A/N: Hi! Sorry this took longer than I expected. I messed up my already-bad wrist and could barely type. Feeling okay now, though. I hope you enjoy.


Kyo freezes. He can't breathe, can't think other than fuck, what do I do?

He takes a deep breath. He has to do something.

He doesn't want to spook her, so it's probably best to avoid calling her name; she'd recognize that it's him immediately, and then what would she do? If he snuck up on her and just grabbed her to pull her back down, she'd probably freak out and possibly make herself go over regardless. It might be best to just start walking toward her, make his footsteps pronounced and hope she turns around to see who it is, then lets him talk. It doesn't sound fantastic, but he's not sure he has another option.

Even though he'd wondered earlier if she might try to hurt herself, he never expected to see her on the edge of a bridge.

He moves closer slowly, making sure to make his steps heavy and grind his sneakers on the concrete a bit. When he gets close enough to be noticed, Tohru turns and looks at him as he'd hoped, her eyes wide and full of tears.

"Kyo…what are you doing here?"

He doesn't answer her question, just says hesitantly, "Tohru, what are you doing?"

She just stares at him for a second, then ducks her head. "Sitting. Thinking."

"A-are you okay?" She picks her head back up at that, raising an eyebrow at him. He races to backtrack. "I mean, you just look like you're feeling even worse than before. Did something else happen?"

She hesitates for a second, then just says, "No." It sounds like she's probably lying, but he doesn't have time to try and read her that deeply right now—and he's overwhelmed, as it is. He loves this girl, thinks he would die without her, and now seeing her in this position…it's heartbreaking.

"Okay, well…do you want to come down and talk to me?"

"Not really."

Well…fair.

He grabs at the bottom of his jacket, clenches a fist around it to ground himself.

"Can I at least talk for a minute, then?" He takes her silence as permission and continues. "Listen, I—I wasn't thinking when I said all that stuff this morning. I love you. I love you so much that sometimes it scares me. I really don't know how to help you move on from the past, but…maybe I could just be by your side while you figure it out. I could support you. Either as your friend or your boyfriend. Whatever you want."

She still doesn't answer, instead just turns back around, obstructing his view of her face; she brings a hand up to her eyes, though, so he can tell that she's crying.

Like Rin pointed out earlier, he needs to say it, all of it. Before it's definitely too late this time.

"I just feel like it's all my fault. Everything," he continues. "If I hadn't handled that night the way I did, none of this would have happened, and—"

"We've talked about this. You had every right to reject me," she interjects. He tilts his head to the side, a little taken aback by her tone—livid, gravelly, but also somehow desperate. "I wasn't…entitled to a relationship with you, no matter how much I wanted it. I'm not now, either."

"But it's not like I let you down gently. And I loved you, so much. I should have been honest. At the very least, I should have fought to see you afterwards, instead of just giving in to Uotani and Hanajima, and what my family was saying. But I didn't; I let you walk away, and I'm afraid you never really forgave me for that…not even while we dated this time. And that's fair, it really is. But I'm scared that, because you never forgave me, you got into relationships with guys who didn't treat you right, and then you immediately jumped at the idea of dating me, even though I didn't treat you right, either. It was so quick, too, all of it. You let it all happen so quickly, right after sleeping with someone else. I just— I'm so afraid." He's crying now, and he's very much aware that his voice is trembling and breaking, but he can't stop it…and if he doesn't, if he lets himself sob, maybe she'll be able to tell how serious he is.

Tohru turns halfway towards him, pulling one leg up over the concrete, and his heart lurches, but she doesn't lose her balance. "Kyo…do you think you're a rebound?" she asks slowly, tone a bit incredulous.

His eyes widen.

"Well, that wasn't the point I was trying to make, but…sort of."

She sighs shakily. "Kyo, I didn't date you because I never got over Itsuki or Asahi. I got involved with them because I never got over you. I never stopped loving you. So, if anything…doesn't that make them rebounds?" At the last sentence, her voice turns small. He can tell it stings her to say that out loud. Kyo knows she doesn't like to hurt people, never wants to make them feel used, even if they never deserved her love and affection at all, to begin with.

He's quiet while he thinks that over, considers the timeline. Even though it's likely going to hurt her to agree, he can't help but see her point. "I…yeah, I guess so."

Tohru gives a single nod. She doesn't seem offended by that, like it was the answer she was expecting, almost.

"But, also," he continues, "did you? Ever really forgive me, I mean?"

"I guess not," she says after a bit. "But that's not your fault, it's mine. I'm just holding onto a grudge for no reason. I always kind of wished we'd get a second chance, though, and we did. And then that grudge ruined it." She sniffs, rubs at her eyes.

"My fear ruined it too. It wasn't all you. I've always, always hated myself. I've always thought I'm worthless. That didn't help us. That's really what made me feel like a rebound, and what made me think I can't help you with what happened in the past."

"No…" she chokes out. "I was acting like you were one. Looking at his Instagram. One night, I even told you how much I used to love him. That was awful of me. I'm awful. How could I expect you to know what to do with all that?"

"You're not awful," he says immediately, but what he really needs to say is what he adds next: "I'm so sorry."

"I am, too."

They stay there, just staring at the ground and letting their tears fall to mix with the rain beating down on the concrete. It feels everything like that night back in the rain, when they were standing a distance away from each other in Shigure's yard, pouring their hearts out to each other…but it also feels nothing like then, at all. There's at least been a bit of a resolution here, so far.

Then, Kyo asks, "How do I fix it? Can I even fix it?"

"I don't know. I don't know how I can fix it, either."

He loves her. He loves her so much, so he has to do something to show her that he's serious, that he wants to fix this. The first step would probably be…

"Do you love me?"

The answer is immediate. "Of course."

"Do—do you believe that I love you?" he asks.

Tohru hesitates, tries to clear her throat, but her voice still comes out sounding devastated. "I did until today. You just let go…so easily, like it was nothing. Even after all I did, it seemed so easy for you."

He had been a mess this morning. He had been crying harder than she was, by the time he left her apartment. But he also sees her point. He didn't try to fight for their relationship; he never really has. He never tries to fight for anything, at all.

"How can I prove it?"

She shakes her head, looking exhausted, like this is all just too much. He wants her to get down so he can walk her home and let her get some rest—the only thing scarier than Klutzy Tohru on the edge of a dropoff, is Tired Klutzy Tohru on the edge of a dropoff. "I don't know right now."

"Marry me," he blurts, then realizes that was the stupidest fucking thing he's ever said; and he's said a lot of stupid things in his life. His cheeks heat up immediately.

She stops crying almost immediately, like someone simply turned off the faucet controlling her tears, then shoots him a look that says he's going crazy. It's a look she's sent his way playfully in the past before, but this time it's serious—like she thinks he's finally really fucking lost it. "What?"

God, please don't make him repeat it.

Luckily (or unluckily, perhaps), she continues on. "I'm not going to marry you."

Again, very very fair. But also, ouch.

"Not…yet, at least," she adds. "Maybe someday."

It hurts that their conversations have so quickly gone from "of course we're going to get married and have kids" to "maybe someday." It's his fault. He knows that. He had been trying to be the mature one and messed it all up, made her think he doesn't love her enough to stand by her side while she works on her trauma.

"Kyo, I'm pregnant," she blurts.

What?

There's no way he heard that right.

"...Excuse me?"

Her eyes narrow into a glare, because she knows he heard her.

Kyo runs a hand over his face, trying to hide his flushed cheeks as he processes this new information.

They'd only used a condom that first time, and after that he'd just pulled out…which he'd heard wasn't incredibly reliable, but reliable enough. Apparently not.

Pushing all that aside, what's most important is that they're having a baby. That's the last truly coherent thought that enters his mind; everything else becomes fragmented and jumbled.

A baby. His baby. Theirs together.

Holy shit.

She's pregnant.

Wait…she's pregnant and they're having a baby and she's sitting on the edge of a bridge looking poised to kill herself.

Fuck fuck fuck.

Slowly, he takes a step forward. "Oh my god…we're having a baby."

Tohru seems a little surprised by that reaction, for some reason. "Yes?" she squeaks.

"When did you find out?" Another step forward; his knees rest against the concrete ledge now.

"This morning."

He blinks. Come to think of it…she'd been trying to tell him something this morning, hadn't she? But, of course, she gave up for the time being when he broke up with her. Which he absolutely cannot blame her for doing.

"Is that what you were trying to tell me this morning?"

She nods, trying to blink back more tears at the same time; they fall anyway.

"Shit. Tohru, I'm so sorry. That makes me an even bigger asshole than I already was."

She sniffles. "Well, it was sort of bad."

Even now, she's trying to be at least somewhat polite? He doesn't understand. He was clearly a dick this morning, in a lot of ways, and she's acknowledged tha—but making Tohru feel like she was unable to tell him news this big makes it a million times worse, and she doesn't seem to get how it's any worse, somehow.

He leans forward, then, and grabs her as quickly as possible. He lifts her from under her arms and pulls her into him, effectively getting her back onto the sidewalk. Her feet catch the concrete ledge on the way, and they both stumble back, falling into a pile on the walkway.

"Are you okay?" he asks, rubbing his forehead where they had bumped into each other.

"Mm-hmm," she replies, doing the same thing.

"Good…god, you scared me."

"Eh?" She blinks, then glances between him and the concrete lip. "Oh. Oh…I wasn't going to jump or anything."

Kyo feels his mouth drop open a bit. "What?"

"Well, I mean, I thought about it. B-but just for a second!"

"Then what the hell were you doing?"

"Sitting," she says simply, like it explains everything. In reality, it explains nothing at all. But he's not going to press that, at the moment.

"You're such a weirdo."

She smiles a little. Before he can think better of it, he reaches up and wipes the remaining tears from her cheeks. She blushes at the contact, and it hits him again that, even if they get back together at some point, they'll be starting completely from scratch in some ways. It stings. It makes sense, but it stings nonetheless.

Tohru stands up and offers him a hand. He takes it, and together they tug him back up onto his feet.

They look at each other, and then Kyo laughs. She raises an eyebrow, cheeks reddening again, though this time she looks a little more offended instead of embarrassed.

"What's so funny?" she asks softly.

"Nothing, nothing," he assures her. "Just…god, we're having a baby. A baby, Tohru. I'm so happy."

"You're…happy?" she repeats.

"Of course."

"But what if—what if things never work out between you and me?"

"Well, I—that would make me sad. Really sad. But no matter what, I'm here for this, Tohru. I'm not going to leave you alone to raise our kid."

Her eyes widen a bit, and then suddenly she's clinging to him and sobbing into his chest. He frowns as he wraps his arms around her, pulling her in tighter.

"Hey, hey," he coos, "What is it?"

"I—" Tohru chokes out. "After this morning, I was afraid you'd—you'd think it isn't yours."

"What?" That thought hadn't occurred to him, not even for just a second. Though he could definitely see why she was worried about it, after all he said. "No, Tohru…I'd never think that you cheated on me. You wouldn't do that."

She looks up at him and shakes her head, eyes and voice desperate. "Of course not!"

"I know," he assures her. He watches as she wipes at her cheeks. "Hey, we should get you out of the rain. The last thing you need right now is a cold." He pauses, hesitates. This is going to sound weird. "Wanna…go back to your place?"

She raises an eyebrow, even as she's still crying and sniffing. "Not like that," he says quickly. "I just—I'm kinda afraid to leave you alone right now. I'll sleep on the couch. Just… please let me stay."

She's quiet for a second, but she seems to get his point. "Okay," she says quietly.

He releases her from his grip and slides his hand down her arm to her own, then clutches onto it. He knows it's ridiculous, but part of him feels like, if he lets go, she'll disappear. They'll both disappear.

"And please, for the love of god, call Rin and Uotani. I'm sure they're about ready to kill me by now."

Tohru actually laughs a little at that. "Knowing them, that makes sense."

And then they start moving forward.

HIVUEHWVIJ

It feels weird and unnatural, all of it—the way Kyo sits down on the couch, leg bouncing up and down anxiously, while Tohru goes to get pajamas on; closing the door behind her while she changes; seeing his clothes when she opens her dresser drawer, knowing that they don't belong there anymore…at least not right now.

Once she's in comfier clothes, ones not soaked and dripping rainwater onto her carpet, she sits down on the bed and calls Isuzu.

"Tohru? Are you okay? Where are you?" she says, clearly panicked, by way of greeting.

Tohru rubs at her eyes, still blurry with leftover tears as she answers, "I'm home. I'm okay."

Isuzu is quiet for a second before sighing and asking, "Did Kyo…?"

"Yes, he—he came and got me."

"Was he an idiot?"

Tohru laughs a little. "No, he was very kind."

"Good. Are you okay at your place? You can come spend the night here, if you want."

"That's sweet of you, but I think I'll stay here. I sort of want to be in my own bed."

"I get it. Oh, and Tohru? I didn't say this before, but…congratulations. You're gonna be an amazing mom."

Tohru's eyes get misty yet again, but for an entirely different reason this time. Maybe she can start to get excited, now that she knows Kyo will be involved. "Thank you so much, Isuzu-san."

"Ugh, that wasn't meant to make you cry," she complains, but her tone is fond. "I'll talk to you later. Call me tomorrow?"

"Of course."

When she hangs up, she sends Uo-chan a text apologizing for earlier and letting her know that everything's okay, and finishes it off with a promise to call tomorrow. As much as she loves and adores her friend, she's too tired to deal with Hurricane Arisa right now.

So she takes a deep breath in an attempt to settle herself more, then heads out into the living room. Kyo's on the couch in the same position as before, leg still twitching, but now he's on the phone with someone. She moves into the kitchen to get water, trying to be quiet for him. She hears him call whoever is on the other side of the line a "fucking idiot" and then hang up. She can't help but laugh a little at that as she returns to the living room with two water bottles. She holds one out to him.

"Oh, thanks."

"Mm-hmm. Do you mind if I ask who you were talking to?" It's none of her business. They're nothing but friends and future co-parents right now. She knows that. But her curiosity still gets the better of her.

Kyo sips at his water, then nods. "Haru. He's spending the night at my apartment."

"Eh? Why?"

"Long story short, Rin kicked him out for the night."

Tohru's eyes widen. "What? H-how did that happen?!"

Kyo shakes his head a little. "Too much to talk about now. But they'll be fine in the morning."

"Okay…"

"So," Kyo starts, averting his gaze away from her face. His cheeks are red. She's not sure what could possibly be embarrassing him right now, after everything they've been through today. "How are you feeling?"

That's all?

"Mm…worn out. Still a little sad."
He nods in understanding. "What about, like, physically?"

She blinks. "Oh. I, uh—threw up this morning, and my stomach still feels weird now. But other than that, no pregnancy symptoms or anything."

Kyo nods again, humming in thought. "Did you call the doctor?"

"No…today was kind of crazy."

His cheeks redden again, and he quickly looks away. "Shit, yeah. Sorry."

She shakes her head and sits down next to him, making sure to keep a good amount of space between them as she does so. "It's okay. It's the weekend anyway. It'll have to wait until Monday."

"One more full day…" he mumbles absentmindedly. Then he turns back to her, the look on his face so earnest and adorable that it makes her want to kiss him. She bites her lip, hard, to get rid of that urge; it wouldn't be good for either of them right now. "What do you need until then?" he asks. She doesn't answer immediately, so he continues, "Snacks? Those vitamin things? I can go to the store. I'll go right now."

Tohru's breath catches, and she feels shame take over her body. She can barely think, other than to feel so guilty that she ever even considered he wouldn't be involved somehow. That's not Kyo. No matter how mad at her, or how sad he may be, he'd never leave her or their child alone.

"Don't cry…" he says softly. She hadn't realized she was. He reaches out and wipes her cheeks with his sleeve.

"It's late," she chokes out. "I'll be fine until tomorrow. We can go in the morning."

"Okay. If you're sure."

"Mm-hmm. We should try to get some sleep, then."

"Yeah. Uh—I'll just be right here if you need me. Wake me up anytime, okay? Anytime. I mean it, Tohru."

She nods, stands up, and tries to say goodnight, but she chokes on the word, nothing but a soft squeak coming out. She has something she wants to ask, and it's something she most definitely shouldn't ask.

She's pathetic. So pathetic.

"What's up?" Kyo asks, effectively taking her one chance to backtrack.

"Oh, uh…I was wondering…"

She clams up again, so he jumps in for her. "What do you need? Just tell me."

Tohru sighs, digs her nails into her palms. He's going to feel obligated to say yes.

"I was wondering, uh—if you would just come sleep with me."

Kyo tries to keep his face straight, but Tohru sees what's behind his efforts—surprise, uncertainty, sadness sadness sadness.

"Please, don't feel obligated!" she rushes to add. "You've done more than en—"

"Yes," he interjects quietly. "Of course."

"Oh," Tohru mumbles dumbly, not sure what to make of that answer even though she was the one who posed the question. Kyo stands and follows her into the bedroom. He lies on his usual side, closest to the door, and Tohru crawls in next to him. It's familiar and it's warm, but her heart is also utterly frozen, somehow.

Kyo rolls onto his side to face her. "Don't wanna sleep alone?" he asks softly. "I don't blame you."

That's part of it, sure. But she wouldn't have asked just anyone to come in here with her, and he knows that.

"I…didn't want to, either, to be honest," he continues.

Tohru doesn't answer. She doesn't know how, and maybe she doesn't really need to, either.

She just closes her eyes. Her head hurts from all the crying she's done today. Her stomach is still churning.

Her heart is still breaking.

But vague images are also appearing behind her eyelids, now, too: a small boy with orange hair, clinging to her, practicing little punches with Kyo, smiling up at them both with missing front teeth and Tohru's big brown eyes. It makes her think she might cry again.

"Tohru?"

She clears her throat. "Mm?" she asks, not opening her eyes.

"Can I…?" He sighs, gives up, and then just does it—he reaches out, finds the bottom of her pajama shirt, and slips his fingers upward. Tohru's eyes fly wide open at the contact, and she looks at him, completely and totally confused. But then his fingers come to a stop on her stomach, and he flattens his palm. The heat she felt from adrenaline fades, replaced by a comfortable, glowing warmth at the gentleness of his touch against where their still-tiny baby sits.

Hesitantly, Tohru lifts a hand of her own, moves aside her shirt, then presses her palm against the back of his hand. He's shaking a little bit; she frowns at that, then squeezes his hand.

She knows what he's feeling. She's feeling it, too.

But they're here, together, so at least they don't have to feel it alone.

Tohru can't really see his face in the dark, but his uneven breathing tells her he's crying. The crack in his voice when he speaks only confirms that suspicion. "Hey, uh—would you maybe consider going to therapy? I think I want to. We can go separately, or together, or whatever you want. I just…I think we both have a lot of work to do." He rubs his thumb in idle circles against her stomach. "For us. And for them."

Tohru can't take it anymore. She scoots closer to him, buries her face against his chest. He doesn't hesitate to wrap his arms around her in return. He pulls her close, and they cry together for a hundred different reasons neither of them can truly explain.

"When did you get so grown up?" Tohru chokes out through her tears, trying to lighten the mood a little bit.

Kyo sniffles, laughs a little. "Today. I don't really have a choice anymore."

She chuckles back, and he lowers his head, pressing their foreheads together.

"It's okay," he tells her. "I'm here. I love them, and I love you."

"We love you too," she whispers.

And that's that.


Chapter title from "ドライフラワー" (Dried Flowers) by Yuuri. Not a really Kyoru song at all, not even in the context of this story...but it's my favorite song and this line kills me every time.

Well, the full line, not the short crap I can post here: "Someday, somewhere, I wonder if we'll be able to laugh about all that we went through today."