A/N: Just a heads up, this chapter is rated a strong T.

Chapter 19: Closer

The festive mood in the great hall was almost palpable, and even the grouchiest of villagers seemed more upbeat than usual.

It could have just been a co-incidence, but Astrid had a sneaking suspicion it had something to do with the fact that the destruction and damage had been relatively minimal over the last few raids, ever since her husband had taken up the responsibility of participating in them from the sky.

She met Hiccup's eyes from across the table and he shared a knowing look with her, probably thinking the same thing.

"Ahem" said Tuffnut, clearing his throat a bit too loudly. "I thought we were clear on this. No PDA in the presence of others"

Astrid frowned. "PDA? When did we-"

"Staring deeply into each other's eyes counts, right honey?" Interrupted Ruffnut, gesturing towards Fishlegs.

"I... guess so?" He said uncertainly.

"We weren't staring into... ugh" Hiccup complained, but with his face a guilty red, he didn't have much of a shot at placating himself.

Astrid wasn't better off either, but at least she kept her chin up in defiance. "My eyes, my husband. I'll stare at him all I want, thank you very much"

Snotlout audibly groaned, before getting up, muttering some excuse about refilling his drink.

Ruffnut smirked knowingly at Astrid before returning her attention to the feast.

A lot of food, drinks, and dancing later, the crowd had begun to thin out a bit. Hiccup was called by his dad to help with something, and Astrid found herself alone with Ruffnut.

"Sooo..." Ruffnut began with a mischievous smile that could have rivaled Loki himself. "I'll ask you the same thing I did ages ago. Have you done it yet?"

As obvious as it should have been from her sultry tone, it still took Astrid a moment to figure out her meaning. And when she did, her face promptly burst into flames. Talking about these things was never gonna get any easier for her.

"...No" she replied finally, with a slight hesitation that betrayed the fact that there was more to be said.

Ruffnut groaned, "At this rate, I'm gonna be an old maid with three kids by the time you and Haddock finally decide to-"

"Ruffnut!" Astrid squealed, shushing her frantically. Her mother had already been on her case with not so subtle hints towards asking when her parents might be expecting a grandchild, and the last thing Astrid wanted was to give anyone else more material to gossip about.

"So how far have you really gotten?" Ruffnut asked bluntly, peering intensely into her friend's gaze.

Astrid blushed even more and looked intensely towards her lap. "I told you, we've just kissed and cuddled and held hands"

"You're a terrible liar, you know that right?"

Astrid's eyes widened. Ruffnut saw straight through her with a piercing gaze. Then she noticed her smirking not towards her eyes, but at the side of her neck, at a place almost hidden by her hair... and it all suddenly made painful sense.

"Oh gods" Astrid exclaimed and frantically tried to cover the incriminating spot with her braid. Ruffnut just shook her head at Astrid's bashfulness.

"Hey, a little love bite is nothing to be ashamed of, you should show it off!"

"Freyja help me Ruff, my parents are here! what if they saw it?"

"Doesn't matter. First tell me, how did this new... development happen?"

"Well... we were just... making out in bed last night and I kinda got a bit carried away and... um I-I might have..." she trailed off, squeezing her eyes shut, willing the redness in her face to magically go away.

"Might have what?"

"Asked him to... oh gods- I asked him to 'mark me' and well... he did..."

"Gosh, the way you describe these mundane things is making even me all bothered" Ruffnut sighed dramatically, fanning her face. "Please tell me you gave him one in return?"

"Ruffnut!"

"Okay okay" she conceded, palms raised. "Did you though? Under his shirt? somewhere not easily visible?"

"I hate you" Astrid replied with a dead serious face, effectively confirming her theories.

"That's my girl" she whistled in appreciation, earning another hard glare.

Astrid let out a deep, frustrated breath and pouted. "I don't even know what's going on with me anymore"

"Hmm?"

"I didn't use to be like this. Lately, it feels like every little thing he does drives me crazy, and I'm not talking about crazy in a bad way"

"Well, it's understandable, given how unexpectedly Hiccup has been growing up. I'd say it's not even fair to call him a Hiccup anymore, if you know what I mean" she smirked, wriggling her eyebrows.

"Ruffnut Ingerman!" Astrid gasped. "You're married!"

Ruff casually dismissed her with a wave of her hand. "Yeah yeah I know, doesn't mean I can't appreciate your guy, if only for 'educational' purposes"

Astrid didn't feel jealous at all though. If anything, she felt pride for being the wife of Hiccup, and the man he was growing into. Not for his body, but his morals, which were way beyond anyone in this day and age.

"And it's not just kisses and stuff" Astrid continued. "This morning, he put a casual hand on my shoulder and I almost flinched away from the electric touch. And recently, he's even taken to sleeping shirtless sometimes. It's like he's trying to torture me"

Ruff laughed at that. "I'm pretty sure he wants it just as badly as you do too"

Astrid's eyes widened. "Y-You think so?"

"He does, but is too much of a gentleman/wuss to do anything about it"

"But it's not like I'm any better"

"True, but you're the girl. Women are the ones who have the actual power in marriages. How do you think I get Fishlegs to do my chores for me?"

Astrid shook her head at her friend's dubious logic. "Uhh... because he adores you?"

"Wrong! well he does, but that's besides the case. It's the duty of the wife to take any important step in this regard, because you can bet your breeches that the husband will fall at your feet at your first hint"

Despite her over zealous ideals, Astrid did find some truth in them. What if Hiccup wanted to be with her as well, but was dead set on letting her decide? Come to think of it, he'd never really pushed her into anything, and had always followed her lead, albeit with his amicable and genuine enthusiasm.

Even though he'd hinted at and had gotten her first kiss under the guise of a friendly competition, the decision had been totally hers in the end.

As soon as she accepted this in her mind, a path forward became clearer, hopefully one that will lead her out of this ravine of incessant desire and frustration.

And all she had left to do was to take that brave first step.

Snowflakes gathered in Astrid's hair as she helped escort the remaining children to the great hall with Fishlegs and Snotlout.

The snowy night sky blazed purple above them with a resounding boom, and a couple of the kids let out nervous whimpers while one seemed to be on the verge of tears.

They were ushered inside where a lot of the village had already gathered since the beginning of the raid, and she hung around while the others went back outside to help.

"It's okay, you're all gone be completely safe inside" she told them reassuringly, crouching to the level of a small boy and giving him a confident smile.

It was strange, how she was hardly ten to twelve years older than these kids but they seemed to look up to her in awe, as if she had the answers to everything. And funnily enough, she did, have more answers than even any grown up in this room.

"Is that night foo-wi gonna eat us?" asked a small girl, hardly of four summers.

Astrid couldn't help but let out a small laugh, even at a stressful time like this. Due to her full and unwavering faith in her husband, she didn't feel that mixture of anger and hopelessness that most people felt during raids.

"Don't worry sweetheart" she said gently, before leaning forward to whisper in her ear. "That night fury is my friend, and I promise he won't hurt you, not ever"

The girl's eyes widened, but she nodded her head, looking all happy now.

Charmed by their innocence and feeling strangely cheerful, she hurried outside where the teens were working to clear the rubble and extinguish a fire that had started on the side of a barn.

As she joined them, Snotlout eyed her thoughtfully and the thing that she'd been dreading for the last four raids, finally happened. Hiccup's absence was noticed.

"The runt finally learned how to stay inside huh?" He began in that arrogant tone that set her blood boiling. "I knew you'd be able to keep him on a tight leash"

Astrid ignored him and focused on working, and he went on, "It's a good thing too. Why bother coming out here when you'd not even be a light snack for them? That night fury would probably swoop down and snatch him in its-"

"Gods, do you ever shut up?" This was Ruffnut, and Astrid shot her a grateful smile.

Snotlout snorted at that but didn't talk more.

As soon as he'd opened his mouth, Astrid had grit her teeth and clenched her fists instinctively, ready to reply, but then she had heard Hiccup's voice in her head.

Don't bother speaking when someone isn't willing to listen. It's not worth it.

Her husband's unwavering pacifism had definitely rubbed off on her by this point, and she almost wished it hadn't. Teaching Snotlout a lesson with her fists would have been second nature to her earlier, but now she was looking at these things from a higher viewpoint.

It's not worth it to risk letting people get suspicious, Hiccup had said. If anyone thinks I stay inside, that's exactly what we want. Better they think of me as a cowardly loser rather than get a whiff of our plans and jeopardize everything we've worked for.

Even though she had reluctantly agreed to his request, Astrid in no way thought of him with same high standards of humility as he did himself.

Laugh all you want, Astrid mused, picturing every single person who'd ever thought less of Hiccup, had bullied or ridiculed him for being small, weak, or useless.

One day you'll all see what an incredible person he is and the things he has accomplished, and you'll curse your own ignorant selves for judging him so harshly all his life, when he's the one who's gonna save all your lives.

Lying in bed later that night, Astrid found herself unable to sleep. She wasn't sure if she was still too active because of the whole raid or if some small part of her was still anxious about next morning.

As she'd helped Hiccup remove his armor earlier and get ready for bed, he'd mentioned that the next dawn would be a perfect time to try out her first flight on stormfly. Due to the raid, most people would be sleeping in and there wouldn't be any sentries in the arena or anywhere nearby.

Astrid had agreed then, as even she didn't want her first time on a dragon at night, when she couldn't see her surroundings clearly.

But now, she felt like her mind wasn't settled yet, a combination of thoughts about the raid, about Snotlout's comments, about tomorrow's flight, and she just wanted to somehow clear her mind and sleep peacefully, much like her husband was currently doing.

Hiccup had his arms firmly around her and his even breaths tickled her cheek softy. He was clearly tired after the two hours of work for the whole duration of the raid. Even though he always insisted Toothless did all the work, she knew how demanding a task it was, and anyone of lesser talent than him couldn't have dreamed of doing it.

He was Hiccup alright, humble to the core no matter how amazing he kept on becoming.

Maybe some nice hot tea would help her relax? Wriggling out of Hiccup's grasp without waking him proved to be a challenge, but she managed it eventually and quietly went downstairs.

Sipping her tea by the fire, she sighed in satisfaction at the pleasant warmth, even though it didn't hold a candle to the feeling of being in Hiccup's embrace. Her nerves calmed down somewhat, although that anxious tingle in her stomach still persisted. Maybe some part of her was worried about not succeeding tomorrow, not living up to Hiccup's hopes and expectations?

A creaky stair drew her gaze towards a yawning Hiccup coming down the stairs, rubbing his eyes and making his way towards her, before sitting down beside her by the fire. Thankfully for Astrid, he'd put on a shirt before coming down, as she had enough on her mind already without those kinds of thoughts distracting her.

"You should get some rest Hiccup" she chided gently.

Hiccup let out a drowsy protest and pulled her against his side, where she nestled into automatically. "I couldn't feel you on the bed and woke up, so I came down to see if you were okay"

Astrid smiled at his genuine concern for her. "I couldn't sleep"

"Mmm. Are you worried about tomorrow?"

Astrid still marveled at how adept he was at reading her thoughts and feelings.

"Kind of..." Admitting weakness like this was so against her old personality, yet she felt no hesitations in baring herself to him. She kept no secrets from him, not anymore.

"We don't have to do it right now if you aren't ready love, we can wait as long as you need"

"No!" she insisted. "Believe me, I want to do it. It's just a bit hard to imagine myself flying like you do. You're Hiccup"

Hiccup laughed brightly, the sound making her heart go ba-thump. "You're probably the first person in history to say my name as a compliment"

"Hiccup I'm serious!" she whined, cursing his ability to lighten the most serious of moods without even trying.

"I tell you what, get some sleep now, and decide in the morning what you want to do, with a fresh mind"

Astrid nodded. "Okay"

Finishing her tea, she let Hiccup take her hand and lead her upstairs, before resuming her place snug in his arms on the bed as before.

Noting her shifting a bit restlessly, Hiccup asked, "Do you want me to sing to you?"

Astrid giggled at that notion. "You can sing?"

"Hey!" Hiccup protested in mock offence. "I'm good at more things than just metalworking, dragon riding, and looking dashingly handsome, I'll have you know"

"Oh really? with a resume like that, I might even consider marrying you" she said in a mirthful tone.

"Once you hear my melodious voice, you'll be begging for me to take your hand, Miss 'Hofferson' "

"I'll be the judge of that"

Hiccup inhaled deeply before gently starting a soft note, in a voice that cracked slightly, wasn't the most angelic by any means, but it melted her heart all the same.

If I had a heart I could love you,

If I had a voice I would sing...

After the night when I wake up,

I'll see what tomorrow brings...

He hesitated, wondering if she had liked it when she mumbled a "go on" which answered his unspoken question.

The world is so vast,

too vast for me to see...

And yet I wish to see it all,

As long as you're there with me...

He felt her lips smile into his shoulder, making his spirits lift into the clouds.

I know I'm not a warrior

A hundred things I cannot do...

Still the gods have blessed me so,

To be coming home to you..

So sleep well my darling,

with twinkling stars above...

I promise each and every day,

I'll remind you of our love...

He breathed a quiet sigh, still shy from actually having done that but anxious to hear her thoughts.

He felt her make an indecipherable noise against his shoulder and he raised his hand to caress her cheek, before finding wetness there.

"Astrid?" he asked, voice laced with worry. "Did I say something-"

Her teary laugh interrupted him, confusing him even further. "I- I just... never mind. I don't know what came over me..."

Astrid Haddock couldn't recall ever crying tears of happiness before, but the combination of her caring husband holding her in his strong arms while singing about his love for her made her fill to the brim with overwhelming emotions before she had finally let it go, every single wound on her heart healing all at once, all in an instant.

"Hiccup you are... this is..." she trailed off, weakly gesturing around them, around their room, at their home. "This is so perfect that it doesn't even feel real sometimes" she hid her face in his shoulder again, before whispering, "I don't know what I ever did to deserve you"

Hiccup just grinned against her forehead before kissing her there, and replying, "Milady, that's what I say to myself whenever I look at you, every single day"

After an especially deep and restful sleep, Astrid awoke in the pre-dawn light to find her husband still asleep.

This was probably her favorite parts of mornings with him, and her day inevitably brightened whenever she woke up before him, as during these precious moments, she could look at his beautiful face all she wanted, without fear of teasing or shyness.

She had just finished staring at his closed eyes for a long minute and was about to move on to his nose and freckled cheeks, when he sleepily mumbled, "Draw a portrait, it'll last longer"

Surprised at being caught red handed, her pride still made her own it, so she kept up her meticulous observations until he squinted open one eye to gaze at her. "You're cute"

It was unfair. Simply unfair. Astrid frowned.

She could kiss him for hours and hours without getting unreasonably flustered, but a tiny comment like that still set her cheeks ablaze? It made zero sense.

Hiccup chuckled and sat up, and due to the fact that she'd been using him as her bed, she ended up straddling his lap, arms around his neck.

"You're even cuter when you frown" He said smugly, earning a half hearted glare from her.

Hearing his voice made her remember how sweetly he'd sung for her last night, and any thoughts of feigning annoyance with him went out the window.

Deciding she was done with thinking for now, she decided to capture his lips with her own, making him squeak in surprise before he kissed her back.

She kept trying to deepen the kiss but Hiccup kept wriggling under her, not letting her find a rhythm she liked, before pulling away all together and breathing slightly heavily against her cheek.

"What's wrong?" She asked, trying to pull him back in. "Do you not want to kiss me?"

"I do, I d-do of course sweetie, it's just that... umm..." he gently tried to wriggle out from under her, and suddenly it dawned on her what the whole fuss was about.

Seeing the realisation appear on her face and her pink lips forming an 'o', Hiccup cringed in embarrassment and tried to push her away, muttering, "I'm sorry... I didn't mean-"

Wrapping her arms tighter around him, she stayed right where she was, and to his surprise, gave him an almost flirtatious smile. "What are you sorry about Hiccup? It's... it's completely natural"

Hiccup gulped nervously. "So you're not... repulsed by me?"

Astrid shook her head adamantly. "Repulsed? gods no. If anything... I'm just..." she averted her gaze shyly. "I'm just glad you like me in that way... that I have such an effect on you..."

His face was still tomato red, but a look of wonderment appeared on it.

She leaned closer until her lips tickled his ear, before whispering, "Even if it's not as obvious, you have the same effect on me you know"

Hiccup's mouth opened and closed without any sounds coming out, and Astrid half wondered if she'd broken the poor boy for good.

"Shouldn't we get going if we're gonna fly on stormfly today?" she asked coyly.

Hiccup just cocked his head at her, apparently still a mute, his face flushing adorably.

A wave of courage spurred on by his positive reaction made her blurt out words that she'd never imagined herself saying in a thousand years. "If you'd like... I can take care of... that for you, and then we'll be on our way...?"

"T-T-ake...c-c-care?" He asked weakly, too stunned to stop stuttering.

Shocked herself at her own forwardness but determined not to back down, she replied, "I won't look, I promise", slowly running her hand down his chest while looking into his eyes for permission.

It came in the form of an small and wide eyed nod, and her triumphant smile was enough to have lit up the whole world.

Astrid watched on as Hiccup finished tying down the straps of Stormfly's saddle, before turning to her with an excited grin. "Ready to do the honors?"

"I guess so" Astrid replied. The butterflies in her stomach were back but seeing Stormfly squawking with impatience helped hurry her along.

Hiccup helped her climb onto the saddle, and she gingerly took the reigns in her hands. She was gonna do this first flight by herself, as they both had decided.

Hiccup insisted that this was important to strengthen the bond between dragon and rider, and she thought it made sense too, given how close he was with toothless.

As she got ready to give stormfly the signal to launch, Hiccup half-climbed up to the saddle and pecked her on the cheek which helped ease her nerves somewhat. "You got this, milady"

"Thanks babe" she smiled at him, before turning to look at the glittering blue ocean.

Here goes nothing.

A pat on stormfly's scaly neck was all it took, and in a blink of an eye, they launched into the sky with a heart dropping woosh.

Astrid gasped at the overwhelming rush of wind, the speed, the sky, everything. This sensation was completely different from sitting behind Hiccup on toothless, where she felt like a passenger, completely dependent on him.

Here, she literally held the reigns, and as she managed to get her excited dragon to do a wide turn over the ocean which let her witness Berk from the sky, all covered in snow, her husband a mere speck next to the tiny looking arena, she couldn't help but let out an exhilarated "Woooooo!", throwing her head back and letting her messy braid flail wildly in the wind.

All her fear had already evaporated with the first breath of the icy air she'd inhaled amongst the clouds, and all that was left was joy... pure, unadulterated, childish joy.

And she didn't feel like coming down to earth, not anytime soon.

Hope as always that you enjoyed the chapter!

A couple of people asked this so I thought I'd just clarify, I have no plans to change this story's rating, it'll stay at T. That being said, I still wanted to show them getting closer and get the meaning across while still keeping it classy. I hope I did okay here, if it was too much, please let me know and I'll take care from next time.

Thanks for the support and do review, I always love reading them!