Erwin wasn't even sure how long he had been awake at this point. It had to be longer than two days at this point. He rubbed through his eyes as he still tried to stay awake to be by Levi's side. The fever hadn't gone down, but eventually Erwin had felt so warm, Levi's body searing against his that he had left the bed.

Carefully, he sat on the edge of the bed now, caressing the side of his face.

It had been a few hours since he had been awake and Erwin had stayed by his side, still trying to cool his head with the cold water and cloth. He felt the fever was going down a little, but he couldn't sure about it. Maybe it was just him being hopeful.

After a while, he was concerned Levi laying for too long, the last thing he needed was sores on his body. He thought of all the times Levi had so lovingly taken care of him after Shiganshina – although Levi would never admit that - and he didn't want to do any worse of a job.

Levi's body was limp as he gently moved him, the man seeming even lighter and smaller than usually. Laying him on his left side, he was extra careful moving his arm and laying his right hand near his face. He had thought he would wake up, but Levi remained fast asleep.

Looking at Levi's worn face, he thought back of that day – 9 years ago already- he had met him in the Underground. He had been so grateful when Levi had joined the corps, after all that had happened with Levi being on the job from Lovof. At the time it was just because he wanted a strong soldiers, but it had landed him so much more in the end.

Gently, he caressed through his hair, the strands of dark hair between his fingers as his large finger caressed over his head.

He had known him for nine years now. The first years were hard between them, often butting heads. Levi wasn't an easy person to even like. Let alone like enough to become friends with. But eventually they had grown closer, to the point a year before Shiganshina where Erwin realized that as Levi became easier to like, he also became easier to love.

Suddenly, Levi's eye met his, Erwin smiling at him.

'Hey,' Erwin said softly, carefully moving his hand against his forehead. His forehead was still burning and he bit his lip, worried about Levi.

'You look – you look like shit,' Levi whispered and Erwin felt a wry smile form on his face.

'You are one to talk,' he teased Levi back, knew that the man didn't want this sympathy or pity. The corner of Levi's mouth curled up for just a second, his eye closed again as he felt exhausted from fighting the infection, even though he had only been awake for a few seconds.

'Have you slept at all?' Levi enquired. His body ached as he laid on his side, but glad to be facing Erwin, their faces close as Erwin sat on the ground by the bed, his hand still on his head.

Looking at him though, he felt worried more about the man across from him than about himself, seeing how tired Erwin looked. He was pretty sure that the bags under Erwin's eyes were worse than his own.

'Hmm,' Erwin just hummed, not wanting to answer it. He knew Levi would want him to sleep, but he was too worried to do that.

'So no?' Levi mumbled, annoyed – but equally worried, looking at Erwin's worn face.

'You were by my bedside for days after Shiganshina, I am not going anywhere either,' Erwin told him, thinking back of how he had awoken in the HQ after Shiganshina, Levi by his bedside. The following days, weeks, as the wounds in his stomach were healing, Levi had been by his side every moment he opened his eyes. Sometimes reading a book, sometimes just staring out of the window and one rare time, even asleep in the chair beside his bed.

'Things are not the same, I got a chair, you are sitting on the floor – I don't need sleep and you do – you were getting better with constant medical care and I am not feeling any better,' Levi pointed out, struggling to get through each sentence he said.

'You will start feeling better, I am sure,' Erwin assured him, caressing the side of his face.

Feeling Erwin caress the side of his face, he felt horrible knowing that Erwin was treating himself poorly because of him. He saw how tired the man was and knew he hadn't slept or probably even eaten in days.

'You might just need to leave me, Erwin. Get to safety,' Levi said softly, his eye falling shut again, as much as he tried to fight it.

'Levi?'

He came crawling from behind the furnace, pulling himself up as he looked at his mom. His tiny footsteps reverberated through the room as he made his way to the bed.

'Hey – there you are,' Kuchel sighed as she laid her hand on his head, ruffling through the large mop of thick black hair – so similar to her own. Before she had usually cut the lower layers to thin his hair out a little. But the last few weeks she hadn't had the energy, already having been ill for nearly two months now. Even though there had not been a client for weeks either, Levi still holed up behind the furnace where he usually hid before and she wasn't sure if it was habit or it made him feel safe. It did break her heart though.

Another coughing fit brought the hair ruffling to an end, Levi looking up at her with his big steel blue eyes. Looking at her hand, the tips of her fingers seemed to become more and more purple and she knew she was not long for this world anymore.

'I need you to know that I will always love you,' Kuchel told him, caressing the side of his face as he looked up to her with his big eyes.

His tiny hands grabbed around her hand for a second and she smiled.

'You need to go and find Gresh – he may help you, ' Kuchel told her son, not sure if her master was going to help the little boy, but it was all the hope she had. She hadn't seen her brother for years and was sure that he wouldn't care about the small boy anyway.

He still didn't say anything, just looking up at her with his big eyes.

'Please Levi, you need to go,' she told him, scared that he was going to starve if he stayed here any longer. She hadn't been able to provide with anything for days and she wasn't sure what to do but to hope that her master would help him.

'Levi, go!' Kuchel told him again and finally the boy started walking, pushing the door open and stumbling into the hallway. He nearly stumbled over the long robe – his mother's – that he was wearing. He barely left this room and looked around a little confused.

The robe getting stuck under his foot, Levi tripped, falling to the stone floor. Beside him, a door opened, an older man leaving the room. He looked down at Levi for just a second, stepping over him then as he left the brothel. Scrambling up, Levi started stumbling down the hallway again. There was barely any light in the hallway and he felt scared, wanting to go back to his mother, to the room he knew.

After stopping one more time, too scared to proceed, he made his way to the lobby, seeing Gresh behind the counter. Walking behind him, he wasn't sure what to do or say, just standing behind him.

The large man finally turned around, jumping back as he spotted him.

'You look like a ghost, kid!' Gresh said as he caught his breath, looking freaked out as he looked at Levi.

'Wait, you are Kuchels little runt, right?' Gresh finally said he squatted down across in front of the small boy. He looked at him with big large steel blue eyes, the spitting image of Kuchel – but he was also sure something wasn't quite right with the boy. He was tiny, pale and almost sickly looking and Gresh backed off, worried he was sick, just like his mother.

'Help,' Levi finally said. His voice was shaky and barely audible. So soft that Gresh didn't even hear him.

Gresh wasn't sure what to do. He hated seeing the little kid living in squalor. He had told Kuchel not to have the kid, not to keep him here and get out of this life. But he was well aware that she had no other choice and that is why he never kicked her out, even with the kid living in the room.

He shouldn't be here.

But he wasn't that much of a heartless bastard.

'You hungry?' he finally asked. It seemed a stupid question. His face was sunken in, the robe – Kuchel's he figured - just as thin as his body – as pale as his skin too – his boney shoulders were sticking out through the fabric. He had seen poor kids in the underground, but no kid matched this little runt.

'Come on, let's get you something to eat,' Gresh said.

A few minutes later, Levi was running back towards the room with an apple he had gotten from Gresh. Gresh had told him to eat it, but eventually Gresh had told him to get out of sight, before any customers would appear.

Careful not to trip over the robe again, he made his way back to the room.

Walking back inside the room, he didn't say anything as he climbed onto the bed, putting the apple by his mother's head, smiling proud.

Slipping between his mother's arms. They were rigid, cold and there was no reply when he asked for her.

Erwin got up to stretch his legs, his eyes almost falling shut. Letting go of Levi's left hand, their fingers intertwined, he got up.

Looking at the dirty bandages, he knew he needed to clean the wounds on his face, figuring it would be best to do that instead of sitting down worrying about falling asleep. Being active was easier than sitting down, doing nothing.

Standing up to get some more water, he walked outside to go to the well.

His legs were hurting from sitting on the floor and he wasn't sure how long he could keep going like this. He wanted to do right for Levi and he knew as a soldier he could set everything aside for a while. He just hoped that Levi would get better and he would at least get rid of the fever before Erwin would eventually collapse.

Looking out for any tracks or signs of life, he was glad to conclude that not much had happened around the farm where they holed up.

The sky was red and he heard the noise from the city between the walls, not too far away. For a second he thought of getting closer, find out what was going on. But there was no way he could make in there in his scouts uniform. People would recognize him. He couldn't fully disguise his face – and especially not his missing arm. If he got found out he wouldn't be able to return to take care of Levi. The risk was too big.

Suddenly, thunder seemed to strike his body.

Sinking to his knees, not sure what came over him, it went black in front of his eyes.

Shit, Levi – he had to get back inside.

'Subjects of Ymir…' he heard Eren's voice in his head.

Levi wasn't sure how long he had drifted off when he opened his eye again. Careful he brought his hand up, wanting to feel what was going on with his right eye, but realized that wasn't going to help him, his fingers missing. Turning his hand, he felt the bandages with his ring and pinky finger.

Groaning as he tried and sit up, pushing himself up with his left arm, he sat up against the wall. Pain shot through his body and black spots danced in front of his eyes again.

Looking around the room, Erwin wasn't there.

Taking a second to catch his breath, he hoped that Erwin was finally bringing himself to safety. Trying to feel the rest of his face he brought up his hand again.

He tried to remember what had happened. He remembered some of it, Zeke, the cart – the thunder spear. It had seemed clearer yesterday, but it was hard to remember now.

His hand fell down on his chest again, the stumps hurting.

Looking around some more, he saw the sheet by the small window, light seeping through. It was hard to make out if it was the middle of the day or early or later, but he was hoping things would finally become clearer. He hated the constant haze in his head he was feeling, especially since he usually barely slept at all.

The empty room suddenly made him feel at peace. He hoped Erwin was finally taking care of himself, hating to see how much he was neglecting himself because of him. He wasn't used to anyone taking care of him – he wasn't even used to being this hurt.

Coughing, he felt his whole body hurt.

He heard somebody at the door, probably alarmed by his coughing. Slipping his left leg out of the bed, his left hand on his knee now, he jumped up.

'Stay out of here, I'll kill you!' he yelled as the door opened, his leg nearly crumbling under him as he tried to stand up, his right leg not following as he felt pain in his hip. Besides the bed laid one of Erwin's blades, the handle missing but he tried to grab for it.

'It's me!' Erwin said, dropping what he was carrying and rushing over, quickly grabbing Levi before he could fall over.

'I got you, I got you,' Erwin said, helping him sit down again as Levi grabbed onto him. He felt Levi hanging onto him, not being able to carry his weight and Erwin laid him down. Trying to catch his breath, Levi felt dizzy, pain searing through his body. After a few moments, the pain finally made place for the loving feeling off Erwin caressing over the side of his face.

'Hey, I was waiting till you would wake – just left for a minute to scout outside,' Erwin said gentle.

'You have been waiting for days for me to wake up,' Levi dryly panted and Erwin smiled.

'Yeah, but that doesn't mean I am not happy every time you wake up,' Erwin told him, Levi realizing how long the days had to be for Erwin between the constant worrying and looking after him. Erwin looked worse than a few hours ago, worried, on edge.

Erwin didn't say anything as he stood up. He put the water he had gotten on the fire, wanting to clean it and heat it up as he needed to take care of his wounds.

He couldn't tell Levi. He couldn't tell him the walls were gone. He couldn't tell him what he had seen in the distance. For now he just felt grateful that Levi was too out of it to feel the ground shaking, hear the rumbling in the distance. Inside this house, he could pretend with Levi the world outside didn't exist. It was clear Levi had not heard the words that Eren had spoken inside their head.

'Erwin – are you okay?' Levi finally asked, sensing something was wrong.

'Yeah – just gonna clean your wounds, okay?' Erwin said, trying to ban everything that had just happened out of his mind.

Taking the bowl and the cloth, he carefully started rolling the bandages away. It was hard, trying to support his head with what remained of his left arm, but eventually he managed,

The wound looked gnarly, red and inflamed. His right eye was closed, some blood right under it that still seemed fresh. Taking a deep breath, he carefully started to wash his face, the relatively unharmed left side first. The small wounds from the debris that he had pulled out were healing.

'How bad is it?' Levi finally asked. Even Erwin's touch on the left side of his face hurt. He wasn't looking towards to him getting to the scar.

Erwin didn't answer and that was enough of an answer to Levi.

'Need me to stop?' Erwin asked as he felt Levi wince as soon as he got near the deep, gnarly wound.

'No,' Levi admitted. His breath sharpened as Erwin got near his eye.

'Hurts?' Erwin enquired again, not wanting to hurt him.

'It's okay,' Levi assured him. It hurt really bad, but Levi knew it had to be done too. Erwin looked so concerned he didn't want to worry him even more.

Getting closer to his eye, he gritted his teeth as Erwin carefully moved his eyelid.

'Can you see with the eye?' Erwin asked, although when he looked at the eye, he was afraid he could already guess the answer.

'No,' Levi admitted, immediately annoyed by the face full of sorrow Erwin gave him. He knew the implications of it, but it was something he didn't even want to think about.

'Maybe your sight will come back in the eye,' Erwin just said.

'Sure, like your arm grew back?' Levi snarked back at him and Erwin stopped cleaning his face.

'Sorry, I just wanna be hopeful – it is really hard seeing you hurt,' Erwin admitted, turning away from Levi and putting the cloth back in the bowl as he looked at the floor.

'I know – I am sorry,' Levi said as he laid his left hand on Erwin's shoulder for a second.

Looking back at him, surprised as Levi never apologized, Erwin just nodded.

'It's okay,'

'Alright, let's get through this,' Levi said as he knew a large part of his face – the most painful part – still had to be done. Erwin nodded, as much as he didn't want to hurt Levi, it had to be done. Moving closer, he kissed him on his forehead.

'If there is anything I can do to make you more comf-'

'That helped,' Levi admitted, Erwin smiling and slowly, carefully, cleaning around the wounds.

Erwin looked up as the door to his office opened. The fact that there was no knock implied that it would be Levi. He had the tendency to just walk in ever since they had gotten so comfortable with each other. Smiling at Levi, he realized it had been another day he hadn't left his office.

'I didn't see you at dinner – figured you might be hungry,' Levi said as he put the plate down on the desk.

'Thanks, that is really thoughtful of you,' Erwin smiled. Although he wasn't hungry and he could have asked somebody to send something up, he couldn't be happier to see Levi. Levi sat down on the edge of his desk, moving the plate a little closer.

'Gotta warn you, it tastes like shit – you should eat though,' Levi said as he moved the sloppy plate of food closer.

'Wow, sounds appealing,' Erwin chuckled.

'You've gotten skinny since Shiganshina,' Levi said bluntly. It was four months ago now that Erwin had miraculously survived his injuries. But even now that his wounds are healed, Levi still thought he looked skinny. Especially since he seemed to skip meals more and more when he was holed up in his office learning more about Marley.

'Just haven't been training that much, it's just muscle mass,' Erwin assured him as he moved the plate aside, the food looking dreadful and laying his hand on Levi's thigh.

'You should eat,' Levi said, knew he was lying. His hand on his thigh wouldn't sway him. After the abdominal injuries Erwin suffered in Shiganshina, he had been able to look past it for a bit as he was healing, but no longer.

'Fine, I will – just – let's go to the tavern, okay? Eat some real food,' Erwin invited him. Levi looked a bit surprised, Erwin hadn't left HQ once since Shiganshina and gladly he nodded.

'Yeah, you are happy to leave the Marley shit for a night?' Levi asked, a little hopeful since Erwin had barely even left his office since he had gotten out of the infirmary and gotten to reading the journals.

'Sure,' Erwin smiled as he got up. Grabbing his coat, he followed Levi to his own room so he could grab his coat as well, leaving HQ together.

As they left the gates of HQ, Erwin took his hand for just a second, letting go again as they spotted other people. As much as they had shared most of their nights together over the last year, they were still not ready to admit their feelings to the world.

The air was crisp, a little cold as they made their way towards the tavern. In the dim streetlights, Levi looked at Erwin walking beside him. His face was lit up by the streetlights they passed, his face chiseled and his blue eyes glistening each time they passed one.

Walking with Erwin always meant he had to almost jog a little to keep up, Erwin's long legs making such large strides that he was falling back. Erwin noticed so though and slowed down a little.

Looking over at Erwin, he felt so grateful that he had survived Shiganshina, especially after almost saying goodbye to him on that roof – no, he had said goodbye. When he had given the serum to Armin, he had said goodbye to Erwin. It was a choice he hadn't want to make and even though Erwin and him had never discussed it, he did feel guilty about it.

Erwin caught him looking, smiling as they were almost at the tavern. He laid his hand on Levi's back for a second, only taking it off to open the door for him.

'After you,' Erwin smiled. They got a table in the corner, away from the rowdy crowd.

Erwin studied Levi's face as he was looking at the menu, the captain looking a little unsure and Erwin wasn't sure if it was about the money. The Captain's salary wasn't great.

'My treat,' Erwin told Levi.

'No, I can pay for myself,' Levi said as he looked over the menu. Before he could argue over it again, Erwin snatched the menu from his hands and got up to order at the bar. Within fifteen minutes, their table was full of different dishes to share, as well as a bottle of wine to share.

'You didn't have to order all this,' Levi said, his cheeks a little flushed as he didn't like taking things from other people, not even Erwin. Not even after all these years of being comrades, friends and now even something more.

'But I wanted to,' Erwin smiled, pouring the wine in their glasses.

'Alright, fine,' Levi finally relented as Erwin handed him one of the glasses. Hitting their glasses together, he was happy to be out here with Erwin.

Before he could take a sip, Erwin looked around them, nobody paying any mind to them as they sat in the corner of the tavern. He laid his hand on the side of Levi's face, kissing him passionately as his hand pulled him closer. Letting go after a few seconds, their heads slowly moved apart as Levi started to blush.

'People might recognize us,' Levi said a little worried.

'I don't care,' Erwin said, Levi blushing but smiling, quickly taking a sip of the wine as he wasn't sure how to give himself shape.

'Just happy to be alive,' Erwin explained, taking a sip as well as he winked at Levi.

Erwin was waiting for Levi to wake up again. Levi had eventually passed out as Erwin had cleaned his wounds. Levi had told him multiple times the pain wasn't too bad, but Erwin knew better. When he had lost is arm, at least they had been able to sedate him, he couldn't imagine how bad it must be for Levi. He had offered to bathe him too, but Levi hadn't been up for it. Considering how much he wanted to bathe, it worried Erwin.

He had made another round around the house, picking up some of the stuff that would be useful. He found a couple of bags of flour and oats in the shed, gladly taking them into the farmhouse. Having put some in the clean water, he noticed Levi stir a little. He hadn't slept long this time, but Erwin was just glad he rested.

Stirring through the pot in front of him, he closed his eyes for a few second. The wall crumbling, the lighting flashes, the sounds of war.

The marching titans.

He felt like a coward, holing up in here with Levi.

Hearing Levi cough, he looked over, seeing the man wake up again. His naps were shorter, although he still slept nearly nonstop.

'Making food?' Levi enquired from the bed.

'I found some oats and flour in the shed,' Erwin explained as he stirred through the oats and walked towards the bed.

'There were some berries outside but I didn't want to pick them and add them, not sure if they are poisonous – so it is a little bland,'

'It's fine,' Levi just smiled. Cleaning his wounds earlier had drained him and he wanted to object to eating, but knew Erwin wouldn't let it go.

Looking at the bowl of oats in Erwin's hand, he wanted to argue that he didn't want to be fed, but also knew that there was not a chance he was going to get away with not eating. Seeing Erwin's hand shake under the bowl, he knew that Erwin was at wits end too.

Erwin was careful, not to touch his lip as he fed Levi, Levi winced as the spoon touched the stitches on his lower lip. As gently as Erwin tried to be, he was hurting Levi and he hated doing that.

The last few years, he had gotten more and more used to his left hand having to become and becoming his dominant hand, but now he just felt clumsy.

Levi took a few more bites, the pain in his lip getting worse. He wanted to eat more, if only to make Erwin feel better. But he knew he wouldn't manage much more.

'I have had enough,' Levin just said, worried he was going to throw up. The pain in his face was making him feel like he had to throw up and the fever wasn't helping either. Erwin nodding, carefully cleaning around his mouth and pecking him on his forehead, gently.

Levi closed his eye for a second, wishing he could share one of the passionate kisses they had before. But as soon as Erwin stood up, he hated how tired and hungry he looked.

'We need to get out of here, you need to get out of here,' Levi said again. In these moments of clarity, he realized that by staying there, they were probably in danger with the yeagerists around and would eventually be found. But even more so, they needed to get out of here because while he was getting better, he needed Erwin to get better too.

'Things are not good out there Levi,' Was all he wanted to say, 'I don't know exactly, but things aren't good out there. We are safe here.'

'I let you go in Shiganshina, you should let me go too,' Levi said, not sure how truthful Erwin was – he was a honest man, but he would often just change the truth if he wanted to persuade people.

'Not letting you go - you are going to be okay,' Erwin said, a lump in his throat. As dire as it seemed, he wanted to be hopeful that Levi would pull through. That his Ackerman powers would be enough for him to pull through. But he wasn't going to leave him here, not a chance.

'You can't stay here – you are not eating and sleeping,' Levi said, feeling just as helpless as his mom had felt 30 years ago.

'I ate before feeding you,'

'Bullshit,' Levi said softly, 'I saw you cook, remember,'

'I'll have another bite then, just to prove it to you,' Erwin said as he ate a spoonful of the oats.

'One bite is not going to sustain you. You need to take care of yourself, really take care of yourself,' Levi pointed out. Erwin knew he was right.

'I will eat some more later, I promise,' he said, 'I will try and find some more food – when you are back asleep,'

'You need to sleep too,' Levi immediately said. Erwin looked down at the floor. He knew Levi was right, he was tired, it felt like his mind was slipping. His eyes were even falling shut at this point, but he wanted to stay awake for Levi. Getting up, he put the bowl away and grabbed the clean sheet he had found.

'If things get worse, you need to let me go,' Levi said softly, his eye falling shut again. He felt annoyed, kept on fighting it with all his might. He needed Erwin to be okay too and he knew that as long as he in this bed, Erwin wouldn't go anywhere.

'No,' Erwin said stern, as if he were commanding Levi instead of just talking to him.

'Then at least get some sleep,' Levi said, saying it stern but concerned about Erwin. The circles under his eyes were getting darker and darker, his hands shaking and his face worn.

'I am scared that we will be found if I go to sleep – and I can't protect you,' Erwin said as he pulled the clean sheet over Levi, taking his cape away as Levi seemed to be disgusted with it after how much he had been sweating under it.

'I know that is not what you are most worried about,' Levi said weakly. Even though he had been awake for a while now, he felt exhausted from just eating a few bites. The last thing he wanted was falling asleep again before knowing Erwin would finally take care of himself.

Erwin looked away, not wanting Levi to put into words what he had been so scared about. After a few days he wasn't even as concerned about being found again but looking at Levi, he felt scared about going to sleep, not sure how Levi would be when he woke up. His fever had not gone down and he felt Levi was getting paler and weaker.

'You are scared you wake up and I am dead,' Levi said, putting his fear into words, Erwin standing up as he looked at the floor. Even just hearing him say it made his stomach sink.

'Yeah,' Erwin finally admitted.

'The fever is bad and I may not be in great shape, but I am not going anywhere,' Levi said as he hoped Erwin would finally go to sleep.

'Fine,' the tall blonde finally sighed. Facing Levi again, he was glad to see a small smile on his face.

'I am still going to be here when you wake up,' Levi promised, Erwin nodding still a bit unsure.

'Come here?' Levi asked. A little unsure since he was scared to hurt Levi in his sleep, he pulled the bed away from the wall so he could get in and lay behind him, Levi looking a little surprised.

'What, you're not that heavy,' Erwin told him as he walked around the bed.

'You calling me small?' Levi teased as it was something Erwin often made fun off.

'No, just light,' Erwin said as he kicked off his boots.

'Tsk,' Levi just said softly.

'Did carry you in one arm.' Erwin teased Levi a bit. As dire as their situation was, he was still just glad to have a laugh with Levi, it calming down his worries just the slightest bit. With everything going on, having this small laugh meant the world to him.

'Bullshit,' Levi argued, a smile on his face, for as much he could move his mouth.

'Nope, it's the truth,' Erwin told him. Levi smiled for a second again. It was a comforting thought, as much as he didn't want to admit it.

Careful Erwin sat on the bed beside him, slipping in then and snaking his arm under his head, their bodies together as his face was against his neck. Levi was still hot, sweating but Erwin didn't mind.

Levi felt so clear as Erwin started to fall asleep behind him, pretty much asleep as soon as he laid down. There was so much he wanted to ask, about what was going on outside.

But deep down inside he knew it was almost better not know, to be grateful that he was still here and he laid here with Erwin.

Thank you so much for coming back to the story! I really hope you are enjoying this story. As for now, I am sticking to weekly updates, on Wednesdays.

I am really eager to know what you think about the story so please if you have the time and want to, leave a comment. It encourages me to keep posting the story and lets me know what you think! I hope you enjoy this read.