The Animorphs Dementia Cycle - Animorphs with a twist of fate....
We all know Jake, Rachel, Tobias, Cassie, Marco, and Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill. We all know what has happened to them.
But have you ever wondered.... what if....? Yes, "what if". The two words that sparked the creation of fiction, and the foundation of all things of fantasy and science fiction. "What if" is the code of the fan who writes their own version of their favorite stories.
The Dementia Cycle takes "what if" to another level. It gets its name because it looks at Animorphs from another perspective, a different dimension, causing chaos and insanity in its wake. Several slight changes were made in the other universe. Obvious ones. Ones that shouldn't make so much of a difference, but, in fact, do.
The differences can be seen very quickly... if you watch....
Things have come full circle. First, Jacqueline appeared at Jake's bedroom door, claiming his bedroom as her own. Then the Animorphs managed to seal the Jacqueline Rip between their universes, at the cost of Tobias and Maria spending a month in the wrong dimensions. Now, something has happened: unbeknownst to any of them, David has died, which has re-opened their temporary fix. Now, they must seal it for good.
...but is it really up to them?
I hope you enjoy The Dementia Cycle.
Animorphs Dementia #7 - The Conclusion
Long before....
I saw her. I knew that, with my huge wings, I had way more advantage in the cool air, but I also had an idea of how stubborn Jack was. I kept flying. It was a pretty strange race: a little Killjoy's falcon chasing a huge golden eagle through the evening air.
I had no real plan. Just fly. I just had to keep flying.
You've been a long time in that morph, Jack, I called to her, but I knew it was useless. Better demorph.
Not as long as you've been in your morph, Diane.
I guess you're right. I was looking for the right place to do this. But I guess I'll have to take whatever comes up. I started my decent. A moment later, she followed. I fluttered to a landing in some air conditioning equipment. Jack turned a quick circle over the roof, as if looking for something, then glided to a landing a good distance away from me.
I began to demorph. A few moments later, Jack did, too. I began to remorph. So did Jack.
"All right, Di," she said. "You want this fight? You can have this fight."
The muscles packed onto my body as red-orange and black fur grew all over her. The mane bushed out from my short hair as her tail grew. She fell on all fours as my ears traveled up the sides of my face and my nose grew huge. My tail sprouted behind me as her feet grew to full size. I felt the lion's instincts coming, but I shoved them down. I didn't need them. I had plenty of anger. That was enough for me.
She was out for revenge. So was I. This would be a good fight.
It was obvious that Jack wasn't restraining herself so much. She sniffed the air. I crawled out of the pile, standing still, waiting for her to face me.
I was fifty feet away when her crystalline-green eyes looked into mine. The breeze ran through my thick mane. I swished my tail disdainfully. You never answered me, Jack, I sneered. Lion verses tigress. Who do you think will win?
Let's find out, she replied.
She hadn't even finished retorting before I was sprinting right for her, my belly to the ground, staying low. I bared my teeth, prepared for her throat in my jaws. But she crouched down to my level, taking my speed. My teeth scraped her ear, which was where her throat had been. She twisted, going for my throat, just as I'd gone for hers, but that move was no good - unlike her, my throat wasn't bare. I had a nice, thick mane to protect my arteries. Aaaarrrggghhh! she yelled, as I chomped down on her shoulder. She twisted, but it only made the wound worse. Fool! She rolled on her back, exposing her belly. I let go, darting in for the kill, but she was too quick. She pulled her back legs in and kicked.
I never saw what hit me - instead, I was looking behind me as my head snapped back. My nose! Shredded. I couldn't smell a thing but my own blood.
She leaped to her feet, fast as only a cat is fast, but she didn't have any advantage there. The moment she was on her feet again I slammed a huge paw against the side of her skull with enough power to snap a human in two. She leaped blindly, barely avoiding my teeth.
Suddenly we were circling, just circling, our heads next to each other, tails spasming, just waiting for the other to move first, to expose their throat, to die.
My main advantage was my mane. She had to get around that for my throat. We were about equal on speed. She had size and weight over me.
We stared, eye to eye, electricity crackling. This was like no fight I had ever fought before. This was power. This, truly, was power.
When I couldn't stand the power anymore, I charged. We hit shoulder-to shoulder, and rolled. Suddenly, I realized where we were, and jumped clear.
She leaped to her feet immediately, but she didn't find it easy. I was on gravel, but I'd gotten her on the skylight. Her claws screeched against the glass. She looked down. In that moment she put her guard down, I leaped. She couldn't move: walking on the glass was as good - as useless - as walking on ice. She was trapped. The look on her face told me she knew it. I struck her, my teeth almost reaching their target, when she jerked aside, just a little. Once again I slammed into her, but this time, the ground - the glass - gave out. With an earsplitting shatter, it splintered and broke from our combined weights, plunging us into the mall.
The next few moments were a blur of snarls and swipes, lunges and roars, as we raced to finish each other off before we hit the ground.
Then my teeth struck home.
It was frighteningly satisfying, as my teeth plunged into her neck. As I felt the throb of her pulse travel up my teeth and into my jaw.
Just before we hit, I twisted, pulling my teeth from her neck, and landed on top of her.
That didn't stop my legs from snapping like twigs. No, there was an enormous crack as several of her ribs and three of my legs crumpled. I roared painfully as I rolled off of her, unable to stand. I began to demorph immediately.
Human once more, I stared.
It was huge. Seven feet long, thirteen including that sinewy, ringed tail, over three hundred pounds of dying liquid metal. I felt nauseous, suddenly, staring at the blood-orange creature bleeding to death.
Had I done that?
Me, Diane, really done that?
I shuddered, shivered, and ran. I ran up a flight of stairs, down a concourse. I don't know why I ran, really; I just couldn't face that thing, that huge monster, that...
... that human I had killed.
No! Tigress. It was an animal! Animal! It wasn't human! It wasn't murder! You can't murder animals!
I forced myself to stop, to think. I was outside a jewelry store. I looked in: it was some sort of display about not wasting time with other stores. A bunch of crummy, wind-up alarm clocks were displayed around some tacky-looking jewelry. Sometimes I can't believe what people get paid for these days.
I looked up sharply as I heard a faint whoosh overhead, just in time to see two shadows - one silent, the other gray. An owl, and a hawk.
The cavalry.
"Damn it," I muttered. Now I'd have to deal with more of them. I looked at the window, and smiled vaguely to myself. I hurried to squeeze myself against the grid blocking off the store entrance, where it'd be hard to see me from where Jack was. Without question, they'd go to her first.
The owl turned into Rich, the hawk the alien. Rich muttered something, and the alien went for the staircase. I grit my teeth, drew back my fist, and slammed it through the glass, grabbing one of the stupid alarm clocks. I grabbed it, wound it with my other hand, and dropped it back in the window. Then I bolted for the escalator.
Fur and muscle, claws and mane, tail and power... it was becoming second nature... within moments I was zooming low on the floor. At the last moment, Rich turned, saw me, and snapped one hand out to grab a railing Jack had broken. He threw himself outward, crashing back into the concourse as I shot past. It took a moment to get my footing on the smooth granite and stop, but in a moment, I returned, looking down at him.
He'd been so tough. So cruel. He hadn't even had a sympathetic expression, not even once. Not one word of compassion. It would be so easy to hate him... Now I looked down at him as he swung back and forth on the broken railing. Alarm clock, I told him. That's what the Andalite is chasing. I set it. He didn't answer. I resisted the urge to bare my teeth. All I have to do is bite your fingers, Richard. Aren't you going to beg for mercy? I sneered. All I had to do was hate him. It was as simple as that. Hate. Revenge. That was all I needed now. It was his fault. His fault. Remember, Diane, it was him. Nah, of course not. You're brave Richard. Richard the Lion-Hearted, meet Diane the Lion. I opened my mouth, turning it for the best possible angle... and he let go.
He let go!
I stared, shocked, as he fell. He twisted in midair, snagging a crossbeam with the hand he'd snagged the railing with before. He grunted in pain as he reached up with the other hand, and boosted himself onto the narrow beam. He knelt on it for a moment, then stood, facing me.
I stared at him, disbelieving. How had he done that?
He stared right back.
The eyes. Too intelligent. No! They looked at me.
I couldn't kill when they were looking at me! No! Those eyes!
Halfheartedly, I reached through the bars, but I already knew he was out of reach. I just wanted to warn him, make him worry. He teetered, but remained on the bar. That's okay, I told him coldly. I'm not a murderer, you know. I wouldn't kill a human. I would have smiled if I could have. If I made him squirm enough, maybe he'd lose his balance and kill himself. Now, a bird... a tigress... sure.
He stared at me with bloodthirsty eyes. "Find a place to hide," he snarled, his voice so similar to my own, in the form I had at the moment. "Because I'll make you a promise: I will kill you, Diane."
I laughed at him. Him, kill me? Hardly.
It was going to be the other way around.
I laughed as I walked away, leaving him on his stupid little beam.
He lost it before I had gone ten feet.
"I'll kill you!" he howled. "I'll kill you! I'll kill you!"
Inwardly, I was happy to hear that.
It's so much easier to kill people who want to kill you.
What next? I asked myself, as I demorphed in another part of the mall.
I'd dealt with Toniya and Jack. I had Rich out for my blood. The alien was here. Who was left?
Chris, and Maria.
I smiled grimly, and began morphing again. Once I was light enough to use them, I spread my long wings and took to the air. It didn't take too long before I was fluttering my wings against a window. Hurry! I shouted at the person inside. Maria, open up! It's me! Oh, God, hurry up!
Maria rubbed her eyes grumpily as she came over and threw open the window. "What do you want?" she muttered.
Hang on, let me demorph, I told her, landing on her window sill. I jumped down to the floor. I need to catch my breath. So easy. Right next to me was a baseball bat. Oh please! This was just too easy! I began to grow, forcing my weight forward so that, when I was human again, I was on my hands and knees, one of my hands on the bat.
What's so urgent? Maria demanded, changing over to thought-speak so her parents didn't overhear us. Good old Maria.
Your headache, I replied, getting both hands on the bat.
Huh?
Sweet dreams. I swung the bat in an upward arc, literally bunting Maria's forehead with it. She fell to the floor with a muffled thump. Quickly, I grabbed her wrist, felt the tingle of her DNA enter my veins, then dragged her to the closet. She might have an attitude, but she wasn't Rich. I couldn't consider outright killing her, not while she was human. She came to as I bound her wrists with one of her own belts, and slammed the door in her face. I morphed once more. I climbed into her bed, falling asleep almost immediately and completely by accident. Morphing repeatedly takes a lot out of you.
Maria! Maria! Wake up! Wake up, now!
I jerked awake. Where was I? I rolled halfway over, kicking the blankets of the unfamiliar bed off of me.
Wake up! the same voice yelled.
I sat up, looked around. Where-? Maria's room, I realized. I'd fallen asleep. I rubbed my face, looked at the clock. Only half an hour, I was okay.
Maria, it's me, Rich. I'm outside. Are you alone in your room?
I was careful to keep my expression neutral. What a moron! I nodded, yes, I was alone. Alone with an idiot knocked out in the closet. I got out of the bed, picking up the baseball bat again. I held it behind me as I approached the window.
Swoooosh! Obviously, it wasn't Rich, with his owl morph. Instead, a gray hawk got a beakful of pine as I knocked it straight out the window again. Most of its beak landed inside the room, while the bird was definitely knocked outside. I chuckled softly. Down one alien.
The surprise was gone. I morphed out. Then I morphed again, back to eagle. It was time to finish what I'd started.
Rich was going down.
Rich turned tail. I would have scowled if I could - the Andalite was morphing out. No matter. He was small beans. I'd taken out Jack. If I could take Jack, I could take any of them.
Follow me, Diane, Rich sneered. We'll see who rules the sky.
Brave words, I sneered right back. But you're mine, just as that Bird-bitch of yours was mine.
There was a long pause before Rich said anything. I barely heard him.
For you, Tonni, he whispered.
Inwardly, I smiled. This would be a fair fight, now.
Revenge against revenge.
We flew through the cool air. Rich had no chance: my wings were gigantic compared to his. He put me through quite a drill, but I never lost him. Never quite caught up, but never lost sight of him.
You're very good, Richard, I told him. You know, I wish I didn't have to do this. That wasn't true. I wished I did. I was having a hard time convincing myself I did. I tried not to think about it. I had to keep him talking, had to keep myself focused.
Yeah, but you just can't help yourself, he sneered.
You all left me no choice! I snapped. You forced me. What was I supposed to do? Let Jack order me around, let her get me killed? Spend the rest of my life hiding?
Do you expect me to pity you?
I lost my family. Everything! All thanks to all of you!
What are you, nuts? We're not your problem - at least we weren't, until you messed with us.
We left the trees and houses he'd used as cover behind, as we flew over an open field. I poured on the speed. He dodged, but I'd expected it.
Up ahead, I saw his target - high power lines. He was going to fry me?
Golden eagle fricassee?
No mercy?
Well, then, Richard... no mercy.
He had no chance. He'd lost his luck. I snatched him out of thin air. Aaaahhh! he screamed as I dug my talons into his back. Noooooo! he howled. He beat his wings, but it was useless: he was mine. I squeezed, harder and harder, carrying him higher. Now, if he tried demorphing, I'd drop him on the high power lines. It would be his fault if he met the same fate as he had planned for me.
Sorry, Rich, I told him. But, after all, birds die all the time, don't they?
That's when it happened. I never saw it coming.
One moment, Rich was almost mine.
Then, something slammed into the back of my head, shaving off most of my feathers. I screamed.
Rich, is it me, or is Di getting to be a real pain in the ass?
I let go - I had to. That voice, it - no! It had to be Maria - she was the only one left. I'd gotten Jack and Toniya. It had to be Maria - she had to have gotten loose. The alien! He had to be here, too! He must have let her free. Rich flapped his wings, a little awkwardly, but he flew. He could still retaliate. Three against one. With a scream of frustration, I flew away.
That was a lifetime ago. Several lifetimes ago. That was someone else. I don't know who, but that isn't me. I can hardly believe it ever was.
Sure, I still live with a fear everyday. But it isn't the same fear anymore. Now, I'm not afraid that I won't get revenge on every jackass who's ruined my life. I've kind of realized that, eventually, that'd either get me killed, or have me kill every single person on the planet. I wasn't up to that.
Cassie told me a bit of David, my counterpart. How he was able to morph Jake and Rachel's cousin Saddler.
I hadn't. I'd reached for Sandra... but then I'd pulled away. I just couldn't do it. For some reason, I had this horrible picture of myself, of being in that bed, trapped. Doomed. Dying.
For a moment, a split second, I felt myself dying.
I had run. Instead of sealing my doom as a rat, I'd run straight to the Yeerk pool, against Rich's warning of what would happen to my family.
They'd come after me, the morons. Dragged me out just as a Yeerk got in me. Jack - damn Jack! - dragged me out with her teeth. She took me deep into the woods, broke both my legs, and sat. For three straight days, she sat, watching me. Not moving. The Yeerk and I alternated being awake, but she stayed there, awake, the entire time. Even as my feet turned gangrene, she didn't let me morph. She put it quite simply: "You morph, I break your neck. Your choice."
The Yeerk in me was an idiot. By the third day, Jack couldn't walk, she was so exhausted and hungry. But so was I. Plus, the infection had spread through my body. I was dying, and it became a war of wills: Jack's over the Yeerks. I was just a bystander dying on the sidelines.
At long last, the Yeerk died. Jack let me morph. I survived. We half-dragged each other back to civilization.
I can never forgive her for that.
And I can never thank her enough.
CHAPTER 41
Diane
I shook her until her head rattled. "Don't you get it?" I screamed at her. "The Rip is open again!"
Rachel grabbed my wrist, whipping me back. For an insane moment, I made a fist. I was going to smash her teeth in. Nobody treated me like that!
But I got a grip on myself. This wasn't the time. Rachel wasn't an enemy. Save the anger for the enemy. That's how I got by now - save the anger for the enemy.
Deal with life calmly.
Save the anger for the war.
Maria stared at me, half because she still wasn't quite willing to accept that I was there, half because she was probably trying to get the room to hold still. "I get it," she said.
"It's about time," I snapped. Then I flopped on the bed next to her. "So what're we going to do about it, then?"
"The others have to know about this," Maria said. "We have to get them."
I rolled my eyes. "Nothing gets done when we conference," I told them flatly. "Between the three of us, we should be able to figure out what to do."
"That's not how we work," Rachel said coldly.
Maria sighed. "Rachel, I know it's bad for cover, but could you call the others outside? I need to talk with Diane a moment."
Rachel frowned a little. "Kicked out of my own room by Marco," she muttered. "That's the day." She shook her head, but left.
I turned to look at Maria. She had an odd half smile on her face. "What's your problem?" I demanded.
She chuckled softly. "I'm too relieved, I guess," she replied. "Rachel's actually got a sense of humor in there and I have another familiar face." She looked at me seriously. "I am going to hug you."
"Maybe later," I told her. "What do you want to talk about?"
"I lied. I wanted to hug you." Before I could get away she hugged me. She made it quick, though. "Now, tell me everything. What's been going on there?"
"Probably the exact same thing as here," I replied curtly. Who cared? "Seia Fel got stuck in the newest - and now deceased - Yeerk base and I nearly got killed saving her ass. She said that, though there's been no change in the valley, Fel Teval and Tari Ari disappeared, along with some others, while on a raid run."
"Those two are here," she told me. "We just rescued them from what was probably the same base." She sighed. "Oh, Diane, I can't tell you how relieved I am to know they're all right."
"Who?"
"Tobias, Toniya. Oh, God, I was sure I'd killed them." She drew up her knees, hugging them, and shuddered. "I was so, so sure I had killed them. That they were dead. I had Rachel hating me here, and I was sure Al hated me, and everybody hated me. I knew Marc-" She sobbed, resting her forehead on her knees. "Oh, God, Diane, I am so, so sick."
"Sick?" I echoed, not understanding. "You're not going to puke, are you?"
She chuckled weakly, shaking her head. "I am a perverted, twisted, disgusting..."
"Would you stop listing what you are and tell me why, or should I just leave you to feel sorry for yourself?" I demanded.
She looked at me, tears streaming down her face. "Shut up," she snapped. "You just shut up. You have no idea what it's been like. You have no idea what it's like to totally lose everything and have to start over."
"I don't, don't I?" I demanded sharply. "Oh, getting kidnapped by you guys doesn't qualify? Having my parents get taken by those filthy slugs doesn't count? Having my house demolished by your stupid fight and having to live with that damn alien doesn't make me lose everything? What didn't I lose, huh? I have no idea?" I snarled. "Remember who you're talking to!"
She swallowed heavily, blinking. She let go of her knees and sighed. "I'm sorry, Diane," she said softly.
"You should be," I snapped.
"I forgot, okay? I'm upset."
"No, it's not okay! It's not okay that my mom and dad are-" I cut myself off before I said too much. There was no telling how many of those bastards might be in the house. "It is not okay," I hissed, clenching my fists. "It was never okay."
"Marco kissed me."
"So what."
"Diane," she snapped, glaring at me. "My counterpart kissed me."
"So?"
"Oh, forget it!" she yelled, throwing up her hands. "I should've known it'd be over your head. Your counterpart's a rat and so are you."
I grit my teeth, biting back an answer. I was not going to get into another fight. Bad enough that was about all I was doing with Jack now. I wasn't going to start it again. I wasn't going to waste my time.
Rachel returned, then looked at each of us. "Don't get too cozy," she remarked. "We have a barn to get to."
I shoved passed her, trying to get as far away from Maria as I could before I did something I'd regret.
"Go to hell," I muttered.
CHAPTER 42
Jake
"So," Diane finished, "Tobias is happily living with his 'sister' and his dad. No problems beyond the usual near-death experiences. We're all alive. Now if we can just figure out why the hell I'm here, maybe I can go back to living in the woods in an empty scoop."
Marco snickered, but it was forced. Something was wrong with him and Maria. They were as far away from each other as they could get without being dead obvious, and hadn't shared a joke the entire time. They'd arrived separately, and hadn't said a single word to each other. "You had to live with Ax?"
"Axel," she corrected him. "And it was either that or rot in this - the other - the barn. At least the woods don't smell as bad, and the scoop gets cable." She crossed her arms, scowling. "So, Rachel and Maria insisted on dragging the rest of you in here. What now? Anybody have any bright ideas?"
"The Jacqueline Rip is open again," Cassie said, "or at least unplugged. "But why?"
"Maybe something ate my counterpart," Diane snapped. "Who cares why? We need to figure out how, as in, how to destroy it. To hell with plugging it up. We have to get rid of that thing entirely."
"As far as we know, that Rip has been there since before we were born," I disagreed. "Maybe from the beginning of time, who knows? The problem isn't destroying it. We have to get it back to normal. Back to however big it was, when its effects were limited to... well, whatever they were before."
"How do you know it even existed before?" Diane demanded.
"How do you know it didn't?" I replied calmly. She scowled, but didn't give me a reason, so I didn't give her one, either. That was good, because I didn't have one. It was just a hunch. An extremely powerful hunch, but a hunch without any proof. "But I agree. We have to find a way to return our realities to normal."
Marco rolled his eyes. He held one hand in the air, palm down, then wrapped his fingers around an imaginary telephone receiver. He stabbed the air under it with his finger, then held the "receiver" to his ear. "Hello, Ellimist?" he said. "Yeah, this is your old buddy, Marco. Yeah, Marco, the one who saved your Iskoort. Yeah, uh huh, same Marco. Yeah! I'm fine. Listen, we're having reality problems here. Could you come and help patch them up? Okay, thanks, you're swell."
"Why thank you, Marco."
It would have been kind of funny to see all six of turn at once.
"As Chris's mother is not here at the moment, I have assumed her form for the moment," a woman who looked eerily like Cassie's dad said. "To tell the truth, friends, your maneuver to 'plug' the rip between universes backfired. In truth, it is not Maria and Diane who are in the wrong dimension. It is the rest of you."
I looked at Rachel, who was next to me. She looked back, equally confused. "How can that be?" she asked the creature who wasn't Chris's mother. "That's ridiculous. I mean, everything's normal. There's squirrels, and wolves, and... how could most of one universe get stuck in the other?"
"She" shrugged a little, smiling faintly. "It was simply a matter of timing," "she" replied. "Your calculations weren't so far off. You simply didn't realize that you were doing things backwards."
"Backwards?" Maria echoed.
The Ellimist - who else could it be? - nodded slightly. "It is not a matter of separating the universes," it said. "It is a matter of bringing them together. You cannot destroy the Jacqueline Rip. You must create it."
"But it's already there," Diane sneered. "Aren't we a little late to create it?"
"To seal the Rip," the creature said coldly, "you cannot separate the universes. You can only bring them together." "She" smiled a little. "My friends, this was never a matter of separation. This is a union - a union which you shall never see, never feel, but one that exists - and must exist." "She" regarded me. "How do you imagine time, Jake?"
I frowned a little. "It's..."
"It's like a tree," she answered for me, "which splits into two when there is a choice: should something happen, should it not happen. But sometimes, Jake, it is not so simple. Sometimes, it is necessary that something happen, and not happen. And you know where to find that something... don't you, Jake."
One moment, she was there, the next, she wasn't.
"What the hell did she just babble?" Diane demanded.
Everyone was looking at me. I took a deep breath, trying to think of how to word this.
Yes, I knew. I had sort of known all along, but could never consider it. It was too dangerous, too inclined not to work. But if the Ellimist said it was necessary... well, we were kind of out of options.
"We have to go back into the Rip," I said.
CHAPTER 43
Tobias
"We have to go back into the Rip."
We stared at Jack, not really knowing what to say.
Chris had the best position to stare at her, what with his arm around her waist. They were a far cry from Jake and Cassie, who generally tried to pretend there was nothing serious between them. The two of them were inseparable.
Toniya and I perched together in the rafters. We'd been kind of hard to separate, too, but in a totally different way. When I was with Toniya, it was like having the sister I'd never had. It had always hurt, being shuttled from place to place, being always alone. Though I'd usually imagined having a brother, not a sister, Toniya was better than any imaginary sibling. None of the brothers I had imagined would have understood being a nothlit anywhere near as much as Toniya did.
Below us, Elfangor frowned, but didn't comment.
Being trapped in this universe was the best thing that had ever happened to me.
Here, for the first time, I had a family. Not like the Animorphs back home, who I considered my family, but a real family. Though I could never call him it - it just didn't seem right - Elfangor was a great father. Understanding but stern, easy-going but not a pushover. It had been strange, the first time I'd gone hunting with Toniya, and Elfangor went along. But, after we'd each caught something, Elfangor put each kill in this sort of pouch that kept it in the same, just-killed condition the entire way back to the house. It was the weirdest family dinner ever - Toniya pulling apart two rats, me a rabbit, and Elfangor calmly eating pot roast and potatoes. Strange or not, though, it was a family dinner. We talked in thought-speak as we ate. That's the nice thing about thought-speak - it isn't impolite to use it while eating. The family dinner thing was a once a week type thing, but I loved it. I got to know Elfangor, and he got to know me. It was a dream come true.
But now that the dream had come true, I wanted to go home.
It had struck me hard, the first time I realized I was homesick. I wondered what was wrong with me. I finally had a family! A real family! A father, a sister, who understood me, loved me! Wanted me!
But I missed my old field, which was just a patch of trees here. I missed Ax... though I knew he wouldn't be there, back home, I still missed him. I missed Jake, Marco, and Cassie.
But mostly, I missed Rachel.
Standing a little apart, as he always did, Rich frowned. We got along okay, I guess. He definitely wasn't Rachel. Actually, he was more like Jake. "Then what?"
Jack shook her head. "I don't know," she replied honestly. "Ever since we went through, I've had the nagging thought that, if we went through again, things might improve. But I didn't know. It was too dangerous. Things were going okay, right? Who here would take back the last month of their lives, huh? Chris? Rich? Tobias? Would any of you like to erase the last month of your lives?"
No, I replied. But I'm ready to go home.
Toniya looked at me. You... She trailed off. As always, she understood, but she didn't always understand right away. She narrowed her eyes and cocked her head to the side, but she didn't fool me. She wasn't smiling at all.
I'll miss you, too, I told her.
You'd better, she replied.
Promise.
*
It didn't take long to get back to where we'd started from. Back to the field in the middle of nowhere.
It felt strange, going on a mission without Diane. But no one could find her. Toniya and I had combed the woods for her, but she was nowhere to be found. We just had to hope that we could do this without her, whatever "this" was.
"Why do I get this feeling that your 'Ellimist' guy is pulling our strings just like our all-powerful pain-in-the-butt did?" Rich asked me.
I would have shrugged, but hawks don't shrug. I don't know. Do you have ESP or something?
He laughed. "I doubt it, but let's check. Think of a number between two and four. Is it three?"
Actually, I was thinking of pi.
"Cheater." He clapped his hands together. "So let's do this! We don't have all day. My dad'll have my hide if I don't call him in about an hour."
Rich was actually okay, considering what he had to put up with now. Not only was he trying to be an Animorph again, but his dad enforced strict rules. If he went out, he had to call home every three hours. His curfew was at six at night, except with permission, which was hard to get. He was going to a psychiatrist four times a week. In spite of all that, he was able to smile and laugh. But still, he never quite seemed relaxed, or happy. He now had that something about him that Jake and Jack did, that feeling that he hid several decades of experience and wisdom and pain under a teenaged face.
"There's no telling how it's going to be in there," Jack said. "I suggest lifechain again." Rich nodded.
One of the odd things I'd noticed was the about-face Jack did after we'd returned from the Jacqueline Rip the first time. Instead of being the don't-mess-with-me, my-way-or-the-highway leader she'd looked like when we were switching universes. She was much more democratic. Instead of saying, "There's no telling how it's going to be in there, make a lifechain," she suggested that it be what they did. I think it had something to do with Rich coming back. Maybe it was what they used to do, sort of co-lead. Or maybe it was how she chose to deal with the fact that she now had to keep Rich and Diane, both extremely stubborn people, working with the team. Diane was no less of a pain in the ass than David had been, but she was smart. What she didn't have in personality she made up for in getting straight to the root of problems. Unfortunately, she had a tendency of creating more problems along the way.
The others waited for Toniya and I to morph to human before we made the chain. There would be no repeat mistakes. Rich insisted on going first. Jack was right next to him, and Chris next to her. Both Elfangor and Toniya seemed to want to keep me on, but one thing was clear: if it was the hellhole it had been before, I had to be on an end, so I could let go without taking anyone with me. It was kind of funny, though: they turned their backs to the others and did rock, paper, scissors. Elfangor did paper. Toniya did scissors. We took our places.
Toniya squeezed my wrist. "I won't be letting go willingly," she told me with a faint smile.
"I won't be letting go unless I have to," I replied.
She let go of my wrist for a moment to hug me around the shoulders. I hugged her back. "I will never forget you, Tobias."
"I will never forget any of this." Neither of us like being held much, anymore. The hug was quick. We gripped each other's wrists again.
"Everybody set?" Jack asked us. Everyone nodded: nobody said anything out loud, except Rich.
"Let's do it," he said, true to form.
He reached out, to where the hole in reality had been. For a moment, nothing happened, but then he felt around, and his hand disappeared. "I don't feel anything," he told us. "No pull. Here goes everything."
One by one, we stepped into nothingness. When it was my turn, I held my breath. I don't know why: it just seemed right.
One moment, it looked as if I was going to walk across a field, but then the field disappeared, to be replaced by dark, greenish-purple fog. Existence just seemed to... stop. There was no wind, no tunnels, nothing. Just emptiness, and the six of us.
"This isn't where we were last time," Toniya pointed out, letting go of me and Elfangor. She frowned slightly. "What is this place? It's almost like that place Enienek would take us when she pulled us from existence."
"Who?" I asked. I was looking around, too.
She said something, but I didn't hear her.
Through the fog, I saw something move. Something with four legs.
"Who's there!" I shouted. The others looked at me oddly.
Tobias?
My mouth fell open. "Ax?"
The thing came quickly towards us, followed by an identical form. Suddenly, they burst through the fog, identical except that one was slightly larger and slightly darker than the other.
"Axel!" Jack cried, grinning. "Damn you, four eyes, where have you been!"
Awaiting your arrival patiently, Princess Jack, the darker one replied dryly. He bowed his upper body gracefully, his stalk eyes bobbing. It is good to see you again. He looked at us. Where is Diane? Maria? Why is Tobias with you?
"It's a long story," I replied. "Great to see you again, Ax-man."
I am pleased to see you as well, Tobias, Ax replied. Same old Ax. I liked my universe's Ax better. No offense to Axel or anything, but his sense of humor really needed work.
"So what now?" Rich asked nobody in particular. "We just stand and rot in here? Where is here, anyway? This isn't the Jacqueline Rip."
ALL WILL BE EXPLAINED.
"Oh, boy," Rich said, rolling his eyes. "Not the big voice again."
"That... that's not the Ellimist," I said. The voice was different. It had a definite feminine quality, with an odd, sort of feline quality thrown in, too. Not at all like the Ellimist's voice.
"Of course it's not," Toniya replied. "We're not in your universe anymore. That's The Enienek." I looked at her oddly. "We don't have an Ellimist. We have an Enienek."
"Oh."
"Tobias! Tobias?"
My head jerked left. "Rachel?"
More forms were coming through the fog. Human forms. Three sort of short, two sort of tall, one in the middle. As they stepped through the fog, we could see that two were blond girls, one a black girl, one a brown-haired boy, two a boy and a girl who looked eerily alike.
ALL IS AS IT MUST BE. THE STAGE IS SET.
"That'd be the Ellimist again," I said. Toniya nodded.
SAY GOODBYE NOW, FRIENDS, Enienek told us. YOU WILL NOT GET THE CHANCE AGAIN.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Marco demanded. Maria frowned a little.
YOU HAVE DONE WELL, the Ellimist said. NOW, WE WILL FINISH WHAT YOU HAVE STARTED.
"So this is over?" Diane asked.
It had better be! A new form leaped through the fog. It was much smaller than any of us, a rodent with a long tail. I got eaten! Eaten!
Jake, Maria, Marco, Cassie, and Rachel all looked at Diane. She frowned a little. "I didn't know," she told them defensively. I wondered what she meant.
CHAPTER 44
The groups collectively said goodbye to each other, then, in unspoken agreement, separated by counterparts.
Jake and Jack faced each other. Small, sad smiles appeared on their faces at the same time. As if they'd done it many times before, the two of them reached out with their right hands and shook. "Good luck," Jake said.
Jack nodded slightly, then reached behind him with her left hand and gave him a slight hug. "You, too," she said, then let go.
*
Rich and Rachel shared equal glares. The only reason Rachel didn't have her arms crossed was that Rich had beaten her to it. "Can't say I'll miss you," she muttered.
"Me neither," he replied. Suddenly he rolled his eyes and sighed. "Look. I'm you. I'm not a coward."
"Keep telling yourself that."
"It's not enough that I'm giving this another shot, is it?" She didn't bother answering. "Do you want me to apologize? I'm not going to. I did what I felt was right, so I can't say I'm sorry for it. I am sorry for putter people in danger for what I've done, but I'm not sorry for doing it. I didn't mean for people to get hurt. I did what I had to. You understand that. If you don't, no one does."
She glared at him. They both knew he was right, but they also knew she would never admit it. He held out his hand. "Goodbye, Rachel."
She would never admit he was right - aloud. Her handshake admitted enough. "Goodbye, Richard."
*
The two Aximilis sort of stared at each other for awhile.
We won, Axel said.
Yes, Ax agreed.
Axel looked around at the others. It seems human say goodbye in this manner. He held out his right hand.
Yes. I have seen this. Ax shook his hand.
Of course, goodbye isn't really an appropriate thing to say.
No, it is not. I would not consider saying goodbye to myself - it would seem suicidal.
Axel looked at him for a moment. Was... that a joke, Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill?
Ax waved his stalk eyes in a manner equivalent to a shrug. An attempt.
Keep up the good work. It was a pleasure to meet you.
And you as well. Farewell.
And you.
*
Cassie and Chris shared smiles, then gave each other a hug.
"Don't let him get away, Cass," he teased her. He smiled at her blush. "Take it from one who knows. You're the one who has to take the initiative."
"I know," she replied ruefully. "Jack told me."
He chuckled, and hugged her again. "It's worth it," he assured her. "Embarrassing, stressful, often downright depressing... but worth all the tea in China."
Cassie laughed. "Your mom says that too?"
He shook his head, smiling. "Nah. My dad's the one full of wise sayings."
"Oh, yeah. Forgot."
"I don't blame you." He kissed her on her forehead. "Take care of yourself, and everyone else," he told her. "I'll cover my end."
"Deal," she agreed, and they parted ways.
*
Toniya and Tobias, their faces equally blank, stood facing each other.
"I'll miss you," Tonni said. Tobias nodded. He stepped forward to say goodbye, but Tonni shook her head. "No, not yet," she said, taking a step backwards. She turned around, away from him. "Dad?"
Elfangor stepped forward, standing beside Toniya. He smiled his sad smile at Tobias. "It was a great honor to meet you, Tobias," he said, his voice soft yet strong, proud, yet sad. "I will never forget you. Toniya has never disappointed me, and neither did you. It would have been the greatest of honors to call you my son."
Tobias didn't smile. His face didn't twitch, didn't respond.
His voice did.
"Thank you, Elfangor," he said, his voice equally soft and strong, proud and sad. He stepped forward, and allowed Elfangor to hold him close, firmly, but not crushing.
Tonni came forward, to embrace them both.
Here, too, goodbye went unsaid.
*
Nothing was said for a long time.
"Say something," Marco finally asked her, but he didn't look up.
Neither did she. "Too late. You did."
They looked up at the same time. "Look-" They stopped. "You first. No- fine, I'll-"
"Stop it!" Maria cried, then started giggling.
Marco smiled. "I don't want to say goodbye," he said softly.
"Then don't." Maria tried to smile, but failed. She stepped toward him, kissing him gently on the cheek, pulling away.
"Maybe it'll be like this never happened," he suggested.
"I hope not!" She put her hand against his cheek. "Marco, if I'd never met you, I would hate myself."
"That's ridiculous."
"No, it's not, and you know it. You hated yourself. You hated all the times you failed your mom. You hated that you could see the clear, bright, ruthless line better than anyone else. You hated that, underneath your short, cute exterior was the most terrible monster you have ever witnessed - a thousand times worse than anything Visser Three could morph. I know, Marco," she insisted, before he could deny it, "because I did, too. I hated all that in me. But then I met you... and I realized that neither of us are evil." She hugged him. Stiffly at first, then more naturally, he returned her embrace. "Thank you, Marco."
"Thank you," he echoed. Then he pulled away. "Do we really have to say goodbye? I mean-"
She grinned. "I don't think that's really necessary." Her smile faded. "Marco, someday, Visser One is going to die. That day, your mom... my dad... they're going to smile. And when they do, we'll be together again."
Marco thought about it for a moment, then kissed her on the cheek. He grinned, but the expression only brushed his eyes, not taking hold. "See you later, then," he said.
*
"Jerk," Diane muttered.
Witch, David sneered in reply.
"Moron."
Idiot.
"Bastard!"
Bitch!
Theirs was the easiest parting.
CHAPTER 45
Enienek
Farewells being said - not goodbyes, because only one pair had chosen to pretend they were parting - the two groups came back together, then separated again. I myself remained beside Ellimist.
It was good to see you again, I told him in our own, silent "tongue".
Yes, he agreed. Sad that we are spreading so thin.
Some branches are already under Crayak's reign.
I know. There is nothing we can do.
I did our equivalent of nodding. Temporality has been reached, I pointed out.
Ellimist turned his attention to the mortals. So it has, he murmured. He "smiled", just slightly. Would you like the honor, Enienek?
They are of our timelines, I pointed out. We must both separate them as they should be.
True... true.
I turned my attention to the groups of mortals. Unintentionally, they had organized themselves in very similar ways.
Ellimist's Chosen clustered around the one called Jake, who had his left arm around Cassie's waist. Marco stood at his right. Ellimist's Aximili stood just behind Jake, his tail protectively at ready. Tobias and Rachel stood next to that Aximili, their fingers intertwined where none of the other mortals could see. David crouched in front of the group, making his attempts to ignore them obvious.
My own Chosen clustered around Jack. Chris stood at her left, his arm around her waist instead of vice versa. Maria stood close to her right, her "poker face" hiding her pain from all but myself. My own Aximili stood just behind Jack, his tail slightly lazier than Ellimist's Aximili. Toniya stood between my Aximili and Elfangor, one hand at the base of Aximili's human-like back, the other enfolded in one of Elfangor's hands. Diane stood between Elfangor and Rich, and glared at the latter. Rich stood, slightly apart, his arms crossed and expression blank.
All he knew of this moment was his apprehension for what was to come. Only I knew how happy he was, deep inside, that he was finally going home.
It was a happiness shared by many, shown by none.
Mortals are simple, especially the physically-based ones. They have difficulty perceiving the effects of overlapping dimensions, being too engrossed in their own. That is why early crosses between these two were overlooked - they were beyond physical comprehension, and therefore rationalized as "normal". That was why, with these counterparts, some had used morphs they had never acquired, or had abilities they should not have, such as the ability to use thought-speak out of morph for Ellimist's Animorphs, or the fact that Toniya became a nothlit before her four-hour limit was spent. It is only when faced with duplication, not inversion, that physical mortals are able to realize the greater complexity they are normally unaware of.
Ellimist and I overlapped our essences, so that we partially occupied the same space. Now, the mortals would perceive only one of us, not both. It was better that way. On your mark, Enienek, he told me.
ARE YOU PREPARED? I asked the two groups.
Jake looked at Ellimist. Jack looked at me. In their limited capacity, they could only perceive the one of us in tune to their timeline. They could hear us both, but only believed one was there, that only one was speaking. Ellimist's Animorphs only perceived Ellimist, and my Animorphs only perceived Enienek.
"Do it," the two leaders said.
If I were not myself, it would have seemed as if they were one in the same.
Which they were.
And yet they weren't.
Physical mortals cannot hope to understand.
The two groups looked at each other.
Jack and Jake nodded to each other.
Rachel and Rich avoided each other's eyes.
Tobias and Toniya, their emotions hidden behind blank expressions, simply stared at each other.
The Aximilis shared another private farewell.
Cassie and Chris traded silent smiles of encouragement.
Maria and Marco waved to one another with an empty grin.
David and Diane traded one last, spiteful glare, then ignored each other.
At that point, Ellimist and I fully integrated our essences, so that, for the briefest of moments, there was only one of us.
In the same way, the two groups of Animorphs collided, merging, so that there were no longer two, but one.
And so it was over.
CHAPTER 46
Enienek
And yet, it wasn't.
Before even my race, something occurred which caused every choice to occur. Fate is not about something happening, or not happening: it is about choosing to take the path in which it does, or does not.
This time was no different.
In one direction, the direction of Ellimist and myself, the realities separated. His Animorphs returned to where they belonged, and mine returned to their place.
But in another, the mergence did not succeed. Rather, Ellimist and I became merged as our two timelines became one. As the number of Animorphs grew from six or eight to fourteen. As the Yeerks equally doubled, and Andalites as well. As the universe itself doubled.
And yet, only Crayak remained whole, and the number of my people remained at one.
Ellimist and I regarded the youngest of our people.
Ellinek, or Enienist? I asked them rather jokingly.
They would have shrugged noncommittedly, if it was in our nature. I shall decide that some other time. Farewell and good luck.
Farewell and good luck, Ellimist echoed.
Farewell and good luck, I agreed.
My people do not believe in "goodbye".
CHAPTER 47
Jake
It's the day before Finals Week.
I sat at my desk. I sat with my elbows on the desk, my attention focused on my history textbook. The radio was off. The door was closed. My dog, Homer, was on the other side of the door. There were absolutely, positively, NO physical distractions.
I looked dead serious about studying.
Needless to say, I wasn't. I was jumping out of my skin. I stared blankly at the textbook, whose words had blurred together a long time ago; I hadn't read a single sentence, much less turned a page, in at least twenty minutes.
I was waiting.
I waited a long time.
I looked up.
There was no sound of the key in the lock. The door didn't creak open and shut. There was no sound of bare feet BUNKing down the hall.
I stood up, opened the door.
Homer looked up from where he lay just beside the door and whined, hurt that I'd locked him out.
I hurried down the hall, through the kitchen, through the living room. I clicked off the lock and slammed the door open.
Nothing.
No brown-haired, bare-footed girl in a green leotard. That meant no Jacqueline Rip, no paradox, nothing.
The phone rang.
Sighing, I closed the door, locked it, and got the phone.
"Jake?" It was Marco.
"She didn't come," I said. He was silent. "Sorry, man. I know you and Maria were close."
"Yeah." He hung up without saying anything more.
I called the others, saying simply, "She didn't come.
They all knew what I meant.
Everything was back to normal.
For the first time, I wished it wasn't.
CHAPTER 48
Jack
I ran home on four furry legs. I'd lost the pursuit, but that was balanced by the fact that I'd lost a pair of jeans, a good shirt, my best sneakers, and my lucky socks. I was really sulking over the socks.
I'm not always the most logical person. So sue me.
A car horn blasted me as I ran across the street, but I didn't care.
I leaped the neighbor's fence awkwardly, and hid in the shadows to demorph from Homer's form. Good thing I'd had the common sense to take the door key out of my jeans and stash it under the elastic of the arm of my morphing outfit. I pulled it out of the short sleeve, where it was sitting on my shoulder. I hurried up the front steps, unlocked the door, went in quick, and shut the door behind me.
I hurried into the kitchen, my heart pounding. I looked at the refrigerator.
A yellow slip of paper read, "Gone to Maria's, emergency! Be back soon."
It was still there.
Instead of feeling the usual relief, I felt my stomach sinking into the floor.
I went down the hall, pausing outside my room. Homer looked up at me from where he lay outside my door, then closed his eyes again. I gripped the doorknob for a moment, then slammed the door open.
The desk chair was empty.
The room was normal.
Just to be sure, I checked Tara's room. That was normal, too.
I called the others. I simply told them, "I'm not going this time."
They all knew what I meant.
Everything was back to normal.
For the first time, I wished it wasn't.
CHAPTER 49
Enienek
No story, no epic, has an end. Or a beginning. Or even a set path.
My path and Ellimist's shall cross again. Perhaps, we shall have to create another, like the one who has chosen Ellinek for their title, and female for their essence.
Existence is like a tree, each possibility branching out. Branches intertwine as separate paths create the same result. Nothing remembered what caused the initial branching - or, if something does, it has yet to reveal itself.
But a tree cannot stand alone. It is affected by outside things.
It is greatly affected by winds. Winds of chance, gusts of order, storms of necessity.
Especially by the powerful force of necessity.
Winds of chance cause branches that normally stand alone to clash together briefly, again and again. But a storm, like necessity, can interlock such branches together, permanently.
Winds do not come only once.
This epic is far from an end.
No epic has an end.
But this... this is a good place... to pause....
Don't leave me yet! Watch for
Animorphs Dementia: The Convergence
the real finale of Animorphs Dementia.