The next morning, Harry Potter could almost smell the Fish and Chips Shop, as they had finally found a dirt road - perhaps a carriage road, Malfoy had suggested, before Harry'd said, "Probably for the haywagon."
Draco Malfoy had shrugged and said, "Same difference."
Harry Potter smirked, and asked, "Surely Young Lord Malfoy's never been in a haywagon?"
Loathe to admit ignorance, Draco Malfoy frowned and said suddenly, "You haven't either!"
To which Harry could do nothing other than laugh. Eventually, he managed to gasp out, "Sure, sure," in a hopefully conciliatory manner.
Draco and Harry rode on for about ten minutes, and then Draco Malfoy suddenly turned to Harry, and asked, "We're almost there, Potter. What do I need to know?"
Harry, who wasn't really used to thinking of absolutely everything he'd learned in his entire childhood, said, "Well, first - don't call anyone a Muggle. They won't understand, and it'll just draw attention."
"Obviously," Draco Malfoy drawled out, "What else?" From his tone, it was clear that he was trying (and mostly failing) to be patient. Harry knew the feeling himself, so he couldn't begrudge.
"Money." Harry said, "Some coins - but those are small potatoes. Real money is paper - sorta like parchment, won't dissolve if it rains." Harry trailed off, realizing that Draco's wide gray eyes indicated that he wasn't paying attention anymore.
"Small Potatoes? For money?" Draco Malfoy said, starting to cackle like Harry imagined Prof McGonagall might if she could ever let herself laugh.
Ugh Harry thought, covering his face, "Not literally, Draco, not literally. Look, we'll just take this easy, stick by me and do what I do."
Harry Potter could see Draco Malfoy's hands flexing. Other people might think it was the reins he was holding, but Harry just knew Draco was considering throttling him. Harry smiled - the one he knew made him look angelic and only slightly crazy. "It'll be fun!" Because nobody did "fly by the seat of your pants" like Gryffindors!
Even in Muggledom.
Especially in Muggledom, with Draco Malfoy who'd never done anything without magic before this trip in his life.
[a/n: Anyone want to bet how long it takes for them to get reported? Leave a review if you want more story!]