Chapter 24

Everything felt so pointless. Every moment I was filled with unbearable pain. My entire body felt heavy and all I wanted to do was sleep, but even sleep wasn't an escape. More time had passed but I wasn't sure how much. Had it been two moons? Three? A year? I wasn't sure. All I knew it was past time to die. I didn't know how my body was still functioning. My mouth was dry and my stomach empty, which both thirst and hunger can kill you. It was only a matter of time, right? Hopefully it would all end soon.

I had promised Tallblaze I wouldn't give up no matter what, but I couldn't keep going. Surely he'd rather me die than suffer. I'm sure he would. Besides, he's the medicine cat, I can visit him in his dreams once I die. Plus the Dark Forest cats can obviously talk to the living so even if I do go there, we can still talk. After all, even the Dark Forest itself was better than this living Dark Forest.

I wonder if my friends miss me. I'd like to think they do, that they think about me often, that they'd be sad but relieved when I finally died and could escape this nightmare. I'd hate to know they were distressed over me, but at the same time the thought was comforting. I liked to think someone still cared about me. It made living a tad bit easier.

I heard movement as blinding light shone into my prison. I looked up, squinting my eyes against said light. Grasstail and Coldclaw were there of course.

"Hello! How are you doing this fine day?" Grasstail asked.

I grunted to let him know I heard him, but didn't care. I didn't have the energy to care.

He walked up to me. "Are you going to answer me?" he asked. I again didn't respond. He scratched my side. "Answer me!"

"What's the point? You're gonna hurt me anyway," I murmured. "I don't have the energy."

"You know, it's a lot more fun when you've got some sort of will," he told me. "Are you really gonna give up that easily?"

I lifted my head. "It's been like a year, I don't call that giving up easily," I argued.

"It's hasn't even been three moons," Coldclaw inputted.

"Oh, well then," I responded.

"It would be worse than this if you'd been here a whole year, believe me," Grasstail told me. "It certainly only gets worse from here."

"Okay then," I said. "I'll be dead soon anyway."

"We're not letting you die that easily," he promised me.

I just laid my head down again. I can't give them the satisfaction. Might as well make us all as miserable as possible. I'm pretty sure he was villain monologuing or something because he stopped talking and prodded me with his paw.

"Are you even listening?" he asked.

I lifted my head again to face him. "Oh, sorry, what did you say? I wasn't listening," I responded.

He clawed my back again and I laid back down. Maybe this would pass faster if I could fall asleep. I wish I could fall asleep forever, but I hadn't reached that point though. I closed my eyes, tuning Grasstail out, until sleep took over.

"Hello Jinx," Lightstar greeted.

I was laying down and didn't bother getting up. "Hello," I responded.

She wasn't a cat I was crossing right now. She had much more power over me and knew how to best get to me. Besides, if I'm good for her she's good to me. As much as I hated to say this, she was the best I had right now. She wasn't that bad or at least she was better than Grasstail and Coldclaw, which isn't saying much but greatly influenced this statement.

"So how are you doing?" she asked.

"Not well. I just don't see the point anymore and am just waiting until I die," I answered.

"Well, you can fix that," she told me. "I'll help you if you agree to help me. Agree to take over the Clans and you won't ever have to see that hole again. You can rise above your enemies."

"Sorry, but that doesn't interest me," I responded.

"If you don't feel like anything matters, why should this matter?" she asked. "It will help both us out and worse case scenario you die, which you really seem to want that."

"I don't want to hurt anybody. I'm not taking over the Clans," I told her. "I'm sorry."

"Fine then, rot away in that hole. Die slowly and painfully. It's your life," she responded. "It won't hurt me any when you're used against all your friends to lead to their downfall."

"I don't want that to happen either!" I exclaimed. "I don't want to take over the Clans and prove Wingstar right about me but I don't want my friends to get hurt either! There has to be some other way! If you care about me at all, have some sort of sympathy for me, just kill me. Please. You know even if I gave into you I'd just let them kill me. Dark Forest, they could kill me anyway. You know it is useless though! You know it, I know it, every cat knows it! So just kill me! End my pain and suffering! Please!"

She walked up to me and I whimpered softly. She was mad, wasn't she? "This kind of behavior won't do, it won't do at all," she told me. "So how about you show a little dignity, hmm? My apprentice certainly isn't giving up yet. Deathfire, I know you have a lot more fight in you than this. Goodness, I've fought against that hard head of your's. So how about you keep your head up and not let yourself die this easily?"

I curled up into a ball. "Go ahead. Do what you want. It's not going to change anything," I stated. "I'm done fighting, I'm done trying. It won't get any easier so why keep going?"

"Just rest," she told me. "I know I'm not getting anything out of you right now. You're too tired."

I blinked, trying to make sure this was actually Lightstar. She was letting me rest? She was being kind? Who was this cat?

"You still have your uses to me, Jinx, but you won't have any if you die or give up like some sad pathetic scrap of fur," she said. "So don't."

"Wow, thanks," I muttered.

She lashed out, scratching me. "I'm being easy on you, you better not make me regret it," she warned. There's the Lightstar I know and hate.

"Yes ma'am," I murmured.

"Good," she responded. "I'll leave you alone then."

My vision went black and I actually slept for the first time in a long time.

I woke up to Grasstail shaking me.

"Good morning," I said.

"You've been out for three days," he informed me.

I realized how sticky I felt and look down to see a dry pool of what I'm assuming is my own blood. That explains the three days. "Apparently I have," I responded.

"You know what that means?" he asked.

"That I can sleep for three more days?" I asked hopefully.

"No, it means we have some time to make up for since you were unconscious," he answered.

"Seems like you've been playing with me anyway," I responded.

"It's not as fun without your reactions," he told me.

"I'm flattered," I said. "But afterwards can I sleep for three more days?"

He lashed out, scratching my cheek. I jerked away. Oh right, I almost forgot these guys had full power over me and my situation in my moment of drowsiness.

"You excited?" Grasstail asked.

I whimpered, curling into a ball, preparing for the worse. We're back to this, aren't we? That fox-heart Lightstar helped me regain some will to live. Deep down, however, I knew it wasn't anything she said, just my own instincts. Part of me wanted to live. Part of me refused to give up. Part of me was horrified by the idea of death. And that part of me was terrified. I was terrified. I couldn't take much more of this, yes, but I'd take as much of it as I had to. Because someday I'd be safe. I had to be. Things had to get better. Right? I knew they didn't have to be, but I liked to hope anyway, even if I was vastly disappointed.

Author's Note: I love villains. And as much as Dark Forest training can be an overused plot point, I love Lightstar and her interactions with Deathfire. Lightstar is my favorite villains of the series actually. She is so fun to write and, despite having simple petty motives, has a complex personality. The Dark Forest training actually wasn't planned at first, like many things, but I'm glad I added it. Then again, the entire plot from this book on was supposed to be completely different, but I trashed it all and went in this direction. As much as I'd like to rant about the original plot of this series, that would take too much time. But you all should appreciate all my wonderful spontaneous decisions that completely changed the story because Tallblaze was never supposed to become an important character. Anyway, feel free ti leave a review, they are always appreciated. See you next week!