Hello all, now I know my author's note is usually at the bottom, but I just wanted to say, prepare to laugh! (At least I think what I've written is funny, it differs from person to person.)
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"My name's Akito. Nice to meet you Ootori-kun," he smiled politely as his skin crawled. It felt plain wrong to call Kyoya by such a familiar suffix.
Damn, now if Kyoya looks into that name I'm doomed... Oh well, I'll just be a mystery.
Shion noticed Kyoya frown slightly. Maybe he should have called him by his first name instead. He was bound to make a connection, but the use of the suffix kun probably threw him off. Shion reached into his bag and grabbed his water bottle. His throat was getting sore. He'd been recording some songs the other day too and it didn't recover as well as he thought.
"Akito-san!" Shion's attention moved to Tamaki who bounced back pretty quickly from his teasing and was already back to normal. "I was wondering what Shion's like. To be honest we don't know that much about him."
Shion blinked, ah, this will be odd to answer. How do I even answer this? Well for one, it would be asking to be found out if he told any lies at this point—lest they find out and ask him about this whole thing. "Shion, hmm. Well, for starters he's stubborn."
"I think we got that," one of the twins huffed, he thought it was Kaoru, but wasn't too sure. The rest of them nodded, agreeing wholeheartedly.
"He doesn't appreciate being forced to do things," Once again another thing they've experienced about him, "doesn't open up very easily, likes fooling people, good at lying, he's rather sarcastic and to top it all off he's cunning." Shion smiled—trying to get the feeling of a loving family member across. "But despite all of that, Shion's a kind person at heart." He felt embarrassed to say that about himself, but it was all for the act.
"You forgot unforgiving," Haruhi added in good humour, a laugh coming out as she glanced to Kyoya.
"True, true," Shion barked a laugh. Haruhi knew him well. "When he was just a wee-little one, like this small," he gestured to just around his knee height, "I ate the last pudding from the fridge. I've never met such a passive-aggressive kid." Shion actually remembered an incident like that with his uncle.
As they were talking the clouds started to roll in, before they were just scattered, but now they were darkening the sky. On one end it was nice and sunny, though far off in the distance the clouds brought nothing but grey darkness, they were right in the middle of the two while they stood in the park. Shion looked up to the sky and smelled the air. "It's going to rain." He could also see the blurring by the grey clouds in the distance, so it was technically raining already.
"Really?"
"Just look at the clouds. It's going to pour too." Shion informed as he started to pack up, "You youngsters should get home, there's going to be a storm."
"That looks like a lot to carry, do you need help carrying that?" Hani asked, despite how short he was, he was quite strong.
Smiling down towards the blond, Shion leaned over and ruffled Hani's hair. "I'm good, thanks for the offer though little one."
"Okay, bye Akito-san!" Hani waved cheerily as he ran back towards the retreating figures of his friends. Shion waved back, but someone stayed behind for a moment and Mori looked at Shion as if he knew who he was.
Shion noticed the knowing look in his eyes and rubbed the back of his head with a deep sigh, "Mori…" his visible blue eye narrowed in warning, "Don't tell them. They don't need to know."
"Why?"
Shion laughed, "Because it's fun." He tucked a stray lock of hair behind his ear and got back into the role, his voice going back down to that silky register, "Now, I'm sure that I'm entertaining, but you're losing your friends, boya."
"Takashi, come on!" Hani called from the back of the group. Mori nodded to Shion and left to join back up with them.
Shion sighed and ran a hand through his hair, "Man, out of all the people Mori noticed. He's sharper than I thought. Though Kyoya will most likely find out soon..." He heard a rumble from the sky, the thunder was getting closer by the minute. Shion hastily gathered all his things and left the park before he would get rained on.
Returning to his apartment, he put his stuff back in his studio and grabbed towels to dry his stuff off. It started pouring on the way back and he was soaked. He took extra care drying the amp, that thing was damn expensive and he sure as hell didn't want it to short out on him. It was more important than drying himself. He was soaked. The hair he had gotten straightened was sopping wet and his clothes felt horrible as the material stuck to him. Shion had just started grabbing towels to dry off when he heard a bang from next door and went to investigate.
Shion put it around his shoulders to catch the water dripping from his hair before exiting his apartment. He rapped his knuckle on Haruhi's door and he heard an exasperated sigh from the other side of the door.
"Stop knocking things over. Just sit down and stay still!" He heard Haruhi and she sounded annoyed. Maybe she picked up a stray? There were more noises and the door finally opened and it was Haruhi, and she looked quite surprised to see him.
There was also Kyoya right behind her.
"Ah, Akito-san, why are you here?"
Thankfully Kyoya called him by his persona's name, as he forgot that was how he looked at the moment. It gave him the warning to change his voice once again.
Shion raised an eyebrow, looking at Kyoya with a stern look. That tone he used felt quite rude. "Well, I heard a bang and wanted to make sure everything was alright."
"Everything is fine," Kyoya answered, and his eyes narrowed suspiciously, "And what brings you in the area?"
"I was returning the items I borrowed from Shion, no need to sound so hostile Ootoru-kun." He thought the response up on the spot and it still felt weird to talk about himself in third person.
"Shion lives nearby? Oooh, we must go see him!" Tamaki yelled from inside the apartment, jumping up from his spot on the ground in excitement.
Fuck. Tamaki why?
Shion breathed in with a hiss, "Ahhh, that's not too good an idea. He's actually sick and sleeping right now."
"All the more reason to visit him. We must make him feel better!"
Well, that had taken a turn for the worse...
Shion started to look uncomfortable and Kyoya noticed it, though he played it off by shivering and faking a sneeze. That was when Mori spoke up. "If he's sick, then we might catch his cold."
Shion smiled briefly at Mori, thanking him.
Good job Mori!
"Colds are more contagious when they first start," Haruhi reasoned, but she had to wonder because if Shion was sick he would have told her.
The others reluctantly agreed to their arguments.
Shion bid goodbye and went back to his apartment, making sure that he wasn't being watched. "Wow, I just made a web of lies..." Did he feel guilty? Not really. Though he would have to play along with his lies and make them true. Therefore, he now had to act sick.
He got into some baggy sweatpants, a long-sleeved shirt and a robe. He took his contacts out too, now it would be believable. If anyone would approach him anytime soon he could just pinch his nose to give it that sick red look.
In the meantime, Shion made a cup of his favourite pure vanilla tea and sat down to play a game, though soon after he heard a knock at his door. He got up to answer and brought his tea with him but the door opened before he could open it himself.
"Haruhi?"
"I heard you were... Sick..." Haruhi slowly narrowed her eyes at him in suspicion. His hair wasn't as straight as it was before because of the water, but as it dried it did start to turn wavy and Haruhi made that connection. She sighed and let herself in, "I brought you some soup, Akito."
"...How?"
She pointed at his head and he was confused. Shion put a hand on his head... his hair, of course. Shion smirked and lowered his voice to the suave voice he used as Akito, "How are you Koneko-chan," he teased her by grabbing her chin just like earlier in the park.
"Stop that," She blushed lightly and slapped his hand away. Yes, she knew he was teasing her, but it still made her heart race a bit.
"Aha, but didn't I tell you that I broke the system?" She looked at him questioningly.
"So?"
He thought that she would have caught on by now, seeing how she was a smartie who got into Ouran on an academic scholarship. "Street performing? The tips? Just today I got around fifty dollars or about six thousand yen." He watched as realization dawned upon her.
"So that's what you meant."
"Mmm-hmm," he nodded, still using the voice and laughed when Haruhi gave him an unamused look. Shion moved the pot onto the counter, put some into a bowl and microwaved it. He wasn't going to waste food. "Want some?"
"Ahhhhh…. I don't think it'll be good."
"Why? Didn't you make it?—thanks by the way."
"Hikaru, Kaoru, and Tamaki made it."
"Oh..." Shion looked at the pot with a fearful expression. He swallowed thickly when the microwave went off, signalling that his food should be warm. "Well... it won't hurt to try it, right?" He took a spoon and tried it after blowing it to a less steamy temperature.
His face turned a bright red and he could feel the soup burning him even though it was only a bit warm, his eyes started watering and he went to drink from the faucet. The soup was a yellowish colour, so he assumed that it was chicken noodle. Oh, how wrong he was. The soup had an overwhelming amount of spices and the flavour was so concentrated that it stuck on his tongue even when he chugged water. He could see the pitiful expression on Haruhi's face out of the corner of his eye and Shion could imagine the Hitachiin's giggling madly with devious smirks with devil horns and tails. Tamaki probably just meant goodwill... But he went overboard a lot.
Therefore he would mainly blame the twins for his suffering.
He brought his mouth away from the tap and turned the water off, wiping his chin. He glared with all his hatred at the pot. It took a while to somewhat recover from the overwhelming soup of hell.
Shion looked Haruhi dead in the eye and said, "Never, ever, by any chance eat their cooking. It's worse than Ryoji when he first started to cook." He sighed, trying to rein in his simmering frustration. "I need a shower. Stay here—I'll need an excuse to go back with you so I could give them a piece of my mind."
"I should get back though." She didn't want them trashing her apartment.
"They can wait. If you're gone for a while then they'll think I live farther away."
With that, he went to his bathroom.
• • • • • •
"Haruhi's taking a while isn't she?" Tamaki said, worried.
"They might just be talking."
"Or Shion lives a block away or something," Kaoru added.
"True..."
"I wonder if he likes the soup," Hikaru snickered, Kaoru soon joined in.
They flinched when the door suddenly slammed open and they looked to an angry Shion, the water from his curly hair was dripping onto his clothes, indicating that he either got caught in the rain, or just had a shower, the latter was more obvious as the scent of vanilla-spice shampoo or body wash came off him in waves just like his anger. He had a dark look in his eye that made shivers go down their spines.
"Try the soup she said. It'll be good she said," he growled, wanting them to get the point that he was beyond pissed off. He could still feel the heat of it in his mouth—he was a fan of spicy food, but that soup was overseasoned to the point where it wasn't just spicy.
"W-was it good?" Tamaki stuttered nervously at the waves of anger coming off of Shion who looked as if he was about to murder someone—and it seemed like he would be the first victim.
"Do you call over spiced laced with Satan's tears—good?" He crossed his arms and sharply looked over to the twins. They stiffened and looked away under his glare. The smirk he wore turned devilish, "Why don't you try your demonic creation, Suoh, Hitachiin." Shion could feel the sadist in himself emerging.
Haruhi followed Shion in with the warm pot of Satan in tow.
"It should be okay though..." Tamaki said as he used a spoon that was offered. It looked normal, He tried some and fell to the floor immediately after putting it in his mouth. He was gasping and fanning his mouth, his face beet red from the heat. "I-Impossible! This is not what I made!" When Tamaki made it—with Haruhi's guidance—it was just normal soup, but when he went to the restroom it turned out that the twins had tinkered with during that time span.
"Aha, so I was right," all eyes went to the twins.
"Um... Sorry?" they said, nervously laughing and avoiding eye contact.
Shion smiled with an evil glint in his eye. He got two bowls from Haruhi's cupboard and filled it with the concoction before handing it to the twins.
"Enjoy your soup of pain."
The twins grimaced and swallowed thickly. They could feel Shion's eyes burning into their backs. Grabbing the spoons, they started eating and now knew the agony that Shion had felt. Hell, he could still feel the burning sensation on his tongue.
"This soup is the perfect representation of what it would be like if you were Satan's lover." That wasn't a good image to imagine judging by the facial expressions that went across the clubs faces. Even Kyoya and Mori grimaced.
After they had about half of the bowl Haruhi spoke up, worried and concerned from the looks on their faces. "Isn't that enough?"
Tamaki pitched in, sweating just from watching the twins ate the concoction. "They made it in hopes of you to get well."
"I had a dizzy spell and a migraine. I wasn't sick. Whoever told you that over-exaggerated," oddly enough he told them that as Akito.
"Oh look, their souls are escaping," Hani looked at the twins fluctuating souls with fascination and curiosity.
Shion blinked at the looks he was getting, "What? I never said that they had to eat it. Never mind as much as they did."
The group sweatdropped.
Never get him past his breaking point... Or he will break you.
• • • • • •
So? Was it funny? I hope so! This is towards my ideal type of writing, light-hearted and fun. Comedy in general I guess.
Also I'm thinking of changing the title... Any suggestions? The Musician is too generic, too vague. Plus he's also an actor... I dunno. Maybe... The Entertainer? Wait that's a song. Uhh... I just can't think! Please help this fool of an author! *bows in a dogeza*
So I'll see you, in the next chapter! Bu-bye!