shift and threw it on. Walking out of the stables and up toward Lila's house, she touched her belly as if to confirm the truth. She looked up at the autumn moon and tried to do the math. It had been over two months. Her baby would be due in Spring. Had Ares said it was a boy? Yes, he had. She was going to have another son. She hoped he had her brother's eyes and Ares lips.