I apologise for being away for so long - I was on holiday in the UK meeting my extended family for the first time which felt very emotional at times. I've been back for a while but found it hard to write which is why it's been so long. If you're still interested enough in my story to be reading this now, then I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I hope I can keep the updates rolling out from this point on.
The waiter at the restaurant guided Shion to the table her father had reserved for the evening, where the man himself sat next to her stepmother. His hair seemed to be flecked with more grey than the last time she'd seen him. Her stepmother regarded her coldly as Shion took a seat opposite them. She wondered how long it would be before the subject of her injury was brought up.
"Shion."
"Otou-san." She was painfully conscious of the glare of her stepmother trained on her and she tried her best to avoid looking in the older woman's direction.
"How have you been?" she asked.
"I think it's best we don't drag this out," he said, bringing his clasped hands to rest on the table.
"What is it?" Shion found herself flicking through every worst case scenario she could think of. Her father was looking more tired - surely he couldn't be sick? Had something happened to the company he worked with? They hadn't gone bankrupt, had they?
"We will be moving overseas - I have been transferred to the branch in America."
Her jaw dropped. "You're kidding." She was still confused as to whether 'we' included herself or not. The last thing she wanted to do was move to America when it felt like she'd finally found some friends.
"Your stepmother and I leave tomorrow."
"For how long?"
"It's hard to say, but it will probably be for at least a couple of years."
"Oh." Shion swallowed, not wanting her disappointment to show. She didn't know any of her extended family. Her father was an only child and his parents had passed away when she was a toddler, and to the best of her knowledge, her mother had been disowned after choosing to pursue music as a career. She hadn't seen or heard from her stepmother's family since the wedding and it didn't seem like that was going to change anytime soon. If her father went to America, she'd be alone.
"What's with that face? Aren't you happy for your father?" Her stepmother's words were icy as she spoke up for the first time.
"Of course." Shion mumbled.
"It's a shame that we had to sell our new apartment so soon but I'm sure America will have lovely accommodation as well."
Oh. That reminded her.
"What about my furniture, Otou-san?" she asked him. "I've been using a futon until you could get it delivered. Where is it?"
"It wasn't your furniture," her stepmother said. "You were just using it. Once we found out about the transfer we sold everything unnecessary. Including the furniture that was in storage."
So in short, she had nothing. There was nothing left. Shion bit her lip hard, not wanting to give her stepmother the satisfaction of knowing she was upset.
"I guess I'll just have to buy some more then." she said stiffly. "Hachi might be able to get me a discount at the furniture store she works at."
"Don't trouble your housemates with such things." Her father said. "If you've been working hard at your job then you are more than capable of providing for yourself."
The man in front of her was cold and grey. It was hard to think that this man had once cheered her on at school talent competitions or come to every violin recital until he'd remarried. They would play imagine games when she was younger around the house, games where he'd leap around and roar and pretend to be a dragon while as a music knight she slayed him with the power of her violin.
This man was emotionless. This man didn't care about her anymore.
This wasn't her father. A stray tear fell down her cheek and she wiped it away before dragging herself to her feet again, her ankle throbbing.
"I'll go. I need to catch the last bus before it leaves. Enjoy America."
As she turned her back she heard her stepmother whisper to her father.
"Such a rude child."
•─────⋅雨⋅─────•
Shion took a deep breath and knocked on the door.
"Come in~!" Hachi called cheerfully. Thankfully she was still awake even though it was approaching midnight. Shion had come home a couple hours earlier, going over the family meeting until her head felt as though it was going to explode. There seemed to be one solution for her.
No more family - at least not the family related to her by blood. She was done. If they were happy taking off to America with the money meant to send her to university than so be it. But the future that she did head towards wouldn't include them. That ship had sailed.
She slipped inside Hachi's room which was illuminated by a bedside lamp. Hachi had been sitting cross-legged on her bed, flicking through a magazine which she put to the side when she saw Shion.
"Shion! What's up?" Hachi smiled at her warmly.
"I was just wondering if you'd maybe… help me with something?"
Immediately Hachi's eyes lit up. "Sure! What is it?"
She gathered her ponytail in one hand and revealed the scissors she'd been holding in the other. "Would you help me cut this? I know I should go to the salon but I really can't afford it right now."
Hachi wasted no time in jumping up and ushering her towards her dressing table mirror.
"How short do you want it?"
"I guess… off my shoulders." Hachi raised her eyebrows. "Are you sure? That's a lot."
As it was, her hair reached just below the halfway mark of her back. It was a big change, but Shion felt as though it would be a change for the good. A reminder that she could take drastic action when necessary, as stupid as that might sound.
"Yeah, I'm sure."
As Hachi got to work, the conversation moved on to BLAST.
"They're really coming together now." Hachi said dreamily.
"Nana-san seems to be happy with Nobu's songs."
"She is!" Hachi said. "Even though she might not shower him with praise, I can tell Nana is happy to do music with Nobu again. I hope they find a drummer soon."
The haircut was almost finished when Hachi asked the thing Shion had been hoping she wouldn't.
"How was dinner with your family?"
"Oh… it was fine. They just wanted to check in." She hoped her stomach would refrain from betraying her hunger for the time-being. She'd already caused so much drama with her ankle and her anxiety, the last thing she wanted to do was put the focus on herself again.
"How are things with you and Shoji?" Hopefully Hachi wouldn't notice she was trying to change the subject. Thankfully the other girl was happy to talk about her boyfriend.
"Well… I don't see him nearly as much as I'd like to but~ we've~ got~ a date soon~" Hachi sang, snipping away at the stray hairs she'd missed. "That just about does it! What do you think?"
Beneath their feet was a mass of black hair, like something you'd find in a horror movie.
"My head feels so light." Shion said, running her hands through her hair and watching her reflection. She was right in thinking it was a big change - she looked good, and maybe even like someone who was capable and independent. Surely she'd be able to manage in Japan by herself. She'd make sure of it.
"Super cute~!" Hachi squealed. "Maybe I should get a job at a hair salon!"
"I'm pretty sure you need to go to school first for the qualification." Shion told her, but then she gave her housemate a small smile. "Thank you, Hachi."
"No problem!"
•─────⋅雨⋅─────•
It was Thursday morning when Hachi came skipping through the front door clutching the post in one hand with a smile. Usually most of it was addressed to Hachi - she had so many friends and family concerned about her living in Tokyo it made Shion jealous at times. This time however Hachi pushed an envelope towards her as she was chomping down her last piece of toast.
"For me?" Shion asked, spraying crumbs everywhere before she was able to swallow and mutter her apologies. Hachi nodded, "Who do you think it's from? Your father?"
Shion wiped her mouth before picking up the envelope, "I doubt it. He's in-" Then she stopped herself before she could reveal the subject of the family dinner the previous night.
She didn't recognise the elegant handwriting at all - just that it wasn't her father's. It was strange; aside from her father and Andou-san the realtor, no one else knew where she lived.
Unable to hold back her curiosity any longer she tore it open and a small post-it note fell out, as well as a creamy parchment letter; neatly folded. As her eyes scanned the note first, her heart soon stopped.
Shion. I should have given this to you much earlier but I didn't have the courage. I know that you are disappointed in me; I am far from the father you deserve. I'm not just going to America on business. I am sick Shion, and I did not have the courage to tell you face to face. My doctor recommended I take the necessary treatment that is available only in America, and it will be years before I can travel back to Japan if the surgery is successful. I'll miss you, my daughter, but I know that you will find your own path because you are your mother's daughter.
She couldn't believe what she was hearing? Her father, sick? With what? She read the note over and over again hoping that perhaps the answer might still be amongst words she had skipped over in her haste, but no such answer was written.
There was still the letter to be read but Shion wasn't sure if she could handle two huge bombshells in such a short amount of time. Whatever could this letter be?
The parchment was smooth beneath her fingers as she pressed out the creases and began to read.
My lovely Shion,
It's hard to imagine that by the time you read this you'll be all grown up when as I write this you're in my tummy. You've given me no problems at all; you're such a gentle thing. I was expecting you to be kicking up a fuss in there but you've been very quiet. I wonder what you're like now? I can't wait to see you grow up into a lovely young woman.
I wanted to pass on motherly advice but to be honest I don't know if I'd really be one to talk - I feel like such a disaster at times! Why did your father marry me? I think about it a lot, but I'm so happy that he did because now we have you! I was so happy when the doctor told me I was pregnant - your father and I both cried.
My own mother and father disowned me when I decided to pursue the violin as a career, but I want you to know that no matter what you decide to do with your life, I will support you 100%. There is nothing I want more than for you to live happily. Marry the one you love if you'd like, or don't get married and that's also okay. Do the things that you want to do, the path that leads to the place you want to go (and if you'd like to learn to play the violin along the way I wouldn't complain).
The violin is the sound of my heart, but as I have been fond of saying these days, you are my heart, lovely Shion. I just know that when you're born our family will be so perfect.
I'll see you soon little one,
With love,
Okaa-san.
Shion tucked the letter back inside the envelope and hurried out the door, her bag in tow. Her mind was reeling with emotion and she felt very sure if she didn't distract herself she would almost definitely cry. Nobu would be there soon to take her to work again; the last thing she wanted to do was worry him again.
Still, a letter from her mother? It was so filled with warmth and love that Shion could almost imagine her mother's voice for the first time. How lucky she had been to have such an accepting woman as her mother; if only fate hadn't decreed they never meet.
•─────⋅雨⋅─────•
