CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
"Stop staring so much. You look like a stalker."
Jacob scoffed at Embry's comment, his eyes fixed on the bathing suit-clad figure lounging on a towel only a few feet away from him.
He and his friends had spent the last few days at one of the many beaches in and near La Push, their summer break still in full swing and the weather kind enough to bless them with sunlight and mild warmth. It was too nice not to enjoy the outdoors, and with no looming threat of a bloodsucker—lone or army—life was quieter than it had been in months. The peace was strange, but the wolves quickly adapted, happy to spend time with their loved ones without any worries.
When the three boys weren't patrolling, they had their toes buried in the sand, Jacob itching to join his friends as they took up games of volleyball or wiped out on the waves whenever they attempted to surf. Though his body was now fully healed, he had to keep up the irritating façade that he was still injured – all thanks to Charlie Swan. The police officer spread the story of his supposed bike crash, meaning Jacob had to awkwardly move about in public with crutches he didn't even need. The only time he was able to discard them was when he was home or in his garage, so Embry and Quil often supplied the snacks as they joined him in watching TV, playing video games, or working on his car.
Despite the annoyances, life was good, but it would've been better if the girl he couldn't stop gazing at acknowledged his existence.
Zora had been home for a week, and in those seven days, hadn't said one word to him. He didn't see her as often—her mom made a deal with Sam that she would still patrol, but couldn't be out past 11 p.m. and made her get a summer job at the local grocery store—so it would've been nice to talk to her. But she was determined to make gaining her trust and friendship difficult, and he couldn't even bring himself to be upset about it. As Emily not-so-gently reminded him, she was protecting herself; after everything he'd subjected her to, she deserved to be wary of him.
Still, she loved him.
And now that he knew the truth, she didn't bother hiding the warmth emanating from even the simplest memories of him, the soft lilt of a voice humming Jacob, imprint, love in the depths of her mind. She loved him, but she was adamant about not letting her feelings blind her. She would not give into him easily and had no intention of excusing any of his wrongdoings. If he wanted any semblance of normalcy between them, he needed to work for it.
So he was determined to make things right because Leah's angry ultimatum made him realize that letting Zora go was the one thing he didn't want to do. For so long, he deluded himself into believing Bella was "the one," had wasted time in pursuing her even after she made it clear that she didn't want him. His wasted hope hurt him over and over again, but the pain was nothing compared to the ache he felt upon realizing that Zora could be lost to him because of him.
In her absence—which he hoped and prayed would be short and that she would return—he finally accepted the feelings he had been holding back, and though the process was difficult—not because he didn't like her, but because he liked her so much it made him physically ill to think of all the hurt he caused her—the fog occupying his mind and heart had cleared. He knew who he wanted, and though the clarity was elating, he was well aware he was not deserving of her. Not yet, at least.
"Now you look like a sad stalker," Quil teased.
"Shut up," Jacob grumbled. He was sitting in the sand, paying no attention as Quil and Embry tossed a football to each other.
"You could just walk over there and say hi," Embry suggested.
"Actually, he'll have to fake limp over there," Quil added, snickering.
"You're a real comedian, Ateara. And for both of your information, I can't just walk over. She…doesn't want to talk to me right now, so I'm respecting her choice."
"Ha!" Quil yelled. "Since when do you respect girls' choices?"
Jacob glared at him. "What are you talking about?"
"Oh, you know…chasing after Bella even though she made it clear she wanted the leech..."
Embry nodded. "He's got a point."
Jacob's face burned, his embarrassment rising thanks to his friend's words. Quil was right, of course. He'd made some terrible choices in his pursuit of Bella, including disregarding her assertion that Cullen was who she wanted. Add it to the list of desperate (and futile) things he did for "love."
He sighed. "I know - I was annoying and an ass, alright? I made some mistakes that I'm not proud of, but I'm turning a new leaf. That means being more respectful to women."
Embry and Quil stared at him with scrutiny before bursting into laughter. "Respectful to women, huh? I'm impressed," Embry stated. "I like this new accountable Jacob."
"Same," Quil said. "Now stop being a puss and go talk to her."
Jacob rolled his eyes. Had they not listened to a word he said? Zora made it clear she didn't want to speak to him, and he wasn't going to ignore her request and waltz over there like everything was fine. He quickly chanced a glance at her and—shit, she was staring right at him. His heart thumped frantically, the heat in his face rising as he looked away. He couldn't have expected her not to stare—she could literally hear everything they were saying—but she caught him off guard. Gazing into the darkness of her brown eyes ignited the pull between them, a light fluttering blooming in his stomach.
"Jake—wait…" Embry paused, "are you blushing?"
"No way," Quil said, his eyes wide. "He's totally blushing!"
"I am not blushing," Jacob growled, his face reddening further. "The sun is just making my face hot."
A snort came from Zora's direction, and though her eyes were closed and she was no longer staring at him, he noticed her wearing the smallest of smirks. She was enjoying listening to him make an ass of himself, and he was more than willing to let the humiliation continue if it turned that smirk into a full-fledged smile.
Stop staring, he told himself. It's creepy, and she probably thinks you're weird.
But more and more these days, he found it increasingly difficult to tear his gaze away from her. The copper brown of her skin was darker from all the time she'd been spending in the sun, more radiant and glowing. Her hair was longer, too, and though he knew she planned on cutting it soon, he liked the way some of it fell from the messy buns she often wore. He wanted to push those flyaway strands behind her ear, brush his thumb along her cheekbone and down to the cupid's bow of her lips, cup her chin between his thumb and forefinger and gently tilt her head upwards so that their eyes would meet, then he'd lean down, slowly filling the empty space between their lips—
"Ow!" he yelled, pulled from his trance as he rubbed the center of his forehead and glared at a giggling Quil. "Why'd you throw the football at my face?"
Embry chuckled. "You're doing it again."
"Doing what?"
"The thing where you get that weird, far-off look in your eyes because you're daydreaming about making out with Z—"
"Don't finish that sentence," Jacob warned, his voice low and ears red.
Embry shrugged his shoulders. "Fine…but we'll all see it later, anyway."
Jacob sighed and fell back into the sand, squinting as he stared up at the cloudless blue sky. Whichever Alpha ancestor came up with the idea to have us all share thoughts…you suck.
The vastness was calming, and though it momentarily emptied his mind, it was shrouded seconds later by thoughts of Zora. Maybe his friends were right; maybe he should go talk to her. It'd been days since they last spoke, so maybe she was less angry with him. And it didn't have to be some super elaborate conversation. He could just say hi and walk away. There was no harm in a simple hello, right?
Wait a minute, he thought, grimacing. What if she ignores me like last time? God, that'll be so embarrassing. Or what if it makes her more pissed at me? She for sure won't talk to me then. Okay…maybe I shouldn't go over th—
"Need any sunblock?"
Jacob's tumultuous thoughts halted abruptly as a male voice came from Zora's direction. He sat upright, brow pulled into a frown and jaw clenched as his eyes zeroed in on the broad, bare back of a long-haired guy. As much as he would've liked to be her sole admirer, he knew that wasn't the case. He'd caught plenty of guys gawking at her the past few days, and though it usually only took a straight-faced glower from him to make them look away, the one grinning down at her wasn't intimidated so easily.
"I can't stand that Allen guy," Embry said. "Thinks he's hot shit 'cause he goes to UW."
"I mean, it is a pretty good school," Quil mused, correcting himself upon receiving a glare from both Jacob and Embry. "But yeah, fuck that dude."
Though Jacob appreciated his friends' solidarity, it did nothing to quell his steadily-rising irritation. He knew Allen, not only because they attended the same high school, but because he had built quite the reputation for himself. His status as an older, "bad-boy" college student earned him the attention of many girls in La Push, and though he came back in the summer months to visit his family, he remained pretty busy during his stay.
And unfortunately, Zora was at the top of the list of girls he wanted to get busy with.
"Let's see what lame attempt he tries today," Embry snickered.
Quil laughed along with him, but Jacob didn't find the older boy's antics comedic. Allen approached Zora often, and though Leah was usually there to get rid of him with a blunt "fuck off," she hadn't accompanied Zora to the beach today.
While his first instinct was to march over and block him from even looking at her, Zora proved time and time again that she didn't need anyone's protection. After seeing her fight with the newborn—which both unsettled him and strengthened the adoration he felt towards her—Jacob knew that she was more than capable of taking care of herself. But he wanted to protect her, whether it was from a rogue bloodsucker or a creepy, persistent college dude. He didn't want to push any boundaries by stepping in, though. So as much as it irked him to watch her be ogled like a piece of meat, he would let her handle it.
She stared up at Allen with disinterest. "No thanks. I've got my own."
"You sure?" Allen pressed, his eyes traveling down to stare at her chest. "I'd be more than happy to get those hard-to-reach places."
Hell no.
Jacob was up and moving before he realized it, his fists tight and trembling as one mantra echoed in his thoughts: I'm gonna kick that guy's ass. He heard the frantic voices of his friends telling him to come back, but they were whispers against the chaotic noise in his mind. He'd reached Zora and Allen in a few powerful strides, his hand slamming down on the latter's shoulder. Jacob gripped him roughly, pulling him backwards and nearly growling into his ear.
"I believe she said no thanks," he spoke through his teeth. "Take a hint and get lost."
He could hear the acceleration of Allen's heart, and though it beat faster in what Jacob knew was nervousness, his expression didn't betray him. He sized up Jacob, whose stature was taller, wider, and overall, more powerful – but he didn't budge.
"This your boyfriend or something?"
She quirked an eyebrow. "No, he's not."
Both boys reacted, one frowning and the other grinning until she continued, "But he is right. I already said no, and I don't plan on saying it again. Stop bothering me."
Their expressions had switched, and now Jacob was grinning at the aggravated look Allen wore. It only lasted a second, however, as the cool mask he wore slipped back onto his face. He shook Jacob's hand off his shoulder, scowling at him for a moment before turning to Zora with another smirk.
"Fine. I'll see you around."
No, you won't, Jacob wanted to say, but refrained from speaking, choosing instead to see him off with a triumphant, gloating smile. He was happy once Allen's profile disappeared from view, but his grin fell as he met Zora's amused stare.
Immediately, he was reduced to a flustered, stammering mess. "I…I—uh…it sounded like…uh…you needed some…help?"
She shook her head. "I can handle him. Thanks, though."
"Sure, sure," he murmured, rubbing the back of his neck. "You're…uh…welcome." He turned around, his face red and blazing when she called out his name.
"Jacob?"
He whipped around desperately. "Yes?"
She smiled, and his heart soared. "I think you blew your cover."
"Oh," he said, crestfallen. Those weren't the words I was expecting.
She continued smiling and motioned to something behind him. He gave a heavy sigh, turning around to look in the direction of where she was pointing. In the distance, Quil and Embry were watching him and laughing, each holding one of his crutches high in the air.
"Great," he muttered. "Sam's gonna be pissed."
He turned back around to give her a weak wave, stopping short when he saw that her grin had also turned into laughter, her hand over her mouth in attempt to shield it from him. He trudged back to his friends, his head bowed and his eyes cast downward.
I guess I'll just go die of embarrassment now.
(Revised 4/14/2021)
AN: Lol, dramatic. I hope y'all enjoyed this chapter! But if not, that's okay, too. I felt like it was time for Jacob to do the pining and daydreaming and getting nervous around Zora. And honestly, it was fun writing from his POV. We'll see how their relationship continues to develop now that he's over Bella.
As always, reviews, constructive criticism, favorites, and follows are greatly appreciated! I really love hearing from all of you. :-) Also, stay safe out there! These times are crazy and kind of scary, so please try and make time for rest and relaxation, especially if you're stuck at home the next few weeks.
