A/N: Chapters 8 & 9 were pretty dark, so it's time that we had something to lighten things up a little. To those of you who have guilty pleasures yourselves, this is a chapter for you!
Disclaimer: I don't own Ricochet or Droop-a-Long. All I own are the novels that appear, as well as Denise and Felicia.
Story 10: Guilty Pleasure
It was a lazy summer afternoon in Hoop 'n Holler, and most of the residents of the town were out and about. Others, such as Ricochet Rabbit and his deputy, Droop-a-Long, were staying inside to work on paperwork and keep cool, as well as keeping the place tidy.
"Did the mail come yet, Droop-a-Long?" Ricochet asked.
"I think it did, Mr. Ricochet," his deputy replied. He was at the table squeezing lemons for lemonade. "Nowadays, they leave packages right outside the door."
"I'll go out an' check if we got anythin' today."
When Ricochet opened the door, a very large package was waiting for him. Upon examining it, he picked it up and walked back inside. "Deputy Droop-a-Long, you've got a package," he said.
Droop-a-Long's ears perked up at that. "A package for me?" he asked. "Who's it from?"
Ricochet's face turned upwards into a sly smirk. "It's from Denise," he said. "I reckon it's mighty important."
Droop-a-Long ran over to grab the package, leaving the pitcher of lemonade hanging in midair for a moment. Ricochet raced to catch it, and it fell neatly into his arms, albeit with some lemon juice splashing on his vest. "Geez, don't get too excited, Droop!" he said, looking at the coyote.
Droop-a-Long was too busy opening the package to pay attention to Ricochet's warning. His tail wagged with excitement as he stared inside. "Finally, the books she said she was gonna send," he said.
Ricochet looked at Droop-a-Long in surprise. "I didn't know you were an avid reader, Droop-a-Long."
"Oh, I love readin' books, Mr. Ricochet," Droop-a-Long replied. "'specially the books that she sends. They're pretty good. They've got a lot of adventure, suspense...you'd like them."
Ricochet watched as Droop-a-Long pulled out three books: one red, one blue and one purple. As Droop-a-Long put the books down on the table, he took a look at the covers and saw images of a male coyote and a female rabbit standing together in a forest, looking lovingly in each other's eyes. He made a face. "These are the books you're readin', Droop? They're romance novels!" he said.
Droop-a-Long blushed in embarrassment. "Like I said, there's suspense an' adventure, too, Mr. Ricochet. There's a really good subplot in the second book about the lady's brother tryin' ta-"
"Look, Droop-a-Long...romance novels just ain't my thing," Ricochet interrupted. "'sides, I can tell just from the cover alone that it's gonna be one of those really romantic stories."
Droop-a-Long sighed. "Whatever you say, Mr. Ricochet," he said. "I'd best be gettin' back to that lemonade."
"I agree. I'm gettin' right parched." Ricochet gave the pitcher back to his deputy, then took another look at the book and groaned. Just another pile of mushy nonsense.
Later that evening...
Ricochet sighed as he put aside the last few sheets of his paperwork, and reclined back in his chair to prop his feet up on the desk. "Ah, finally got that paperwork done," he remarked. "Today really was a slow day after all."
He took a look around the office, which was now spotless thanks to Droop-a-Long's meticulous cleaning from earlier. The coyote had gone to his room after watching one of the Westerns on TV, and he'd taken the other two books with him. Ricochet wished that Droop-a-Long hadn't, though, because now he had nothing to do and no one to talk to. There wasn't anything good on TV after ten, and he couldn't exactly go around town at ten at night and ask people to come down to the office to chat with him. Now that he thought of it, it sounded more like he was trying to arrest people rather than spend a quiet evening playing Go Fish.
He groaned, folding his arms. He was bored. And he absolutely hated to be bored.
"I guess I'll jus' turn in, too," Ricochet decided. He got up from his chair, and started to walk upstairs, only for something to catch his eye. The first of the romance novels that Denise had sent Droop-a-Long sat next to the spare phone. He shook his head and continued to head upstairs. As bored as he was, he wasn't so bored he'd pick up the thing he didn't like and read it.
After all, he'd made it clear to Droop-a-Long that he didn't like romance novels.
Then again, Droop-a-Long did say it had adventure in it. And he did have a love of adventure.
He'd made it clear to Droop-a-Long that he didn't like romance novels.
There was probably suspense in there, too. And suspense never failed to keep his interest.
He groaned as he started back down the stairs, grabbed the book, and went back upstairs to his room. "Darn you, Droop-a-Long," Ricochet muttered. His will hadn't been strong enough.
He opened the doors to his room, pausing only to turn on the light. In a matter of seconds, a dark amber light filled the room from the ceiling, and Ricochet made his way inside, taking off his cowboy hat and setting it on the doorknob of his closet. His room was smaller than Droop-a-Long's, and as such, there weren't a lot of things he had inside. Most of his things were set in a trunk that rested at the end of his bed, while everything else that couldn't fit in the trunk went in the closet.
Setting the book on the desk, Ricochet went to his closet and got dressed for bed. After hanging up his vest, he turned on the lamp, went over to his desk, and turned off the overhead light. Gathering the book in his hands, he hopped into bed, fluffing his pillow.
Ricochet sighed as he read the cover. "Maybes and What-Ifs by Felicia Rodriguez. Heh, the main characters kinda remind me of Droop and Denise. Well, let's see what hooked those two on this novel, huh?"
With that, he opened the book to the first page and started to read...
X
"Our decision is final, Gwendolyn. We have arranged for you to marry Sebastian Starkweather in order to combine his fortunes with ours."
"It's in everyone's best interests, Gwen. You still get to be a part of the High Society, and you have an influential businessman as your husband. You'll be well-cared for, and you might just learn a thing or two in the process."
I felt as though the air had been knocked out of my chest.
My mother and father stared me down, their faces calm and peaceful...which was the opposite of what they had been feeling moments ago. They had yelled and screamed at me until their voices had gone hoarse, their faces the color of a tomato. When they had stopped talking, I figured I had won against them again. They could never say no to their oldest daughter. They just couldn't.
So when my father told me that I wasn't going to marry my childhood sweetheart, Ashton, and my mother told me that they had arranged for me to be placed with a person named Sebastian Starkweather, I couldn't say a word. I looked into their faces and saw that no amount of pleading or bribing would get them to change their minds. Their eyes were set into steel, hard glares.
I did the only thing I could do: say that I understood like the good, responsible daughter I was supposed to be, and then I ran upstairs, fell on my bed and cried.
Were my parents trying to utterly humiliate me? Sebastian Starkweather is a coyote from the same estate that we live in! I've never met him, but I've heard enough to know that he's an unpleasant person. He's greedy, he's overly ambitious and charms people right out of their funds. That's to be expected, given what he is.
And now..now I'll never see Ashton again. I'll belong to Sebastian and he'll be free to do whatever he likes with me. When a woman marries, she gives up all hopes of retaining her independence; her husband now rules over her and her children, whom she'll be expected to take care of.
The mere thought of having children with him of all people sickens me...But I suppose I shall have to grin and bear it, as I do whenever I encounter unpleasant things.
And I have the feeling that this is going to be most unpleasant.
X
Ricochet looked over at the next page, where the second chapter was listed. He couldn't believe he was saying this, but he was much more wide awake than he was a few minutes ago. Even though the first chapter had been incredibly short, it'd been enough to interest him. So many questions rang through his mind as to what this rebellious, spoiled girl was going to do now that she was being married off to her worst enemy.
All he had to do to find out was to keep reading.
He sighed. There was no need to even try and resist. "Well, I guess one more chapter wouldn't hurt. But after this, I'm headin' to bed."
Ricochet would eventually go to bed...after two hours had gone by.
Gwendolyn and Ashton had been broken up by her parents was because the two were trying to rush their relationship a little too fast, and had been caught in the act as well-thankfully, they didn't go into excessive detail about it, but Ricochet still couldn't help but blush at the descriptions. In order to avoid scandal and to teach their daughter a lesson, they had her married off to Sebastian, an arrogant and ambitious coyote that Gwendolyn hated. When they met for the first time at a party to welcome some new neighbors into the high society, they got off on an uneasy foot; both of them remarked that if neither of them were the species that they were, they would be quite attractive. After that came the wedding, followed by bits of bickering between them that drove both sides of their family crazy.
Despite having gotten off on the wrong foot, the two slowly got used to their personalities and, though they wouldn't admit it, secretly admired each other for them. Gwendolyn would eventually appreciate his determination and kind nature, while he would appreciate her honesty with her feelings and her not breaking her word on things that mattered to her. This admiration started to turn into love, but both of them found it hard to admit their feelings for each other because of their pride. Plus, Ashton, upset at having been jilted, was now trying to win her heart back, while another ambitious business owner attempted to get the goods on Sebastian by using his daughter, Catherine, to try and woo him over.
By the time Ricochet had gotten tired enough to stop reading, it was one in the morning. He sighed as he put the book back on the table. He had to admit that it was pretty good...for a romance novel. Upon hearing Droop-a-Long's snores, he realized that Droop-a-Long might take the books back into his room and read them. And he knew the coyote would find it odd if he suddenly asked for the books when he'd clearly told Droop-a-Long that he wasn't interested in them.
Ricochet sighed. "Well...guess I'll have to read this when I'm finally alone," he said. "But how can I read it when Droop-a-Long's probably gonna be about?"
After pondering on this for a moment, he snapped his fingers. "I've got it!"
The next morning...
"Here's your coffee, Mr. Ricochet," Droop-a-Long said. "Ya look like you need it."
Indeed, Ricochet did look exhausted, what with his bloodshot yellow eyes and slouched over demeanor. He perked up slightly when he saw his deputy come over to him with a cup of coffee. "Thanks, Droop-a-Long," he said, taking the cup from him.
"Paperwork keep you up all night?"
It took all it had in him to not visibly jump at that question. "Yep," Ricochet said. That was part of the truth. "There was a good bit of it, too." Now that part was a complete lie. He hid his unease behind his cup of coffee.
"Well, at least you got it all done, Mr. Ricochet," Droop-a-Long said. "Iffin' you don't need me to do anythin' right now, Mr. Ricochet, I'll be off to read my book."
Ricochet knew it was time for him to put his plan into action. "Actually, Droop-a-Long, I'm kinda in the mood for those carrot cake biscuits," he said. "I'd get 'em myself, but I figured I may need to stay by the phone jus' in case."
"Yeah. Someone might need your help today," Droop-a-Long said. "I'll run by the diner and get those biscuits for ya, Mr. Ricochet."
"Thank you, Droop-a-Long," Ricochet answered. "I appreciate it."
"No problem," Droop-a-Long replied as he lumbered over to the door. "I reckon it should be open right about now." And with that, Droop-a-Long was gone.
After waiting for a few seconds to make sure his deputy wasn't coming back, Ricochet pulled the book out from under the pile of paperwork on his desk. A wide grin broke out on his face as he turned to the page where he had left off. Being a speed reader, he was already in the middle of the book. "Droop-a-Long doesn't know that this is the real reason I'm so tired. But I ain't gettin' any sleep 'til I find out what's gonna happen at the end," he said. Leaning back in his chair, he reclined his feet on the table and started to read. "Now, to finally wrap up this subplot once and for all."
No sooner had he gotten to the third page than the door suddenly burst open, causing Ricochet to shriek with surprise and jump out of his chair. Standing in the doorway was Droop-a-Long, who was holding a big white box.
"Oh, Mr. Ricochet, you're gonna love this!" he said. He then looked at the book in Ricochet's hands, and then at the sheriff himself. "Ain't that the book Denise sent me?"
Ricochet's face felt like an inferno. He looked at the floor, utterly embarrassed.
"Mr. Ricochet?" Droop-a-Long asked. "Are ya alright?"
"Uh...w-well, Droop-a-Long, this ain't what it looks like..."
"It looks like you ended up readin' a certain part in that book, Mr. Ricochet," Droop-a-Long said. "Ta be honest, I was redder than a tomato, too..."
"That ain't the reason why, Droop! And I ain't even near that part!" Ricochet said. He then realized that he'd just busted himself, and he sighed. "Ah, you caught me, Droop. Truth is, the reason I was so tired was because I stayed up late readin' this book-and then stayed up an extra thirty minutes thinkin' about it." His cheeks burned even more with embarrassment. "And now...I can't put it down."
Silence filled the office for a few moments. Then, Droop-a-Long said, "You know, I kinda felt the same way you do about those stories, Mr. Ricochet."
"You did?" Ricochet asked.
The coyote nodded. "I didn't like them either, until Denise actually read them to me," he said. "Afterwards, I realized that they weren't so bad after all. I guess that's what you meant by 'never judge a book by its cover', Mr. Ricochet."
"Yeah, pretty much," Ricochet said. "I didn't think I'd be learning that myself..."
"So, ya do like the story, Mr. Ricochet?"
"Yes, Droop-a-Long, I do." Clearing his throat, he added, "But even if it is good, I'm not that into the story like you and Denise are."
Droop-a-Long doubted that. He could see that Ricochet was nearly to the ending of the book, even though he'd had it for only a few hours yesterday. It was right then that a naughty idea came into his mind. He couldn't help but snicker, and Ricochet looked at him, his expression turning into a suspicious frown.
"What's on your mind, Deputy?" he asked.
"Oh, nothin' much, Mr. Ricochet," Droop-a-Long answered.
"Now, Droop-a-Long, you know I don't like it when you keep stuff from me," Ricochet said. "What are you hidin'?"
"I was jus' wonderin' if I should tell you about how the book ends, with Gwen and Ashton gettin' hitched off while Sebastian's left aaaalll alone. Oh, and Catherine ends up dyin' near the end of the book." Droop-a-Long turned around and sighed, shaking his head. "A mighty saddenin' ending, if I do say so myself."
He started to walk off, only to be yanked down to a sitting position. Droop-a-Long turned to face a very angry Ricochet, who had a fistful of his tail in his right hand. His face was as pink as his nose.
"WHAT?!" he yelled. "That can't be the endin', Droop-a-Long! Gwendolyn and Sebastian realized they were in love with each other, and right when they were about to confess their feelin's, that's when Catherine cut in and tried to make it look like Sebastian was havin' an affair! Poor Gwen ran off in tears to Ashton's house, and he tried to seduce her and all, but it didn't work 'cause she wised up to his tricks! So why the heck would she go back with him after she found out all the stuff he pulled so he could have her to 'imself?!"
Droop-a-Long was turning purple with his attempts to hold in his laughter. "I-I think ya need ta breathe, Mr. Ricochet..."
After taking a moment to calm down from his outburst, Ricochet said, "If that's the case, I'm never readin' to the end of the book. That...that's jus' wrong!"
"W-Well, Mr. Ricochet, it seems you were payin' attention to what happened in the story," he wheezed.
"And you weren't? How come you know that's the endin' for the book?"
"'Cause that ain't the real endin', Mr. Ricochet," Droop-a-Long answered.
Ricochet blanched, and Droop-a-Long couldn't hold in his laughter any longer. He started to laugh so hard that he had to hold his sides to keep from falling over. It took a second for Ricochet to realize just what Droop-a-Long had done, and his expression turned less stern.
"Very funny, Droop," he said, giving his deputy a mock glare. "That was mighty clever of you to do that."
Droop-a-Long regained control of himself to look at Ricochet, who had walked back over to his desk. "S-Sorry 'bout that, Mr. Ricochet. I-I was just havin' a little fun. Honestly, I didn't mean to make ya that mad," he said. "But I'm not gonna tell you how the book ends for real, since you're enjoyin' it so much."
"I told you, Droop, I ain't enjoyin' it that much," Ricochet replied curtly, putting the book aside to start the day's paperwork.
"Whatever you say, Mr. Ricochet. What I was tryin' to say earlier was that the shop was givin' out those carrot cake biscuits for free, so I got a big box of 'em to last you a week," Droop-a-Long said.
"Thanks, Droop," Ricochet said. "And...make sure you keep this between us, alright? The last thing I need are people startin' to wonder if I'm crazy."
"Alright, I won't tell," Droop-a-Long answered. "If anybody asks about the books, I'll jus' say you like readin' in your spare time."
Ricochet could hear the teasing tone in Droop-a-Long's voice, and turned towards his deputy with another frown. "Droop-a-Long..."
"O'course, I could jus' mention that he likes a specific type of books..."
He barely missed the book that came flying at him by an inch.
The End
I love writing a mischievous Droop-a-Long and an embarrassed/bristled Ricochet. And one wonders why I have Droop-a-Long listed as The Gadfly on my TV Tropes page.
I did have a modern day version in mind, where Ricochet ends up getting hooked on a soap opera that Droop-a-Long and Denise watch, but I thought the romance novel idea was funnier. In the cartoon, there are some inaccuracies (there weren't any TVs or cars, or much electricity in the West), so I had those reflected in this story, as well as some other chapters, in order to be faithful to the cartoon.
The novels were kind of inspired by British TV serials that adapted classic romance novels, such as "Wives and Daughters" and a couple of other shows I saw on Netflix. I thought it would be funny if Ricochet had another little guilty pleasure; personally, I think that his main guilty pleasure would be sugar, considering how much he loves those carrot cake biscuits.
And I figured that Felicia would write a romance novel, since she's rather feminine in general.
Not sure what I'll do for next short; if anybody has any ideas, feel free to tell me in your reviews! Constructive criticism is great as always!
God bless, iheartgod175
