One Last Time

by Castlefan6

Authors Note: This is AU; Kate's mom is alive, still happily married to Jim. The experiment of Kate and Rick living together, happily ever after is killed when she takes the Fed job only 7 months into their coupling. Only to return to New York 13 months later, BUT Rick isn't there.

I don't own Castle; I only use the characters for amusement purposes, except the ones I create.

Also, we take liberties with the timeline from Canon and use events to make this a more believable fiction, thanks. A different outcome from Watershed, at least for now. No Guarantee this will be Caskett Ending, but leaning that way now.

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Chapter 8

Beckett's Apartment

Very Early Next Morning

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Kate glanced at the clock, a full 8 minutes later than the last time she had looked, and almost 14 from the time before that. She finally decided that sleep was not to come, she might as well get up, go for her run, and decide if she was going to drop the letter with Eduardo, or have a messenger service pick it up, deliver it, and require his signature upon receipt.

She decided on the messenger service, she called and arranged a pickup surprisingly in ten minutes. A few moments later she heard a quiet knock on her door, gun in hand, she slowly opened the door to reveal a bike messenger, about 18 years old, who almost fainted when he saw her gun.

"Sorry, I'm a cop, can't take chances at this hour of the morning," she said, but it didn't relieve him any.

"Do, I mean, Miss you have an account with us, don't you? He finally got out still trembling, as he looked at the gun.

"Yes, I do, it's under the same name as the return address" she replied, which was the only information he needed as he turned his bike and headed for the stairs. "Great, we'll bill you for it, goodbye" a voice that sounded at least an octave higher than he normally spoke got out weakly and he was gone,

She grabbed her jogging clothes and shoes, tucked her gun in the strategic spot, key, and her small wallet she always carried with enough cash for her coffee and her credentials as a cop. She was a full hour earlier than normal, but the coffee shop across from Rick opened at 4:00 AM, hell she was just getting tea, all that was required for that was hot water and the tea bag.

She knew Rick wouldn't be able to sleep unless he had changed a great deal from their time together, which was highly unlikely. He would often spend the evening in his office, so as not to disturb her if he had things bothering him, but she couldn't remember one time he slept, especially when something had happened to Martha or Alexis.

She jogged on her route, now approaching his Loft, her breath was suddenly hard to come by, but she pushed on, and she was correct, his office light burned bright, and she could only imagine what he was going through. Losing a parent was tough, losing your only parent who had been your rock for almost four decades would be unspeakable. She knew no matter how hard she tried she would never be able to know the depth of his loss.

She ducked into the coffee shop and made her tea; she had tried coffee yesterday, the first time in almost three years, and paid for it dearly so she won't be repeating that. Still, she needed caffeine, almost as a smoker needed nicotine, and tea was the best option. She made her cup of Earl Gray and found a small booth, the same as the day before, with Rick's window in her line of sight.

Today there was a lot of activity, and it definitely was Rick walking around in his office, then her heart melted. A lady, looking every bit like the starlets he had dated previously, took him into an embrace, held him for quite a while, then kissed him. They started a conversation from what she could see, BUT she had seen MORE than she hoped for. She made her way out of the shop, throwing the half-full cup of liquid in the trash, and set a fast pace for home.

She didn't stop to get her second tea as usual, but rather met the paper man coming down the stairs, the look she had on her face must have frightened him because for once, he didn't stand and lurk at her. He got out of the building as fast as he could. She reviewed her paper, Martha's picture was on the entertainment section front page, with the headline, Loss of a New York Legend, in bold ink above a very flattering article.

She jumped into the shower and began to get ready for her day, Lord knows what today will bring. She had just gotten dressed and was going to start on her hair, and makeup when her phone rang.

"This is Captain Beckett," she answered,

"Kate, It's Paula. I hope I'm not interrupting anything, but I wanted to give you the details since for once the paper got it correct and didn't publish them as Rick requested." She said,

"No Paula, I was just getting ready for work, how is he doing, how is Alexis?" She asked with concern in her voice,

"You know Rick, he's going to soldier on and be the strong one for everyone, Alexis, and Cathy, not so much. Alexis has lost not only her grandmother but her Grams, her confidant for so many years who would work behind the scenes on her behalf.

"Cathy has only been in the family for a few years, but Martha loved her, and that love was returned. She's trying to be strong, but, it's tough, well we all are. Gina is a wreck, you would think that ex-mother in-laws wouldn't rate high on the love scale, I guess Martha proved that not all are alike." She said with a smile in her voice,

"I can relate Paula, I'm sorry I jumped on your conversation, did you want to tell me something?" Kate apologized

"Yes, as I was saying, Martha gave strict orders, so there will be a service at the funeral home, Ripepi, and Sons, on Lexington and 8th Ave, the day after tomorrow, or Friday at 11:00 AM. It will be about 75 people or less with Rick giving the Eulogy, and a short service by Father McNair from St. Johns, then just the family will follow the hearse for interment in the private family vault, with a dinner at LeCerque beginning at 2:30 PM. I need to confirm the guests at dinner, so will you be attending both Kate?"

"Yes, Paula, yes, I will. Thanks for keeping me informed, I appreciate it." She said softly,

"Eh, Kate, I think I should tell you; I know I mentioned Cathy, well, she's been the only woman that Rick has seen for at least two years now, and well, she's liked by all of Rick's friends. I just thought you should be prepared for what you're walking into" Paula said,

"Thanks, Paula, I figured some lucky woman, without my baggage wouldn't take long to snag him, I appreciate you telling me," Kate said, fighting back tears,

"Well, NOTHING is official between them, so it's not a done deal, but, well, I don't want to get your hopes up, I mean even if you"

"I understand Paula, Thank You, I'll see you Friday, I appreciate your kindness more than you know." She said softly, hoping she would hang up, she didn't know how much longer she could fight the tears.

"Sure, Kate, hang in there. I'll see you Friday" and hung up, just before Kate's tears fell. She couldn't hold them back any longer. At least Paula was kind in telling her that Cathy had been the only woman for about two years, she guessed it was kept quiet from everyone, the reason why Alexis didn't know about her. She had just returned from London and her degree and was taking supplemental classes at Columbia when they had their encounter.

She had work to do, and she knew who was invited so she had to arrange coverage for the precinct for Friday, normally not that many resources would be allowed to attend the same event, but this was for Rick, it was Martha for God's sake. She would pull resources from other precincts if necessary, knowing she wouldn't get any pushback from Mayor Weldon.

She arrived at the precinct, and asked Roz to join her, she wanted her input on the plan. Surprisingly enough Roz knew the other divisions within their precinct well enough they came up with a plan that would staff the 12th, without help from other precincts. It involved some overtime, still a far better option than cross staffing, that would have meant she would owe some Captain favors if she had to go that route.

Roz was apprehensive but finally spoke up, "Kate, we know this is a bitch for you to have to go through, but hey, we're here for you. I'm sure you and Rick can find a few moments and talk if that's what you want. Let me know if you need me to cover for you, but don't let this get around, it'll ruin my reputation as a bitch." She laughed softly, trying to ease Kate's spirit a bit,

"Secret is safe with me, Roz, and Thanks!" she smiled as she squeezed her arm gently, Roz left, and now she had to get through the next few days the best she could.

XxX

The Loft

8:00 AM

Alexis answered the door buzzer to find a bike messenger asking for Mr. Richard Castle, his signature was required on the form, for his delivery.

"Dad, you have a messenger service with something requiring your signature." She called out, as she saw Rick walking towards the door.

She nor Cathy thought much about it since they just assumed it had something to do with Gram's service or estate. Rick showed his driver's license from Texas.

"Sir, this is from Texas, do you live here or in Texas sir?" The young man asked,

"Both, I moved to Texas, but this is my summer home, now are you satisfied, just record the DL number and let me sign for the letter." He said, a little irritated at the nerdy young man who seemed to have trouble understanding that many people had dual residences, not that it was any of his business.

The young man must have gotten the message, as he turned the clipboard and driver's license back to Rick, once he signed, he handed him the letter. No matter how angry the young man was, he counted on tips to survive so the look of shock on his face when Rick had a $50 bill attached under his pen as he handed things back.

"Thank you, Mr. Castle, I really appreciate this, he said as he made his way to the elevator.

Rick stood there for a moment, looking out the window until Alexis caught his glance and nudged Cathy. Who rose and quickly made her way to him.

"Is everything all right, sweetheart?" she asked, as she wrapped her arm around his waist. This was the time she was going to protect him, God, knows he had always taken care of everyone else, during this time, he needed someone to take care of him. With his grief, he tried to put on a solid front, but both Alexis and Cathy knew he was about to go to pieces.

"I should have figured she'd pick this time to do something like this" Rick said, still looking out the window, a little harsher than he planned, as he handed the letter to Cathy.

"It's a letter from Beckett, Alexis, she turned her head back to him, "I'll put it on your desk, Rick, do with it as you wish, it's none of my business, but I'm here if you want or need to talk," Cathy said softly as she leaned up to kiss his cheek.

He pulled her into a hug, kissed her, and said, "What would I do without you, or my young lady over there?" trying to smile, but tears filled his eyes.

"The bigger question is what would we do without you Rick, you don't know how big an anchor you are to us all. If you need to do something to help you let out your grief, sweetheart, PLEASE do it for me, for Alexis.

"Daddy, remember how we used to go to the Hamptons, just you and me, even in the middle of the winter, just to get a few hours to think things out when something bad happened when I was small, maybe Cathy would like to go with us.

"I mean if you want, I would be happy to drive and let you and Cathy have your privacy to deal with this." Alexis said as she walked over to the two, Cathy's arm snaked around her waist pulling her close, whispering "Thanks" quietly in her ear.

"Well, I only have to write the Eulogy, so maybe it would be good to go away today, we could drive back tomorrow, and still have plenty of time to prepare for the service on Friday. I don't feel like dealing with the press, as he pointed down to the throng of reporters now gathered outside the loft, keeping legal distance away from his bodyguards. "Cathy, what do you think?"

"I think Alexis is spot on, we need to get out, and away from these human vultures waiting for one slip-up, one mistake and they would make your mother's service more of a Hollywood Event than the reverent goodbye it is supposed to be. I can be ready in twenty minutes, Alexis how about you?

"Same Cathy, and I agree, Dad you can't write what you'd like to say knowing the jackals are waiting outside," Alexis replied,

"OK, we leave in 30 minutes, Alexis you drive the Escalade, and we'll use the back private entrance. I'll alert Mike to be sure we have no lurkers back there.

XxX

Three Hours Later

The Hamptons.

They arrived at the Hamptons a few hours later, Alexis had driven and taken some odd routes to ensure they had lost the paparazzi, once on the open road, Rick laid his head on Cathy's shoulder, and was asleep in just a few minutes, no longer able to stave off the exhaustion he felt in his body, mind, and soul.

"Is he asleep Cathy?" Alexis asked as she noticed her shifting his head to rest more on her breasts to keep his neck from getting a crick when he woke.

"Out like a baby Alexis, it's not surprising, I don't know how he made it this long without collapsing. This was a good idea, so thank you, for me, and your Dad." She said softly,

"Well, I know you care about him and understand how he, we felt about Grams, so thank you for the support when we needed it the most. Daddy always came up here when he was stuck on a story, or even sometimes in life, what decision would be best for the family, he would retreat here for a day or so." Alexis said softly, she didn't mention that

The last time was when Kate had decided to take the job in Washington D.C. He drove to the Hamptons and finished not only the fourth but also the finale of the Heat series in less than two days before accompanying her to Oxford the following day. They pulled up and entered as the large gates swung open. Alexis still on full guard drove around the garage to the service entrance, so no one could see who was going into the house.

Cathy remembered some other times that she and Rick had slipped away and visited this beautiful home, mostly for him to comfort her, she had no idea where he drew his strength from.

FLASHBACK

This wasn't Cathy's first trip to the Hamptons, in fact shortly after she and Rick had become intimate, they went on a two-month vacation, each one showing the other some homes, they owned. Rick had the Hamptons, The Loft, in addition to the CASTLE as Gina named it in Huntsville Texas as well as two homes that Meredith had lived in located in the Los Angeles suburbs before she moved in with her current boyfriend.

Rick was afraid to sell either home, he knew it was just a matter of time, or WHEN the new man threw her out, that she would need somewhere to live, and she wasn't coming to New York, or Texas unless she paid her way. He would allow her to live in her choice of homes in California, only because she was his daughter's mother.

Cathy had her main home in New York as well, not far from Rick, she also owned a home in the Hamptons but on the ocean side, clear across the way from Rick. She had a home in Arizona, as well as a ski resort in New Hampshire, so their vacation allowed them to get to know each other in multiple surroundings, each having home-field advantage traded off.

It had been a wonderful two months, away from the daily grind, and worries of life. Cathy was rich, filthy rich, but she lacked one thing money could buy, her only son's health. He had just been diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis, a disease in which the immune system eats away at the protective covering of nerves after finally seeing a doctor last month, just before the vacation had ended. Rick tried to console her, but how does anyone accept that news?

He had often complained of fatigue, but she associated that with the life of a young man 23, celebrating his degree from Oxford and as he put it, "trying to find himself in this world". Her ex-husband had called her, and asked if she could get him to see a doctor now that he was back in the states, he was deeply concerned about him. It was one of the few times each had spoken to the other, BUT when it came to their son Jay, they would walk through fire for him.

The call was initiated when Jay was staying with his Dad in Chicago, and celebrating with some lifelong buddies, and had been pulled over by Chicago PD, Jay wasn't driving, but had difficulty lifting his foot, and showed tremors in his limbs. The cop took the initiative and called his father, not for an infraction of the law, but a medical diagnosis.

After a battery of tests, he was diagnosed with MS or Multiple Sclerosis and the difficult call was made to his mother, now almost three years ago. It was a call she would never forget, Jay, her son was trying to be upbeat, and Carl, her ex-husband had opened his home, and invited her to come and visit Jay, now that he had the room converted to a medical room for his son.

Jay had decided to stay with his Dad since he knew his Mom was more of a jet setter than his father, the last thing he wanted to do was dash her chances with Rick. Carl had remarried less than a year after their divorce to his secretary, which painted the picture for Jay of the question he asked as a small boy, WHY? It was obvious WHY and to WHO. The remarkable thing was they were still married and seemed happy.

Cathy remembered each new symptom as they appeared, and there was a host, almost like they would never end. From constipation, depression, difficulty swallowing, difficulty thinking and understanding, flare, headache, heavy legs, numbness of the face, rapid involuntary eye movement, sleep deprivation, tongue numbness, weakness, or difficulty raising the foot or leg. With each one, Rick was there for her, her rock, she didn't know what she would have done without him, and now it was her turn to be there for him.

Jay had accepted his condition, and beyond all belief had found a woman who loved him for him. He had moved into his fiancé's apartment just a few months ago, with the blessing of both Carl and Cathy. Tina was his nurse, but from the start, there had been an attraction, she knew better than anyone what she was signing up for, and petitioned Carl and Cathy to please allow Jay to live with her, regardless of how long he had left.

Cathy knew it was love when Tina sent her a copy of the pre-nuptial agreement, she had insisted Jay agree to, not only one for Cathy but his dad as well. The girl wanted no one to think for one moment, she wanted nothing but to be with her husband because she loved him. Perhaps someday, that love would grow for her, but

PRESENT DAY

"Cathy, Cathy, are you OK?" Alexis quizzed, she must have zoned out thinking about the man who still was breathing steady as she held him gingerly, against her.

"Sorry Alexis, I guess I got caught up in memories, thoughts of what should, could, and ought to have been. We can't change our fate in life, but I often wonder what life would have been if we had made different life choices.

"This man, this beautiful man, has no idea how much he has captured my heart, he's owned it for years. I know, you wonder why either of us hasn't pursued anything deeper, well one reason for me was I know my heart, I want Rick to know his without a shadow of a doubt. He's had a lifetime of hurts, I don't want to add one once of pain to him" she smiled, as Alexis took her free hand,

"I think he knows Cathy, perhaps he's waiting until you're sure it's right, I don't know, hell, I'm barely more than a kid myself." She smiled,

Rick kept his eyes closed, his breathing steady, but he had heard every word. Now it was his call, well as soon as he dealt with Beckett and laid his mother to rest, it would be over soon.

A/N: Although I didn't publish a poll it's almost split evenly, Caskett and Cathy, good reasoning from both sides, and others just saying they want everyone happy together or not. I appreciate your feedback on this story, I guess I have to deal with TWO major questions before I choose a direction. FIRST, what guarantee did Rick have that Kate wouldn't be after the next new toy in the store, her promises of I only want you, had earned her the chance she stomped on as she made her way to DC. The second question I have to answer is WHAT does Kate offer that Cathy doesn't, and without nearly the baggage? I'll review the facts, and reviews, and tomorrow, if you have a strong opinion (NOT YOU CHARLIE) let me know I will have to decide, which path he will follow. Thanks for all of your reviews, and input even the crass ones that show the ignorance of people, for what reason I have no idea. - Tim