A/N: Something that was supposed to be filled with angst turned into something much more lighthearted and I am incredibly proud of how this turned out!

I haven't written HK in years and the fact that my love for them has been reignited is honestly such a great feeling. I've missed this ship and I am honored at the fact that I am once again creating content for them. It's like returning home lol!

But anyway, I'm done keeping you from the story.

Enjoy!

Missing

Not the poem about your absence, just a drawing, a crevice in the wall, something in the wind, a bitter taste.

—Alejandra Pizarnik

Winter seemed to arrive early this year.

Karin puffed warm air into her hands as she witnessed the first snowfall of the season. The cool breeze that nipped at her cheeks was cold and unforgiving. Cruel, in a sense. She doesn't remember the last time winter's bitter chill left her shivering.

She doesn't remember the last time she felt him this nearby.

It was a curse, truly, to be able to sense someone who refuses to let themselves be seen. The amount of times she had felt his reiatsu only for it to suddenly disappear shortly after had left her feeling like a fool. The hope she had of coming across an old friend had turned into resentment and regret. But it had been years since the Shinigami had a purpose for returning to the world of the living. The last battle they had fought ensured peace. Their victory allowed many to have secure futures.

She shouldn't be feeling as if something's missing.

Yet this familiar reiatsu has her thinking of a time when she felt complete— of a childhood filled with adventure and purpose— of a time when she had her own fateful encounter.

If she were to retell the story it would definitely pass as a fever dream. To say that she had met a boy with striking turquoise eyes and stark white hair was absurd. To mention that they fought dangerous spiritual monsters is insane— a mere fantasy of a child with colorful imagination.

This must be how Ichigo feels. She muses, knowing that her brother continues to wait for Rukia's return despite him denying ever missing her. It's quite pitiful, really, how he attempts to have a normal life. But he insists that he is fine and who is she to question him? Rukia is a part of his past and if he had decided to move on and relinquish his Shinigami identity then that is perfectly fine.

Now why can't she do the same?

Even now she finds herself following the spirit energy in hopes of seeing him, scolding herself for feeling such an intense need. You're an idiot, Karin. This has been the longest it had lingered, and she fears that it'll suddenly vanish without so much of a trace if she does not reach it in time.

With a deep breath, Karin continued to move forward, the temperature around her noticeably dropping with each step she took. Her surroundings had begun to have a thin layer of frost, and she wondered if he had been fighting the remaining hollows that had lingered after the war.

Then another daunting thought emerged; if she does happen to finally see him, what would she possibly say to him? How would she approach him? She anxiously bit her bottom lip as she tried to come up with an answer. A part of her imagines Toshiro behaving like a skittish cat, running away to avoid getting caught and another part of her knows that he will allow himself to be seen, if only to put her at ease.

It wasn't until she finally found him that her suspicions were confirmed. Something in her chest stirred as she observed the surroundings. The alleyway she had found him in was crystallized with ice, the remnants of the hollow had begun to deteriorate and standing in the center of it all was none other than Toshiro Hitsugaya. His back was turned to her and she was certain that he was aware of her presence but he made no motion to acknowledge her. She grimaced and allowed herself to observe him. He was taller, broad shouldered— it gave the illusion of a much more masculine frame from where she stood. It was blatantly clear that he was now a man and not the same boy she had last seen when she was thirteen yet she finds herself growing increasingly frustrated.

But is it possible to resent a man for keeping his distance? Of course it is. Karin had sworn to herself that she would no longer chase ghosts therefore Toshiro's sudden appearance should mean nothing to her. Yet her heart pounds against her chest and her hands itch to touch him, if only to make sure that he is real.

"How many times must I tell you not to concern yourself with me." He doesn't turn to look at her but he speaks in that same condescending tone he uses whenever he wants to get rid of her.

Karin grinned despite herself. There is a familiarity in his voice and it reminds her of her childhood. "Now when have I ever listened to you?" She bit back, ignoring the way her gut twisted when he finally faced her. Their eyes met, and her grin faltered. "It's good to see you, Toshiro."

Toshiro frowned, brows knitting together as his grip on the hilt of his sword tightened. Karin noticed his conflict, his body going rigid as he sized her up. "You've grown, Karin."

She swallowed thickly. "Ten years is a long time."

"You look well."

"So do you." They fall into an uncomfortable silence, it's tense, with neither of them knowing what to say. It had been made clear that Toshiro wasn't expecting her. The amount of times she dreamt of this moment was now real and everything she wanted to say to him remained in the back of her throat. "I thought those in the Soul Society didn't age."

She wanted to kick herself. A decade without seeing him and that was the first thing that came to mind. Her grip tightened on the grocery bags in her hand, suddenly remembering she was the one carrying tonight's dinner.

Toshiro sheathed his sword back onto his hip. He began to approach her slowly, the ice he had created crunching beneath his feet. When he exhaled, she could see his breath. "Does it surprise you?"

"Not at all." She lied, taking notice of the fact that he was now an entire head taller than her. She grimaced slightly at their sudden proximity, taking a step back in an attempt to calm her fluttering heart. "It's a shame I could no longer call you a grade schooler, though, it would've been a fun time."

And he smiled, a slight upward curve at the corner of his lips. He must be feeling quite proud of himself. Her inability to tease him must've been a huge boost to his ego. "I was never a grade schooler to begin with."

"Of course." She laughed. "You had the body of a child but the soul of an old man. Tell me, do you still like candied beans?"

"I enjoy them greatly."

"You hadn't changed."

"What is it that you want from me, Karin?"

"Why have you been avoiding me?" Straight to the point. Karin almost fears his answer but she was never one to avoid uncomfortable situations.

"Is that what you think I've been doing? Avoiding you?" He looked hurt by the accusation, disappointment flashing over his eyes as he took a step forward. "We both lead very different lives, Karin. I was doing you a favor."

"A favor?" Karin scoffed, "I have sensed you nearby on multiple occasions for years! Did you ever consider the fact that I wanted to see you?"

"Karin." The way he said her name sent a chill down her spine and it was then when she noticed how close they were. No longer a child, the man before her looked at her with longing. "You were the one who no longer wanted to see ghosts."

"Yes. The annoying ones." She cursed herself for how small she sounded. "You were not one of them."

To think that he would lump himself with the irritating spirits she comes across on a daily basis was infuriating. Everything she had experienced with him— the people she had met… Why in the world would she never want to see them again?

It was then when he reached for her, the distance between them non-existent. He embraced her tightly and in her surprise the groceries in her hand fell with a soft crunch. Having his arms around her felt familiar and her heart soared with the realization that he was holding her. "It was never my intention to make you believe you are not important to me…" he said and Karin clung to him, "…but I have missed you. More than you know."

"I hated you for it, you know." Her voice sounded muffled against his chest but she didn't care. He only held her tighter. "I resented you for allowing me to have a normal life."

He pulled her away slightly and really looked at her. Karin felt a breath escape her, never before noticing the beauty of his eyes and how much they resembled winter and ice. "You mean to tell me that you never wanted a normal life?"

"Ever since I met you, no." She said firmly, holding his gaze. "With people like my old man and Ichigo in my life, I was never going to have the peace I thought I wanted."

"You Kurosakis don't know the meaning of peace." He said fondly, stepping away to pick up the bag from the ground and handing it back to her. "It's not in your nature."

"Don't make us sound like animals." She laughed, stopping once she realized what was happening when he closed the distance again. "W-what are you doing?" She stammered as his hand lingered over her own for a minute too long, her cheeks flushing pink at the implication of the action itself.

Toshiro remained silent for a brief moment, simply choosing to look at her and Karin tried not to shift under his gaze. She swallowed thickly, opening her mouth to speak but he beat her to it.

"I'll come around more often." He said, letting go of her and suddenly she missed his warmth. "I won't allow you to miss me."

Her heart fluttered but a part of her believes to be dreaming. It would be better not to believe him, not to begin to hope. It would be far better just to accept reality and learn to live with it; She and Toshiro Hitsugaya lead very different lives and it'll be cruel to distract him from his responsibilities as a soul reaper.

But she knew that she wished to continue seeing him. That she must see him.

"Don't make promises you can't keep." She chastised.

Toshiro smiled. "I intend to keep my promise this time around, Karin."

And Karin was overwhelmed. She was filled with an emotion she dared not name for this was too good to be true. How can he sound so confident? And why was she allowing herself to feel these things for him? Time could change many things but the fact that her silly little crush from when she was thirteen remained has her feeling afraid. Afraid of what this could all mean. "Tell me you mean it."

The words left her mouth before she could stop them but Toshiro did not look the least bit surprised. He knows that she doubts him. It is not strange to doubt him. A decade of waiting does that to a person.

Tell me I mean something to you…

His hands were now on her shoulders, firmly holding her in place. "Stubborn as always." He smiled at her, a foreign expression on his face. She was so accustomed to seeing his scowl that she blinked in surprise. "I'm not the kind of man who makes meaningless promises. But I know my words alone will not be enough to convince you." He allowed his fingers to travel down the length of her arm and got a hold of her hand. He cupped it gently, a flash of white appearing, and suddenly her palm felt very cold.

When he released her, all that was present was a miniature ice sculpture of a dragon.

Karin lifted her gaze and steadily met his own. "An ice sculpture… just like the one you made for Yosuke."

Toshiro nodded. "Yes. But this one resembles Hyorinmaru, my Zanpakuto."

"It's beautiful."

"It's to show you that I've meant every word." He looked over his shoulder. A gate that reminded her of Urahara's shop entrance appeared behind him and she realizes that their time together has come to an end.

"When it melts, I will come." He cupped her cheek and she leaned into his touch. "This is goodbye. For now."

For now. There was a promise behind those words, and Karin allowed herself to drown in them— allowed herself to feel what she had denied herself all those years ago. "Until next time, Toshiro."

He nodded, letting go of her and Karin already missed his touch. She absently fiddled with the sculpture as the shoji doors closed, disappearing just as suddenly as they appeared, taking Toshiro with it.

She exhaled heavily, her attention returning to the dragon in her hand. When it melts… She examined it closely, wondering how long it'll take for it to melt completely. And she found herself smiling, almost holding in a giddy laughter as she walked home, the thought of Yuzu scolding her for taking so long was the least of her worries.

But she had missed him, it's true, and she will continue missing him but not like she had before.

This time… this time she will miss him with the promise of seeing him again.

And the void she had felt is filled.

Her fateful encounter remains.

When it melts, I will come.

Now she waits.