There I was

by Michael Redgar

This story is a "what if" story and pretty much a "Mary Sue". I suspect most Star Trek fans have had thoughts about "What if I was on the Enterprise?" I tried to come up with how I might really feel, what I would want to do in that situation., and how the crew might react. This was fun to write. I hope you find it fun to read.

There I was..

by Michael Halbrook

Chapter 1

There I was…

I opened my eyes and there was a face somewhat out of focus looking down at me. The face came a bit closer and resolved itself into that of a youngish woman with black hair and eyes.

I heard "Doctor he is awake."

"On my way." was the reply.

The voices sounded familiar. I looked around. Even with things out of focus, I recognized my surroundings. I thought to myself "Am I dreaming? Somehow it doesn't feel like it. I don't remember ever being nearsighted in a dream." Then I realized I was naked under a thin sheet. This was no clue at all, I'd been naked in many dreams. I was pretty sure I was in Sick Bay on the USS Enterprise "D". I'd been on this ship many times as part of the extensive directed dreaming I had done about 20 years ago. Successful directed dreaming had involved a combination of mediation followed by a "lucid" dream state. I had done neither before going to sleep this time.

Another person approached, as they became somewhat clearer they spoke.

"I am Doctor Beverly Crusher Chief Medical Officer of the USS Enterprise. Who are you, my friend, and where did you from?"

"I am Michael Halbrook."

Though she looked quite blurry, I thought I saw Dr Crusher's eyes widen briefly then return to normal.

"How did I get here?" I asked.

"I thought you would tell me. You showed up on this bio bed naked, warm, but with no active vital signs."

"You mean I was dead?"

"You would have died if we had not intervened. We started your heart and all your vital signs quickly returned to normal. There are no signs of even the slight brain damage that would have occurred if your brain had been any time without oxygen."

This was all going a direction I seemed to have no control over. None the less I did not want the dream to end, as I had been unable to effectively to do directed dreaming for a long time; too much of the weight of the real world, I guess.

"Doctor I'm quite near sighted, could you arrange for some corrective lenses and perhaps some clothes for me?"

"Nurse Ogawa, bring Mr Halbrook some clothes and ask Dr Selar to join us."

"Dr Selar will be able to replicate some lenses to correct your vision."

"As for where I came from, I went to sleep last night in the year 2022 in the Western part of the USA. There is a USS Enterprise, but it is a nuclear powered aircraft carrier, out of service and awaiting scrapping. This is clearly not that ship."

"This is the United Federation of Planets Starship USS Enterprise NCC-1701D. We are quite some distance from Earth."

Two figures came into view, one carrying a package, the other taller, the second one I could tell was a Vulcan when they came closer. Nurse Ogawa placed a package on the bio bed. The Vulcan was carrying a small box with several blinking lights.

"I am Dr Selar. I will be able to provide your vision correction momentarily."

The lights blinked on the box and Dr Selar went over to a panel on the wall. The Vulcan returned with a small frame with two ear loops. It looked like a pair of glasses with no lenses or lens holders.

"Put this on, Mr Halbrook."

I pulled the frame around my ears and the world came in focus. The package on the bio bed was clothes.

"How does it open?"

Dr Crusher touched the edge of the package and it fell away. I pulled out a rather ordinary looking set of underwear, pants, shirt and shoes.

Dr Crusher motioned the others and they looked away as I stood up and tried to get dressed.

I took a brief moment to look at myself. What I could see looked about right, my scars and other minor imperfections all seemed to be in the right places.

The details of the clothes were completely unfamiliar. After some fumbling I said.

"I don't know how any of this works. Can I have some help?"

Dr Crusher came over. "There are touch pads at the top and bottom of each garment. Run your finger down to open and up to close." She quickly demonstrated how they worked.

I quickly pulled on all the clothes. I looked around and suddenly a feeling of unreality swept over me. The clothes felt strange, the smell of the air was different, even the pressure of my feet on the deck was somehow wrong. I felt light headed and slumped back on to the bio bed.

Chapter 2

Dr Crusher was quickly by my side a look of concern on her face..

"What's wrong, Mike?"

She put me on my back on the bio bed and elevated my feet. I heard noises from what I knew was a medical tricorder.

"You are showing symptoms of mild shock. You were fine when you woke up."

"This seems so real, not wishful thinking, not a dream. Doctor, it will take me time to come to terms with all this."

I heard a slight hiss and there was a cold feeling in my left shoulder.

"I given you a slight tranquilizer. Why don't you tell me more about yourself."

"I've been retired for several years. I rode motorcycles and I've flown both real and model aircraft. I've been to sea. I had number of other hobbies as well. Doctor, I'm beginning to think my family, friends, everyone and everything I knew and cared about may be gone forever."

"If we can determine how you came to be here that may not be true. For now, don't you have questions about the 24th century?"

"Yes. Where is the bathroom, and how does it work?"

"Do you need to go right now?"

"No, it was just the first thing that popped into my head."

Dr Crusher touched something and the upper section of the bio bed raised up and a screen came out of the side of the bed and positioned itself at a good viewing distance in front of my eyes. A video began to play.

"Welcome aboard the USS Enterprise. This guide will show you what areas of the ship are available to you as a guest, what are available with escort by a member of the crew, and what are restricted. To the left of the screen there is a menu of instructions for using the services of your quarters and the public areas of the ship."

Chapter 3

I spent that first full day in sickbay. By the end of the day I could walk around sickbay without getting wobbly. I spent several more days there. People came and went over the course of the time that I was there. They would glance at me but did not approach. Each morning I opened my eyes with surprise that I was still on the Enterprise.

Dr Crusher followed my progress closely.

"Do think you can dress yourself, feed yourself, and otherwise function well enough to leave sickbay?"

I came to a decision.

"Yes, Doctor. It is important I have a meeting with Captain Picard as soon as practical. There should be as few people as possible in the meeting."

Dr Crusher started to say something, then stopped for a moment.

"I'll send in the request in for you now."

"Thank you Doctor."

She walked back to her office without another word.

I met with Captain Picard near the end of the same day. Mr Worf and Mr Data were the only others present.

"Mr Halbrook, I intended to meet with you soon. What is so important you need to see me now?"

"Captain Picard, I have come here directly from the year 2022. But it is not your 2022. Where I am from this is all fiction, a series of television dramas extending over more than forty years that start with the Enterprise under Captain Pike, then under Captain Kirk and then the Enterprise D under your command. In this fashion I have seen many of your missions, your battles, and much of your personal lives from a third person perspective. Some of what I have seen may answer some remaining questions, some of it may be restricted information here and some of what I have seen may not have occurred here yet. I don't know why or how I got here. I suspect I am dead in 2022. I feel quite real and I have to believe I am real to able to continue at all. I don't expect you to believe this, it would be a difficult thing for anyone to accept. If I was in your position I would probably think I was just another of Q's puerile jokes."

The Captain looked at me for a moment after my words.

"Mr Worf, escort 'Mr Halbrook' to the brig!"

Chapter 4

Mr Worf said nothing to me and I said nothing in reply. We went past several areas in the ship I was sure I had never seen before. We reached the brig and he motioned me to enter one of the cells. I did so and turned to face him. The force field came on. Mr Worf looked back at me as he left. I acknowledged him with a brief nod. He left without a word.

Everything in the brig was gray. I was surprised that the food replicator would make anything I requested, as had the one in sickbay. I thought about touching the force field that made up the fourth wall, but decided that was a bad idea. After a time I slapped the flat of my hand against one of the other walls as hard as I could. It hurt like hell and the flat of my hand turned quite red. The throbbing of my hand continued to remind me that I had to accept all of this as real. I lay on the bunk as my hand continued to throb in pain. It then occurred to me, the clothes, the restrooms, and areas of the ship that were unfamiliar. These were all things I had never seen on the television show. The way the clothes worked and the restrooms were unfamiliar for obvious reasons, the areas of the ship were due its sheer size.

I woke up out of a ridiculous dream about being an aardvark. It was another day on the Enterprise. I had breakfast, brushed my teeth and did to the other things needed to start a new day.

Late in the day Captain Picard came in. Guinan was with him. I felt fear; Guinan might be the only one that could answer the question. The question of whether I was real, or merely an obnoxious alien's joke.

Guinan said, "Have them turn off the force field."

Captain Picard nodded to the security officer and the fourth wall dropped.

"Give me your hand." Guinan reached out to me and she took my hand.

After a moment she said, "I believe him to be who he claims to be."

I let out a breath I didn't know I had been holding.

Captain Picard touched his communicator. "Mr Worf, arrange quarters for Mr Halbrook."

"Yes, Captain."

"Mr Halbrook, why don't you join us in Ten Forward?"

"I would be honored to join you."

Chapter 5

Something that had not improved in the last three hundred years were alcohol substitutes. Sythahol was ghastly. After a brief taste I asked to try something else. There was something like Coca Cola that would have passed as real with flying colors anywhere. The Captain apologized for my brief incarceration; I told him I would have had to make the same choice in his position. I asked Guinan if she had been on Earth in the 20th century; she replied she had, but returned home in the 1980s at the insistence of her father. She had not been an actress or comic.

The Captain and I got into an extended conversation about propeller driven aircraft, both real ones and flying models. Guinan shared some of her experiences flying in 20th century airliners. Then at the same time we all realized we were hungry. We shared a meal and after that Captain Picard indicated that duty calls.

I got up to leave and realized I had no idea where my quarters were. I looked around and then noticed Mr Worf approaching me.

"Mr Halbrook, I will show to you quarters."

We left 10 Forward and we only went a brief distance along the passageway when Mr Worf opened a door.

My quarters were spacious, but without external windows.

"You have access to all of the unrestricted areas of the ship. Dr Crusher informed me you have viewed the visitors guide for the ship. Contact me if you wish to visit an area that requires an escort and I will schedule someone as a guide. Do you have any questions at this time?'

"No, Mr Worf, thank you for you assistance."

He left without another word.

The next few days were a period of extended "debriefs" with Mr Data. At the first meeting he remarked, "I am not sure how to interact with someone that believes I am fictional."

"Mr Data, I have to accept this is real, regardless of my past. You have a slight advantage over the other people here; you know you were created by a human being. This is just a variation on your current knowledge."

We spent many days going over what I knew, repeating areas where my memory was a bit vague. Then one day Mr Data came in and looked at me and said, "You look fatigued. We should take a break for a few days."

It was then I realized how tiring and stressful the debriefing was. I slept in the next day, then toured the arboretum and took in a live concert in the evening. I had dinner in Ten Forward and then Guinan joined me for awhile.

I asked, "What was the first airliner you flew in?"

"A DC-3. It was the first one that seemed safe enough that the speed advantage over a train was worthwhile."

"I was shown the cockpit of a Ozark Airlines DC-3 by the pilots when I was a small child. The first flight I had on an airliner was going to Navy Boot Camp about 15 years later."

"Have you been to a holodeck yet? It can run many aircraft simulations." A pause. "Many other things as well. I think it would help you to visit one soon, tomorrow if possible. I need to get back to the bar. See you soon."

There was some kind of hint in this suggestion, but I decided not to ask further.

Chapter 6

I stood outside the holodeck.

"Computer, the location is two kilometers south of Half Moon Bay California, it is night time in the summer of 1985. It is pleasantly warm. There are no clouds , no breeze, and no moon. The stars are bright."

"Such a program already exists, do you want to run the existing program , or a have new program generated."

A shiver went though my body.

"Computer what is the name of the program?"

"Crusher 17"

I was light headed for a moment, and I thought to myself "Am I really here?"

"Computer, run program Crusher 17"

As I approached the door to the holodeck opened. I entered and waited for my eyes to adjust. It was a beautiful night as it had been that long ago night in 1985. I walked down to the beach and listened to the waves. I had a feeling I would be joined soon.

After a time I heard the door cycle. The sound of the waves covered any other noises.

"I brought a blanket. May join you?"

"You knew. Why didn't you say anything Beverley?"

"Of course I knew it was you. I've seen you naked before, you know. I was waiting for you to say something to indicate we had been in a shared long term repeating dream. Deanna knew about it, as does the Captain. I told Guinan as well before she came to see you in the brig. Deanna thought it would be up to me to make the first move, but why didn't you say anything, Mike?"

"A stranger that shows up and seems to know everything about you would tend to make most people very uncomfortable. My stay in the brig also lead me to think you did not know who I was."

"It is hard to accept that we might be someone's 'entertainment' somewhere else. Also the one time you mentioned a date in our prior meetings it was in the mid 1990s, in sickbay you said you came from 2022, but you look, and act, as if you were no older than at our last shared dream."

I realized with shock she was right. I had looked in a mirror numerous times since I arrived and accepted my appearance as normal, though now realized I looked and felt much younger than my age in the world that was now lost.

"We had a meeting to discuss what to do about you. Data suggested I should compare your body scans to those of some 20th Century people we had rescued several years ago. When I compared them to your scans I could see similar traces of pollutants typical of the late 20th and early 21st Centuries in all of your scans. Nasty stuff, lead, benzene, microplastics and other industrial trash. Also it took longer than it should have to realize Guinan should be able to detect one of Q's jokes."

She paused, then said with a low chuckle, "And you never had trouble putting on your clothes before."

Another pause.

"Do I need to tell you why I brought a blanket?"

I fumbled around some in the dark with my clothes but got them off by myself.

Chapter 7

After a time we lay side by side in the dark as I tried to catch my breath. I thought back to the times we were together during my sessions of "directed dreaming".

"You seemed to know a lot about me when we dreamed together, things I don't remember telling you".

"Wesley told me about you at first. The stories sounded interesting so I read them myself."

"Stories? What stories?"

"You were the hero of a number of young adult adventure stories in the late 20th and early 21st century. They were written by a popular young adult and children's author Doctor of Pediatrics Alan Smith . They were of an archaic format based on the 'Tom Swift' stories from the early 20th century. 'Mike Halbrook goes to Sea', 'Mike Halbrook and the Giant Arc Light', a great number of them. They had been rediscovered about 15 years ago and were quite popular for awhile. You didn't really come home to four thunderbolts, did you? And what about pushing a button and thinking you were ?"

I interrupted, "Yes I did that, and I went to sea, and I suspect much of the rest of life my is fiction here as well."

Another thought came to mind.

"I expect having someone out of a set of children's stories telling the Captain he was fiction did not go over well."

"He thought it was pretty damn arrogant. Then that line about being one of Q's jokes was the last straw. He said it was as if you were daring him to put you in the brig."

There was a pause, then Dr Crusher asked.

"What was she like? …. Never mind, I don't think I want know."

I knew who she meant, and I kept silent.

"I haven't seen Wesley. Is he onboard?"

Another chuckle.

"Yes, and he has lots of questions for you about your adventures. We asked him to wait; it might have made you uncomfortable having a stranger know everything about you."

"Well, my answers probably won't be as 'entertaining' as the work of Dr Smith. I understand a little now of how you felt about being told you were all fiction; now I have to wrap my head around it as well."

"You talk just like that in your…. Sorry about that."

Chapter 8

My debriefings with Mr Data resumed. He had considerably more skill as an interviewer (or interrogator) than I had expected. One morning the door chimed and I gave my usual reply "enter". Counselor Troi walked in.

"Counselor, I was expecting Mr Data. What can I do for you?"

"Data told me that at times you would stop talking and look at nothing. Sometimes it took some time to get your attention after this. He has been doing research on human behavior and suspected this was 'melancholy'. He wanted to confirm his hypothesis with me, and I thought I should talk to you."

"It must be obvious if Mr Data noticed it. There is an old phrase 'Be careful what you wish for, you may get it.' I accomplished many unlikely things in my old life, but none at such a cost as this. I feel at times like I have abandoned everyone and everything that was important to me. Now I'm not sure I would go back even if I could."

"You were not given a choice; you were just here. Michael, I think you understand that at an intellectual level. Do you think your family and friends would want you to be unhappy here?"

"No, I suppose not. Tell Mr Data that the periods of melancholy will continue but decrease as time passes. Counselor, do others suspect that there is something between Dr Crusher and myself?"

"I think people are happy for the both of you. Even Data is aware the two of you are a couple."

Chapter 9

The debriefings were over. Mr Data did some historical research and found two possible points of divergence for our timelines, a B-17 crew that was lost with all hands during WWII, and an election in the 1960s that led to a different outcome for the NASA moon program.

I received an invitation to share quarters from Dr Crusher; I accepted. I was able to start playing music again, something I had had to give up in the "real world", though the world I was in seemed more like the real world the longer I was here.

I had talked to Wesley a few times, but I was finally at a point I could sit down and answer his questions.

"Mr Halbrook I'm"

"Call me Mike, please."

"Mike, tell me about the P-40!"

"There I was; we had just advanced the throttle for the overhead 360 when the engine blew up."

The End