AN: This takes place after Matt's return to Dodge at the end of The Disciple. A serious wound to his gun arm made him decide to leave town, but in the final scenes of the episode we see him return to Kitty and resume his job as marshal. For those who like to know the plan is 8 chapters, 1 a day.

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Upstairs in the Long Branch – Kitty's Suite

"This looks mighty good Kitty."

Dazzling in a form fitting royal blue dress, Kitty Russell smiled across the table at Matt. "Well then, let's dig in."

Holding a fork with his left hand, Matt grabbed a knife with his right, and smoothly cut a corner from his steak. A smile touched his lips. His enjoyment was as much for cutting the meat, as for the juicy morsel he was about to pop into his mouth. "It sure feels good to handle a knife like normal, or close to it." He bit the meat off his fork. "Mmm that is tasty." He looked over at Kitty. Eyes cast down, she was pushing food around on her plate. The air around them grew thick. They ate in silence. Minutes passed. Matt couldn't stand it. He set his fork down and leaned forward. "Kitty, did I say something wrong?" She raised her eyes to meet his. "No, it's just that cutting a piece of steak doesn't mean that that arm of yours is as good as new." She regretted the harshness of her tone, but not her words.

"I didn't say my arm was good as new. I said it feels good to use it like normal, or close to normal. You saw me shave this morning. I did that pretty smooth. And Doc says he was wrong about me having to re-learn using the hand from scratch. It's coming back a whole lot faster than he thought possible."

"Shaving and cutting meat aren't the same as drawing a gun."

"True, you're right of course." His voice was filled with measured patience. She bristled. "Matt, you're still wearing that cross-draw gunbelt, to draw with your left hand. You're not fast with it – to put it bluntly." Her stare was icy.

"Kitty, why do I get the feeling you're trying to start an argument. There is nothing we disagree on here. My left hand draw isn't fast, but the gun grip has gotten strong and steady, and the aim is true. Meanwhile, I'm working on my right hand draw, and Doc gave me exercises to strengthen the hand. The right hand draw will come back."

"When? 2 months 12, 6, 18 - when?" She jumped up from the table and stormed across the room. Arms crossed in front of her, she stood at the window and stared outside.

Matt stayed where he was, and tried to figure out what to do or say. He glanced over at Kitty, took a deep breath and walked over to stand behind her. "Kitty, there's no knowing exactly how long it will take for my draw to be what it was." He gently put his hands on her shoulders. "But, right after I got shot, Doc thought I'd have to re-learn things like buttoning a shirt, shaving, using a pen, everything. He was wrong and he admits it. Handling a gun with my right hand is coming back. It will take work, but I'll get there."

"If you survive." The words dangled in the air. Kitty slowly let out a breath, and turned to face Matt. "Remember 4 years ago, when you were gunned down in the street by robbers, and I ran away to my friend in Ballard?" She waited for his nod. "I learned a lot from that. Not about our love, that was never in doubt, but I learned what can happen to a town when no one has the courage to uphold the law. I learned how much pride you took in who you were and what you stood for. I realized that I was proud of you too. So, when I came back to Dodge I figured out how to handle it better – your job, the danger you were in – all of it. Since then, we've had our ups and down for sure, but I've been happy, we've been happy. Thing is, for me, part of what held me steady, was knowing how well you could handle that gun of yours. Sure, someone might be faster, but you were up there with the best of them. That gave me comfort, something to hang on to. Matt, I don't have that comfort now, and I – I feel lost without it. I'm jumpy and worried and I can't think straight or even act normal. I'm not the person I want to be – not at work, not with friends, even not with you. So, I've decided to go on a trip. I can't be in Dodge right now. I have to get away for a while."

"A while?" Matt frowned, "How long?"

"I really don't know. 2 months, 6 months, maybe more. I'll be in touch, and I'll let you know where I am as I travel. I already took on a partner at the Long Branch, a woman named Hannah. We've known each other for years from business conventions. She paid cash for half the saloon, and I'll use that for travel expenses. She'll run the place while I'm away. When I get back, maybe you and I will be able to make some plans. We've been kind of vague in that area." She looked up into his eyes. "Matt, please don't try to talk me out of this."

He pulled her close and put his arms around her. "Kitty when my gun-arm got shot and I decided to leave town, I knew you didn't want me to go. I didn't want to hurt you, but I had to be away for a time, for a lot of reasons. You accepted it and saw me off. Now the positions are reversed. I don't want you to go, but I can tell by looking at you, that you have to take this trip. So, I should see you off. When do you plan on leaving?"

"Tomorrow morning. I'll be on the early train to San Francisco. And Matt, I'll be in touch where ever I go, and I'll be back." She reached up and stroked his cheek. "Now, let's finish dinner and then, Cowboy, I expect you to give me a night to remember."

The Next Morning

Matt stared down the tracks until the train carrying Kitty away from Dodge disappeared from sight. Doc stood beside him rubbing his mustache, "I can't believe you didn't try to stop Kitty from leaving."

"It's just a trip, Doc. She'll be back."

"If I were you, I wouldn't be so sure. Maybe that's her intention now, but she'll be traveling, meeting new people, seeing new places." Doc looked up at the marshal. "You could have kept her from going if you tried."

"And I figure you're gonna tell me exactly how I could have done that." Matt sighed and shook his head.

"Yes I am. You could have set that badge aside for good, bought Pete Crowley's horse ranch – it's up for sale you know - and offered Kitty marriage and a home."

"Doc, I see a couple of things wrong with that idea. One, I'm not ready to set aside this badge, and two, I guarantee Kitty doesn't want to live out on ranch 10 or 12 miles from town. Can you even picture that?"

"Well," Doc scratched behind his ear. "No – guess not. But still…."

"Kitty's taking a trip, Doc. She has her reasons. She'll be back." Matt turned on his heel. "I have to get back to work." Doc watched him walk away and whispered. "You'd better hope she'll be back, for your sake my good friend, and mine, and more than a few other folks around here."

TBC