"Alright. Sclippy, can you make a note? Any time Aegeus convinces me to try and kill a pig with nothing more than a dinky stick, when the pig is two men tall, slap me please."
The white haired man sighs, but the mirthful grin on his face says it all. "Don't call me Sclippy. And besides, beating a man eating boar with nothing more to show for it than a broken arm is impressive. Especially when you're not a demigod."
The fact that his arm feels like it's caked in cement, even though he's pretty sure plaster casts weren't a thing yet, doesn't make him feel any better. It's ITCHY!
"I guess so, Sclippy. I mean I could be dead in the gut of an animal about to be sacrificed to Lady Artemis. Instead I'm going to be having pork for dinner, which will probably have her show up to mooch off me."
The grin on his face is a lazy one. Eris can be annoying, but she's tolerable. He wouldn't call them friends though, not with the way the people of this country are all so jumpy about the gods. Any other situation they'd probably be those two dickhead friends.
"Again, my name isn't Sclippy. And why can you never call her Lady Eris? And she does not mooch, she has access to the finest of all of Greece."
"I don't call her Lady Eris when she steals my food any time she comes here. I respect her plenty, but I've had problems with people like that before. Letting them get closer, or if they have something over you, isn't a great idea. I call her Lady only when I need something, otherwise she's a mooch and I'm not-so-fatboy or her 'pet champion' as she says."
The flattest look is sent at him, and he can't help the quirk of his lips. "Chein, she's a god and specifically your patron god. She'll always have something over you."
"And I don't want her to have any more than that over me. Hence, I'm not calling her Lady Eris when she's going to steal my food."
Watching Asclepius shake his hair, a twinge in his head makes its presence known. Wait a moment…
"Must everything be about food for you, Cheinten? Do you not have a man or woman you look favourably on? Is Lady Eris not pretty enough? Didn't you date her that day on your little debacle with Alcides?" He's kind of entirely ignoring just about everything Asclepius is saying at this point. His friend will probably yell at him if he ever finds out.
Still, his hair is moving very familiarly. Almost like… "Oi Sclippy. Do me a favour yeah? Take the two longest strains of your hair at the front and cross them over your nose, so they're under your eyes."
"What? Why would I do that?" His friend frowns as if the idea is ridiculous, but he still wants to know.
"Just humor me. I think the look is a memory."
The white haired man scoffs, rolling his eyes for good measure, before styling his hair in that exact dumbass style his other self had in Grand Order!
"Oh… Fuck me rugged."
The smirk on his friend's face is annoying, because he said that out loud, but mortification can wait.
"I didn't know you found hair so attractive. Perhaps I should give Lady Eris some ideas, you can be denser than a rock at times."
Wiping a hand across his face, he frowns. "That isn't what I mean and you know it, Asclepius. Ask your father if the Grand Orders will be happening in this world please? I'd like to know in advance so I can prepare."
His friend mouths the words to himself, testing them and feeling the emphasis he's placed on them. Still, that also means that he could probably assist Asclepius in finishing his legend, and then say that it's for the survival of the world!
Maybe. He'll need to figure out a way for his one sane friend to at least survive Zeus striking him down. Assuming he still can, with how different Eris was becoming while exposed to the lightning from his core.
Fucking hell, he'd managed to win her a bet where she got one of his lightning cores! Poseidon losing one of his cores drove the god machine mad, what would it do to the worst of them, divine spirit or not!?
"What makes you believe my father will listen to your warning?"
He blinks at the words, looking back up at his friend. "Sorry what? I wasn't listening to you. I'm building up to a panic attack I think."
"Panic in a moment, this is a place of healing," his friend's voice is flat, but there's humor there.
"What makes you believe my father shall listen to you, Cheinten. As far as he knows, you are but a strange man dropped from the sky that Lady Eris took an interest in as a pity case, who somehow managed to be valuable. Why would he listen to you?"
His brain is stalling for a moment, being put on the spot always tends to do that with him, but he can still go over what he knows might happen.
"Uhh… Is Paris alive at the moment?"
A confused blink is his only answer before Asclepius leaves the room. Shite.
"Well, whatever then. Wonder when dinner is?"
The heavenly smell reaching him is wonderful, his mouth watering as the mixture of spring onions, garlic and what smells like cilantro mixed together with the pork. Even the hints of vegetables he's getting are blended seamlessly with the meat into a wonderful mixture just dying to be eaten!
Unfortunately, his lovely daydream is burst when he hears a particular "Ufufu."
Sighing out of his nose, and almost crying as the delectable smell vanishes, he groans. "Hello Eris. How are you today?"
The quiet chuckle reaches his ears as the goddess practically drapes herself over the rest of the recovery bed, even pushing him part way off so she can lay down. "It's good to see you too, not so fat-boy. I heard my pet champion managed to fell a maneater boar by himself, and then ask a question of Apollo that put him into a fugue. So of course I simply had to involve myself. Now, spill the beans please."
Are beans even a thing in this part of Europe yet? Ah, who cares.
"To answer your second question, I asked if Apollo knew whether the Grand Orders were happening in this world. And I forgot that, because of when we are, that it both does and doesn't happen. As for the first question, I needed to get faster and didn't want to beg Lord Hermes for a favour. So I was made to hunt a maneater boar by myself. Happy?"
Opposite to his hopes, the grin on Eris' face only stretches wider, the now stormy white haired woman looking particularly feral at the moment as she quickly towers over him.
"Oh my my. You can see the future, my pet champion? Tell me so, please?"
Sweating slightly, he looks up at the white haired goddess practically planting him into the bed. It almost feels like she's about to eat him or mount him.
He isn't sure which would be worse to endure while she's like this.
Squirming slightly, because with the way she's positioned her knee is about to go right into his jewels, he's trying to figure out how to spin it.
"Uh. Not quite? I mean I know of a future. Or a main future with a bunch of variations at one point. And considering that Zeus and the other twelve don't have their machina forms I'll assume the one variation of this time that I do know of isn't going to happen. But I can't see The future. Or at least not yet. I don't know if it randomly develops, cause this one weak dude that wasn't much managed to develop it. I think."
She pouts, but thankfully for his delicates she moves back to bury herself on his thankfully uninjured side. He's a bit happy that he's too exhausted to tense up, everyone in this time is so touchy. "Well that's boring. What's the point of knowing futures that probably won't happen if you exist in them? You're already disrupting things enough as is, believe it or not. Your friendship with Alcides alone has potential for a great many things."
What does that…
"Are you telling me I could prevent Alcides from killing his wife? And his kids? Cause I'll do that, favour from Lady Hera or not. He's a dick, but he doesn't deserve that. Not yet anyway."
Before either of them can continue talking, one of the serving ladies that Aegeus has on call walks in with a really ornate looking bit of pottery covered with meats and cheese. He doesn't know what kind, but it's not covered in moss, so it's probably acceptable.
Safer than drinking normal milk anyway.
The woman also doesn't blink at seeing Eris, simply bowing with a "My lady" thrown in, before depositing the platter on the bed and positioning herself just outside the door. Though the strange looks she keeps throwing at him are a bit weird.
Welp. That's more for the rumor pile then. Still, pork! His grin isn't even removed by Eris taking the first helping, it smells divine.
"So you killed this with your gangly little arms. I'm Impressed. And to answer your question from earlier, you could yes. But then would he become as strong as he's needed to be for the grand orders as you called them? Is interfering really in his best interests?"
There isn't any sadistic joy in her face, nor sympathy or anything else. Just simple questioning as she stares up at his face. He appreciates that, honestly.
"Well, what about you? If you had the option to save your daughter from her current fate, would you?"
He's pushed a button bringing up Lethe, that's obvious in her expression instantly darkening. And her hair turning into a thundercloud? That's actually really cool. He's also likely pissed her off.
"Just for that, half of your meal belongs to me. But yes. If my daughter could be made to remember me, I would jump at the opportunity. But that is me. Alcides isn't your family, in fact you two are barely friends. And he destroyed your body the last time you fought. So why would you help him?"
The thunder tapers off, but her expression is one he honestly finds sad.
"You're genuinely confused on why I want to help someone. That's… actually incredibly depressing. I guess the reason I want to help him is cause I've seen what happens to him, and in the future, even when he's summoned as a shell of himself in a rage so potent he can't even speak, he still remembers what he did, and hates himself for his failures. So yes, I want to help him. It's as simple as empathy."
The meat is delicious, the spices mixing with the oils from the meat into a wonderful blend of flavouring. He honestly can't even tell what's gone into it with the way they're mixed, each spice mixing together without overpowering the others.
But even as focused on the food as he is, he doesn't miss Eris' words.
"Empathy? I guess I can work with Empathy."
Later that night, Cheinten wakes up in discomfort. His arm is itchy, and the other one is pinned to his body.
Staring down at the roving hair made of clouds laying on his shoulder, he huffs quietly. "You know your bed is probably more comfortable than sharing mine. Why couldn't you just go back home?"
An eye is cracked open, swiveling to look at him, and he can already tell Eris is grinning. "And yet despite your words, you aren't doing anything to remove me. I am comfortable right where I am now, with a half decent bed-warmer. Even if you are prudish. Meanwhile my bed back on Olympus may have someone steal into it in the night in an attempt to steal my virtue. Would you really allow such a fate to befall me?"
Blinking quietly at the goddess, he can feel he's too exhausted for this conversation. He knows this because he almost said 'what virtue?' "Alright, whatever, you can stay. And what do you mean half decent? I'd think I'm rather warm."
The goddess, rather than answering him, digs the side of her face further into his collarbone. "I call you half decent because you only do half the job of a bed warmer. Now, be quiet. I am comfortable, and your talking moves your chest in annoying ways."
Shuffling into the bed, careful not to jostle his arm, Cheinten rolls his eyes. "Well excuse me. Aint like I got woken up by you making my arm go numb or anything."
As if to spite him, she giggles quietly before gripping his arm tighter. "Definitely seems to only be a problem for you. Now unless you're about to show me a good time, stop talking. And don't think I won't dose you with my daughter's waters if it means you'll stop."
He can tell she's serious because she doesn't have her usual capricious grin on her face. Rather she has a lazy smirk with a half turned eye that just promises pain.
Wait… Lethe, who's water puts people to…
"Eris? Did you dose Alcides with Lethe's water so I could beat him?"
She doesn't respond for quite a bit. At least it feels like it. He's slightly nervous now.
Soon enough, she shifts herself, moving over his body in a predatory stance.
"And If I did? What are you going to do, little champion?"
She stares down at him as if he's an ant almost, just daring him to object or try to fight. The electricity in her body seems to focus purely in her eyes, the golden colour becoming closer to a green. And yet despite the primal fear trying to surge into his body, all he can feel is relief.
"That's probably the nicest thing anyone's done for me in most of my life."
Watching her blink in shock satisfies a part of his brain he'd been trying to ignore since he'd gotten to this place. But what else would he say? 'How dare you prevent me from being splattered against a wall?'
"Eh? Y-You're supposed to be angry that I interfered! Which then makes me remind you of your place at my feet! You aren't supposed to thank me!" She's incredibly flustered, and it's honestly adorable. And he can tell she noticed that thought because her face has scrunched up even more.
Who knew that a flustered goddess would act more like an embarrassed school-girl than an angry force of nature.
Of course, getting grabbed by the shoulders and shaken as Eris insists she's "Not embarrassed" is a bit annoying, but it's not like he was going to sleep anytime soon.
Still, a little while after all that energy has bled off, he just lays against the headboard, staring at the now much quieter goddess.
"I am serious though Eris. That's probably the nicest thing anyone I know or remember has done for me. I kind of wish you'd hit him with it earlier in the fight, but that's just because I spent nine days laid out because of it."
She slaps against his chest lightly, having re-taken her space pinning down his arm. "Stop thanking me and go to sleep. I'm tired, and you didn't let me have my fun with teasing you."
"I don't think I will stop thanking you. I suppose you can filch food off of me sometimes. It's the least I can do." His grin is stretched wide, knowing exactly how she's going to react.
Which is proven correct when she slaps his chest again. "You're just trying to suck all the joy out of being your patron goddess aren't you!? I told you the food tastes better when it's stolen! You get all angry and it's funny! Stop taking away my fun!"
Giving her a shit eating grin, he watches the small hope she has die. "No, I don't think I will."
The third slap is a bit harder than the first two, but god if her reactions aren't hilarious.
Despite the slightly louder volume, he's not too worried about anyone waking up. Meta hasn't tried to break into his room in a while, and Theseus and Aegeus are generally asleep at this point.
"Where did all this confidence come from anyway? Usually you just grumble."
Snorting slightly, he shifts his position in the bed as he thinks it over. "I sensed weakness and pounced on it. You were surprised at the idea of empathy, so I decided to see if thanks were what pierced your armour."
Sighing dramatically, Eris rests a hand on her forehead. "I knew you were just waiting for me to let my guard down. Oh how horrible my champion is-EEK!" The reason for her sudden squeak is a rather sudden pinch of her bottom.
Her head whips up towards him, and there's a fire in her eyes. "I hope you realise this means war."
Grinning as his eyes shut, even as he knows she'll take advantage of him not watching her to get her revenge, he sighs out quietly. "Of course. May the better player win. Rule number one, nothing that will potentially kill either of us."
"I think I have a better idea." He opens his eye a crack but before he can blink he feels the cool air of the night on his body, and then the cold marble of the ground.
She kicked him out of the bed!
Oh, his arm isn't throbbing anymore. He hadn't even noticed. Maybe he can get the cast off tomorrow. But still, bed!
He doesn't get to sleep that night. Eris is much too attached to the bed to let him take it back, and he's far too stubborn to stop. Before either of them know it, it's day break, Theseus is running in, and he's trying to bludgeon Eris with a chancla. It's the one weapon that manages to pierce her defenses.
The scene of course looks like he's paddling her, so of course Theseus doesn't shut up about it to his exhausted face for the rest of the time they interact that day.
On the plus side, Aegeus lets him have some rest after his "nightly escapades."
These people are way too focused on sex. Like sure, he'd consider it, but he's barely known anyone here for longer than a month and a half. That's just awkward, and he's not a one night kind of guy.
He is thankful he got the cast off before he went to sleep though. It feels like tiny insects are biting him before he conks back out.
His sleep is relaxed, and glorious. It also lasts most of the day. He's not about to apologize for it either, and the grumbling that Theseus makes when he finally wakes up for dinner is hilarious.
Today is a good day.
[End.]
And that's chapter six. Sorry it took so long, i got stuck on the last part of the chapter for literally six months. then I got stuck figuring out how to end it.
I hope you enjoy it.