Chapter II
Mistakes Were Made
It was a beautiful morning. The sun was rising, the sky outside was clear, and I have an attractive teenage girl dressed in her pajamas in my arms.
One of those things is not like the others.
I chuckled silently to myself at the little joke, as I gazed out the bedroom window, which was extravagantly large and took up an entire wall. From here, I can see the residential area Mami's apartment block belonged to, and I watched as Japanese salarymen left their homes and apartments for work under the morning light. It was fascinating to watch how city folks get to work. As an American living out in the suburbans, taking my car was my default option, so seeing folks take the public bus was incredibly novel for me. It reminded me of my college days when I had to take the bus in order to reach the college campus for classes.
I didn't get a wink of sleep last night, but that's alright. I'll live. Making sure that the girl in my arms didn't get another nightmare was more important. It was... quite a peaceful experience, with only a silent apartment and our synchronized breathing and heartbeats to listen to. It reminded me of when I went to Eucharistic adoration. I supposed it also helped that I wasn't distracted by my smartphone the entire time.
I felt Mami unconsciously snuggled closer to me, her cheeks brushing aside my necklaces, the crucifix and the scapular, and my attention turned away from the windows back to the girl in my arms. Mami's head have fallen down from my neck to pressing her cheeks against my chest, while her body have shifted from sitting on my laps to sprawling on top of me on her bed. My chin was resting protectively over on top of Mami's head. One of my hands gently stroked through her hair, which had become freed from its Ojousama-style drill curls while she slept and now flowed down her back as a long and messy curtain of golden threads, while the other was wrapped around Mami and holding her close to me. And I felt and heard as Mami drew in one long steady breath, and then let it out as a sigh filled with contentment. My heart melted at the sound, and I pressed her closer to me.
The emotions that bubbled in my chest were fundamentally platonic and brotherly in nature. A young and pretty girl had draped herself over me while I was dressed in only an undershirt and boxers, and the first thought burning in my mind was not How do I deal with this raging erection? but instead, How can I help this poor girl?
I have no idea. I'm not a therapist. Or a psychologist. The best I have right now is to simply be there for her, but I don't know if that will be enough.
...But it's better than nothing.
An alarm clock, placed on top of a nightstand next to Mami's bed, suddenly started ringing. I flinched in surprise at the sudden noise, and I quickly silenced it, before it could awaken my host.
Too late. I watched as Mami slowly stirred awake. Her hands, which were wrapped around my waist in an embrace while she slept, snaked their way out from behind my back to my abdomen, and Mami pushed against me to sit up. I let her go and dropped my hands down to my side. At the same time, her legs wrapped themselves around my own. When she pushed herself up, it left her straddling my thighs on her knees and her butt resting on top of my knees. Mami stretched out her arms and let out a long sleepy yawn. It made her look absolutely adorable.
I felt my lips quirked into a smirk as I beheld a sleepy and cute Mami, her blond hair free and cascading down her back in a messy mane, straddling me in her pajamas, with the top buttons undone and exposing her cleavage. She still hasn't noticed our compromising position. Oh, this is going to be funny.
Mami finally drooped back down from her stretching and dropped her hands down to my boxers, resting them haphazardly near my groin. She blew a lock of hair out of her face and blinked her eyes a few times - and then she finally noticed me.
She froze. Her golden eyes locked onto me and widened with shock. I stared right back, still smirking and with amusement dancing in my eyes. I watched as her eyes slowly trailed down my body, Mami soaking in the details. From my face down to my chest, dressed in a white undershirt. Her eyes lingered on my crucifix and scapular for a moment, before they continued their descent down my body. From my chest to my abdomen. From my abdomen to my black silk boxers. Her eyes finally stopped when she noticed she's straddling my thighs and the dangerous position of her hands.
Her hands squeezed my flesh softly. Her eyes flashed right back to mine, wide with horror. I quirked an amused eyebrow at her, my smirk still in place.
Mami's face flushed scarlet, and she quickly scrambled away from me with a yelp. She stopped at the other side of her bed and wrapped her arms around herself protectively, her eyes staring at me in a cocktail of shock, surprise, embarrassment, and fear.
My smirk morphed into a grin, and I chuckled to myself, enjoying Mami's reaction... probably a bit too much then I should be, honestly. In my defense, her face was hilarious! I propped myself against the bed headrest. "Good morning, Miss Tomoe." I greeted. "Did you sleep well?"
Mami blinked and paused at my words. She sat up on the bed and looked down at the sheets, clearly pondering on when was the last time she had a good night's rest. "I..." She said slowly, surprise creeping into her voice. "I think I did, actually."
Huh. It must have been a really long time, then, if she's actually surprised. My eyes softened with pity, and my face became somber. "Good." I finally said. "That's good."
I rotated myself to the side of the bed and planted my feet on the ground. I stretched out my arms and spine with a groan, trying to get out the kinks in my back from sitting up for so long. I felt a little fatigued, but it was nothing I couldn't handle. Missing a single night's rest isn't going to kill me.
"Sorry about showing up in your bed and holding you without permission," I said as I stretched. "You were having a nightmare, and it felt rude to leave-"
I stopped when two arms suddenly wrapped themselves around my chest, and I felt two large mounds of flesh and a face pushed into my back. I became acutely aware of Mami, as she pressed her body against my back. Of the feel of her body against my own. Of her heat spreading through the thin fabrics of our sleepwear. Heat rushed through my face, my heart quickened its beat, and I broke out in cold sweats at her touch.
I swallowed. I was holding her just fine a second ago! Why's my body so agitated now?!
But this felt different from before. Last night, I was trying to comfort an orphaned girl from her nightmares. This, however, feels... different. More personal.
More intimate.
More desperate.
"Mami?" I asked nervously.
"Did you mean it?" Mami whispered. "What you said?" Last night, I could almost hear her say.
I paused at the note of what sounded like desperation in her voice, and I took a moment to form my answer.
"Mami," I said carefully, "I don't know what, exactly, happened to you or your parents. But everything I said, I said only what a loving father would say."
"How would you know, then?" Mami asked quietly. "What makes you so-"
"Mami." I interrupted softly. "I know. Because no parents want to bury their child."
Mami's breath hitched. "I-I've always thought-" She began to say, but then she cut herself off. "Do you... do you think my parents love me?"
Pity poured into my heart. I placed a hand over on top of one of Mami's hands and gave her a squeeze. "Always."
A finger idly brushed against the yellow gemstone set inside the silver ring on her middle finger. Her Soul Gem - I assumed - glimmered with a soft inner light. There were no imperfections that I saw that stained her Soul Gem. It also felt warm to my touch. Mami shuddered at my brief touch.
My eyes widened with horror as I realized what I just did. I quickly withdrew my finger away from Mami's Soul Gem.
Her hands grasped the fabric of my undershirt in a tight grip, and Mami squeezed me against her body. I swallowed nervously as my face continued to burn at the close and quite intimate physical contact, and I am uncomfortably reminded that a girl is embracing me while I am still technically in my underwear. I pointedly made sure to ignore the tent my boxer was pitching. Mami burrowed her nose into my back and let in a deep breath.
"I... Thank you." She breathed into my back.
I squeezed her hand again in response.
We stood there together for quite some time on the bed, with me sitting on the edge while Mami held me close in her arms and rubbed her cheeks against my back. A bit too close, I'm beginning to feel like. And as seconds dragged out into minutes, for far too long as well.
I mean, I knew Mami's been starved of affection, but this is beginning to feel a bit too fast and inappropriate, even for me! We're technically still strangers! It hasn't even been a full day yet!
I tapped Mami's hand with a finger a couple of times. "So..." I finally said, "I don't suppose you can let me go?"
Her hold on me somehow managed to tighten even further. "Why?" She asked, and I went still when I heard a tone of fear in her voice. "Is something wrong?"
"Nothing's wrong." I instantly assured her. "It's just-" I took a quick glance at the alarm clock. "-it's almost 7:15 in the morning. Don't you have school to prepare for?"
Mami relaxed at my words. "Oh. Don't scare me like that, you baka." She said with clear relief, and I can almost hear her smile. "School break just started. School doesn't start again until next Wednesday, on the 23rd."
"Huh." I... don't exactly remember the canon timeline for Madoka Magica, just a rough chronological sequence of events. Still, that's good information to know. It might come in handy later. "What's today's date, then?"
"It's Thursday, March 17th." She told me.
"Ah." I waited for a moment, for Mami to finally let me go.
Then another moment. And then a third. But Mami still shown no signs of letting me go anytime soon.
Dread began pooling in my stomach.
Just as I was about to ask again, Mami spoke up. "Hari-san?"
"Yes, Mami?" I answered.
Mami shifted herself around a bit. "Can you... cuddle with me?" She asked hesitantly. "Just for a little longer?"
"I..." I was just as hesitant. Comforting Mami with her trauma was quite fine with me, apparently. But this offer, for some reason, was making me nervous. "Are you sure?"
"Please?" She begged me.
And I... couldn't find it in myself to say no.
My face was still burning; my heart was still racing; and I could feel the sweat gathering in my hands. Nervous energy filled my body, but guilt clawed at my thoughts. I shouldn't be feeling like this. Not to Tomoe Mami, who invited me into her apartment. Not to a middle school girl who is braver than me, stronger than me, and younger than me. She deserved more than just this man almost a decade her senior getting excited by her touch. She deserved better than me.
But she doesn't have anyone, does she?
I found myself staring down at the crucifix hanging down from my neck. I refused to acknowledge the tent my arousal was making in my boxers right behind and below my crucifix. And for a split second, I could have almost sworn that the miniature form of Christ Crucified was watching me. Judging me.
...Is this not the right thing to do, Lord?
But I received no answer.
Is it?
I... don't know.
But it is the best she has.
And so I swallowed my hesitation, and I... accepted her offer.
"Okay." I answered softly.
And I allowed Mami to drag me back into her bed. And when I'm back laying down on the bedsheets, I turned myself around to face Mami, and I saw her face blushing a deep shade of red, framed by her radiant and untamed mane of yellow hair, and her golden eyes sparkling with clear joy. I wrapped my arms around Mami, and I pulled close her to me. I felt the sensation when her breasts squeezed against my chest and her arms wrapped themselves around me. I basked in the warmth of her body as Mami pressed herself into me and I into her. I breathed in the scent of her body - she smelled like some kind of floral perfume, but I had never really paid any attention to the smell of flowers before, so I can't really tell the difference. And I enjoyed the silken feel of her hair as I stroke through Mami's hair of gold, while she laid her head under my chin and snuggled closer to me.
And I felt and heard as Mami drew in one long steady breath, and then let it out as a long sigh filled with contentment. "Thank you." She whispered to me. My heart burned with pride, pride in that somehow, I was able to comfort this girl, if even only a little bit.
But it also burned with another, more heavy emotion.
Shame.
"You're welcome." I whispered back.
And so I laid on a teenage girl's bed, cuddling with a lonely magical girl in my arms and a heavy heart in my chest.
...Now, how the Hell am I supposed to deal with my raging boner?
[HAROLD]
The answer, apparently, was to ignore it and try to get some sleep.
Which was easier than I expected, since I stayed up all night long, watching over Mami. So when I closed my eyes, I went out like a light.
And so I slept. I dreamed.
And then I woke up to the alien feel of someone tenderly touching my face while I slept. I opened my eyes, and I saw Mami laying down beside me, her head resting on top of my right arm and the top of her pajama shirt still unbuttoned and partly exposing her cleavage. A gentle smile graced her face, and her golden eyes was staring into me and filled with a soft tenderness. Her right hand was brought up to my face, and a finger slowly traced the edge of my jaw.
When Mami saw that I was awake, her eyes sparkled, her smile got a bit wider, and her hand replaced her finger, and she caressed my jaw, with a thumb stroking my cheeks.
"Good morning, Hari-kun." She said to me.
I blinked in mute surprise. My heartbeat got a bit faster. And I did what I felt was natural.
I leaned into her touch, and I closed my eyes as I enjoyed the warmth and feel of her hand cupping my face. I felt my lips turn into a gentle smile, and I opened my eyes again to watch the girl who took me in. Mami brightened even further.
A bad idea? Probably. Reciprocating Mami's feelings is not healthy for her. She is young, and inexperienced, and vulnerable, and without parents to help guide her. I don't know how she might respond to me, but I doubt it will anywhere remotely healthy.
But... it's not like I have a lot of options. Or time. The entire plotline of Madoka Magica takes place inside a single month. If Mami doesn't ultimately trust me, I fear she will end up either dead or worse.
...And I won't lie and say a part of it isn't motivated by this warm feeling in my chest. To wake up to the face of an attractive girl who is clearly happy to be with me. To be touched by a girl with such clear tender affection.
It's... nice.
Not good, but nice.
...We really need to have a talk about this. About us.
"Good morning, Mami." I answered.
And then we lapsed into an awkward silence, as we stared into each other's eyes.
Fuck. I am really not in a good position to talk about all... this right now.
So, I turned my face away from Mami and sat up. Mami followed me. Her hand that was caressing my face slipped down to resting on my chest, while Mami leaned against my right arm, resting her head on my shoulders, and slipped a hand into mine. We shared a look. She squeezed my hand, and I squeezed back, still with a smile on my face.
It was... nice.
Then I heard Mami gave a small gasp. I gave her a glance, but she was looking down at my boxers, with a hand covering her mouth. I followed her gaze, and heat rushed into my face.
My dick - somehow! - managed to escape through the fly of my boxers, and it now stood proud and erect in full public view. For Tomoe Mami to see.
Needless to say, I was mortified.
"Oh my!" I shouted as I bolted from the bed, slipping from Mami's loose hold. "Look at the time! Gotta go!"
I fled the scene and went down the spiral staircase, ignoring Mami's panicked cries of "Hari?!" as I went. I grabbed my clothes by the futon before I slipped inside the bathroom. I swiftly stripped off my clothes and hopped in the shower, and I quickly turned on the shower head.
And then I crouched down in the bathtub as the water poured down on my naked body, head in my hands, and I silently screamed to myself, my face still burning bright red after... after... that!
FuuuUUUUUUCK! Goddammit, FUCK! That was humiliating! Why?! Why now?! And in front of Tomoe Mami?!
-the feel of her body against my own, the sensation of her breasts pressed up against my chest, the sound of-
I flinched at the sudden intrusion of a memory and quickly banished it from my mind. Uncomfortable emotions I did not to acknowledge boiled and steamed deep within my chest. Worry. Lust. Pride and pity warring with guilt and shame.
As I tried to grapple with my confused emotions, my eyes found themselves staring down at my still erect penis.
A thought struck me. Fuck. I used to fap to Mami hentai.
My penis twitched at the memory. I snarled and clenched my fists, half in impotent fury and half in disgust, but all aimed at myself.
"Hari?" Mami's voice suddenly interrupted my thoughts. "Are you in there?"
Fuck. Mami.
"Yes, Mami?" I asked.
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry for looking at... that. I didn't mean to." Mami's voice was filled with fear and uncertainty, and she sounded like she was about to break into tears. "But please... Please don't leave me."
Guilt stabbed at me. Shit. Mami. I fucked up.
I should have known better. I am twenty-three years old. I am the adult here. I should have had my shit together. But I didn't. I got scared and embarrassed, and I ran away from a young girl who I knew had abandonment issues. And in doing so, I hurt her.
I dragged my hands down my face. Fuuuck.
"Give me a sec, Mami." I called out to her, my voice defeated. "I'll be right there."
I fucked up. Now I gotta fix it. I sucked in a deep breath and then let it out as a sigh. It helped me, a little, to calm my nerves and give me focus and control over my boiling emotions I still don't fully understand. I took all of my guilt, all of my shame, and all of my lust, stuffed them all inside a little black box, and then shoved it aside for later. Mami first, cringe at myself later.
I stood up from the bathtub floor, and I quickly scrubbed myself down, washed it all off, and then turned the shower head off. I stepped out of the shower, grabbed a towel off a rack, and began drying myself off. After finishing with that, I shimmied into my clothes, took my medicine, and then finally emerged from the bathroom. It must have been the fastest shower I have ever taken.
And found myself face to face with a tear-stricken and fidgeting Mami, still disheveled with her messy mane of yellow hair down and still dressed in her pajamas with her cleavage exposed, waiting right outside the bathroom door. My treacherous eyes dipped down to ogle the bared flesh of her breasts, but I forced them back up to stare into her weeping eyes. She saw me, and for a split second, I saw happiness in her eyes, only for fear and hesitation to quickly replace them.
Guilt stabbed at me again.
"Hari?" Mami asked uncertainly.
Wordlessly, I stepped up to Mami and enveloped her in an embrace. Mami stiffened for a moment before she clung to me desperately.
"I'm sorry," I whispered to her.
"No-no-no, I'm the-" Mami tried to interrupt me, but I pressed on.
"It was embarrassing, I got scared, and I overreacted." I said quietly, and Mami stopped to listen to my words. "I made a mistake. I ran away. And in doing so, I hurt you. I'm sorry. Can you forgive me?"
Mami bawled in my arms. I held her, stroking her golden hair and ignoring the pleasant sensations of her bosom pressed against me, and I whispered comforting nonsense to her ears while she cried.
"Promise me, Hari," Mami begged me through her tears. "Please, promise you will never leave me. I don't have anyone left, Hari, except for you. If you leave me, I think I will die. So please, promise me."
It broke my heart to see Mami like this, so scared and lonely and desperate.
"I swear by the Blood of Christ," I answered her, a deep growl in my voice, "I will never abandon you, Mami."
And Mami wept. Her legs lost their strength, but I caught her, and I slowly brought the both of us down to the ground, where I sat down and Mami clung to me. And I held onto Mami as she babbled to me through her tears, saying "Arigatou" and "I'm sorry" over and over again, while I rocked her back and forth on the floor and hummed comforting noises.
But eventually, mercifully, Mami finally calmed down and quietened her tears. She took in a deep breath, and she released it as a long sigh filled with peace and tranquility. And Mami finally relaxed in my arms, with her head resting underneath my chin.
"You feeling better now?" I asked softly as I stroked her hair.
"Hai." She answered me.
I hummed in response, and I waited for Mami to finally be comfortable enough to let me go.
And waited.
And waited.
...I'm beginning to think Mami is never going to let me go. Shit.
I heaved a disappointed sigh. "Alright," I said. "That's enough. Time to get up, Mami."
Mami tightened her hold on me in response. "No, I don't want to." I'd imagine that if I could see her face, I would see her pouting.
I looked up at the sun through the massive corner-wall slash window Mami's apartment had. Almost absentmindedly, an idle thought slithered through my mind at the sight of the bizarre window. Seriously, what is up with that? Why is that even a thing? "It's almost noon, Mami." I said. "You need to get dressed. Besides, it's your turn to take a shower now."
I can't tell shit. I need a clock to tell me the precise time. Otherwise, if I just rely on the sky to tell me what time it is, all I get is a rough guess of morning, daytime, evening, or nighttime. I'm just guesstimating based upon the fact that it was 7 o'clock when Mami first woke up.
Mami paused at the last sentence. "You're not going to run away again, are you?" She asked me, trepidation in her voice.
I nuzzled her face. "I promised you, didn't I?"
Mami nuzzled me back. "Okay." She said softly. She reluctantly let go of me and rose to her feet.
I watched as Mami went up the staircase, stealing glances at me as she go, before she finally disappeared to her bedroom, probably to grab her clothes. Then I rose to my own feet, went over to the couch, and sat down. Sure enough, Mami soon came back down, carrying a bundle of clothes... that I recognized from yesterday.
"Aren't you on a school break?" I asked Mami, confused. "Why are you getting changed into your school uniform?"
Mami flushed. "Sorry, force of habit. I don't have many other outfits."
My eyes softened. Oh. Wow. That's just sad.
Mami paused at the bathroom doorway and turned back to stare at me with a complicated expression on her face. I stared back expectedly, waiting for her to voice what was on her mind.
"Yes, Mami?" I asked gently. "Do you need something?"
Mami stared at me for a second, and then a smile slowly graced her lips and her eyes became tender and gentle. Mami shook her head. "It's... nothing." She finally said. Mami slipped inside the bathroom, closing the door behind her, and I soon heard the sound of running water.
I blinked and raised an eyebrow at that. Huh. Okay then.
Now I finally have some privacy and time to think and grapple with my emotions.
I felt the tension leave my shoulders as I finally allowed myself to relax, and I collapsed on Mami's couch. "Fuuuck." I groaned, as my hand massaged the bridge of my nose.
So. I think I can confidently say that our initial starting relationship as guest and host has since... escalated a bit. It is clear to me that Mami has become incredibly attached to me. I have shelter, and I have connection to an important character. I managed to complete step one of my initial objective.
I got what I set out to do, so why do I feel so scummy and so ashamed of myself?
A memory of Mami's voice, filled with grief and loneliness and desperation, slithered into my mind. "Please don't leave me."
Guilt and shame stabbed me in the throat.
Because... I am taking advantage of her.
I am taking advantage of a young and pretty girl, who is alone, clearly traumatized, and who has no parents or guardian to watch out for her. I am taking advantage of her hospitality, her kindness, and her vulnerability in order to benefit myself. Do I have the best of intentions? Yes, but it is all based on the assumption that a Japanese anime I have watched is actually accurate and real. And, to be fair, that is a very shady reason to begin with.
And I am definitely sexually interested in Mami. Already, I can clearly see how if Mami had trusted the wrong person, if she didn't choose me... the very thought made me nauseous.
That thought sparked a fire inside of me, a wrathful anger aimed at the lustful feelings I harbor and at myself for feeling them. I hunched over myself and clenched my fists in impotent rage, and I snarled at myself.
I hate this. Why am I like this?! I am twenty-three years old! Mami's, what, sixteen? She's also a magical child-soldier who've fought against literal monsters all by herself. I shouldn't be feeling like this to her! I admire Mami. I look up to her. She's pretty. She's brave. She's so incredibly lonely, and yet she still tries to put up a brave face for others, even while she is still hurting inside from grief and trauma.
But it was just that. An admiration, for a fictional character that was, ultimately, not real. Until she wasn't.
But now she is, for some Godforsaken reason. She invited me into her apartment. She made me dinner. She gave me a place to sleep for the night. And when she was suffering from PTSD and nightmares... I comforted her. And now she's became incredibly attached to me, because I was there when she had nobody else.
And then I almost fucked it all up. All because she saw my naked dick.
My rage turned to shame, and my fists were released. I palmed my face, and I cringed at the memory out of sheer embarrassment.
My mind then turned to Mami, and embarrassment transformed into worry and fear. Not for myself, but for Mami.
And I'm... scared. Because I'm no-one special. I'm just... me. A shy loser with very few friends and who dropped out of college. The disappointing middle child out of seven children who had never been in a relationship before. Two of my siblings are officers in the military. Two of my sisters are in the National Guard. My younger brother is actually doing well in college. And my youngest brother is planning to enlist as soon as he finishes high school. And I can't join him, and at least make something out of myself, because of my liver transplant.
And Mami, bright, beautiful, brave Mami, got attached to me. Me, the most expensive disappointment of my family. An electrical technician in a family of doctors, engineers, and soldiers. A scared and vulnerable young girl picked me, due to stupid fucking luck.
And I... I don't want to take advantage of her. I'm not a bad person. That's not who I am or who I want to be.
I took in a deep breath and let it out. So, I need to become the best man that Mami needs, for her own sake. Because if I don't, who will? Certainly not fuckin' Kyubey, that's for damned sure.
So. Yeah. We need to talk. About us. About this relationship we have, and what boundaries we will set.
Because I fear if we don't, my relationship with Mami will easily turn toxic and unhealthy for her, and that is not what she needs right now. Mami needs help. Mami needs affection, compassion, and my emotional support. Mami needs to know that she is not alone, that the sacrifices she made was not in vain, and that I will always be there for her, no matter what.
Even if she is a magical girl.
Even if she is secretly fighting monsters under the moonlight.
Even if she can become a Witch.
Because Mami, at least, deserves to have a happy ending. They all do.
I heard the bathroom door finally creaked open, putting an end to my thoughts. I sat up from my introspection and turned to face the door. "Hey, Mami-" I began to say. And then I saw her.
I froze, my eyes wide with shock and my face burning bright red, and my words died a sudden and strangled death.
A blushing Mami emerged nervously from the bathroom, her golden hair still drenched and dripping with water.
But that was not the reason why I froze like a fear-struck rabbit.
No, it was the fact that Mami was clothed in only a bathroom towel wrapped around her body and held in place by her hands. A towel that only barely covered from her bosom down to her loins, which still left an ample amount of her cleavage exposed and almost all of her nice, long, and athletic legs bared for me to see.
I swallowed nervously as Mami slowly walked up to me, my eyes tracking her movement and drinking in every single moment, while my panicking heart hammered away against my chest. How the lower edge of the towel adjusted and shifted from the movement of her nice, long, and graceful legs. How her barely covered and bountiful breasts caused the fabric to strain and twist, which only served to accentuate her chest even further. How the yellow gemstone, her Soul Gem, on the silver ring she wore on her middle finger gleamed under the Sun with the light of her very soul. How my eyes wandered over her exposed collarbones, traced over her bared neck, and admired the structure of her chin. How they stared, distractedly, at her soft red lips, and at her pink tongue when it slipped out and nervously moistened her lips, before they climbed up her cute nose to meet her glowing yellow eyes, and how nervousness, hope, and joy all seemed to blend together in her eyes. How her wet golden hair, still dripping with water droplets, seemed to dance and shimmer in the sunlight.
She stole my breath away.
I have always noted that Mami was an incredibly pretty girl, but it was only now, at this moment, did I personally and intimately understand what the word breathtakingly beautiful mean. There is only one other girl I could describe in the same breath as I would describe Mami right now, and that belonged to an old and distant classmate back in elementary school, who was an extraordinary beauty even in Junior High. But even she did not bared herself like Mami is doing to me right now.
My pants felt way too tight for my loins.
Somehow, the handful of moments it took for her to cross from the bathroom door to me felt like an eternity to me. But, blessedly, finally, she stood in front of me, looking down at me, still blushing, twirling a wet lock of hair, and the scent of fresh flowers clinging to her.
"Mami?" I asked worriedly, not trusting the sudden wellspring of emotions I'm feeling right now.
Mami placed a finger on my lips. "Shh, Hari," She shushed me, "Relax. Please. You have already done so much for me."
A quiet thought whispered to me, I barely did anything, but I kept my tongue, not trusting myself to speak at this moment. Seeing this, Mami slowly dragged her finger down my lips to my chin. Shivers went down my spine at her touch. When her finger reached the end of my chin, she removed it with a flick.
"You... you have already done so much for me." Mami began again, but this time her voice was filled with deep and complicated emotions: joy was clearly there, as well as wonder, but there was also uncertainty in her voice, as well as longing, and desire, and so much more. "You comforted me. You listened to me. You were there for me. I never thought I would feel safe, just inside your arms. I never thought I would feel so much joy and happiness at your touch. It has been so long, that I have forgotten what it feels like. And I realize now... I can't live without it. Your touch. Your comfort. Your voice. I can't live without you. And I realize that there is nothing I have to make up for all the things you have done for me."
"Nothing..." Mami trailed off, and she awkwardly shifted about and turned her head to the side, away from me, embarrassed. Her eyes of bright gold glanced at me. Something she saw in me clearly emboldened her, and Mami straightened up and turned her head back to face me. "Except for me."
"So... Please, let me pay you back, at least a little." Mami whispered to me, her eyes boring into me desperately, "Please, let me take care of you."
Slowly, self-consciously, Mami opened the towel, baring herself utterly and entirely to me.
A small gasp escaped my lips.
She was beautiful. Oh, she was so achingly beautiful.
Her body glistened in the sunlight, still wet from the water droplets that still clung to her figure and slowly, almost sensually, flowed down her naked body. My virgin eyes raked all over the exposed body of this nubile young girl, as if to burn every second I can spare into my memory. Her breasts were two large globes of flesh, being big but not too big, capped by pink and erect nipples. Her stomach was smooth and taut, with the barest semblance of muscles beneath the skin, and it flew down and widened out at the waistline, where her body seemed fit to fill out into a pair of womanly hips pleasing to my eye. The pubic hair in her loins was freshly shaved, leaving her nether region to stand before me wet and bare for my eyes to see, while... liquids flowed into and dripped down from the lips of her womanhood.
Mami allowed the towel to slip from her fingers and slid down to the floor, leaving her entirely and utterly naked before me. Her golden eyes stared down at me. Smouldering. Yearning. Willingly. Offering herself to me.
Temptation beckoned.
Something inside of me changed, right then. A spark was struck, and it found fertile fodder in my churning emotions, barely held in check by my fears. The spark fell on the smouldering embers of my bottled lust, and it ignited. A great fire erupted within me, and I burned. It burned away my anxiety and my fears like a raging firestorm and chased away my guilt and my shame from my mind like the hounds of hellfire. It quickly spread throughout my body, and it consumed me, mind, body, and soul.
My posture shifted. My eyes relaxed, no longer held wide by shock and terror, but now smoldering with lustful desire. My fear still lingered, but it was subdued, lesser now.
I wanted her. Oh, how I burned to have her.
"Do..." Mami whispered to me, "Do you like this, Hari?"
A deep guttural growl rumbled out from my throat. "I do."
I liked it. I liked it alot. And I wanted more.
But I kept my hands to myself. Even with my lust boiling over and my fears suppressed, my fears still held me back. Too scared to take it, but too entranced to look away.
A smile graced Mami's face, and she stepped up to me. She's so close, she's almost brushing against me.
I wanted her. She's so close, just within my arm's reach. I could just...
But I did not.
Two hands cupped both sides of my face. If the sight of a naked Mami was like a spark, her touch was like a torch. Her hands seared right through my skin, to my mouth, down my throat, and consumed by the waiting flame burning inside of me. The fire of lust exploded to new heights, from a raging fire into an inferno. It roared through my veins with wicked glee, and it bellowed out to me its wants, its needs, its demands with wild abandon.
But I did not heed them.
Mami raised my head to face hers. She beamed down at me, her hair shining like a radiant halo in the sunlight and her eyes burning bright gold. A pink tongue slipped out and wetted her lovely red lips.
Oh, God. She was so beautiful. My lust screamed out its agreement, and it cried out for release.
But I did not listen.
But I did not resist, either.
Mami leaned down.
I closed my eyes.
Our lips touch.
She tasted like cherries.
My lips caught on fire. It raced through my mouth, down my throat, and into the furious furnace blazing with wild abandon.
And I finally gave in.
My hands reached out and grasped Mami by the hips, and I pulled her onto my laps. Mami's hands traveled to the back of my head and grabbed my hair, and she used her leverage to deepen our kiss. She pressed her body flush against my own, which pushed me against the back of the couch, and she shifted herself around until she was straddling my laps, which did wonderful things to my burning loins. My hands slid up over her bare back, her skin wet and warm to my touch, causing Mami to shudder and breathe out a pleasant little moan against my lips, and they traveled up her spine until they grasped her by the back of her head and by the nape of her neck, keeping her lips locked onto mine.
And I lost myself to this beautiful, wet, naked, nubile, and willing young girl on my laps. To the sensations of her breasts and her body pressed up against me. To the feel of her wet skin and soaked hair under my hands and of her hands locked over mine. To the heat of her skin that burned me through my clothes. To the heavy scent of her perfume and how it wafted through my nose. To the wild jolts of pleasure where she ground the lips of her maidenhood against my loins. To the delightful taste of cherries on her lips.
For my first kiss, it was the best I could have ever asked for.
Eventually, however, our lips were forced to separate. We drew back a bit, and I stared into Mami's brilliant eyes as my lungs drew in short and excited gasps of breath. Mami stared back down at me, her lips curling in a bright smile, her yellow eyes dancing with clear delight, and her chest letting out eager little pants. I found myself smiling in return.
No words were spoken between us. There was no need to. Mami closed the distance, and our lips met again. My lips burned again. I welcomed it. I reveled in it.
And as I kissed this beautiful, delightful, and wonderful girl straddling me, I could not help but feel the flickers of doubt slithering in my mind. No... nobody can blame me for this, right? It's not my fault if a naked girl throws herself at me. Right?
A quiet whisper chimed in at the back of my mind. My parents would, it said.
Ice filled my veins and broke through the haze of my lust. Mom and Dad are going to kill me.
I pulled back from our kiss, but Mami followed my lips and captured them again. I tore them away from her delicious, lovely, and oh so tempting lips.
"Mami," I pleaded. "Please. Stop."
Mercifully, Mami stopped. She pulled back and looked down at me. She looked so scared and afraid. Instead of a wet, naked, and nubile young girl straddling my lap, I saw a scared and desperate Mami. It broke my heart, and that helped me to suppress the fire of my lust and keep it down.
"Hari?" She asked me. "What's wrong?"
"We need to stop." I begged her. "We can't do this. This isn't right."
Mami looked at me with eyes full of terror. But before I could react, it passed, and Mami looked at me with a lustful smirk. Her hands came down from my hair to grip my shoulders. She wiggled her hips, and I let out a groan of pleasure as Mami ground her maidenhood against my raging loins.
"This," She purred, as she rubbed her lower lips against my burning manhood trapped beneath my pants, "Says otherwise."
That stung me.
My hands dashed out and caught her arms. Mami went still and stared at me, her eyes wide with shock and panic, while mine glowered back with anger and wounded pride.
"I," I growled out, "Am more than my lust. I am more than my own self-pleasure. I can control myself. I can control my own emotions. I can have self-discipline."
With every word I spoke, I clawed back more and more of my focus and my will from the wild grip of my raging lust. I closed my eyes and conducted a breathing exercise to help bring order back to my mind raging wild with my lust, breath by slow breath. And then with all of my focus and willpower I managed to claw back, I shaped them into the mental appearance of a mace. I grabbed the apparition of my own will and then proceeded to mentally bludgeon my lust back into compliance.
It was not quick. It was not easy. My lust screamed its defiance against me and lashed out, trying to make me lose control over myself. It shoved my memories of Mami back into the forefront of my mind. Memories of beautiful, wet, naked, and nubile Mami. How her hair framed her head, shimmering and dancing under the light of the Sun. How her breasts jostled and shivered with every step. How water droplets clung to her figure. How her eyes gleamed with golden light. How her Soul Gem burned with the light of her soul. The feel of her body against my own. The sensation of her breasts pressed flush against my chest. The heat of her skin. The scent of her perfume. The taste of her lips. The pleasure her maidenhood gave my loins.
And then it offered me sweet, glorious temptations in the forms of illusions of what could have been, if I only reached out and take it. Of the pleasure her naked body could give me. Of how she would scream my names with lust and delight as I take her. Of how I would have a beautiful, nubile, and submissive young girl utterly devoted to me and dependent on me, to take whenever I want, to mold into whatever delight I see fit. And Mami would offer it all to me with a smile on her face. To become my Mami. My Mami, and no one else's. All mine. Mine. Mine.
And wouldn't it be wonderful?
My lust tried to overwhelm me with the sheer weight of the emotions and pleasures and delights I had but a taste of.
But I was prepared this time. Against the avalanche of wild and untamed sensations, I drew up a single memory, and I held onto it with all of my strength. Of Mami, looking at me with golden eyes filled with fear, misery, and loneliness. Of Mami, who cried out her grief in my arms. Of Mami, and the vow I swore to her before God and to myself. Of Mami, and the worry, the fears, and... yes, the love I felt in my heart for her.
It was more than enough.
I opened my eyes and stared at Mami with clear eyes.
Mami stared right back. Tears were streaking from her eyes, and she was shaking like a leaf. Her mouth was open, but no words came out.
I enveloped her in a hug.
"Shhh," I whispered into her ears. "It's going to be okay. It's alright. I'm not going to leave you, Mami."
Mami clung to me desperately. She buried her head into my chest, and her body trembled like a leaf in my arms. But no cry came from her lips. No words were spoken. And I whispered comforting nonsense into her ears as I stroked her hair, as I focused my full attention on comforting Mami, while she clung to me like a drowning woman.
But eventually, mercifully, Mami finally stopped trembling, and a silence settled between us.
"What did I do wrong?" Mami finally said, her voice almost a whisper. "Am I not beautiful enough for you?"
"You are the most beautiful girl I have ever known." I immediately assured her.
"Then why?" She almost cried out. "Why am I not good enough for you?"
I took a moment to formulate a proper response. "Because... it's too much." I finally answered, and anguish filled my voice. "I barely did anything, and we don't know each other. Not truly. It hasn't even been a day, Mami, and yet you're offering yourself to me. It's too much. It's too great. I don't deserve this."
Mami immediately pulled back and stared at me, her eyes filled with so much complicated emotions. A hand caressed my face. "Yes, you do." Mami whispered.
I placed my hand over hers. "No, I don't." I said, smiling sadly.
"But I want this." She pleaded.
"And I can't accept this." I replied.
Mami laid her head down on my chest again, and I wrapped my arms around her. For a moment, silence settled in between us.
"I just... don't want you to leave me." Mami said softly. "Is that too much to ask for?"
"And I gave you my word that I will never abandon you." I answered. "Is my word not good enough for you?"
Mami visibly flinched. I squeezed her closer to me.
A silent moment passed between us. And an idea lit up in my head.
A bad one. A horrible one, really. But Mami needs an answer now, and I don't have time to find the perfect one.
I reached out and cupped her face with a hand, and I tilted her head to look at me. Mami stared at me with wide eyes.
"I love you, Mami." I said softly.
A small gasp escaped from Mami's lips. Mami stared into my eyes, spellbound.
A grin tugged at my lips, as I fondly reminisced. "How can I not? You are a beautiful and kind young girl who invited me, a stranger, into her home. All because I needed a place to sleep for the night. You made me dinner. You offered me a shower. You gave me a bed to sleep in. You cared for me, Mami. A complete stranger and a foreigner from America. And then I learned that you live by yourself, and that you have nobody to care for you. How can I not help but care about you, Mami?"
"Then why...?" Mami almost cried out.
"Do you know what love is, Mami?" I asked.
Mami shook her head into my chest.
"Love, true love, is the desire for what is best for the person you love." I said. "And it is because I love you I cannot accept this. How old are you, Mami?"
"Fifteen." Mami answered.
"You are still young, Mami." I said. "You have a long life ahead of you still. I don't want you to offer yourself to me and then regret it later on."
Mami pulled away from my touch and grasped the fabric of my shirt in her hands. She stared into me with wild eyes. "I won't regret this!" She cried out.
"Perhaps not today." I replied. "But what about tomorrow? A week from now? A month? A year? A decade? When your moment of fear has passed and you learn more about the man I am, would you still say the same thing?
"Because that's the thing, Mami. You're scared, and you're afraid right now. And I don't want you to offer yourself to me, a stranger, in a moment of weakness. Not like this. It's not right. It's not fair to me, and it's not fair to you. You deserve more, Mami. You deserve better than this."
Anguish filled my voice. "So, please. Get to know me first, before you offer yourself to me." I pleaded with Mami. "Because you deserve to at least know the man before you sleep with him. You deserve to at least fall in love first before you offer this. Because if you are going to offer this, I want you to go in with both eyes open, not blinded by despair. Because I do not want you to have any regrets."
I pressed my forehead against hers. "Can you do that for me, Mami?" I whispered. "Wait until you truly know me?"
Mami's forehead pressed back against mine. "Hai." She answered quietly.
A tranquil silence settled in between us. I closed my eyes, and I made sure to enjoy this moment of peace for every second I could get away with. This morning is filled with way too much drama already. And it hasn't even been a day.
But even peace has to end sooner or later. I opened my eyes and nudged Mami with my head.
"Alright, Mami." I said. "Time for you to get up and put some clothes on. Then we need to talk."
Mami went still in my arms.
"I'm not going to leave you," I assured her, "But there are some things we need to talk about first, and I'd prefer not to have it while you are still naked."
Mami looked down at herself and blushed a deep shade of red. She quickly scrambled off from my laps and power-walked her way towards the bathroom. My treacherous eyes followed her shapely butt as she walked away from me.
But then she stopped, and I paused my ogling of her... posterior. My eyes traveled up her naked back, up her mane of wet and golden hair, to her head twisted over her shoulders to look back at me, and into her wide eyes staring at me. Our eyes met.
I flushed with embarrassment. Mami smirked triumphantly.
Chills tingled my spine.
Mami looked away. And then she proceeded to sashay her hips as she walked towards the bathroom, this time at a much more slower pace.
My mouth suddenly felt dry. My heart hammered in my chest. My loins burned a hole in my pants. I swallowed. She's doing that on purpose, I realized.
Then, I really shouldn't be watching.
And, I really shouldn't be encouraging her.
And finally, This is a really bad idea.
But I did not look away.
[HAROLD]
Mami went into the bathroom. When she emerged, now dressed in her school uniform and blushing a deep shade of red, I was waiting for her at the dining room table, sitting on the only chair and having finally managed to calm myself down after all of... that. Mostly.
My erection just refused to calm down. Every time I tried to think of something to help curb my lust, a memory of a naked Mami pops up in my mind again, and my dick goes right back to being hard and making my pants way too tight for me. It is frustrating and annoying.
I perked up when I saw her nervously approaching me. My eyes softened, and I opened my arms out to her invitingly while still seated. "Mami." I said gently.
Mami, I have noticed, seem to be very physically affectionate with me. I am hoping that allowing her to engage in this behavior will help calm her down and make her comfortable, at least a little. Maybe it will work. Maybe it will blow up in my face. But it doesn't hurt to at least try.
Mami's eyes watered, and she rushed over to me. She climbed onto my laps, planted her butt over my covered erection, draped her legs over one side of my laps, leaving them dangling in the air, and then laid her head down in the crook between my neck and my shoulders and placed a hand over my heart. I leaned my head against hers and embraced her in my arms, drawing her closer to me. Mami drew in a deep breath and then let it out as a deep sigh.
I swallowed, being intimately and incredibly aware of just how close we were.
"I'm sorry," She whispered.
"I forgive you," I said.
And that was that. A moment of comfortable silence stretched between us, as we enjoyed each other's presence, and I tried to ignore my burning loins.
But even that peace cannot last forever. Not when we still need to address the elephant in the room.
I drew in a deep breath and let it out, to help prepare myself for the conversation ahead. "So," I began, "We need to talk."
Mami tensed. "About what?" She asked, a little defensively.
"A few things." I said. "First, how long were you planning on hosting me?"
Mami nuzzled my neck. "For as long as you need."
Fresh memories flashed in my mind, when Mami tried to... seduce me. Guilt and shame gripped my heart. I swallowed again. "I..." I began to say, then I aborted and simply whispered, "Thank you."
Mami snuggled against me.
I took a few moments to recollect my thoughts.
"Second, I'm going to need to contact the US Embassy in order to figure out my current legal status." I said. "I don't think I'm going to do it today-" Not after everything that just happened. I still need to decompress and compartmentalize everything first before I can approach them. Seriously, what the fuck, Mami?! "-But I will need to do that soon. Do you have any advice for that, Mami?"
Mami was confused. "Why do you need to do that?"
"Mami," I said gently, "Think how this would look from the police's perspective. I am an American foreigner who woke up in Japan, with no clear memories of how I got here and currently living with a teenage girl who lives by herself. I don't think the police is going to think too kindly of me when they find out. In their eyes, at best, I am simply an American tourist that got down with short-term amnesia and getting help from a local schoolgirl. At worst, I am an illegal immigrant who took advantage of an innocent schoolgirl and is sexually abusing her."
Mami looked downright offended. "But that's not true!" She shouted.
"But they don't know that. And that is why it is important to take care of my paperwork quickly, so that it is one less weapon they can use against us." I said. "I promise to stay by you, and I mean it, but even I can't fight off the police by myself."
Mami actually growled. It was kinda adorable, coming from her. "I'll protect you, Hari." She promised. "I won't let them take you away from me."
I nuzzled this cute little magical girl. "And I appreciate that, Mami." I said. "But let's try to avoid that for now. Do you have any suggestions for me?"
Mami fumed for a few moments. I felt my lips quirked into a little smile as I watched her. No doubt she thinks that I don't believe her, and she is upset she can't reveal the truth to me. It is unfortunate that I have to deceive her like this, but it is necessary, for both her sake and my own.
"I... know a person." Mami finally spoke up. "He might be able to help us. He can at least check through your files and make sure everything is in order, so the police don't get too suspicious."
My brows furrowed. She's probably talking about Kyubey, then. Now, how to...
"Is he... expensive?" I asked hesitantly.
Mami was scandalized. "What? No! Kyubey's my friend!"
I blinked. "Kyubey?" I echoed back.
It was hilarious to watch Mami's face when she realized her mistake, as she gaped like fish. She rapidly blushed a deep shade of red.
Mami clumsily tried to recover. "No-no-no! It's just a nickname! No, a pet name! Yes, a pet name! Kyubey's just his pet name that I call him by!"
Wow, that is a horrible cover story. But this is way too funny to not poke fun at.
I quirked a questioning eyebrow at Mami. "So, you know a man who can access the Government's database just because you asked, and he likes you, a beautiful schoolgirl, to call him by your pet name for him? Is that right?"
"No! Well, yes, but-! Arrgh! It's not like that!" Mami whined.
I chuckled, and I smirked at her. "I'm sorry, but you're just too cute for me to not mess with a little." After saying that, I bopped my finger against her cute little nose.
Mami looked shocked at my action. She, somehow, managed to blush an even deeper shade of red, and she buried her face into my chest. "Meanie." Mami mumbled.
I chuckled again, but then my voice turned serious. "He's not... making you do anything illegal, is he?" I asked her.
Mami turned towards me, her eyes wide. Her eyes flickered from me to the table, and I followed her gaze. Her eyes turned back to me. Slowly, she shook her head. "No." Mami said. "He just owes me a favor, is all."
I suppressed the urge to narrow my eyes. Bastard is right in front of me, isn't he? Creepy little shit.
I sighed and finally let the matter drop. "You know him the best, Mami. I'll trust you on this." I leaned forward towards Mami's face. "But if he ever makes you feel uncomfortable or unsafe, come to me, and I'll do my best to help you. Okay, Mami?"
Mami nodded her head, her face a deep shade of red.
I nodded and withdrew my head back. "When do you want to call him?"
Mami shuffled a little on my laps.
"It... needs to be private." Mami said softly.
I nodded my head in acceptance. "Okay. Understood. Which brings me to my third point: I am going to need to do some minor shopping. If I am going to be living with you, I'm going to need to buy some men's toiletries and some change of clothes. I can go off and do that, and you can contact your friend of yours while I'm away. Does that sound like a plan to you?"
Mami went still.
I pressed my forehead against her head. "Mami?" I asked gently.
"You're not going to leave me again, are you?" Mami whispered softly.
I paused. No amount of words is ever going to assure her, would they? She needs proof, not empty words.
I reached out to under the collar of my shirt and pulled out my crucifix. Slowly, I pulled it out from around my neck and placed it around hers. Mami's bright golden eyes stared into mine, confused.
"Here." I whispered. "This was a gift from my mother."
Her eyes widened with horror. "Wait! No!" She said. "I can't accept this!"
I smiled at her with sadness and sympathy in my eyes. "It's fine. You need it more."
"But-!" She tried to protest.
I interrupted her by placing a finger on her soft lips, and I pressed the crucifix into her bosom. "It's fine. You need it more." I said softly. "I can only pray that it will bring you as much comfort as it did for me."
I leaned my forehead forward until it touched hers, my eyes staring into hers. "Do you believe me now, Mami?" I asked softly
Mami's eyes watered, and she threw her arms around my neck. "I'm sorry!" She wailed. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!"
I wrapped my arms around this sobbing and wailing young girl and pressed her against me, stroking her yellow hair and whispering comforting nonsense into her ears.
Damn, I thought, now slightly annoyed with myself, I didn't think she would react this badly.
[HAROLD]
It took awhile before Mami finally calmed down, and we could prepare for my little shopping trip.
Mami gave me the necessary cash and directions to the shopping mall. I, on the other hand, deposited everything from my pockets that I did not need for the trip onto the kitchen island, keeping only my wallet, my rosary, and my smartphone. I also put on my glasses and hearing aids, which Mami was fascinated by. We traded contact information, in case we need to call each other. Then, before I left, I embraced Mami in one last hug and planted a kiss on her forehead.
"Be safe, Mami." I said to her, as she stared up at my face.
"Come back soon." Mami whispered to me, a hand fondling my crucifix.
And then I left.
The trip itself was uneventful. I took the public bus to the subway terminal, and then paid my ticket and entered the train. The hardest part was batting away and trying not to dwell on memories of Mami from this morning.
-the cherry taste of her lips, the feel of her naked body pressed up against my own, the warm touch of her wet skin under my hands-
It was... difficult.
But, finally, mercifully, I arrived at my destination, ending my mental torment. I climbed out of the subway portal onto a busy street, filled with Japanese pedestrians and a riot of hair colors. My eyes squinted in the bright sunlight, trying to get my bearings, and I stifled my sudden urge to stare at the rainbow brigade of colorful hair. Now isn't the time to gawk and stare like a dumb tourist. Now, where is-
Ebeniza, a young girl's voice whispered inside my head.
I blinked. Ebenezer. My childhood name. But who would-
Dread filled me. I turned around, my eyes quickly searching where the girl's voice might be, dreading, praying that I was dead wrong.
I saw her. There was no way I could not recognize her.
A young and beautiful Japanese girl with long black hair stepped through the crowd and walked towards me, dressed in the Mitakihara Middle School female uniform: a light vanilla coat over a white shirt, with a red ribbon tied in a bow around her collar, a checkered miniskirt over black pantyhose, and a pair of black dress shoes. A black hairband sat on top of her head, and her long raven hair danced in the wind. Her eyes the color of amethysts bored into me, filled with tears and a sorrowful joy. A beatific and - knowing what I know - tragic smile graced her red lips. A cross studded with amethyst gemstones waved in the air from around her neck, with the largest gemstone, an amethyst the size of my thumbnail, taking up the center core of the cross.
Ebeniza, the young girl's voice whispered again in my head, filled with longing. The girl's hand went up to her head and tucked a strand of raven hair behind her ears. Her brilliant purple eyes sparkled.
She was breathtaking.
She was hypnotizing.
She was terrifying.
Absolute terror flooded my body. I whirled around in a blind panic, hoping, praying, that there was some other poor bastard that she was looking for. It had happened to me before.
No such luck. Folks were already looking at the two of us and making space. Some of them were even making judgmental stares.
Indignation flared up in me. You sunuvabi-!
And then it was too late. The girl walked up to me and wrapped her arms around my neck, pressing her lithe body against my own. Shock filled my mind, and I froze still, not daring to even think about moving.
The girl with amethyst eyes stared up at me, smiling softly, her tearful face lit up by the Sun. Her raven hair rippled in the wind against the clear blue sky. The scent of flowers clung to her. Her cross, studded with purple gemstones, dangled from her neck, gleaming in the sunlight.
Belatedly, I just noticed that she barely reached the end of my chin.
Just like Helena. Just like Mami.
Just like Mami.
Mami-
-stared at me, her lips curling in a bright smile, her yellow eyes dancing with clear delight, her wet mane of yellow hair shining like a radiant halo in the sunlight, while her naked body straddled my-
The memory quickly faded away, and I found myself staring back at the girl with bright purple eyes and dark raven hair with wide and terrified eyes. My heart hammered away in my chest. My lungs drew in quick, shallow breaths. My face burned a deep red heat. I swallowed thickly.
"Wha-" I was about to say, but the girl interrupted me.
She closed her eyes, raised her face up to me, and-
She tasted like cherries.
I stared down, stupefied, at her face, as the girl with raven hair kissed me with her eyes closed and tears dripping down her face. I was too stunned to even think of reciprocating her kiss.
The girl pulled back from my lips and opened her eyes. I was hypnotized by the brilliant purple color of her eyes and the emotions boiling inside of them. Grief. Joy. Devotion. Relief.
"You're alive." The girl whispered against my lips, her voice filled with raw grief and clear relief. "You're still alive, Benza."
Oh.
Oh, no.
Oh, I am so fucked.
Akemi Homura desperately clung to me and wept.
A/N: Poor Hari. He ran away from one temptation straight into the waiting arms of another. Poor bastard. He doesn't stand a chance.
This is really my first serious attempt at writing erotica, so please tell me how I did, so I can work on building up and improving on my smut writing skills. (Boy, never thought I would ever post those words on the Internet.) Please continue to comment and criticize on my work, and thank you for reading this little guilty pleasure of mine.