Nesta sat in the library in a corner where no one could see her. Just in case, she had a stack on random novels next to her. The pregnancy book on her lap could easily be hidden under any one of them.

There was so much that she didn't know. Where was she going to buy a crib? Where would she get onesies and toys and blankets? Where could she visit a healer who would be discrete enough not to tell their high lord or even gossip to any of their friends? Where would she get diapers? If the baby had wings, would Cassian teach them to fly?

A thought suddenly crossed her mind. Would Cassian expect her to send her child to the Illyrian war camps if the baby was male and had wings? She blanched at the thought. She couldn't let her baby become some bloodthirsty warrior before he even knew how to read… If her child decided to be a soldier, that was one thing, but raising her child to be a soldier? That was something Nesta definitely was NOT going to do. Her child needed to be free to become whatever they wished.

Nesta laughed a bit at herself. They were SO not there yet. She still needed to decide so many things: when did she want to know the baby's sex? What would she name the baby?

And above all: how would she tell Cassian?

There was a lot more to worry about too. Nesta was very concerned about keeping her baby healthy. She knew that the books recommended seeing a healer as soon as possible, and she REALLY didn't want to find out later about some kind of disease that she could have prevented by doing something different, but she didn't know where to go.

Another random thought crossed her mind. Cassian was around 600 years old. He had most definitely had other lovers and (though he didn't talk about it) relationships. Had he ever had a child before? Nesta didn't think so, but she'd never exactly asked him…

There was so much she didn't know.

The books said that she would very soon be craving all sorts of strange foods, that her feet would get so bloated that she'd need new shoes, that her stomach would get so huge that she wouldn't be able to see her feet…

Apparently, there was also the matter of hormones, mood swings and 'pregnancy brain' which would cause her to be more forgetful and emotional. Some women even lost hair and their body changed shape irreversibly…

Nesta giggled to herself, not caring that she probably seemed crazy. Her body couldn't change more than it had. Her hips widening or whatever was going to happen couldn't compare to her ears becoming pointy and all of her senses becoming sharper when she'd stopped drowning in the Cauldron.

Although she was sure that giving birth was going to hurt like nothing she'd ever felt before.

Once she got home, Nesta decided to try on a few of the outfits she'd gotten. The first a sweater-style dress, in dark gray (since dark colors were slimming). It had a turtle neckline, but had a white v design at the chest (to keep the eyes away from her belly). It ended a little underneath her knees and would go well with a pair of long boots.

The next was a long, drapey, periwinkle dress. It would look fabulous paired with her black jacket, and it wouldn't hug her body so no one would be able to tell.

Then, there was a pleated, light pink dress with a v-neckline and semi-sheer long sleeves. It looked incredible, if she dared say so herself.

Next, Nesta put on a ankle-length wrap dress with a floral pattern. It was slightly large on her, but she knew she'd soon grow into it (especially since her breasts were going to get larger).

Lastly, there were her two favorite dresses: a dark green velvet dress and a dusty-rose colored wrap dress with kimono-style short sleeves.

Nesta grinned. It had been a long time since she'd gone shopping and actually bought whatever she liked.

Mainly because she never had the money or felt like it. After pulling herself out of her drunken stupor almost half a year ago, Nesta had at first relied on the money Feyre gave her each month as part of their initial agreement for Nesta to stay in Velaris. Still, Nesta had known that she wouldn't ever be able to use the money for anything besides alcohol without feeling indebted and resentful to Feyre. Thus, without telling anyone, she'd begun working. At first, she'd worked for a couple months at a cafe, but after the Inner Circle came to visit the cafe one day as she hid in the backroom, she had resigned. She'd then taken a job setting up for a new bookstore that was soon going to open: no one came to the shop and so there was no chance for the Inner Circle to accidentally find her. It mostly involved hauling heavy boxes and organizing books. That job was ending soon, though. The shop was going to open in 10 days and after that, they could not keep Nesta employed: the owner would run the register and could only keep two or three other employees to run the shop with them, all of whom had known the owner for far longer and had far more experience and education. The owner had apologized many times to Nesta, but she'd waved him off, certain she'd find another job. Thankfully, she hadn't spent very much over the past few months, and was able to splurge on dresses without worrying about her savings. Still, Nesta knew she needed to find a new job fast, preferably in the next 5 days, before her job ended. She'd try in a few days, Nesta decided. Although she barely had any skills… Perhaps she'd be able to work in a hair salon, as she knew how to braid and cut hair? Nevermind that Nesta hated the mere thought of that, since doing other people's hair had always been such a personal, intimate experience for Nesta. The thought of doing it for strangers in exchange for money made her shudder, but for her baby Nesta would do it. Maybe it wasn't so bad if Nesta could convince herself that she was doing it for her baby and not for strangers…

The next day, after work, Nesta idly strolled the streets of Velaris, feeling oddly at ease.

Since the shop was soon opening, there wasn't much left to do, and they let her work for 4 hours in the morning and then have the afternoons off.

That morning, she hadn't felt nauseous and she actually had woken up energized. She felt strangely calm and happy, despite all her uncertainties and worries. She looked around at the display windows in the shops, studying the different patterns in which the shops showed off their products.

She stopped in front of a shop where the display seemed haphazard. There were beautiful products inside, yet on the display table, it seemed as though products had simply been randomly placed. There were also far too many items, making the display crammed and overall unpleasant to the eye. Was this done on purpose? Nesta didn't think so, but she couldn't be sure. Normally, she would have simply walked away. Today, however, she was in a strange mood.

Taking one look at the shop's name - Brielle's Boutique - she entered. It was fairly small, with lilac-colored walls and small glass pendant lights hanging from the ceiling at different lengths, resembling a glass mobile of stars. The lights gave the shop an elegant look.

Unfortunately, the shelves, despite being less cramped than the display table, seemed to have no real organization. On one shelf, there were seashell collections next to a jar of candy, right next to a pile of books; on another, necklaces lay next to women's undergarments and colored pencils.

Perhaps Nesta would have simply walked out of the store, shaking her head at the waste of such beautiful items due to the terrible organization, if not for the fact that, at the precise moment when Nesta was contemplating the shop, a female entered the shop from the backroom.

"Hello," the female called out. "Can I help you find anything?"

The female had light brown skin and brown hair with a golden tint: she seemed to be from the Dawn court, but Nesta didn't want to assume. Still, it was rare to see people in Velaris who appeared to be from other parts of the world.

Nesta hesitated for a moment, before saying, "Are you Brielle?"

"What?" The female seemed taken aback for a moment.

"I- the shop's called Brielle's Boutique, right? Are you the owner?" Nesta inquired, somewhat gently.

The female nodded, then laughed slightly. "I am, yes. Sorry, it's just that I used to work at my aunt's shop for the longest time. We finally managed to get a spot on this road with all the other boutiques, which was my aunt's dream, but she decided to stay with my cousin at the other location and named this one after me. I'm not used to running this place. It only really opened two weeks ago."

Nesta listened to the female. Then Nesta, feeling somewhat bold, said, "You have very nice things in this boutique, Brielle, but you should probably sort out the shelves to make it easier to shop."

Brielle laughed. "Thanks for the suggestion- Sorry, what was your name?"

"Nesta," she replied.

Brielle smiled. "Thank you, Nesta. I've been a little overwhelmed running this place, to be honest. I'm used to accounting, and running the register, but I've never really had much experience with the other side of things. I really appreciate suggestions."

Nodding, Nesta added, "You know, your display window is a bit cramped. I feel like your products would be easier to see if you displayed less of them, maybe with a color theme or a seasonal theme."

Brielle nodded, then cocked her head to the side. "Nesta, where do you work right now?"

"At a bookstore."

"Any chance you'd be willing to work here? I really do need some help, and I think your ideas could help sales increase a lot."

Nesta hesitated. She was looking for a job, but she knew, from her experience in the cafe, that she didn't want to be interacting with customers so much, since she didn't want to run into the Inner Circle. Especially now that she was going to hide her pregnancy… On the other hand, she really did need to save money to buy things for her baby. She needed to be able to provide for her child, whether or not Cassian was in their lives.

Seeing Nesta's hesitation, Brielle added quickly, "You'd be able to work flexible hours, since it's just the two of us and you could really make decisions about the direction of the boutique. You'll get a big chunk of our profit. It'll be percentage-based, so if your ideas help the boutique alot, your salary will also increase. Based on everything you've said, I'm sure that will happen. If you need vacations or something, you can just tell me beforehand and I can give you time off. Plus, there's tea in the backroom."

Nesta considered it for a moment. She knew that a job with flexible hours and vacations would truly come in handy once her due date approached. She wasn't entirely sure she would be able to bring her baby into the shop (surely crying infants would drive away customers) but at least for now, it was a good option. Really, it was her only option, unless she wanted to cut hair. "Okay," Nesta said. "I'll do it."

"Yay!" Brielle exclaimed, grinning. Her joy was contagious and Nesta's lips quirked as well.

"So, is there some sort of uniform I need to wear, or anything that I should learn or train for?" Nesta asked after a few seconds.

"Oh!" Brielle tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. It seemed like a habit. "Um, not really. You can wear whatever, you know, just keep it appropriate and comfortable."

"When should I start?"

"When do you want to start? You could start tomorrow, or whenever, really."

Nesta blinked, surprised. "Well, I need to finish up this week at the bookshop. Can I start next week?"

"Sure!" Brielle nodded. Then she took out a notebook. "I usually open the boutique at around 9:30 am and close around 4:30 pm, so you would need to be here between 9 and 5 whenever you want to work a full day. Usually once a week, we have half day but there isn't really a set time for that…" Brielle grinned a little sheepishly. "Also, I was thinking that on one of the weekdays, we should have a day off, but I haven't picked a day yet. I was going to pick based on the day when there were the least customers…"

"Okay, well, um, I'll come back next monday, and then we can decide about a schedule and put it on the door," Nesta said, gently but firmly. (One might even say her tone was somewhat motherly).

"Great! I can't wait!" Brielle smiled. "I mean, don't get me wrong, I love having my own boutique, but it's kind of lonely to work here alone. Even when there are customers, it's still a bit lonely to eat my lunch by myself. I'm glad you'll be here to keep me company and give the boutique your brilliant ideas!"

Nesta wondered whether she'd find Brielle's chatter irritating on a regular day. Today clearly wasn't a regular day. Nesta felt as though she could do anything. Well, almost anything. Telling Cassian was definitely on NOT on the list of things she could do. The thought was sobering and almost spoiled her mood, but then Nesta saw a box of macarons in the corner of the shop.

"Brielle?" she asked.

"Hmm?"

"How much are these macarons?"

"They're… you know what, for you, they're free."

Nesta began to protest, despite secretly hoping that she wouldn't have to pay for the (most likely overpriced) macarons.

"Really, Nesta, I insist. Think of it as a welcoming gift."

Nesta wanted to protest a bit more: she didn't need charity and didn't want to feel indebted… but really this was a present, not a loan, and Nesta was REALLY craving macarons all of a sudden.

"Thank you so much, Brielle!" Nesta said in an uncharacteristically joyful tone.

Brielle's face lit up. "See you monday, Nesta!"

Nesta exited the boutique and went home.

Despite the commute to her house being only a 15 minute walk, Nesta couldn't resist eating 2 out of the 6 macarons in the box.

AN:

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