Chapter 2

'You're cutting off my circulation you know,' she said quietly, as she pushed him gently with her other arm towards the back of the bus.

He drew his hands back, trying to figure out what to do next.

After they'd sat down, she crossed her arms, saying, 'You better do a lot of talking.'

'I know.' He let out a big breath he'd been holding.

'I'm serious, Jess. I'm missing school and I'm supposed to be finalizing the Franklin together with Paris today and working on the yearbook and organizing the handover for next year's board. So I should be at school. But you're here and you're really quiet, which isn't uncharacteristic for you, but given everything that happened, I thought you'd say something more than that thing about prom tickets.' She said as fast as she could, her face was getting flushed.

'Rory, I –' He started, trying to conjure up any elaborate explanation for the mess that was the past few days, but in the end, he just shook his head and said quietly, 'Luke kicked me out.'

'What?' Her brows furrowed together. This wasn't what she'd expected. Her eyes fleeted down to the floor, where she spotted a huge duffel bag. Wait, was he leaving?

He went on, quietly so the rest of the bus wouldn't overhear, 'We had a fight and Luke kicked me out.'

'So? You guys always fight. Why can't you just go back this time?

'I guess I overstayed my welcome.' He shrugged.

Before she could reply, the bus stopped again and a few sleepy passengers got off. Rory and Jess settled into an uneasy silence.

Rory was still mad about Kyle's party, about the way he treated her there. Like trash, as Dean had put it before. Worse yet, Jess just disappeared after the fight, no apology and no explanation. She knew Luke was going to have to pay for a lot of the damage at Kyle's house, but that couldn't be why he'd kick him out, could it? Luke wouldn't do that. After all, Jess had gotten into fights before, maybe without all the property damage, but still… No, it had to be something else, she had a feeling this had to be bigger. Maybe Kyle's parents were pressing charges? But no, she would've heard about that from Dean, or from Lane, who'd checked in with Lindsay. Maybe it was something over Jess's car?

Rory sighed, glancing outside at the window and recognizing the next stop, before saying, 'Come on, James Dean. Let's get off here.'

They exited the bus at a park in Hartford, as Rory took in the large, almost human-sized duffle bag Jess was carrying. The bus had stopped at a nice park, she had been there once to study and had gotten a lot done. This morning, it was quiet, almost serene, with a middle-aged couple walking their shaggy dog and a few joggers. Behind the large trees that lined the walkway, the park had a clearing with a small stream in the middle. If she remembered correctly, there was a bridge somewhere that bore a close resemblance to the one Jess liked so much in Stars Hollow. It was as much privacy as they'd get, away from the curious glances in her hometown.

'So, you were leaving, huh?' Rory started carefully, gesturing at the duffel bag.

'That is usually what happens when a person gets kicked out.' He paused, 'is this where your grandmother lives?'

'No, she lives on the other side of town…' Rory said dismissively, before asking, 'are you going back to your mom's?'

'Yeah, I don't think the houses around here are as big as your grandparents'. That place was really something.' He exhaled, and then seeing Rory's scowling expression, continued, 'And no, I'm pretty sure Liz doesn't want anything to do with me, so no.'

'Right.'

'Also that bus doesn't go to New York.'

'Then where?'

Jess plopped down on a park bench and shrugged, 'I haven't figured that out yet.' He snatched Rory's book out of her hand and started skimming through it.

Rory plopped down across from him. She wanted to press him for details, she had a lot of questions and more than a bit of residual yelling left in her from the incident at Kyle's bedroom, but the way he had clutched at her arm in that bus was unsettling. It felt a bit like the way someone hung onto a rescue boat and it scared her.

'I should've stopped, Rory.' He said, still skimming the book, his eyes looking, but not really seeing the pages. She doubted he'd even glanced at the title. He continued, in the same quiet murmur, 'At the party, upstairs, I should've stopped.'

She tried to meet his eyes, she knew this was about more than what happened at the party, but he still wasn't looking at her.

He tried again, 'I'm sorry … And I'm sorry I yelled at you like that.'

'Why did you?' She asked, sounding tired. He was still flipping aimlessly through the book, but Rory pried it away from his fingers.

'Why did you?' She repeated.

He ran his hands over his face and as he looked around, Rory could tell in his eyes that he was closing off again, 'this is a nice park. Very green.'

'Yeah, well, parks are known for that.'

'Nice benches too. Positioned right, y'know, so the sun doesn't hit you right in the eye.' His eyes stared at a nearby tree intently, 'I mean, some benches are just facing the sun straight-on and after a while, you end up with a headache.'

'Not this bench though.'

'Nope. Perfect angle, this one.' He pursed his lips, exhaling slowly and still gazing at the tree. He was silent for a moment, then his voice was barely a raspy whisper when he said, 'I thought it was gonna be the last time, y'know, for us. At the party I mean. I just–' He broke off, and tried again, 'I know I should've stopped, Rory, and I swear, I never meant to hurt you... But that night, that was the only thing that wasn't awful. You. Us. The only thing that wasn't completely…' He scoffed, '…screwed up.'

Rory somehow believed him, she'd known it deep down; that night wasn't really about her. Still, she pressed gently, 'I told you I wasn't ready.'

'I know, Rory, and I never should've pushed you, I –'

'And now, you're leaving again, without even telling me? If I hadn't taken a late bus today, I wouldn't have even seen you.'

'I didn't want you to hate me.'

'I just don't get it, why you'd snap like that.'

'I'm sorry.' His face was solemn and apologetic, but there was something else too. Something that made him look very young, his expression completely raw and open. She had seen him look like that before, she realized. It was after he'd crashed her car, he'd been shaking as he'd slid over to her and asked her, repeatedly, whether she was hurt. His façade, the angry leather jacket attitude, the cocky face he put on for everyone, had disappeared and he'd been worried, almost frantic, as he'd helped her out of the car, given her his jacket and used her cell to call an ambulance. It was the first time she'd really seen that Jess was, like her, just a kid, and sometimes a very scared one. This is all my fault, Rory, please tell me you're ok, he'd said. Each time, she'd replied, It's not your fault, Jess, really.

Rory sighed and leaned in slowly and placed his head on her shoulder as she wrapped her arms around him. She didn't know what was going on, but it was clear to her that he was very shaken. Jess was more scared than she'd ever seen him.

It was a bit of an awkward hug, with them positioned opposite each other on the bench. He just placed his hands on her arms and nuzzled slightly against her warm shoulders. She stroked his hair gently, which she did quite a lot lately, since she deemed it the perfect hair length to play with.

'Jess,' she started softly, 'Just because I wasn't ready... I mean, we talked about it before, and you knew I wasn't ready yet, but that doesn't mean I wanted to break up. I don't get it. This isn't –'

He pulled himself away from her, standing up and walking to the edge of the bench. He shook his head and said, 'I think you'll change your mind when you find out.'

'Find out what?'

'That I'm shaving my head and joining the circus.'

Rory wasn't amused and she wasn't letting this go. 'Jess, what's going on? Find out what?'

'I'm not going back to Stars Hollow. I can't stay at Luke's and –' He cut himself off.

'What happened? Is it about the fight with Dean? Did something happen at school?'

'I couldn't get you prom tickets, Rory, that's what happened.' He retorted, his voice getting louder. He hung his head and stuck his palms against the back of his neck.

'You better start making sense, Mariano.'

He shook his head, and retreated back into denial mode. 'I'm really hungry. Is there anything to eat here?'

'No.'

'There's gotta be some place around. Pancakes?'

'Jess.' Rory warned.

'I think we should eat first before I tell you and you hate me and we get into a fight.'

'We are in a fight, so no.'

'Maybe some fries?'

'What is it that you won't tell me?'

'I'm feeling a bit light-headed. Icecream?'

Rory shook her head in dismay and covered her face with her hands. She felt the sudden urge to leave. It was so stupid, her coming here, prying every sentence out of him. What was this supposed to accomplish? What had her mum said about boys and leather jackets? Rory laughed suddenly, as she jumped off the bench, turned on her heel and started walking away, muttering, 'You don't even have a motorcycle.'

…...

'Rory, where are you going?'

'I'm not doing this, Jess. I have to get to school. If you don't wanna tell me, I'm not gonna sit here and pry it out of you.' She just needed to cross the park, get to the opposite side and then take the bus back to Chilton. It was clear he wasn't going to talk, so this whole morning was beginning to seem more and more like a waste of time. She tried to recall how often the buses in Hartford came. She already missed the first period, but at least, the rest of the day wasn't wasted.

'Rory, wait.'

'Leave me alone.'

'Just slow down!'

He was following her, dragging along his huge duffel bag. When they got to the stream, Rory hopped onto the bridge, speeding up, eager to get to the bus station.

'Hey, there's a swan here!' His voice piqued up, pointing at a swan that was pecking the side of the bridge.

Rory turned on her heel, incredulous, 'There's a swan here? Well, that's just great. Let's list some other irrelevant facts that may come to mind. Look, here's a duck.' She was facing him now, pointing at random things around as she walked backwards, still rambling, 'And a tree and another five trees over here. And back there, I saw an ant crawling into the side of a rock, followed by its little ant friends.'

'Hey, I'm just pointing out as a warning. Swans can be dangerous, you know.'

'No, they can't.'

'They don't look it, but they're ruthless.'

'No, they're not.'

'I was attacked by a swan once.'

She had to laugh at that. It was so ridiculous. She rolled her eyes and paused in front of him. 'I'm sure they'll make a movie about that. A spinoff from Shark Attack, only with a more horrifying, menacing creature. The kindergarteners will be terrified.'

'I was just remarking, 'cause if, at any point, you wanted to throw me in the water, just remember you're throwing me in with a vicious, vicious bird.' He shrugged sheepishly, rocking on his heels.

'Very tempting.' She crossed her arms.

'You'll feel much better. Luke swears it's cathartic.'

Rory glared and she thought she was doing a fair job at it, until the swan made a loud quacking sound and Jess jumped, almost dropping his duffel bag. She bit back a laugh.

She cleared her throat and said in a serious tone, or what she hoped was one. 'Tell me what happened with Luke, or you'll have to fend yourself against swanosaurus over here.'

'Rory, I told you, I couldn't get the prom tickets –'

'I don't care about the stupid prom, Jess!'

'—They won't let me go and so I can't take you. It was the only thing you really wanted from me and it should've been pretty simple –'

'Forget about the prom!'

'—but I can't do it, because I'm not graduating.'

'What? That's not true, you –'

'Turns out you're dating a real screwup.'

'You're dropping out of school?'

'No, see, dropping out of school would be deliberate. There's at least some dignity in that.' He stepped forward, 'Me, no, I flunked out.'

Rory finally understood what the fight was about, why Luke flipped out. She stepped closer. 'Oh God, Jess –'

'And in Stars Hollow, I mean, it's Stars Hollow. Who the hell flunks out of that rainbow town? I'm pretty sure even Liz managed to graduate.'

'You can talk to them and to Luke. They can let you make up for it.'

'Kirk too. Even Kirk graduated.'

'Did you try with the school? Luke can help or me, I can go talk to them.'

'Forget it, Rory. I'm not going back.'

'Jess, you don't have to leave. We can fix this.'

'You'll be going off to Yale and I'll be making minimum wage lifting boxes at Walmart for the rest of my life. That's the kind of screwup you're with, Rory.'

'Stop that. You're not a screwup. '

'That's the kind of loser you're dating.'

'Enough with this loser crap.'

'Don't say that just to make me feel better.' He scoffed.

'Seriously, stop that.'

'You should just say it.'

'Say what?'

'What you're thinking. You're not seriously gonna introduce me to your Yale friends as the guy who couldn't graduate high school, are you?'

'No, I won't. Because I'm not a stuck-up bitch, for one thing. And because that's not who you are. This school thing doesn't define you, it never has.' Rory took a step closer.

'Look at me, Ror.' He waved at himself in defeat, 'Guys like me don't end up with girls like you.'

'Would you stop with all the self-hate? We'll figure this out and I'm not going anywhere –'

'You were gonna dump me anyway.'

She threw her hands up in exasperation. '– You're the one who was running off to God-knows-where without saying goodbye. Look at your stupid bag, you were the one leaving me.'

'You didn't even want me, Rory. All along, you just picked me 'cause you were tired of what's-his-face.'

'You think I didn't want you? Are you blind, Jess?' She exclaimed, debating whether she should tell him she had 'the talk' with her mom, that she was on the pill, that she was so thinking about it with him. She just shook her head slowly and said, 'I like you, a lot, okay? And that's something you shouldn't be doubting by now. But you're making this so... you're just always disappearing. All I keep thinking is 'God, I hope he doesn't just take off the very next minute.'' She waved at his duffel bag.

'Hey, I didn't exactly have a choice this time.' His voice was louder now. 'There was the whole issue of me getting kicked out, remember?' His voice softened, as he said, 'I don't wanna leave you, Rory.'

Rory cocked her head. Her tone shifted suddenly, as she said, 'Then come back.'

'Come back where?'

'I'll talk to mom. She'll let you stay over for a few days.'

He scoffed, 'Oh, come on. Your mom hates me.'

'No, she doesn't.'

'I'm pretty sure she does.'

'Grandma, yes. But mom, no. You just have to be a little nicer to her.'

'Yeah, I don't think so.'

'What's your plan then? For tonight? Where were you gonna sleep?'

He hesitated. He was wondering that same thing himself. He cleared his throat and said, 'I have money. I can figure it out.'

'Good, then save your money and let me help. You can leave afterwards, when you make a plan.' She stepped forward, her face really close to his now. Her eyes were pleading, wide and innocent.

'I can handle this.'

'I know you can.'

'I just need to get out of Stars Hollow and then I'll figure it out.'

'Jess, I have no doubt in my mind that you're gonna make it. You're gonna do something big and become –'

'Oh, come on, Rory.'

'—this incredibly successful guy and surprise everyone.'

'Yeah, right.'

'You're smarter than anyone I've met. But you need to just sit for a minute and collect your thoughts. Figure out exactly what to do. So please, just let me help.'

'I'm not going back to Stars Hollow.'

'One night. No one will know you're there. Just us.'

He hesitated, 'I don't think –'

She stepped closer to him, close enough to see the freckles on her face, putting her hands on his shoulder, 'you need this one night of calm, before all the chaos starts. So just, say yes, please.'

He had to admit, her Bambi-eyes were making it hard for him to remember how to breathe. Just us. Realizing he was just staring like an idiot, he just exhaled and said weakly, 'You're a first-class manipulator.'

'Is that a yes?'

'You don't know that she'll let me stay.'

She smiled, wrapping her arms around his neck. 'Don't worry, sad boy. I can take care of that.' She settled her forehead against his and kissed him sweetly.

...

AN: Please, please leave me a review and let me know if you like it so far!