Here's a little fun oneshot in honor of the 'spooky season' being around the corner.
Disclaimer: The Plum Universe belongs to JE. Mistakes are my bad.
Stephanie's POV
"Ready?" Lester asked me when he popped his head into my cubicle.
"Yes." I replied as I stood up from my desk, swiftly attaching my utility belt.
"Cool. Let's roll." Lester announced before leading the way towards the elevator.
I followed after him, hiding my grin because payback's a bitch.
Last month Lester duped me by telling me that Ramon had made his famous bowl of fruit. He told me that Ramon was looking to share some with me since I'd never tried it before. When I stormed into the break room, sure enough Ramon was sitting on one of the tables with a big bowl of mouth watering fresh fruit in front of him. When he spotted me standing nearby, Ramon, being his charitable self, offered me some. Not thinking anything of it, I said yes to which Ramon's eyes lit up with excitement.
"Oh God!" I wailed the moment the burn of the hot sauce he drenched on the watermelon cubes traveled down my esophagus. That burn reached my stomach quickly, along with said fruit and I felt like my mouth was on fire almost instantly.
"Need some water, Beautiful?" Lester's smirk was evidence enough of his guilt. He knew that Ramon's snack was spicy as hell! Since my eyes were watering by that point, I couldn't do much to retaliate right then and there.
"Have some yogurt." Ella offered when she joined the party. In a matter of minutes, the room was filled with every man not on monitor duty.
"Another one bites the dust." Zip shook his head as I spooned some disgusting plain low fat yogurt into my mouth.
"Yeah, always say no to Ramon when it comes to food." Slick added oh so not helpfully. Too late.
"Hey!" Ramon objected before another mouthful.
"If he says something is not spicy, it's spicy." Junior shared as he passed me a bottle of water.
"And if Ramon says it's a little spicy, it's literal fire." Ram added.
"If he admits that it is spicy, that's an atomic bomb. Nope!" Manny pipped in.
"It's not even spicy." Ramon scoffed as he continued to eat, meanwhile he was red-faced and sweating. He's full of crap!
"It burns." I cried as I closed my teary eyes, mentally willing the flames of spicy hell to go away.
Lester got the last laugh that day for his prank, but I vowed to get him back. Since I'm petty, I've played the long game. Yes, I'm not known to be patient. However, that's exactly why my plan was genius. Lester probably thinks that he's in the clear, safe from my payback. He probably thinks I forgot.
Oh but he's wrong. Very, very wrong.
"So, what's the plan?" I asked as we loaded into our fleet SUV.
We're headed to a walk-through. Basically, it's our job to go through the prospective client's home and offer the best security package for them. Because we have to do a lot of talking, my idea to get back at Lester is perfect. I didn't even know what my retaliation would be until last night when I stopped at 7-11 to replenish my ice cream stash.
"The ush." Lester replied just like I knew he would, indicating that he wanted to use our usual approach.
"Run it by me just to be sure we're on the same page?" I used my best clueless voice, the one I use on my target's during a distraction. It never fails.
"Okay." Lester gave me a side glance before he pulled out of the Rangeman underground garage. Once he hooked a right on Haywood, I passed him my trick. "Thanks." Lester said distractedly before he tore into the packaging. "Are you proposing, Beautiful?" Lester flashed me his patented playful smirk as he shoved the Ring Pop on the tip of his left ring finger. There was no way the poor thing would fit his thick fingers.
Thankfully, he didn't pay too much attention to the wrapper as he crushed it into a ball to shove it into the empty mini trash can he keeps wedged between his seat and the center console. If he had, he'd have noted that this wasn't an ordinary Ring Pop. No, the ones I bought are the special 'tongue painters' edition. Of course, I made sure to give him a blue pop. He's going to have a very bright colored tongue as he's making his sales pitch to our client. Ha!
"The plan?" I urged after teasing him back, telling him that this wasn't a proposal.
"Fine." He said as he shoved the candy between his lips. "I'd say yes, by the way." He threw out with obvious mischief in his tone before he switched gears into our work.
I smiled as I unwrapped my Ring Pop. If I didn't have one too, he'd get suspicious. Plus, I didn't care if my tongue gave away that I had some candy. No one will bat an eye with me, because I regularly have sweets. Plus, I chose a red one. Lester's bright blue tongue will be way more obvious than mine.
Lester drove for about fifteen minutes by the time I realized that I'd really miscalculated this whole payback plan. I wanted to get a peek of the damage through the mirror on the sun visor while Lester was busy hooking a left turn. It was then that I noted that the whole 'tongue painter' advertising was misleading. Not only was my tongue bright red, but so were my teeth and half of my lips.
Oh shit.
Thinking fast, I did the only thing that I could do: fully committed, making sure that all of my lips were red.
"You put on lipstick?" Lester asked when he parked on the curb in front of our potential client's massive home. When he turned his head to face me, I saw that his lips were partially bright blue. As he continued talking, I confirmed that yup his teeth and tongue were very blue as well.
"Mmmhmm." I nodded as I reached for my door handle, not wanting to out myself and show him the inside of my mouth.
"Are you two from Rangeman?" A man answered the door, giving Lester a skeptical look.
"Yes." Lester being his charming self, went about his part animatedly. The man, Mr. Campbell, simply nodded and allowed us inside the home after we flashed him our Rangeman credentials. To keep my cover, I stayed slightly behind Lester so he wouldn't catch on.
Was this a bad idea? Maybe.
Do I regret doing it? No.
We went around the downstairs portion of the home without incident. If Mr. Campbell thought it was weird for the security representatives Rangeman sent to have colored tongues, he didn't mention it.
Once we moved on to the upstairs part of the home, a little someone nearly derailed the whole thing.
"I want one." A little girl around my niece Lisa's age tugged on the cargo pocket by my left knee, eagerly pointing to my mouth. When I tried to pretend like I didn't know what she was referring to, she quickly pointed towards Lester's mouth.
"Want what?" Lester asked the little girl. In response, the little girl clamped her mouth shut. A sad look crossed Mr. Campbell's face before leading Lester into the next part of the home.
"Shh." Luckily, I still had one more Ring Pop stuffed in my cargo pockets. I should have felt a little guilty for giving her the blue raspberry flavor, but it was the only pop I had left with me.
"Thank you!" She said, darting away to enjoy her treat.
The rest of our appointment was uneventful. Mr. Campbell must be used to weird occurrences since he never brought up our colorful tongues.
"That's why our A package is the best for your and your family's needs." Lester finished his sales pitch by throwing his widest smile Mr. Campbell's way. I had to look away to hide my grin after seeing Lester flash his blue stained teeth.
"Uhm, yes that's fine." Mr. Campbell again didn't even bat an eye, quickly agreeing to the next available installation date I proposed. "Yes, tomorrow morning works." With Mr. Campbell's sale closed, we left shortly after.
On the drive back I kept myself busy writing notes on the online order form to make it smoother for the installation team.
"What's your ETA?" The control room calling to ask for our ETA isn't necessarily a bad thing when we're out in the field, but it wasn't ideal to be sent on another sales call when we looked so unconventional.
"Ten minutes." Lester explained that we had to take a detour due to an accident blocking a big intersection on our route.
"You're expected in Ranger's office when you get back." Cal's voice was quite serious.
"Someone's in trouble." Lester teased, hinting that maybe Ranger was going to 'punish' me for being bad. Of course, this is Lester we're talking about so he made its sound quite suggestive.
"Both of you." Cal clarified before disconnecting.
"10-4." Lester sighed even though the control room was no longer on the line.
By the time we unloaded on the fifth floor, I could tell that the reason why we were being summoned to Ranger's office was strictly business. The icy atmosphere told me all I needed to know: it's serious. Shit.
The men gave us funny looks as we passed them on our way to Ranger's office.
"Oh, man. What did I do?" Lester looked mortified as we neared Ranger's door.
I knocked on the closed wooden door, buying a few extra seconds before we faced our maker.
"Come in." Ranger called. Lester braved this a lot better than I did, opening the door with resignation.
"You wanted to see us, Boss?" I asked as I stood right next to Lester, quickly noting that Ranger was in the power seat behind his desk. He was dressed in a suit and tie, reminding me that Corporate Ranger is a sight to behold. Yummy.
"Yes." His dark eyes roamed over my uninformed form, silently showing me that he likes Rangeman Stephanie too.
"This is Jade Campbell." Ranger introduced the woman sitting across from his desk. Ranger used his business tone as he introduced us, even as his eyes promised me a good time afterwards.
"Mrs. Campbell has something to share with you two." Tank's booming voice made me redirect my attention to him. His imposing form towered over Mrs. Campbell as he moved to stand behind her seated form.
"Hi." Mrs. Campbell waved at us, giving me the impression that perhaps this wasn't a walk the plank type of summons. "I was leaving my office when I got a video call from my husband." She said she worked nearby, which explained how she beat us to the building. "He wanted to show me that our daughter Emily was sporting a bright blue tongue, teeth and lip combo." Three sets of eyes shifted to Lester, no doubt noting that he too wore the same combo as he stood beside me with parted lips. "When I asked how that happened, Emily shared that it was from candy." Mrs. Campbell went on to say that her daughter ratted out the candy-giver as the security people.
"Candy…" Lester frowned, not connecting the dots fast enough.
Okay, so he deserved payback. Sure. But Lester doesn't deserve to be punished for something I did.
"It was me." I blurted out to get the heat off of Lester. "I gave your daughter a Ring Pop." I shared how she came up to me, tugged on my cargo pocket and asked me for one. "I'm sorry." I apologized profusely for not asking Mr. Campbell if it was okay to do so before giving the kid candy.
"Hey!" Lester exclaimed when he finally saw the effects of the pop on me. "Am I…?" He asked the room with narrowed eyes as he ran his thumb across his bottom lip, flicking his eyes down as if he could see for himself without assistance.
"I'm not mad." Mrs. Campbell was quick to interject. "Quite the opposite in fact." It was my turn to frown when she said she simply wanted to thank me.
"What?" I briefly wondered if the artificial coloring was messing with my brain.
"Emily is a selective mute." Mrs. Campbell explained that her daughter hasn't spoken to anyone outside of her and her husband in years.
"She asked me for the candy." I defended, misinterpreting what Mrs. Campbell was trying to convey. In passing, I thought she was disputing my version of events.
"I'm not doubting that." Mrs. Campbell told me that Emily herself told her what happened. "I just wanted to say thank you." Mrs. Campbell's gray eyes filled with moisture, silently indicating that their journey with Emily hasn't been easy.
Tank escorted Mrs. Campbell back to her car after she gave me an unexpected tight hug.
"Dismissed." Ranger ordered. "Not you, Babe." Ranger clarified when I turned to follow after Lester.
"Yes, Bossman?" I threw out, turning to face Ranger as I heard his door close behind my partner. It was easy to hear the men good-naturedly teasing Lester with my close proximity to the hall.
"Come here, Babe." The twitch in Ranger's mouth told me that he found my whole playful retribution apropos.
"I didn't expect for it to be so obvious." I explained as I rounded the corner of his desk, settling myself on his lap.
"Babe." Ranger's grin and his tone said 'only you' as he cupped one of his big hands on the back of my neck to pull me down for a hello kiss. "Mmm, Cherry." Ranger guessed correctly, earning him another tongue heavy kiss.
"I have one more in my shoulder bag." I suggested when we parted for air long moments later.
"Babe." Ranger groaned as I shifted on his lap, brushing a hardening part of his anatomy with my ass.
That was Ranger speak for I'm game, Babe.
In case you're wondering, yes the Ring Pop 'tongue painters' will paint your tongue, teeth and lips a bright color. Source? Trust me.