Road Trip Part 2
Okay, so the first few hours didn't go, extremely well ,but…
"I think I'm gonna throw up." Gloria deadpanned as everyone tumbled out of the truck onto the motel parking lot.
Actually no 'but', it just sucked.
"Me first." Chip whined as he stood up and attempted to dust himself off. Tilly leaned against his legs for support whilst Cricket darted in circles across the parking lot, desperate to stretch his legs.
"Heh, I guess I can drive a little jerky." Mom laughed, sheepishly rubbing her neck.
"You think?" Everyone sarcastically barked. Mom just grinned guiltily as she grabbed her bag and shut the truck door, heading for their room.
"Okay, our room number is 234, we'll have to take the elevator." Gloria clarified, skillfully nabbing Cricket by his overalls before he could accidentally trip over himself as he raced after them along the cracked concrete. "Thanks Glor" Cricket said as they neared the elevator.
"Did you seriously only get one room?" Chip complained once they shuffled inside.
"Was all we could afford, okay." Mom explained as she tiredly punched the up arrow. Cricket could feel Gloria's warning glare through the back of his head as the elevator started to move. Heh. "Everyone just relax, we'll make due."
Cricket was just glad Chip literally only had one suitcase to pack(which he'd already stuffed it to the brim as it were). Cricket didn't want to think about what horde the former ceo would be toting along otherwise.
"I can always take the bathtub if need be." Tilly pitched once they got out and started heading for the room.
Mom laughed, shaking her head. "I don't think that'll be needed ,but that's still very generous sweet pea."
Tilly nodded, trailing her hand against the railing until they finally found room 234 and opened the door.
Chip wrinkled his nose as soon as they entered the room. "I think I'd rather sleep in the Kludge."
"I do have to wonder what that interesting smell is." Tilly added, pinching her nose. Cricket had to agree, it smelled worse than Phoenix's kennel in here.
"C'mon it's not that bad." Mom tried as she set her bag down on one of the two queen sized beds. "Back when I was a biker I used to crash in motels like these all the time."
"You poor thing." Cricket couldn't tell if Chip was being sarcastic or if he actually felt bad for Mom.
"Look, as long as there's a running shower I couldn't care less." Gloria announced as she undid her ponytail. "Speaking of, I'mma just, hopinfirstandnoonecanstopme!"
"Ah what?!" Chip complained, but the bathroom door had already slammed shut and he was left to cross his arms and mutter threats about if all the good towels got used up.
Cricket turned to Tilly with a shrug as they hopped up onto the bed closest to the T.V. and pressed play on the remote.
"Okay how about girls in one bed, boys in the other?" Nancy suggested as they finally finished their dinner of vending machine snacks and copious amounts of Splish. Cricket was surprised he wasn't vibrating at this point.
"Oh grea' tha' means I get stu' with tha' sleep grap'er" Chip complained as he brushed his teeth.
Everyone arched a brow.
"Sleep grappler?" Tilly repeated, looking at Cricket, who seemed both confused and offended.
Chip sighed, ducking back into the bathroom so he could spit. "Yeah, sleep grappler, Cricket's like a leech. As soon as he closes his eyes he just grabs onto the nearest person and doesn't let go."
"Ohhh" Tilly's eyes widened in understanding. "Yeah, Cricket does tend to do that."
Cricket scoffed, throwing his hands to the air in indignation. "Wha- I do not 'grapple' people."
Gloria and Nancy shared a look.
"I don't know, Cricket you do kind of do that, remember that time you fell asleep on your break and I had to wake you up, took me a whole hour to get you off my leg. You're like a.. sleep leech."
"Hey,I already named it sleep grappler." Chip argued as Cricket reveled in the shock of Gloria's epic betrayal. Gloria ignored him as she fixed her pillow.
"I don't know sleep leech does have a nicer ring to it." Tilly commented honestly.
"Tilly." Both Chip and Cricket whined for different reasons.
"Alright, everyone settle down." Mom chimed as she sat down on the bed. She lifted Tilly by the waist and sat her between herself and Gloria before turning their bedside lamp off. "I'm not usually one to say this, but let's all just try and get some sleep okay. We gotta hit the road early tomorrow if we're gonna make it to Medium City on time."
Cricket huffed, crossing his arms as Chip propelled himself backwards onto the side of the bed facing the window.
"Well I might be a sleep grappler, but at least I'm not a pillow thief." Cricket pointed out, not so subtly glaring at Chip.
"Excuse me?" Chip arched his brow as he folded his arms beneath his head. "Pillow thief? Me? Seriously? Please."
Again Gloria and Mom shared a look.
Cricket's gaze flattened. "Chip, one time you tried to steal Phoenix's dog pillow, and when she tried to fight you for it you just grabbed her too."
Chip scoffed, raising himself to his elbows. "It was dark, okay! And how I was supposed to know she wasn't an inanimate object, she moves about as much as one anyway!"
"No argument there, that dog sits stiller than y'all's Gramma sometimes." Gloria cut in, propped up by her arm. "And you losers just better be glad you're not sleeping with the kick meisters over here." She gestured to Mom and Tilly with her thumb. "No offense guys."
Mom stifled a laugh, folding her arms over the covers. "Hey me and Tilly might kick ,but at least we're not a thousand and one degrees."
Everyone laughed at that, poor Dad could put the sun to shame with how hot he slept.
Cricket sighed, settling into the cheap seats as he stared out the window. Moonlight peaked in through the curtains as the sounds of the busy interstate rang from outside. Tilly and Chip's snoring complimented each others' as Cricket eyes slowly closed.
Yeah, maybe this trip wasn't going too bad after all.
"Argh! How did we oversleep?!" Nancy yelled as everyone scrambled to get dressed and out the door.
Gloria panicked as she hastily threw on her sweatshirt and helped Tilly find her shoes. Chip just barely managed to balance himself as he hastily shoved his own shoes one at a time and buttoned his blazer jacket. Cricket was still asleep and latched onto Chip's back like a mind controlling alien.
"Cricket wake up!" Chip barked as he tried to wrestle the ten year old off.
"No time, our check out's at 9, we gotta go!" Nancy explained, opening the door and shuffling everyone out. Tilly just barely had time to nab her shoes as they ran for the elevator.
"Ow, ow, another pebble. Ow. "
Gloria gritted her teeth as she realized Tilly was slowing down and nabbed her by the scruff of her dress. She tossed the twelve year old over her shoulder and took the lead, sprinting to the elevator just in time to jam the down arrow.
Everyone took a minute to pant as they rode the elevator down.
"Okay," Nancy sighed as she leaned against the backseat window next to Gloria and Tilly. "Sorry about that everyone, my uh, phone must've turned off or something while we were sleeping."
Or more likely, she just forgot to set the alarm in the first place.
'Urgh, c'mon get it together Nanc.' The biker berated herself as everyone ate their burger clown breakfast to go. 'Bill's not here, so I have to step up,be the one in charge for once…'
"Ah man, they gave me another stinkin blue guy." Cricket complained as he tossed the cheap toy away in the Burger Clown bag. "Just great."
Nancy smiled, ruffling her son's hair. "Cheer up sug, we're about to have a boatload of fun I can just feel it."
Well she was half right.
"~Barryyyy cuda! Whoo~" "~Barryyy Cuda! Whoo~" Chip and Cricket sang as they drove. The two were practically in sync. Chip drummed his fingers against the steering wheel whilst Cricket sang his verses through the passenger side window.
Everyone else groaned.
"Make it stoooooop." Gloria begged, cowering against the Kludge floor with her head between her knees.
"`Barry Cuda~Barry Cuda~"
Tilly turned to Nancy with a dead eyed look. "Mama if we don't make it through this, I just want you to know I love you."
Nancy sighed. "I know, me too sug."
"~Barry Cuuuda..~" "~Barry Cuuuda..~"
Nancy, Gloria, and Tilly collectively sighed as they recognized the song's end. Chip arched his brow as he passed another pick up. "Okay, one more tim-"
"NO!" Gloria shrieked. She dove over the front seat and ripped out the aux cord from Chip's phone before Cricket could hit play.
Nancy's eyes widened as Gloria possessively held the phone to her chest like Frodo protecting his ring. "No more barry cudas!"
"Oh c'mon it's a good song." Chip argued, staring at Gloria through the rear view mirror.
"A: It's not and B, Chip you've played it fifteen times in a row. Pick something else!"
Chip and Cricket flinched back slightly at Gloria's scream.
Nancy delicately laid a hand on the younger woman's shoulder. "Maybeee you guys could let one of us pick the next song?"
"Uh last I checked, the driver gets to pick the music?" Chip shot back smugly, not ready to give up just yet.
Gloria rolled her eyes. "Fine then I will drive, just pull over somewhere."
Chip scoffed in annoyance, but thankfully relented. "Fine, I needed some beauty sleep anyway."
"~Baby I got money and life's so rad, got enough riches to buy your dad~"
Chip felt his eye twitch as he eyed Gloria's smug grin from the passenger side. Cricket nervously played with his thumbs between them.
"Oh what's with that look?" The she-devil asked pho-innocently. "Oh wait, is it, annoying when someone plays a song you've heard over and over?"
"Hey joke's on you I packed earplugs." Chip shot back with a triumphant grin as he screwed them in. "Who's annoying now?"
"Believe me it's still you." Gloria replied as her grin turned sour and the two had a stare down of sorts, that was until Nancy catapulted between them with her arm raised. Despite not being able to hear, Chip could tell jailbird was yelling, "Eyes on the road!"
Everyone yelped as Gloria just barely managed to hit the brakes in time. Traffic had just come to another annoying deadlock.
Turns out the Zillion Brax thing was mostly just to spite Chip.
What Gloria actually liked to listen to was book tapes.
Horror book tapes to be exact.
Cricket was very much jealous of Chip's earplugs as the blonde snored like a bird beside him. What definitely didn't help things was that the sun was going down.
"And then the severed hand of the teddy bear strangler raised itself from the ground and slowly crawled towards the sleeping child.."
"Crabble Dumpkins this is almost as bad as that time I watched one of your horror films from behind the kitchen door while you weren't looking."
"Wait, what was that?" Gloria asked, her raised brow coming off as much more menacing in the passing red and yellow car lights.
"Nothing!" Cricket looked back and forth for an escape as the music from the tape increased in volume. "I need to go to the bathroom!"
Mom's eyes widened at the outburst and Tilly even looked up from brushing Saxon's fibers. Gloria sighed, rolling her eyes as she pulled the Kludge over into the other lane. "Again? Okay, next exit I'll pull over."
"Thank you Gloria." Cricket said with the most gratefulness he could muster. Tilly leaned over the front seat to shake Chip's shoulder. "We're about to stop." She informed him as he hazily blinked awake in the passing street lights.
"But I swear if you buy another bucket gulp I'm tossing it out the window." Gloria threatened.
Cricket nodded, reaching over to hit the eject button on the truck's tape player. "And we might as well stop the tape for now, heh. In fact Gloria you're looking a little tired, mom you want to drive again!?"
"Uh…" Mom trailed off as she cracked her back. "Sure if you need me to Gloria…"
Gloria just shrugged.
"I guess we should fill up too." Gloria said, eyeing the gas as she drove the Kludge off the interstate to a nearby Sip n' Snak.
"Thanks for letting me get these sunglasses mom." Cricket said as they walked across the parking lot to the gas pumps. Mom smiled down at him as she took a sip of her Splishie.
"How could I say no? They're shaped like dinosaurs." T-rexes to be exact. Cricket quickly hopped into the Kludge's backseat as Mom opened the driver side door.
"I know right! They're-" Cricket cut himself off with a yelp as a bolt of lightning rippled across the sky, causing a round of thunder to soon follow.
"Ah! The Teddybear Strangler's after us!" Cricket yelled as he ducked beneath the seats. He could hear his mom chuckle.
"You talking about Gloria's tapes? Those were just stories,Cricket. No Teddybear Strangler is gonna get you with me around."
"R-really?" Cricket asked as he timidly peaked his head over the seats.
Mom nodded with a sigh as she leaned her elbow against the open truck window. "Yup. No Teddybear Strangler would dare go near my family-"
Another bolt of lightening just so happened to strike down at that exact moment, suddenly illuminating a figure just outside the door…a figure with big bear ears! Whilst the eerie sound of someone no doubt being strangled played in the background.
"AH! Teddybear strangler!" Cricket yelled with a wild finger point. Mom jerked, eyes wide in panic as she kicked the truck door open. It hit the TeddyBear Strangler right in the gut and made him double over in pain.
"What the-Guys it's me!" The figure wheezed.
Mom stopped with her fist raised in the air. Cricket hurriedly cranked the backseat window down and stuck his head out.
"Oh it's just Chip."
The former ceo raised his head with an annoyed glare, Tilly sympathetically patted Chip's back from atop his shoulders, the headband on her head drooping slightly, oh right Mom also let Tilly buy those. Man she was a cool mom!
"Not bad Nancy." Gloria complimented as she came up from behind and snagged shot gun.
"Oh gosh, I'm sorry y'all." Mom apologized before getting out to help Chip. The former ceo sighed as he stood up straight and took another sip of his bucket gulp (probably explained the 'strangling' noise.)
"No worries, still not as bad as the time you almost broke my arms." Chip wheezed sarcastically as he dramatically limped for the door and climbed into the backseat. Tilly climbed off his shoulders and slid in between him and Cricket.
Cricket sighed as he leaned against the window with a yawn.
"So, you glad we all decided to tag along?" Cricket decided to ask as Mom cranked the Kludge into drive.
Mom smiled at him from the rear view mirror. "Well I'm certainly glad I've got five awesome peeps to keep me awake while I drive."
Nancy wiped her tired brow as she drove. Everyone else had long since fallen asleep, leaving her the only awake passenger left in the vehicle.
It was pitch black out and they were still about four hours from Medium City.
"Well at least it's not-"
Just as Nancy was about to finish her sentence a single drop of rain hit the windshield and with it came a tsunami of rain the Amazon would be jealous of.
"Raining." Nancy sighed. She focused on humming to herself in order to stay awake. From the corner of her eye Nancy watched with a fond sigh as Gloria laid curled up against the passenger side door. What a kid, always running around, always busy. Nancy was so glad she wasn't young anymore.
"Just don't ever get too busy, alright." Nancy said aloud despite knowing Gloria couldn't hear her. "Also it was me who accidentally left the front door open that one time the bat flew in."
Phew, she'd been holding onto that guilt for months.
Nancy smiled as she looked back at her chicken nuggets in the back. Cricket, the 'sleep leech' had latched onto Tilly who in turn wrapped her arms around Chip's legs. Meanwhile the former ceo had taken up the majority of space in the backseat, laying himself almost completely flat.
Nancy's fingers curled as she looked back ahead at the road. She didn't know what Bill'd been thinking when he let that lunatic into their home-specially considering he was supposed to be the responsible one for crying out loud!-,but…in a way, she was glad.
It'd been getting kinda stale around the house anyway.
Well, about as stale as it could be with Alice anywhere nearby.
Nancy sighed again as she thought of the old woman. She hoped Alice wasn't stressing Bill out too much in Medium City. Lord knows he rarely needed help in that depart-
Nancy jumped at the sound of a car horn. Blort! She'd been drifting!
Once Nancy righted the Kludge and took a second to calm down, the biker hastily picked the nearest exit and rolled with it as she drove off the interstate.
"Okay, c'mon everyone up."
Chip moaned in annoyance, rubbing his sore neck as he rose. Cricket and Tilly finally awakened from their dogpile as he looked out the window.
"Uh, this isn't a motel?" Chip pointed out as Nancy nudged Gloria awake and hopped out of the passenger side.
"I know, it's a diner. We never ate dinner, and I almost fell asleep out 's been four hours. I think we all need a second to rejuvenate." Nancy explained.
"Diner?" Chip frowned as he swung his legs out and opened the door. It was raining cats and dogs. The former ceo fought the urge to whine as he let Tilly climb onto his shoulders and hold his blazer above them both so he could avoid getting his hair wet.
A large, obnoxious silver trailer greeted them from the otherside of an otherwise empty gravel lot. Chip fought the urge to turn back around as they dashed over. "Are they even still open?"
To his immense surprise they were. Must've gotten a lot of late night customers. How wonderful.
"Hi, I'm Christine and I'll be serving y'all tonight. What can I get started for you?"
By the sound of her accent they were starting to get into some real country territory now. Great.
"I'll have a cup of hot water and some ketchup packets." Tilly ordered. "Oh wait I see you let us have our own ketchup bottle, just the hot water then."
Christine frowned, but wrote it down anyway. "Oookay, and you ma'am?"
"Well I don't know about y'all ,but I could go for some pancakes."
Cricket's eyes widened in delight, he jumped up and down in the cramped booth much to everyone's mild annoyance. "Oooo yeah, me too, me too! Bring em on!"
Christine laughed as she jotted down the order. Gloria finally looked up as the waitress turned to her, coffee girl still hadn't shed the blanket from the truck. "Pie."
"Oh sure, what kin-"
"Surprise me Christine." Was all Gloria could offer as she planted her tired head back against the diner table.
"Just some coffee and avocado toast." Chip ordered, when Christine finally looked his way. The waitress frowned. "Uh we don't, really have avocado, we got grape and strawberry that's about it…"
Chip blinked. Oh right, he almost forgot this was the country. "Uh grape then, I guess."
Christine nodded with an exasperated sigh as she collected the menus none of them had looked at and walked back to the kitchen.
Cricket was already playing with the napkins, folding together a little triangle so he could play hand goalie with Nancy. Tilly was busy making friends with the lady bug that happened to land on their window seal.
"Why again are you wearing a suit and tie, on a road trip?" Gloria asked across the table, finally seeming to back to the world of the living some after Christine came back with everyone's food.
Chip shrugged, taking another bite of toast. "Uh duh, you never travel anywhere without looking your best."
Gloria did not seem to agree. "We've been on the road for seven hours now, there's no way that's comfortable."
"It's not about being comfortable." Chip shot back, seriously how could she not get this? "It's about being prepared."
"Prepared?" Nancy asked, cutting in.
"Uh yeah." Chip tore off the top of one of the diner's artificial sweetener packets. "If we somehow get stranded and I have to charm my way out of it, I'll need to be looking my best."
"What like if-"
"The Kludge's gone."
"Oh well I was gonna say if the Kludge ran out of gas,but that's not a bad example either Til-"
"No, the Kludge is gone." Tilly interrupted Cricket to point out the diner window. Her face frozen in barely tamed panic.
On the other side of the glass, a desolate gravel lot greeted them. Even with the darkness and the rain, the Kludge's absence was as plain as day.
Everyone's face went pale as they looked at each other.
"Oh…blort."