About the time that Tony had finally felt settled enough to eat something, someone was knocking on his door.
"Great." he grumbled, mostly to himself. He really was not in the mood. Maybe he'd pretend he was in the shower.
The knocking turned to pounding.
"Ah. Gibbs."
Truly the last person he wanted to deal with tonight. But if he didn't answer, the homeowners association would be calling him. They would only tolerate just so much, even from a federal agent. He sighed and set down the artisan pizza he'd picked up from his favorite shop on the way home.
"Coming!" He yelled at the door. "Jeeze, Gibbs, it's going on ten 22:00, back off a little!"
Gibbs plowed in, ignoring him.
"Ziva said you never showed up for her dinner. Thought I'd make sure everything was okay."
Tony blinked. And blinked again, mouth gaping.
"She really thought I was going to have dinner with her after what happened today?"
"You made it sound like you were."
"Yeah, to save everyone from an all-out brawl in the middle of the bullpen! Nobody needs to hear us airing our dirty team laundry, and she wouldn't have taken no for an answer!"
Gibbs made himself to home on Tony's couch. It looked to Tony as if he was there for the duration of whatever he was there for. Tony still had no clue.
"You're still mad about not being invited to her dinner party?" Gibbs finally blurted.
"Mad? Why would I be mad?" he asked in a fake cheerful voice. "Just because I spent the entire day being chased within an inch of my life, and had to spend it with a crazy Mossad assassin who can't follow orders from her superior officer? Who fired a weapon in an enclosed metal box and almost killed one of us? Who told everyone that my arm injury was a from splinter of wood from a crate, and not a bullet graze that needed ten stitches? Then you all put the cherry on the sundae by letting me know every one of you had a fabulous time at a party I was purposely not invited to?"
"She told us you had other plans."
Gibbs seemed surprised, a bit shocked, even. Tony saw it cross his face, then disappear behind a blank look.
"Right. And no one thought to find out if that was the case. Because normally when I do, I say something about them, even if it's just to annoy McGee."
Tony could see that not only did his boss have no explanation for Ziva's lie, he was unwilling to contemplate it out loud.
"Look, it's late, I wanna eat and go to bed. I'm on desk duty per Ducky until he writes me off."
"We're off rotation for a few days, Director's orders."
Tony huffed an aggrieved sigh.
"And when was anyone going to let me know this? When I showed up dragging at 07:00 tomorrow?"
"I'm telling you now, DiNozzo!"
"Got it. Well, it was nice chatting with you, Gibbs, I'll see you in a few days, then."
But Gibbs wasn't going to be chivvied, not when he could read the closed-off eyes and body language of his second in command like a book.
"Just spit it out, Tony. Not like you don't speak your mind any other time."
"No, but this time I'm pretty sure it's a waste of time and energy, for both of us. You don't want to think about why Ziva excluded me from her little soiree. I don't want to try to explain it to you."
"You think you've got it all figured out, do you, DiNozzo? Got your pride hurt so you're gonna make a big deal out of this?"
"And so it begins."
" What begins? What the hell are you talking about?"
"Let me ask you something, Boss. If Ziva had just shown up fresh off the plane from Israel, no Ari to deal with, not knowing the Director…would you have considered adding her to the team as Kate's replacement?"
"It doesn't matter. She's here now. And she's not an agent, she's a liaison."
"Why doesn't it matter now, Boss?"
"Because I…because arrangements have already been made for her to stay here for a while."
"Does that make sense to you, Boss? A Mossad agent being given access to high level information in the role of liaison?"
"You saying you think she's a spy, DiNozzo?" Gibbs challenged angrily, getting into Tony's space with his stiff Marine posture.
"I'm saying that just because you and the Director owe her, does not entitle her to a classified information clearance level!"
"Who says I owe her anything, DiNozzo? Or the Director? Who have you been talking to?"
Gibbs was furious now, but Tony knew his tells as well as the man knew his; he was trying to distract Tony with his anger, so as not to see his agitation at the question.
"Ah. Hit a nerve, did I?"
"And what nerve would that be, DiNozzo?"
"The one that's afraid I'm going to call your bluff about who actually killed Ari."
" I killed Ari, DiNozzo, you're talking out of your ass!"
"Am I, Boss? I'm not stupid, no matter what all of you have decided to believe. But it's convenient when you need it, isn't it? I play dumb, you all go along with it. Until I get tired of playing. I saw Ari on your basement floor, Boss, saw how he was positioned, how he fell - where the bullet came from. You want me to be smart about all of our other cases, but be a moron regarding that one. The trajectory was all wrong. The caliber was wrong for the hole in his head. At the time I didn't really care who killed the bastard, as long as he was stone cold dead. Figured that in the long run, it didn't really matter, no one else would care, either. Then I got to wondering why. She killed her own half-brother to save someone she barely knew."
"She was his control officer and he was out of control!"
"Then why the hell not take him out weeks ago? Why the fuck let him run amok until he murdered Kate in front of our eyes?"
Tony's sudden fury was frightening, even to Gibbs, who'd seen him angry plenty of times. This was beyond anger; this was visceral.
"She would still be here if Ziva had done her job when she was told, but instead she waits until he's about to murder you too, and just shows up in out of nowhere and finally neutralizes him? What the fuck, Gibbs? Haven't you ever wondered even once what her endgame was? Why she was his control officer, instead of another agent who could be way more objective about the job than a blood relative? Because I wonder every time I look at her!"
"You're reading too much into it, DiNozzo. She was there when she needed to be to save my life, and I can't forget that. And we don't know when she found out about Ari and his obsession. She probably didn't believe he'd turned until he'd killed Kate "
And they all accuse me of living in a dream world…Tony mused to himself.
"Yeah. You're right. I'm making a mountain out of a molehill. I tend to do that, don't I? Get my facts all messed up, lose track of the relevant bits of information, screw up cases…"
"DiNozzo, drop it! It's done, and your whining isn't going to get rid of her. You either learn to work with her, or - "
"Or what, Boss? Say it. I either bury all of my suspicions about her or I'm off the team."
"You learned to work with McGee. You can figure it out with Ziva for a few months."
"No, Gibbs, I can't. I understand that you feel you owe her. And I understand that she brings a lot of skills to the team. But I can't just ignore my gut. I don't trust her, and even if I could explain why, it doesn't matter. You're not interested in hearing it."
"You'd quit my team 'cause you were snubbed from a damned dinner party?"
"I'd quit the team because there was a specific reason behind the snub, and it wasn't just my motormouth. She was isolating me, separating me from the pack."
"Paranoid much, DiNozzo?"
"Well, it is one of your rules, Gibbs. Number forty, I believe. 'If it seems like someone's out to get you, they probably are'.
Gibbs harrumphed and gave a dismissive shrug of a shoulder.
"You don't get a do-over, Tony. You quit my team, I'll replace you. No coming back when you change your mind."
"So much for being irreplaceable, huh? And I won't change my mind. I'm grateful for the years in the team. But I'm not playing third fiddle to McGee and Ziva. And I'm especially not risking my life out in the field because she can't follow orders. She understands chain-of-command just fine. She chooses to ignore it because she sees me as just a dumb cop, and she's got McGee following her lead now, instead of mine. And here's the thing. You don't get a do-over when you find out that maybe you didn't make such a good trade.
"You're stuck with whatever senior field agent will tolerate the bullshit you and Ziva dish out. You're sure as hell not gonna find anyone as loyal and tolerant as what you had in me. It was a good run, but I think we both need to learn some hard lessons here. I have to learn to stop bleeding my soul out for people who aren't willing to do the same for me. And you have to stop using people up and tossing them aside when they won't bend to your will. I'm right about Ziva and you know it, you just don't want to see it. I can't make you see it…and I'm not going to die trying."
"You've been a good second to me, Tony. But you're young, and you don't always see reality for what it is. Sometimes ya gotta just roll with flow and not overthink things so much."
"I'll take that into consideration. I'll have my resignation on the Director's desk first thing tomorrow. I'm sure she can fill in with a TDA until a permanent one can be found."
"Hell, you're not even giving your two week's notice, DiNozzo?"
"I guess that depends on what the Director feels comfortable with. If she's adamant, I'll comply."
Gibbs shook his head, the last half hour or so of conversation still whirling in his brain. He'd come here to resolve things with Tony, not give him an ultimatum. But he had done that, and Tony had given him one back. Now he had to deal with it. He sure as hell hoped he could make it all work like he had before, or he'd never hear the end of it from Jennifer Shepard.