Lupine
Disclaimer: I do not own Haikyuu!.
Warnings: Hurt/Comfort, Drama
Pairings: Hinata x Bokuto, Bokuto x Akaashi, Akaashi x Kuroo, Hinata x Kozume, Hinata x Miya Atsumu, Hinata x Miya Osamu, Hinata x Miya Atsumu x Miya Osamu, Haiba x Yaku, Kozume x Kuroo, Kuroo x Tsukishima, Kuroo x Bokuto, Kuroo x Akaashi x Bokuto, Sugawara x Sawamura, Iwaizumi x Oikawa, Sugawara x Sawamura x Iwaizumi x Oikawa, Oikawa x Hinata
Plot: Haiba visits Yamaguchi and Tsukishima. Hinata invites Akaashi to the hanging gardens.
Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics
Ch 11: Affection
Yaku perked his ears up as the front door opened, Kozume stepping inside and closing the door quietly behind him, kicking off his shoes beside the door and starting towards the kitchen with a tired sigh. Yaku watched his approach with a soft smile, meeting Kozume's eyes as the other beta padded closer and opened one of the cabinets over the sink to retrieve a mug, pouring himself a fresh cup of coffee before turning to rest back against the countertop at Yaku's side, content with standing beside his roommate and sipping his coffee in relative silence.
Yaku sipped at his coffee as well for a few long moments, his eyes tracing down Kozume's frame, the kitchen lights glinting off of the rose-gold band wrapped around his ring finger, the vulpine smiling quietly and humming thoughtfully before he spoke. "You spent the night with Hinata and Bokuto?"
Kozume hummed his reply, sipping at his cup quietly before perking his ears towards the living room, then the bedroom beyond. "Lev isn't here?"
Yaku flicked one of his ears to the side, tracing the lip of his mug absently. "He decided to spend some time with Yamaguchi and Tsukishima. It seems they reached out to him after having dinner with you the other night. Lev was excited, they hadn't invited him over in quite some time."
"They definitely seemed like they would be the types to keep mostly to themselves." Kozume replied thoughtfully, his tone soft and light. "It's been a while since it's been just the two of us at home, without Lev or Shouyou here to disrupt the quiet." He smiled to himself, chuckling fondly, Yaku nodding and letting out a sigh while setting his cup aside, turning to fully face Kozume, his eyes drifting once more to the beta's ring.
Kozume noticed his gaze, his expression softening as he set his coffee aside, offering his hand to Yaku and watching as the vulpine examined his ring carefully. He tilted his head slightly to the side, wrapping his fingers around Yaku's and taking a step closer, nosing at his forehead gently. They lingered like that for a little while longer before Yaku glanced up and met Kozume's eyes, holding his gaze and whispering gently, "I'm happy for you, Kenma. I know how much Shouyou means to you."
Kozume hummed softly, reaching up and cupping Yaku's cheek, petting over the rise of his cheekbone before pressing their foreheads together gently, the tawny beta replying quietly, "It's everything I've ever wanted and more. They accepted me into their bond as if it was always meant to be. All my insecurities and doubts, all the self-loathing, it melted away the moment I realized Shouyou had always wanted to bond with me, too." He looked down at his ring, tracing his thumb along the soft rose-gold while chuckling softly. "Do you remember that trip we took? To the beach? We stayed at that little cabin on the shore for a week, completely cut off from the rest of the world. It was our own little paradise."
Yaku nodded slowly, his eyes on Kozume's ring as well. "I remember. You were so nervous then, wondering if you were making a mistake. Wondering if the feelings you were experiencing were real, or if you were acting impulsively, simply caught up in the moment." He traced his fingertips along Kozume's palm, squeezing his hand lightly. "When you came home with rings, and showed me the bands you'd decided on, I was certain then you would finally tell him how you felt." He gave Kozume an affectionate smile. "When you decided to set aside your feelings, and continue your friendship with Shouyou, I felt your tension, your heartache. I wanted you to tell him, I wanted you to confess so I could be there beside you to see if Shouyou would reciprocate your feelings. I was certain he would." He laced their fingers gently, adding softly, "I wanted that for you, so desperately. I wanted you to be happy together. You both deserve so much happiness."
Kozume had started purring quietly, listening to Yaku's quiet words and blushing faintly, nuzzling the vulpine gently and drawing him closer, wrapping his arms around his shoulders while Yaku held his waist. "He went out and bought rings just after, practically the same weekend I did. When we showed one another the receipts we realized they were only a few days apart."
Yaku smiled and nuzzled Kozume's cheek, gliding his hand up Kozume's side and shifting to take one of his hands, taking a few steps across the kitchen tile and starting a slow rhythm between them, Kozume smiling and laughing brightly while falling into a slow dance, allowing the vulpine to spin him delicately before pulling him close once again.
"I can't wait." Yaku said gently, tracing along the curve of Kozume's spine while turning them again, Kozume holding his hand tightly and blushing while holding his eyes. "I can't wait to dance with you at your bonding ceremony. I can't wait to see the look on your face."
Kozume blushed brighter at that, laughing merrily and allowing Yaku to spin him in a wide arch, the vulpine pulling him closer again and perking his ears up with a happy grin, the tawny beta wiping at his eyes and wrapping his arms around Yaku's neck.
"I love you, Morisuke." Kozume whispered, holding onto his small frame tightly. "Thank you for being there, for always supporting me. For listening to me while I cried, and allowing me to confide in you when I couldn't bring myself to confide in Shouyou. You've been there for me through so much, and I couldn't imagine what my life would be like if you weren't a part of it."
Yaku purred softly, nuzzling Kozume and kissing across his face, kissing away the happy tears that fell down his flushed cheeks while whispering gently against Kozume's smile, "Promise you'll save me a dance at your ceremony, and someday at my ceremony I promise I'll save a dance for you, too."
-x-x-x-
Kuroo perked his ears up at hearing a knock at the door, tapping Yamaguchi's shoulder and gesturing towards the front door lightly, the freckled beta getting up from his spot on the couch and padding over to answer it quickly. He opened the door and smiled up at the tall vulpine peering down at him, Haiba smiling and dipping back his ears a bit before stepping inside, reaching down to unlace his shoes before setting them neatly beside the door.
Tsukishima glanced up from the stovetop as Haiba approached, the two betas exchanging a friendly smile before the blonde asked, "You're just in time for food. I'm making chicken stir-fry. Could you help Tadashi set the table? He can't quite reach the plates."
Yamaguchi had been watching Tsukishima as his roommate spoke, pouting quickly and signing, [If you know I can't reach them you might consider moving them to a lower shelf!] He rolled his eyes and waved Haiba closer, pointing to the cabinet in question and standing back to allow the tall beta to grab the requested plates.
Kuroo watched them with an amused smile before perking his ears up and adding with an impish chuckle, "Tsukki, you could have asked me to grab the plates for Yama you know. I'm just as tall as you are."
Haiba flinched at suddenly hearing the Alpha's voice, recoiling instinctively and sending one of the plates toppling to the kitchen floor, the plate shattering into dozens of shards with a loud clatter, both Tsukishima and Yamaguchi reaching up to shield their ears from the shrill sound. Kuroo stood from the couch instantly, padding closer and taking the remaining plates from Haiba, the vulpine beta watching him cautiously, his ears ducked back, Kuroo holding his gaze for a long moment before letting out a soft sigh, glancing down at Yamaguchi apologetically.
"Shit, I'm sorry guys. I didn't mean to startle anyone." He set the plates aside, then tapped Tsukishima's shoulder and signed quickly, [Where's the broom?]
Tsukishima winced and gestured towards the hallway closet with one hand before pressing his hands over his ears again, waiting for the painful ringing to subside, Haiba standing between the two smaller betas unmoving, his ears completely flat. It took a few minutes for Kuroo to sweep up the shattered plate, passing over the floor several times to make sure no shards remained, careful of the barefoot betas standing immobile in the kitchen. Once the glass was disposed of and the broom set aside, Kuroo reached out and rubbed Yamaguchi's upper arm gently, the freckled beta blinking back tears and wincing lightly, gingerly allowing his hands to fall from his head.
Kuroo didn't try to speak, lifting his hands to gingerly sign, [I'm sorry, Yamaguchi. I didn't mean to startle your friend.] He glanced up at Haiba briefly before returning his eyes to the smaller beta, signing tentatively, [Do you want me to go?]
"No." Yamaguchi replied softly, shaking his head and looking up to Haiba, reaching out and touching his hand, squeezing his wrist and saying thickly, "It's alright. It's just a plate. Everything's fine. We've all broken dishes before."
Tsukishima watched their exchange quietly, glancing between Haiba and Kuroo curiously before asking, "You two know each other, right? Kuroo's dating your roommate?"
Haiba perked his ears up a bit at that, dipping one of his ears to the side slightly before meeting Kuroo's eyes gingerly. "Uh, yeah. Yeah we've met before. I just wasn't expecting…" He frowned a little, arching his brow a bit. "You three know one another?"
Tsukishima cracked a smile at that, snorting softly and nodding, quirking a brow and catching Yamaguchi's eyes. The freckled beta sighed and nodded as well, tugging Haiba's wrist gently and stepping towards the kitchen table, sitting down beside him and beckoning Kuroo closer, the three settling down to speak with one another, Tsukishima continuing to add fresh ingredients and seasoning to his stir-fry.
Yamaguchi patted Haiba's forearm lightly, soothing the taller beta with a soft croon before directing his attention to Kuroo, signing fluidly as he explained in further detail, [Kuroo has been our friend since we were in middle school. He was one of the only hearing kids in our sign class, and we studied together for years before graduating high school. We remained friends, even after being accepted into different colleges. He knows sign almost as well as we do.] He looked to Kuroo, grinning and adding with a cheeky smile, [It helps having us as friends, keeps his sign fresh.]
Kuroo laughed at that, nodding, signing as well as he spoke, "It definitely helps having others to converse with in sign language. The smallest changes in modern sign can really enhance the quality of conversation. I'm lucky they're so patient with me. Sign is definitely something I'll be continuously learning for the rest of my life. I'm lucky Yama and Tsukki are such amazing friends."
Haiba watched their conversation in awe, smiling and nodding as he listened to Kuroo's words, the tension in his shoulders slowly unwinding. "I had no idea you even knew them. I think I remember you mentioning them briefly, but then again…" He hummed thoughtfully, trying to recall. "I think the only times we've ever seen one another were when you came to see Kozume, and I was distracted with gaming, and teasing Mori." He laughed lightly, rubbing at his nape apologetically. "It's hard for me to concentrate on conversations like that."
Kuroo nodded, ducking his ears back a bit and offering gently, "I'm sorry if you weren't expecting for me to be here. I didn't mean to startle you earlier. It's my fault the plate broke."
"No! No, I'm sorry I reacted that way." He let out a sigh, carding his fingers through his pale hair, giving the Alpha an apologetic look. "I don't handle conflict very well, and I guess there's still a part of me that remembers that night with Bokuto."
Yamaguchi perked his ears up at that, glancing over his shoulder to look at Tsukishima, the blonde watching Haiba's lips carefully. "What do you mean? What happened with Bokuto?"
"Hoh boy." Kuroo sighed, reclining back in his chair a bit, glancing between the two betas watching him before returning his attention to Haiba, the pale beta giving him an apologetic smile, glancing towards Tsukishima as well. The Alpha thought to himself for a few moments, thinking of how he wanted to reply, then he admitted softly, "I'm not sure how much you gathered from dinner the other night, but Bokuto and I had a...misunderstanding, about something that happened years ago. With Akaashi."
Tsukishima nodded briefly, tossing the skillet and stirring the sizzling peppers and meat, careful not to burn the dish as he refocused on Kuroo once again. "Yeah, it sort of seemed like something was up with that."
"Right." Kuroo sighed, perking his ears towards Yamaguchi, still signing as he spoke. "Bokuto, Akaashi, and I were together in high school. I'm sure you remember me talking about having a falling out with my best friend? That was Bokuto. We haven't spoken to one another in years, until recently we met again through Kozume."
Yamaguchi inhaled softly, nodding his understanding, glancing towards Haiba briefly before signing, [So, what happened when you saw Bokuto again?]
Kuroo's expression softened a bit, and he replied hesitantly but honestly, glancing between Yamaguchi and Tsukishima as he continued. "I knew Kozume was inviting over his best friend, Hinata, and Hinata's partner. What I didn't realize was Hinata was dating Bokuto." He rubbed at his arm absently, his ears twitching towards the sound of the skillet on the stove. "When I realized it was Bokuto, I reacted instinctively. I lashed out at him, I told him to get out. It wasn't…" He closed his eyes briefly, inhaling softly. "It wasn't my place to tell him to do so. I overstepped, and Kozume asked me to leave. I didn't get a chance to explain anything until the next day, and luckily Kozume forgave me for how I reacted, and explained to me what had truly happened between Akaashi and Bokuto."
He paused for a moment, then summarized the events that had happened next.
"After hearing everything, I decided to speak with Bokuto, and after we talked things out we decided to forgive one another." He smiled to himself at the thought of the other Alpha, his expression affectionate as he spoke. "It hasn't been very long now, but we're trying to rekindle our friendship." He arched his brow a little, an embarrassed blush tinging his cheeks as he admitted quietly, "The whole thing started because I was hot-headed and defensive, and pushed Bokuto away from Akaashi. It was a mistake, one that I feel like I'm still learning from. I feel guilty about what happened, but also I feel that the mistakes we make are mistakes we can learn and grow from if we take the time to do so. I don't want to ever make a mistake like that again." He bit his lip lightly before adding, "I also like to think that I'm not the same person that I was back in high school, and if the same situation happened now I would be able to handle it more maturely. We've both changed so much since high school. There are times when it feels like Koutarou is a completely different person." He sighed softly, smiling to himself. "I'm eager to get to know the man he has become."
"It sounds like you still love him." Yamaguchi said with a smile, Kuroo blushing lightly and laughing heartily, ducking his ears back a bit.
"Yeah, yeah I guess I do. There's a part of me that has always loved him, even when I hated him the most." He glanced towards the ceiling thoughtfully, his eyes trailing across the sunlight dappling the off-white stipple. "He has always been my best friend, since childhood. My closest confidant, my other half. A love like that, it's irreplaceable." He shrugged lightly, sighing while returning his eyes to Yamaguchi. "Even if things never become the way they were before, Bokuto Koutarou will always have a place in my heart."
Tsukishima hummed softly as he flicked the dial on the stovetop to extinguish the heat, gathering up the skillet and a wooden trivet before bringing their meal to the table, setting it in the center to start to cool. He lingered for a moment before stepping away to check on the rice maker, fluffing the steaming rice inside and scooping it into four separate bowls, bringing each bowl of rice to a place setting, ensuring everyone had a glass before sighing and sitting down himself to eat.
Kuroo reached forward and grabbed the pitcher of tea sitting before them, pouring each of them a glass and setting it aside at the end of the table, giving Tsukishima a bright smile. The blonde beta was watching him quietly, and after a moment the Alpha lifted his hands to sign, [Tsukki? Is everything okay?]
The beta nodded, tilting one of his ears towards Haiba before asking aloud, "Everything's alright now? Between Kuroo and your household?"
Haiba blinked at that, laughing a bit while nodding. "Err...yeah! Yeah, everything's okay. Kuroo stayed over recently, to spend time with Kozume. They get along together really great, and Yaku and I have no issue with Kuroo staying over. It's just, well…" He glanced away briefly, trying to find the right words. "I'd never seen two Alphas oppose one another like that. As a mixed breed, seeing a lupine Alpha acting defensively, or threatening another lupine…" He perked his ears up a bit, his breath shaky as he admitted quietly, "It was thrilling, and also a little terrifying." He bit his bottom lip, ducking back his ears a bit. "I could only imagine what that fight would have been like if Bokuto had risen to accept your challenge."
Kuroo laughed a bit at that, nodding and shrugging lightly, sighing as well. "You know, I was honestly expecting him to. It's one of the reasons I asserted myself so quickly. The Bokuto I knew in high school wouldn't have backed down without a fight, and I wasn't planning on letting him get anywhere close to Kenma." He picked up his chopsticks, tapping them against the side of his rice bowl thoughtfully. "I've never felt more defensive and territorial in any other situation that I can recall, aside from the night I thought Bokuto had purposefully hurt Akaashi."
Tsukishima was quiet again for a few moments longer before directing his attention to Haiba, asking in a hesitant tone, "What was it like? Seeing Kuroo threatening Bokuto?"
Haiba tilted his head curiously, accepting the stir-fry as it was passed to him, thinking for a moment before replying, "For me, it was like a rush of heat all at once. It set my nerves on edge, and everything seemed to slow down all of a sudden. When I talked with Mori about it after, he said it was an adrenaline rush response to an imminent threat. He said it was one of the reasons he kept Hinata from going to Bokuto during the altercation. He didn't want an omega getting close to two Alphas if they were about to fight."
Yamaguchi hummed his understanding, nodding and taking a bite of chicken before replying to what Haiba had said. "It's true. It's one of the first things we learn about in feline society. Keep omegas away from Alphas if there's going to be a fight. The pheromones Alphas release during a brawl can be overwhelming for us as betas, let alone omegas who are far more sensitive." He met Tsukishima's eyes, nodding lightly before taking another bite. "It's interesting to think about Kuroo fighting someone, but honestly you should consider yourself lucky you weren't there. Haiba's reaction to hearing Kuroo's voice unexpectedly behind him just shows how the effects of witnessing such an altercation can linger long after the fact, even when the threat wasn't directed at you. Bystanders can experience a myriad of symptoms related to submissive drops. Especially betas who tend to take the more submissive role in their relationships."
Haiba blushed lightly, nodding. "Between Morisuke and myself, I would definitely consider Mori as the more dominant one in our relationship. If he hadn't been there, and I had witnessed such a thing, I have no idea how I would have reacted. He kept me grounded through the entire event."
Kuroo sighed softly, reaching over and patting Haiba's arm gently, the pale beta catching his eyes. "I'm sorry, for putting you all through such a thing. I hope you can forgive me. I want to be friends with you and Yaku, and spend more time with both of you. I know how much you both mean to Kenma. I want to be a part of your lives."
Haiba blushed lightly, nodding and perking his ears towards Kuroo. "No, it's alright! Really. I had no idea I was going to react that way. I guess I should have clarified who else was coming over when I accepted the invitation." He looked to Yamaguchi and Tsukishima, adding quickly, "Thank you, by the way! It was really nice of you to invite me over! I don't really spend much time with anyone, aside from Mori and Kenma. Getting out of the apartment was nice." He blushed a bit brighter, adding shyly, "I've been looking forward to playing games with you since I received your text!"
Yamaguchi nodded brightly, giving Haiba a smile and toasting his glass against the air. "Gamers unite! We're glad to have you!"
Tsukishima nodded as well, tilting his ears towards the other beta. "I'm sorry we didn't think to invite you over sooner. Tadashi and I have become rather reclusive ourselves." He met Kuroo's eyes, adding with a faint smile. "It seems we will be seeing more of each other now that our friend circles have become further intertwined. We may finally have enough people to establish a steady game-night."
Haiba beamed at that, leaning closer to the blonde excitedly, "You mean with board-games and card-games? Oh, Morisuke would love that!" He grinned happily, adding eagerly, "If Kuroo invites over Kenma too, then we'll definitely have enough players for Red Dragon Inn and Catan!"
Kuroo crooned his approval, grinning and taking a bite of his stir-fry, humming at the flavor. "Game night sounds like an excellent idea." He glanced toward Yamaguchi, then to Tsukishima, asking after a moment, "Would you be alright with extending the invitation to include Bokuto and Hinata too? I'm sure they would both really like that."
The roommates exchanged a glance, then Yamaguchi shrugged lightly, offering Kuroo a smile. "I have no objections, though Tsukki was saying he's concerned Hinata might be a bit much. He's very energetic." He looked to Tsukishima, patting his arm lightly. "I'm sure if we're all around to distract him and divide his attention, he won't be too overwhelming for us. He seemed bubbly and sweet when we met before. I'd like to get to know him better."
Tsukishima hummed softly, taking a bite of pepper and chewing slowly, tilting his ears towards Haiba and nodding as well. "I suppose if Haiba is with us, those two can entertain one another. I think Haiba has the highest energy out of all of us, aside from Hinata."
"Akaashi and Yaku are the quiet ones." Kuroo mused, tapping his chopsticks together as he grabbed another piece of meat. "If we invite them too, they might mellow things out for all of us."
Yamaguchi smiled and thought to himself for a few moments before speaking aloud, "You and Kozume, me and Tsukki, Haiba and Yaku, Hinata and Bokuto, and maybe Akaashi too." He grinned and nodded, tilting his ears towards Tsukishima as he cheered happily, "With nine of us, there would be enough players for just about anything! We could take turns on different teams, and have the odd person out play the role of gamekeeper as needed!"
Tsukishima watched his roommate with a soft smile, letting out a little sigh and nodding, "That does sound like it would be a lot of fun, doesn't it?"
Yamaguchi cheered again, taking another bite of his rice happily and returning his attention to his meal, Kuroo chuckling softly and meeting Tsukishima's eyes, the blonde holding his gaze steadily for a few moments before glancing away as well. Kuroo's expression softened, and they resumed the rest of their meal in relative silence, Haiba asking questions about their current gameplay now and then to see how much progress Tsukishima and Yamaguchi had made on the newest game releases they'd both purchased. Once they were finished eating, Kuroo helped Yamaguchi clear the table, and Tsukishima and Haiba took their places on the couch side by side. Tsukishima occupied the other beta by showing off his collection of unique items obtained during his current playthrough, Haiba eagerly fawning over his rarer, more elusive finds, the apartment filled with the sounds of happy chatter and laughter, Kuroo watching over them with a soft smile while helping Yamaguchi with the dishes.
The freckled beta watched the Alpha quietly, perking his ears up a bit and grinning while nudging Kuroo's shoulder to get his attention, handing him a plate to dry before signing teasingly, [What is it? You look like a lovesick puppy, staring at Tsukki like that.]
Kuroo blushed and chuckled heartily, drying the plate dutifully before setting it aside, signing back with a friendly smile, [I was just thinking of the way Tsukishima reacted to hearing about my altercation with Bokuto. I was worried hearing details about me acting aggressive and dominant like that might put him off, but if anything he seemed...curious?]
Yamaguchi hummed and grinned, nodding and glancing towards the couch before signing quickly, [I won't give away too much, but I'll let you in on a little secret.] He beckoned Kuroo closer, the Alpha leaning down a bit and watching the beta closely. [I may or may not have found some interesting websites in Tsukki's search history related to just those sorts of things.] He quirked a brow, clicking his tongue against his teeth lightly before nudging Kuroo again, the Alpha blushing brightly while Yamaguchi crowed out a series of hearty laughter, slapping Kuroo playfully with a dish towel before returning to washing the dishes, the Alpha letting out a laugh of his own while looking towards Tsukishima once more.
That was...interesting. It was good to know the thought of Kuroo being dominant and threatening didn't scare Tsukishima, at least. Thinking about what Tsukishima had mentioned before, about potentially being interested in acting as the dominant role in a relationship, it had Kuroo's heart skipping a beat at the possibility. He was more than willing to engage with Tsukishima as a dominant Alpha, or give up control and let Tsukishima discover more about himself by exchanging their power dynamics. He was willing to switch into whichever role the beta felt most comfortable with. He bit his lip, exhaling shakily and accepting the next plate from Yamaguchi, drying it absently while watching Tsukishima and Haiba, trying not to let himself get too carried away with the information Yamaguchi had provided him with.
The thought of Tsukishima browsing through websites late at night, watching video clips of Alphas acting territorial or defensive, perhaps even challenging one another and brawling, it had a telltale blush warming his cheeks. He wondered if Tsukishima would ever admit such interests to Kuroo, if he would ever experience the beta opening up to him so intimately that he might confide in Kuroo his most private fantasies.
Kuroo would absolutely give Tsukishima a taste of just how dominant he could be, if that was something the beta craved to experience. He smiled to himself, letting out a deep sigh. For now, he would wait patiently, and allow Tsukishima to decide what he truly wanted from Kuroo.
If Tsukishima decided that he wanted to pursue something sexual with Kuroo, well then. The Alpha could hardly wait to satiate his appetite.
-x-x-x-
Sugawara sat by himself quietly on the balcony overlooking the surrounding neighborhood, sighing to himself softly. Oikawa had wanted to be by himself today, and while Sugawara understood his partner focused best when he was alone, it ached being apart from him, knowing they only had a few months left to spend together.
"I want to paint while I still have the strength to do so, and enjoy myself." Oikawa had whispered to him gently, searching his eyes. "I promise I'll spend time with you tonight. We can all go out and have dinner together, wherever you'd like. I'll be back before dark."
It made him feel desperate, and selfish, wanting to have Oikawa all to himself. He knew how much Oikawa loved spending time at his studio, how much he adored making new outfits and painting new masterpieces, but the thought of Oikawa alone in the private room of his studio just didn't sit right with Sugawara. It never had. He wanted to be there at his side, watching him as he worked. He wanted to share those experiences with Oikawa, to see that part of himself he kept hidden away from all of them.
Thinking back on it, he wasn't sure anyone had ever stepped foot in the back office of the studio before, at least not while Oikawa was in the middle of a project. Hinata had been the first.
He flinched slightly when he felt a hand on his shoulder, startled for a moment before realizing Sawamura was hovering over him, the Alpha dipping back his ears apologetically and taking a seat beside him, lacing their fingers gently. "I'm sorry for startling you, Koushi. I tried calling out to you before coming up, but you didn't respond."
Sugawara let out a shaky sigh, arching his brow a bit. "No, I'm sorry. My mental health isn't doing very well today. I didn't mean to ignore you, sweetheart. I'm sorry."
Sawamura watched him quietly, petting over his knuckles and leaning closer to nuzzle against his cheek, a deep purr rumbling in his chest. "You don't have to apologize, Koushi."
The omega hummed quietly, blinking slowly and sniffing lightly, resting his cheek against his hand as he looked around the neighborhood once more, his voice trembling as he whispered, "It's beautiful today. The sun is shining so brightly. I hope the lighting is nice in the studio for Toru. I worry about him, being cooped up inside on days like this."
Sawamura watched his bonded carefully, crooning softly to soothe his distress, tracing over his fingers and nosing at his ear, Sugawara sniffing subtly and dabbing at his eyes, his ears flattening against his skull.
"How are we going to do this?" Sugawara whispered shakily, tears streaking steadily down his cheeks. "How are we going to let him go? I can't...I can't breathe, imagining a life without him. It hurts so much."
"I know." Sawamura whispered gently, sighing quietly against Sugawara's ear. "I know, Koushi. I know."
Sugawara turned and pressed his face against his Alpha's neck, curling up against him and crying softly, Sawamura petting over his back gently, holding him as he cried. He perked his ears towards the house next door, thinking of Iwaizumi, wondering what it must be like for him on days like this, when Oikawa wanted to be alone.
"Should we go over and spend time with Hajime?" Sawamura asked gently, Sugawara sniffing and nodding and he pulled back a bit, wiping at his eyes and blinking up at his Alpha slowly. Sawamura cupped his cheek, leaning down to nuzzle his jaw affectionately, kissing his wet cheek softly and purring steadily, listening to Sugawara's breathing slowly even out into something light and calm, the omega wiping his face once more before offering him a small smile.
"I love you." He whispered, and Sawamura kissed his temple tenderly.
"I love you too." He crooned soothingly, keeping Sugawara close for a moment longer before standing, offering the omega his hand, walking with him back inside, grabbing a few things to take with them before heading over to Iwaizumi and Oikawa's house.
Downstairs, Akaashi was on the phone with Hinata, speaking back and forth with him quietly before perking his ears towards the sounds of footsteps on the stairs, watching as his roommates descended. They made their way across the living room and headed towards the foyer, Sugawara offering Akaashi a soft smile and a little wave, the other omega watching them go from his nest of pillows on the couch.
The dark-headed omega hummed softly at something Hinata had said, nodding to himself lightly before replying, "Alright. That sounds lovely. I'll meet you downtown in an hour? Bokuto is welcome to join us, too." He smiled fondly as he listened to the other omega's voice, saying a short farewell before pushing himself up from the couch, stretching his arms far above his head, listening to the sound of the front door clicking shut. He glanced down at his phone, checking his texts and noting a new message from Sugawara, opening it and texting a reply while walking through the townhouse towards his room, stripping off his clothes and heading for the shower, turning on some music to listen to while he readied himself to meet up with Hinata and Bokuto.
It sent a little thrill through him, thinking about spending time with the Alpha he had once been in love with, thinking about what it would be like to see Hinata and Bokuto together, the way their personalities complimented one another. It seemed fitting, imagining the two of them together. He wanted to experience it for himself, he wanted to witness the love that they shared with one another. It filled him with warmth and contentment, and also a hint of longing. Things had changed so much since they'd first met. He never imagined that one day they would be like this, more strangers than friends, when once they had been hopelessly in love.
He showered and changed into something fitting for their rendezvous, then hailed a cab and directed the driver to the address Hinata had sent him, his eyes widening as the taxi pulled up to the corner of the street. Akaashi lingered for a moment, checking the address and offering the driver a tip before getting out and glancing around, reaching up to shield his eyes from the sunshine. It seemed Hinata was full of knowledge regarding a plethora of beautiful locales, Akaashi stepping gingerly towards the lush hanging garden, his eyes wide with wonder as he walked beneath the elaborate floral archway, perking his ears towards the sound of Hinata's voice as the petite omega called out to him from up ahead.
"Akaashi! I'm so glad you wanted to meet up with us!" He reached out and took Akaashi's hand, squeezing his fingers lightly, Hinata bouncing on the balls of his feet for a moment before turning and waving to the Alphas standing nearby, Akaashi blinking in surprised as he realized Bokuto was speaking with a set of twins. "At first it was just Atsumu and Osamu who were coming along with us, but when you said it was alright to invite Bokuto too I knew the afternoon would be perfect with all of us together!"
"These are your roommates?" Akaashi clarified quietly, Hinata humming and tugging him along gently, gesturing to each Alpha in kind as he introduced them.
"This is Miya Osamu!" He reached out and touched the silver Alpha's chest, patting over his breastplate affectionately. "He's visiting for a few more days while on break from school, but he's heading back to college at the end of the week." He turned to look up at Akaashi, perking his ears up as he smiled. "I'm so glad you had a chance to meet before he left again! Having Osamu with us is a rare treat!" He glanced towards the golden Alpha standing beside him, adding cheekily, "Usually we're just stuck with entertaining Atsumu."
"Brat." Atsumu growled teasingly, reaching out to ruffle Hinata's hair, the tawny Alpha looking over and meeting Akaashi's eyes, giving him a friendly smile in greeting. "Miya Atsumu. It's nice to meet you, Akaashi."
"Yes, it's nice to meet you." Osamu echoed, pressing close to his twin's side, Hinata breaking away from Atsumu and swatting at him playfully before turning his attention to Bokuto, the quiet Alpha watching Akaashi from a short distance away, offering him a small smile shyly.
"Hey, Akaashi." He greeted with a little wave of his fingers, and Akaashi returned his smile, dipping back his ears a bit.
"Bokuto." The dark-haired omega greeted calmly, returning his attention to Hinata when the younger omega tugged him closer, gesturing towards one of the vintage booths nestled beneath another flower arch nearby.
"They're doing flower crowns! Let's pick out arrangements together!"
Akaashi laughed brightly at his enthusiasm, allowing Hinata to guide him along and glancing back over his shoulder towards Bokuto briefly, holding his gaze for only a moment before turning away again. Bokuto watched them go, his heart fluttering with emotion, reaching up to rub at his arm absently, Atsumu leaning closer to nudge his shoulder, Bokuto inhaling softly as he looked over to find the twins were watching him expectantly.
"Everything okay, Bo?" Atsumu asked curiously, one of his ears tilting to the side a bit, Osamu watching him closely as well, a knowing smile teasing across his lips.
"He's quite beautiful, Akaashi." Osamu mused, looking towards the omegas once more. "You said he's bonded?"
Bokuto hummed softly, arching his brow a bit. "They're intended, though I do not believe they've held a ceremony yet. From what I've observed, neither of them wear rings, and Akaashi isn't marked."
"I see." Osamu mused, crooning softly, taking a step closer towards the booths while watching Bokuto's expressions. "He's charming, and his scent is light and sweet. I can imagine just about any Alpha would be drawn to him."
"He's very attractive." Atsumu agreed softly, perking his ears towards Hinata and Akaashi as they laughed together and pointed towards blossoms here and there, the beta attendant dutifully picking out several flowers for their crowns, beginning to weave them together while the omegas watched. Atsumu was quiet for a moment longer before returning his gaze to Bokuto, asking after a moment, "He's the one, isn't he? Your first."
Bokuto blushed at that, ducking back his ears a bit, meeting Atsumu's gaze and nodding. Osamu hummed softly, perking his ears towards his brother then looking towards the omegas once more, saying softly beneath his breath, "Ah, I should have realized sooner, from the way he was looking at you before."
Bokuto flushed a deeper shade of crimson, flicking one of his ears to the side while stammering out, "L-Looking at me? What do you mean?" He snorted softly, his other ear twisting towards the sound of soft laughter nearby as a few girls passed under the entry arch, the taller Alpha stepping closer to the twins and leaning in to whisper anxiously. "You're mistaken, Osamu. Akaashi wasn't-"
"Oh, he was." Atsumu grinned, reaching out and patting Bokuto's shoulder, both of the twins offering Bokuto warm smiles and exchanging a glance before the tawny Alpha spoke again. "You were watching him too, when Hinata was introducing us. As soon as you set eyes on Akaashi, you completely lost your train of thought, mid-sentence. It was adorable, really."
Bokuto let out a soft, embarrassed huff and turned his face away, his entire face flushed as he tried to reign in his emotions, Osamu crooning softly and reaching out for him, asking gently, "Bokuto? Do you still have feelings for Akaashi?"
Bokuto closed his eyes and shivered beneath Osamu's light touch, replying back quietly, "There's a part of me that will always love Akaashi. That doesn't mean…" He perked his ears up a bit, catching the twins' eyes for a few moments before glancing towards the omegas again. "That doesn't mean anything has to come of it. I don't plan on telling him anything about how I'm feeling, other than the obvious parts he's already aware of. I've told him how much I missed him. Anything else would be just…"
He took a deep breath, carding his fingers through his silvery hair before letting out a rough sigh.
"It's too...it's so damn complicated with everything that happened between us in high school. I couldn't even begin to imagine trying to court Akaashi now, after everything we've been through." He frowned a little, ducking his ears back a bit. "That's assuming that Akaashi even wanted me to court him in the first place, or that Kuroo would trust me enough to allow me to do so…" He bit his lip, exhaling softly again. "I'm just happy to be close to him, watching over him while he's happy and smiling like this. Seeing him with Shouyou is just beautiful. It's far more fulfilling than I could have ever imagined it being, knowing that the two of them are starting to become good friends."
He took a step closer to the twins, then began walking slowly past them towards the booths, watching as Hinata helped Akaashi with his flower crown, balancing the halo of blossoms delicately atop his head, careful of his ears. The twins followed along at his side, Bokuto speaking to them in a hushed tone as they approached the giggling omegas.
"Shouyou brings out the best in me, the best in all of us. He has such a bright, gentle heart."
Osamu hummed his agreement, and Atsumu snorted softly, an affectionate smile across his face. "Yeah, he really, really does."
"We're lucky he loves us so much." Osamu added with a soft sigh. "It's amazing, seeing how far we've all come."
Hinata turned to smile up at Bokuto as the Alpha drew closer, reaching out to him and taking his hand while trying to stand still. Akaashi was quiet as he focused on finishing a few final adjustments before pulling back and admiring Hinata's flower crown, Bokuto watching both of the omegas fondly, Akaashi glancing up and meeting his eyes, his expression warm and soft.
"Shall we pick out a crown for you too?" Akaashi asked the quiet Alpha, and Bokuto blinked twice before laughing and shrugging a little, squeezing Hinata's fingers.
"If that's what you'd like, 'Kaashi." Bokuto agreed softly, the dark omega watching him with a light blush across his cheeks, Bokuto turning his attention to Hinata as his boyfriend pulled him closer to the booth excitedly, speaking with the beta attendant again and beginning to pick out several bright flowers for the Alpha's crown.
Atsumu and Osamu stood a short distance away, close enough to hear their conversation without being overheard as they talked back and forth quietly, watching the way Akaashi gazed longingly at Bokuto, the way he focused on Hinata and Bokuto's laced fingers, curling his own fingers against the hem of his shirt.
"He still loves Bokuto too, doesn't he?" Osamu whispered thoughtfully, and Atsumu hummed and leaned against his brother's shoulder lightly, nodding and nosing at his brother's cheek.
"Once Shouyou realizes, he'll try to bring them together again. This entire time they've been dating, Bokuto has been so quiet and reserved, too shy to seek out another partner aside from Hinata." His bronze eyes watched Akaashi's movements before drifting to Hinata and Bokuto, a soft croon lingering in his deep tone. "He has been completely open to polyamory, allowing Hinata to have various relationships with his chosen partners however he likes, but Bokuto has never shown interest in having anyone else for himself. I've honestly never seen him like this before. It reminds me of how timid and shy he was when he first started dating Hinata."
"He has been blushing a lot since Akaashi showed up, hasn't he?" Osamu laughed quietly, nudging his brother gently and perking his ears up while meeting his eyes, adding softly, "Promise me you'll keep me updated with any new developments? I'm sad I'll be back in class soon, and missing all the fun."
Atsumu exhaled softly through his nose, nuzzling his brother's cheek and kissing the curve of his jaw lightly, twining their fingers and squeezing reassuringly. "I'm sure Shouyou will keep you well informed, but I promise I'll send you updates as well."
Osamu hummed softly, his expression soft as he returned his brother's kiss, nosing at his cheek and inhaling softly against his warm skin, enjoying the bright sunshine shining down upon them, and the scent of warm petals drifting through the air.
Hinata called out to them a few moments later, beckoning them over to the booth, Atsumu squeezing his brother's fingers before starting over, Osamu easily matching his pace at his side, Hinata reaching out to them eagerly to pull both of the Alphas close.
-x-x-x-
Oikawa hummed thoughtfully to himself, standing back a bit to admire the painting before him, smiling at his progress and applying a few touchup strokes before setting his brush aside, taking a few moments to stretch towards the sunshine beaming down through the large bay window before his eyes flicked towards his desk. There were several photographs there, from Akaashi and Hinata's photoshoots, Oikawa shuffling through them for a few brief moments before pulling one of the photos from the pile, walking over to another canvas nearby, grabbing a pencil and starting to outline one of the side projects he wanted to work on while finishing his main project.
Portraits came easy to him, and so it took little time for him to render the desired pose across the fresh canvas, glancing between the reference photo and his sketch before smiling to himself, retrieving his palette, sorting through different shades of paint for a moment before beginning to fill in the background with soft, creamy yellow and eggshell white.
Sunshine and laughter, those were the feelings he wanted to capture when painting Hinata. His warm, honey-brown irises ringed with rich chocolate, the clustered flecks of amber around his pupils that only complimented his rosy cheeks and vibrant smile. He painted with care each and every detail, barely using the photo once he had begun, recalling the details from memory, remembering fondly the time they had spent together. He painted each stroke lovingly, defining Hinata's soft, plush lips, the rise of his cheeks, the dainty bridge and slight upturn of his small nose. He took his time getting each feature just right before starting to work on his vibrant hair, capturing the unforgettable sunset hues that framed his features in splashes of bright orange and hints of gold as he stood in the light of the sun.
He was breathless as he withdrew, sweat trickling down the side of his nape as he tried to catch his breath, setting aside his palette with trembling fingers and blinking at his work. The sun was starting to set, hours had gone by in what felt like moments. It would take some time for the layers of oil paint to dry, but he had finished Hinata's portrait flawlessly. The next time he visited the studio, he would work on Akaashi's portrait as well.
He laughed softly, crossing his arms over his chest and squeezing himself tightly, pushing back that pounding, aching feeling of his heart beating too quickly against his ribcage, forcing himself to breathe, fighting the urge to collapse onto the floor. His knees felt weak, and his thoughts were foggy, Oikawa stumbling back for just a moment before catching himself on the edge of his desk, his knuckles turning white as he clung to it desperately, choking on his own breath.
Not yet.
He bit his cheek, using the pain to center himself.
Not yet. You don't get to have me yet. I still have things to do.
He pushed past the pain, waiting for the wave of nausea to pass, and then gradually his breathing started to even out and he shakily sat down atop the edge of his desk, glancing towards the work in progress at his shoulder, his eyes tracing over the faces of the partners he cherished most in this world.
He closed his eyes, thinking about the months ahead of him, the months that would lead up to his death. His body breaking down, unable to control his movements or speech, reduced to only a fragment of his former self. It would be torture for them, watching him slowly withering into nothing. It would be cruel to ask them to watch over him and care for him, knowing there was nothing they could do to truly help him. He couldn't ask such a thing of them. He couldn't cause them so much pain. It gnawed at him, alive and feral, the thought of a slow, painful death.
He blinked away his tears, reaching shakily towards the upper drawer of the desk, sliding it out gingerly and glancing down at the shadowed contents within. There were paints here and there, half-used charcoals and bits of paper with scribbled notes about projects that remained unfinished. Projects that would never be continued. Projects that Oikawa had run out of time to pursue. He reached inside, shuffling some of the papers aside, retrieving a photograph of Iwaizumi, Sugawara, and Sawamura, lifting it to his chest and pressing it over his aching heart, hiccupping softly on a choked sob.
In the place where the photo had rested before, there was another object lying beneath, tucked away against the back of the drawer. It had been hiding there in that same spot from the date of its initial purchase, lying dormant in wait, never used and barely touched. It was meant only for one purpose and one purpose alone. A quick, painless death.
Oikawa didn't look at it, didn't want to think about it. He simply breathed in shakily and pressed the photograph tightly against his chest, tilting up his face towards the fading sunlight, tears coursing down his cheeks.
There was still time. There were things he had to finish.
For now, the object within the drawer would remain in that same shadowed place.
Thanks for reading! More to come!
