"Oh oh, oh oh woah, oh oh woah

It was a suicide saturday

Oh oh, oh oh woah, oh oh woah

In a summertime kind of way"

- Suicide Saturday by Hippo Campus

September 19, 1979

This is a tale about how a girl with major daddy issues found herself with that same dad as her brother.

…It's a long story, to say the least.

But before any of that could happen, this girl had to grow up – the first time. She was born on September 19, 1979, during a rare summer thunderstorm, inside a small muggle hospital, with no other family but her mother. One of the nurses thought it fun to comment on how rain brings good fortune for a baby's life (spoiler alert: she was horribly wrong).

The birth was easy, almost like the baby was fighting to be free. The mother rushed the paperwork and after making sure the baby was healthy, she high-tailed it out of there. You see, the baby was conceived out of wedlock, with a man known only by his first name. Back then, and even in modern days, one-night stands were heavily frowned upon, so the mother was determined to rid her reputation of this mistake as quickly as possible.

The mother didn't even name the girl before she dropped her off at the pub where she met the father. The most she did was have the decency to leave a note with the bartender, Alan:

Dear Regulus,

She is yours'. I can't take her. I know you come from money, so I hope you can give her a good life. She doesn't have a name. Please care for her the best you can.

Elizabeth

It would be two days before the bartender was able to contact her father. Miraculously, the bartender was what is known as a squib: a magicless wizard, so he knew of the Black family (who didn't?) and could hopefully get a message to the young heir. Anyone who has heard of Regulus' story knows that he was a bit busy, and therefore he can be cut some slack for his absence.

While Astrea was recovering with Alan from her tiring journey into the world, her father, Regulus Arcturus Black, was on a mission to retrieve Voldemort's horcrux.

For many years afterward, people would say that Regulus died on that mission, but that is a lie.

In reality, he survived.

September 19, 1979

Unknown cave

2 hours before birth

After seeing what the Dark Lord had done with Kreacher on his mission, it didn't take long for Regulus to make his final decision on what side he'd rather be on. For months, he had been unsure about what he was really intending to accomplish as a Death Eater, but this betrayal pushed him over the edge.

As evidenced by beloved his house elve's state, he knew that there was going to be powerful wards, but he also knew that Kreacher could get past them. He had done it before, and only failed once he was forced to drink the water.

He felt horrible asking the house elf to venture into that cave again, but he knew it was for the greater good, and he wasn't planning on putting Kreacher in any unnecessary danger.

"I know I can just order you to do it, but I don't want this to be done out of duty. I want you to choose, Kreacher," he said.

Almost immediately, the house elf responded, a determined glint in his eye, "Kreacher will always assist Young Master Regulus."

Not long after, Kreacher apparated them as far as the shore (since humans were held back by anti-apparting wards), where Regulus was forced to transfigure a nearby log into a boat for them to reach the cave. An angry storm was kicking up white-caps, almost as if the universe was telling them that this was a bad idea.

Well no shite, universe, I'm about to defy one of the most powerful wizards to exist. Of fucking course it's stupid, Regulus thought.

But you have to be a little bit mad to be in the Black family anyways.

He felt very muggle while rowing, but he didn't have long to ponder his conflicting emotions on that matter before they reached the cave entrance. Per Kreacher's instructions, Regulus sliced his hand open with a knife provided by the elf, and soon enough, he was standing on an island surrounded by inferi-infested waters.

He had ordered Kreacher to remain at the entrance for his safety. The house elf had done enough already.

Steeling himself, Regulus clutched the copy locket in hand and started drinking. It had a horrid flavor, and he felt the effects almost instantly. He was thirsty with a capital 'T.' Even when he finally reached the end and deposited the fake heirloom, the effects didn't stop; he had almost immediately collapsed and was holding onto the real locket with shaking hands.

"Kreacher! Come here!" he managed to gasp out.

With a pop, Kreacher materialized in front of him with what only Regulus could see as a worried expression.

"What does the Young Master require?" he asked.

Regulus gasped, desperately to resist the temptation to climb into the infested waters, "Take the locket. Hide it where no wizard will ever find it. Promise me, Kreacher."

"I promise, Young Master Regulus," Kreacher vowed, and then he took the locket from his master's hands and popped back into Grimmauld Place, where he placed the locket in his personal stash of items.

It was against all unspoken rules, but Kreacher had been hiding away all sorts of forgotten trinkets since he was put under the charge of the Blacks. None of the self-obsorbed wizards had found it yet, and he knew they wouldn't ever.

Back in the cave, Regulus had given into his urges. He knew going into this mission that he would probably not make it out, which is why he had written the note. Now he could die knowing that he proved everyone wrong. He defied expectations, including his brother's. Especially his brother's.

Crawling towards the water, he started to feel pangs in his core, but they were distant thoughts overpowered by his thirst. In a sane state, he would have immediately known what they meant, but he was not in a sane sort of mind.

Right as he reached the water's edge, he felt a tug in his magical core. This finally got his attention, but by then it was too late. His arm had already been grasped by an inferi, and he was already half-way into the water before his mind cleared enough for him to realize what all those pangs were.

A familial bond.

But not just any bond. It was a bond between a parent and a child.

But that was impossible.

But he had been spending his time with various people to forget the horrible things he had done for the Dark Lord… and oh yeah, now he was drowning.

How can someone be dying and having an existential crisis at the same time? Only Regulus Black.

He felt more hands dragging him down…down…down to the deep depths of whatever the hell this lake was called. Then there was a bright orange light.

Huh. I thought it was supposed to be white. Whatever, Regulus thought.

Then he realized that he wasn't dying and the orange light was fire and it was coming from Kreacher's hands and the inferi were letting him go and he was being tugged out of the water by an invisible force that he distantly recognized as an accio charm. And then he was gasping actual air and spitting out water and he was alive.

And he had to face whatever the hell that bond he felt meant. Wonderful.

"Young master Regulus! Young master Regulus! Are you alright?" Kreacher's voice started to fade into existence in his mind.

"I'm fine, Kreacher," he said.

Fine is relative.

"We must get out of here soon, young master Regulus! This place is not safe!" Kreacher urged, gently tugging on Regulus' arm.

In normal circumstances, Kreacher would never dare to be so forward with a master, but he knew that it was for young master Regulus' wellbeing. He was the only Black who had ever been kind to him, so he made it his personal mission to protect him. At all costs.

"Ok, Kreacher. Can you apparate us out of here? I have something I need to check at home," Regulus said.

"Of course, young master Regulus."

With a pop, Regulus was lying in the grand entrance hall to Grimmauld Place. If his mother weren't visiting the Malfoys, she would be having a fit over him tracking mud all over her Persian rugs (he didn't have the mental strength to tell her that they were muggle. Plus, he felt like he could almost hear Sirius laughing over it with him after they had snuck out into muggle London one night).

"Did you feel it?" He asked Kreacher as he pushed himself to his feet.

Reaching into his robe pocket, he pulled out a vial of Pepper-up Potion and downed the whole thing in one go. Thank you, Past Regulus, he thought. He was always prepared for every circumstance, even if he was on what he'd thought was a suicide mission.

Momentarily rejuvinated, he started walking to what he and Sirius had dubbed "the tree room" as small children. The tree tapestry contained every witch or wizard of Black blood. It was charmed many years ago, and he knew that the only way to be certain was this.

"Feel what, young master Regulus?" Kreacher had finally caught up to him.

"The bond, Kreacher! Isn't it obvious?" Regulus exclaimed, eyes frantically searching the wall. House elves were connected to the family bloodline, so he would have felt the connection, too.

He found his leaf and instantly his mind went blank. He could practically hear Kreacher going through his mental list of Black relatives, and then come to the same conclusion he had moments ago.

Regulus had a daughter.

"Fuck."

Regulus prided himself on his lack of fainting.

There was a small baby girl on a flower attached to his leaf. There was no name, and there was only the birthdate, but it was glaringly obvious that he had a daughter.

Sadly, his first thought was wondering if this put him above Sirius and 'dromeda on the Black family-fuck-up list. Children out of wedlock seemed like a good boost to him.

Finally, Kreacher's voice broke him out of his stupor. "YOUNG MASTER REGULUS! PLEASE TELL KREACHER WHAT IS GOING ON."

Right.

He had to explain himself now.

"I- I made a mistake. This isn't a trick, Kreacher," he whispered with wide eyes, continuing, "I have a daughter."

After Regulus' announcement, Kreacher began looking like it was HIS turn to faint. It's understandable, with how much shite the poor creature had to put up with due to his connection to the Black family.

"I beg your pardon, yound master Regulus? You have a what?!" he screeched.

"A daughter. She was born just tonight. Can you feel your connection to her?" Regulus responded, sitting up now.

With a deep breath, Kreacher seemed to steel himself to deal with this absolute crapshow, right before his promptly slapped Regulus across the cheek. The heir rocked back, more from the shock than the sting.

"What was that for?!" he exclaimed.

"The young master deserves much worse than that for what he has done! Having a child out of wedlock! This is a stain on the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black!" Kreacher yelled.

Regulus imagined steam coming from his ears as he stood up, preparing to end this argument before it ever really got started.

"As the heir to said house, I control you. That means that you WILL listen to what I have to say, got it?" he shot a glare at the elf.

With a dramatic sniff, Kreacher nodded, bowing his head slightly afterwards to reaffirm his respect.

In the span of what was probably three seconds, Regulus made a decision that would definitly change his life forever. And that's coming from the same wizard who defied the Dark Lord not thirty minutes ago!

He spoke, "Now, I will not leave this child alone with no father, but under no circumstances am I raising it in his abhorrent place. You will find her through your connection and you will bring her here while I prepare for our journey. Am I clear?"

If it were possible, Kreacher appeared like he was about to cry. But Regulus knew better. Even if he did have a strong connection to the house elf, he wasn't unaware of his little friend's ability to be a nasty twat. Where his parents egged on the behavior, Regulus refused to allow that disrespect to linger around him.

With a near-hidden sigh, Kreacher bowed his head and said, "Yes, young master Regulus. I will leave at once."

The chapters will get longer as they go on dw. This story has been floating around in my head for A WHILE, and I'm so glad to finally be able to share it! Here is some basic info for the start:

- Hermione = Astrea Black = half-blood
- Regulus obviously didn't die
- The world doesn't deserve Astrea Black
- NO SMUT but some mentions to it and some heated make-outs later on
- I'm American, so some things I might get wrong. If it bothers you, write a polite comment and I'll see what I can do :)

This is a safe space for LGBTQ+. Homophobes WILL be reported.

I have no idea what my plan is for updates yet, so we're just winging it for now, k?

I hope you enjoy,

cam