'So,' Maya signed, crawling through the window into Riley's room, 'how are you and huckleberry going to spend winter break?'

'Are you going to keep fingerspelling nicknames?' Riley asked with a giggle.

Maya shrugged. 'Unless you want to give him a real one.'

Riley paused. For the last few weeks, she and Maya had been using the same 'initial name sign' for Lucas that they did for Farkle, Isadora, and Zay - just waving an 'L' near their forehead.

'You don't have to overthink it,' Maya signed, and Riley pursed her lips.

'It's a lot of power,' she admitted.

Maya nodded. 'I understand that. Choosing a sign that will define him for the rest of your relationship-'

'You're not making me feel better!' Riley signed frantically.

Maya smiled. 'You gave me my name sign,' she reminded her, making the 'm' and waving it down her hair.

'That's different; I was eight,' Riley reminded her, chewing on her lip.

'I'm just saying,' Maya raised her eyebrows, 'don't stress over it. It'll come to you and you'll know.'

The two girls sat for a few seconds, lost in their own thoughts as the winter sun set outside the window.

Riley knew that the minute she gave him a name sign, it would be official - he would be part of her life. And she wasn't sure she was ready for that.

On the other hand, she knew that she did want him to be part of her life - she wanted to go on dates with him and watch movies and put their hands in popcorn and touch and feel that jump in her stomach for the rest of her life. But Lucas was the first boy she had ever liked, and she didn't want to rush it. She didn't want to scare him away.

She had never met anyone like Lucas; so handsome, kind, good. Considerate, cool - and he liked her? She was the weird girl who didn't talk. No one had even tried to really be her friend since Isadora joined their little group back in fifth grade - mostly for Farkle.

So why Riley, of all people? She didn't feel like it made sense - that perfect guy who could have anyone else in school, wanted her?

It wasn't like she was an easy girl to date, either. He had to put in the work to even be able to communicate with her. But he did.

Riley couldn't help but feel like her life had changed forever, the day that he had bumped into her in the hallway.

'Hey,' Maya waved her hand, pulling Riley out of her thoughts. 'I was supposed to talk to you about something.'

Riley raised her eyebrows, interest piqued.

'So, Josh invited us to go to Rochester with us this weekend. He's doing a photo essay there-'

Riley waved her hands. 'Wait, wait. What? When did you talk to Josh, and why are you just telling me now?'

Maya chewed her lip. She had been anticipating this discussion, which was why she had waited until the absolute last minute to tell Riley about it. 'Rochester is a huge place for Deaf people,' she skirted the real questions. 'More people know sign language.'

Riley's eyebrows furrowed, studying Maya. Part of her was dying to know what this was really about - but she also knew that if she forced Maya to talk about something, she would just clam up.

'He talked to your mom, she said we could go,' Maya signed, and Riley nodded slowly.

'Alright,' she agreed warily. Changing the subject, she signed, 'Do you want to sleep over?'

'I have to go home tonight, pack and tell my mom about tomorrow,' Maya signed apologetically. 'But I'll be here at 7, like always?'

Riley nodded, watching Maya disappear out the window as she stayed still on the bench.

There was definitely something going on there.

But did Riley want to know?

Sure, Maya had had a crush on Josh for years. But she had always thought it was the kind of crush that middle schoolers had - unrealistic crushes on older guys. But they were in high school now, and Riley was afraid things had gotten more serious while she hadn't been paying attention.

What if Josh and Maya were… what? Dating? Hanging out? He was in college and she was in high school. There were a lot of problems just surrounding the age difference. Not even mentioning how weird she felt knowing that Maya, who had been lusting after her uncle for years, might actually be lusting with him now.

With? Was that the right word?

Riley had no idea. She was woefully inexperienced in everything love-related, and she knew she depended on Maya for a lot. But Maya didn't tell her much about her own love experiences, which was what Riley was regretting right about now.

Was she okay with this? She didn't know.

It seemed she didn't know a lot, nowadays.

A/N: This is a really short chapter, but I decided to just post it tonight. I had it done last night but my sister distracted me, and then I was going to add to it more today but my homework distracted me. I'd rather just post a short chapter than spend another night/day with it on my plate.

Writing fanfiction has gotten to be less fun and more stressful now, but I'm too deep into it to stop! I've got some more ideas for chapters of this book, and I'm getting really excited about Nodus Tollens, which is just going to be straight up drama Rucas/Joshaya (with a good happy ending). I've already got several scenes of really sexually tense back/forth play-flirting(/fighting) between Josh and Maya (it's going to have all the cliche's, don't worry!), and I've got a bunch of angsty and fluffy scenes with Riley and Lucas. Unfortunately, I got so excited that I just started writing the angsty/sexy/fun scenes and haven't placed an outline yet, which is why no chapters have been posted yet.

I'm definitely neglecting my homework, but I'm one of those really annoying girls who's like "omg I'm gonna fail I don't even care anymore I swear" and then gets a 3.9 GPA. It's the anxious-perfectionist-procrastinating-gifted-child in me.

(I certainly don't expect everyone to read the whole author's note; I'm just ranting now)

Aaand now it's midnight. Good job, C. Your sleep schedule is history.

Kisses,

C