The Animorphs Dementia Cycle - Animorphs with a twist of fate....
We all know Jake, Rachel, Tobias, Cassie, Marco, and Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill. We all know what has happened to them.
But have you ever wondered.... what if....? Yes, "what if". The two words that sparked the creation of fiction, and the foundation of all things of fantasy and science fiction. "What if" is the code of the fan who writes their own version of their favorite stories.
The Dementia Cycle takes "what if" to another level. It gets its name because it looks at Animorphs from another perspective, a different dimension, causing chaos and insanity in its wake. Several slight changes were made in the other universe. Obvious ones. Ones that shouldn't make so much of a difference, but, in fact, do.
The differences can be seen very quickly... if you watch....
So far, a stranger has come upon the Animorphs, one that knows absolutely everything - but she knows absolutely everything, from a very different angle. Her name is Jacqueline - although she prefers being called "Jack". She knows everything Jake knows - but she knows the Animorphs as Maria, Diane, Toniya, Christopher, and Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill - better known as "Axel". Her cousin, Richard, defected. A stranger who found the Escafil Device, Diane, after much trial and error, became an integral part of the team. The next day, Tobias spotted a golden eagle turning into a blond boy. Thinking that it might be David, the traitor who nearly destroyed the Animorphs, he and Rachel tried to confront the boy - only to discover that it was Richard, Rachel's counterpart. After much bickering, the Animorphs have come to tolerate Rich.
The phenomenon which brought Jack and Rich to the others' reality has been dubbed a "Jacqueline Rip" by Ax, much to Jack's embarrassment. Although the actual effects of it have now been witnessed - that objects fade in and out of each reality - the Animorphs are not any closer to discovering why.
... But there is something the Animorphs we know don't know ... or, to be exact, someone. Someone who might be of help.
I hope you enjoy The Dementia Cycle.
Animorphs Dementia #3 - The Comeback
Long before....
My name is Toniya. Yes, T-o-n-i-y-a. It's pronounced "Tuh-NEE-a". But most people call me Tonya, so I just live with it. I spell it that way, too, except on those mandatory tests everybody has to do in school. Only one person calls me Toniya anyway - and only when it's just the two of us.
My race home is a blur; one moment I'm running through the construction site; the next, down a sidewalk; the third, I slammed the front door open and slammed it shut. I locked it behind me - bolt lock, chain lock, even the doorknob lock we don't usually use because the key is lost and no one ever bothered to replace it.
"Toniya? That's you, right?"
I couldn't answer: I was so out of breath I was making weird wheezing sounds. I sounded like a dog coughing.
I heard him get out of his slightly creaky lounge chair. He was in the living room. "Toniya?"
I swallowed hard, trying to get moisture back into my completely dry mouth. I forced my breathing to slow into much less noisy gasps. "Yeah, it's me," I managed to rasp.
He appeared in the doorway leading into the living room. "What's wrong?" he asked me.
I looked at him. He was tall, but not overly so, with hair that's sort of brown - at least, mostly brown, with blond and black thrown in - and eyes like mine, eyes that don't seem to be any certain color at all. He was slim, with a bit of a five o'clock shadow on his chin. He wore a plain dress shirt and slacks - he'd probably put his tie over the back of the sofa, where it would stay until another took its place tomorrow when he came home from work, unless I put it away for him. He was barefoot - he always hated wearing shoes and socks. No doubt his socks - brown ones to match his pants - were on the sofa, too, one on each side of his tie. He's neat in his strange habits.
I ran to him and threw my arms around his neck.
He hugged me back, but I knew he was confused, and worried. "Toniya, what is it?" he asked softly. His voice always gets soft when he demands something.
I couldn't lie to him. He always saw right through me when I tried. But I couldn't tell the whole truth. No way. Not now. "I- I went home through the construction site," I said, hiccuping. I knew I was now grounded for two consecutive life sentences, but I didn't really care right then. "I saw - something." Let him fill in the blank for now. "I- it was- it scared me, that's all." I let him go, and concentrated on talking straight. "I'm fine, Dad."
"You're sure?"
I nodded. "I'm going to bed. I'm exhausted."
He was standing in front of the stairs; he didn't move right away. "If you want to talk later - at any time - you know how to reach me." He kissed me goodnight, then moved out of my way.
I raced up the stairs, then down the hall to my room. I was about to close the door when Dude, my cat, ran in, nearly getting his tail caught in the door. He jumped on my bed as I shut the door. I walked across the room to flop on the bed. Dude sat down beside me, with that humans-are-strange look on his face. I rubbed him on the head, which he likes. "Man, Dude, this is nuts. Maria was right. This is so completely screwed up." He sneezed, then began to clean his whiskers. "Oh, you're a real help. Stupid cat." He curled his tail around his feet, ignoring me. "I should've asked for a dog." He glanced at me, finished with his whiskers. This time his look seemed to say, your mistake, not mine.
I thought about the Andalite. Tell me about your father, he'd asked me. "My- my dad?" I'd stuttered like an idiot. "He's pretty cool, I guess." Trust him, the Andalite had said, before pressing his hand to my forehead. I'd felt a jolt, like someone had punched my brain. Then he yelled at me to run, and I did. I ran and hid with the others.
I shuddered. Sensing my unease, Dude dropped his attitude and butted his head against my shoulder. I rubbed his head, tickling his ears in the way he likes it. A purr burst from his throat.
I looked at him, zoning out a bit. He wasn't a big cat - only two years old - a gray tabby with a kind of short, whip-thin tail and ridiculously long whiskers. He was graceful in a careless way. He always copped an attitude unless I was upset or food was, in any way, involved. He loved to chase anything that moved, including string, human feet, and his tail.
Dude stopped purring. A glazed look crossed his face. My hand felt numb. I brought my hand closer to my face. I wiggled my fingers; they moved stiffly, as if I'd sat on them for several hours. Thirty seconds after I removed my hand, Dude yawned, went to my pillow, curled up in the middle of it, and dozed off.
What had just happened?
Then I remembered what the Andalite had said. About touching any animal, about concentrating, about determination.
About morphing.
I grinned to myself, then, closing my eyes, concentrated.
My eyes flew open as my cheeks became incredibly itchy and a horrifying grinding sound emerged from my back.
The room had become much brighter....
To be honest, I don't remember the girl whose memory that was. At least, not very well. In fact, she too is a memory, a distant one - almost a dream.
Whoever she is, or was... I'm not her.
I am Toniya. I don't take those stupid tests - my dad teaches me at home because I definitely can't go to school anymore. Everyone who knows me calls me Toniya or Tonni; mostly I'm not called Tonya anymore. I have an incredibly understanding dad, just like she did, but I have an uncle, too. He's my best friend. My uncle, I mean. Yeah, my dad, too.
And Jack, my "prince". And Chris, my tie to humanity. And Maria, my tie to utter instinct. And Diane, the bridge between humanity and instinct - intuition.
I have six very different best friends. Each of them, both literally and emotionally, are family to me.
To them, I am a friend, a sister, a daughter, a shorm.
To the rest of the world, I am a freak.
Well, to most of the rest of the world.
To some, I'm a danger...
... and, to another, part of a dream come true.
CHAPTER 12
Tobias
She's gone.
Something had seemed wrong about Rachel not answering. I don't know - maybe it just seemed normal that she could thought-speak out of morph now, so I had expected an answer. Like I said, I don't know. I flew out of the hayloft just in time to see the last of Rachel fade from view.
The others looked up at me, as surprised by what I said as I was to have to say it.
Jack and Jacqueline had equally shielded dread in their expressions. Cassie looked stunned. Marco's jaw tightened as he frowned. Ax... for some reason, Ax scanned the others with his stalk eyes, then stared at me. Something about him didn't look right. Who is gone? he asked.
Who? I repeated. Who else? Rachel! She faded out!
"Faded..." Cassie's eyes went wide. "Oh, no!"
Ax was still staring at me. What's up, Ax-man? I asked him privately. He was worrying me. What was it that didn't look right about him? He still had four legs, four eyes, and no mouth. He looked... his color wasn't quite right, but that was the lighting. The same lighting that made him look discolored made him look a little bigger. Mentally I shrugged.
It seems there is another problem, Ax said, speaking to everyone.
"What?" Jack asked.
He looked at her... and smirked. I had never seen Ax smirk. Look smug, yeah, but never smirk. I do not know, my princess, he said. Do you?
Ax had looked at everyone.
Now everyone looked at him.
"Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill," Rich said, frowning.
To my fellow Andalites, he replied. He bowed slightly. The few humans I call friend call me 'Axel' in return. He turned all four eyes toward Jack. What is this, oh prince? he muttered, sounding cold, suspicious. Who are these strangers, and what is... he- Ax - Axel? - glared at Rich, ...-doing here? I have never seen an Andalite truly scowl. I did now. So he has made his own Animorphs, then?
"Animorphs, yes," Jack answered him. "His, no. Axel, meet 'Prince' Jake, Cassie, Marco, and Tobias. Everybody, meet Axel - the 'Ax' from my side of existence."
Axel looked around again. I have missed something, he said finally, his tone bordering on cynical. One moment I am with Maria, Chris, and Toniya. Then Maria became him- he pointed at Marco, -Chris her- he pointed at Cassie, -and Toniya was replaced by... you. He pointed at me. I may only be an aristh, but even ones so low-ranked as I know that should not occur.
"That's.... that's not Ax," Marco said.
"Didn't we just say that?" Rich sneered.
"He just said something humble," Marco continued, "without being accused of being arrogant first. Now that is definitely not Ax."
"He was joking," Jack said.
"Ax also doesn't joke," Marco pointed out.
I both am quite humble and modest, and contain a healthy sense of humor, Axel said. Not to mention, an infallible biological clock, a greater sense of loyalty than any other creature on Earth, and a serious difficulty with understanding what little logic I have found in human behavior.
"Nevermind," Marco said, shaking his head. "That's Ax."
"Still as smug and verbose as ever," Rich muttered.
Axel looked at him with one stalk eye. Still as aloof and no doubt as foolish as ever, he replied.
I'm not liking this new Ax, I told Jake privately.
Ugh, he agreed.
Then he glanced up at me. He knew.
Marco, Cassie, I spoke only to them, think something at me.
What's he want? Marco wondered when he glanced up. Then he added while keeping a straight face, I wonder if Tobias tastes like chicken.
Huh? Cassie thought, looking confused.
Congratulations, I said to all three of them. We all now have thought-speak. And, by the way, Marco, I could get you from here. With these eyes I could put the best seagull to shame, you know.
Marco took a half step backward and ran his fingers through his hair. This is awesome! he said. Unlike me, he didn't keep quiet. Now we don't have to worry about anyone overhearing us. We can discuss plans in the open! No more hiding!
Jack looked at him funny, then smiled. Never had that problem, she said. We just sat here looking like we were doing homework.
On rare occasions we actually did it, Rich added in a soft voice. The two of them traded blank glares.
I believe... this is farewell.
We all looked at Axel - just as he started to fade away.
"NO!" Jack cried. In three steps she was next to Axel. She tried to grab his arm, but her fingers only held on for a moment before they sank into, then through him. Her hand clenched into a fist as his arm disappeared, along with the rest of him.
"This has to be happening everywhere," Cassie said, when the shock finally started to fade. "People fading in, fading out, being replaced by other people... same with buildings, trees, everything."
Jake frowned. "Mom and Dad are freaking because someone replaced our minivan with a station wagon. Only I know the key works with the new car. I didn't know how to tell them that."
Jack tried not to smile. "Bet my folks are just as happy about that."
"What I don't get is Ax and Ax," Marco said, crossing his arms.
"What about the alien boys?" Rich asked snidely.
"That," Jack said. "They're both guys. I mean, we got me and Jake, Maria and Marco, Chris and Cassie, but Ax and Axel are both male?"
"Maybe what affects humans doesn't affect Andalites," Jake suggested.
Suddenly my heart just stopped. Just... stopped... dead.
Who's Toniya's father? I asked.
Jack looked up at me. So did Rich.
"Oh, man," Marco muttered.
"Aristh Elfangor," Jack answered quietly.
The silence seemed to last forever.
"Aristh Elfangor?" Marco echoed finally.
Jack shrugged a little. "We call him Al."
This silence did last forever.
"Elfangor's alive?" Jake demanded.
Jack gave him a funny look. "Why shouldn't he be? Was he hurt in your timeline?"
Marco covered his face with his hands. "Oh, man..."
CHAPTER 13
Toniya
I'm a girl trapped in the form of a hawk, but able to be human again for short periods of time.
I can turn into any creature I touch.
I have a father who's an alien, while my human mom disappeared when I was little.
Alien slugs have taken over a good percentage of my state. All there is to fight them is me, four of my friends, my dad, and my dad's little brother, who, unlike my dad, still looks like a centaur with a scorpion tail, eyestalks, and no nose or mouth.
But I still have to water the lawn. Go figure.
A car slowed down, then stopped, right next to my house. I looked up with lame human eyes. A kind of young-looking man stepped out, taking off his sunglasses as he looked at me. "Do you know how to get to the Bordle Building?"
I knew - I saw it every time I flew downtown. I gave him exact directions. He put his sunglasses back on, thanked me, and, after getting back in his car, closed the door.
As the car pulled away from the curb, it disappeared.
I blinked. "Huh?" I said aloud. Then, quoting Axel - or "Uncle Ax", as I sometimes call him - I said in the same, cynical tone he uses, "I have missed something." I hurried to turn off the hose and went inside. "Father?" I called. Sometimes he works at home, and today was one of those times.
"Yes, Toniya."
I followed the sound of his voice to the den. It's not so much a den as much as a library. The room is a maze of bookshelves. I navigated it expertly to find my dad at the desk under the window. Dad, like most Andalites, is claustrophobic. I wasn't until I became a hawk permanently. "Dad, a car just disappeared in front of our house." He nodded without looking at me, but didn't answer. "That hasn't become normal yet, has it? That's not supposed to happen, right?"
He frowned a little. "Correct." Finally, he straightened in his chair and swiveled to look at me. "But I'm afraid such things are getting unnaturally common."
I flopped into the overstuffed chair that was placed next to the desk just so we could talk here. Next to me was an ashtray holder, even though we don't allow smoking on our property. We'd thrown out the ashtray that had come with it. After all, it served another purpose: as someplace to "sit" when I couldn't use the chair. "Fill me in, Dad."
"You said that Jack disappeared without a trace." I nodded. "Aximili usually has visited at this time when he has, in fact, not."
"Then there's Rachel and that other Aximili," I said.
"Yes." The phone rang. Dad picked it up. "Alan Fangor speaking." He paused. "Hello, Jack." I sighed in relief. "Yes, she is here." He frowned. "A car just disappeared in front of our house." He glanced at me. Understanding, I picked up the second phone on his desk. Old-fashioned conference calling.
I nearly died in relief to hear Jack's voice, even though the first thing I heard was, "-ious trouble. Axel was here for a moment but faded out. Rich just got back from a fly-around and said he saw Tonni going inside, so I called as fast as I could."
"Rich?" I echoed. My voice came out as a squeak.
"Yeah." Jack sounded bitter. "Rich. The others found him. Long story."
"What do you mean, Axel faded out?"
"Hard to explain." Translation: I can't say over the phone. "How's the headcount?"
"Wait, where are you?" I asked, coming to my senses. "Where have you been? What happened?"
"Too long a story. Just get to Chris' barn quick, okay? We're getting together."
"We just were together two hours ago," I said, choosing my words carefully so not to reveal anything a phone tap would be interested in. After all, Dad and I could listen to the same conversation by picking up the phone. If Jack was home, then her Controller sister, Tara, could listen in as easily as I was. "You were a no-show."
"Sorry about that. Oh, we're going to have company, so don't take up too much room." She forced herself to laugh. Dad and I traded guarded looks. "Your dad can drive you, right?"
"That will not be a problem," Father said. "We'll be there soon."
"Cool. Thanks, Al. Later." She hung up.
Dad pulled up to the barn and parked the car. He didn't glance up as he walked into the barn. As usual, I flew through the doors of the hayloft-
-and pulled up sharply. YAAH!
A hawk with a crimson tail was perched in my favorite spot.
I fluttered to perch on the lip of the open hayloft door. Shoo, I muttered at the other hawk, even though it couldn't understand me anymore than if I was talking to it out loud. That's my spot.
There's more than enough room for both of us.
With hawk vision I stared at the odd hawk. It stared right back, something no normal hawk would do. Whoa, I breathed. Who are you?
You know Rachel?
I felt my heart drop to my talons. The interrogation we'd given her was pretty fresh in my mind. Tobias.
The other hawk looked down. She's okay, he said, sounding relieved.
"You doubted the mighty Rachel?" someone quipped.
I looked down just as Dad walked in the barn door, and everyone turned to stare.
Jack stood next to a guy who could have been her twin - Jake, obviously. He had the same intent face, same serious air, same ancient eyes. Nearby a cute guy with tanned skin and short, brown-black hair stood with a half-smile frozen to his face. Marco. It had to be, since he'd been the one to make the joke. A black girl with extremely short hair was gaping at Father.
And a tall, actor-like-beautiful guy with a huge scowl stared at Dad, too.
Rich.
Dad looked around at the others.
"Elfangor?" Jake said. It sounded like a question. Dad didn't respond.
"It's okay, Al," Jack said. "These are who they look like."
Still Dad was quiet. He looked up into the rafters, meeting Tobias' hawk glare.
A glare so much like my own.
There's only one reason Dad was probably not doing what he wanted to.
Andalites don't cry the same way humans do.
And Dad, no matter how many years would pass, could never be fully human.
Tobias was me.
Me, without him.
Hello, Elfangor, Tobias said. His voice matched his hawk's face - emotionless. Incapable of expression.
"Hello, Tobias," Father replied. "Rachel has told me of you." Somehow he broke eye contact with Tobias. "She has told us of all of you, as has... an Axel we are unfamiliar with."
"Ax is ours," Marco said. "Axel's yours. Let's do it that way."
"Agreed." Dad frowned. "Rachel has been with us for two hours."
The others looked at each other. "She disappeared twenty minutes ago," Jake said, "tops."
Jack's been missing for almost two weeks, I added.
Jack frowned. "Two days here."
Marco groaned and rubbed his forehead. "Bad enough we traded Xena for traitor-" he stole a glance at Rich, who made a point not to look at Marco, "-but we've got time differences going on? What's with that?" He looked at Jack, as if she had the answer.
Jack shrugged. "Beats me. Just because Ax named this stupid thing after me doesn't mean I understand the slightest bit of it."
"It would help if you explained what you have figured out so far," Dad said. "We might be able to help if we knew what you know."
As Jack began to explain, I looked more closely at the others. The resemblances were eerie, right down to the shape of Jack's and Jake's eyebrows to the exact way Marco parted his hair, a perfect match to Maria's. The only things more eerie were how everyone else stared at Father, and Tobias.
I couldn't imagine what he could be like. I had to force myself not to stare at him in absolute shock. Here was a guy, who was me. But, not only was he a guy, but he hadn't had Dad's support from when he got trapped. From what Rachel had said, he didn't have anyone to turn to at all.
I would have fallen apart if it hadn't been for Dad. I would have just let my soul go and lived as a partially-albino Egyptian Crested Hawk for the rest of my life. I wouldn't have met Axel, or been given my morphing capabilities back. Without Dad, I wouldn't be alive. It's that simple.
How did Tobias manage to do what I couldn't imagine? How had he lived without a single person who cared?
I had only had one person who cared. But Father cares a lot about me. I don't know anyone who's as close to their father as I am to mine.
How had Tobias dealt with it? Could I have done the same?
I know that, to the others - the others that make up the Animorphs I know - I'm a sort of warning. They're all afraid of me, in a way. I'm the perfect example of what happens when you stay in morph too long.
There was no doubt in my mind that Tobias set the same example for his own Animorphs.
But I don't think he was scared of me. I know I was scared of him.
Tobias scared me.
A lot.
CHAPTER 14
Tobias
Hello, Elfangor.
Was that me? Was that deadpan voice, that computer recording, really me? Me, saying hello to Elfangor, the man who had given us the morphing abilities, the one who given us a fighting chance... the one who given me life?
That was me?
"Hello, Tobias," Elfangor replied. "Rachel has told me of you." Then he looked away and said something I didn't quite hear.
I couldn't believe it. I had imagined this moment every day since finding out Elfangor was my father. What I would say. What he would say. What had happened? Why had none of it happened?
Was it because this wasn't the Elfangor I wanted to talk to? Or was it more because he was human?
I don't know. For some reason, seeing Elfangor as a human was disappointing. It wasn't that he was butt ugly - he looked like a good guy, with brown hair with blond and black mixed in, a serious face with eyes like my human ones, eyes that didn't seem quite certain what color they were supposed to be. He wasn't tall or imposing, just an average height and build. Sort of what I imagined I'd look like in ten years, with darker hair.
As the others talked, I saw Elfangor do a sort of strange half step. Toniya, Rich, and Jack didn't seem to notice, but Marco raised an eyebrow. Jake and Cassie glanced at him, trying to figure out what he was doing.
With my hawk-eye view - not to mention my hawk eyes - it was easy to see.
Elfangor had slipped off his shoes.
I guess he didn't like shoes. That's okay. I don't either, now. They seem confining, restricting. Like lead weights. Human feet are lame.
Jack began explaining what little we knew to Toniya and Elfangor. It quickly became obvious that Toniya wasn't paying attention. Tobias?
She was talking to me? Yeah?
I... She'd been looking at me with her odd, gray-brown eyes: now she looked down toward the others. What was it like? I mean, without Fa- without Elfangor. Who did you live with? Your mom?
My mom disappeared when I was little.
Oh. She paused, still not looking at me. Mine too. But I still had Dad.
Mostly I got shuttled between aunts and uncles.
Oh, yuck! Then she cringed. Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean-
I sighed. No, it's all right. It really was pretty nasty. None of them cared. They just kept me long enough to make one of the others feel guilty, then shoved me down the line. They didn't like it, I didn't like it, nobody liked it. Nobody liked me.
That can't be true.
I was shuttled all over the country, I answered coldly. I didn't mean to sound harsh. I didn't want to. It just came out that way. Each year I'd end up in a different school than the year before. You know how many relatives we have. You know what they're like.
Uncle Martin?
Aunt Martha. I spent a year and a half with her.
Oh.... that was so inhumane of whichever bastard sent you there. Forgive my Portuguese.
I would have smiled in spite of myself, but my mouth isn't exactly made for that.
CHAPTER 15
Toniya
Forgiven. You're exactly right, though. That was the absolute worst time of my life. Worse than this.
I don't doubt it. I looked down at Dad. I can't imagine life without him, I said quietly. How could you stand it? How did you hold on?
I had the others, he said. He looked downward too, toward the others. Toward Jake, Marco, and Cassie. Sure, Marco made cracks about it, which hurt sometimes... but they were there for me, right from the start. Especially Rachel. I cringed at that. Um... I don't want to... pry, or anything... but... um...
I would have smiled at his tongue-tiedness. You sound like you swallowed a live mouse. I'll just say it. There's nothing between Richard and me. I looked down at the familiar white-blond head, feeling my heart freeze. Nothing, I repeated.
Marco looked up at us, first at Tobias, then me. The others had fallen silent. "Hey, birdbrains," he said. "We know how much Jack and Jake, and Rich and Rachel look alike. Care to give the curious a Look-a-like contest here? You guys verses Jake and Jack."
Tobias and I looked at one another. Want to? I asked him.
I was about to ask you the same thing, he replied with a chuckle.
I don't see where it'd hurt anything, I said.
Let's do it, he agreed, spreading his wings.
We fluttered to the floor. Let's see how illogical the same morph is for the same person, I suggested. We morph on three.
One... two... he counted.
Three! we said at the same time, and concentrated.
At the same time, dirty blond hair sprouted from two very different hawk heads, blinding us both. I can't see! Tobias told me.
Neither can I, I agreed, irony in my voice. Guess we'll have to judge by how freaked out the others look. Tobias laughed.
I began to grow into my hair. The heavy black crests on my forehead became eyebrows. My beak sealed on itself, softening into my human nose, and a new mouth appeared below it. My wings lost feathers, growing into human arms, but they ended in single fingers. More fingers began to sprout before I had hands. My talons grew Hork-Bajir size before shrinking into human feet. The last things to develop were my hands. I brushed my hair out of my eyes.
The others were staring at us in utter disbelief.
I looked at Tobias. He was my height, dressed in bike shorts and a tight tee shirt. He was kind of lanky, like I am, with limbs that seem a little too long, with mussed dirty-blond hair cut at the base of his head, making it about four inches shorter than mine, which goes to my neck. His eyes were like mine and Dad's, half sort-of violet, half an unnamable color. His shoulders were a bit wider, and he was skinnier than me.
He forced the corners of his mouth up into a vague, unpracticed smile. I did too.
"That was totally freaky," Marco said, breaking the silence.
"Morphs never make sense," Cassie said, shaking her head, "but somehow yours made the exact same lack of sense."
"Total synchronization," Jack breathed. She raised one of her hands to her face, and bit her knuckle. Then she took her knuckle out of her mouth. "That was freaky," she said finally.
"It's good to see you again, Tonya."
It took me a moment to realize that someone was talking to me. I haven't been called "Tonya" in close to a year. I looked toward a stall.
Rich was looking at me, his expression carefully molded to be as blank as my own. "It's been awhile," he added.
I looked away, not answering him. I forced a smile towards Tobias. "I think Jack and Jake win," I said.
He shrugged slightly. "That's okay," he said. "It's not like they get anything for winning."
"Actually," Dad said slowly. The other Animorphs - the ones I didn't know - looked at him. Tobias looked at him, too. "Actually, I would call it a tie."
Slowly, Marco nodded. "Me, too," he said. Then his shoulders slouched. "I can't believe I'm going to say this," he said, "but I miss Rachel. It hasn't even been an hour yet. I've lost it."
"Twenty minutes here, two hours home," Jack said. "Two days equals two weeks. Ax said that this probably wasn't a Sario Rip because it affected space and not time. Obviously it does, if there's a lag back home."
"So it is a Jacqueline Rip?" Marco teased.
Jack cringed. "Don't remind me."
"Is it an equal lag, though?" Cassie asked. "Is it just a random flux, or is there a steady difference?"
"There is a difference of a factor of 6.5," Dad said. He leaned heavily against the doorway of the barn, crossing his arms, thinking. "For every second spent here, six and a half seconds pass in our universe."
"Rachel said that it seemed to get darker as she passed between dimensions," I said. "Obviously, it's possible to see the change as you go from the slower universe to the faster one, but not the other way around."
"It probably also depends on how fast you go between them," Marco suggested. Then he thumped himself in the side of the head. "Okay, someone shoot me now, this is starting to make mathematical sense. Of course, if it made logical sense, it'd be even better. Hold off shooting me until this makes complete sense."
"We'll do our best to restrain ourselves," Rich said, smirking slightly.
Marco looked at him in surprise. "Did you just respond to a joke without a death threat?" he asked.
"I don't like wasting my breath," Rich replied. "Besides, if I'm stuck here, why should I sulk?" He looked at me again. I looked at Dad, avoiding Rich's eyes.
Tobias glanced at Rich. Give me Rachel anyday, he muttered.
Same here, I agreed. He keeps looking at me.
You keep looking at him, he pointed out.
I can feel his eyes. I wish he'd stop that!
You two aren't even on good terms, are you?
Once we were, I said quietly. But we never will be again. Tobias didn't say anything to that. I was glad. I didn't want to talk about it.
I didn't want to talk about the crush I'd had on Rich ever since I first saw him, since he'd smile at me once in awhile, in the halls. He vaguely knew me, in the beginning: we had math class together, though we sat on opposite sides of the room. We saw each other in the halls sometimes.
I remembered, when I first became trapped, how much Maria avoided me, how little Jack had to say. I remembered Chris' pity. I even remember, with regret, how withdrawn Dad had become for a little while, though he was a great deal of help in teaching me to deal with two sets of instincts. Of them all, only Rich still treated me exactly the same. Not exactly like a friend, but as a person. He made me feel the most human. Sure, he never called me Toniya, or Tonni, only Tonya, but I didn't mind. I'd still been used to it then. I appreciated it, because Tonya, to me, became what was human in me. Toniya was the bird, and the Andalite, in me. Tonya was my human self. Rich helped me to keep hold of that human.
When I looked at him, I felt that. I felt Tonya wanting to smile, maybe even hug him. But I felt the hawk's disgust with that idea, the discomfort with the idea of being crushed to something else. And I felt my Andalite heritage, too, the part of me which truly was Toniya, the bitterness and anger. The strong pain of being betrayed.
I glanced at Tobias. He glanced back.
Suddenly, irrationally, I felt jealous of him.
Why?
He had never known Dad.
I know, that sounds absolutely ridiculous. I love my father, more than anyone, and have no idea what I would do without him.
But he raised me, without my mother. My mother disappeared when I was little. From the time I was five, the only one to raise me was an Andalite trapped in the body of a human. He raised me the only way he could: as another Andalite, in another human body.
I have human instincts and hawk instincts, but I also have a human soul, and an Andalite soul.
Never having known Dad, Tobias only had to deal with two personas of himself.
I have to deal with three.
CHAPTER 16
Tobias
The meeting broke up slowly, ending with me and Toniya demorphing, Jack and Rich going up into Cassie's hayloft to sit on opposite sides of it, and the others heading home.
Tobias?
I looked at Toniya. I couldn't get over the strangeness of her morph. It was an off-white bird with gray-brown eyes and a heavy black crest that swooped from her forehead. The crest resembled small black wings, giving her an elegant, scholarly appearance, kind of like how the feather formation of a great horned owl makes it look powerful and dangerous. Her beak and talons were gray. Her wings were longer than mine, and somewhat bowed, making her more streamlined. What kind of bird are you, anyway? I teased.
Partially-albino Egyptian Crested Hawk, she replied. Most aren't as pale as me, and their eyes aren't this color - more like yours. Cool, huh?
You morphed an exotic hawk?
She laughed. Exotic? Hardly! You don't have crested hawks?
Egypt isn't exotic?
She laughed again. Okay, so you guys don't have my kind here, she said. Egyptian crested hawks are a group of crested hawks who were given our common name because our crests resemble the eye make-up of ancient Egyptians - you know, the coal used to make their eyes look longer.
I thought about it. Yeah, her crest sort of did that. I chuckled. I just got a common old red-tail, I said.
Common? She sounded confused. Huh. I thought you were a Harbinger's hawk, though you don't have the red-tipped wings.
Harbinger's? Never heard of them.
She laughed. Just as I've never heard of a red-tail, she replied. Tobias, she said again, instantly serious, do you want to come home for awhile?
Come... home? I echoed carefully.
I think you need time with Elfangor, she said. There's bound to be plenty you want to ask him. And I know there's plenty that he'll want to ask you.
I don't want-
Oh, come off it. You won't be intruding on anything. She sighed. I know this must be strange, Tobias. I was surprised when Rachel said you knew, even though you'd never known your dad. You might be afraid, Tobias, but I think you need this.
I looked down.
Below, Elfangor was looking up at me. A sad smile crossed his face. "I..." He sighed a little. "I must say that I both look forward to, and am overwhelmed, with the idea of speaking to you, Tobias," he said finally. "The feelings I have about it are countless and many contradict themselves." I chuckled a little, uncertainly. Elfangor's smile grew a little. "I would like to know you, Tobias," he added quietly.
What could I say to that?
Sure, I said. I'll come for dinner.
***
I flapped quickly after Toniya. Her longer wings caught the fading thermals easier than mine did. Where do we morph to go in? I asked.
Toniya giggled. We don't, she replied. Follow me. She dipped her right wing, turning smoothly, then started descending.
I was about a hundred feet behind and two hundred above her, trying not to look like I was following her. I banked right and brought my wings tighter to my body, picking up speed, cutting the distance between us. It's weird, I said. I mean, you live where I did.
Isn't it? she agreed. Then she yelped. Pull up! She angled both wings up, shooting almost six feet straight up from sheer momentum. We'd been heading for an attic window, one located away from the street. Instead we landed on the roof.
What's wrong? I asked, folding my wings. My talons found it easy to grip the rough shingles.
Our house, she said. This isn't it.
I looked over the roof's peak. Elfangor's car - a bright yellow convertible, definitely not what I would have thought he would choose to drive - pulled into the driveway, jerking to a sudden stop. Elfangor opened the door quickly, staring at something in front of him.
It's not our house, Dad, Toniya said. We climbed to the peak of the roof, where he could see us. The window's shut.
I heard the front door open. "What do you want?" a rude voice demanded. I stiffened, startled.
I had never regretted not going home after I became trapped as a hawk. No one cared about me anyway.
Especially not that voice.
Elfangor regarded the person we couldn't see. His eyes narrowed, and his mouth turned downward into a harsh scowl. "Do you know where Anderson Street is?" he asked in a toneless voice.
"That way," the voice snapped. "I know you from somewhere. Who are you?"
Elfangor glanced up at the roof. At me. "Tobias _____," he replied, using my name. I didn't have the same last name he did: I suppose the Ellimist changed it, or something.
The person below stomped off the stairs and came as close to running as he probably ever had in his entire life.
Oh my God, Toniya whispered. Is that-
Yes, I replied softly.
"What do you know of that boy?" he demanded, grabbing Elfangor's arm with one of his greasy, beefy hands.
Elfangor's glare turned on him, and his scowl grew even harsher. "What did you?" he replied coldly.
"That boy," the man snapped, "that worthless, arrogant little brat, ran away months ago. Good riddance, I'd say, if I didn't have to pay fines for it!" he snarled. "Social services came here, dared call me a bad guardian! Bah! Bad kid, I tell you! Always off doing whatever he wanted, never giving a shit about what I told him to do. Bad guardian? That kid belonged in a delinquent farm. Now where is he?" he demanded. "Where is he, so I can get these damn social workers off my back and put that little shit where he belongs!"
For the first time, he truly looked at Elfangor, and, in doing so, decided to let go of his arm and take two steps backwards.
Elfangor's expression was that dangerous.
"Tobias is where he belongs," Elfangor said in a quiet, cold, dagger-like voice. "And so are you." He turned away, getting back in the car, and drove away.
Confused, afraid, the person below watched Elfangor's car pull away. Then, shakily, he went back into the house.
For a long time I just stood there, thinking it over in my head.
You okay, Tobias?
I jerked a little, opening my wings slightly, before catching myself. I'd forgotten Toniya was there. Yeah, I replied. I would have smiled if I could have.
Elfangor had stood up for me.
My father had stood up for me.
Yeah, I said again. I'm okay.
That's good, Toniya said. A smile appeared in her voice. Dad wants to meet us at Burger King. He doesn't want to miss our dinner date.
I chuckled. I couldn't remember a time when I'd ever been happier. Neither do I.
***
The three of us walked into Burger King, me in a pair of Toniya's sneakers and jeans. Funny how prepared they were - in the car's trunk there were three changes of clothing and three pairs of sneakers. There was also a suitcase. "Trust Dad to be prepared for dinner for everybody," Toniya joked. "Plenty of clothes for me, because we sometimes go to dinner together, but the suitcase has a change of everybody else's, since there's no telling when we'll have company."
"And there's the unfortunate rule of no shirt, no shoes, no service," Elfangor added. "I suppose they don't serve many of my people."
"Your people don't generally eat in restaurants," Toniya giggled.
Elfangor nodded. "True. We make due with what's lying around. What do you two want?"
"Chicken tenders," Toniya replied, sliding into a booth. "And some french fries. I haven't had french fries in ages." I slid into the seat across from her.
"Ah. You want to go cannibal tonight," Elfangor said, smiling at her teasingly. Then he turned to me. "Tobias?"
For a moment my voice caught in my throat. Elfangor had just totally paid back for all my years of hell, and he called me by name. I don't know. I just felt overwhelmed for a moment. "Sounds good," I said. "I'll have that too."
"Two cannibal orders," he said. His smile widened. "Just water? Or do you want carbonation and sugar added?"
"Sounds good," Toniya said. "I'll have a Sprite."
"Coke for me," I said.
Elfangor nodded a little. "I'll be right back." He left to get on line.
I looked at Toniya. "I can't believe this is happening," I said. "It's just too unreal."
She smiled. "I think it's cool."
"It is." I looked over my shoulder, at where Elfangor stood third in line. "It's just... this is... so..." I shook my head, turning back around. "It's so normal. I've never had normal. And it seems so natural."
"Doesn't it?" she agreed. "I feel like, 'Okay, I have a twin brother', even though I never did before. Have a brother, I mean. Closest I could come is Axel."
"I feel..." I tried to put it into words. I couldn't think of the word I wanted. There was one - just one - okay, maybe a few. But they were specific. I knew if I just had one I'd know the others. But what was it?
"Adopted?" Toniya suggested, giggling.
I laughed. "Yeah," I said. "And free. And happy." I looked back at Elfangor again. He was placing our order. "I mean, I've never actually gone to a fast food place, sat down, and had a conversation. It was always like, 'Eat, don't look up, don't say anything'."
Toniya leaned over, taking my hand in hers. "It's okay, Tobias," she said quietly. "I have a vague idea of what you had to go through, because I know the people you had to deal with. And that vague idea scares the hell out of me. I understand."
I looked at her. "You're better at facial expressions than I am," I said. I wanted to change the subject.
She sat back down, letting my hand go. As she had said, she understood. "Part of Dad's curriculum," she said. "Calculus in the World, Midsummer Night's Dream, Physics as Used in Everyday Life, The Seven Billions Ways to Smile. He's pretty thorough."
Elfangor put the tray on the table. "Vandals," he said. "The prices went up again." He put a medium soda, small fry, and chicken tenders box in front of each of us, then stood there a moment. Who would he sit next to?
The pause seemed to last forever, but finally Elfangor slid in beside Toniya. I was a little disappointed, but mostly glad. This was the first time Elfangor and I were really getting face-to-face. It was still too early to be side-by-side. He'd gotten a chef's salad and what I guess was either Coke or Diet Coke, or maybe root beer; his drink was dark, like mine.
"Ugh, Dad," Toniya said. "You eat way too many greens."
"Old habits die hard," he replied. "I wasn't sure what you liked to put on your food, Tobias, so I got a lot of everything." He gestured slightly at the pile of ketchup and mustard packets on the tray.
Toniya and I reached for the same mustard packet; she giggled, snatched it, and threw it at me, then took another one. I picked the one she'd thrown out of my lap and tried to tear it, but I had lost the technique. It took me four tries to get it open. When I did, it ripped down the side. Mustard dripped all over the table and my food. I glanced up, cringing a little, but Elfangor simply stuck a forkful of lettuce in his mouth with one hand, and with the other he reached over to the napkin dispenser and, taking one out, held it out to me. "Thanks," I said, taking it. I wiped the mustard off the table, then reached for a second packet. I managed to get it open without making a mess.
We ate quietly, but it was a nice quiet, the quiet of people comfortable with one another who really had nothing to say. Every once in a while I'd glance at Elfangor, or Toniya. If they caught me, they'd smile slightly. Once, when I was taking a sip of Coke, Toniya caught me glancing at her. She stuck out her tongue, which had a french fry on it, and crossed her eyes. I nearly spit Coke out all over them. Toniya burst into giggles, nearly choking on her french fry. Elfangor glanced at both of us, shook his head tolerantly, and ate one of Toniya's french fries.
As we were leaving, some kids came into the restaurant. One of them glanced at me, stopped, did a double take, then grabbed my arm. "Tobias?" she said.
I looked at her - and stared. "Rachel!"
She grabbed me right there, in the doorway of the Burger King, and kissed me. "Oh my God!" she said. "What are you doing here?"
"Having dinner," I replied, confused and a little embarrassed. "What about you? When'd you get back?"
"She hasn't gone back, unless I missed something," one of the kids who'd come in with Rachel said. She was kind of short, with deeply tanned skin and long, thick brown-black hair she wore loose over her shoulders.
"Rachel isn't back," another, an African-American boy about an inch taller than the deeply tanned girl, said. "Toniya and Al are."
"Who knows anymore?" a third said, rolling her eyes and shrugging. She was kind of tall, but not as tall as Rachel, with blond hair and sharp green eyes. "This whole stupid thing has me so confused I've stopped trying to figure it out."
There were two other kids with them, ones who were obviously brothers... and yet they weren't. "That's not a good mindset to be in," one chided the third speaker. "Hello, Tonni, Al."
"Hello... Al," the other echoed in a quieter, shakier voice.
"Tobias," Rachel said, gesturing to each of the kids in the order they'd spoken in, "these are Maria, Chris, Diane, and Axel. And you know Ax, of course."
"The house," Toniya said. She looked a little pale. "As I was flying toward the attic window it suddenly became shut. We must have crossed back."
"Actually, maybe everything but you did," Maria said. "Could we all hop into the car and discuss this?"
Chris smiled a little. "I thought you were starving," he said, raising an eyebrow.
"I'm allowed to lose my appetite, aren't I?" Maria retorted. "Oh, and, Al? Can we stop in the drive-through on our way out?"
CHAPTER 17
Toniya
It was a little crowded, but we all managed to fit in the car.
Maria, Diane, Axel, and Dad sat in the front seat, Maria, Diane, and Axel munching burgers. In the back, Rachel and Chris sat on either side of Ax. Chris held me in his lap; Rachel held Tobias in hers. The top of the car was down, making it more comfortable for Tobias and me. Neither of us like roofs much.
"So," Rachel finished, "here we are. We all decide to have dinner and who do we run into but you guys."
How long has it seemed to you? I asked Rachel.
"Hours," she replied. "I'm sleeping over with Axel, Ax, and Diane tonight at the scoop."
"It might be generous to suggest that solution to the others, for Jack's sake," Dad suggested, "when we see them. It is warm enough that it would be much more comfortable on the grass than in the barn."
"If," Maria mumbled through a mouthful of cheeseburger. She paused to swallow. "There's no telling why this is happening. There's no telling when it'll stop. It could be done, for all we know."
Suddenly, the station wagon ahead of us was replaced by a sports car. The driver swerved, narrowly missing a car in the other lane. Dad hit the brakes, slowing to get more distance between us. The person behind us honked.
"Or not," Diane muttered.
"I wish things would return to fading in and out," Rachel said. "The suddenness is too much. That was a near miss. I hope the station wagon was as lucky."
Chris nodded. "It's happening everywhere. Did you know our presidents got switched?"
What?! Tobias and I both cried.
Rachel smirked a little. "They're trying to keep it quiet, but the Chee that got here like we did have pretty cool equipment with them. We listened to a phone call between Secret Service people. Seems the Presidents got switched during dinner. I'm especially fond of the quote, 'The President's husband is going nuts'."
Husband? Tobias echoed.
"The president's the same person in both timelines, Tobias," Rachel smirked. "You know what that means."
Tobias chuckled. Okay. I get it. You would love that.
A car passing by us changed from gray to green. The stoplight we went under went from yellow back to green.
"The changes are obviously getting more obvious," Axel said.
"Obviously," Maria echoed. I couldn't see her smirk, but I knew it was there. Perhaps Axel doesn't repeat sounds like Ax does, but he tends to use English strangely.
"That is what I said," Axel replied. Then I vaguely heard him count from six to ten under his breath. When Axel eats in human morph, we've given him a rule: he has to count to ten between the time he swallows and the time he takes his next bite.
"That suggests that the Jacqueline Rip is accelerating," Ax said. "Jacqueline. Jack-klen. Jack-quel-line. Jacqueline's name is a very satisfying combination of sounds."
"Why else would we hang out with her?" Maria asked him. "She's rotten company. We just love saying her name."
I saw Axel glance bitterly at Maria. Maria turned to him and smirked. "Hey, Axelrod, do you like see-food?"
"Not in the car, Maria," Dad said. "Please."
"You do not have seafood," Axel reminded Maria. "You have dead cow."
"Thanks for reminding me," Diane groaned. "Axel, have the rest of mine, please. Go ahead."
"I'll show you what I meant later, Axel," Maria snickered.
Pun warning, Axel, I told him.
"Don't tell him!" Maria told me, turning around to glare at me. "No giving warnings, Tonni. Every Andalite has to learn popular culture by living it, not by being warned about it."
"Focus, people," Chris said. "What would a more noticeable amount of changes mean?"
"It would suggest that the phenomenon is picking up speed," Axel replied.
"Which could mean two things," Dad added. "It is either reaching equilibrium - or heading for utter chaos."
"Wonderful choices," Maria muttered.
"I don't think I like choice two," Diane said. "But what would happen with choice one?"
"That has three possibilities," Dad replied. "Either the phenomenon will reach critical, and die out, returning everything to normal, or it will do the same, dying out, but things will come to rest wherever they come to rest. The universes will separate again while leaving parts of each other within each other."
"What's door one, part three?" Maria asked.
"The third possibility is that the universes will merge. Completely."
"Completely?" Rachel echoed. "You mean, two of everything?"
"The two universes will become one. There will be two of everything, yes, and twice as much space for it."
A ripple passed through the car, and the interior went from black to dull brown. "Okay, good news," Maria said. "This car exists in both universes. Otherwise, we'd be Spam right now."
"Where are we going?" Chris asked.
"Right now, I'm taking you home," Dad replied. "Your barn appears to be the safest place right now. Isolated enough without being completely cut off."
"But sleeping in it is like sleeping... well, like sleeping on hard wood," Diane complained. "It's terrible. And we can't just all stay there. One person hiding out is one thing. Mixed company of, right now, nine people? Don't think so."
"I could get away with Tobias, maybe," Chris said, shaking his head. "But the rest of you? Forget it. No way I could convince my parents to let a bunch of girls sleep over, no offense intended."
"You'd better not intend offense," Maria kidded him, glancing up in the rear-view mirror and shaking her fist at him without turning around.
"Aximili, Aximili, Tobias, and Toniya had best stick to the woods," Dad said. I knew how much that had to hurt to say. Ever since Uncle Ax had joined the Animorphs, Dad has, in his understated way, tried to bridge the gap between them, without much luck. Though Axel and I are close, Axel keeps Dad at a formal arm's length. I'd spoken to Ax about his relationship with Dad - or, at least, Dad's counterpart - and it was very different. Ax had been able to meet Dad: Axel hadn't. Dad had been able to stay on Earth, and I guess Axel can't get over the fact that Dad ran away from the war. He still doesn't understand that, I guess. Just like with Tobias and me, the major difference between Axel and Ax seems to be knowing Dad.
The sky suddenly grew darker. The moon, once just to our left, appeared directly overhead.
"Shift again," Maria said.
"We've crossed over," Chris said, shaking his head.
"Or maybe just the moon did," Diane suggested. "Nothing else seems different."
A sudden thought came to mind. I burst out giggling.
Rachel peered around Ax at me. "What's your problem?" she asked.
I continued giggling for awhile, before I could finally say what I'd thought of. This must be happening everywhere.
"I think everyone present has also figured that out," Maria said from the front seat. "But I think you're the only one who's found that humorous."
I chuckled. I don't mean everywhere on Earth, Maria. I mean, everywhere. We're talking a whole universe - I mean, two whole universes. This is happening to humans, Yeerks-"
"Oh, God," Chris moaned. "I just thought of it. Two Visser Threes?"
Rachel shuddered. "God, I hope not."
That's not what I thought of, I said, though I admit that scared the hell out of me, too. One was definitely worse than enough. What I thought of was that this also has to be happening to Andalites. Obviously, the sex change thing is limited to humans, but... what if it wasn't? I mean, we can all sit here and be buds, but what if this was happening on the homeworld?
No one else seemed to find it funny. I don't think they understood. Of course, the only ones who probably would understand probably didn't find it funny.
"Traditional Andalites are known to be somewhat... bigoted," Dad said slowly. "Here, there is a strong woman's movement. At home, however, we are somewhat... behind."
What do you think it'd be like on the homeworld if what happened with the U.S. Presidents happened with high-ranking military officers? I asked the others. Do you have any thoughts on what would happen?
Rachel smirked a little at that idea. "I think they'd be getting a good shot of reality."
Maria leaned back, putting her hand over the back of the front seat. Rachel slapped it. "Amen, sister," Maria laughed.
I chuckled. The two of them seemed to be getting along well. Much different from how Richard and Maria had gotten along.
I felt a squirming sensation in my wings. Startled, I looked sideways.
Something was happening to Chris's hands.
Chris! I shouted.
"What the-"
Obviously, it wasn't Chris anymore.
Maria glanced in the rear-view mirror again to look in backseat. "Aw, shit," she muttered.
The new person holding me looked up sharply. "What happened?" she asked, startled.
"Maybe Toniya should sit up here," Diane suggested. "I don't think she fits in the backseat crowd anymore."
Rachel leaned forward to look around Ax again. "Fancy meeting you here, Cassie," she said.
Suddenly the car swerved sharply toward oncoming traffic.
"Al, what the-" Diane started to shout.
"Shut up, Dee!" Maria screamed, leaning over and grabbing the wheel. "Al's gone!"
to be continued....