The next morning SpongeBob awoke with a pounding headache. He popped an aspirin, lit up a joint, and ate some more cereal. He might as well get it over with.

He meandered down the road to work. The weed getting him lost in his thoughts again. What could go wrong. What could right. What could go butt fucked.

The sound of a car slowing to stop screeched his ears finding no other than Squidward stopping in the middle of the street.

Spongebob paused for a moment then continued on

"Come on Spongebob, your debt has been paid you can ride with me if you want"

"I'm good"

Squidward inched forward with his car

"C'mon Spongebob I can smell the weed from here I know it must agony to walk a whole mile like that"

Spongebob paused and considered his options. Well…his legs were tired, and he felt weak from the three-day bender of nothing but drinks and cigarettes.

Without a word Spongebob climbed to the front seat and shut the door. With that, Squidward sped off to work.

They pulled up into the parking lot and came to a halt.

Spongebob started opening the door, but Squidward interrupted

"Are you supposed to be smoking?"

"What do you mean?"

"Drugs. You got busted for drugs, aren't they gonna test you?"

Spongebob shrugged his shoulders and carried on

"You'll end up in prison for sure if they catch you…didn't they say anything?"

Spongebob turned around sharply

"Squidward…shut up you sound like my mother"

Squidward huffed as he got out of the car.

Once inside Mr. Krabs was standing by the kitchen door eyeing Spongebob as he approached

"Good morning Mr. Squarepants"

SpongeBob replied with the finger which triggered a chesty laugh from Mr. Krabs

"Ah come on boy-o, it's a brand-new day!"

"In purgatory maybe"

"Spongebob" Mr. Krabs blocked the kitchen entrance and looked him up and down

"I want to apologize the other day for that to ya… but you had left me with no choice"

"I fucking hate you"

"Spongebob you have to remember that it was YOU who assaulted Mr. Squidward and it was YOU who tried to frame both him and I…you're lucky to be alive…if you weren't one of me best cooks my men and I would have thrown you to shore!"

Spongebob rolled his eyes

"Spongebob…you gotta man up and own your shit"

"I AM owning my shit! Doesn't mean what you have been doing isn't wrong! You still deal out of your office, and you still use fear and manipulation to get what you want! The number of times you have had me…"

Mr. Krabs slapped his hand on the sponges back

"Let bygones be bygones, ok? Look…You only owe me fifty dollars now so that should be doable. I'm saving your ass from my boys one last time…"

"Ya whatever"

Spongebob squeezed past the oversized crab and to the back where he started the prep for the day.

He doesn't understand why they are being so nice to him all of a sudden. Did they pity him? Are they planning something for him? What he definitely knows is that he cannot trust them

With that he took out another cigarette and lit it with the oven top. Savoring the harsh smokey flavor on his palette before letting the smoke go.

"Two Krabby patties deluxe with fries!"

Time to hit the nose to the grindstone and grind grind grind

—-

Snnnnnnort

"Oh, fuck ya"

Spongebob plugs his nose and snorts the little bit left of coke he copped from Mr. Krabs a few minutes ago. It was middle of lunch rush, and he needed a boost. Sprawled out in the cooler floor he started to see the room spin.

"Just take me away god"

Knock knock knock

A muffled "Spongebob! SPONGEBOB!" barked on

Squidward opened the door, looked downward and slapped his face

"Jesus Christ, get up dumbass! We have orders waiting!"

"Uggggh!"

Squidward grabbed Spongebob's left arm and helped him find his feet then took a hold of Spongebob's head and stared into his eyes

"Mr. Krabs doped you up again huh?"

Spongebob angrily pushed Squidward off and tended to the grill

"Fuck! These are burnt" As he scrapped the ruined patties and had them meet their disposed demise.

Squidward hurried out back to the register

"I would like three kiddie's meals and a regular number one combo please"

"Ok twenty-five thirty"

"Order up!"

Squidward leaned into the mic "Number sixty-four your order is ready!"

"Thank you"

"Whatever"

Sloosh "WAAAAAAH"

Squidward slapped his forehead and grabbed the mic

"Clean up table four"

Spongebob hurried out with a mop and floor sign. Vigorously moping the sticky cola off the floorboards.

"I wanna anotha!"

"Jeffery, mommy will get you another soda once the man is done ok?"

"I WANNA ANOTHAT SODA I WANNA ANOTHA SODA I WANN-"

"I can't"

Spongebob immediately left the scene and went to the freezer. An icy bottle of tequila stored in a box of lettuce burned the hands of the yellow sponge. In a blink of an eye Spongebob popped open the cap and gulped a few drinks.

Burrrp

He placed the bottle in the boxes and went back to the grill

"Two more krabby patties, Spongebob!"

Spongebob was finally feeling his rhythm. Took him long enough. He only had a few more hours to keep this up and then it was quittin time. Finally.

A couple orders in he hears a knock on the back door.

Could it be Sandy? Spongebob sent out the last few orders and skipped to the back. As he opened, he was met with the oversized bass that he dreaded seeing.

"Hello Spongeboob"

"Bubble bass…"

"Is this a bad time?"

"No no I can work and talk. Come on in"

Bubble bass squeezed past the door frame and sat on the rolling chair belonging to his beloved.

"When did you get out?"

Bubble bass took a deep inhale

"Just a day after you just as I predicted…where have you been?"

Spongebob was pulling out more veggies and cheese from the fridge and schlepping them to the prep table.

"I was home. Sick for a few days."

"I see…anyways let's get down to business…you're still in, aren't you?"

Spongebob paused chopping tomatoes for a sec and looked over

"Yes, I am"

"Good, because I brought some product over that I'll generously front you in the meantime"

SpongeBob's eyebrows raised in concern

"Front me? But you barely know me!"

Bubble bass smirked a little.

"Spongebob let's be serious for a second. First, I know you are broke as shit. You couldn't afford this anyways. Second, I know where you work, and third I know where you live. If you fucked me, I'd find you in twenty minutes tops."

"You know where I live?"

"Spongeboob, everyone knows you live in a fucking pineapple, it's no well-kept secret"

Spongebob was deeply uncomfortable hearing this but like hell he would let him know.

"Ok well what is this product you're talking about?"

Bubble bass gets up and reaches in his front pocket. He whips out a baggie of white pills and slams it on the prep table.

"Percs"

"You mean Percocet?"

"Yes, dimwit Percocet. Each pill is 10mg. It's the best shit you can find in this part of the Pacific"

Spongebob has never seen percs before or even gave thought to what it might look like. He's tried many things but never got his hands on prescription opioids.

"How much do you usually sell for?"

"Depends on the market. Usually, ten each with a deal like three for twenty-five and five for forty."

"Wow"

"Ya people will pay a high price for these babies"

Spongebob held the bag in his hands, squeezing each pill with his fingers.

"How much cut will I owe ya?"

"For that amount I expect one fifty…the rest is yours."

Spongebob smiled a genuine smile and set the bag down

"It's a done deal"

"Great…I expect to collect my one fifty in two weeks. I'll come here to collect"

Only two weeks?

Bubble Bass turned to leave but swiveled backwards

"Oh, and Spongebob?"

"Ya?"

"Don't be an idiot and get high off of your own supply"

Spongebob didn't say anything as he was afraid of making a weird noise. He extended his hand, and they shook and then off he went.

Two weeks to sell a bag of pills or he'll lose his legs. Better start planning.