A Brits, a Yankee, a French and a Hun in Gallia


Squire, Hans, Bill, Brian, Edmond, Jack, Mikalai, Welkin, Alicia, Isara, Rosie and Welkin were inside the war room, as Welkin had called them for a meeting. «Gah, I'm starving. Why did they call us at lunchtime.» Largo sighed. «I say, I must agree with Largo over here. For you see, I intended to show you a new tank that has come to support our war effort! Yes….» Squire commented.

«Right. I'll begin the briefing right now.» Welkin responded. «You all might have noticed the recent hike in food prices. It's the Hongerwinter all over again.» Welkin continued. «Yeah. I do remember one worked at the mess hall mentioning that produce prices were rising.» Isara responded.

«Worker? We still have those? A-aren't all the people stuck fighting in the frontlines? Didn't the Gallian government already increased the conscription age?» Hans asked. «Well they are probably using child labor. Maybe that's also why there's food shortages. We're spending all on the military and are still scraping the barrel, really.» Bill commented.

«Bloody hell I wish we could receive some reinforcements. This is Torbuk all over again.» Jack commented. «Weeelll… what Bill said was right….but another reason is because the Imperials have taken hold of the trade route farmers use to ship their stock.» Welkin responded.

«Well I can only assume that the Imperial government, so sure that they will succeed in this conflict, is trying to get the people of Gallia used to starving. As much as I'm concerned, as soon as Gallia fall, it will be Gulags and starvation for everybody.» Squire commented.

«"Ja wirklich?" Hungersnot? Was ist das? Der Holodomor? (Really? Forced famine? What's this? The Holodomor?)» Hans asked annoyed. «Well there goes the bloody agriculture industry. At least there are no emus around.» Jack commented. «Well jee! Gallian people are starvin, and there ain't even a gaw damn dust storm!» Brian exclaimed.

Largo remained silent for a while. «Uh, boss? The fuck did you just say? What did they do?» Largo asked angrily. «Vegetable crisis grips Gallia. Not a very exciting headline.» Rosie commented. «Oh, believe me. It should concern you. As a British, I know what the Imperials are up to. Trying to starve us out, as they seem unable to penetrate our lines. It's the battle of Britain all over again, really.» Squire responded.

Largo punched the table in anger. «You mocking the power of vegetables!?» he exclaimed angrily. Bill raised an eyebrow. «Really? I mean this is what it angers you the most? The fact that some bloody Ruskies are taking some vegetables? I mean aren't you more angry at the fact that the Gallian populations are suffering progroms, force labor, deliberated famines, work to death, constant threat of violence, and a lot of nice labor camps in the middle of Siberia? Are you a sociopath or just mental?».

Largo simply snorted. «You don't understand. Vegetables are like bombs packed tight with all kind of important nutrients.» was his response. «Jeez. [I didn't know that this fanfiction was meant for kids.]» Squire commented. «[Eh…I don't know. Considering all the violence, swears and sometimes not so family friendly moments-]» Mikalai tried to speak but was interrupted.

«[He was being sarcastic, I'm afraid.]» Edmond responded. «Anyway, our job is to clear those routes of Imperials.» Welkin continued. He then turned to Squire. «And I would like to see this new tank you talked earlier.».

«Ah, yes! The tank! A tank destroyer, to be more specific. A fine beauty, and the new bane of the Imperial armed forces!» Squire responded. «Really? How does it look like?» Bill asked. «Literally no idea.» Squire responded.

Soon the squad was outside the building. «Well, to be honest, I've no idea how the tank looks like, but I've been informed it's one of a kind! Besides, it will surprise you that it's not something we made. No sir! Rather, we are talking of a Gallian tank destroyer! Goes by the name of Wagenjager "Hillen". No idea of what those words mean, really.» Squire commented.

«What? A Gallian tank? Oh that's actually really good!» Welkin exclaimed. «Glad you think that way. Mark my word, I'm sure that the Gallian industry might not be the greatest, but compensate quantity, with quali-ok what is that?» Squire asked disappointed.

The rest of the squad turned to see a tank destroyer, similar in form and shape to a Jagdpanzer 38, blue in coloration. Hans seemed satisfied with the design. «Oh you copied the Hetzer...I have to say it looks very sleek. Glad you decided to take note of German engineering as it is the best...well the early ones.» Hans commented satisfied.

The crew came out with smiley faces. «Thank you. Glad you enjoyed the design.». The commander, a Gallian man with raven black hairs was the first to speak. «Anyway my name is Lucas. Pleasure to meet you all.»Squire remained silent. «Well I mean that arguable, really. Why not coping the Churchill, the perfect tank for the gentleman pace.» he asked. The driver raised an eyebrow.

He was a man with long red hair. «Can it also be used as a tank destroyer?» he asked. Squire remained silent for a while, with a face full of disgust. «Eugh...on second thought don't. Just don't.» he continued. «Still, ye copied the Jerries...why? The M4 is a masterpiece! Why pick a German tank over the steel of freedom?!» Brian asked confused.

«If we want a tank like yours we will request the Federation to give us some of their Minute Tanks.» the gunner, a woman around her 20's with black raven hair matching Lucas ones responded. Brian remained silent in confusion. «The what now?» he asked confused. «The Minute tank is the main battle tank of the Federation. It looks a lot like yours.» Isara responded.

«Well, this sure is a surprise. Anything else I should be informed about?» Welkin asked Squire. «I'm afraid not really, mate.» Squire responded. «Except there is.» a voice came from behind. It was commander Varrot, on top of a M5A1. There were several others behind her.

«Godverdomme! (Holy shit!)» Welkin exclaimed. He then turned to Brian. «How many tanks did you guys have!?» he asked at Brian surprised. «Now to be fair, you would be wrong.» a voice came from one of the tanks. A man, a Chinese man, came out of one of the M5A1.

«I'm commander Zhang Wei of the Chinese Expeditionary Force in Gallia, at your service.» he said. The non Gallian members of the team remained silent in awkwardness. «Uhhh this is going to be awkward.» Squire commented. Wei looked confused.

«What are you talkin abo-»he asked confused, before seeing a Japanese B7A2 going to a freshly made airport. He remained silent as he understood what this meant. «Sooo….are the-» he was interrupted by Varrot. «The Japanese are on our side. Is there something the matter?» she asked.

The man looked extremely pissed at the answer. «Tóngzhìmen! Zhè shì wǒmen de jīhuì! Ràng wǒmen shā sǐ rìběn rén! (Come on comrades! This is our chance! Let's kill the Japanese!)» he exclaimed. «Uh what?» Welkin asked. He soon realized as the tanks drove forward so fast Varrot fell down, and when they pointed their guns at the B7A2.

«Oh no you don't!» Largo exclaimed. But before he could do anything, the large tank numbers were overwhelming the squad.


Meanwhile, in a grassy field, Irene was inspecting her later interviews. «Selectie 7 van Regiment 3. Eerste indruk ... niet slecht! (Squad 7 of Regiment 3. First impression...not bad!)» she commented to herself. She then massaged her chin. «Wanneer ze zich niet als achterlijk gedragen, kunnen ze behoorlijk goed presteren! Ik begin ze echt leuk te vinden! (Whenever they are not acting like retards, they can perform quite well! I'm starting to actually like them!)» she exclaimed.

But as she heard an explosion, she sighed. «Nogmaals... (Then again...)» she commented annoyed. «You can't stop us all! We survived the Japanese biological weapons!» Wei voice could be heard distantly. «Commander Zhang Wei! Stop this nonsense at once!» Varrot exclaimed.

« Faldio, we hebben hier een situatie! Het nieuwe vechtwagenregiment is net gemuteerd! Dit is Java helemaal opnieuw! (Faldio, we're having a situation here! The new tank regiment has just mutinied! This is Java all over again!)» Welkin exclaimed to the radio.

«You won't get to him! N-not because I like him or somethi-» Dallas exclaimed before almost being hit by a M5A1. «My gawd! Call the meds! They got the tomboy!» Brian exclaimed. «It's the Boxer war all over again! It's the Boxer war all over again! Calm down the lot of you! We gave you free helmets back in the day!» Hans exclaimed trying to calm the Chinese, only to receive multiple shots from the horde.

«Somebody! Quick! Get the bloody opium!» Squire exclaimed. «What the fuck is an opium!?» Rosie exclaimed in full panic mode. «DRUGS! GET THE DRUGS!» Edmond exclaimed as an answer. «HANS! GIVE ME THAT SHIT YOU GAVE ME AT VASEL!» Alicia exclaimed. «How could I have more than one! It's 1945 when I came from! We barely have any bandages!» he responded.

« De helden van Gallia, iedereen. (The heroes of Gallia, everybody.)» Irene sighed. She then looked at the sky, as she noticed a strange figure in the sky. Out of desperation, she got on her knees. «God, geef me alsjeblieft een gezicht. Waar ga je hiermee naartoe? (God, please give me a sight. Where are you going with this shit?)» she prayed. However, she noticed that it wasn't god who she saw. A A6M2, a P-47D-28 and an IK-3 flew in formation toward the Chinese tanks.

«Fox one! Fox one! Eyes on target! There are friendly on the area, so no bombs fellas!» the P-47D-28 exclaimed to the other planes. Soon, they start to fire at the general direction of the Chinese tanks, forcing them to stop. «Hell yeah! Nother job well done!» the P-47 pilot exclaimed.

Soon, however, one of the CR.42 arrived at the scene. «Don't shoot! I'm on your side! Didn't you get the communiqué!?» he exclaimed. «Not to worry fella! Those Chinamen were mutinating! They had it comin!» the P-47 pilot exclaimed. «W-well, in that case, you missed!» the CR.42 exclaimed.

«W-well they moved!» the P-47 pilot exclaimed. «You shot the commander on the leg!» the CR.42 shot back. «Well she got in the way. Besides, nothin in the world would have stopped good ol me against those god damn traitors!» the P-47 pilot exclaimed.

A short silence followed. «Let's just go to the airport. Seriously how did you even managed to bomb Rome?» the Italian pilot asked.

Meanwhile, on the ground, the Chinese had stopped. «And you better not make another bloody step, or I'll be forced, to order this shiny new tank destroyer to claim its first kill.» Squire exclaimed. «How could you side with the Japanese! They are the definition of monsters! Don't you know what they did at Nanking?» one Chinese exclaimed.

«Nan-what? S' some kind of weapon?» Brian asked confused. «They destroyed our capital! Raped every woman in the area! Killed thousands of our people!» he responded. «Really? Ye mean they did more than use just biological weapons?» Brian asked.

«Don't listen to the Chinese! It's just communist propaganda!» the A6M2 exclaimed, once he landed. «[Well there goes China as a possible viewer of this Fanfiction.]» Bill commented. «WHAT!? This is outrageous! Are you mocking us or something!?» the Chinese exclaimed.

«Look, I understand you chumps had it rough with the Japs, but this is no reason for attacking your new team mates.» Squire explained. «WHAT!? TEAM MATES!?» the same Chinese exclaimed. «Now now, a bit of an understanding has to be made. After all, look at Hans and Mikalai! They are just fine with one another! And one is a German and the other a Pole!» Squire exclaimed.

«I dunno. I still think I'll keep a distance from him.» Hans commented as he saw a somewhat murderous glare from Mikalai. «Besides, if you refuse to collaborate, I'm afraid you're slightly outnumbered.» Squire then said. Soon, the entire Chinese tank regiment was encircled by Gallian soldiers armed with Lancaars, alongside several Allied soldiers. Meanwhile, Squad 1 had arrived and pointed their big guns at the Chinese.

«Dà. Tài hǎole zhè yòu shì xúzhōule. (Great. Just great. This is Xuzhou all over again.)» one of the Chinese commented. «All right, we will collaborate, under the condition that we never work with the Japanese.» Zhang Wei responded. «Well jolly good. Glad we came to an understanding. And without casualties!» Squire exclaimed.

«Uh…do I count?» Dallas asked. «Are you dead? Or even badly injured?» Varrot asked. «Uh..no?» she responded. «Good. In that case you're good for service.» she coldly said. «And I hope that there are no more "misunderstanding", or I swear I'll put you to a death squad!» Varrot exclaimed to the Chinese.

She then turned to the airport. «And it looks like we received new support in the air. I'll inform of the coming operation.». She then turned toward the Chinese forces. «I hope for my sanity that not all the Chinese forces are like you.». Zhang Wei remained in silent for a while in awkwardness.

«Uh…yeah…considering the situation of the Chinese civil war…..I'd say that we are the last Chinese forces you'll ever see. Unless the Communist switch side.» he responded. «What!? Nonsense! No commie can beat freedom!» Brian exclaimed. The Chinese tanks all looked at him with disappointed looks.

«Let's just see who the new pilots are. I REALLY wanna know who almost chopped my leg off.» she then hissed, as she limped toward the airfield. There, the pilots were standing, all earning a murderous glare from Varrot. «Now now ma'am. On my defense, it's not easy firing at tanks from a plane.» the American pilot justified himself.

Varrot remained silent. «What's your name?» she asked coldly and angrily at the same time. «Christopher ma'am.» was his response, as he sweated a bit. Varrot remained silent. «Let's just get inside. So I can brief to you the next mission.» she growled at the pilot. «And you two are coming too. And you too, Mr.?» she continued, then turning to the CR.42 pilot.

«Alessandro, ma'am!» he exclaimed. «Mr. Alessandro, while you are at it, I want you to get me one of the He 111 H-3 pilots. He's coming too.» she ordered the man with a calmer tone.


Some time passed, and on the outskirt of Vasel, in a small village, the Imperial/Soviet troops were patrolling in the night. One of the Soviet soldiers was enjoying some of the fruits that were taken from the village. « V zaklyucheniye! Nemnogo yedy! YA ne videl nichego podobnogo za eti dni! (Finally! Some food! I haven't seen anything like this in days!)» he commented, before being punched by Largo.

«Fucking commies.» he silently commented. «Be quiet Largo! You want them to hear us?» Bill asked irritated. «Yeah. I know. I'm just slightly pissed at the fact that those bastards are stealing our veggies!» he exclaimed with a low tone. Bill however looked puzzled for a second.

«By the way. This is a night operation. Couldn't they just send a group of Lancasters?» he asked. «[Nah. They're not in the Fanfiction yet. But they might appear soon.]» Squire responded.

«Anyway, we better move and deal with the blockade.» Rosie commented. «Roger that mate!» Jack responded. The squad, composed by Squire, Bill, Brian, Hans, Edmond, Jack, Mikalai, Welkin, Largo, Rosie, Jann, Isara and Alicia, all equipped with their infantry equipment for the occasion, managed to sneak in the various alleys of the village. The Imperial soldiers were largely absent. It was likely that they were being deployed elsewhere.

The few soldiers present there were all killed stealthy by the infantry. Soon, the squad found their target: two Imperial T-58. Squire remained silent for a while. «Well there's the blockade. And judging by the noise their….oddly vulnerable engines they are making, I say somebody is in there. The question is, how do we eliminate them? I propose a tactical maneuver behind the enemy tank, while one of us cause significant noise in front of them. Then we could-ok where did Mikalai and Edmond go?» Squire interrupted himself annoyed.

The French and the Pole managed to sneak behind the tank placing explosive to the engine. Then, they walked away for a bit and blew up the charges, destroying the tanks. The two looked at the rest of the squad with satisfaction. « Oh ja. Französisch und Polen sind gut in Guerilla. Typisch. (Oh yeah. French and Poles being good in guerrilla. Typical.» Hans commented. Annoyed.

«Looks like the town is ours.» Jann commented. «In that case…» Brian exclaimed. He then got the speaker. «Greeting local people. America has arrived. Now now, no need to thank us, you are welcome!» Brian exclaimed. Soon, the local population, who were inside their houses, came out to greet the squad as liberators.

«See? This is more gaw damn like it!» Brian exclaimed. «A quiet mission with no too much violence? Limited retardness? Our sanity not getting lower and lower? Is this a blessing in disguise?!» Alicia exclaimed happily. «Indeed. Something is off.» Bill commented.

«I say Bill, what could it possibly be?» Squire asked. «[I mean, the chapter being already over? We barely did anything. Even the first chapter had more content.]» Bill commented. «[Well, I can only assume that the author must be tired. Probably wasting time with that other fanfiction nobody has seen, the Second Universe Tales, Universalia Fight Club. Really, why bother with something that doesn't work, instead of continuing this story? I mean for god shake he even made a bloody remake!]» Squire responded.

However, the rumbling of a tank could be quickly heard. Soon, a M24(TL) came out of the shadows. «Don't shoot! Don't shoot! I'm from Hong Kong!» the tank commander exclaimed in a hurry. The squad looked at the tank confused. «I say chump, is something the matter?» Squire asked.

«Oh thank god you don't want me dead. I've been targeted by allied tanks this whole time!» he continued. «Allied tanks? D-didn't they receive the communiqué?» Welkin asked confused. Hans paled for a second. «And…..what "Allies" tried to shoot you?» he asked.

Largo raised an eyebrow. «What do you mea-oh.» he interrupted as he realized what possible "Allie" could be shooting at another allied tank. A Soviet one. «W-well, it was a horde of-» the Hong Kong commander was interrupted by a shell that hit several civilians.

Many more civilians were hit before they could ran to safety. « FUCK! THEY KILLING FUCKING CIVILIANS! WHERE'S MR HORKE WHEN YOU NEED HIM? » Jack exclaimed. « Oh dear, I'm going to be sick!» Bill exclaimed. «Oh dear! At least not on my dress!» Squire exclaimed, but it was too late: Bill vomited on the British.

«Jesus! What the hell is goin on!?» Brian exclaimed, before a horde of T-34 surrounded the squad. «Oh god! It was a Soviet ambush! Keep a bullet for the Siberian soldiers, or you'll beg for death!» Hans exclaimed. «HA! You're wrong! We're not Soviets! We're far worse!» a tank commander responded.

It was a Chinese. «You! You betrayed us!» Alicia exclaimed. «Betrayed you? We don't even know who you are!» he shot back. «Nonsense! You're Chinese, right!?» Isara exclaimed. The tank commander sighed. «Wrong China. We're communists. True friends of the Soviet Union and, as such, the Empire. It's a long story.» he responded.

«Oh, never mind what I just said.» Alicia apologized. «[Well I guess this is how the chapter is going to be filled.]» Bill commented.

«Anyway, you're all surrounded, imperial pigs! Submit to Maoism! » the tank commander exclaimed. «Good luck with that. I like to see you try.» Squire shot back. «Honestly, it worked jackshit. And caused the dreaded "Great Leap Forward", and the "Cultural Revolution". The death toll? Many more than Stalin had killed.» the Hong Kong commander then said.

«Geez, we arrived to fucking late to save China from Communism! McCarthy is right! The Chinaman was right! The Red Scare IS ALREADY HERE! YOU'RE NEXT! YOU'RE NEXT!» Brian exclaimed in full panic mode. «I'm pretty sure this is the last of our worry.» Isara commented. « Dirty British Pigs, give us Hong Kong or else!» the Chinese tank commander exclaimed.

«Not until 1997. As Long As Forever! Plus, you will only have the New Territories, but not all of the Pearl of the Orient!» Squire proudly announced. «I know the lease expires in 97, but us Chinese want all of HK transferred to the People's Republic in its entirety!» the tank commander shot back.

«Uh, not to be that guy, but could we avoid having this discussion right now? We probably have better things to do, such as, you know, nod DYING!?» Welkin exclaimed angrily. «Never! This is a question of British prestige in danger here! We lost Hong Kong once already, we won't lose it again!» Squire exclaimed.

« Super goed. We zijn erbij. Geschroefd en omringd door idioten. (Great. We're screwed. Screwed and surrounded by idiots.)» Alicia commented. But once again, luck was on our heroes side. Christopher, on his shiny P-47D-28, dived on the Chinese tanks, knocking out several of them.

«YEEEHAW! USAF once again saves the day!» the pilot exclaimed. «Hey losers! America comin trough. Time to kill some gaw damn commies!» he exclaimed once again. But there were still a lot of tanks. «Well….those were sad losses. But you still cannot-» the Chinese pilot was interrupted by a shell hitting one of the tanks.

«Huh. That might do it.» he commented. The Hillen, hidden in some bushes, had managed to take several good shots at the tanks, distracting the Chinese. « Goed geschoten, zus! (Good shooting, sis!)» Lucas exclaimed. The gunner sighed annoyed.

« Je weet dat je me als schutter moet aanspreken, toch? (You know you should address me as gunner, right?)» she responded to him. « Oh kom op Laurien. Wat denk je dat dit is? [Een generiek geanimeerd avontuur met een te dichte jongen omringd door aantrekkelijke meisjes die hem regelmatig verslaan met een grote zus die hem dagelijks slaat?] Trouwens, ik ben technisch gezien de oudere broer, heb ik niet de leiding? (Oh come on Laurien. What do you think this is?[ A generic animated adventure with an overly dense boy surrounded by attractive girls who beat him regularly with a big sister that beats him daily?] Besides, I'm the elder brother so technically, aren't I in charge?)» Lucas responded.

« Je weet wel dat we een tweeling zijn en dat het verschil in leeftijd maar een paar minuten is, toch? (You do know that we're twins, and that the difference of age is just a few minutes, right?)» she complained. Still, the tank continued shooting down the Chinese tanks until none were left.

«Well that sure was a sure a lot of bloody luck. I'm glad that we made it alive.» Squire commented. «I mean, not to be cocky….but I was kind of expecting that. It always goes this way, really: we are in trouble, we got encircled, a random person arrives and we finish off the threat.» Welkin commented.

«Well what can I say. Luck rewards the brave. And we must obviously be the bravest men on the plane-» Squire was interrupted by a shell, which hit the M24 and destroyed. Squire sighed. «Now what?» Rosie asked exasperated.


Behind a large bush, an IS-2 was the one responsible for the shot. « Kha! Nikogda ne posylayte kitaytsa, chtoby sdelat' russkuyu rabotu. (Ha! Never send a Chinese to do a Russian job.)» the commander proclaimed. « Ser! My poluchili soobshcheniye ot impertsev! Oni napravlyayut tanki v nashu storonu! (Sir! We have received a message from the Imperials! They are sending tanks toward our direction!)» the driver warned the commander.

« Khorosho khorosho. Kogda oni pribudut? (Good, good. When will they arrive?)» he asked. « Ser! Kazhetsya, oni pribyli tol'ko seychas! (Sir! They seem to have arrived just now!)» the driver response. Soon, the tank commander recognized several of these tanks, such as the T-58 and T-68. But then he saw a weird looking tank.

It was identical to a Panzer IV, but painted with the Imperial colors. « Privet, tovarishch. Vy gotovy unichtozhit' gall'skuyu mraz'? (Hello comrade. Are you ready to destroy the Gallian scum?)» one of the commanders of the new tank asked the IS commander.

« Privet, tovarishch. Vy zakhvatili kakoy-to Panzer IV? (Uh hello comrade. Did you capture some Panzer IV?)» the IS commander asked. « Okh, sovsem net. Eto novaya model' tanka. T-IV. Eto nedavno vyshlo iz zavodov, i ono uzhe delayet rabotu protiv Federatsii. (Oh not at all. This is a new tank model. The T-IV. It has came out of the factories recently, and it's already doing the job against the Federation.)» was the T-IV response.

« O, tak eto nekotoryye iz vashikh zamen dlya srednego tanka, nu, my deystvitel'no ispol'zovali nekotoryye Panzer III, kotoryye my zakhvatili nekotoroye vremya nazad ... no ya mog by porekomendovat' posmotret' na nashi T 34? Vy ne budete razocharovany. (Oh, so those are some of your replacements for the medium tank, well we did use some Panzer III's that we captured a while back...but could I recommend looking at our T 34's? You won't be disappointed.)» the IS commander commented.

« Vo vsyakom sluchaye, zaryazhayte tovarishchi! Za Rodinu! (Anyway, charge comrades! For the motherland!» the IS commander exclaimed. Soon, a large horde of tanks formed, charging at the village, and a Russian song could be heard.


«Well now. So much for this being a stealth mission.» Rosie commented. «Well you're not wrong. But at least we know what killed our Hong Kong friend. It's an IS!» Bill commented. «[How many times must the author say it! This fanfiction is not related to the Second Universe! It's two different canons!]» Squire exclaimed.

«[Oh it's not an exoskeleton for highly attractive teenage girls. It's actually a Soviet tank.] And there also seems to be a tank that I've not seen yet. Looks German thought.» Bill commented.

« Was ist das ... was zur HÖLLE ist das? Diese antideutschen imperialen bolschewistischen Bastarde stehlen unsere Technologie! Zerstöre es ... nein, rette es ... Oh, ich weiß es verdammt noch mal nicht ... nimm ihre Hände von unseren Sachen! (What is that...what the HELL is that!? Those anti-German imperial Bolshevik bastards are stealing our technology! Destroy it...no save it...Oh I don't fucking know...get their hands of our stuff!)» Hans exclaimed angrily.

« This is weird. What is this? A German civil war?» Jack commented at the sight of the tanks. « Euh ... d'abord les Gallians et maintenant eux ... pourquoi tout le monde copie-t-il le foutu bosch. (Er...first the Gallians and now them...why is everyone copying the freaking bosch.)» Edmond complained.

«Wait so are the Germans on our side or are they the enemy again? Oh this is confusing as hell!» Brian exclaimed, as the tanks arrived en masse. « Well this is familiar. I remember blowing up plenty of those Panzers in...oh.» Squire interrupted himself after seeing Hans glare.

Squire remained silent for a while. «So…I don't suppose we aren't equipped with, oh you know, some sort of anti tank weapons, right?» Squire asked. «Well, there's still us, darling.» Jann said with a feminine voice, as he referred to himself and Largo. «Euh….I would recommend maintaining a safe distance between me and you. By the way, interested in joining the navy?» Squire asked.

«Don't worry, limey! We're ready to smash sum Imperial….Panzers or somethin?» Brian announced, as he pulled out a bazooka out of nowhere. Hans then pulled out a Panzerschreck, while Edmond and Mikalai pulled out boys anti tank rifles. «I say Bill, shall we?» Squire asked smiling.

«I think we should.» Bill responded. The two then pulled out a PIAT rifle for each other. Soon, the whole squad was pointing at the tanks. The Hillen, in the meantime, started to shoot down several tanks, but many were also missed. « Zus wat is dit in hemelsnaam !? Ik heb het je meerdere keren verteld. Munitie. Zijn. Bloed. (Sis what the hell is this!? I told you multiple times. Ammunitions. Are. Blood.)» Lucas scolded his sister.

« Het spijt me commandant, [maar dit richtsysteem is kapot! Alles wat er staat is één schot om te doden, en zelfs dan zegt het me niet of ik goed mik!] (I'm sorry commander, [but this aiming system is broken! All it says is one shot to kill, and even then it doesn't tell me if I'm aiming well!])» the girl apologized.

« Ah ja natuurlijk! [Een systeem dat je het aantal schoten vertelt dat je nodig hebt om een tegenstander te doden, maar je niet toestaat om goed te richten tenzij je in de buurt bent. Het is bijna alsof ze doen alsof we dicht bij de tegenstander zijn in plaats van ver in veilige verdedigende posities te zijn! Oh god, onze commandanten en tactici zijn idioten.] (Ah yes, of course! [A system that tells you the amount of shots you need to kill an opponent but doesn't allow you to aim properly unless you are near. It's almost like they pretend us to be near the opponent rather than being far in safe defensive positions! Oh god our commanders and tacticians are morons.])» Lucas sighed.

« Hoe kunnen de imperialen ons nu in godsnaam verslaan !? (How the hell are the Imperials managing to beating us only now!?)» the driver asked. « Was dat een nederlaag, Dirk? (Was that defeatism, Dirk ?)» Laurien asked suspicious.

Meanwhile, in the village, the squad was not having an easy time. On top of many tanks needing more than just a single shot to be killed, they were just too many in numbers. And not even Christopher plane could help, as he was running out of ammunition. «My gawd! This ain't looking good! There's too many of them Welks! What we're gonna do!?» Brian asked worried.

«I still advocate for the blend in plan!» Welkin exclaimed. «Well I guess that even you can hide at night…» Bill commented. «Right! Everybody, get in the bloody bushes! Not time to waste!» Squire exclaimed. Soon, the squad managed to hide, avoiding the sight of the enemy tanks. «Fiendish.» Squire commented, as he believed that he was well hidden.

Soon, the Imperial/Soviet tanks arrived at the village. «Right. Everybody, act naturally. No sudden movements, we do not wanna be see-Oh come bloody on! How did they even see-oh. I see. They're painted green and brown.» Squire interrupted himself multiple times as the Imperial/Soviet tanks found them.

«It's over capitalist pigs! Put your hands up and surrender.» the IS-2 tank commander announced. «Never! Lads! Open fire with whatever you have! Machine guns, handguns, rifles! Everything!» Squire exclaimed. «This is insanity! I think I'm gonna faint!» Edmond commented.

«Yeah I know right! This is pretty exiting!» Bill exclaimed. «FIRE!» Squire exclaimed. Soon, the IS-2 received the fire from the squad, largely unaffected. « [YA dumayu, chto oni strelyayut v tank Infinite Stratos!] ([I think they are shooting at the Infinite Stratos tank!])» one of the T-IV laughed.

Meanwhile, the Hillen did nothing. «Zus? (Sis?)» Lucas asked. «Ja? (Yes?)» Laurien responded desperate. « We hebben geen munitie meer, toch? (We're out of ammunition, aren't we?)» he asked, sighing. «Jep. (Yep.)» she responded. Meanwhile, our heroes had finally ran out of ammunitions.

«Well, bullocks.» Squire commented. « Vse tanki gotovyatsya k otkrytiyu ognya. (All tanks, prepare to open fire.)» the IS-2 tank commander ordered the other tanks. However, coming to the rescue of our heroes was a He 111 H-3, alongside Alessandro CR.42, an A6M2 and a IK-3. But they were not alone. Alongside them was a squadron of Lancaster B Mk I and a Hs 129 B-2.

«I say Mr. Phillip, are those the tanks you were assigned to?» one of the Lancasters asked. «Yes its them. Glad they are still alive considering I had to escort you to them.» the He 111 H-3 pilot announced. «Very well lads. Drop the bombs.» the Lancaster pilot announced.

The Hs 129 B-2 is the first to fire, taking down two of the enemy tanks. « Mach dir keine Sorgen Kameraden! Der Panzer-Quacker ist da! (Do not worry comrades! The Panzer-Quacker is here!)» he exclaimed.

Soon, a large payload of bombs was dropped on the Soviet/Imperial forces, destroying them. Soon, trying to destroy the bombers, a swarm of I-153 arrived, but they were no match for the fighters and the self defensive equipment of the bombers.

« Man, these soviets had the worst planes in this war.» the IK-3 pilot commented. « Yeah, and their pilot training is shitty.» Alessandro responded after gunning down another plane. One of the I-153 tried to get behind Phillip plane, only to be shot down by his self defense equipment.

« Ahh, more free victories for Deutschland!» he exclaimed victorious. « Of course, Jerry. I wonder what they were training on?» the Lancaster pilot asked with a hint of sarcasm. Soon, the I-153 swarm was dealt with, with the remaining planes flying away.

«Well that was a stroke of bloody luck. Again.» Squire commented. «[Also I noticed that there are a lot of references to Infinite Stratos. Wonder if we are sponsored by Eight Bit Inc. in any way?]» Bill asked. Squire shook his head in disagreement. «[Nah, I'd say that the author is trying to advertize it's more serious fanfiction Second Universe Tales, Universalia Fight Club, the remake that is. He must be desperate for feedback, that is.]» Squire responded.

«That was a close one! We need a baguette with cheese and wine to celebrate...hey mademoiselle Alicia...bake us some baguettes!» Edmond exclaimed. She smiled back. «Ok. Now that we have the ingredients, we might as well.» she responded. Largo simply laughed hard.

«Glad we survived! And we even solved the veggie shortage! Did you know my father was a farmer?» he asked the group. «Well that might explain your veggie problem. I mean we risked our bloody lived and you worry just about vegetables?» Bill asked annoyed.

Largo simply laughed. «Not to worry. You are a colorful bunch, but I'm starting to like you.» he smiled. «Colorful? I mean I guess the frog over here, but we are all wearing useful, top of the military camouflage uniforms, yes.» Squire responded. Mikalai shook his head in disappointed.

«He meant that we are weird. Also could we have some kielbasas while we're at it?» he then asked Alicia. «What's that!? Sum commie food!?» Brian exclaimed angrily. «T-they don't even have food. I'm pretty sure that Mikalai here is not part of the Polish Communist Party!» Hans defended the Pole.

Welkin simply smiled at his comrades. «Come on. Let's go back to the base.» he said. He then picked up a radio. « Lucas, kunnen we liften? (Lucas, can we hitch a ride?)» he asked. A sigh could be heard. « Nou, we hebben tenminste geen tekort aan brandstof. (Well at least we're not short on fuel.)» Lucas responded disappointed.

Alicia smiled. «I hope they arrive soon! I have baguettes to bake!» she exclaimed happily. «Now we're talking! Vive la France!» Edmond exclaimed. «Frog, if you even dare singing the French anthem!» Squire exclaimed. Ignoring the threat, Edmond started to sing.

«That's it! Every French in this town is getting exterminated!» Squire exclaimed in comic anger. The Gallians simply laughed at the scene. They were starting to like this magnificent men in their armored machine.


Hello guys!

For those interested in my other more serious fanfiction, search for Second Universe Tales Universalia Fight Club Remake.

In the meantime, everytime I underline something like this, it means I'm using one of the quotes you chump suggested.

I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! Please review so I can learn your opinion. I'm willing to accept suggestions, so stay tuned. Also remember to like and follow. See you on the next chapter.