Parodos: Strophê (III)
Disclaimer: I own neither properties
A/N: Translations in Order:
λύρα - Lyre/Lyra
Ἀδμήτη - Admete
Ἄργος - Argus
Περίφᾱς - Periphas/Aetos
ασφαλή ταξίδια - (Asfali Taxidia) safe travels
- X o X -
Edit: I narrowed down the Greek usage to only important names and dialogue where it can be ignored or have the meaning be inferred.
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- / Hera / -
"Tch! That damn boy… he's learning." Her husband muttered as he continued to grumble and whine behind her when he began yanking out the arrows piercing his fat, wayward arse.
"...pfft...kufufu..." It's a shame that her muffled laughter didn't escape his keen ire.
"Very subtle, by the way!" He waved an arrow angrily at her before slumping into her cane. "...my ass is gonna hurt for weeks..."
She simply whistled and nonchalantly rolled a Vali across her delicate knuckles in response. Although, there was definitely a noticeable pep to her step.
A prayer for payback is still a prayer, and besides, how could she ever ignore one of her adorable grandson's pleas? Especially one that's so easy and agreeable to grant.
"Oh dear, whatever could you be talking about? Who would ever curse you with such grievous-looking wounds?" Under the shadow of her hood, a mischievous and slightly sadistic smirk peaked through. "I'd have to thank them for punishing a filthy, manwhore like you."
"Oh, ha-ha." Despite his current position, he dared to click his tongue at her. "Thunder, I dunno who's the bigger witch ta' me. You or the kid's hellspawn-mother..."
"Perhaps you should start learning your lesson then. It's not like you can rely on that handsome appearance and charm anymore. You're about a hairline away from looking like those ugly bastards you hate." Okay, even she could admit that was a bit much. But on the other hand, he did have it coming.
Yet, a pit had immediately formed in her stomach when his countenance suddenly shifted. He went from dragging his feet to sidling up close to her. His face was now full of that dreadful and immensely annoying smugness that only appeared when he was about to grind her gears.
"Yeah, of course! So, how could wizened men such as I, possibly control our gazes around more young, flexible, and voluptuous women!? My endless pursuit for love (BDSM and Netori) should be praised-No! Venerated by all real men!"
'Deep breaths, Hera. Take deep breaths. Don't even deign that with a response. Your body is just more balanced than it was in the previous incarnation. Haha...that's right...your sisters are just anomalous freaks...haha...'
"Especially when some of us hafta' go home to such naggin', violent gorillas."
That's it. The Caestus is on now. "Ohoho, you silly, little cur. I'll give you something to love...AFTER I'M DONE BEATING THE CIRCUITS OUT OF YOU!"
"...tsk, tsk. You see, buddy? A total irrational gorilla. It's not like I can enjoy scanning her battlements anymore either."
"Kiee! Kee-Ke-Byat!"
She instantly hectored that bird down quickly. "Zip it, you winged rat! Why couldn't my lovely λύρα be sent instead!? That flaky, sun-child should never have stopped my husband from frying you to a charred crisp!" She righteously slammed her heel against the poor ground, easily cratering it in her frustration.
After that, Periphas had flown in a sorry bout of tears onto her husband's chest. It'd probably be adorable to see a bird embrace their master in any other instance. But here? It was almost sickening to see those old buffoons peck and pet each other so affectionately.
"I know, buddy, I know. Don't listen ta' her. She's got Chablis mouth."
Ugh! She forgot how infuriating it was to deal with this man every month. Why is she the one villainized when he's the one riling her up!?
But, at this point, she was feeling so drained that she tepidly released him from her hook. Periphas had quickly flown off and wing-smacked her husband's face in the process to avoid the same fall.
This had also caused her husband to flat on his bruised behind and yelp from his suffering. Her ominous shadow looming over him only made her vengeful satisfaction soar from seeing him cower before it.
"Shit! Honey, I-I was kidding! D-did I say gorilla? I mean...uh...a smokin' and glowin' angel! Yeah! ...Please don't punch mah dick."
Sadly, that wasn't her intention any longer. Instead, she huffed and crouched down to him. Ignoring his cringing whimper, she placed a gentle hand on his side. His shocked and embarrassed reaction was almost worth the change in plans.
"H-hon?"
"You've been holding your side since you arrived at the church. Now, move your arm and let me take a look at you. It would be uncouth of me if I throttled you while you were still injured from another's hand. I refuse to take someone's spoiled seconds, unlike you."
While she immediately regretted her poor choice of words, she just dared him to mention Metis or Demeter as a comeback. Instead, he stepped away from that trap and wisely opened up his side.
"...Haha...of course, bab-!"
However, it didn't stop her from igniting her hand in a greenish light.
"EEEOOUUuuoooowwgh! By my thunder, woman! I swear, are your spells always tryin' to kill me or somethin'!?"
"Oh, don't be foolish. That's just my endless love and patience pouring into you, dear."
"Uh-...nngh...-huh, fantastic, hon. Well, I guess it's...nngh...betta than...nngh...nothing."
She dropped her smiling facade to press down hard and reset his broken rib. "Good, now stop squirming and acting so dramatic. You don't want me setting a misaligned rib or creating an extra liver, do you?"
"Ha, you're all...nngh...heart. And I don't know, that second liver...nngh...ain't soundin' that bad." Of course, he'd say that.
The second her spell finally ended, though, he suddenly pulled her down to his lap. His burly, hairy arms wrapped around her and pressed her up against his warm chest.
Despite her indignant protesting, it didn't stop the red blooming on her cheeks. Especially since he was stroking her lower back in such a gentle way.
"Hon, you should've seen the boy. He came at me like a boar possessed! Heh, I still can't believe he blitzed me hard enough that even my Core felt it."
"I-it wasn't from the adventurers?" Hopefully, he hadn't noticed her mewl and stutter.
"Pssh, yeah right! Like I woulda' let those lasses get a score on anythin' but my ass! Nah, they'd hafta' work a lot harder for the rest of me, even with your help."
"A-and... how about our precocious little Bell?"
He must have felt her worry because he tilted her chin up to meet his loving gaze. Even his annoyingly boisterous laugh became endearing when combined with the reassuring grin he gave her.
"Ah, don't be embarrassed-" EEP! "-about losing ta' me." Whew! Thank chaos that he's so oblivious.
"I kept telling you that coddling the boy would do him no good. He's got a hero's spirit, just like his folks. Even if those lasses were on the green side, those twos and threes among them were still eating his dust. Heck, I might've had to release my restraints against him next month if it wasn't for the news today."
She almost pouted like a petulant child when he lowered her hood and softly ran his hand through her hair.
"I know what I'm doing. You can't keep stifling him with that churchy BS or play matchmaker between him and your girl. All ta' boy really needs is time alone, some wine, a few visits to a brothel, and a shit-ton of fightin' to calm a stormy soul!"
"Hn. It's still a crude method... perfectly fit for a simpleton like you to think of."
"Bah! It worked, didn't it?" His nose turned up in the air and practically grew to match his stroked ego. "Hmph, I guess I truly am betta' in every way than you are. My wicked smaht daughter wasn't a fluke after all."
Incredible. He sure knows how to ruin a good moment. Now, she wants to whack his stupid grin clean off again. However, she decided to do something a bit different this time.
"I see. Well, one more thing then..." She whispered in his ear before nearly leaving him frothing with a tight clutching of his crotch. At the same time, her pupils had transformed into pink, lustful hearts.
"I don't care what you look like now, but you're still all mine. These past years have made me too lax from doling out the usual punishment. After we bring home our children, you have a great deal of debt to pay."
She pulled away with a smirk and then playfully jabbed him with a finger to his chest. "Don't forget who has always been top around here, my love. Either our bed is breaking first...or you are."
"...Dammit, woman. You're making me so scaroused right now."
- X o X -
After that, the rest of the walk was spent in peaceful silence. With her husband left vacant and drooling, she finally had time to think and reflect.
While it felt good to flex her power over him again... did she have to make it so embarrassingly crass?! She'd have lost all respect from her children if they heard any of that!
Yet, she couldn't stop the proud, goofy smile from adding to her already beet-red blush. Even if it meant giving her obnoxious husband a win, she didn't mind it, given what it meant for the future.
After all, she couldn't wait to brag to her daughter about the man her precious grandson had become. Albeit it was her idealized mold for him; strong, handsomely kind, and (most importantly) faithfully married to only ONE woman...soon. Her husband's corruption over him be damned.
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- / ! / -
With every step the two gods took from the church, the air became increasingly tense and disquieting.
Many villagers who were just out relaxing or chatting had suddenly dropped everything to trail behind them. Their eyes fervently focused on Aetos as worry and anticipation crawled at their faces.
Upon arriving at the edge of town, a crowd of nearly sixty villagers met the deities. From them, though, only two figures had stepped forward.
The first was an elderly man garbed in a dusty shipwright's uniform and supported by a twisted metal staff. Swirling around him was an unmistakable smell of saltwater and ozone.
The other was a young woman in a makeshift combination of bulky, steel armor and Cydippe's robes. Strapped onto her back was a massive, regal Aspis.
"Our benevolent Lady." The rest of the crowd followed the two in a reverent bow.
However, the sky god was given a varied modicum of respect. "Lord Zeus/Sky-guy/Pervert/Loser/(...)." Which, is to say, close to zero.
"Oi! What the fu-YEEEOW!" Thankfully, his indignant rant was ended prematurely by a sharp heel to his boot.
Hera then turned towards her two executives with a knowing, wry smile. "Ἄργος. Ἀδμήτη. A bit early to gather the children, isn't it?"
In response, Admete's armor visibly quaked as she practically screeched in Hera's face with unbridled excitement. The force and surprise of which had knocked poor Argus to his ass. "BOSS LADY! H-HAS MY LIL' SIS BEEN FOUND!?"
Argus quickly whacked and admonished her for the rude outburst.
...Which was completely misunderstood after she noticed Zeus' flat stare.
"Uhm, and that Maxi-something guy too...?" It took another more meaningful jab to her steel ribs to do the job. "O-oh! I-I mean, please forgive my impertinence, Mother! I was-"
Hera merely shook her head with a rare display of gentle, understanding laughter. "Worry not, child. You're right to be excited."
An almost dreamy gleam overtaking Hera's eyes as a subdued excitement brewed in her heart. "This is the hope we've continued to hold out for."
A slight frown then overtook her face, as a solemn seriousness returned to the air. "Unfortunately, Περίφᾱς was only to be sent as an escort when such news would come."
"So..." Gesturing back to the rest of her gathered children, "Until we return, please continue your roles as you have."
She gave a soft smile before tapping her staff against the ground. The air then thrummed with a rising pressure despite the seemingly innocuous act.
- X o X -
Deep within the village, the remnants of an ancient machine core shuttered to life.
Its awakening sends ripples of divinity through the earth and creates fissures of golden luminosity.
[ ...Reconnecting Machine Core ]
[ ...1%... 38%... 74%... 96%... ]
[ ...Activation Complete ]
[ ...Redirecting Power to Subunit ]
A surge of energy exploded out of the ground and warped the space in front of Hera. An invincible Aegis was shaped from it, encompassing the entire village in its brilliant glory.
- X o X -
Now divided from the two gods, Argus joyously waved after them, with the rest of the Familia following in suit. "Of course, Lady Hera! ασφαλή ταξίδια!"
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Author's Note:
I'm awful at writing married people, let alone women and couples in general. So, I hope the gist of Zeus and Hera's relationship still came through. I wanted it to be both ridiculous and chaotic but still somewhat loving at the same time.
- X o X -
I'll be using a mix of IRL history and FGO lore, so I'll try to explain anything I use as the story goes on.
The Greek pantheon will have their FGO machine origin. I'll explain how it'll be blended into the danmachi mythos as the story goes forward. Just know that it'll be important for past and future events.
With the canon Hera Familia being somewhat unknown, the OC members I'm using are people with close/relevant ties to her.
- Cydippe and Admete were priestesses of Hera
- Argus built a statue of Hera and the Argo
- Phene/Lyra (Periphas' wife) is the vulture that symbolizes good omens.
- I used everyone's Greek names to emphasize their importance. Like when a servant's true name/np is revealed.
Hera's personality is a mix of her character traits from both series. Strophê II is her proud public image (pan-human), and this chapter is her true (danmachi) self.
- X o X -
The joke about spoiled seconds is from how Zeus (pan-human) had 6 wives/consorts before marrying Hera.
- Métis, Themis, Eurynome, Demeter, Mnemosyne, and Leto.
Basically, Hera accepted the sloppiest of seconds. I know that it doesn't make sense with the machine origin, but I couldn't help myself.
- X o X -
Until next time, Peace Out.
