One Last Time

by Castlefan6

Authors Note: This is AU; Kate's mom is alive, still happily married to Jim.! The experiment of Kate and Rick living together, happily ever after is killed when she takes the Fed job only 7 months into their coupling. Only to return to New York 13 months later, BUT Rick isn't there.

I don't own Castle; I only use the characters for amusement purposes, except the ones I create.

Also, we take liberties with the timeline from Canon and use events to make this a more believable fiction, thanks. A different outcome from Watershed, at least for now. No Guarantee this will be Caskett Ending, but leaning that way now.

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Chapter 10

Ripepi, and Sons Funeral Home

Lexington and 8th Aves

Next Day 10:45 AM

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Rick was reviewing his notes for his mother's Eulogy, he was accustomed to speaking in public, but this was very different, very personal, and he realized that this WOULD be the final time to speak of his mother in this life. Everyone knows that death is a part of life, yet it's the one part that most try to avoid at all costs.

Cathy had brought him cold water, and his lozenges, for his throat, so he wouldn't lose his voice. She was right beside him as they greeted each visitor that signed the guest book and proceeded into the small chapel. They had greeted just about everyone from the 12th precinct, the names that were on the list, all but one prominent one, Beckett was still a no-show.

Cathy thought for a moment perhaps Beckett had a change of heart and had decided to forego the service, then she saw her walk through the front doors. "Rick, Kate just walked in, so be prepared sweetheart, plus it is 8 minutes until the service is due to start." She whispered in his ear as Kate was making her way to the guest book, stopping only to shake hands with Gina, Alexis, and Paula, and finally working her way up to Rick and Cathy.

"Detective, excuse me, Captain Beckett, thank you for coming, and congratulations on your recent promotion," Cathy said sweetly, as Rick said, "Beckett, meet Cathy Clad, Cathy this is as you have already correctly surmised the infamous Kate Beckett, now Captain of the 12th precinct, congratulations. He shook her hand, then before she could say another word,

"Please excuse me, they are waving to take our places so we can start on time, he held his arm out to Cathy and escorted her into the front row of the small chapel, leaving Beckett to sign the guest book and find a seat before the service began.

At exactly 11:00 AM a gentleman strode to the small podium, adjusted his glasses, and said "Good Morning, many of you don't know me, I'm Paul Wissler, newly elected president of AEA, or the Actors Equity Association, an organization that Miss Rogers was a member of for over 60 years. I knew Martha from several plays we worked together on years ago, neither of us landed lead parts, then her career skyrocketed, and I went to another part to support the Theater, (quiet laughter).

"Tonight, and for the next week, ALL lights on Broadway will dim for seven minutes, beginning at 9:00 PM in tribute to Miss Rogers, a star on and off the stage. She made everyone commit to a time limit and I'm almost at mine. I'd like to introduce her son, the ONLY thing she loved more than acting, well, besides her entire family and friends, so please if you're ready" he glanced at Rick, who nodded, "Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome Richard Castle to say a few words about his mother."

Rick rose, after Cathy squeezed his hand as if to say, you got this and made his way the short distance to the small podium. He cleared his voice, took a drink of water, and found his spot, one that appeared he was looking at the crowd of people when he was actually looking at a seam in the wallpaper that had a slight bulge in it.

"Good Morning,

"I'm Rick Castle, AKA Richard Rogers, and I was fortunate enough to be born to Martha Rogers, she was my mother, and in many ways my life. My mother chose to give birth to me during a time when it was not socially approved for single women to have children out of wedlock. The word Bastard child would reveal a side of Martha Rogers you really didn't want to see. She was very protective of me, and I of her, in many ways it was us against the world, especially in the early days when money was tight, and bills were high.

"If you are in this audience, then you meant much more to her than just an acquaintance, you were part of her family. Mother was private, I know that raises some eyebrows, who could wear the clothes she did, and want to remain private? She told me once, "Kiddo, never argue with them, you'll never win. Give them something else just as big as they want to dig into and let them chase that." That to mother was her fashion, or in some minds, friends included, lack of" he smiled for a moment.

"Mother often worked three plays simultaneously when I was a child just to insure, she would have the money for me, for my doctors, and finally for my piano lessons. She insisted, and I'm surprised she hasn't put a billboard up on Lexington Ave. with my concert photos playing piano at various ages, just to embarrass me." He paused and smiled, I can say this now, as usual, Mother was right, later in life, it allowed me to be a stay-at-home Dad, writing at night between sets when I played five nights a week at a club, The Old Haunt, which I now own.

"Mother knew, and would always tell me don't put all your dreams in one basket son, reach for the stars. Perhaps it wasn't such a surprise or a stretch that when she became a life coach, she listed me as her first client, and she was right, she had guided me my entire life until the sickness slowed her. Now I must think about what she would want me to do, something I never had to do as long as she was lucid, I ALWAYS knew what she wanted me to do," again quiet laughter from the small crowd,

"Those of you who knew Mother on a personal level, understand when I say, she had a love that would engulf you, no matter who you were. Mother became the staunchest supporter of my ex-wife, Gina, perhaps the reason that she has taken her death so hard.

"Gina told me once, that she was the only woman that ever treated her as a daughter, a direct reflection of Mother's words about her daughter by another mother. When arguments ensued, you can guess whose fault it was according to Mother" He paused and listened to the quiet laughter for a few moments, Gina dabbed her eyes, crying through her smile. She could remember so many times, Martha taking up for her, Rick was correct.

"Just after Mom passed, Gina called and joked it was a good thing her fiancé Tom didn't need to get permission for time off from work for the service today. I asked stupidly, why is that, Gina? She replied, imagine hearing that you need time off of work to attend the funeral of your fiancé's ex-mother-in-law, now that's a Hallmark Card you're never going to see." He paused as more laughter, and Tom and Gina both smiling, Gina still dabbing her eyes.

"Then she paid Mother the ultimate compliment, when she said, Rick, you and I got divorced, I never agreed to leave Martha or Alexis behind, so live with that. Proof that Mother truly loved her, and that love was returned, the love was real, it never died, not for Gina, not for anyone who spent time in our home, whether for just a few days or a few months, it didn't matter to mother.

"It didn't stop there, my soulmate and partner, Cathy Clad was next on her list, and once again, she made Cathy feel as if she were home, that everything was going to be OK, just because she said so. We missed those days as the disease began to take more and more of her lucid moments from her, but on occasion, she would surprise you with her wit, even as sick as she was. One of those moments happened the day before she died.

"The Nursing Facility had arranged an all-day showing of all the works Mother had been in, some TV shows, some commercials, and some taped full plays. My family watched as Mother repeated lines she had said over 50 years ago without missing a beat, thinking how cruel it was that she wouldn't be able to remember even one of us, just for a few seconds, in a few hours.

"Her granddaughter, Alexis, was her joy and purpose in life, and she loved her more than most grandmothers could. Alexis sat with her even on days when she thought she was just a lady from housekeeping, or there to read a story to her, just waiting for that breakout day when her Grams reemerged from the darkness of the illness.

"Her Grams had and will always be a force in her life, and I can see traits of Mother in her today. She equipped her emotionally for a tough world, much better than a Dad who had to read books, remember there was no YouTube then, on how to make bottles, change diapers, and everything that came with raising a child.

"Mother once said the song My Way was written for and about her, and as her son, I can tell you she was pretty close. (more soft laughter) Mother, you did things your way, you lived your life to the fullest, and when it is my time to go, I hope someone can say, the same about me. Your saying, Life's short kiddo, how much money do you really need, have some fun" I'm sorry you never understood when I told you that I've taken that advice and that it took me so long to realize what's important in life, once again you were right

"I know I have a time limit, so I will close by saying, we lost more than an award-winning actress, the world shares our loss for that. Alexis lost her Grams, Gina and Cathy their surrogate mothers, and I have lost my anchor, the one who would have fake book reviews printed up to keep my ego in check, out of love, nothing else.

"Mom, it's your time now to dance with the angels now, save a spot for us for when we get there, I hardly ever said it, but I KNOW you knew it, I love you, Mother," his voice cracked on the word love. He walked the short distance to his seat, Cathy was already halfway to him and wrapped her arm around him as they sat.

Father Anthony of St. Johns led a short prayer and then a few words, then turned the podium over to Tony Ripepi. "On behalf of the Rogers/Castle families, we thank each of you for paying your respects to a legend. I want to take just a moment to add my thoughts. I remember the first time we saw her, I was in the cheap seats with my girlfriend, well now wife, who wanted to attend the play.

"At intermission, she saw us and I guess she overheard our conversation and the disappointment with our seats. She invited us backstage, spent time with us, and then sent us box seats Front, Center for the next year. She was a friend for the rest of her life. I mention this to prove what Rick said earlier, her love engulfed you.

"The family will attend the PRIVATE internment, then request everyone return to dinner at LeCerque in her honor, beginning at 2:30 PM. May we have those who wish to view the casket, please make your final trip now, so the family will be the last to say goodbye, and leave for the private location, thank you.

Almost everyone filed by quickly, some made the sign of the cross, and others just looked heavenly for a moment, until the small chapel only contained just the immediate family, Gina, Tom, and Paula. They followed slowly as Martha took her final ride to the family mausoleum in an undisclosed location.

Rick's security forces made sure they were not followed. Mike wouldn't say but it only took a few smashed scooters, and cars tuned over for the paparazzi to get the message, a few words spoken by Father McNair from St. Johns, and the service was over, as Martha was at her new home, her final resting place.

XxX

Kate wasn't surprised by the greeting she received, after all, she couldn't expect him to delay the service just because she arrived so close to the start time. "It's a tough time for all of us Kate, you, OK?" Roz asked when she realized she was standing with both Anne and Roz.

"Yeah, Roz, thanks, it was tough to realize that she's gone, I mean she was always so full of life," Kate replied,

"I know, it hurt to see her as she was in the home, I didn't go back, it may be the coward in me, but I wanted to remember the vibrant lady who could pick up more young guys than me at the parties" Anne laughed,

"It wasn't the coward way, Anne, we all have to deal in our own way," Kate said softly, it was approaching 1:50 PM, "Hey you want to head to the restaurant, it's getting close to the time" she added,

"I rode with Roz, so we'll meet you there Kate," Anne said softly, and they turned away walking to Roz's car. It wasn't as icy a response as she had expected, perhaps it was the situation, Kate thought as she made her way to her car and the restaurant. The first surprise was there were place cards, on each table, no surprise where Kate was, in the back with three of Martha's stage friends, and Paula.

"Sorry Kate, but it was a zoo trying to get everyone in here placed, I would have had you with the 12th, but there wasn't room when those who came after their shift for the dinner only." Paula sounded sincere,

"No Problem, Paula, it doesn't matter where I sit," she said softly, she noticed there was a large presence of the 12th at the restaurant, many had worked the graveyard shift, and had gotten up after just a few hours of sleep to pay their respect to Rick. He had opened up the dinner to allow them to attend, even though Martha had limited the guests at the funeral.

At 2:30 PM, Rick rose and tapped on his glass to get the attention of the room, as silence fell quickly.

"First, thank you all for coming, some to both the service at Ripepi and now this dinner. This was meant to CELEBRATE the life of Martha Rogers, not mourn, and believe me, you don't want an upset Martha Rogers, regardless of what plane she is calling home now. Mother, this first one is for you, just to show you all the years I made fun of your fu-fu drinks, I still loved you. The bartenders have renamed your drink to Hurricane Martha, they doubled the booze," everyone started laughing,

"Would you please lift your glasses and toast the one, the only Martha Rogers one last time, Mother till we get there, we salute you," Rick downed the drink as did many others. Kate toasted with water, she needed to be sober if Rick would talk to her. She wasn't a fool and could see as well as anyone else, the chance of her ever getting another chance was less than winning the Powerball Lottery.

Dinner was pleasant as stories about Martha were shared, Paula even shared that she was seeing someone steady, and was the most cordial Kate ever remembered her to be. She asked how the move back had gone, and how she was enjoying the new position, all very kind and respectful.

Around 4:00 things started to wind down, and most of the people were leaving to get home to their families, once again, Rick, Cathy, Gina, and her fiancé along with Alexis stood in line thanking the people for coming. When she made it to him, she expected a short answer just by his body motions.

"Rick is there a chance we could talk, I mean"

"Meet you at the swings in one hour, Beckett," he said as he was already shaking the next guest's hand.

The swings, of course, had to be those fucking swings, the place she blew his love to bits, and now, well he was calling the shots she thought. If she wanted to talk to him, well she would have to do it on his terms,

Cathy had seen and overheard her ask, "Are you, OK sweetheart?" She asked taking his hand,

"Yes, no, Well I will be soon. I have to face her again Cathy, and I know what she is going to ask. You know me well, you know how hard it is for me to hurt anyone, regardless of our history." Rick said,

"Well, take it from a woman, she knows what you're going to say, she's known for three years. That's the real reason she didn't contact you. As long as it wasn't over for good, in her mind, she still had a chance. Now she knows exactly what's coming, you made it clear that I was part of the family, at least in Martha's eyes." She smiled,

"I didn't embarrass you did I love?" he asked suddenly panicking,

"Of course not, it was a great compliment, Rick, I knew Martha loved me, and now I know her son does as well. I know you will be as kind as possible, and I also know that the time we spent together built the strength between us, that it would take a hell of a lot to tear it apart. Do you know how nice it is to feel that way after so many years of doubt?" She kissed him gently,

"I'm sorry Cathy, I never meant to take this long, and God, thank you for hanging in there with me. I'll be back as soon as I can, BUT I will let her have enough time to get EVERYTHING out and clear, I don't want to do this again."

"Just be kind Rick, I know, I know, she hurt you, sweetheart, you are bigger than that, OK? For me?"

"Damn you know exactly what to say, don't you, and OK, for you."

TBC

A/N: One final chapter, the confrontation between Rick and Kate at the Swings, had to be the swings to get the full impact, Once again, thanks for the reviews and support, even if you didn't like the direction it went. Thank you for reading, and reviewing, - Tim