Part 3. Exploited in the Bowels of Hell
(Bladehenge, The following morning)
(Eddie's point of view)
The following morning, I got up, had breakfast and followed Lars up to the north gate. As me and Lars, leading his big raptor elk mount passed through the gateway, we came across this glowing purple statue.
"Most unusual." Lars said, looking at the statue. "I've lived here all these years and I've never seen it glow like that."
"What is it?" I asked.
"We call them tab slabs." Lars answered. "They're ancient relics left behind by the Titans. Until recently this one's been just sitting there. But now..."
"Lemme guess, It started glowin' in that weird purple light." I finished.
"Exactly, Edward. I wonder..." He looked back at me.
"You think my showin' up might have something to do with it?" I asked.
"It's possible." Lars answered.
"Let's find out then." I approached the glowing tab slab. Just as I was right in front of it, I suddenly hear this awesome sounding guitar riff. A fanged chrome skull emerged and set itself on top of the slab, steel spikes came out the sides, And a set of glowing musical notes appeared on the front.
I read the notes. "Ho ho ho, This one looks like a doozy!"
"A doozy?" Lars asked, looking confused. "What do you mean?"
"Something awesome, Lars. Something awesome." I studied the notes and read the glowing note beneath 'em.
...Summon Deuce…
… This powerful riff summons the Deuce…
...Better than valet parking…
"I cant wait to try that out." I said.
Well seeing as my car's on the other side of Bladehenge, I unstrapped Clementine and played that riff hitting the notes perfectly. The instant I struck the last note, the Druid Plow suddenly appeared in front of us in a flash of lightning. Woah.
It took us several minutes afterwards to catch and calm down Lars' suddenly spooked steed.
"Guess I oughta be more careful doing that around him." I said as we came back to my car.
"That would be a good idea." Lars mounted the raptor elk while I packed the Separator and Clementine in the rumble seat and got in and started up my car. "Now follow me… YAH! YAH!" He snapped the reins, dug his heels into the flanks and took off at full gallop.
I was barely able to keep up. Man that elk was fast.
I drove past what looked like some kind of glowing green geyser. I swore I could almost hear something coming from way down inside that thing. I continued to follow Lars north. I'll worry about those weird geysers later.
I caught up to Lars when he stopped by this large half buried statue surrounded by those devil thorns.
"This the entrance to the mines?' I asked.
"Not quite, Edward." Lars shook his head. "That's still further north, past the remains of an ancient highway. I just noticed the devil thorns growing around it. I wonder..."
"If I could raise it like I did with the Druid Plow back in the Coiled Remains." I finished. "Guess it might be a Titan relic. Well one way to find out." I took Clementine out of the rumble seat while Lars held the reins to keep his mount from bolting. I played the relic raiser solo…
Best as I can describe it, what rose up once I finished resembled a garage shaped like an engine block. Even had a fanged skull wearing an aviator hat and goggles above the door. "Wow, now that's my kind of relic."
Then we heard a voice coming from that skull. "Ye who have raised this sacred garage, drive the sacred car ye have constructed into thine entrance way. Come alone." If I didn't know any better I swore it sounded like Ozzy Osbourne. Come to think of it, that dude that sold me the wood to repair Clementine a while back also sounded like him too…
"The Guardian Of Metal." Lars gasped.
"The who now?" I asked.
"The Guardian Of Metal." Lars repeated. "A person chosen long ago by the Metal Gods to be their keeper of ancient secrets long lost to the world above. And he has summoned you to come and see him."
"He wants to see me?"
"Yes, Edward." Lard nodded. "And you would do well to heed his summons. And do so alone. I will wait outside until you return… If you return."
Why don't I like the sound of that.
Well I suddenly have a strong feeling that I should go in. So I got in the Druid Plow. "Be right back, Lars." And drove in as the door opened…
(The Motor Forge)
I zoomed down this long dark tunnel lit by all these weird, and cool looking orange runes. Soon the tunnel ended in a really large cavern lit by sea of lava beneath. I saw these giant dudes hammering away on massive anvils.
I brought the Druid Plow to a screeching stop as the path came to an end and got out to survey my surroundings. That's then I heard this maniacal laughter echoing throughout the cavern…
"HA HA HA HA HA HA! HA HA HA HA HA! HA HA HA HA HA!"
Then a stream of lava shot up and landed right in front of me. It exploded revealing this dude in a black fringed robe with a glowing cross on the back. He turns around, pulling down his hood to reveal…
"Well, It's about fucking time."
Ozzy Osbourne? Only somewhat younger looking, and wearing red Lennon specs.
Next thing I knew, he was examining the Druid Plow. "Not bad." He checked on the engine block. "Looks like you figured out the instructions okay. You got some demon flesh on your bumper." he pointed at the front bumper. Then went around to the back of the car. "But that's the way the world is today, I'm afraid."
"So who, uh..." I tried to ask.
"Oh me?" 'Ozzy' replied as he continued to examine my car. "Oh I'm nobody special. Just the Guardian Of Metal. But you can call me Oswald."
"Oh wow, Great." I replied. "That's the same name as..."
"As Ozzy Osbourne?" Oswald replied. "Yeah, I do kinda look and talk like that old dude from Earth. Or was it the other way around." He scratched his chin. "Good singer that one. Might have been an influence on him way back during his 'Black Sabbath' days."
"You've been to Earth?" I asked.
"I've been to many worlds in the last few hundred years, son." Oswald tapped on the tires.
"You see, I've been chosen by the Metal Gods to be the guardian of their secrets and artifacts millennia ago." He checked his face in the mirror. "I can travel between dimensions. Lately I've been derping about the galaxy looking for worthy people."
"Worthy People?" I said.
"Pretty much." Oswald replied as he got in the car and fiddled with the controls. "You might have met one of 'em. I sold a pin to her when I dropped by Terca Lumireis some six of your years ago. Dark brown hair, blue eyes, glasses, cute looking broad, if a bit hoity-toity."
"Julia?"
"Bingo." Oswald grinned. "If you're wondering what happened to her since you got here, she's doing fine. I think she's heading up to some city inside a cave to study to become some sort of scholar."
"So how many 'worthy' ones have you found?" I asked.
"A few..." Oswald answered. "And soon their time will come and many tales of their heroism will be told throughout the galaxy. But that'll be another set of stories for another day… Third gear's a bit sticky by the way."
"So you want to help me fight demons and stuff?" I asked.
"Hmmmm, lemme think on that..." Oswald got out of the car and walked behind me. "Naaah. I'm not a fighter. As I mentioned earlier I'm more of a, what shall we say, a keeper of timeless secrets and what-not, that's all.
Then he puts his left hand on my shoulder and pointed at me. "Tell you what; Prove yourself worthy, and maybe, I'll share some of them secrets and what-not with you."
He walked towards the edge of the cliff. "For instance, did you know that this world was once ruled by an ancient race of Titans?" Not really, news to me.
He continued. "Now they were something!" He smiled back, then he looked upwards. "They took every part of that old fire beast. They took his blood, his fire, his steel flesh..."
Then we walked around behind me. "They even took his scream. And they made that car there..." He pointed at the Druid Plow. "And a million other things." He spread his arms out.
Then he put his arm around my shoulder. "Including music. Fuckin' beautiful music, man."
He walked back towards the edge. "And when they rose to the heavens and became Gods, they left instructions behind. How to make cars, music, the whole deal." He spread his arms out.
"Do you think anyone noticed?" He turned around to face me. "Pffft. Nah. Bunch of wankers!" He flipped the middle finger. "No one here figured out any of it! Not the humans that came to settle this place! Not the Tainted Coil, that's for sure! Not until Riggnarok and, more recently, you, Eddie."
Riggnarok?
He scratched his chin. "So, as I suspected when I sold you that wood to fix your guitar, you're definitely worthy of the Metal Gods favor, I suppose."
"So it was you I met at that lumber yard in Panem." I pointed at him.
"Figured that out, huh?" Oswald grinned. "Too bad Sharon made me shave off the beard afterwords." He stroked his chin. "Thought I looked good in it. Oh well." He approached. "So listen, if you do something that pleases the Gods, they might reward you. With a fire tribute. Ha ha ha ha." Then he pulled out and lit…
Is that MY cigarette lighter!?
He tossed it back to me. "When they've paid you enough tributes, come see me: I'll share some more secrets of metal with you."
He looked at the car. "Like how to turn that little beast over there into a real monster. One that would make a Group B rally-car look like a pedal-powered go-cart. Among other things. Got it?"
"Um, sure." I replied.
"Good. I can sense that that the Metal Gods have already blessed you with some awesome combat moves." Oswald commented as he looked me over. "And I'm guessin' it's well before we met. Have you used any?"
"I think I used the Rock Kick." I replied, scratching my goatee. "In Berlin on some masked motherfuckin' piece of shit(AKA the Rapeman). Just learned it's name when I was chopping up those druid dudes."
"I see. So how's your guitar working?"
I took both Clementine and the Separator outta the rumble seat.
"Even better than ever." I showed him Clementine and let him take it. "And now she can cast lightning, set dudes on fire, and even cause earthquakes. Does that have anything to do with that wood you sold me?"
"You could say that, Eddie." Oswald replied as he examined Clementine.
"The ebony and cherry wood did come from such trees. Only these trees are native to this world and were cultivated by the Titans to allow those who are worthy to channel their awesome power." He strummed the strings, causing lightning to strike a nearby pillar.
Then he performs the earthshaker, making the whole chamber shake and rumble. Some of the falling boulders bounced off those giant dudes, which led to them angrily shaking their fists at Oswald and shouting words I can't quite understand, but something tells me they're not nice words. Can't really blame 'em.
"Sorry, guys!" Oswald apologized back. "Testing out a new guitar!" Then he turned to face me. "Really good work on her, by the way. Perfectly tuned too." He handed her back to me.
Then he noticed my axe leaning up against the Druid Plow. "Well I see you managed to get your hands on the old Separator." He picked it up and examined it. "Been quite a few centuries since I last saw this beauty. The Gods'll be pleased that it's now back in human hands once more."
Then he pulls something silvery looking out of his robes. "Here catch." And tossed it to me. Looks like some kind of radio.
"What's this?" I asked.
"Just a little something for your car." Oswald replied. "You, no doubt noticed, that rectangular hole in your dashboard. It's on the house."
...The Mouth Of Metal…
… For returning the sacred to the place of its creation, the Titans have awarded you with the Mouth Of Metal…
...Now the song of the Titans will follow you wherever you go…
It didn't take too long to install the new radio.
"Well it looks like I've kept you here long enough." Oswald said as I started up my car. "Don't you have anything else to do? Like, oh say, Help Lars spring all those dudes from the mines and get your little army started?"
"Yeah, can't keep him waiting." I replied. "Oh wait, before I scram, what do I have to do for a fire tribute?" I asked.
"Please the fuckin' Gods of Metal, man! Figure it out!" Oswald answered.
"Right. Okay, I'll be back soon, covered in Metal God love." I waved back.
I think what I just said came out wrong. That because Oswald grimaced, looking a bit revulsed. "*shudder*Oh, God!"
"Fire tributes! I meant fire tributes!" I corrected. "What did you think I was gonna come back covered in their jizz? Yeeech!"
"Yeah, that's what it it sounded like to me. YUCK!" Oswald shook his head like he was trying to banish the thought of me showing up all slimy and stuff like he said YUCK!. "No go on! Off with you!"
Well no point sticking around, so I drove back up the passageway and returned to the surface…
(The Surface, Motor Forge Entrance)
I met up with Lars as soon as I exited the Motor Forge. "So you have returned from the Motor Forge." Lars said as I got out. "So what gifts has the Guardian Of Metal bestowed?"
"Well I got this new radio for starters." I pointed at the Mouth Of Metal.
"A new radio?" Lars asked as I switched it on…
First song we heard was 'Leather Rebel' by Judas Priest. Something tells me that these Metal God dudes visited Earth back in the '60s and introduced Heavy Metal.
Lars looked awestruck. "The music of the Titans! Or something similar."
"Where I come from that's what we call Heavy Metal." I replied.
"We had music like that here long ago." Lars said. "Back when the Titans walked these lands. It seems that when they ascended to become the Metal Gods, they must have visited your world at one point."
"I think so too, Lars." I nodded. "Your stag seem to like it." I thumbed over to Lars's mount, who was nodding his head in tune to the song on the radio. And looking like he was enjoying it.
"Interesting." Lars stroked his chin. "Was there anything else before we resume our trek to the mines?"
I explained to Lars some of the things I learned from my visit with Oswald.
"I see. Well we should be off." He mounted the raptor elk, snapped the reins and took off north. I got in to my Druid Plow and followed…
Definitely gonna need an engine upgrade that's for sure.
We passed under an ancient highway overpass and continued onwards. Eventually we came to a stop at two stone pillars forming a gateway to a path leading down into a large open pit mine. Next to 'em was a sign that said 'Crushing Pit'.
"Is there something in my teeth?" Lars asked as he dismounted. I followed him up to a ledge overlooking the mine.
"So this is it." I folded my arms and looked downwards. "The Crushing Pit."
"Yes." Lars nodded.
"Hundreds of our strongest young men, toiling their lives away, like their fathers and grandfathers before them."
We watched the laborers on the scaffolds hacking away at the rock face with pickaxes and hammers.
"Given simple tools, and forced to break the solid rock-face with nothing more than pickaxes and sledgehammers. They enter the pits at age 10… Very few live long enough to produce the next generation of laborers, let alone retire." Lars shook his head.
"Well come on! Let's bust 'em outta here!" I declared, Smacking my fist to my palm. "Where's the gate?"
"There is no gate." Lars shook his head.
"What!?" I asked.
Lars explained. "Ever since the Black Tear Rebellion, their spirits were broken. They have nowhere to go. No idea how to live outside the pits. So they stay underground." He let out a ragged sigh, slumping his shoulders.
"I wish I could help them, But I mean, what do you do with a bunch of people who don't know how do do anything but chip away at the rock all day long?"
I felt my lower lip quiver as I looked down at those poor saps. Then I looked back at Lars, and gave him my answer. "You start a revolution, Lars… RIGHT NOW! C'mon! Let's get down there!" After getting my axe and guitar, we ran down through the gate and down into the pit…
(The Crushing Pit)
When we arrived at the first pit, we heard this constant monotonous singing that was mixing in with the din of the pickaxes, sledgehammers and shovels.
"One day more...One day more...One day more...One day more...One day more...One day more...One day more..."
Also the scaffolds that those dudes were standing on were made from…
Car frames!?
Not to mention there were car parts and engine blocks sticking in the walls. Are they mining cars here!?
Me and Lars approached the nearest group of laborers.
"Hey, dudes, knock it off for a second!" I shouted. "Your mining days are over. We're busting you outta here!"
They just ignore me and continue their work.
Then we heard one of those statues talk. "When it comes to mental health, the safety word is work." I'm guessin that the voice of that Lionwhyte dude. "PERSONAL GOALS!"
"Dudes. Come on!" I tried to get their attention. "I'm talking about freedom here, liberation! Maybe a little sweet revenge."
They kept on working." You're not even locked up! The shackles are all in your minds, mam! This is sad, bro-mans! You don't have to be slaves!"
Hey, you two! Beat it!" A voice interrupted. We turned to see these two dudes approaching us. They looked like the miners we were trying to free, only they wore suits that had oversized collars and lapels, Van-Halen style striped pants. The first one had long blonde and very silky looking hair.
"Yeah, go wash your hair!" The second one with long brown silky hair said, pointing his finger at us.
"Who are these guys?" I asked, pointing my finger at those tacky looking dudes.
"Lionwhyte loyalists!" Lars drew his sword. "They call themselves the 'Hair Metal Militia'."
I readied the Separator. Then I noticed that there was something interesting about Lars's sword. "Huh?"
"Are you. looking at my sword?" Lars asked.
"Yeah." I replied. "Why didn't you tell me there were musical notes etched on it?"
"Musical notes?" Lars looked at his chipped and battered blade and noticed that the notes were glowing. "Just like on that tab slab." He let me read the notes. "This sword once belonged to Riggnarok long ago. It is known as 'Battle Cry'."
"Well then..." I unstrapped Clementine. "Time to sound the Battle Cry!"
...BATTLE CRY…
...Raise the spirits of the weary and inspire them to fight more fiercely with this ancient music from the Titans…
...Better than a 12 oz cup of espresso…
"Hey! Are you two ignoring us!?" The blonde dudes complained as I played the solo…
Once I finished…
Everything went completely quiet. The sound of pickaxes, shovels and hammers stopped. Even that 'one day more' chant stopped. Well that's because all those miner dudes suddenly stopped working and were all looking at us.
"Ohh...Wha? What was that sound?"
"It's a devil screaming!"
"No, I think it's an angel singing!"
"It is the pounding of creation's hammer upon the anvil of time!" Man, that's deep.
"Well whatever it is, It's fucking awesome, guys!" No argument there, dude.
They all nodded and agreed with each other. It's safe to say we finally got their attention.
"It's called Heavy Metal." I addressed the miners. "And it's the real reason you should bang your heads. Not for that guy!" I pointed with Clementine at one of those statues.
They looked at each other, looked at that statue I was pointing at, then they looked at us. "Yeah! Screw this place."
"Yeah! Let's get outta here."
"Metal." They approached me and Lars.
"I'm impressed." Lars said.
"I'd thought you'd be." I replied.
But not everyone was cool with the Idea of joining Lars. Namely those two militia dudes. "Hey hang on, guys!" Blondie objected "I know we're all strugglin' right now. But I'm telling ya, This is all gonna pay off really soon."
"Yeah, our manager says that if we just work hard, and produce a high-quality product, that we'll all be able to move up to cush guard jobs in the General's Pleasure Tower." Brownie added. Yeah, that's what I'm callin' those two dudes.
Then Blondie continued. "There's gonna be piles of chicks and booze and stuff."
The miners looked at them first, then looked back at us. "We're with them." One of 'em pointed at us. Then they walked up and stood beside us.
"They've made their choice." Lars stated. "You'd do well to respect their decision." He warned, his sword readied.
Blondie and Brownie backed up a few steps. "Hey, guys sorry but we got a sweet gig here." Blondie replied. "And we're not about to let you grease-bags ruin it."
Then they run up to this nearby big mine cart. "Guards! Riot! Walkout!" They shouted. The mine cart rolled to one side opening up a path that led downwards. And coming up that path was this big- ass dude dressed like a medieval executioner. Geez this dude was as big as a grizzly and was all muscle.
"Grrrrrr!" He snarled, raising up his large gloved spiked fists.
"I heard those guys over there say they're organizing a union." Blondie pointed back at us.
The executioner dude then glared at us. "Grr!"
"We'll go sound the alarm!" Brownie shouted as they ran down the pathway. The mine cart rolled back, closing off the path as the big dude smacked his fists together. Then the alarm started to sound.
"Okay, dudes don't worry. I have a..." I started to say but Lars and a group of miners rushed the big dude. "Plan? Hey! Did I say Charge?"
"You just did." Lars replied as he swung at that executioner.
The big dude swung a punch at Lars, but he just sidestepped the blow that smashed into a buried car fender behind him, crumpling it like it was tinfoil.
"YAH!" Lars then cleaved his arm off with a downward chop of Battle Cry. Just as one of the miners smashed that guys face in with his sledgehammer, knocking him on his back. Then another miner finished him off by driving his pickaxe right into his heart.
"Whoohoo" The miners all cheered as they stood around the fallen executioner.
"Man, I wanted to do that forever. "The dude with the sledgehammer said.
"That's for killing Charlie, you bastard!" The dude with the pickaxe added as he kicked the dead executioner.
"Woah, heh heh, okay." I got their attention as I approached. "Hey, hey, see how much ass you dudes kicked when you band together like that? That's awesome."
"I agree, Edward." Lars nodded. "It's clear you men would make better warriors than miners."
"Warriors huh?" One of the miners replied. "I like the sound of that." The others nodded.
"Now with just a little bit of practice, I bet I could turn you dudes into a well-oiled machine of death." I said. "You into it?"
They looked at each other and mumbled for a bit, then they looked back at me and all nodded.
"Okay first..." I lift the Separator high above my head. "When I do this, it means you gotta follow me, Okay? Same goes for Lars when he holds Battle Cry high."
They all nodded.
"Okay let's try it." I performed the 'follow' gesture. "Gather around, me warriors!" I shouted. They quickly form up on me. "That's what I'm talking about! Okay let's practice moving in formation."
"On it. Gotcha!" They replied. I headed over towards that yellow Lionwhyte statue. They followed close behind me. When we got to that statue, they started smashing it into rubble. Garbled sounds and sparks came out as it crumbled and collapsed into a heap of yellow rubble.
"Oh all right, yeah. Kill it" I said as they smashed up said statue. "You've earned yourselves some destroy. Enjoy."
"Hah hah, you guys nailed that dude."
"A pity that it isn't the real thing." Lars added. "Oh well, can't complain."
"Well okay, next lesson. Opposite style. When me or Lars does this..." I held up my left fist. "It means DON'T follow us." I wag my finger. "Stay put. Defend this hallowed ground. Got it?"
They look at one another.
I pointed at that scrap pile to my left. "Defend that pile of scrap with your very lives." I ordered. Okay here we go." I headed over to the scrap pile and give the 'defend' gesture. "Chill for a sec." I called out. They gathered around me. "Really good, you guys. Now that means stay put for real. Me and Lars are gonna walk over to that purple statue over there, and we don't want anybody to follow us."
Me and Lars headed over to that purple Lionwhyte statue. "Okay, I'm gonna turn around now." I said, facing that tacky-ass statue. "And If I see anyone following us, I'm going to be really disappointed." Like a drill sergeant. Me and Lars turn around and…
They were all still at that scrap pile.
"Yes! You guys pass. For now." Well so far so good. "But now we gotta huddle up for the big finale."
"May I, Edward?" Lars asked.
"Sure thing." I nodded. Lars did the 'follow' gesture.
"To Me!" He shouted. The Miners raced over to us. And they smashed that gaudy-ass purple statue into a pile of sparking garbling purple rubble. "Music to my ears." Lars smiled.
"Okay, next lesson." I got their attention. "Now this time, we're gonna mix it up. Me and Lars'll defend this area while you dudes go kick the shit outta that blue statue over there." I thumbed at the offending statue.
"Let's do it." They said, looking eager and rarin' to go.
"Okay so when either me or Lars do this..." I do the devil horns gesture. "You go completely nut shit at whatever we're pointing at, okay? Get ready." I do the 'attack' gesture at the blue statue. "Take no prisoners!" I commanded.
"Got it." They rushed over to the blue statue…
Which has just become a pile of of sparking garbling blue rubble.
"Good job on that one." Lars commented as we headed over.
"I can't believe we used to mine together" One of them said.
"I know right." Another replied. "Lionwhyte sucks!"
"He wears white after Labor Day!"
"Death to Lionwhyte!"
"I hate statues!"
"Well done, I'm proud of you boys." I congratulated the group. "What do you wanna call yourselves?"
They argued for a bit headbutted each other a few times, and they nodded and gave me their answer. "You dudes can call us Headbangers."
"'Cause we like to bang our heads."
"Alright then, Headbangers it is." I agreed.
"But to build an army big enough to take on the real Lionwhyte, we're gonna need some more dudes." I pointed at the big mine cart blocking the path downward. "We gotta bust your fellow Headbangers out of these stupid mines. Whaddaya say? ARE YOU WITH US!?"
"YEAH!" They all shouted. "METAL!"
I approached the mine cart, Separator in my right, and my left doing the 'attack' gesture at the mine cart. "ASS KICKERS UNITE!" I shouted. The Headbangers raced up and reduced that mine cart to scrap metal…
And unblocked the path leading on down. "Nice work. let's go." And I led them deeper into the mines…
"No Headbanger left behind!"
(The Gyre)
We made our way down the path that was leading to an even larger pit. I felt the heat hit my face when we arrived. And what we saw…
Woah! There was this big multi floored… mill wheel. You know, kinda like that 'wheel of pain' from that old 'Conan The Barbarian' movie back in the '80s. Only this one had several floors, and each floor had nearly a hundred or so slaves pushing away on the posts.
Also, instead of milling grain, this wheel was churning a huge whirlpool of what looked like molten metal. Which was being fed by more slaves dumping car parts into that swirling mass.
That's when it hit me. This isn't a mine…
It's a scrapping yard! They're melting down cars for their metal.
Then we heard this voice. "FASTER! KEEP MOVING!" Me and Lars looked up to see that it was coming from this even bigger looking executioner dude, who was hearing a headset to amp up his gravely sounding voice. "HEY! NO FAINTING ON THE GYRE!"
"Let us put a stop to this, once and for all." Lars suggested.
"You don't have to tell me twice!" I played the 'Battle Cry ' solo to charge us up and I led the group of about fifty or so headbangers, and Lars, down towards the floor. "LET'S DO THIS! LEEEEEROY JENKINS!"
We had to smash our way through a few barriers, a couple of those Lionwhyte statues, and got a few more recruits before we arrived at the Gyre.
And got that big guys attention.
"TRUSTEES!" He called out. "WE ARE UNDER ATTACK! CRUSH THE INTRUDERS AND THEIR BAND OF TRAITORS! POUND THEM INTO THICK PASTE!"
"Better kiss your butt goodbye!" A 'trustee' shouted as he led his fellow garishly clad militiamen at us. Well if they wanna fight, let's give 'em one.
(BGM; Rock Of Ages, by DEF Leppard)
We engaged the first group of Hair Metal Militia and lemme tell ya, it was one wild brawl. Me and Lars mowed down several of 'em between the two of us as the rest of the boys made a mess outta 'em with their shovels hammers, pickaxes, and lots of head-butting.
After that was done I glared up at that big dude. "Is that all you got, Mittens!?" I shouted up at him. Yeah, I'm calling him Mittens. Also that got a chuckle outta Lars and a few of the headbangers.
Mittens glared back at us.
"TRAITORS! ANIMALS! I'D RATHER SEE YOU DEAD THAN FREE!" He growled back. "AND YOU DARED TO CALL ME MITTENS!? WHY I OUGHTA..." He suddenly pointed at the Gyre. "CRIPPLE THE GRINDING GYRE! BURN THE UNGRATEFUL MAN-COGS!"
More of those Hair Metal dudes emerged from the surrounding tunnels, all armed with hammers of pick, sledge and jack persuasion. They were racing towards the Gyre's supporting columns. Doesn't take a genius to figure out what they're gonna do.
"TAKE OUT THE SUPPORTS! THE GYRE MUST FALL!" Mittens ordered.
"Edward! We have to protect the supports of the Grinding Gyre!" Lars stated. "If we are to save those men trapped on it!"
"No kidding!" I replied. I didn't like the idea of all those dudes falling into that pool of molten metal.
We raced over to the' lightning bolt' support column 'cause that's where they attacking first.
We soon took down that group after a fierce fight.
I took out one of those executioner dudes by shocking him with Clementine them set him on fire and chopped him up with the Separator while Lars managed to decapitate another one with Battle Cry, sending his head flying into the pool of molten metal.
Then we heard an alarm and saw two more groups race towards our column and another one. "They're attacking two supports at the same time!" One of the headbangers shouted.
"I'll take half of the men and protect this column!" Lars said. "You take the rest and go defend that other one!"
"Got it!" I replied. "WITH ME!" I led half of our headbanger army around to the 'Maltese Cross' column. I broke up their formation with a power slide and started hackin' and zappin'. Clementine was almost red-hot by the time we finished those dudes. I looked back over at Lars' group, and see they they got things under control.
"ARRRGH! BRING IT DOWN! NOW!" Mittens shouted.
I led my group over to the 'Skull' Column to protect it from the next wave. Had to take down an executioner dude while the headbangers fought the militia dudes.
"They're attacking both supports on the far side!" A headbanger shouted, pointing at the fighting going on on the other side of the pool. We ran back over and helped Lars and his headbangers defend the columns. After a wild and really messy brawl, we sent what's left of the militia packing.
But, by then quite a few of the headbangers were injured in the constant fighting. And we lost a few of them.
I noticed an elevator leading up to Mittens' platform. "Lars I'm gonna go up and finish this." I said. "Can you hold the fort while I take care of this dude?"
"I think I can, Edward." Lars replied. "Make it quick. I don't how long it'll be before more reinforcements arrive."
I ran over to the elevator and took it up to Mittens…
"ENOUGH!" Mittens shouted just as I arrived at his floor. Then he heard the elevator door open and turned to face me standing there arms folded and smoking a cigarette. He flipped a switch on his headset.
"You think you killed them all, don't you?" He said to me. "Well you forgot my favorites, my managers. The ones who keep all my other workers in line. The only two I know I can always count on."
He raised his two large fists. "Fear, and Pain!" His right spiked had 'FEER' written on the plated knuckles, and his left knuckles had 'PANE' written on 'em. Dude musta flunked school or something.
Well, better deal with this dude. I flicked away my cigarette, took the Separator in hand and charged at Mittens.
He managed to block my swing with those huge-ass fists of his. Then he countered with 'Feer', sending me flying back a good twenty feet or so.
Then I had to roll outta the way when he did a jumping strike, trying to cave in my face with 'Pane'. Left a really big dent in the floor. No two ways around it, this dude was gonna be tough.
Not to mention he was pretty much shock and flame proof. Yeah he was shaking off my guitar attacks. Need to find some way to break his guard. Then I noticed those carts full of scrap metal rolling overhead. Hmmm, I wonder…
I managed to get Mittens in position of one of those carts and performed the 'Earthshaker'. The shockwave caused the cart to jump the rails and down on mittens head, knocking that bastard completely silly and making him drop his guard.
I immediately waled om him with the 'Rock Kick', hacking his chest and belly with the Separator and finishing him off by kicking him right to the edge.
He teetered on the platform edge, trying to keep his insides from becoming his outsides with 'Pane', now completely red with his own blood which was pouring outta those wounds I inflicted. He switched on headset using 'Feer' as he coughed up mouthful after mouthful of his blood.
"COUGH COUGH… GUARDS…! HAK HAK… ALL… GUARDS…! COUGH… CODE RED…! COUGH… I REPEAT…! CODE..." Then he fell off the platform. He bounced off the Gyre a couple times, causing his headset to come off and land next to Lars. And he fell into the molten metal, burning to ashes.
I took the elevator back down to rejoin the celebrating Headbangers.
"All right! Yeah!" They were shouting as I approached. Looks like they found themselves a few cases of beer. "Yay! Yeah!" I was about to help myself to a bottle when…
It turned out we celebrated a bit too early! The doors bust open and a whole bunch of those executioner dudes came pouring out ans were stampeding right at us! And lemme tell ya, that's a lotta really big dudes!
"No way, there's too many!" One of the Headbangers said. No kidding!
"What are we gonna do?" Another asked.
"We're gonna need another army!" A third Headbanger added.
Then I noticed the headset on the ground. "Lars, I have an idea, Grab that headset and point it at me!"
"Okay." Lars picked up the headset and aimed its microphone towards me as I unstrapped Clementine. "But how is this going to help us?"
"Like this!" And I played the 'Battle Cry' solo right at the microphone, and whammy-barred on the last note.
The Headbangers on the Gyre suddenly stopped working. They all looked down at us, and next thing we knew they all jumped off the Gyre and joined up with us.
"Hey what took you guys so long?" A Headbanger said as we fought off the executioner dudes.
Thanks to our reinforcements, we soon defeated those dudes and sent the few remaining running off to the hills.
"Well, Lars, looks like we got ourselves an army fit for a king." I said as I wiped the blood and bits of innards off the Separator.
"Indeed." Lars nodded as he cleaned off Battle Cry. "These men are truly valiant warriors."
I slung Separator on my back and began to address our new army.
"Listen up! In honer of you guys, we're calling this new army 'IRONHEADE'!" I christened our army. "With an 'e' on the end, so people will know we're not messin' around."
"Ironheade..." One of the Headbangers replied.
"I like it." Replied another.
"Right on!" Added a third. "I don't get it."
"Edward, we need to return to Bladehenge, before Ophelia does something foolish." Lars suggested.
"Right, we still need to spring the ladies for her." I agreed, seeing as we now sprung the dudes. Sort of. We can now concentrate on rescuing the ladies. "So let's get back to Bladehenge and get this army started!" I declared.
"IRONHEADE!" They all shouted.
***BRÜTAL VICTORY***
(End Part 3)
Author's Notes;
Figured, for this chapter, I had Lars help Eddie with freeing the Headbangers.
Anyhoo, next chapter Eddie and Lars return to Bladehenge only to learn that, while they were away, Ophelia went and did something foolish.