Sweaty Sam:

Visiting the Loud House was always a trying experience for Sam Sharp. Not only did it live up its name, with a total of thirteen permanent residents, but the chaos the extroverted eccentrics that made up the majority of those residents induced with their daily shenanigans regularly coalesced into a maelstrom of madness that Luna liked to call 'Loud Episodes'.

Unlike most people who might have considered that their greatest concern upon entry into the managed mayhem of the household though; Sam Sharp had a very different problem.

"Oh Bobby Boo Boo Bear," Lori sighed in her breathy voice, lounging on the couch in a way that left her full, round girls swelling up with each breath she inhaled to whisper her womanly tones . "You always know how to cheer me up."

It was the way Lori popped the last 'p' of up that did it, that swelled one of the beads of sweat coming from Sam's brow and caused it to trickle down her temple, past her cheek to tickle her throat. Seated on Sam's right was her ever lovable and charming (sometimes charmingly silly) girlfriend, babbling about a song they were (theoretically) working on together.

"So yeah I think the composition could use a little more work, but that means we'd have to redo the instrumentals here…."

Luna voice faded out as Sam's concentration wavered. It wasn't something she was proud of, but she couldn't help it; it wasn't just the wondrously well developed Lori that distracted her with her curves, voice and older girl domineering waiting to impress its commands upon the less voluptuous girl. Rather it was every teen and above member of Luna's sickeningly hot family.

In the corner, Luan Loud was entertaining the two the thankfully yet-to-blossom twins. Alas; while Luan's charms were still growing in, her easy words and silly puns only enticed the listener in for the kill that her dazzling laugh would deliver.

Behind them she could hear the innocently intoxicating Leni Loud, clad in only her seafoam green dress. The blonde beauty seduced by sight alone with her deliciously toned bare legs, sweeping down into masterfully sculped ankles and perfectly painted toenails. Of course they were a mercy compared to the bubbly bright expression of the pretty girl above, guaranteed to melt the heart of any would be enemy with feelings of warmth and protectiveness only matched by the dirty desire to see how long it would take to melt the innocence out of her with-

Sam shook her head to try and escape the predatory pervyness gripping her insides.

"I don't think it works neither," her faithful girlfriend sighed, scribbling over some lines. "Maybe if we…"

Sam tried to keep her in focus, she really did; but you don't put an addict in a room of drugs for a reason. Temptation would melt even the strongest of wills, and while Sam might have been a strong person at some point; that was before multiple visits to this cursed, wonderful household repeatedly tore apart her restraint and resolve until it was a wispy shred of respectability.

Case in point; when Sam had first come over, she'd only noticed that Lynn Loud was an attractive girl for her age under all the grime and stink. Now after multiple trips to This Place she knew exactly how high the girl's jersey would jump if she needed to headbutt a soccer ball, even now she could spot the younger girl speeding along outside, her face glistening with freshly exerted dew…

"Oh hello Sam, would you like a drink?" Sam was taken from her reverie but the dreaded sight of the full bodied, matured woman that was Rita Loud.

She had clearly just come in from grocery shopping, and stood in the doorway with some bags being taken by her husband. A single glance would let anyone with a hint of 'affection' know exactly why Rita had been able to spawn so many children; her hips flared magnificently, her breasts were full and ripe for either nurturing or play. Her motherly face bore signs of wear, but seemed to only give her a matured beauty to her that made something in Sam coo for something both maternal and commanding-

"I think she's a bit busy as the moment," Lynn senior chuckled as he took another bag from his wife. The man himself wasn't what Sam usually went for, but despite himself he wasn't gross. A bit paunchy and lacking the overt charms of his wife and daughters, his laughter and easy charm drew Sam in and made her feel safe and cosy. But once upon a time he had fathered all of the children running around this house, and once- just once- Sam had seem his expression shift when he thought no one was looking and the confident sexuality he'd shot through his eyes at his wife both utterly obliterated Sam's mental image of him as a safe, comfortable man and somehow enhanced it as some veneer of a masterful man playing his cards to lure in prey-

"So Sam, watch'a think?"

"Hmm?" Sam diverted her attention back to her girlfriend. "Oh right- it's great babe!"

Luna narrowed her eyes, "what part?"

"Hunh?"

"What part was so great?" Luna clarified, drumming fingers on the couch arm. "The lyrics or the instrumentals?"

"Ahh, instrumentals babe," Sam grinned. "No can jam out like you-"

"Thanks Sam," Luna sighed. "The thing is though; I was talkin' about the venue for the past five minutes!"

Sam wilted, "sorry Lunes…"

Luna looked at her with an unimpressed expression that told her Luna knew exactly why she'd been so distracted. "You wanna head to the garage?"

It wasn't really a question, Luna's family was off limits after all. A little looking was fine, Luna wasn't frigging blind even if she didn't feel the same pull (Sam hoped, even without the whole incest thing there was no way for the blonde to compete!); but ignoring her in favour of a making a show from the zoo that was her family home was out of the question.

"Yeah, sure babe…" Sam unsteadily got up, wincing internally as her too-warm undies pulled at sensitive places.

Alas; for all her good intentions to avert her gaze away from any of Luna's sexy siblings for the rest of the day, as she turned to face the doorway she caught sight of two things.

One was Leni Loud, bouncing with glee over something; probably the second person currently taking up Sam's vision. For while normally Leni's jiggly chest would pull her eyes, jealous Luna or not, there was something even better in sight.

The second, much shorter person bore a pair of skin tight purple yoga pants with some kind of print on them, but this person either had forgotten their underwear or was so gifted in the trunk that it didn't matter. Whoever they were, they were currently letting their full, fantastically crafted ass display its full cleavage for all the word to see.

It was a cleft made like someone had pressed two hamburger buns together and squeezed, but there was no sign of tension in the clear plush softness of the bearers cheeks. Instead they bounced a little as the owner waved their hands around like they were trying to get Leni's attention-

"Sam, you're friggin' droolin' over my kid brother." Luna's whispered hiss slapped Sam out of her examination, and sure enough; above the Crevice of Wonder was an orange shirt and the snowy white hair that denoted Luna's only brother.

"Oooh," Sam moaned, holding her face in her hands. "This is so messed up…"

"Yeah well; let's get ya to the garage before we have to ask ya to take a seat," Luna snorted a bit and pushed her sweaty girlfriend past the door, leaving whatever shenanigans that had lead Leni to dress up Lincoln in Lori's old pants behind.