A/N: Hi! Hope you enjoy. Title from "Never Say Never" by The Fray


After work, Tohru hesitates on the sidewalk.

Kyo hasn't texted her all day. Thursdays are his busiest day at the dojo, so it's to be expected. But…she wants to see him. Would it be rude to just go over to his apartment unannounced? Are they at a point where they can do that sort of thing? Should she just call first?

She reaches into her bag for her phone, then stops herself.

She shouldn't be this afraid to just surprise her boyfriend, should she? It's not like Kyo has anything to hide at his apartment; she's been there dozens of times, and there's never been even a trace of anyone else. Knocking on his door doesn't mean impending doom.

She takes a deep breath and starts off toward the station.

About an hour later, she's at Kyo's door, her purse in one hand and a bag of the Chinese takeout he loves so much in her other.

Kyo opens the door, looking a little confused about having a visitor, but his face immediately lights up when he sees who it is. That instantly makes it worth the nerves she'd endured to get here.

"Hey, you," he says. He leans forward and puts a hand on her waist, then kisses her.

"Hi," she says, grinning back at him. "I brought dinner."

"God, I love you," he says playfully. She giggles. He takes the bag from her, and she follows him into the apartment.

"I just got home, so I haven't showered. Sorry," he warns her.

"Like I care about that, you weirdo."

He rolls his eyes dramatically at weirdo. "Okay, weirdo. Let's eat, then."

"Yes, please."

They curl up on the couch with the containers of food between them.

"I was thinking…" he says, then pauses.

"What?" she asks.

He busies himself with opening the first container and then breaking his chopsticks. "Do you maybe wanna come by the dojo tomorrow after work? The kids will all be gone, but I could show you around, since you haven't been there in a while. Then we can come back here."

Tohru snaps her own chopsticks. A little uneven. She sighs. "I think I'll have to stay late tomorrow."

"Yeah?" he asks. He sounds a little disappointed, so she reaches out and squeezes his hand briefly before digging into the food.

"Yeah. My boss said everyone has to come in. Has some announcements, apparently."

"Huh? Why wouldn't he just wait until next month's meeting? It's almost April anyway."

Tohru shrugs, swallows her bite of chicken, then chews on the end of one chopstick absentmindedly. She has half a mind to just skip the announcements and leave early. Whatever the big news is, it's not going to affect her—she's leaving in just over a week. But she knows she'd feel guilty, anyway.

"Weird."

"Weird," she agrees. "But just about a week and I'll be out of there. Then…" She pauses and transfers the takeout boxes to the coffee table so she can move closer to Kyo. He wraps his arms around her and kisses her cheek, waiting for her to finish. "I'll get to be at the dojo with you every day. Do you think I'll be able to watch you teach sometimes?"

"Yeah, sure, if you want to. I'm sure you'll like all the little kids."

She smiles and turns her head to him, slanting her lips across his. When they break apart, she nods her agreement. "And seeing you with the little kids," she admits quietly.

He raises an eyebrow. "Oh yeah? Why's that?"

Tohru feels a blush start across her cheeks, but she forces the words out anyway, because she thinks—no, knows—they'll make him happy. "A glimpse into our future."

He smiles, his own cheeks reddening. "I'm not, like, impressive with them or anything."

"I'm sure you are," she insists.

He groans, rubs at the back of his neck awkwardly. "Don't get your hopes up too high, okay? They get the better of me sometimes. Especially the middle school kids."

"Middle schoolers are hard."

"Are they? Any more than normal?"

She leans forward to gather more noodles onto her chopsticks. "Well, yes. Don't you remember what it was like to be a middle schooler?"

"I…wasn't exactly a normal middle schooler," he points out.

"Oh. Right."

"And knowing you, I doubt you were, either."

She puffs her cheeks out into a fake pout. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Kyo pokes her cheek. "You're just…definitely not a normal person."

"Wow. Thanks," she teases.

"Let me finish. You're prettier, smarter, and more loving than anyone else on the planet. I'm sure middle school was no different."

She smiles at him. He reaches out and cradles her face in his palm. "You're so sweet, Kyo-kun."

"Nah," he says, kissing the tip of her nose. "Just honest. Anyway, so no dojo tomorrow. But wanna come over anyway? I could pick you up when you get off."

"I don't know the exact time I'll get to leave."

He shrugs. "So? I'll wait."

She scoots closer, rests her forehead on his shoulder. "What did I do to deserve you?" She feels him take a deep breath, and she tilts her head, kissing his collarbone. "Don't overthink that," she says.

He nods a little. "You deserve anything and everything that makes you happy."

Tohru smiles, then nuzzles her face against the crook of his neck in an attempt to hide her blush. "You do, too."


Work begins uneventfully. Tohru had hoped she could listen to any office chatter to get hints about what the announcements might be, but there's only one other person in the office today. Since people have to end the work day here, they're probably all out in the field trying to get as much done as possible beforehand.

Around 4:50, her boss comes to her desk. "Tohru-kuuuun," he says, smiling at her. She returns it. Her boss is nice. Like, really nice. Even so, his focus is still on work most of the time. But Tohru doesn't know how to handle the bouts of unprofessionalism it also occasionally causes. Like this: kun; she doesn't necessarily mind, but it's unusual for a workplace.

"Hi, sir."

"I meant to mention this to you earlier, but we've been busy, so it got pushed off until now. I got your two weeks' notice. Next Tuesday will be your last day, yes?"

"Yes, sir. If that's alright."

"I'm sad to see you go, but I always knew you were meant for bigger things. What's your next adventure?"

Tohru hesitates for just a moment before answering, "I'll be doing administrative work for a local dojo." Her boss has never given her anything to worry about. It doesn't matter if he knows where she's going; he's just a nice, middle-aged man with pictures of his wife and kids on his desk.

His eyebrows shoot up. "A dojo, huh? You don't seem like the type who'd be into martial arts. No disrespect meant."

Tohru laughs a little. With her delicate frame and docile demeanor, she's heard things similar before and takes no offense. "Well…no, but my boyfriend's family is. They own the dojo, so…"

Her boss smiles a little at boyfriend, but he doesn't mention it. "Ah, interesting. What's the name of it? I wonder if I know it. My son is into martial arts. And thank god, because it gets rid of some of his energy." He blows out a big breath and shakes his head.

Tohru smiles at that; she's sure that must have been how Kazuma felt when Kyo was young. "The Sohma Dojo."

"Mmm, that one? My son competes with students from that dojo a lot. They're all really tough. Well, good luck Tohru. We'll miss having you around here."

The bell on the door jingles, and people start flooding in.

"Look at you, all right on time," her boss calls out.

"Hey, we're always very punctual," a familiar voice says back, tone sarcastic. Tohru looks up, meets eyes with Itsuki for just a second, then turns away.

"Bullshit, Yamada." The room erupts in laughter. This is another one of those moments Tohru doesn't know what to do with, so she zones herself out for a minute. She tries not to think about Itsuki being across the room. She hasn't had to see him since that night a few weeks ago. She feels a little shaken by his presence, but she's pleased to notice that it's not as much as she had expected. Maybe leaving this place really will do her a lot of good.

Her boss claps his hands together, snapping her out of it.

"Thanks for coming, everyone. I know it's a hassle to get you all into the office at the same time. But some important changes are going to take place soon."

He continues, jumping into a discussion about financials that Tohru doesn't understand nor have any part in. She only tunes back in when she hears her name.

"And lastly, Tohru-kun here is going to be leaving us. She'll be working at the Sohma Dojo, so if any of you guys want to get into better shape, go see her," he laughs. He rubs her shoulder. His tone and his touch are gentle, but Tohru feels as though she's going to pass out.

She looks to Itsuki, who's still standing by the door, but now with an eyebrow raised slightly. It's such a subtle change in expression that you wouldn't notice it—not unless you knew him well enough to look for it, that is. She blinks, trying to clear the dark spots out of her vision. She can't faint, not here in front of all her coworkers, in front of him. If she wants to look like even more of an idiot than she already has in this office, that would be how to do it. She grips the edge of her desk. Itsuki's eyes follow the movement of her fingers. It's a small shift in her stance that no one in the room notices, but him, she's sure; because just like her, he knows what to look for.

"That's all, everyone. Good work, and I'll see you on Monday." Everyone disperses, no one even slightly interested in anything he'd just said about Tohru. That's a relief, at least.

He turns to her and lowers his voice. "I hope you didn't mind me saying that. You've just been here so long, I felt like I had to let everyone know." Tohru can't do anything but smile and give him a slight nod. He nods back and walks off, and Tohru immediately sinks down into her chair.

She's vaguely aware of the fact that Itsuki is the only person left in the room now, and that he's walking over to her, and she should leave before he gets over here. But she can't move. Can't breathe, can't think. All she can do is sit there feeling lightheaded and nauseous.

"Are you okay?" Itsuki asks.

Tohru can't tell if she's going to pass out anymore, or just throw up. Maybe both. She presses the back of her hand to her mouth and forces herself to swallow.

"Tohru?" he presses.

"Fine," she chokes out. "I'm fine."

"You don't look fine."

"Well, I am."

"Well, then…" he pauses and runs a hand through his hair, clearly feeling a little awkward. "Since you're leaving, I guess this is one of my last chances to talk to you. You blocked my number and all." If she were feeling like her normal self, she'd know exactly where this is going. But now she just watches him, feeling sick and stupid. "Well, I just…I'm so sorry, Tohru. You didn't deserve any of that. I was stupid, is my only excuse. I tried to apologize a couple weeks ago because it was six months to the day that you left me. And I've been trying really hard to get my shit together since then. I don't see her anymore. I miss you. And I want—"

She laughs a little, the sound bitter and rough. She'd gotten drawn into it for a second—into his pretty words, and the way they flow so perfectly out of his mouth. Kyo was right; Itsuki's real objective is to just win her back, probably so he can have an easy lay on hand .

She's such an idiot.

She stands up and reaches for her bag, making to leave, but she almost immediately has to sit back down.

"Do you need some water or something?" he asks, laying a hand on her arm.

She stiffens at the contact and shakes her head, which only makes her even dizzier. She cringes against the onslaught of vertigo, but forces out, "I need you to get away from me."

"Tohru, I'm just trying—"

And suddenly she's back in their apartment, and she's back in the lobby of the building a few weeks ago, and all she can hear is the rest of the sentence, whether it's actually accurate or not— "to apologize."

And now she's crying.

"Go away," she chokes out. "Just leave, go away. Please. Please."

"I'm not going to leave you when you're looking like this," he says, tone sharp. He rubs his hand up and down her arm. She's never hated being touched as much as she does right now. "Do you want me to call someone? That guy or something?"

At the mention of Kyo, she just cries harder. She can't talk at all anymore. He's probably downstairs waiting for her by now. All she has to do is make it outside and into his arms, and everything will be okay. But she can't move. She didn't want Itsuki to know she was quitting. She wanted to just go quietly, didn't want anyone to know, but especially not him. What if he tries to follow her? How could she be so stupid, telling her boss exactly where she's going? She always does this—gives kindness and politeness when there's no hope of getting any back in return.

Itsuki leans in and reaches out, then, taking her face between his hands. "Tohru, hey," he says. "Look at me."

She doesn't answer, can't answer; she just brings her hands up to his and lays them on his wrists. She wants to push him away, but she can't tell if she's even moving her hands or essentially just letting them rest there.

The bell on the door rings. Both Itsuki and Tohru turn toward it, but Tohru can't see her through her tears. She tries desperately to blink them away. The person in the doorway is quiet for a moment, and then Tohru sees orange as her eyes clear just a bit.

Kyo.

"What's going on?" he asks, and his voice is so steady and cold that it honestly terrifies her, even though she's sure it's not directed at her.

"She's sick. Or having a panic attack, or something. I don't know." Itsuki pulls his hands away and takes a few steps back, making room for Kyo to come in next to her. He hurries over and kneels down next to her chair.

"Hey," he says softly. She's still unable to breathe; she just sits there and trembles, lungs fighting for air. He reaches out and touches her hand. She jumps, and he jerks back. "Okay, I won't touch you," he assures her. "It's okay." Then he turns to Itsuki, and his tone becomes icy again. "What the hell did you do to her?"

"What? Nothing. She got like this when our boss told us all she's quitting. I only asked if she wanted me to call you."

"What?" Kyo mumbles. He shakes his head and stands, probably figuring he'll get better details from Tohru herself, later. He picks up her bag. His next words look like they pain him, but he says them anyway: "Thanks, I guess?"

Itsuki nods a little, crossing his arms over his chest.

Tohru manages to get her hands up to her eyes, and she rubs the remaining tears away. Now that Kyo's here, even though her lungs still feel like they're on fire and she's dizzy and sick to her stomach, she at least doesn't feel the need to cry anymore. But now that she can finally see Kyo's expression clearly, she wishes she couldn't. She can't really read it. He looks so sad. Hurt, almost.

"Can I touch you now?" he whispers. She nods. He reaches out and takes her hand, pulls her up to her feet. "Let's go."

They almost make it to the door, but then Itsuki clears his throat. They pause. "I will warn you, though, that I told her I want her back."

Kyo rolls his eyes and starts walking again, still leading Tohru along. "Good luck with that," he says. Then his face hardens. It looks like he's considering something. Tohru wants to ask what, because it doesn't look like it could possibly be good, but she doesn't know if she can find her voice yet. So they walk in silence, take the train in silence, and then head up the stairs to her apartment in silence.

Kyo digs through her bag for her keys. As he unlocks the door, Tohru notices that his hands are trembling. They step into the genkan, and Tohru grabs his hand. He immediately lays down her bag and starts looking her over, lifting her arms and pushing her hair back from her neck, like he's examining her for injuries.

"What happened?" he asks.

Tohru sniffles a little. He opens his arms. "Just a panic attack, I guess," she says, leaning into his chest. Her voice is gravelly from crying, still, and the way it tremors makes her feel small and pathetic. She tries to ignore it and just wraps her arms around Kyo, instead.

"But why?"

"M-my boss…he told everyone that I'm leaving, and exactly where I'm going. I didn't want anyone to know."

Kyo's quiet for a moment, just holding her and rubbing her back. "The name of the dojo and everything?" he asks. Tohru nods.

"I won't let anything happen to you, Tohru. You know that, right? And neither would Kunimitsu or Master. If anyone shows up looking for you, they're gonna pay for it."

She nods again. "I know. Thank you, Kyo-kun." And she really does know that. She knows that Kyo would put her life on the line for her, if necessary, but it doesn't really make her feel better, in this moment. She doesn't want him to have to.

He presses a kiss to the top of her head. "I love you," he says, but it sounds a little sad. She knows he doesn't like seeing her upset. Guilt stabs at her ribs; she's worried him. Again.

"I love you, too. So much."

He takes her to bed, laying down next to her after she's in pajamas and under the covers. "Do you want me to stay?" he asks.

At the realization that he might leave, her eyes fly open wide. She reaches out and grabs his wrist, the movement so fast and her grip so tight that Kyo startles. "Please don't leave," she says, voice tight.

"Okay," he says. "I won't go anywhere, then."

And he doesn't; he keeps his word. He holds her all night. As she finally drifts off to sleep, she thinks fleetingly that being in his arms right now might be the safest she's ever felt.


The next day, Kyo takes Tohru to the dojo. Kazuma's planning on training her, and Tohru had canceled lunch with Uo because this was one of the only times Kazuma could squeeze her into his schedule. The whole way to the dojo, Kyo suggested that they just cancel this too—Master wouldn't be bothered—but even though Tohru still seems spacey and a little down, she argues with him about how rude that would be. She gets her way, naturally—Stubborn Tohru is a force to be reckoned with, and Kyo doesn't have the energy today. The air between them is tight enough, as it is; Tohru's embarrassed about last night, and Kyo's holding onto a bruised ego from it. He doesn't need to make things worse.

Hugs and pleasantries are exchanged, then when Kazuma pulls her off to the little office she'll be working in, Kyo changes into his gi and tries to get some practice in with the punching bag, since no students are in right now. Inevitably, his mind wanders.

Kick.

Fuck that Itsuki guy. Kyo's not at all worried about him possibly coming to the dojo, but what is he doing, trying to get back with Tohru after he hurt her so badly? Time and time again, he's done nothing but destroy her, then leave her alone to try and pick up the pieces. And now he thinks he deserves her back?

Punch.

And then he just goes and announces it to Kyo, so casually like that? He knows they're together. He asked if he should call Kyo, after all. Why didn't Tohru say yes?

Kick.

"I will warn you…" What the hell does that even mean? Like he's a threat, or something. Physically, he looked like he was in good enough shape, but Kyo's confident he could still kick the shit out of him, if needed. And like Tohru would ever want to go back to him, anyway. But…

Punch.

His form slips. "Fuck," he curses under his breath, pulling his hand back. He gives it a shake, then brings it closer to his face to look at. His knuckles are red and swollen, and one seems to be…well, not quite where it's supposed to be.

Even with the throbbing pain in his hand, Kyo's mind still latches onto its unfinished thought. The way she'd been holding onto Itsuki as she cried…was that completely innocent? Did she like him touching her face? Was that why she didn't ask him to call? Tohru's never had an easy time letting go of people, even when they deserve to be kicked to the curb. Surely, she's at least wished a little for him to apologize and try to fix things. It's only natural, especially for someone as loving as her. But, would she want it to go any further than that? Kyo's not so sure, right now.

"Fuck!" he says again, louder this time, and throws a haphazard kick into the punching bag. Then he takes a deep breath and wanders down the hall toward the cabinet that holds the first aid kit. He's wrong. He has to be. She won't leave him. He hates this, though—that he can so badly lose his focus because of some other guy wanting Tohru, that he feels so insecure and pathetic that he truly believed for a minute that Tohru might want him, too.

"Kunimitsu," Kyo calls, kneeling and grabbing the kit.

"What?" Kunimitsu shouts back, sticking his head out of the kitchen doorway. Kyo holds up his hand. "Holy shit." Kunimitsu rushes over and crouches down next to Kyo, taking his hand to examine it. Kyo hisses in pain at the contact.

"Help me wrap it, will you?" Kyo asks, nudging the first aid kit toward Kunimitsu with his good hand.

"No, I think it's broken, man. You've gotta go to the hospital."

At the word hospital, Kazuma's paternal instincts kick in along with Tohru's girlfriend instincts—they look around the office door at the same time, the same shocked look on their faces.

"Kyo-kun? What happened?!" Tohru asks. Even though he wants to save face, there's no hiding it from her. Reluctantly, he holds his hand up into her view. Her eyes widen. "Oh my gosh."

"Kyo, how did that happen?" Kazuma asks.

"Bad punch," Kyo says simply.

Kyo hasn't thrown a truly bad punch in years, and never one that bad. Kazuma glances back and forth between him and Tohru. Kyo's sure they're quite the sight right now—him with his destroyed hand and bitter demeanor, her with her eyes still red and puffy from crying last night. Kyo turns away from his dad, embarrassed not only about his injury, but about how it must look like he and Tohru must be fighting about something or another.

Kazuma moves toward the door. "I'll get the car."

Tohru kneels next to Kyo and tilts her head, trying to get a better view of his hand. "Master has a car?"

"The dojo does," Kunimitsu says. "For moments exactly like this."

Tohru hums. "Kyo-kun…does it hurt badly?"

Kyo sighs and stands back up. "Yeah, hurts like a bitch," he admits. "But it'll be fine."

Kunimitsu and Tohru exchange a look. Kyo knows they're thinking the same thing—how will he teach or practice martial arts with a broken hand?

Kyo couldn't care less about that, right now. His job doesn't matter. The pain in his hand doesn't matter. What matters is the unsettling feeling in his chest, how emotionally exhausted Tohru looks, and how much he wishes he could just read her mind so he could put an end to this tension.

"Should I drive you once Master brings the car around?" she asks.

He raises an eyebrow. "Do you even know how to drive? 'Cause right now's not really a good time for a lesson."

"Kyo," Kunimitsu chastises. And Kyo can admit that it's a bit deserved—that was a lot snippier than he'd meant to be. But he doesn't say anything, just looks away. Kunimitsu turns to Tohru. "I'll drive you two, Tohru-kun."

"Thank you, Kunimitsu-san," she says. Out of the corner of his eye, Kyo can see her bow. Kunimitsu waves his hands awkwardly at the formality.

Kyo turns his head a bit, just enough to see Tohru properly again. Her mood hasn't seemed to change since his last comment, so that's good at least. He doesn't know how he'd live with himself if he made her feel even worse right now.

Master honks the car from the drive, and the group gather their shoes and head outside. Master agrees that he should stay behind to staff the dojo, and leaves the trip in Kunimitsu's hands. Everyone piles into the little car, Tohru and Kyo both in the back. They're quiet, and even usually-boisterous Kunimitsu seems to sense that he shouldn't talk. Kyo's glad.

"Call me when you're done," he says as Tohru and Kyo step out of the car at the hospital. "I'll just go hang out at that coffee shop across the street."

"Thank you again!" Tohru calls, shutting the car door behind Kyo.

Kyo checks in at the front desk, then joins Tohru where she waits in one of the stiff plastic chairs. Neither of them say anything for a moment. And it's in that silence that Kyo realizes, for the millionth time in his life, that he is a fucking jackass.

He reaches over with his good hand and squeezes Tohru's knee. She stiffens a bit at the contact, but she quickly relaxes into it, putting her hand on his.

"I'm sorry," he says softly.

"Me too," she whispers back.

And again, he has no idea what she's apologizing for. But he doesn't want to risk making her upset, so he just rubs his thumb in circles against her knee absentmindedly.

"Kyo-kun?" Tohru asks after a minute.

"Mm?" he asks, turning toward her. Her expression is hard. Between the frown settling on her lips and the red bags under her eyes, she looks like she's just been through hell and back. The fact that Kyo has any part in it makes his heart ache.

"How did this happen to your hand? Really."

"It was a bad punch, really," he insists, then pauses. He should just say it. The only way to soothe his anxiety is to talk to Tohru about it. He knows that, learned it a long time ago. But he's such a coward sometimes. He takes a deep breath in an attempt to steady his nerves. "I was thinking about last night and got distracted."

Tohru's frown deepens, and she turns her face away even though she continues the conversation. "I'm sorry. About last night. And that it got you hurt today, too."

"No, Tohru," he says. He moves his hand up to her cheek, guiding her face toward him. Tears are gathering in her eyes. "It's not your fault. I just love you. I don't like it when bad stuff happens to you. I wish I could always protect you. And—"

"Kyo Sohma?" a nurse calls.

Kyo curses under his breath, then shouts back, "Coming." Of course he'd get called back right when he's gathered his courage. He leans forward and kisses the tip of Tohru's nose. It actually gets her to smile a little bit, and that makes his heart soar temporarily. "I'll be right back," he says.

"I love you," she tells him, and while it would normally make him feel warm, right now it just makes him feel like even more of a horrible person again.

"I love you too."

"Sohma?" the nurse calls out again.

Kyo rushes over to her. In the doorway, she looks down at his hand and raises an eyebrow. "Broken hand?"

"Think so."

"Do you want her in the room with you?" she asks, gesturing in Tohru's general direction. Kyo glances over his shoulder.

Yes.

But Tohru is staring at the ground, wringing her hands together in her lap. He doesn't need to make her worry even more.

"No, it's okay. I'll go alone."