The shift was over and everyone in the store was finishing up in their respectful sections.
"Twenty-three twenty-four twenty-five…"
Squidward scribbled in his notebook.
"Ok Mr. Krabs the drawer is cashed out"
"Alright Mr. Squidward…see you in the am!"
Squidward took off his cap and turned and faced the kitchen window.
"Spongebob, you almost done?"
Spongebob was in the middle of scrubbing the grill with oven cleaner and a steel brush. He looked up and wiped his forehead of sweat and grease.
"I still got a bit cleaning to do…maybe fifteen minutes worth…you can go ahead without me if you like"
Squidward waved him off
"It's fine I'll wait in the car" and with that he got out of the boat and walked through the double glass doors.
Spongebob listened for the slam of the doors before making his next move.
Slam.
Spongebob dropped the brush on the stove and went over to the sink to wash his hands. He could barely contain his excitement. His fingers were twitching attempting to grab a paper towel to dry off.
He walked over to his boss's door and gave a few knocks
"Can I come in?"
"Ya"
Spongebob creaked on the door to see Mr. Krabs counting dollars on his desk. Mr. Krabs looked up briefly followed by a large grin on his face.
"Ahoy laddy what can I do for ya?"
Spongebob shifted a little and grabbed his wrist. He didn't know how to approach such a situation.
"Mr. Krabs I-I…"
"Spit it out boy-o"
"I have a proposal"
Mr. Krabs grin shut to a tight-lipped smile. His eyes widened like a dog before meat.
"Go on"
"You and your boys sell coke right? But I'm sure there are other things you sell as well…"
"Yes lad, all the run of thee mill party goods…what are you trying to get at?"
"Well…you see... Um…"
Spongebob reaches into his pocket and pulls out the bag of pills from earlier. Mr. Krabs' smile disappeared and looked at the baggie with curiosity.
"You see…I bet you don't have something like this…"
"What is it Spongebob? Out with it!"
"Percocet"
Mr. Krabs leans back in his chair and rock a little back and forth. His nose and lips bunch up as if he's trying to get a whiff of the room.
Spongebob opened up the baggie and pulled out a pill
"Do you know what these are?"
"Yes, Spongebob I do"
"Well…then?"
"You want me to sell your shit for ya?"
Spongebob's eyes widened
"I mean…maybe some of if. I just need it gone within two weeks"
Mr. Krabs let out a laugh and stood up to walk closer
"I'll tell you what. I'll buy a third of your shit and test it out with some of my buddies' clients"
He wraps an arm around Spongebob's neck
"If it sells well, we might be able to work out a deal alright?"
Spnobgebob nodded and Mr. Krabs took his arm off to extend it
"Deal?"
Spongebob grabbed his arm and smiled
"Deal"
"Now then…let's talk price…"
—-
Squidward was sitting texting on his phone when the front door swung open and shut. He looked up to see a surprisingly chipper Spongebob hopping into his car.
"Sorry, that took long"
"All good"
Squidward threw his phone on the console and turned the key. He did a quick backup and sped off down the road.
Spongebob felt the side of his pants for the baggie now a bit lighter. He had to find a way to sell off the rest of them. But who does he know that would willingly try these?
He looked at Squidward. He might be interested. He is in AA though…and people trying to go straight edge are usually not the target.
But they're also the most vulnerable.
"Say Squidward"
"Squidward's eyes peered at Spongebob and then back to the road
"What?"
"I think I'm ready for that talk now"
Squidward continued staring ahead without a word. They pulled up to Squidwards driveway and he then turned the ignition off.
"Well…you coming?"
Spongebob hopped out of the car and followed Squidward to his door. Squidward pulled out his golden key chain and searched for the house master key.
"There you are fucker"
He opened the door with some force and headed inside. Spongebob followed again and was met with the same shadowy room as the night before.
Squidward flipped the lights on. Spongebob gasped.
The living room was actually much nastier than what he thought it was nights prior. The floor had stains and there were bottles piled in trash bags along the walls. The furniture was oddly still nice and so was the kitchen. Almost as if he separated half the room for trash and the other for comfort.
"Take a seat…want anything to drink? Water? Tea? Coffee?"
"Waters fine thanks"
Squidward filled a glass from the sink faucet and threw in a few ice cubes. He boiled some more water on the stove to use for some tea he made for himself.
Spongebob sat on the couch fidgeting a bit. He couldn't stop his hands from being sweaty and kept rubbing them on the cushions.
Squidward moseyed over with tea in one hand and water in the other.
"Here"
"Thank you" with that he took and gulp and ahhh'd
"Mind if I smoke in here?"
Squidward was about to take a sip from his cup but paused
"I'd rather you not"
Spongebob took another sit and sat the glass back down. This was excruciatingly awkward for him.
"So Squidward…"
"I would like to speak first"
Spongebob nodded.
"I've been thinking this through for a long time and I…I am having a hard time forgiving you."
Spongebob sat and stared but gave another nod.
"Spongebob…I know in the past I have been a real dick to ya and honestly, I admit it was only a matter of time before you blew up on me. I'll own up to that"
Squidward took another sip. Slower this time.
"But jesus christ…Spongebob I had to go to urgent care to get checked out! Nothing major but possible concussion and got a few stitches…still it was pretty traumatic to say the least"
Spongebob felt his eyes moistened and felt at loss of words
"I'm really sorry Squidward"
"I know you are…I can see it in your face…I just…can't believe you had that evil inside you to do such a thing"
Spongebob looked down to his feet and rubbed his chin
"I'm not proud of what I've done…but as you said…it was only a matter of time"
"But was it really all me?"
Spongebob jolted up. A few tears rolled down his cheeks.
"Squidward…you have no idea what else I'm going through right now…"
Squidward set his tea down on the coffee table and folded his hands.
"I can only imagine…I'm no stranger to dealing with some hard shit…but that's why I'm getting help…the other night kinda woke me up to my own problems" Squidward chuckled a bit at the irony.
Spongebob wiped away at his face and sat up straight.
"The AA right?"
Squidward nodded.
"I actually want to make a deal with you, Spongebob."
"Oh ya?"
"Yes. I…I actually want to drop the charges I have against you. This means all you'll have from now on is that possession charge hanging over your head…"
Spongebob's eyes widened but was once again at loss of words. What the fuck did he say?
"On condition however"
Spongebob shook his head out of his own weary trance and spoke swiftly
"What? What is it?"
"Two things actually. One I want you to pay off my copay for urgent care"
"Ok" Great. Another debt.
"And two…I want you to come to AA with me"
"I'm not a drunk though"
Squidward let out a sigh and moved over to the couch Spongebob sits on.
"Spongebob be real. Maybe you're not necessarily a drunk but you have a serious substance misuse issue. Anyone can see that"
"I mean…I guess if you count the coke I do…"
"Yes exactly that Spongebob"
"But I thought AA was just for drunks?"
"I mean mostly yes but we don't have an NA in town so it's the next best thing"
Spongebob looked at his hands, then his pocket, and back to Squidward.
"Fine, it's a deal"
Squidward grabbed Spongebob's hand and gave it a shake.
"I'm very glad. This will change your life Spongebob"
Spongebob shot back a smile.
"Well, I guess I best head home…"
Squidward stood up
"Ok that sounds good I guess I'll see you tomorrow then same time?"
"Ya"
Spongebob headed toward the front door but swiveled around
"Oh, hey Squidward?"
Squidward rose from picking up the cups from the table.
"You only can't drink right?"
Squidward raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms
"I mean, they encourage complete sobriety but yes the goal is alcohol abstinence"
"I actually wanna give you something…"
Spongebob reached into his pocket and pulled out a pill from the baggie. He extended his arm and opened his palm for his neighbor to see.
"What is that Spongebob?"
"It's this new pill I've been prescribed. The name slipped my mind…but it's been helping me stay calm at work and at night. Totally safe and totally legal…and it's helped me actually ween off the coke a little bit"
Squidward came closer and swiped the pill out of the palm. He brought it close to his eye and examined it.
"It's got no code indentations…That's a little strange"
"Well, it's not really something that is regulated. It's pretty low risk."
"I don't know Spongebob, it seems really sketchy and I'm trying not to get hooked on anything. You really have been weaning off the coke?"
"Ya a bit. This little fella has helped with cravings and all"
Squidward seemed to relax a bit and held the pill in his fist
"Thank you Spongebob, I appreciate this gesture. I'll see you in the morning."
Spongebob gave a nod and walked back out into the night.
—-
Squidward sat in between the sheets of his bed finishing up a chapter in one of his many books. With boredom, he placed the book back on his nightstand and tried to relax in his bed. He doesn't like to admit it but that night of the break in has caused him countless restless nights. As soon as he drifts off to sleep, he awakens in panic at the slightest change of sound. He's often staying up past three just attempting to surrender into sleeps arms. He remembered the pill Spongebob gave him. He reached in the drawer next to his bed and pulled it out.
"Well…if it worked for him surely it should work for me"
He popped it in his mouth and laid back into the bed.
Sure enough, the pill worked his magic and dragged Squidward along to dreamland.