The Talk; the Tattling-like version and aftermath

"Now Lincoln, can you guess what we're doing today?" Lori put on her sing-song voice, it was in the early afternoon and they were in his room. The rest of the family had been easily convinced to leave them behind, Lori and Luna valiantly volunteering for babysitter duty after Lincoln had mysteriously started exhibiting bad luck symptoms again.

They were really well timed ones too, almost like they'd been made and set off with borrowed prank equipment,

Lincoln looked up to Lori with eyes that seemed to have receded slightly into their sockets. "p-pull o-out!"

"That's right!" She patted his head. "We're practicing the Pull Out Method again!"

Things had progressed to so much worse than the oranges across the next few weeks. Every time they escalated Lori would threaten to bring Bobby in to show him how to do the thing in person, and after one demonstration too many Lincoln was under no illusions that Bobby wouldn't;

A: Do WHATEVER Lori wanted.

B: Do whatever she wanted TO HIM as well.

So when they'd progressed to 'live models' for cunnilingus practice ("Oh yeah brah, really get-EEEP!") he'd resisted only a little. When they'd gone to outright 'sex practice', he'd pushed back harder until Lori showed him what Bobby was willing to do under her 'persuasion'. Thus he now lived with his the memories of his first time accompanied with banjo sounds added by his subconscious.

Now...

"Okay twerp, up until this point we've been using condoms since neither of us wants your dick snot in us," Luna nodded with Lori's assertion. "But for this practice you really need to be bare in order for it to actually work."

His eyes widened a bit. "B-but what a-about-"

"Gross incest babies?" Lori shuddered. "Yeah, here's how it's going to work; you're going to get each of us to our 'happy place', take the pressure from it without giving in and then pull out and go into a tissue. If you 'go' before then, you get to pay for Plan B each time as an incentive not to be a quick shot."

"Yeah dude, gotta learn to keep it up for the ladies." Luna confirmed.

"I-I thought the both of you were on the pill!" Lincoln burst out, knowing how quickly his savings could run dry. "A-and I don't want to-"

"Pay? Well in real life it could be eighteen years of child support, so as far as I'm concerned we're literally doing you favour." Lori examined her nails.

"Yeah dude, gonna have to pay us back somehow!" Luna snickered, and advanced on the boy...


An hour later Sam and Luna were down stairs, Luna regaling her girlfriend with tales of her hardcore bullying session.

"Jeeze babe, that's cold." Sam laughed. "I know you're on the pill to beat back Bloody Mary anyway!"

"Yeah, but this way he'll be ready in real life and we get paid too!" Luna slurped down some coffee. "Ahhh, so do you want in on this or..."

Sam shrugged. "Maybe, we'll have to see if Simon learns as fast as Lincoln."


Aftermath:

"But Lincoln I thought Orange was your favourite colour- you just have that black 'funny business' shirt otherwise!" Lynn Sr protested as his only son dumped the last of his orange shirts into the goodwill bin.

Lincoln shuddered and turned back to him with a single tear running down his cheek. "It was Dad.

It was."


Years later:

A teenage girl sighed in contentment, an older Lincoln comfortable next to her:

"Lincoln I'm amazed, how did you know how to do that thing with your tongue?"

"My sister's a Lesbian so she insisted I learn."

"... Your sister made you learn cunnilingus?"

" Yeah, she and my other sister held me down and made me, and made me learn other things afterwars. They stole my toys to blackmail me too- good times!"

"... I think we should see other people.


A/N: This sequel is non-canon to the previous ficlet given that the sisters are more Tattling-esque than their orginal selves, but I do like to indulge in that dark humour every now then :P