Chapter 2: Help A Friendless Person

KAGEYAMA SHIGEO

Uenohara Elementary School

Three o'clock. I have never dreaded the end of the day until today. The bustling chatter of gossiping thoughts murmured from the hallway as Mishima-san bids her friends goodbye and makes her way to my classroom. The news has spread fast. Even though Mishima-san is popular and plenty of other people, boys included, come to talk to her, I learned that I was - for some reason - an exception.

There's a gathering when Mishima-san arrives. My own classmates have stopped by to linger and make small talk. They know what has been buzzing since morning, but they didn't seem to fully believe it until now.

I can't believe Kageyama actually made a move on Mishima-san.

Wow. It does kind of make sense since they're both mature.

Have they been meeting in secret all this time?

I wonder if they're going to be an item in middle school.

This is awkward. How am I supposed to break into the group and greet the popular girl in front of everyone? Mishima-san wanted this. She was trying to be considerate. If it had been me coming to her classroom, people might overreact. I was very new to this kind of thing, so I went along with what she had in mind (literally; I heard it from there.) It's becoming clear Mishima-san hasn't thought things through either.

"Sorry, I need to get going. It's nice catching up with everyone," says Mishima-san, donning the ever-polite, pleasant smile that hasn't changed since fourth grade. I take that as my cue and stand up. Mobs of eyes follow my movement with the command of a bird of prey tracking a hare in winter. Mishima-san catches my eyes.

"Hi, Kageyama-kun. Are you ready?"

"Mishima-san." I dip my head politely, grateful that she has taken the time to listen to me… is what I normally would say. But I used my clairvoyance beforehand to make sure Mishima-san's interests would not conflict today. I don't want to put her in a difficult situation. Mishima-san has a big fatal flaw that I don't want to take advantage of. "I'm good."

"Then let's go." Mishima-san is cheerful. I know she is looking forward to this. It's been a while since someone asked me to hang out! When I heard he was looking for me, I thought he was desperate and needed ten thousand yen by sunset. Rather silly of me. What top student of his year would have time to get in deep trouble?

It is rather silly. Specifically, why a ten thousand yen debt is Mishima-san's first assumption.

"How have you been, Kageyama-kun?" asks Mishima-san, tilting her head. Her straight bangs have been cut shorter recently.

"Um… I guess things could be better," I answer honestly, walking down the stairs with her.

Mishima-san's face falters, somewhat surprised. "Oh, I'm sorry to hear that."

Silence floats between us as we make it to the school gate. Mishima-san is saying something in her thoughts, but I'm distracted by some dark, murderous brooding I'm hearing from somewhere. I can't believe she betrayed me! Did she think she can get away? I'm just going to fucking murder her in her sleep.

"Do you remember when you first transferred? I told you if you needed anything, I'm more than happy to help. You were more than fine on your own though. It was the first time someone in class beat me in grades. It was quite a shock." Mishima-san takes a look at the sky rolling with white clouds as she reminisces. "I thought to myself, 'So this is what the real world feels like. There's always someone out there who will be better than me.'"

"My dad said something like that to me." I force a smile, trying to focus on the conversation.

Mishima-san is curious. "Was someone better than you?"

I nod instantly, relaxing "Yeah. Ritsu." Though Ritsu isn't what made Dad say that to me.

"Oh, Ritsu-kun! I did hear that! I remember how small and cute he was in the third grade. Who would have thought he'd turn into something so scary?" She shivers at the image.

I stiffened, staring at Mishima-san. "You… you think so?"

Mishima-san is confused at first. Then she blushes in embarrassment, bowing. "Sorry, it was a joke. I don't mean he's scary in that he has a bad personality. Whenever I saw you two together, he seemed so sweet."

"Ah, no, that's not it…" I understand exactly what Mishima-san meant. I rethink how to phrase my question. "Does being really good at something make you scary?"

"Hmm, it has to be amazing. But it can be scary if that person is your rival, or maybe if you don't understand how they can be so good at what they do."

The familiar red-painted sidewalk opens up before us. Two cars drive quickly by the single-lane road and the train blares ahead above small houses with small gardens. The park nearest our school is the first destination for students, so Mishima-san and I are going to take a 15-minute walk up a small trail instead, where an isolated playground lies at the bottom of a shrine.

The mountain forests in the backdrop gives Mishima-san an idea. "We're already in the middle of the year, so this might be strange to ask. Did you do anything fun during Golden Week?"

I teleported my family to the most secluded hot spring in the country, which I can't tell her. So I shake my head, opting for a truthful but incomplete answer. "We made a last-minute fishing trip after camping in spring vacation. We were still tired."

"That takes me back. I haven't fished since I was 9. Just by the river though."

I nod, understanding. Uenohara has plenty fishing spots from its several lakes and rivers. I don't find fishing particularly stimulating. I actually really dislike it initially since I can read the mind of the fishes slowly suffocating out of the water. But it's a rare opportunity for just us four to be together outside the house. The association with family time has evened out the cons.

On our way up the trail, an elderly woman recognizes Mishima-san and offers us persimmon fruits. Every home practically has a persimmon tree, even ours, but we're up for a free snack while walking. I don't dislike persimmons but they taste better as pudding.

"Kageyama-kun, I hope this is okay to ask, but is there a reason you didn't want Ritsu-kun to know we're meeting after-school?"

I blink in surprise. How did Mishima-san know that? I never gave out any hint Ritsu is related to this.

"Was I mistaken? Sorry."

"Not really… But how did you figure it out?"

Mishima-san chuckles half-nervously. "Don't take this the wrong way, but I wasn't really convinced you would want to hang out with me all of a sudden. I was expecting to see Ritsu-kun by the gate, but he wasn't there. If he's busy, I figure you would simply be going home on your own. I think it's too much of a coincidence that you decided to reach out to me right when he's not around. So the most probable situation is that he didn't know or you asked him not to wait."

And I highly doubted it was going to be a confession, thinks Misihima-san.

I drum my fingers on my backpack strap."I didn'twant Ritsu to know, but I wasn't trying to hide it from him. I had to tell him I was going to go ahead to meet with someone."

"Oh, I see."

"He didn't seem bothered though," I explain to Mishima-san, looking at her. "He didn't ask who, or why. He was totally fine."

"It's good he doesn't mind not knowing."

"It's weird!" I exclaim, startling Mishima-san. "I don't have any friends. 'Someone' is way too suspicious!"

He just admitted with a strangely earnest face that he doesn't have friends. "You're over-thinking it, Kageyama-kun. Ritsu-kun is respecting your privacy."

That makes sense, but not wondering in his thoughts either? Ritsu was indifferent outside and inside. He was so unnaturally chill.

"Well, it doesn't really bother me. I just thought it wasn't like him," I add, feeling attacked by Mishima-san's stare. "But um, he is why I wanted to talk to you. Sorry for…not being direct." I look away. "We can go back. It's not too late to enjoy your day."

I don't want to hear Mishima-san's thoughts even though I deserve what's coming. I can't help but to since my focus is on her. If I zone out to not overhear them, I'll appear rude.

"Kageyama-kun, you don't have to worry about that." Mishima-san doesn't even think about it. She's smiling when I look at her, ever-polite, and something else I can't name. Sincerity? Thoughtfulness? "I'm sorry if it gave you mixed signals, but I was really looking forward catching up with you! Oh, and knowing I'm the one you wanted to confide in makes me feel touched."

I'm dumbfounded. "We were classmates but other than that… I didn't reach out until now that I needed you for something. Doesn't that upset you?"

Mishima-san is unimpressed by my logic. "Like I said, I'm touched that you thought about reaching out to me." Do you want me to hate you for not being chummy with me when we first met? I'm not that shallow. "It's not like you were mean to me, Kageyama-kun."

I'm stuck. I can't come up with anything to think or say. For a moment this mundane, there are a lot of things to process. I have never thought hard about my time in school or what Mishima-san feels, yet something about this revelation has blown me away unexpectedly. Maybe it's because I never thought about it that I'm caught off-guard? No… I thought I knew everything. I should. I hear people's real feelings all the time.

"Kageyama-kun," says Mishima-san, pointing at a drinking fountain. We have already arrived at the playground, or we might have been standing here for a few minutes already, engrossed in our conversation. "Let's refill our water bottles."

Mishima-san had been the one to initiate every interaction (a couple at most) we had. It was expected for the class representative to help the transfer student, so I hadn't considered much of the gesture. She kept up checking on me until it became clear I didn't need her help, because some time in the year, I overtook her in both academic and physical tests. The top student that everyone loved was being soundly defeated by a quiet, aloof classmate that hailed from another school.

It's so unfair to Hitomi.

I'm rooting for Hitomi-chan. She deserves it.

Like Mishima-san said, it was a shock for her. Out of twenty-nine students, she was the only one to congratulate me.

Hitomi-chan is so nice. Kageyama-kun on the other hand…

He should at least act humble.

He's so arrogant.

We have to be nice to him since he's new and special, or else we'll be scolded.

Being born being able to hear people's thoughts builds extreme resilience. Keyword on "build." I wasn't born able to stand what people are actually thinking and have the gal to smile and act friendly toward Ritsu and I. How can I be expected to trust people? Even when I've outed others for their true feelings, they easily transform into a masterful liar. They become loud, they shake and sweat, or pour out a few tears. They turn their guilt and panic into passion that convinces people to their side, turn spectators to turn on me with anger.

Mishima-san was wrong.

Kageyama-kun… Did I do something to him? He doesn't have to be so mean.

Thoughts come unbidden most of the time. Ordinary people aren't even always aware of making them. It's natural Mishima-san to forget what was only a moment of insecurity. Even if she did say it out loud and I reminded her that she did think that way, what difference would it make? Mishima-san was right.

But I don't regret it. I'm not sorry for the way I was. Even though I did not interact with them, they decided to dislike me for not conforming to their expectations.

Mishima-san stopped talking to me every after announcement of my impressive result.

Instead, she started talking to me during breaks. ("You write your notes in pen? Wait, are those drawings?")

She would wave at me in the hallway. ("Are you heading to the library too?")

She introduced me to her friends, helped bridge the gap between our classmates and I. ("Take and I have been friends since kindergarten. He always knows what to give me on my birthday.")

She was friendly to Ritsu. (His hair really is pink like Kageyama-kun's...and he dresses so fashionably! )

I learned why Mishima-san was so well-liked. As she said earlier, the defeat came as a shock to her. She did not dwell on the it for too long. Since I wasn't responding to her about my high scores, she changed her approach accordingly. This is why Mishima-san is the only person I can think of asking. Mishima-san is an optimist who does not let challenges dishearten her.

Mishima-san is disheartened by the challenge I presented to her.

"Are you sure it's me who you should be asking?" she frets nervously. "I'm an only child. Didn't you know that?"

"But you were able to help a friendless person like me," I point out, trying to encourage her.

He's saying he's friendless rather earnestly again. "I just did what any person would do," she replies timidly.

Not surprised she would talk like this. I have a feeling Mishima-san has always been like this even before I came along to break her record.

"Besides, Kageyama-kun," starts Mishima-san with a sigh, "Family relationships are a whole other matter. There's the dynamics between the individuals, the socio-economic situation of the family, the parents' backgrounds and their relationship, the parenting style they used - which could be different for every child. I don't know Ritsu-kun well enough in the first place."

After a while of both of us mulling in silence, Mishima-san smiles sadly. "I'm sorry I can't help."

"It's not your fault." I'm feeling down with the development but I would feel worse if it affected Mishima-san too.

"Can I say something though?"

I nod.

Mishima-san moves her legs lightly to make her swing move. "I think it's great that you want to be a better brother, but you're also still a child. You don't know what's best for Ritsu-kun, or for another human being. If Ritsu-kun wants to study in Tokyo, that's for your parents to deliberate…"

There's more that Mishima-san wants to know. Though I open the information freely to her, she's careful about the boundaries.

"… Trying to make him change his mind by emotionally tying him to relationships is… pretty horrible."

It's physically possible to have any boundaries with me. I'm used to it. I already heard this from her thoughts, but I would be lying if I said it didn't sting hearing it aloud. I smile ruefully at a leaf-covered slide across us. "Yeah. I can only come up with horrible things. It makes sense with my nasty personality."

Mishima-san's swing comes to a halt. Her hand rests on my shoulder comfortingly. "I can tell you care a lot about Ritsu-kun. Everyone in the school does. Maybe it would help not to be too single-minded. There are other feelings to consider besides your concern for him."

"What other feelings?" I ask, slightly frowning.

"For example, feeling lonely when Ritsu is gone."

I shake my head repeatedly. That's definitely not it. Ritsu will still be coming home. I can even pick him up personally by teleporting. He'll practically just be in another classroom, but physically farther.

Mishima-san doesn't believe me and laughs softly. "Then, how about feeling confused? 'Why does Ritsu suddenly want to study in another school?' Something like that."

Impossible again. I can read his mind. None of his actions would ever be confusing for me. Mishima-san doesn't get it, but it's not her fault. I'm sure if I were an ordinary person, Mishima-san's advices would be spot on.

"I really think you should talk to him. It's clearly bothering you."

I actually know why Ritsu wants to study in Tokyo. His real objective is to get a scholarship in a private high school while working part-time, but he thinks it would be killing two birds with one stone if he got used to Tokyo by enrolling in a middle school there. My parents think it's too much, thankfully. Middle school is just a period of preparation for high school. I'll be entering it in a couple of months. I doubt there's going to be that much of a difference other than the uniform.

But for some reason, Ritsu is incredibly serious about this. It's the first time he's become so set on something.

A part of me is trying to tell me that Ritsu is doing this to distance himself from me… But that's impossible. I would have heard from his thoughts if he hated me that much. After all, I can read his mind.

"I'm sure Ritsu-kun would appreciate it," insists Mishima-san gently, noticing my skeptical reaction, "After all, he can't read your mind."

Author's Notes:

[Character Introduction]

Mishima Hitomi is from Hinamatsuri, a comedy series involving psychics adjusting in ordinary human society. Not very far-off from from where this fanfic's Shigeo's is from, but they're still very different brands of amazing stories. Hitomi isn't a psychic, don't worry. You might think that's a spoiler, but I want to be established that the canons I'm going to pull aren't all going to be ability-users. More normal people are good. (Hitomi is actually one of my favorites, but I think she's the only one that can fit this particular role for Shigeo.)