Hey guys, I finally managed to post this chapter exactly a week after the previous, maybe I'll manage to continue. In the next chapter, you'll see the first appearance of a character of the next seasons, I personally like him, though not his beginning in the show and not in his first relationship.

Hope you still enjoy

XOXO

anne_black1437

Answers:

Pasty: thanks again honey to continue to read my fanfiction, what would I do without you? Kisses


Chapter 17

Waiting. The wait. Probably the most awful thing that could've existed. Now she understands what patients were feeling awaiting a diagnosis, without knowing whether they will live or not. Or what loved ones were feeling knowing if the person they care of will survive or not.

Helena was sitting in the waiting room for what it feels like hours now. After Anne had been taken to the OR about an hour ago, this young surgeon had taken Abby outside where the girl had cried the shit out of herself. When she had calm down, both took place in the waiting area in the open space, quickly joined by Anne's sister.

A mix of feelings was mushed up in the Shepherd girl's head. First of all, she felt powerless, knowing that her friend was lying on the operation table between life and death and that she couldn't help her. Somehow she was also really angry at herself first but also against the entire situation. It was so unfair, Anne was a marvelous person and a wonderful mother. She had already had enough tragic event beyond herself and had absolutely not deserved that.

"Lena, when can we see mommy?" a small voice asked next to her, interrupting her way of thinking.

She turned to face the girl who was sitting on the seat next to her, her huge teddy bear firmly tight in her small arms.

"Not now, honey," Helena said signing.

She threw a desperate glance in the direction of Mia. The young woman was fallen asleep on the seats on the other side of the waiting area. She wouldn't be of any help right now.

"See, the doctors are taking care of your mommy to try to make her feel better," she tried to explain so that Abby could understand it.

"But she will be better, won't she?" the little girl asked with her big eyes filled with hope.

"I hope so honey," Helena said sighing. "I hope so."


Izzie was waiting in the pit for Alex to arrive. She was as worried as one could be. About half an hour ago she had called her friend to have some updates over Rebecca's state and then, he abruptly hung off. After that, she sends her a quick text to tell her they were on the way to the hospital. And now Izzie was impatiently waiting, without knowing what had happened. She sighed deeply, stamping her feet impatiently. And suddenly, the automatic doors of the pit opened and Alex appeared, dragging Rebecca with him, the poor girl was covered in blood.

"What happened?" the blonde asked pressing trying to help her friend.

"I need betadine, saline, and a suture kit!" Alex shouted out in the pit.

"Alex! What happened?!" Izzie repeated louder.

"She cut herself," the man explained sitting Rebecca down on a bed. "It as an accident. I've got this."

"How much blood has she lost?" the blond continued focused on her job.

She took one of Rebecca's bloody arms and immediately noticing the bandage around the girl's wrists.

"Alex," she sighed.

"She's fine. I've got this," he threw pulling the curtain close angrily to cut her out.


After the bitter failure of the last intervention as part of the trial, leading to the death of Jeremy, their 12th patient, Meredith, and Derek went to announce the bad news to his girlfriend. The poor girl was devastated. But no nevertheless, Beth had decided that she still wanted the surgery, much to the dismay of her parents, but also of Derek who wasn't convinced of the possible outcome. For him, it wasn't safe to perform the surgery. Meredith, in contrast, tried to convince the parents that there were no other clinical trials and that no one else had any answers and that the surgery might be Beth's only option.

After that tumultuous discussion, the two surgeons walked straight out of the room, Derek seemed pretty angry.

"We'll get it right with Beth," Meredith tried to convince him.

"She just lost the love of her life. How could you encourage her to do the surgery?" he asked.

"How could you encourage her not to?" Meredith questioned.

"You know, it's not me with the big ego, it's you," he said letting the file he was holding fall down in the desk loudly.

"You backed me into a corner there. What was I supposed to do? To say no?"

"Derek!" the women protested.

"I can't. She's a kid."

"She's a kid who's gonna die without the surgery."

"She'll die with this surgery. That's what you and I do together. We kill things over and over and over again. We've killed 12 people, and now because of you, I will kill a 13th. When the surgery's over, we've done. I don't wanna work with you, I don't wanna see you, I don't wanna talk to you. We're done!"

And he grabbed his file, walking away without looking back, leaving Meredith alone and shocked.


Alex was taking care of Rebecca who hadn't said a word since he brought her in.

"This arm's almost bandaged, then we're gonna move to the other one, ok?" he said cutting into a piece of a bandage.

"Okay," she said weakly looking straight in front of her.

"I prescribed her Alprazolam and Clonazepam," Izzie said standing behind Alex sighing. "Psych will but down, but it'd be good to keep her calm until they get here."

"She doesn't need any drugs or any psych," Alex cut her in standing up.

"Actually, she needs a psych consult to be admitted," the blonde added.

"I'm not admitting her," Alex protest.

"You're not taking her home," Izzie warned him.

"I was watching her every minute 'till you called," he reproached her.

"You shouldn't have to watch her every minute. You're not on today so she was admitted under my name, which means I get to decide the treatment plan. She needs to be put on hold…"

"Damn it!" Alex shouted interrupting her. "Would you leave us alone you stupid bitch!"

And then he turned back to take care of Rebecca.


After the fight with Meredith, Derek had fled into the prep room to get ready for the intervention. He was far from being pleased with the situation he was brought into. He exhaled deeply.

"I think I liked it better when you were saying boring science stuff," Rose, who was standing behind him the entire time suddenly said.

Derek laughed softly.

"I'm never good enough," he mumbled. "No matter what I say or what I do. I never wanted to do this. This clinical trial is making me a failure. I failed her over and over and over."

"You mean "them"," Rose continued after a small silence.

"What?" Derek asked turning to her without understanding.

"When you say, "fail her" you mean, "fail them", right?" she asked with a pitiful look in the eyes. "The patients?"

Derek looked really sorry and lowered his glance to the ground.

"That's what I thought," the pretty nurse stated walking into the OR with tears in her eyes.


Shortly after that, Derek goes himself into the OR, Beth was already laying on the table.

"You don't have to do this, you know?" he said leaning down to the girl.

"Come on. What are you, scared?" she asked smirking as they injected her in the anesthetic.

"Yes," he admits.

"Me, too," she confessed losing her smile a little. "So let's just leap. Okay?"

A smile appeared behind Derek's mouth protection as he nodded.

The assistant then puts the oxygen mask over the girls face. She inhaled deeply.


A bit later, Mia had taken her little niece to get something to eat. Helena was still sitting in the waiting area with a coffee, tapping nervously with her feet on the ground.

"You're okay?"

Helena looked up surprised. A teenage girl with straight long brown hair and deep chocolate eyes. She looked nice.

"I'm sorry, my name is Lola," she said sitting down next to her and stretching her hand out.

"Helena," she said shaking the hand with a weak smile. "It's just that I am not really used to be on the other side. I am a surgeon in this hospital," she added seeing the girl didn't seem to understand. "Who are you waiting for?" she then asked.

"A friend of mine," the girl said lowering her head. "Something stupid happened."

She seemed pretty embarrassed, nearly ashamed.

"Tell me," Helena encouraged her.

"Lola, what're you doing," two boys who were sitting not far away called loudly. "Come, we're going!"

They were about the same age as the girl, though they didn't seem quite as affected as her.

"I'm sorry, they're my friends, I have to go," she said standing up.

Izzie came rushing into this room.

"Helena, I really, really, really need your help," she said letting herself fall down on the seat Lola had released.

"About what?" the Shepherd girl asked surprised.

"Alex," the blonde replied. "He brought Rebecca in."

"What?! But Why?"

"She tried to kill herself, and now he wants to take her home."

"But she needs to be admitted and she probably needs a psych consult too," Helena stated.

"That's what I told Alex, but he just won't listen to me," Izzie muttered desperately. "I don't know what to do."

"Look, she's your patient, right? He's… well, her loved one, he doesn't have anything to say. Do what you think is best for her, for her health."

"You're sure?"

"Yes, you're the doctor, you know your job, right?"

"Thank's, Helena, really."

"No problem."

As the blond walked away, Richard walked out of the restricted area, making Helena immediately jump up on her feet.

"How is she?" she asked worriedly.

"The first part of the procedure went without further complication, we discover some more metastatic tissue, but it was foreseeable," the elder doctor explained. "I'm directly heading back in to pursue the operation."

"What are her chances?" the black haired girl asked.

"You know I don't like to give false hopes, so you should get prepared to the worst happening soon," he said padding her shoulder. "I'm sorry Shepherd."

How was she gonna tell Mia and Abby?


Meredith and Rose were in the scan room, checking over some films.

"Are those Beth's films?" the nurse asked.

"Yes," Meredith nodded. "These are from two days ago and this one is from today. Would you hand me the calipers, please."

Rose quickly went to hand her the tool. Meredith put the calipers on the films, check the size of the tumor, comparing them both.

A bright smile appeared on her face.

"This one is smaller than that one," she said pointing on today's films. "Means the tumor is shrinking. The virus is working."

"Oh, my God," Rose laughed as the other one smiled proud and happy.

"You have to go and tell Derek," she added.

"No. You have to tell Derek," the pretty black haired girl replied with a weak but honest smile. "It's the kind of news he's want to hear from you."

And she walked away to the door.

"Rose," Meredith called to hold her.

"Congratulations on your major medical breakthrough, Dr. Grey," the nurse said holding the door. "It's the stuff of legends."

And she walked out of the room.


After that long and exhausting day, Mark and Callie were heading out of the hospital building.

"So you want to finish what we started yesterday?" the ortho surgeon asked her friend with a meaningful look.

"Or you can finish what you started," he added looking straight in front of them.

Erica was turning over her bag over a bench a few feets away, obviously looking for something.

"I'm growing," he added as she threw him a questioning look. Go, get her!"

And he walked back inside the building.


Helena was sitting on the playground watching Abby playing with some toy cars. Both seemed rather unstressed.

"Helena," Mia suddenly called.

The youngest Shepherd raised her eyes. Richard is standing there, his cap between his shaky hands. Helena stood slowly up, Abby tightly clinging to her legs….


Callie was starring with insistence at Erica. Her gaze wanders down to her lips. She slowly leans closed and puts her lips on hers…


George and Lexie were in their crappy apartment. George was happily announcing that he was retaking his intern test and she thanked Lexie a hundred times by pulling her closer pressing their lips together…


Alex is sitting on his bed at Meredith's, the eyes fill with tears. Izzie came in, telling him how sorry she is about Rebecca. Alex lean closer in an attempt to kiss her, he begged until she allows themselves a passionate kiss…


Derek was running into the trolley, their bottle of champagne in the hand.

"Meredith?" he called tearing the doorway open.

It was empty. He climbed out, disappointed until he noticed a lighting coming from a piece of land, their piece of land, right there where he had planned to build their house. He walked closer. Meredith was mumbling for herself surrounded by candles drawing the sketches of their house on the ground.

"Stupid, corny, idiotic. I cannot believe I did this. Stupid loser. Son of a… I could be home instead of…," she scoffs. "Stupid brain man!"

"Meredith," he interrupts her with the hint of a smile.

"Where have you been?" she shouted. "I've been waiting and waiting for you, and I did this stupid, embarrassing, humiliating, corny thing, and I was just gonna tell you that this over there is our kitchen, and this is our living room, and that's the room where our kids could play. I had this thing, "I wanna build a house", but I don't build houses. I am a surgeon. And now I am feeling like a lame-ass loser. I got all whole and healed, and you just don't show up. It's ruined because you took so long. And I couldn't even final that bottle of champagne."

With a bright smile, Derek pulled the said bottle out of his coat. He slowly stepped into the candle frame.

"The living room?" he asked. "Little small. I think the view is much better from here. And that's the room where the kids are gonna play?"

He chuckled.

"Where's our bedroom?" he questioned.

"I'm still mad at you, and I don't know if I trust you. I want to, but I don't know if I do, I'm just gonna try. I'm gonna try and trust you."

With each word, she took a step drawing nearer of Derek.

"I believe that we can be extraordinary together rather than ordinary apart, and I wanna be…"

She was suddenly interrupted by Derek softly pressing his lips against hers…


Mark entered the waiting area, in the hope to see Helena. He didn't see her since the whole thing with her friend Anne happened.

Since she was together with that man, James, he nearly hadn't seen her at all. He didn't saw her at first, but then he saw a shadow hidden behind a row of seats.

"Froggy?" he asked.

She looks up but didn't reply. Her face was devastated by tears. Her eyes were all puffy and red. He sat down next to her.

"She's dead Mark," she sobbed leaning her head against his shoulder. "Anne is dead."

"I'm sorry Helena," he replied squeezing her hand.

He never called her Helena until it was really serious, like that very moment.

"She died without knowing my decision," she cried out.

"What decision?" he asked unsurely. "About the whole thing about taking her girl in?"

She nodded.

"I decided to adopt her."

"We'll be here to help you, I promise. I'll be here to help you, you can count on that."


I personally don't like it when I read a fanfiction cause I'd like to imagine the OC by myself but here is the casting of the actors I would portray as my invented characters:

- Abigail Spencer (as a mid-twenty year old woman) as Helena Shepherd - BTW does anyone know the TV show Timeless?

- Mélanie Laurent (a marvelous French actress who plays in many American and British movies) as Anne Beckett

- Mackenzie Foy (as a five-year-old) as Abby Beckett

- Matt Lanter (also an actor from Timeless) as James Ford

Tell me what do you think, if you'd protrayed somebody else...