Shion arrived at the studio an hour before the others, hoping that playing the violin would take her mind of the dilemma she had found herself in. It hadn't been going very well. Her mind was reeling with the discovery of Shouji's tryst and she didn't have the ability to block it out. Instead, it was like her mind was on high alert, blaring loudly that she needed to figure something out.
But to tell Hachi… it would break her heart. And it wasn't as if anyone knew that she knew. No one would blame her for keeping quiet. No one except herself. She slumped into a chair, resting her violin on her knees with a sigh. She wondered what she would want if their positions were reversed and Hachi had discovered Shion's partner was cheating on her. Would she want Hachi to tell her? How would she feel if Hachi knew but didn't tell her? It wasn't quite as easy to imagine as she hoped. She had no idea what romantic love felt like, or how much a betrayal like that would hurt. But the answer was there in her heart, and no matter how uncomfortable it made her, she needed to do it. She needed to tell Hachi.
"We're here~~!" Ten minutes later Hachi bounded into the room, followed by Nana, Nobu, Shin, and finally Yasu. Shion bolted up, almost forgetting about the instrument on her knees and catching it before it tumbled to the ground.
"You're all here!" She bit her lip. Was it better to tell her before or after practice? Hachi was humming under her breath, watching reverently as Nana and the others set up their gear. Yasu seated himself at the drumset, and caught Shion's gaze.
"Is something wrong, Shion-chan?" Everyone in the room turned to look at her and she froze.
"Um… well, uh… no? I'm just… really looking forward to hearing you today!" They smiled and went back to setting up. Hachi looped arms with her, eyes shining.
"Ne, ne, Shion-chan! Have you thought about joining BLAST yet?"
"Well actually, uh…" She took a deep breath. Calm down Shion. You need to act normally or else everyone will realise that there really is something wrong. "It's not like I absolutely don't want to join." she said. "It's just, I'm still sorting through what my plans were for my music career if I'd entered university."
"Is classical music really that fun?"
Shion smiled. "Rather than fun… it's more like a different way of breathing. It can be calming or powerful, or sorrowful, or joyful - sometimes all in one piece. When I play, I feel alive… and I feel connected to my mother. I don't really have any experience comparing how that feels to playing with BLAST."
Hachi nodded sympathetically, but someone tapped on Shion's shoulder.
"Maybe you should play with us today and get an idea." Nana grinned, holding her hand out to the younger girl. Shion stared at it, hesitant but Nana continued to make her case.
"You're a talented musician, Shion. Take a leap of faith with us, even if it's just for tonight."
Well, they'd probably forget all about her participation after she revealed her news to Hachi. Maybe it would be okay if it was just the one time. There was no way she could get attached if it was just one session.
"Okay."
•─────⋅雨⋅─────•
Nana positioned her next to Nobu on his guitar, winking as she took her place by the microphone.
"I know we don't have an official violin part yet," she said. "But you figured out how to transcribe our song by ear, so I think you'll be fine to improvise. Don't freak out over the specifics - your job is just to have fun, 'kay?" She nodded, readying her violin on her shoulder. Nana nodded to Nobu and the music began.
When I was darkness at that time fueteru kuchibiru
Heya no katasumi de I cry
Mogakeba mogaku hodo tsukisasaru kono kizu
Yaburareta yakusoku hurt me
When I was darkness at that time, with trembling lips
I cry in the corner of my room
The more I struggle, the more these wounds pierce into me
Our broken promises hurt me
Nobody can save me
Kamisama hitotsu dake
Tomete saku you na my love
God, I have one request
Stop tearing apart my love
I need your love
I'm a broken rose
Maichiru no kanashimi your song
Ibasho nai kodoku na my life
You song is fluttering sadness
I have nowhere to go, my lonely life
I need your love
I'm a broken rose.
Oh baby, help me from frozen pain
With your smile, your eyes,
And sing just for me
I wanna need your love...
I'm a broken rose
I wanna need your love…
Shion lost herself in the wonderful, brashness of rock; violin singing alongside Nobu's guitar, Shin's bass, Yasu's drums, and Nana's voice. It was so different to playing classical music alone - she could feel the hearts of everyone playing with her, their souls combining to create something magical. Never in a million years had she imagined playing in a band would feel like this. For the first time in her life she felt... powerful.
She played her last notes with an abruptly stopped tremolo, her bow raised high, and the breath she had held in somewhere during the song came bursting out of her. She barely had time to regain control before Nana threw her arms around her, ruffling her hair.
"I knew you could do it! I knew it! That was awesome, Shion!"
Her energy was infectious and the smile on Shion's face went from ear to ear. "I loved that!"
Nana hugged her more tightly, carefully avoiding crushing the violin. "I knew you would. What did the rest of you think?" She aimed the question at her bandmates and Hachi, all of whom seemed to share her enthusiasm.
"You've got to join BLAST now Shion-chan!" Hachi enthused. "You all belong together - I can feel it."
"You're truly talented." Yasu said. "I was surprised the sound of your violin blended in as well as it did."
"If she joins, imagine all the guys who'll be tripping over themselves to see her play." Shin said, smirking when Shion squeaked in response. Surely, he was joking? But as much as she respected the opinion of those four, there was one person she hadn't heard speak yet. She turned to him now.
"Nobu? What did you think?"
His face was neutral and for a moment she was scared that he'd hated it after all. Instead he ruffled her hair too and gave her a thumbs up. "I was all for you joining BLAST even before I heard you play with us. But now there's no question about it - you belong with us." Shion smiled shyly. The five of them watched her expectantly and time seemed to slow. It felt strange to think she'd been so hesitant about her decision before, when now even after playing just one song, her heart ached to play another with these people.
"I… would love that. If you'd have me."
Nana punched the air triumphantly. "Yes~! Hell yes!"
Nobu grinned. "Then you're one of us now. Welcome to BLAST - the best band in Japan!" Her heart felt full for the first time in her life. She was going to faint from happiness if this kept up. She would never trade the memory of this day for anything.
•─────⋅雨⋅─────•
They returned to apartment 707 to celebrate BLAST's newest band member - an affair that had them drinking until early morning. Shion had her fair share of fun listening to Nobu and Nana butt heads over stories from their high school, and Hachi's melodic laughter ringing over top of the chaos. Eventually Nana turned her attention to the one member of their party who had abstained from drinking alcohol thus far.
"Oi Shion~" she whined, scooching closer to where she sat next to Shion. "Why don't you just have a little sip of my beer, It won't kill you, I promise."
"I'll have to pass, sorry Nana." she said. "It smells so bad I couldn't even think about actually drinking the stuff."
"It's not that bad, honest~" Nana said, holding her beer can towards Shion. "Just one sip. Please~~~~? Do it for me~~~!" Shion stared at the can. It wasn't without temptation. The smell was truly vulgar, but she'd watched her friends drink like this for a while now, and part of her envied how much fun they seemed to have while tipsy.
"A sip." she said. Nana's face lit up and she felt everyone stare at her in disbelief. "And only because I've already stepped out of my comfort zone today anyway." She gingerly picked up the can which was almost empty and brought it to her lips, nose wrinkling when the smell hit her.
She knocked it back, cringing as the harsh taste of alcohol burned her throat. Her face must have seemed strange because her audience began to laugh, not unkindly.
"So?" Nana wanted to know, nudging her with her elbow. "Not bad, right?"
"It's disgusting." Shion said. "Seriously."
The other woman just laughed. "It's an acquired taste. Don't force yourself though."
"I wasn't planning on it." Shion accepted the glass of water that Hachi brought her instead, and Nana cracked open another beer can, raising it high.
"To our newest band member! BLAST is now back and better than ever!"
•─────⋅雨⋅─────•
The next week passed in a blur and suddenly May had arrived. Shion's schedule mostly consisted now of work and band practice, as well as individual practice sessions. BLAST had been blessed with a 30 minute performance slot at an event scheduled at the Shimokita Concert Room on the 5th. Because of her place in BLAST she had stopped hiring a practice room on the days when the band didn't have practice, and focused instead on making violin parts for all of the songs in BLAST's repertoire ready for the day. Nobu had been invaluable in this process - he was a truly talented composer with an ear for these things. After work when they had shifts together, they'd disappear into a nearby cafe to work on adding violin to the old songs, as well as creating completely new ones. Nobu had ideas that would test Shion's limits and she loved discussing how creative they could be with the violin sounds.
He was her best friend.
But she still had a problem to contend with. One that she should have told Hachi a week ago. With all the excitement of her joining the band, Shion hadn't yet told Hachi about Shouji and she had a bad feeling that she was running out of time. I'll tell her tonight after dinner, she decided. Her roommates had decided to have a nice home cooked dinner that evening, just the three of them. It wasn't the best time to bring up what she'd heard at the restaurant last week, but when was the right time to tell your friend her boyfriend was being unfaithful?
That evening she helped Hachi prepare the batter for making takoyaki, while Nana sat at the table behind them, eyes closed, humming under her breath.
"I think I might surprise Shouji after work tomorrow." Hachi said, beginning to whisk the batter. "It feels like I've barely seen him since I moved to Tokyo." She batted her eyelashes at Shion and Nana.
"You two will come with me to the restaurant, won't you~?"
Nana groaned. "Nope."
"Nana~ Please!" Hachi rounded on Shion. "How about you Shion? Will you wait for him with me?"
If I tell you what I know tonight, you probably won't want to wait for him anyway. Shion bit her lip. The subject she had been dreading had come up earlier than she had expected.
"Uh… well… about that…"
Hachi leaned in closer, pouting. "Please~~? It's getting so dark at night these days! And we can get something to eat there too."
"Yes but... " Shion took a deep breath. "I… I have to tell you something, Hachi."
The older girl looked curious and must have noticed Shion's anxiety because she put the bowl of batter aside and smiled kindly. "What is it? You can tell me anything."
Your boyfriend is cheating on you. That was all she had to say. How would Hachi react? She'd probably cry, or say that she had to be mistaken and go tomorrow night anyway to 'prove it wasn't true'. No matter what she said, Hachi was probably in for a harsh breakup.
"I was… at the restaurant last week and…"
Hachi encouraged her with another smile. "Take all the time you need."
"I think I heard something… I wasn't supposed to hear. About Shouji."
Instead of the grim look Shion had expected, Hachi's face lit up. "About Shouji? Really? Was he talking about me?" Just as Shion went to reply, the other girl jumped in again. "Something you weren't supposed to hear? Surely that doesn't mean… no way!" Hachi was beaming. "Don't tell me he was talking about the future!? His future with me!?"
Shion went quiet and that was when Nana stepped in. More perceptive than Hachi, she seemed to have guessed that whatever Shion wanted to say was nowhere near as optimistic as Hachi thought it was going to be.
"Sit down Hachiko." she said. "Let Shion finish before you get carried away."
Hachi did so, pouting. Shion sat opposite her, next to Nana. "It's just… I heard him, and it was definitely him. One of the waitresses was crying I think, because some customers had harassed her. I think he was checking on her when I overheard everything."
"My Shouji is so kind~!" Hachi said dreamily.
"What did you hear, Shion-chan?" Nana said.
"He asked if she was okay and when she said she was… he said he was angry that she was touched… by… by…!"
Nana put a hand over her own. "By what?"
"By someone other than him." Shion whispered. "Hachi… I'm so sorry. I should have told you sooner…! I didn't know what to do… how to say it…" She dared to lift her gaze to Hachi. The other girl wasn't moving and she had a strange expression on her face. And then she just smiled, although it wasn't as strong as before.
"You must have been mistaken, Shion-chan. Shouji isn't that kind of guy."
"But-"
"You'll see. Come with me when I see him at the restaurant tomorrow. We'll get everything straightened out. You don't need to look so worried - I'm sure this is just a big misunderstanding."
"Maybe."
"Looks like I'll be tagging along after all." Nana said. "Someone needs to keep you two out of trouble. And if it is true, I want the pleasure of punching him myself."
•─────⋅雨⋅─────•
Shouji was tending the register when their group of four arrived at the restaurant. Shin had also tagged along, although they hadn't filled him in on the underlying purpose of their trip yet. Hachi was still adamant that Shouji would never cheat on her and for her sake, Shion hoped she had just misunderstood the conversation she had overheard.
"Shouji!" Hachi's face lit up when she saw him. "Here we are! Sorry to come without any notice."
Shouji seemed speechless when Hachi quickly pushed Shin and Shion towards him.
"Good to meet you." Shin said, a charming smile on his face. "I'm Shin, the bass player."
"Nishimura Shion desu." Shion mumbled, bowing her head. "We met a while ago. I play the violin for the band."
Shouji collected himself and greeted them both. Nana got straight to business.
"Hachiko's the only one who really wanted to see you. We came purposely for you, so can you give us some food?"
"Err… well I can get you a table." he said at last. Hachi perked up, her eyes shining. Shion saw Shouji look warily towards the booths by the window, where a female waitress was serving customers before looking away quickly. Was that the girl?
"Over here please!" he said, flustered.
"No, I'd prefer to be over by the window." Hachi said, already heading towards an empty booth with Nana. The two of them had already begun discussing what to have for dinner, and Nana seemed set on the idea that Shouji would be paying.
Shouji disappeared as they were getting seated and Hachi quickly scanned the restaurant for him.
"He's probably gone to get some water." Nana told her. "Calm down and stay seated."
"You're boyfriend is classy, Nana-san." Shin said. "His uniform suits him."
Hachi beamed. "Yeah? But when he speaks, he just sounds dumb."
CRASH! The sound of glass shattering on the floor made them all turn their heads to see the same female waitress staring at the mess in shock. Another waitress soon came over to chastise her, and hurried off to bring something to clean it up. The offending waitress continued to pick up the mess with her hands, gasping in pain when the shards sliced through her finger.
To their surprise, Hachi was on her feet first, offering her handkerchief to the waitress.
"Oh," the waitress said. "This handkerchief. You shouldn't have."
Hachi began to wrap it gently around the girl's finger. "I'm giving it to you, don't worry!" As she continued to fuss around the waitress, Shion felt a tug on her elbow.
"Hey Shion-chan. Is that…?"
Shion nodded and Nana's grip tightened. "Hachi will be devastated."
A few moments later, Hachi rejoined them. The mood settled somewhat after their food had been served and they got lost in conversation.
"In the end, eating when you have a mouth piercing isn't easy." Shin said, taking another bite.
Hachi sighed. "Every time I saw you I thought it seemed like you had another piercing, and now you've even got one on your mouth. You had such a pretty face - it'll probably be a problem when you kiss." Nana laughed at that comment, but Shin took it in his stride.
"No, it's been alright." The three girls stared at him in shock.
"Who did you kiss?" Nana wanted to know. "Nobu?"
"Huh? Nobu's gay? I thought he had a thing for Shion" Shin said.
"That's not-" Shion began, but Nana had already taken over.
"No," Nana said. "But I thought you were." she pointed at Shin, still watching him suspiciously. The boy just blinked.
"I'm straight."
"Ne, Shin," Hachi said. "Do you plan to keep staying at Nobu's place? You look a little thin."
"I only crash at his place occasionally, you know." Shin told them.
"Then where do you live?"
"At a woman's house. A different one each time."
Shion choked, and the other two seemed to be feeling the same way, their shocked faces begging for an elaboration.
"I'm only fifteen, and it's difficult for someone as fragile as me to find a job." he said. "But I understood that living thatway I'd never have money problems. It'd be easy to survive in this world."
"You're a born idiot!" Nana raged. "One day you'll be killed by a woman."
"An idiot?" Shin mused. They didn't have time to explore the subject further because they were interrupted.
"Nana?"
"Oh Shouji! Where were you hiding?"
"Did you plan on doing something after this?" Shouji asked.
"No. Starting from tomorrow I've got four days off so I'll wait until you're done."
"You don't need to wait for me." Shouji had a serious expression on his face, and it must have reminded Hachi of what Shion had said because her face was strange again. "Can I come to your house after my job?" he asked. "We need to talk."
•─────⋅雨⋅─────•
Shion, Hachi, and Nana sat outside the restaurant, waiting for Shouji to finish his shift. Shin had left them to meet a female client, so it was up to Shion and Nana to support Hachi. She'd been quiet compared to her usual lively chatter. The air was chilly and Nana had thrown her leather jacket over Hachi, who snuggled into it.
"He had such a serious expression." she murmured. "After what Shion told me… I'm so worried that if I went back home, it'd torment me. Sorry to have forced you both to stay with me."
Shion reached for her friend's hand and squeezed it. "We're here for you. Always."
"Thank you, Shion-chan." Nana was humming again, and it filled the silence but couldn't disguise the tension in the air. They were waiting for the inevitable.
"Sachiko!" The first thing they saw was a slim shadow running out from the restaurant. Shion recognised the waitress who Hachi had helped, and she soon recognised the figure that chased after her only to pull her close in an embrace. She felt Hachi tense up beside her as the scene unfolded before them. And then Shouji and the girl noticed their audience for the first time, their expressions both filled with guilt.
Nana spoke first. "Shouji. What the hell are you doing? Who's this girl?"
Shouji sighed. "My girlfriend."
"What?!" Nana glared at him. "Idiot. You have two girlfriends then. Such a good life. So you were right after all, Shion." Shion felt Shouji's eyes slide to look at her in surprise.
"You knew? So you came here…?"
"Because Hachi didn't think you'd actually do it." Nana said. "She was prepared to give you the benefit of the doubt. But no, you're a scumbag after all." Stood between her two friends, tears began to fall down Hachi's cheeks. Nana scuffed her cigarette, lunging forward, fist intent on Shouji's face. Shion's heart raced as things escalated.
"STOP!" The other girl named Sachiko screamed, clinging onto Nana's arm so that she couldn't hit him. "Don't hurt Shouji!"
"Leave it, Sachiko!" Shouji pleaded. "Don't butt in."
"It's got nothing to do with you!" Nana said furiously. "Don't you dare come in between. I won't be alright if I don't break his face."
"It's you that has nothing to do with it!" Sachiko told her. "If you feel like hitting someone, then hit me! I was the one who fell in love with him! Even if I knew he had a girlfriend, it was too strong - nothing could stop me. I won't run away or hide anymore, so hit me until you feel satisfied!" She was trembling, but the small girl stood her ground, shielding Shouji from harm.
Nana cracked her knuckles. "That's very brave."
"No, please!" Shouij begged. Nana ignored him and focused back on Hachi.
"Hachiko!" she yelled. "Why aren't you doing anything? It's your battle - you have to lead it!"
Shion was still holding Hachi's hand, but the girl's fingers were limp. Tears still flooded her eyes in her state of shock. She was transfixed on Shouji, who held Sachiko protectively.
"If you don't fight, you'll lose!" Nana said. "Isn't he your boyfriend? Get him back!"
"I don't want him." Hachi murmured, looking away. "I… don't even want to see his face anymore." Shion watched as Shouji looked away, shamefully. The situation wrapped up quickly after that. There was nothing more to be said. They lead Hachi away, Shion holding one hand, Nana holding the other. Hachi quietly sobbed, and no one said anything. When they got home, Nana pushed Hachi into her bed, ready to hold her through the night. Hachi got lonely easily.
Even from her own room, Shion heard the sobbing continue through the night.
•─────⋅雨⋅─────•
