Chapter Eight
"Hey, Merry Christmas," exclaimed Rory, sitting on the bed leaning against the headboard with a pillow clutched to her with her free hand. "I was going to call you earlier but wasn't sure because of the time difference, I didn't know what your plans were or what the baby mama etiquette is at Christmas ti-"
"Ace," interrupted Logan. "Merry Christmas."
"I'm glad you called, I have no idea what we're supposed to do in this situation, but it would feel wrong not speaking to you today," admitted Rory.
"I'm glad I called too," was his reply and Rory could practically the hear the smile in his voice she knew him so well. "Lorelai prompted it, she sent me some pictures."
"She did?" asked Rory, bemused. "Oh god, she took so many, did she send you all of them?"
Logan laughed. "I got two. One of you in Santa hat from the side with your hand cradling your bump and then one from the front with your bump wearing a Santa hat as well."
"I knew she would send that one," snorted Rory. "I'm sorry, I gave her your number in case something happened to me or the baby, so she'd be able to get a hold of you. I told her it was emergencies only."
"That's smart of you," said Logan. "And don't apologise, I love seeing you carrying our child. I knew rationally that you're pregnant and so you would get a bump, but it blew me away, Ace. You are radiant."
Rory blushed. "That's because I look so happy, I've finally stopped puking. It's barely a bump anyway, I bet I would look the same non-pregnant because it would just be Christmas dinner bloat."
"You frequently eat Christmas dinner amounts of food, Rory Gilmore, and I have never seen you bloated," assured Logan. "That is definitely all baby. Does all of Star's Hollow know now?"
"Yes, and it's awful," groaned Rory. "Which makes me feel mean because I love that town, but everyone knows. Taylor asked me to give him a list of all my appointments and dates so it could be discussed in the town meetings. I told him where to shove it and I believe my mum also shouted at him. Kirk asked if he could be godfather. Patty and Babette have a sweepstake on who the father is although they don't think I know about that one. Lane is the only one that keeps me sane. Also, everyone wants to touch me which I'm sure will only get worse as I get bigger and I'm not a fan of everyone wanting to rub my belly. I'm not a magic lamp!"
Logan chuckled. "Are you there for Christmas?"
"No, I'm in Nantucket at my Grandmother's with mum and Luke, and Jess turned up today."
"I suppose he's technically your cousin now Lorelai and Luke are married," mused Logan.
"You're not very subtle, Logan," teased Rory. "He's a friend."
"I know," said Logan. "I'm just jealous of anyone who gets to spend Christmas with you."
"How are you spending your day?"
"I'm in France."
"Oh," said Rory, dazed. "With Odette's family? I'm surprised her family is okay with you these days."
"Ace," sighed Logan, after a moment's pause.
Tears welled up in Rory's eyes as realisation hit her. "They don't know, do they? Does Odette know?"
She heard Logan take a sharp inhale of breath. "No."
"Does anyone know?" she asked fiercely, frustrated at the tears falling down her cheeks because she wasn't sad, she was angry.
"Not yet."
"When are you going to tell your fiancée that you're having a baby with another woman? Or your family? Will the baby have been born by the time you're honest with the people in your life?" asked Rory, scathingly. "Have you told Colin, Finn or Robert?"
"Not yet, it's hard, Rory," replied Logan, defensively.
"Do you know how hard it was for me to tell you? Or my mum? Or my grandmother? Or Paris? I still did it. Are you ashamed of this baby?"
"I'm ashamed of my actions and how I've treated people, but I would never be ashamed of our baby," proclaimed Logan. "And I'm sorry, I know it's been hard for you, I'll do better."
"I don't need you to do better, Logan, I need you to tell people."
"I will."
"I can't talk to you until you have," declared Rory. "You have never once made me feel like a dirty mistress until now. You say you're happy and you want to be a part of this baby's life but so far all you're doing is covering him/her up. I think we've probably both felt unwanted at times growing up by parents who weren't there or expected us to be things we're not and I'm not going to have our baby feel the same!"
"I would never want our child to feel like that, Rory," said Logan seriously. "I love that bean more than I thought was possible already and it's going to grow up knowing that."
"Then you need to prove that," stated Rory, before disconnecting the call.
The rest of the time at her grandmother's was less enjoyable. Luke and Jess departed on boxing day evening – Jess back to Philadelphia and Luke was called back to the Diner after Ceaser felt sick – so for the past few days it had just been the Gilmore Girls. Everyone knew something was bothering her, especially Jess and Lorelai but she hadn't wanted to talk about it. How could she admit that Logan hadn't told anyone? That although he denied it, he must be ashamed of her baby? She had sat on the couch watching Christmas films and eating leftovers whilst ignoring their pointed stares.
Now it was the day before her and her mother were going back to Stars Hollow and her grandmother was spending the afternoon volunteering at the Whaling Museum which Rory and Lorelai had both passed on (once you've seen one re-enactment of a whale murder you've seen them all, right?).
"It is just us now, Kid," announced Lorelai. "So, spill."
"What are you talking about?" asked Rory, feigning ignorance as she flicked through a magazine she was not reading.
"Did you kiss Jess?" blurted out Lorelai, her face screwed up.
Rory threw the magazine on the floor. "What makes you think that?"
"Because on Christmas I caught you holding hands and since then something is up with you, but you've been avoiding talking about it with me, but you were also avoiding looks from Jess too."
"I have not kissed Jess, and I'm not upset about anything related to him. It's Logan."
"Oh, thank god," exclaimed Lorelai, exhaling. "Crap, sorry, I meant what has he done?"
"Are you saying you're Team Logan, not Team Jess?"
"I'm saying I'm Team-Let's-Not-Complicate-My-Daughter's-Life-Anymore-Than-It-Already-Is," scoffed Lorelai.
"Fair," replied Rory. "Jess is not complicating anything in my life. He's just a friend. Also, technically my step-cousin now, as Logan reminded me."
Lorelai laughed. "I can see why he felt the need to remind you of that though in his position. Is that how he's upset you?"
"No, he's upset me because he's ashamed of me and our baby."
"He said that?" cried Lorelai. "I hope you're prepared to be a single mother because I am going to kill him."
"Well, he didn't actually say that," conceded Rory. "In fact, he defended that point and said he wasn't and that he loves the baby."
"Ror, honey, you're going to have to give me more clues because I'm not going to be able to finish this crossword puzzle without them," said Lorelai bemused. "So, he's ashamed of the baby but he said he's not ashamed of the baby?"
"He's not told a single person about my pregnancy. Nadda. Zero," sighed Rory.
"Oh," replied Lorelai, her shoulders deflating. "Did he give you his reasons why?"
"He said it was hard!" said Rory, petulantly. "Like it wasn't hard for me too!"
"Is he going to tell people soon?"
"Well, I told him I'm not going to talk to him until he does so let's hope so!"
"Rory, I know this has been hard for you and it wasn't what you planned but it wasn't what he planned either," said Lorelai calmly. "And I know you were probably scared about telling me and everyone else but deep down you knew we would all love and support you know matter what. Can you honestly say you're sure the people in Logan's life will do the same?"
"I can't believe you're on his side!"
"I'm not on his side at all but I understand what his family is like and how hard that can be," explained Lorelai. "I think Logan is in a position where he can't guarantee his parents are going to be supportive and they could be indifferent at best or disown him completely at worst. He knows he's going to upset Odette and impact her life so he's worried about that. Even his job is tied up in this! He'll potentially have to leave completely if he's disowned but at the very least, I imagine he wants to be this side of the pond so he's going to have to leave his life behind. I'm not saying it's right, Rory, and he needs to man up, but I understand."
"The longer he waits, the longer I feel alone, Mum," admitted Rory.
"I know," said Lorelai, giving her a soft smile. "The offer to kill him still stands if he doesn't hurry up, I promise, but maybe cut him a little slack. You're going to both mess up, you need to be able to forgive him."
"Mum, can't we get the present tomorrow?" whined Rory, from the passenger seat. "I just want to my pyjamas on and curl up with a book."
"Your grandmother delivered your Christmas present to the Diner to make sure you get it and you know she will ring constantly until I tell her you've got it and you love it," said Lorelai. "So, we are going to run in now before we get home."
"Can't we ask Luke to get it tomorrow?"
"No, because I will receive phone calls tonight and tomorrow and that's already too many, so get out of this car."
"Can I claim pregnancy as an excuse, and you get it by yourself whilst I wait in the car?" asked Rory weakly.
"No!" exclaimed Lorelai. "It is a present! You need to see it properly for the first time not me struggling to carry it with my arms wrapped around it."
"So it's big?"
"I'm guessing it is otherwise we'd have been able to take it home in the car," replied Lorelai, logically.
"Do you know what it is?" asked Rory, narrowing her eyes, getting out of the car and slamming the door shut. She shivered and rubbed her hands as her mum opened up Luke's.
"I'm not going to dignify that with an answer."
"So yes then," stated Rory. "I know you're married to the owner and you have your own keys but I still feel like we're breaking in."
"I know what you mean," grinned Lorelai. "We can have all the pastries we want."
"If we're actually only here so you can take some stale doughnuts, I'm going to murder you."
"Have some faith, geez. Luke said it's upstairs."
Instead of turning the lights on in the Diner and attracting any late-night hungry stragglers, Rory used her torch app on her phone to guide them to the door leading upstairs until Lorelai located the hallway light. Rory's jaw dropped when she walked into the inside of the apartment.
"Mum? What is going on?"
"Do you like it?" asked Lorelai, grinning as she leant against the door frame.
The walls were freshly painted white, the old yellow curtains replaced with new pale red ones. The furniture was different too but oddly familiar as she took the main room in.
"Is this couch from the poolhouse?"
"yeah, I managed to salvage it before your grandmother sold everything," smiled Lorelai. "The couch, the bed – I figured you'd want one your mother hadn't had sex on – and look over there."
"Grandpa's desk!" gasped Rory, rushing over to it and stroking the surface fondly. "What's going on?"
"It was Luke's idea," explained Lorelai. "He reminded me that this was just being used for storage and we could most of that stuff in the garage. He also wanted me to really make the point clear that he's not kicking you out and if you want to stay at home he would love you too. I just know you were already fretting about being in the over thirty's club and being back at home and now you'll be thinking about where to raise your child and that bedroom is small. This doesn't have to be permanent but we thought if you had your own space it might help. It's rent-free until you're a mega-famous author with royalties rolling in and then we can negotiate."
"I don't know what to say," said Rory, collapsing onto the red and white striped couch.
Lorelai joined her. "Your room at the house is staying the same, it will always be your room, Ror."
"Thanks, mum," cried Rory, pulling her in for a hug.
"You've not noticed your present from grandma," stated Lorelai.
Rory pulled back confused. "I thought this was it, the furniture, the desk?"
Lorelai pointed into the corner and Rory hadn't noticed a dark blue blanket draped over something large. Lorelai just smiled as Rory crumpled her eyebrows in confusion at her and shrugged her shoulders. Rory got up and pulled the blanket off revealing a beautiful, wooden crib. The main wooden bars in the corner were carved with little stars and crescent moons. Rory held her breath at the thought of what would be occupying this space for their sleep and dreams and automatically placed her hand against her stomach.
"Mum, it's beautiful."
"Do you want to stay here?"
"Yes," smiled Rory. "It's perfect."
"You say that now but although it's bigger than your bedroom by the time we get a changing table and everything else you need for a baby in here it is going to be cramped! Also, everyone will know what you're up to because you have to leave and enter through the Diner."
"I don't care," said Rory. "I mean it, it's perfect. I can write here, I can go downstairs, I have somewhere that's mine and Bean's. How did this happen?"
"I thought you would like it," grinned Lorelai. "it was the real reason Luke and Jess had to leave Nantucket early. They both cleared the place out, painted, brought the furniture over. They were both too embarrassed to move over your personal items like clothes though so they're still at home. However, all the stuff in your bags is clean so if you want to stay here tonight you've got everything."
"Thank you, thank you, thank you!"
A/N: Hope you enjoyed it and please let me know your thoughts :) I feel like I've teased you with a little bit of Logan but I promise you will be getting more of him soon!
