The Coffee Marine
"Goddamn…" Kane muttered to himself.
"What?" Fisher asked while cleaning his new Dahl machine gun.
"How the hell did things get so bad out here?"
"You mean how some psycho-bitch can amass thousands of crazier psychos or a corporation can invade another corporation?"
"Both." Kane kept his eyes on the road, "I mean, we managed to colonize six full galaxies and yet ended up letting corporations and cults run amok?"
"Would it have been better if governments were still running the show?"
Kane sighed, "Not really. Yet we fought to make sure they did, ours at least. Can't imagine how you felt about the whole thing."
"I feel better knowing the people that killed her are gone."
"You sure about that?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean you don't have to dwell on revenge anymore." Kane looked to Fisher, "This is a new century, a new galaxy."
"A chance to start over?" He looked up at the hellish sky, "Not exactly what I had in mind."
"Okay…well, at least…you got a new mission that has nothing to do with the old days."
"Find this Great Vault, stop the Calypsos, or liberate the entire Borderlands?" Fisher's eyes decided to enjoy the scenery, not that there was much of it, "The first I can get behind. The latter two…not so optimistic."
Kane shrugged off Fisher's comment, "Well, we have to try. You know we can't just sit around and let them seize this supposed godhood they speak about."
"Gonna be a little hard when they got Siren powers while we just found out we've got more abilities than just having glowing tattoos."
Kane said with confident assurance, "We'll cross that bridge when we come to it. But when we do, we'll make sure the Calypsos answer for their crimes."
"You know the Raiders will just strap'em to a wall loaded with two tons of Semtex, get a camera bot, and blow their insides sky high for all the Borderlands to see."
"…We'll cross that bridge…when we come to it."
Kane needed something to take his mind off this particular subject. Luckily for him, Lorelei was there to provide.
"Good news, guys!" They spoke to the Outsiders via ECHO, "My guys managed to rescue a ton of civilians from the Neon Arterial! They brought'em to the command center."
"Awesome!" Kane was happy to hear the good news.
Lorelei hesitated, "Well, there's bit of a problem. We're low on supplies. This command center wasn't meant to sustain this many people."
Fisher asked, "What kind of supplies we talkin? Medical, food, water?"
"Much more essential." They said, "Coffee."
Kane and Fisher exchanged looks before getting back to Lorelei.
"Coffee?" Kane asked with confusion
"Would some soda do instead?"
"No, trust me, mate. We really need coffee to get us through this!" They really insisted, "At least I do!"
"…No."
"No!? Don't fucking joke around, ya wankers! If I'm gonna get through this shit, I need some fucking coffee right now!"
"Alright, alright, fine!" Kane finally relented, "We'll get you all some coffee! Will any coffee shop do?"
"There's a Rise and Grind not too far from you. Just sent coordinates to your ECHO! Please, hurry!"
"Huh. Now we're running errands." Kane complained, "Well, we better get them coffee then."
"Awesome." Fisher cocked his new Dahl machine gun, "You can drop me off over there."
Fisher pointed to a small plaza to the right of them. The plaza in question was currently occupied by the tomfoolery of a platoon of Maliwan troops trying to kill time since there were no Atlas soldiers in sight.
Kane did a double-take, "What?"
"I'm gonna go lend Atlas a hand as much as I don't trust corporations."
With a hesitant mind, Kane parked the buggy next to the sidewalk. Grabbing his machine gun, Fisher climbed out of the vehicle and cocked his looted weapon.
"You know this means I gotta get some coffee in the middle of a warzone, right?" Kane complained to his friend.
"Exactly." Fisher retorted, "Have fun."
"ALONE." He raised his voice as Fisher made his way into the plaza, showing no concern about the fact he was going alone. Seeing as he wasn't gonna assist him in this assignment, Kane had no choice but to drive off and continue, "Asshole."
Well, he was all alone. Alone to complete an errand instead of doing what he did best. Using the coordinates Lorelei sent him to his ECHO, Kane drove his way through town to this "Rise and Grind". As he passed by the various gunfights happening all around the area, he took a series of deep breaths and kept telling himself he's helping the survivors out. His grip on the steering wheel tightened as he did this.
Eventually, Kane made it to his destination. Seeing the name glittered in neon lights on a towering sign, Kane parked the buggy in front of the Rise and Grind. Jumping off the vehicle, keeping his assault rifle handy, the cyan-visored marine slowly walked toward the building. He quickly made note of the lack of human life present in the area. Lorelei reminded him over the ECHO that the place was deserted a while ago. Kane joked internally that at least the people and Lorelei themself were smart enough to not go crazy for coffee during a violent invasion. However, upon arrival at the lonely counter, he found out that the area wasn't completely devoid of life. What had materialized out of thin air was a single legless robot. The machine made up for its lack of legs by having a small rocket engine below his body, allowing him to hover.
"Oh, hey." The machine greeted the only human present in a chill tone of voice, "What can I do to, like, help you? Or whatever?"
As he made his way toward him, Kane quickly aimed his rifle at it once he saw the cannon on the robot's left arm. Watching Kane from one of the cameras, Lorelei chuckled from seeing the Marine respond like he was about to enter a gunfight.
"Relax, mate. It's the Barista Bot."
Lowering his weapon, Kane sheepishly approached the Barista Bot from the other side of the counter.
"Hello, erm…Barista Bot." Kane briefly turned his head to check for any Maliwan, "I need um…"
"Arcturian Superblack." Lorelei whispered over the ECHO.
"Arcturian Superblack."
The Bot responded, "Ohhh, can't do it. Power core just blew out and, like, I can't do the coffee thing without the power thing."
Kane asked, "Oh...okay. Where would you find another power core? Do you have a spare back there?"
"Oh, so, like, the power core I was using just then was the spare core."
Shit. Kane thought to himself.
Over the ECHO, Kane could hear Lorelei swear up a Venusian storm, "OF COURSE! It's okay. It's ooookay. Right, so there's a Maliwan Heavy nearby, calls himself "Core Daddy" like a real arsehole. Bloke's got a power core built right into his suit. That'll get'im up and running!"
Turning back to the buggy, Kane sighed as he ran back to it, "Send it to my ECHO."
Let's do this. Kane thought as he sighed. Stepping aboard the buggy, Kane took off from the Rise and Grind to find a new power core for the Barista robot. The White Knight, as Tyreen likes to call him, was happy he didn't have to go far. It took three turns and a small drive down a particular street to track this "Core Daddy" to a small shanty town in the outskirts of the city. Upon stopping in the middle of the street, Kane found the area to be occupied by both Maliwan and COV. Despite getting out, his presence was not yet made known despite his unique armor.
When he saw a COV cultist and Maliwan soldier converse with one another, Kane decided to do a little reconnaissance and took cover behind a metal Maliwan crate.
"Umm…" The Maliwan trooper expressed hesitance to speak at first, "So…Ryan. How are…you right now?"
"I am good, Maliwan man!" The cultist spoke like a typical Pandora bandit, "I feel blessed!"
"…Blessed?"
"Yes!" He exclaimed, "By the Twin Gods! The Calypsos have shown me and my clan the true path!"
"What, you believe they saved you or something?"
"Yes, Maliwan slave! They have saved me! They've saved many more across the Borderlands! And they can save you too! They've in fact saved my loved ones!"
Save you…right. Kane remarked in his mind.
"Yeah, I'll pass, pal." Said the trooper.
Across the Borderlands... Kane thought with dread in his eyes. Cross that bridge...when we come to it...
Rifle at the ready, Kane's first target was the bandit. One bullet was enough to put him down, also make his presence known to everyone in the area.
"What the f – " The Maliwan man the bandit was talking to jumped back immediately, "It's him! It's that Outsider!"
Just hearing the single word Outsider sent signals down the spines of every bandit and mercenary around. Word travels fast amongst the people of the Borderlands, especially news of strangely-armored men mysteriously appearing out of nowhere gaining Siren abilities after trying to take on a couple of ECHO stars face-to-face.
One Maliwan commando issued orders over the ECHO, "Stop him! Protect that asshole Core Daddy!"
"I heard that, jackass!" Said a guy over the radio, presumably the man that Lorelei talked about.
Kane opened fire on the Maliwan guy, taking him down quickly. Once they knew he was in the area, all the Maliwan operatives got into position right away, taking cover behind every object they could find. The COV on the other hand, started charging toward the so-called heretic. Maliwan watched in contempt as many of their fundamentalist allies got gunned down by the Outsider by his lonesome. Their contempt briefly faded once they witnessed one manage to get in very close proximity to Kane. Core Daddy, the Maliwan commander, smiled with sadistic glee from the safety of a rusty house's rooftop as he watched the COV cultist wrestle Kane for his assault rifle, but that glee went away as well once Kane landed a punch onto the cultist.
KER-PLUSH! The cultist's head exploded as Kane's fist traveled through his skull, forging a red mist in the air, painting any surface in its path such as Kane's armor. Hit by a moment of surprise, Kane had to stop for a very brief second to collect himself. Maliwan stood in shock and horror as Kane took the time to wipe off the remnants of the cultist's skull that splattered itself onto his visor. One made a visual note of how his arms displayed a weird, cyan glow from his armor, but they couldn't tell at first if it was coming from his actual arms or the armor itself. Many still had yet to be informed of what went down between the Outsiders and the Calypsos a few hours ago.
"Damnit!" Kane shouted at himself.
Once he wiped off enough of the bandit's remains off his visor, Kane was back at work. With a chilled spine and trembled voice, Core Daddy ordered his men to attack the Outsider with all they got. They got to shooting right away, but not before taking cover from the rooftops of the shanty town and opening fire from there. The ones stationed on the ground used their jetpacks to get to the highest point possible to get a safe shot at him from there. Kane took cover from the ground right away. Not a single round went through him thanks to the erratic aim of the mercenaries. Taking cover behind a corner, he caught a quick glimpse of a flight of rusted stairs leading up top. Taking advantage of Maliwan's sudden unconventional aim, Kane made a run for it and took the stairs, making it up to the rooftops.
"HE'S HERE!" One immediately pointed at the oncoming Outsider, "HE'S ON THE FUCKING ROOF!"
"That I am." Kane remarked as he put two rounds into a Maliwan soldier's chest.
Maliwan's panic overrode their judgement. All of them tried to open fire as soon as they saw him. CLICK! Each one of their weapons made when they pulled their triggers. If only they recalled the part of their training that told them not to go full-auto otherwise their aim would be all over the place, and since they'd have to reload ten seconds later, they'd give their enemy time to shoot them first, which is what Kane did the moment he heard all the clicks. Some attempted to pull out their sidearm, but he was too fast. The only one who managed put a bullet in Kane was Core Daddy himself, who also had a sidearm and was able to respond better than his subordinates. However, two bullets did not stop the growing impatience of the charging Outsider, most definitely not the fists that popped his chest open with two hits.
With no time to waste on such an errand, Kane snatched up the big glowing power core Core Daddy kept on his back. As his eyes set straight down at the buggy, a single Maliwan trooper caught Kane's eye. Kane's eyes widened when he saw the man wield a hefty-looking rocket launcher from his shoulder. Soon as he fired a rocket, Kane dashed toward the end of the rooftop. Without thinking, Kane jumped off with the power core in hand, seconds before the merc's second rocket hit the building.
Falling three stories down, Kane landed hard on the ground. The impact from a well-built Marine who just gained Siren-ish powers generated a small shockwave, pushing away several piles of trash and debris and a single Maliwan corpse a few clicks away. With heavy breaths, Kane finally looked around then down at himself after making such a landing with barely any scratches or broken bones, and the various bloodstains and remnants of Core Daddy's viscera didn't count. Even then, he didn't try to take in his current experiences for long. He ran back to the buggy and took off back to the Rise and Grind. The whole drive, he didn't bother to tell Lorelei about what he did at the shanty town. He just had to keep focusing on the mission.
Going at full speed thanks to the buggy's thrusters, Kane made it back to the coffee shop in just a few minutes. Stopping the vehicle in its tracks as soon as he was in front of the place, Kane jumped out and over the counter. Looking around, he found a panel next to the doorway leading inside. Ignoring the Barista Bot, and not reading any instructions, not that there were any laying around, Kane took the power core and inserted it inside the panel where he thought it might connect. After putting it in, the core lit up, unleashing a few sparks of electricity that should've left Kane a human-shaped piece of charred meat but was entirely unaffected by the sparks that hit him.
"Cool, cool, very cool." Said the Barista Bot, "Now hit the bell. That should reboot the shop or whatever."
Noticing a single bell on the counter, Kane jumped over on the other side and hit it.
"Okay…lay it on me." Kane side glanced at the street to check for any Maliwan.
The Barista Bot approached Kane from the other side, "Oh, man, no can do."
"What? Why not?"
"Oh, so we're, like, an eco-friendly shop, you know? So, you'll have to, like, supply your own supply cup."
"You gotta be fucking kidding me." Kane finally had enough, "Does this giant metropolis look eco-friendly to you? There's a fucking shanty town three blocks away! Exactly how many trees were cut down to manufacture you and a bunch of other Barista Bots?"
"Wow, dude!" The Barista Bot reacted, "Like, take a chill pill, man!"
Out of the blue, a single Maliwan heavy and a squad of soldiers arrived at the Rise and Grind via their jetpacks. Turning around, Kane's eyesight was overtaken by the arrival of a single Maliwan heavy in brown armor and a squad of soldiers.
"I'm gonna need more than that." Kane sighed as he tightened his grip on his rifle.
"Outsider!" The brown-armored Maliwan heavy called Kane by his new nickname, "The Calypsos speak of you!"
"I'm sure they have plenty to say about me." Kane joked.
"You killed Core Daddy at the shanty town!" He said bombastically, "He was my friend, and lover! Now I have no one!" He aimed a big-ass weapon at Kane, "Time to die!"
Kane said to himself quietly hoping Lorelei couldn't hear, "Is everyone in the Borderlands this dramatic?"
As soon as the first shot was squeezed by one of the Maliwan soldiers, Kane immediately jumped over the counter.
"Get down!" The Marine grabbed the Barista Bot and brought him to the ground.
Once he ensured the Barista Bot's safety, Kane got to work on the latest bother. Using the counter as cover, Kane attempted to pick off the new wave of Maliwan. The first time he rose up, Kane was able to score two kills at the cost of taking two bullets in the same shoulder, neither of which managed to put him down, but sure hurt like hell.
"Shit!" Kane grunted as he endured a rush of stinging pain.
The Outsider had to take a moment in cover to take in the pain, which he had time to do thanks to the wave of lead and plasma coming his way. Once the wave lightened a little bit, Kane got up from cover again to kill some more Maliwan. In doing so, he was able to stop another, only to take a blast of orange plasma to his helmet, this time knocking him down.
"Woah." The Barista Bot saw Kane get hit, "You, like, okay man?"
Kane tried not to growl as he picked up his rifle, "No. Not really. Time for Plan B though."
At this point, Kane was done. This entire mission was just a fucking pointless errand. He felt he should've been somewhere else in the city alongside Wilkes, Fisher, and Grimm liberating the city from Maliwan.
With no other option in mind, Kane decided to do something stupid in that moment. Standing before the squad of Maliwan, Kane made a leap for it over the counter. The eyes of Maliwan and the Barista Bot widened up as they stared up in awe of Kane, who soared sky high in the air from doing just a normal jump from the ground. Even Kane was surprised by this sudden feat. Eventually, Kane landed on the street, creating a similar shockwave to the one he made when he jumped off the that rooftop a few minutes ago, this time more powerful. The force generated from the impact sent the rest of the normal Maliwan soldiers away in the air, knocking them out as soon as they hit the ground. All the impact done to the commander was push him back a couple inches, barely making a dent.
"You're…" The commander hesitated to speak, "You're gonna have to better than – "
Tired of the bullshit errand, Daniel Kane ran up to the Maliwan Commander, jumped just a little over his head, and rammed his fist into a circular, glowing device strapped to his back. Kane had no idea what doing that would do, but he knew it would involve stopping him from hurting any more innocent people. BOOM! His assumptions were correct. The Commander's entire body exploded into a giant red mist, sending chunks of blood, bone, and viscera all over the street. Some even got on the counter, much to the dismay of the Barista Bot, who was in the middle of cleaning it up while Kane was busy defending the place.
As his boots landed on the ground, Kane proceeded to walk back to the Rise and Grind. But before he did, one of his boots stumbled into something laying about on the street. Stopping, Kane looked down to see a single coffee cup rolling about away from him. Grabbing it just in time, Kane inspected the inside of the cup, checking to see if anything was inside. When he discovered it was empty, he turned back to the Barista Bot and decided "screw it" and use that as the cup to give to Lorelei.
Walking up to the Barista Bot, Kane planted the coffee cup on the counter.
"Will this suffice?" Kane asked the robot with deep breaths.
"Yeah. That'll do."
To the joy of Kane, the Barista Bot proceeded to fill up the coffee cup with his coffee cannon. After it got filled to the brim, Kane quickly shut the cup tightly using the lid and rushed back to the buggy. With no incentive to say bye to the Barista Bot, Kane hastily drove back to the Command Center to give Lorelei what they craved so desperately the whole mission.
Arriving back at the Command Center, Kane wasted no time in getting inside. Spotting them, which was easy since he had yet to meet anyone else with teal hair aside from screaming COV psychos, Kane rushed up to them coffee in hand.
"Here ya go." He happily presented Lorelei a cup of Arcturian Superblack.
Desperate to high hell for some goddamn coffee, Lorelei snatched the cup from Kane's hand. They barely had time to thank the Marine before taking a massive gulp.
"You're…welcome?" Kane at least got some amusement from seeing someone so visually desperate for coffee.
"Ahhhhh…" Lorelei finally had a chance to speak after consuming a whole ounce of Arcturian Superblack, "Much better…Thank you so much. What was your name again?"
"Daniel Kane." The cyan-visored Marine looked around the Command Center only to see the place still occupied by Lorelei and the drugged out COV, "Um…where're the civilians?"
"Civilians?"
"Uh, the civilians you said managed to find shelter here?"
"Oh – right. About that…" Lorelei took a huge sip of coffee, "I may have – not been entirely honest with you. Some civilians did manage to find shelter, but…somewhere else."
Despite having to undergo some serious frustrations out there, Kane let out a chuckle, "Really needed coffee that bad, eh?"
"Well, yeah." Said Lorelei, "Don't you?"
"Let's just say I've learned to physically last longer without provisions than the average man."
"I take it you want some reward for all you hard – "
"None needed." Kane said very rapidly out of the blue, interrupting Lorelei, "Robert Fisher's all yours. Excuse me!"
Before Lorelei had any time to respond as Kane ran back to the buggy to finally do some real Marine work. The Outsider did not want to get hampered any further with any more mundane errands.
"Hope Landon, Fisher, and Grimm are kicking ass..."
