II

this is part 2 of this short story. I feel like I wanted to write something loving and caring between Amelia and Charlotte and this explanation for Cooper belongs in this story as part of that.

Later that night, Charlotte came home to Cooper, who saved some of the dinner for her. He had asked what took her so long, and she simply said she talked for a while with Amelia. Cooper had nodded, happy for his wife that she talked with Amelia, but also sad that he was not the one she was talking to. He decided to put away that feeling and be genuinely happy for her.

They sat down at the table until late, chitchatting about everything and nothing, the room only lit by candles. Charlotte enjoyed these kind of evenings with Cooper: they were putting her in a good mood, even a sensual mood sometimes. Before the attack, she loved to surprise him with some kinky outfits and quick and hot sex when he or she would come home. Now, she didn't even think that was possible anymore, and she hoped she would feel that confidence again some time. But, she must say, these slow and cozy evenings did put her in another kind of mood: not all hot and horny, but more sensual and loving. She could imagine that one day an evening like this could lead to sex again. That still felt like a fantasy, but one she was willing to work for.

'What are you thinking about?' Cooper asked her and carefully touching her hand on the table. Charlotte smiled at him and thought for a moment.

'Nothing, honey, let's go to bed.'

She had tried to read a bit before putting the lights out. Cooper was laying still next to her, but she heard his breathing and knew he was not sleeping already.

'Coop?' She whispered. Cooper didn't reply but turned to her, looking her in the eyes, waiting for her to continue.

'I was talking with Amelia about the way I am, we are, trying to touch each other again,' she said with some hesitation. She didn't know if Cooper understood what she implied and she didn't know if he would think it was weird that she talked about them being intimate again with others, with Amelia.

'I told her that I am still not able to be held by you,' Charlotte said whispering, barely audible for Cooper.

'Do you think it's strange I talk about us with her?'

Cooper reached for her hand, 'Can I?'

She nodded and he took her hand in his, only their hands touching. He stroked her palm with his thumb, just like she did a couple of hours before with Amelia.

'I am proud of you to discuss this with friends, Char,' he said friendly. Charlotte swallowed a lump in her throat and nodded.

'She understood me very well Coop,' Charlotte continued. 'She uhm, actually said some things and suddenly I had the urge to hold her,' Charlotte felt nervous now.

'And I feel bad because I didn't had that urge with you yet. In my mind, I would love to be close to you again and to let you hold me forever, but I feel in my body I'm not ready yet.' Cooper listened without interrupting.

'But with Amelia, I suddenly had the feeling I had to hold her, take her in my arms, and she didn't want me to now, but I was surprised by my own feeling, Coop.'

Cooper had a little frown now, he didn't know what was going on with Amelia but he felt she must have told Charlotte something important.

'Charlotte, you really don't have to feel guilty about your feelings towards…towards touching people. Just because I am your husband doesn't mean I need to be the first one you have to be comfortable with. Also, I am a man…' Cooper felt some pain in his heart while saying this. As much as he wanted it to not be a thing, he believed the fact he was a man made things a bit harder for Charlotte. He could imagine that she would feel closer to a woman right now, less triggered.

Charlotte tried to suss him. 'Coop, no, no, I don't want you to think that because you're a man I am…I am not capable of…You know I really want to be intimate again with you Coop, you're not just a man, you're my Cooper, you know…' Charlotte was rambling a bit.

Cooper smiled a bit, it was cute to see her trying to defend her own feelings. He really understood, he really did. Cooper reached for her arm carefully, waiting to see Charlotte's respons. He stroke her arms while thinking for a minute.

'Charlotte, honey, you need to know you don't need my approval in any way. But I would be very happy for you if you would feel safe enough to be hold by someone else than me, by Amelia, or Addison, or Violet or I don't know, even Sheldon, I just want you to feel okay again in your body while touching others, deal? You never ever have to come to me for approval or anything, I would just be happy if you would share these moments like you just did. I am always here.'

Charlotte felt some tears forming in her eyes. Cooper was amazing, too much for her. Her mind knew she didn't need approval from Cooper, but her guts felt like it was important to hear him saying it.

'Thank you,' she whispered.

They were laying in silence next to each other. Charlotte was still not sure if Cooper was sleeping but she lay away thinking about something.

'Coop?' she tried whispering again.

'Yes?' he responded.

'I'm gonna try with Amelia, to…to touch her, to held her, maybe to be held by her. I think she needs me.' Charlotte confessed. Cooper didn't look at her but she felt him smiling next to him. He loved his wife to be so caring, even after something horrible happened to her. She seemed cold and bitchy for some, but this is the side of her he adored the most. He said what he had said a million times these last months.

'I'm proud of you.'