Chapter 7. In Joy and Sorrow
"Shoot."
The gun is heavy and cold against her trembling sweaty fingers. The voice from behind commands again, distant and low.
"Shoot. Or I will."
Aoi saw it once, his lack of sympathy. He kills slowly, taking away piece by piece; until they scream, begging for death.
She'd do anything to never witness that again.
But now the gun is in her hands, heavy and slippery; and the eyes of the victim look straight at her. Begging.
Despite all the training and knowledge, Aoi can't make herself pull the trigger.
"Okay then." It's his voice again, cold and calm, followed with the crack of a distant gunshot.
The cry of pain mixes with her own cries and the sound of yet another shot. More and more, until the empty gun falls down from her hands.
Aoi woke up with a startle. The very first hangover in her life was severe: The head throbbed painfully; the stomach twisted and flipped under the waves of nausea; the whole body was covered with cold sweat. Surprisingly, all her clothes were on, with the exception of boots; which meant someone had taken effort in dragging her probably senseless body to the living quarters. Aoi tried but failed to remember how she had ended up in her own bed.
Shouldn't drink that much. Who would have thought that the pretty doll actually can hold her liquor?.. Hopefully, it wasn't her helping me to my quarters...
Cold shower and painkillers did the trick, at least, partly; and Aoi crawled to the mess hall, hoping that some food and the usual cup of coffee would help.
Merribit was finishing her breakfast already, all good-looking and shining with self-confidence as always. Smaller kids gathered around the blond woman, curious and cautious at the same time, but still courageous enough to question her; one of them even dared to guess her breast size.
Aoi fiddled with the meal on her tray, seemingly out of appetite. Akihiro sat next to her, with his tray enormously full for the breakfast.
"Mornin', Aoi." He cast a considerate glance at the girl. "It's your shift for the patrol in an hour, right?"
"Well..."
"Let's swap. I'm... Huh..." He paused, blushing slightly. "I'm going to get some training with Lafter later on."
Aoi smiled. "Thanks, Akihiro, you're my savior. I got drunk last night, so... not feeling good now."
"Deal, then?"
"I owe you one."
"Nah, don't mention it."
Orga entered the mess hall and took a cup of coffee, completely neglecting the breakfast as usual. Aoi glanced at him warely as he leaned against the counter sipping hot liquid; and the vague memory of warm salty taste across her lips made the girl shudder. The look on his face was unreadable.
She turned to Merribit, only to receive an all-knowing wink.
Aoi took the tray with the rest of her meal and put it on the counter trying to stay as far from Orga as possible.
"Ms Aoi." His deep voice made her freeze as she was about to exit the mess hall. "Drinking alcohol without permission isn't allowed for the crew during the flight."
She gritted her teeth, and instantly regretted the action that only increased the headache.
"I suggest you spend today in the kitchen." Orga continued. "And stay away from the hangar until you sober."
He calmly met her heated glare. "It's a shame I can't discipline Ms Merribit since she's not my subordinate. However, I sincerely hope she'll make you a company out of her own good will. That's all."
The golden stare pierced her almost painfully. Aoi squinted and rubbed her temples, trying to soothe away the dull ache. Instead, her mind graced her with the memory of rapid pulse under her tongue. She choked on her breath.
"Roger that, sir." Aoi squeezed through the gritted teeth, without looking at him.
Orga nodded, finished his coffee and headed out of the mess hall.
Aoi sighed and turned to the counter to face Atra.
"Guess I'm at your disposal for the next twelve hours or so." She said unenthusiastically. "Sorry, I'm probably the most useless person on the Isaribi when it comes to cooking."
"That's fine." Atra smiled. "Isn't it good, to learn something new from time to time?"
Aoi shrugged, not knowing how to respond.
"Here. Try to peel those potatoes off for a start, okay?" Atra offered.
Aoi walked around the counter to find the box with potatoes and the waste container. She sat cross-legged right on the floor, and Atra put an empty pot in front of her.
Aoi pulled out her military knife.
"Um..."
She glanced up at the sandy haired girl.
"Please, could you not use that for cooking? It's a weapon, right?" Atra asked.
Aoi blinked. "In a way, yeah. It's just a tool, nothing more."
"There are tools for cooking, see? It's a peeler. That's how you use it."
In less than a minute a peeled potato took its place in the pot.
Aoi scratched the back of her head. "That was fast, huh. Let me try it out."
An hour later Aoi curiously observed the fresh sore spots on her fingers. Atra's eyes widened.
"Ouch." She said. "Let me take care of those."
Aoi shrugged and clenched her fists several times. "It's nothing, really."
"You still have to pilot with these hands! Just wait a little, okay?"
Aoi sighed and nodded.
She had never encountered such unconditional friendliness as here, in Tekkadan. Surely, the Turbines were kind and sweet and caring; however, the impossible condition of becoming Naze's wife had been always there, dividing her from everyone else, making her feel alien aboard the Hammerhead. On the contrary, Tekkadan crew had accepted Aoi without so much of a question.
Orga, though... He must have some mistrust in women. And yet, even he didn't ask anything about my past; moreover, offered me his everything. And I probably took his words too literally...
The girl blushed, remembering the strange and undeniably erotic experience they shared in the Gremory's cockpit. Suddenly, a vague slideshow of other memories added even more color to her cheeks.
The darkness. Strong arms. The heat. Warm skin. Throbbing pulse under her lips.
Another dream?.. Or not?..
"I'll finish the approximate budget for you tomorrow then, Ms Kudelia. Currently, I'm up for my kitchen duties." Aoi heard Merribit's voice before the older woman entered the mess hall with Kudelia slightly behind her.
"Kitchen duties?.." The blond girl echoed perplexedly.
"It wouldn't be fair to leave all the work for Ms Aoi, especially considering her tender skin." Merribit smiled looking down at Aoi's hands.
She unceremoniously walked behind the counter.
"What have we got here?.. Um, smells nice. But, to make things better..." Merribit started to rummage through the cabinets and boxes.
At that moment Atra returned with some ointment and bandages. "Ms Merribit?.. Ms Kudelia?.. Is there anything I can help with?"
"Definitely not." Merribit smiled confidently. "Please, take care of our pilot here while I'm finishing the dinner. Let's check out if my cooking skills still worth something."
"Can I help you with the cooking, Ms Merribit?" Kudelia piped in.
"No. But feel free to make some coffee for yourself and Ms Aoi. She likes it black." Merribit was already chopping something enthusiastically behind the counter.
Aoi huffed.
"Thanks." She mumbled when Atra began to accurately bandage her sore hands.
"Thanks." She uttered when Kudelia put a cup of aromatic coffee next to her.
Aoi wasn't used to be taken care of; the kind assistance from both girls made her feel somewhat uncomfortable but at the same time warm and pleasant, like cozy smell of the vegetable stew from the cooking pot.
Is that the smell of... my home? My family? I want to protect it. Protect Orga. All of them. I have to.
Kudelia sat across Aoi at the table and stirred cream in her cup thoughtfully, gazing down into the brown liquid.
"Ms Aoi... About the tournament... Can I help somehow with it?"
Aoi shrugged, clenched her freshly bandaged hand several times to test the agility. "Just don't tell me you wanna join. I'm so not training you."
"No, I'm thinking about the organization, actually. Boss suggested I should try myself at it." Big violet orbs finally met narrowed charcoal ones.
Aoi felt something akin to jealousy. "Orga? Well, go ahead, then. Still, I'm not sure how I can help you. Yeah, the idea was originally mine but everyone supported it with their own concepts and thoughts. The simple contest seems to grow up into quite a massive event, while I'm just training guys now, nothing more. I've heard Biscuit has it all planning, maybe you should ask him."
Kudelia nodded in understanding. "Thank you. However, considering this is your idea, I suggest you've taken part in such contests before, haven't you? Maybe your experience could be..."
"Unlikely." Aoi interrupted coldly, glaring at the girl opposite her with intimidating arrogance. "Gjallarhorn doesn't fuck around, you know."
Kudelia averted her eyes. "Sorry, I didn't mean to..."
"Forget it." Aoi cut her quietly. "How could you know, really." She wrapped her hands around the plastic cup, trying to warm them up; inhaled bitter fragrance and added. "Gjallarhorn never arranged contests of any kind for their lab rats. Only the competitions. Survival ones."
Kudelia sighed. "I'm sorry. I've seen enough of their crimes in Martian Sphere to assume that exactly. Please, take my apologies."
"Nah, don't mention that." Aoi sipped her coffee.
"If it makes you feel any better, one could say that it's Gjallarhorn's excess influence I'm fighting against." Kudelia noted softly.
"It doesn't. But thanks anyway." Aoi watched her reflection in the remains of black liquid, thinking about Orga's offer to help the Maiden with teaching Tekkadan kids.
"Ms Kudelia..." Words got stuck in her throat.
"What is it?" The blond girl smiled supportively.
"Can I help you with teaching kids? I'm not certain what would be the best since my education is quite chaotic... Mythology and fiction are my specialties, you could say."
"Oh." Kudelia glanced down in a futile attempt to hide her surprise. "That's... really nice of you. Well..." She stuttered, obviously confused.
Awkward silence hung between them. Aoi tightened her lips, feeling incredibly stupid.
Big violet eyes met hers again.
"Can I ask you a personal question?" Kudelia inquired firmly.
"Shoot." Aoi involuntary clenched her fists.
"Why do you enjoy reading fiction? I, um... thought you'd be more... pragmatic."
"Because it helps to ease the stress." Aoi heard herself saying quietly. "While reading fiction you can live an imaginary life, in an unreal world, as an inexistent person. Without the responsibilities for your actions."
The eyes of the blond girl sparkled with resolve. "Then, could you please read bedtime stories for the younger kids? They often cry at night; because of the stress, because they miss their parents or friends... Fiction tales could distract them, improve their vocabulary and speech manners. That's what the good book for."
Aoi scratched her chin.
"That I can do. Not sure about improving the manners, but certainly I won't screw the bedtime reading up, right?"
Kudelia smiled openly. "I guess so."
The doors slid open to let Eugene and Shino in. Both looked clearly annoyed with each other.
"Aoi!" Shino exclaimed. "You're the one that I need!"
"Yeah, whatever." Eugene grunted. "You won't get your money unless I see it with my own eyes."
But Shino had already made himself comfortable at Aoi's table and spoke confidently. "Aoi, you should let that douche bag realize how much of a douche bag he really is. Tell him the truth."
"The truth?.." Aoi echoed, dumbfounded.
"Yeah. About you and Orga. Together. In the locked cockpit." Shino winked.
Aoi felt as if all of her blood exploded in her head.
Kudelia gasped.
Atra pressed her hands against her mouth.
Merribit smirked.
"That was... just training. For the tournament. Nothing more." Aoi's voice sounded weak even to her own ears.
"Huh! I knew that! No money for you, Norba, until you give me the solid proof." Eugene beamed.
"Hey Aoi, that's not fair! I saw you both! You looked guilty as sin!"
But Aoi already found the steady ground.
"Think whatever you want, Shino. You saw nothing because there was nothing to see, that's the truth. Moreover, I think this whole bet thing is disgusting. Even with the upcoming tournament you still have nothing better to do!"
"I'm doing enough." Shino huffed. "I even came up with the idea for the winner's prize. Should I mention that nobody supported it?"
Aoi raised her eyebrow. "Should I even try to guess what it was?"
"Huh! Not in your lifetime, girl. A courtesy title, of course. Like, Super-Mega-Topnotch-Mobile-Suit-Ace-Pilot!"
Aoi thought into it, then finished her coffee.
"That's incredibly stupid. But you're actually right about the winner's prize idea." She said at last. "However... what kind of reward would be suitable? Money? Tekkadan doesn't have spare grands."
Shino smiled mischievously. "No, money's too primitive. How about your kiss, Aoi? The one who wins gets to kiss you."
"Yeah, surprisingly this time my dear friend Shino makes perfect sense!" Eugene exclaimed with redden cheeks, wrapping one arm around Shino's neck.
Aoi huffed. "And what if I win? No, not fair. I refuse."
They all looked at Kudelia.
"Though, the idea..." Shino managed.
"Yeah..." Eugene blushed into various shades of red.
"Ms Kudelia, please, be our main prize and kiss the winner!" Shino pled.
"Yes, Ms Kudelia, please!" Eugene echoed.
The blond girl's cheeks glowed with rosy color. "Well... I... Shouldn't you discuss it first? Maybe the majority won't support this idea."
"I definitely won't." Aoi groaned. "It's just one useless shit after another."
"You can quit anytime, girl." Shino smiled. "No one wants to fight you anyway. Rumor has it you can kill for real even in the simulator."
"But Ms Kudelia's right." Eugene noted thoughtfully. "We should discuss that idea with Orga, Biscuit and other members of Tekkadan. The Turbines, too. Are you sure you wanna do this, Ms Kudelia? To kiss the winner, that is."
"I... I think I don't mind. Tekkadan is my family now. I'll be glad to help." Kudelia smiled shyly, and even Aoi fell under a spell of her remarkable beauty. The pilot girl couldn't help but imagine Orga's lips merging with that perfect mouth in a passionate kiss.
Aoi stared downwards, trying to hide bitter pangs of jealousy piercing her heart.
She's so much better than me. Beautiful and sweet but also strong and purposeful. More congenial to Orga, let's face it. But unlike her, I can fight to protect him. All of them.
The Isaribi's warning signals alerted everyone in the mess hall.
Atra hurried to clean up the tables while Merribit was calmly securing the pot and other stuff in the cooking area.
Eugene cursed and stormed out of the mess hall, outrunning Shino on his way to the bridge.
Aoi sprinted straight to the hangar. Without the Barbatos and Graze aboard, her Mobile Suit was the only available fighting unit; and she considered that fact reasonable enough to break Orga's stay-away from the hangar order.
The girl swiftly changed into her pilot suit right next to the Gremory's opened cockpit, completely oblivious to curious glances from Tekkadan members.
She pushed herself into the pilot chair, heard the familiar click of the Alaya-Vijnana interface and initiated the Gremory's boot process. After loading the data, Aoi manually checked the systems, including the recent upgrades. With her freshly acquired 130mm assault rifle and 80mm handgun, with the menacing scythe attached to the Gremory's back, the pilot girl was locked and loaded and ready for take-off.
I have to protect them. Now.
When you ain't got nothing, you got nothing to lose.
"This is Aoi, Gundam Gremory, ready to launch."
The brunette woman on the communication screen looked confused. She glanced aside, then hesitantly returned her stare to Aoi.
Fumitan Admoss, that's her name. I'm surprised that our princess's companion cooperates as a signal officer. Seems, like maids nowadays receive quite the training.
"De... Denied." The woman stuttered finally.
"What the fuck?!" Aoi's fist punched the side panel. "Who are you to decide that, four-eyes? Let me out or I'll blow up the way myself!"
Orga's face appeared on the communication screen, making her sulk instantly.
"That's my order." His jawline hardened, anxiety and anger flashed in narrowed lemony eyes. "They didn't teach you discipline in Gjallarhorn, Ms Aoi?"
"Yes... I mean, no... Sorry, sir. They did." Aoi wanted nothing but to die of shame.
"Stay put in case of more hostiles getting around. Mika, Lafter and Azee went after Akihiro and Takaki. You and Amida are in reserve. That's all." Orga looked the other way.
"Wait, Orga! Isn't Mikazuki at Saisei? And why Takaki is out there?" Aoi's voice raised almost an octave.
Orga's stare was as heavy as her sudden guilt. "Mika's just returned. As for Takaki... Hope you can ask him yourself."
Aoi gritted her teeth. "Roger that, sir."
Time crawled with grace of a drunken slug. Guilt and impatience were washing over Aoi in heavy surges, making her anxious and unfocused. That's why when Akihiro's Graze finally appeared in the hangar she didn't even notice Takaki's Mobile Worker at first.
Though, the mangled wreckage hardly reminded of a Mobile Worker now. While Tekkadan guys were trying to crack it open, Aoi hastily rummaged through the Gremory's emergency compartment for the first aid kit. She accurately pulled out two auto-injectors and propelled herself down the hangar floor, just in time to get near Takaki's unconscious body.
For the first time Aoi praised Gjallarhorn training and real-life simulation of such cases.
"Blood transfusion kit." She cut calmly, pulling the zipper of Takaki's suit down his neck and injecting blood coagulation stimulator.
"Medical bay ready?" Aoi requested next, slowly inserting the second injection and trying not to look at Takaki's blanched face, at thick smudges of blood covering white skin.
The kid looks even paler than me. Must be internal bleeding, major one. But Gjallarhorn drugs proved to be effective enough. I can do that.
"Power to the medical room." She heard Orga's voice clear and loud. "Doctor's on the way from Aniki's ship."
"Good."
Aoi started to unzip the kid's suit further down, to initiate the blood transfusion procedure. Thick bright red droplets scattered around her in a chaotic dance, leaving bloodstains on the suit, marking the gloves, sealing the face. Wetting her hair.
Everyone stood still.
Time stood still.
Takaki was out there because of me...
Stop it. It doesn't matter. I can reminisce later; right now I've got a job to do.
"Where's that fucking transfusion kit?" She snarled, breaking the heavy silence and turning around.
Calm cobalt eyes met her heated glare.
They continued the procedure together with Merribit, working in silent coordination as though such incidents happened to them on a daily basis; and Aoi felt a surge of gratitude towards the adult woman who supported her at that crucial moment.
"Okay now." Merribit said. "Let's take him to the infirmary. Slow and easy. Everyone, move on!"
"You don't have a doctor on board? You aren't doing your job as the Boss." Merribit stated, looking at Orga pointedly.
He didn't object.
Aoi saw Tekkadan leader tightening his lips and glancing away. The adult woman's accusation seemed obviously unproductive at the moment; but Merribit was clearly right, and everyone in the infirmary understood that. However, nobody uttered a word in her support or disapproval: Ride stubbornly mumbled something unintelligible under his nose; Akihiro didn't move a muscle, continuing to stare at Takaki's still body; Aoi huffed but also kept silent, observing the doctor's manipulations. The medic, of course, happened to be one of Naze's wives, Ms Noi.
The pilot girl sighed and shook her head.
Those ladies... How can she even wear high heels in zero gravity?.. Beauty knows no pain, really.
Tall albino figure, dressed in white skin-tight gown and stiletto heels, turned to silently waiting Tekkadan members.
"So, considering the patient's young age and well-timed first aid, I think you should expect full and fast recovery. Please, maintain the current therapy and provide him with complete rest." Ms Noi slightly bowed her head. "Don't hesitate to call me anytime, Mr Itsuka."
"Thank you." Orga strode to the young woman and shook her hand. They were almost the same height. "Let me see you off."
Ms Noi followed Orga to the doors, leaving behind the unusual in space feminine sound of high heels.
Her positive resolution dissolved the tension in the medical bay, taking off the heavy burden of guilt everyone shared after the incident. Ride run to the doors, announcing on his way out that he should share the good news with everyone. Merribit rolled her eyes but smiled gently.
"I'm going to the mess hall," she said, "to try out that team work of a dinner I'm responsible for. Don't forget your meals, guys."
"Uh-huh." Aoi uttered, without glancing at the older woman.
Even if she's right... There are different ways to voice one's concern.
All of a sudden, there were only Aoi and Akihiro left in the infirmary.
The girl hesitantly glanced at the pilot's huge frame silently towering over the Medical Nanomachine tank.
"Akihiro." She said quietly. "I'm sorry. I should be out there instead of you. Takaki wouldn't get hurt. It's... It's my fault, not yours."
He turned to stare at the girl, then lowered his eyes. "In fact, I'm glad I was there. Especially now, when Takaki's health isn't in any danger. You see, among the enemies... Well, one of them was my little brother, Masahiro. Years ago we were sold as Human Debris separately; and though I promised to find him one day, I've already lost any hope to keep my word. But now... At least, now I know Masahiro is alive."
Aoi nodded thoughtfully. "Maybe, you should talk to Orga about it? Masahiro's your family; isn't it a nice chance for you to reunite? This time as Tekkadan."
Akihiro sighed. "Human Debris aren't supposed to have family. Today I understood that, too. I guess I always knew that; but having so much fun with Tekkadan lately made me forget about who I really am."
Aoi smiled softly and shrugged. "And who you really are?.. For me, you're my brother, you know. Same goes for everyone else, I'm sure. Oh well, with Lafter being the exception, of course. By the way, what about that training of yours?" She couldn't help but wink.
Akihiro blushed slightly. "But... Under such circumstances..."
"What circumstances? You've heard the doctor - Takaki needs complete rest now, nothing more. And Ride most certainly won't leave his best friend for long." Aoi poked him with her elbow.
"Let's grab some food first, then." Akihiro stared at the girl pointedly, reminding Aoi of her disgusting breakfast.
She heard her stomach snarling loudly in hunger and smiled shyly. "Deal, bro."
