Back again. Chapter 13, let's go!

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Fin still couldn't get over what happened, even though two weeks had passed.

He and the man had gone to an out of the way coffee place that Fin knew, and the man nervously tucked himself into a corner booth while Fin ordered black coffee from the waitress and he'd taken a moment to look over the man. He'd seen him before, but where? Nervously looking around, the man began to speak in a barely there voice as he fiddled with his coffee cup.

"Maybe I shouldn't be here...maybe I made a mis-"

"Please," Fin pleaded, so anxious to know what it was that this man had to say. Between he, Nick and Olivia, they'd gone through every possible lead, left no stone unturned when it came to Amanda and getting her back home alive or God forbid, dead. And after Pablo's unexpected death, they were now at the very end of their rope. "You want protection? I need you to talk first, now what do you know?"

"All that for nothing!" Fin said, still annoyed two weeks later as he closed his laptop and prepared to leave the precinct for the night.

He thought that the man, Michael would have told him something useful but all he'd had to say was that the last time he'd seen her, Thomas had kidnapped and brought her to the site of what was going to be his nightclub in Manhattan.

"...it was empty because it was still under construction and things had been stalled with contractual agreements with the team. It was the perfect place, Mr. Kirland said." And he hung his head regretfully "...no one would hear her scream..."

He admits now that that was the wrong time to lose his temper. In seconds he'd had the man by the throat. He could still see the fear in his eyes that Fin would snap his neck and when Fin got hold of himself and let go, the man hauled ass out of there, not to be seen or heard from again until three days later when they found him dead of a single gunshot wound to the temple. They said it looked like a suicide, but Fin knew better and he'd never gone to Olivia with it because she had enough to deal with. Still does. Besides, if the man had told him anything useful...instead, it came down to Fin going to the still abandoned site and doing some investigating, though what he hoped to find there after almost nine months, he had no idea.

"How did this man make her disappear?" he asked aloud to an empty precinct and bothered by the quietness. He picked up his coat and left Liv's office that he was currently using while she was away and turned off the light. He'd stop in to check on her and the girls before he went home for the night.

...

"...wait, what are you saying?" Olivia asked, still unsure of what Nick was telling her. He'd tried to give her the news as easily as he could, keeping in mind that she was grieving and pregnant but he only ended up confusing her. "what did Thomas do if he did anything; did he do anything? I don't…"

"Liv…" Nick took a breath as he got up to walk around the room, and Olivia, struggling, stood up, and followed him. Walking toward the window as she held the underside of her belly and felt a twinge.

"I told you to let me be the judge of what I can take, Nick. What happened to Amanda?"

He looked at her standing there by the window, looking tired but he knew her and she was right. Situations don't change your DNA… She'd told him that a long time ago and she was right. At the end of the day, she was still Olivia Benson. The same Olivia Benson who had gone and gotten through so much, and now was no different. She could handle this.

"Nick?"

He was preparing to speak when they both heard one of the twins cry out.

"Mommy…?"

Olivia let off a sigh, quietly but definitely there as she again stretched her back, looking so tired. "Duty calls"

"Yeah go." Nick said, watching her as she walked around the huge fireplace that took up a wall and disappeared into the back of the cavernous apartment.

…

"You made it!" I heard a warm, familiar voice say and my head quickly shot up and looked in the direction from which it came and I was suddenly overcome with relief. The very second I saw Fin standing there, I couldn't keep my emotions in line and I ran, crying into his arms; never having been so thankful to see someone in my entire life!

"You don't know how happy I am to see you!" I cried into his collar, my arms wrapped so tightly around his neck, I was sure that I must have been causing him pain – or cutting off his air.

"It's okay, you're home now" he said as he reluctantly put his arms around me. Fin was never one to display emotion so I know that the moment had to be a strange on for him but seeing that I was in obvious need of comfort for whatever reason, he didn't hesitate to be that comfort for me and just held me close for a long moment before pulling back and taking my face in his hands.

"Why the tears?" he asked as I slowly looked up at him, having forgotten about the bruises to my face but the look on his quickly reminded me. "What happened to you?" Suddenly, soft and warm Fin suddenly morphed into angry, vengeful Fin who was ready to strike!

"I um…I was mugged in Morocco and they banged me up pretty bad" I lied. "I lost my passport, all of my identification…"

"Manda I'm so sorry" he pulled me close again. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah. I'm still shaken up but I'll be fine…did I tell you how glad I am to see you?"

"You did but I don't mind hearin' it again" I think that was the first time I'd smiled in days. "come on, let's get out of here" he said, keeping his arm protectively around me.

"You can fill me in on what happened with Liv on the way to the hospital"

"You don't wanna go home first? You just had a long flight"

"Not until I see for myself that Liv's okay" I said as we made our way through the terminal. It was true, know that Liv was safe was paramount to everything else right now but even so, home was the last place I wanted to be!

"God...I need them. I need my family" I cried as I lay here slowly bleeding to death in this basement. They'd all warned me about him.

Fin and Nick told me he was trouble but I didn't wanna believe it. Even after he'd done the worst to me...it's ironic because this is the actual worst he's ever done to me. I kept going back to a talk I'd had with Olivia just before I was taken.

"Wanna talk?" Olivia asked as we walked through the park. We had come to one of those out of the way roads and decided to sit for a while to rest her leg.

"Not really... I just...I wish that I had listened to you in the first place you know? Thomas...he was no good for me and you knew it."

"Amanda, don't do this to yourself. The important thing is you got out and you're safe."

"Don't forget stupid and naive."

"You fell in love. Love makes us do crazy things."

"It wasn't all love... The real reason I ran from Morocco was because he..."

"Amanda"

"More than once. I thought that if I...I don't know, I just; I'd never been more humiliated."

"I'm so sorry." Olivia said sincerely as she held me. "I wish I had known, I wish you felt you could have trusted me, truster one of us."

"It wasn't trust." I said as I sat up. "I know that I can trust you guys I just; if I had told you, you would have come after Thomas and made me stay away and I didn't want that to happen. I thought that I could change him into a person who didn't do those things and I was wrong; I was so wrong." And that's when my tears broke and I fell into Olivia's arms and just cried.

"It's okay; I promise it'll be okay now."

I thought a lot about that conversation since I'd come into this new life; this life of uncertainty and abuse. Time and again I wished so hard that things had been different. Usually you go through things to learn a lesson, but what was my lesson here I wondered about as often as I recalled that conversation and for the first time in a long time, I wished that I was home.

Maybe Damian meant it when he said he'd kill me in a month. I thought as I lay there on that mattress, that now heavily blood stained mattress, and continued to bleed. I couldn't even pick myself up. Now that the blood had started, the pain became so much worse. I twisted myself into the tightest ball I could, hoping to somehow alleviate it but to no avail. It was so cold in this little room, and I had nothing, not even a blanket to keep me warm and this blinding, stabbing, searing pain was on a mission to kill me, and the way I felt right now it was going to complete that mission.

Two weeks ago I was so sure that I would somehow get out of this and return home, see the people I love and take my revenge on Thomas. Now I wasn't so sure. Because now I was in a dungeon, starved and seemingly abandoned and bleeding from god-only-knows-what. I would die down here. My life, as short as it was will have ended with me lying in my own filth, somewhere.

"Somebody...please…" I cried again. Not that anyone could hear me, or what if they did and just turned a deaf ear, not caring that I was down here bleeding to death? "God, don't let me die this way, not here…"

I suddenly felt sick like I needed to throw up again and I tried to get up only for the vomit to come much faster than I could move, and I threw up all over the floor. Clear vomit that soaked to the mattress right along with the thick blood that was now coming out in giant clots as I continued to cramp so bad I broke nails clawing at the floor.

But then I heard a sound that I hadn't heard in twelve days. The locks on the other side of the door. They were turning, but I was too weak to get up. Too weak to do anything other than lie there and pray that whoever it was, had come to take me out of here. Not caring that they saw the mess that was me.

"Well look at you. Had enough?" I knew that voice as it walked into the room and stood by my mattress. His very expensive leather shoes right by my head. I suddenly felt sick again, and reaching out to him, touching his shoes, I managed to gather enough breath to say:

"I...I'm dying, I…" I tried again to pull myself up but fate had other plans and at that point, the unrelenting pain took me thankfully away.

I came to in spurts, in and out of consciousness as I was being washed by several women.

"So much blood…" I heard one murmur as I drifted off to unconsciousness again. When I woke up the next time, I was in my in bed in my room and it was dark outside as I saw through the large windows that faced the garden. I was still feeling nauseous I discovered as soon as I tried to sit up, but the cramping, thank god, it had seemed to stop.

I thankfully closed my eyes, though still feeling weakened. I was alive! I breathed a shaky breath and was startled nearly half to death when the door to the room opened and a maid came in carrying a large tray.

"You frightened me!" I said, holding my hand against my chest. I had half expected her to be Damian. Of course she didn't respond and simply said

"You eat" as she carefully set the tray down on my lap and removed the cover. In the center, there was a rather large bowl of lobster bisque along with fruit and a pot of tea, the only thing I could actually stomach right now. Of course I couldn't say that. So I just thanked her as she poured the tea then greedily took the cup and took a gulp of the steaming liquid. It felt like heaven as it went down and the woman left me alone.

…

Twenty minutes later, and Olivia came waddling back into the living room.

"Aria was scared and then she wanted water," she said as she sat down on the couch and let off a deep sigh as she dropped her head into her hands. "Nick, I don't know how I'm supposed to do this."

"Liv"

"David's gone. They're both just beyond heartbroken. I'm heartbroken for them and Sophia; Nick my baby blames herself for her daddy not being here-"

Nick sat beside her and ran a hand over his face. "She can't really think that she's to blame" he half said, half asked.

"I assured her that this isn't her fault but she just told me this tonight. She's had two whole weeks of this playing out in her head, messing with everything she thought she knew..."

"Maybe hearing from you was what she needed-"

"And if it wasn't? I hope to god that she heard me and believes me and it put her mind at rest but Nick, something like this, we both know it can ruin a child."

"I prayed for David. Probably harder than I have in a long time. I mean I know we had our differences but nobody deserves that."

"Maybe you were right, maybe I don't need to hear what you came to say right now, but I just, I need something to take my mind off all this. Even if it is more bad news."

Just then, the phone rang and Liv wiped her eyes before she picked it up. "Yes James ...no, it's fine. Please, NYPD comes up immediately, no matter the time. Thank you."

"NYPD?"

"Fin" she said as she prepared to get up.

"I'll get it, don't worry," he said as he walked out of the living room and to the foyer.

"Look who's here!" Nick said as he came back in with Fin.

"I know it's late but I wanted to check on you and the girls"

"Thank you, Fin. I appreciate it."

"I know you're doing the best you can and I've said this a million times, but if there's anything-"

"You're already doing it," she said, grateful as she squeezed his hand.

"You okay?"

"Honestly, no but Nick was going to take my mind off of it"

"With what?" Fin said with an air of suspicion as he looked at Nick.

"Relax, I just came by to share some news but it's looking like maybe I should have given it more thought. She's too upset right now."

"Upset? Ba-" Fin started but Olivia cut him off to get to Nick.

"I'll be alright, and you are not leaving here until you finish what you started! If you know something about Amanda's disappearance-"

"Wait, you know something?" Fin asked Nick who looked back and forth at Fin and Olivia and finally just sighed.

"Mr. Answari-"

"Amira's father? That guy is richer than god!"

"And more connected. I've grown a relationship with him and I asked him to look into Amanda's disappearance last summer. He found out a lot."

"Judging by your tone, not good."

"It's not. He; Thomas, that day last summer, the day all of us had seen Amanda last; she didn't just disappear, Thomas kidnapped her and gave her to a broker."

Shock. Silent shock as Liv and Fin looked at Nick, struggling to formulate words that would describe the storms that had started to brew inside them both. Olivia got up at this point and walked to the windows, rubbing her belly with both hands.

Fin was blown away. "A broker? You mean…"

"Sexual slavery"

"Where? And is Mr. Answari sure about this?" Olivia said as she looked outside at the city. She had to keep her focus somewhere.

"The night she got home from the twins party...he was there guys, Thomas. He was there and angry about the abortion. He beat her and raped her ...Liv?" Nick asked, as he and Fin, worried went to her when she leaned against the wall, humped over and began breathing in deep gasps. "Are you-?"

"No, I'm fine I just…" She grimaced, simultaneously leaning on Fin's shoulder while trying to stop the tears in her eyes but it was no use. Between this news and the pain she was in, she put her hands on her knees as the baby kicked against her back in hard, swift blows. She tried to breathe but it wasn't the easiest right now. "That sick, twisted, son of a-" another deep breath... "

"Take it easy," Fin soothed as he helped her across the room to sit in the armchair.

"Fin, I'm okay,"

"You're not" he said kneeling down in front of her. "Nick, get her some water," he said to Nick but he was already on his way back from the bar with a glass full and handed it to her. She began drinking thirstily.

"Are you sure you're-" Nick asked.

"Guys, I'm fine. It's just hot and the baby's little overactive, that's all." She said as she gave Fin the half-empty glass and he set it down on the coffee table. But she wasn't fine. She'd been having contractions since Sophia woke up well over an hour ago, but ignored them, hoping they were Braxton hicks but it was getting easy to see now that they weren't.

"So how does Mr. Answari know this?" She asked Nick and he and Fin looked at her before giving each other looks. "Guys…"

Nick sighed before he spoke up. "Because before Thomas took her from that apartment, he recorded it and not just that. He recorded every beating he ever gave her, kept it like some damn trophy...it's what Mr. Answari called me to his house for. He gave me proof!"

...

Surprisingly, I finished the entire bowl of bisque and downed three cups of tea before sleep called me again. But the bleeding hadn't come close to stopping so I made a trip to the bathroom before I fell again into a peaceful sleep.

When I woke next, it was still dark out and I sat up a bit, only to be scared again but this time by Damian. He was sitting in the corner, obscured by the darkness where the room hadn't been lit. He quickly solved that problem by illuminating that side of the room with a flick of the lamp and the two of us sat in our prospective places. Him, thinking as he looked at me, and me terrified. Yet still, it was me who with a low, shaky voice spoke first.

"Why am I bleeding?" I may as well have said nothing because he ignored my question and went straight to his own.

"You let your milk dry up?" He asked. What a way to welcome someone back from the brink of death. Still, I knew he expected an answer. Nothing was ever just said or asked hypothetically and I stared at the ceiling as I spoke, the tears deep down making their way to my eyes.

"I tried to keep it. I expressed it everyday until my nipples were sore but I-"

"Let it dry up?" He gave a short and sharp laugh. What did he want me to say? I was left down there freezing for almost two weeks with a loaf of bread. Did he really expect that my milk would keep under those conditions?

"...no worry, well get it back in time." He continued as I let the tears escape thinking about more of those shots. They were horrible and the side effects… I just lay there silently.

"You should know, before we begin," he said as he got up and came to my bed to sit. "...should you try what you tried again, I will kill you, is that understood?"

"Yes, Damian-"

"...and please, save the apologies. You saw a way to get out of here and you did what you thought was saving yourself. But know this...Amanda. can I call you Amanda?"

Hearing my own name stung. Nobody had called me by it in over nine months.

"There is no way out. You were bought and you're to be used for your purpose."

"Being a sex slave is no purpose." What was I doing? I thought as I again spoke without thinking.

"Is that all you think you are? No dear. You see, you have a higher calling. When I told you that bullshit about me orgasming blah blah, I was only joshing. you see you, I have chosen you to make me a very happy man."

"How is that?"

"Easy. I'm going to make money, all off of this beautiful body." He said as he trailed his fingers and began tracing circles around my ring-clad nipple. All I could think about was that he would be bringing more men. More men who would hurt me. "You know, I actually love that about you, that you're so completely sexually unscrupulous. I saw you during the gangbang…"

You mean gang rape?

"We made eye contact and I could see that you were enjoying it. Tell me, did you like having so many cocks all using you at once? So many hands exploring your body?" He said as he continued to stimulate my nipple. Both of them had grown hard and was screaming for more attention. I didn't want this, but it was turning me on and I fought it as more tears sprang to my eyes.

"Look at you. With all you've been through and you're still a horny slut. I bet your pussy is wet right now, isn't it?"

"Yes Damian" I said in a low, broken voice that was laced with tears. The look in my eyes begged him to please let me be but he was right, I was his to do as he pleaded and he planned to take full advantage as he unbuttoned my gown

"...so in about two weeks time give or take, you are going to be with child, and you're going to keep being with child until three are born." He grabbed my nipples with his fingertips and pulled them both away from my breasts.

If he weren't right there I would have laughed but suddenly I felt like crying again when I was reminded how my former master had stolen my ovaries and uterus. This guy wasn't getting a baby from me, he'd been duped.

"I know what your thinking" he continued with a smile as he then rolled them. "How can that be, when I'm now barren? Am I correct? Well, your master lied to you. You weren't sterilized, just given medication that would suppress your menses" suddenly my covers were coming off and his hand was going up my legs, but I felt dizzy and it wasn't because of the nausea that had suddenly come. He couldn't have been saying what I thought he was. He couldn't be. "Did you really think he would; any of you slaves?

"I don't understand..." I said in my shock as I blinked back tears that rolled down my face in spite of my efforts.

"Darling…" He said as he undid his shirt and took it off. "It's all about fantasy. If one of those guests wanted to fuck a pregnant girl, or ten for that matter…"

This had to be a joke! Still, it made sense. The heavy bleeding. Oh god, I was bleeding like this because I was having - "my...period?" My tears were uncontrollable now as they flew from my eyes. Relief? Was it confusion? I was having my period and now this- thing was telling me that he'd basically bought me to be a breeder?

"I know you must still be feeling terrible from your ordeal," He said as he reached to open the nightstand drawer.

My ordeal? Was he serious? My ordeal? My ordeal was nothing compared to what had just been laid on me! I wasn't sterile and had never been given a hysterectomy? I saw Damian withdraw a black pouch from the drawer but paid no mind to it until…

"...so I thought, why don't I give you something to ease your tension?" He opened the pouch and the first thing I saw was a hypodermic needle surrounded by an arm tie and other paraphernalia that a-

"What is that?" I asked, though I knew exactly what it was and I suddenly became even more afraid to the point where I began trying to move away.

"This is going to make you feel good. Better than you ever have," he said as he prepared the injection. Liquid heroin. No. "Don't move" he ordered but I didn't care. Over the last nine months I had been raped, beaten, used for sex and mistreated horribly but this? I wasn't going to let this happen. I needed my mind if I were ever to even hope to get out of this. I thought as I began to cry and weigh my options. No.

At that, I hopped out of bed so fast, faster than even I knew I could and I ran for the door. I had no idea where I'd go, but I had to get out of this room, away from him.

"It's locked ...and so is the bathroom he said as he calmly put the needle down and walked toward me as a looked to my left and my right, in tears.

"Damian please," I said, jiggling the handle of the door that I know had my back against I needed to get out. "I don't want tha-" WHACK! came the crack to my face as he again, backhanded me so that I fell against his arms but I didn't let it stop me. He began dragging my back to the bed and I fought him hard, scratching at his arm and throwing blow after blow, landing them anywhere I could on this mountain of muscles while screaming for somebody, anybody.

"Seraphine" He said as he threw me onto the bed. I immediately tried to get back up but he had become annoyed and slapped me, putting his knee in my chest to hold me down but I was still screaming.

"PLEASE DON'T...PLEASE! SOMEBODY HELP ME!"

He grabbed a hold of my left arm and tied it off tightly above my elbow.

"Damian...no...NO!" I struggled to move but he was like a ton of bricks as he ignored my efforts and held my arm as he got the needle. I felt it as it went into my vein and began to spray the poison that would in seconds make its way to my brain but I continued to fight him for those seconds, until suddenly I was not feeling as stressed and I felt my heart rate begin to slow down. It was like a dream but a nightmare as Damian slowly took his knee off of my chest. I had no fight left in me and just lay there amazed at the world around me all of a sudden.

"You see, that wasn't so bad now was it?" He smiled as I found glory in my stupor and reached for him.

"What did you do?" I sang with a grin.

"Just a little happiness. Did I ever tell you how much I love bloody sex?"

"Not that I can rememberrrr…"

"Well…" He took off his pants, his gigantic cock springing forth then he grabbed the back of my neck and forced me down on my stomach, holding me there as he used the other hand to rip away my panties and blood filled pad. He was in me to the balls in one thrust. I wasn't strong enough to take him as I lay beneath him in tears.

"Say you're my dirty, filthy whore!"

"I-I'm your dirty...filthy...wh-whore" I repeated as tears subconsciously rolled down my face.

This life is not fit for a dog to live.

More to come.