Back to me bitches! Pt 6

"He saved his teacher from being killed by the same thing that got him. He also saved 2 of his classmates from a villain in an apparent hostage situation. But they said he ended up losing an age in the process."

"Mhm."

"Hello, I'm sorry. I was too late."

Could the bitches stop blabbering. I thought as I lay there. Suddenly this feeling spread over me. You know when you're sleeping, comfortable in bed, when you suddenly realise you've overslept. I gasped slightly as I leaned forward. My eyes shot open as a cover flew off my face.

Yaawn*

I rubbed the sleep from my eyes and some eye snot that was probably blood.

I felt around my right eye to feel that it was fine. I could see now. I waved my hand in front of my face when I realised. Where are the voices I heard before? It's too quiet. I looked to my right to see dad standing with some sort of detective. Their jaws were on the ground.

"That was the best nap I've ever had." I said as I stretched and cracked my neck. I was still stretching as I got tackled by dad. He had his hands on my face turning and inspecting every detail.

"I told you all I was going to be okay." I said as I put on my ugly pair of glasses. And stood up from the embrace. As I did I felt the back of my suit stick off my back. I grimaced as I took it off.

"So what did I miss? We beat 'em I suppose. Although in my opinion all might could've arrived just a bit earlier." I said as I rubbed my shoulders.

The detective composed himself before stretching out his hand.

"Hello, my name's detective Tsukauchi." I took his hand in mine.

"Hello, I'm Jesus Christ. Just kidding I'm Ckahte ashido." I said as I smiled.

"You were just on the ground dead. How'd you wake up. I mean pronounced dead officially." He said with a confused expression.

"I told Asui that I was immortal. I guess she didn't believe me. I don't really know how I do it." I said as I looked down to the dark sign.

"What are you implying?" He asked.

"Oh I've died before. I woke up in Japan after jumping off a bridge and when I woke up alone in black ice I died to hypothermia. I think Mina's cooking has done it a few times as well." I said as I recounted all the times I've died. Dad laughed at the part about Mina's cocking. I guess he had regained his senses.

"You're not even lying." He said as a shocked expression spread across his face.

"Okay, Ckahte. I'll try to reverse your death certificate. In the meantime, I guess you're free to go." The detective said as he rubbed the back of his head. The amount of paperwork on his back right now was laughable.

Dad ran in to hug me again as he jumped.

"Oh you're ok you're ok you're ok you're ok!" He said as we spun. I looked around to see the rest of the USJ.

"Hey, where is Mina?" I asked as I looked around, now a little worried.

"Oh she's with mom in the car she's fine." Dad said. An evil smile spread across my face.

"Hey dad, are you up for playing with some emotions? Like a prank." I said.

"Well she took the car to go home with Mina, letting me stay here all alone. We're going to have to order a cab home. So why not?" He said as we walked up the stairs.

"Make that 2 cab rides. I want to make a big dinner tonight. We need to stop by the supermarket to get some things. I'll be making food today." I sad as we got out and the cab pulled up. We were the only people there except for some policemen. While at the supermarket we browsed the selection.

Here's my improvised shopping list.

1 kg of potatoes

Bag of flour

Eggs

Diced pork

Onion

Butter

Allspice.

—

Milk

Yeast

Kardemum

Sugar

Almonds

Almond mass

Whipped cream

—-

Salt vinegar chips

Sour cream and onion chips

Ranch dipping sauce.

—-

Tonight we were eating like kings. We got to the checkout and paid. We then ordered a new cab home.

"Alright when we get there I'm going to stay behind for like 10 minutes as you hug and do all the sad sad mourning things you'd do If I didn't wake up. Then I sneak in and start making food. And hopefully I can at least get half of it deone before one of you comes in to reheat some leftovers or make some instant noodles or some other shit like that. And pow! I'm there." I said as we began to come close to out destination. Dad had his hand on his chin, nodding through the entire explanation.

"Sounds good. You know you're about to give them the shock of their lives. Prepare for repercussions." He said as we pulled up to our apartment.

"I'm at peace with that." I said as dad stepped out. I took the bags and went through the first door with him but stopped before our apartment door. He saluted me before opening the door to the pinkman house as I'd dubbed it. Mom and Mina came down and greeted him with a hug and a few sobs. Little did they know I was standing just down the stairs, 5 feet under instead of six. They talked for a few more minutes until I couldn't hear them anymore, probably taking the talk to the living room. I shivered a bit with the bags in the stairway. After 2 more minutes of waiting I walked up and opened the door as quietly as possible. As I did I also grabbed my neptuse jacket from its coat hanger in the hallway before sneaking my way to the kitchen. I heard the talking about what they were going to do now. They talked for a little while more as I unpacked in the kitchen before they put on a soap opera I know that mom watched. I heard the scoping of spoons in our bowls. These bitchese were eating ice cream and watching romantic dramas. I put on the jacket and started preparing what I used to call

"Kroppkakor." Traditional Swedish food that tastes amazing and has loads of fat in it. Lowkey, I was a mastermind for thinking of making this. Dad came into the kitchen to see me in my neptuse.

"I told them that I was making dinner. You have an hour." He said. More than enough. I was already done with the hard part of it, mangling the potatoes.

"Is there anything I can help with?" dad asked.

"Yes actually. You can spice up the pork. But you're not allowed to use any of your asian spices." I said as I pulled out a floor board and revealed a hidden compartment of VIP ingredients. Among these were Swedish all purpose spice, safran, and rosemary. I pulled out most of what we needed. Dad gave me a look before joining me in the kitchen.

"Who are you talking to in there?" Mom yelled in a shaky voice.

"No one, my demons. I think I've contracted schizophrenia." Dad said. I looked at him as he spiced the pork. My mouth was agape.

"Nice save man. I did not expect that from you." I said. Dad looked proud of himself as he finished the pork. I rolled the pork spice mix into the potato mix. Making what if not described as kroppkakor would be described as potato dumplings. I made them and threw them into a saucepan with boiling water. I set another saucepan and filled it with butter and set it to a low heat to let it melt but not boil. As the potato dumpling were boiling I poured cream in a bowl and set it on the table. I gave dad a go ahead and I opened the kitchen door. I didn't immediately make myself noticed. I left the door open and I stepped back into the kitchen. I turned on the speaker that was on the kitchen table and put on Reborn. I told dad to stand by the counter so that he would be the first person everyone would see. I opened the hidden compartment again and fished out an unopened jar of lingonberry jam and set in on the table. I grabbed plates for everyone. I set the table and sat down. After like 40 seconds of reborn running Mina came in.

"What is wrong with you dad? First you don't seem genuine about losing your only son. Then you say you have schizophrenia. You know how disrespectful that is? And now this. Kanye? Who over 50 listens to Kanye." Mina said, wiping a tear from her eye.

"It doesn't help that it's the first thing I said to him." She said as she walked up to dad, standing by the saucepan.

"What are you making? It looks horrible. Like depressed dumplings." She said, more annoyed now than sad.

I gave her a glare from the table. I was offended. I went through all this to have it be called "depressed dumplings." It was perfect. Meal that helps with depression.

"The hypocrite speaks about food." I said.

Mina jumped and looked towards me. For one second I had what looked like an offended expression before breaking and smiling at her. She looked at me with a shocked expression, a tear ran down her face.

"You know, I told Tsu that I was going to be fine. Did she not tell you that?" I said as I took off my rims.

"Shut up!" Dad said. I raised my eyebrows and stretched my lips. Mina took a slow step forward from the counter. I stood up from the table. She took another slow step forward.

"Are you real?" She asked as she stretched out her hand to touch my cheek.

"As real as ever." I said as her palm enveloped my cheek. She felt around for just a second before jumping into a hug. A hug that was way worse than I'd expected. I thought it would be a happy reunion. But this hug was just sad. Her face sank into my shoulders as she used my body for support. While there she started sobbing loudly.

Sob.

Sob.

Sob.

"I thought you were gone." She said as she pulled off and looked me in the eye, teary eyes and furled lips into a frown.

"Gone but not for good. You should've seen me man, or maybe you shouldn't." I said.

"Just shut up for a minute would ya?" Mina said as she looked into my eyes. Then she hugged me again, her ear to my chest this time, feeling my heartbeat. I just stood there, letting her fall into me.

"What's going on in here? What have you done now?" Mom asked as she walked into the kitchen. At first she looked at dad, then at Mina, then she walked up slowly, not believing her eyes. It was Mina times two. We were all in a group hug. For minutes it went on. I had to step out to turn off the boiling water to the potato dumplings but I was sucked right back into it. After a few minutes more we released.

"How'd you do it?" Mom asked.

"I don't know. I've done it before and I'm not going to elaborate further.

"Did it hurt?" Mina said as she looked at me worriedly.

"Not more than that hug did. It was more uncomfortable than painful. But when you die this incredible peace spreads over your body. A comfort in discomfort. I'd recommend it, but not really." I said as I poured the food into a big bowl and set it on the table.

"Don't say that!" She said, pouting.

"Well well. The dinner is ready. It's my own recipe. Depressed food for depressed people. I hope you enjoy it." I said as I set the big bowl down on the table. I took my seat again as the rest of them sat down.

"Now, everyone, please pardon me dying. These are boiled potato dumplings, kroppkakor. Eat them with all the things I've set the table with. Melted butter, cream, lingonberry jam." I sad as I took one for myself. I poured the melted butter and cream before spooning a bit of jam to the side. I waited for the rest to do the same. When they'd all copied me I instructed them to eat. They all took chopsticks from the counter. A frown spread across my face. Well well, this wasn't Sweden so I couldn't blame them.

"You can take a man out of Sweden but you can never take the Sweden out of him." I said as I grabbed a knife and fork to eat with. Mina put a piece of the food in her mouth with a bit of hesitation. I saw the precise moment hat face melted like the butter, cream dripped from the corner of her mouth but she didn't seem to mind. Mom and dad looked at her expression in awe before trying some themselves and having almost the same reaction. Mina took another bite, this time a tear came out of her eye.

"I've missed you so much." She said as she chewed.

"Chill, I've only been gone for a few hours." I said as I started eating.

"It felt like you were gone forever. It's different when you are gone like you were. Don't ever do that again." She said as she ate.

"However, one thing you can do again is these things. Best food I've had in a while." Mom said as she continued eating.

"You aren't getting it very often. I have to import the ingredients." I said as I pointed to the jam.

"Yeah I haven't seen that before. Is that even in our cabinet?" She said as she looked at the label.

"You won't believe it but he has a hidden compartment in one of our floorboards." Dad said as he pointed in the general direction of the loose board. Mom gave me a look before chowing down again. We all finished the food and took out the dishes. The rest of the night was planed like this. Do the dishes, start a comedy to get everyone's mind off of me dying, open the bags of chips, frolic in the couch until I get tired, go to bed. I got through most of the plan until the getting to bed part. I stood up to brush my teeth and got to the bathroom. Where my troubles started. Mina dragged at the handle, begging to be let in. After I was done I unlocked the door to let her in. She gave me a look as she went in. At least some of her personality was back. I got up to our room and remembered, I still have my Neptuse on. I took it off and placed it on Wankers cage, who hopefully was at the Bakugou household right now. I went to bed and browsed my phone for a while. Mina came up and went to bed above me. I turned off my phone and tried to go to sleep. After about an hour I was disturbed by a thud on the floor. Then the zipper of my neptuse being dragged up. My covers were gently lifted and Mina got halfway into my bed.

"What are you doing?" I asked as I turned around.

"I can't sleep Ckahte. Today has fucked me up good." She pleaded.

"And why are you wearing my jacket?"

"I've got nothing under." She said

"You can put on a shirt man, you have a wardrobe. That's a winter jacket, you'll sweat to death." I said, now a bit more awake.

"Ok. Don't peek tho." She said as she turned around.

"Fine man, whatever." I turned around and faced the wall again. After a few more seconds she got into bed with me. She grabbed my waist and scooted in closer. Bring little spoon was actually sorta comfortable.

"Hey Mina." I said.

"What is it?" She responded.

"Have you told everybody that I'm alive?" I asked.

"No why woul- Ohh, I see. I'll help you with it." She said, realizing what I was going to do.

"Thank you. I'll give you the deets on the plan tomorrow. Goodnight." I said as I tried to fall asleep again.

"Goodnight." Mina said as she shifted slightly closer.

That was part 6 people. Hope you enjoyed it. Sorry for bringing up so many Swedish things but I had to incorporate it somehow.