Awakening to the sound of blaring foghorns, Captain Scurvy pulled themselves into an upright position while their sleeping husband plugged his ears and turned away to try and retreat to the dream land he had been disrupted by. The blue cat was no stranger to early mornings, and generally the loud shipyard was hardly a notice for the experienced sailor. This morning however, the chilly winter morning was causing an unusual dread for the feline. Slowly pulling themselves out of bed, Scurvy ensured that they didn't wake their partner sleeping soundly. While the pair had only been reunited for about six months, the pair of lovers had a camaraderie that could only be built by two Toons who had been lovers and friends for years. Stretching, they reached to their nightstand and grabbed a black eyepatch, and with no effort slowly slid the accessory over their eye. Shivering their timbers, the cat walked over and noticed the cause of the sleep disruption; the window was open. Shoving the porthole closed, Scurvy took the chance to gaze outside onto the water. After they and Melville had married, they had decided to live where they felt most comfortable, on Scurvy's ship. It was somehow larger and more homely than the little shack the blue pirate had occupied for the better part of three decades, although there were the small issues that reared their ugly heads occasionally. Knowing they wouldn't be able to fall back asleep now, the sailor excited the bedroom and up onto the deck. Donald's Dock was once again devoured in a thick, white fog. Even the largest watercrafts were but a blurry vision for anybody trying to navigate, and unfortunately for many the lighthouse was not in operation due to technical issues. While most would likely complain about the weather, the loud sounds of Toons working and boats sailing, and the constant motion of the ship was the waves repeatedly battered the wood, Scurvy found nothing but peace about their new home. Strolling barefoot across the damp, chilly wood, Captain wandered over to the kitchen, ready to stir up a delicious cup of coffee. Scurvy hadn't been much for the drink previously, but after a coffee date with Melville and Horsenado, they had soon become addicted when they discovered Starboards.
As they went through the morning routine, the retiree was caught on a feeling that seemed to encompass them at least once per day, the pure, unadulterated freedom and happiness that came with no responsibilities and no stress. The dark blue cat could never have imagined retiring, especially not at their age, after all seventy-two wasn't that old, but the feline had been through more wear and tear than somebody twice their age. Now that they finally had a chance to be with the love of their life, they were going to enjoy it. With their steaming beverage, Scurvy sat down on the stool in front of the small box TV that they had been given as a wedding gift by John B. The cat wasn't sure how they lived without it for so long, but like the coffee, it had become a vital part of their morning routine. "Arrrgh, time to see what be happenin' in Toontown."
Flipping on the morning news, Scurvy leaned back and took a sip of their drink. Coming back from a commercial break, the familiar Rhea Porter was onscreen discussing an ongoing story. "We're back with our continuing coverage on the disappearance of the commercial Toontanic "Ship-Shop-Shape." When we last reported this story last week, we had been told that a search and rescue had been instigated to begin in the search of any signs of the missing Toons. Today we have an update, and it isn't a good one. Communication with the rescue crew, led by Captain Ahab, owner of Ahab's Prefab Sea Crab Center, has been lost for forty-eight hours. The last known correspondence was an update from navigator and noted author Calypso Denver of an oncoming storm near the "unknown line." For those of you unfamiliar, the "unknown line" is the furthest point south of Toontown with any recorded cartography. It has become notorious in the last several weeks with daring Toons wanting to be the first to overcome this massive barrier. Ironically, much of this is driven by the popularity of the novel by said Calypso Denver. We are still waiting on an update from Toon HQ, and we will be the first to report once we have heard about the unfortunate fleet."
Scurvy felt their stomach swelling with anxiety from the second they heard the name Calypso. While the Captain was aware that their friend had been part of the rescue crew, they had never considered the possibility of things going wrong. "Ain't what a Toon wants ta be hearin' in the mornin', aye." Scurvy rubbed their forehead with the palm of their hand. Grabbing the coffee mug in their other paw, the sailor hurry-walked back outside, across the deck, and back to the bedroom where Melville had been snoring soundly. Gently placing the cup down on the nightstand, Scurvy sat down on the bed and used both hands to shake their husband awake. "Mel, aye, Mel. Wake up please."
"Ughhh. Come on hon, can't you give me five more minutes? I was up late last night getting the shop ready for Halloween." The brown horse pulled the blanket over his head, trying to ignore the calls from Scurvy.
"Mel, I need ya up now. This be important." The usually unshakeable septoonagenarian was swaying like a rubber ducky on the open sea. "Tis about Calypso."
The mention of the pair's pal was enough to stir Melville into an upright position with a fluster of adrenaline. "Woah, Calypso? What's going on, is everything okay?" At his age, the horse was more used to sudden news being a bad sign than anything else.
Scurvy took a seat on the edge of the bed and reached their hand up to stroke the horse's head, helping to calm him down with gentle scratches. "Sorry, didn't mean to get yer in such a flurry." Rubbing their neck, Scurvy sighed. "Well, it may be nothin', but I was just watchin' the news and they mentioned that the ship Calypso be navigatin' twas reported missing for two days now. They went the same way as all those other ships that've been up and disappearin'." The blue cat was trembling in fear and anxiety about the fate of their friend. While they had complete confidence in the crew of Ahab's ship, the feline knew full well how badly things could go on the open waters, let alone untreaded waters. "What'n if somethin' happened to them, Mel? We gotta do somethin'!"
"Hold on a second sweetie. Let's just calm down and think about things. Calypso's ship is out in unchartered waters. Its possible they may not have the capability to radio in their positions. It wouldn't be that unusual for a technological issue to happen and knock out their radios or a million other things. I know that ships have gone missing there, but they have an all-star crew, and it has been two days. I don't think you should be worrying your old heart too much yet."
"Hey, look who's talkin', yer furs getting grayer than the the hilt on me aoogah sword." Chuckling and feeling a bit of relief from Melville's logic, Captain let themselves breathe easy for a moment. "Not gonna say it won't be in the back of me mind now though. Lot of ships been going missin' down there. Feel like I am responsible a bit fer them not bein' found. I should've been captainin' that ship."
Melville knew exactly what Scurvy was referring to. Before Mayor Banana had gone to Ahab for help, they had approached Scurvy and requested they captain the ship to go searching. However, Scurvy had recently retired, and had no intention of changing that, as much as it pained them to say no. The guilt had nibbled at them randomly, but now it was in full force as the cat felt truly responsible for whatever happened. Maybe it was overconfidence in their own abilities, but it couldn't be helped by the experienced Captain. "Scurvy, the only thing you did wrong was becoming so famous. You've done more for Toontown, and for Toons in general, than just about anyone else. You've proven yourself. You deserve a break now." Grabbing his partner's ungloved paw, Melville had a rare look of true seriousness on his face. The compassionate and caring horse knew it likely wouldn't be enough to convince the sailor of their innocence, however even a small comfort would be a win. "Anyways, why don't we get our mind of things for now. Ain't going to do us any good just sitting around worrying. I was thinking maybe we could get together with some friends today for lunch. How's that sound?"
Smirking with a somewhat forced grin, Scurvy nodded and hugged their husband. "Alright, hon. You be knowin' better than me when I get in me own head. I'm going to go ahead and get ready. I'll send a message out to everyone n' let em know what's goin' on."
Horsenado reached his hands into the large bag of flour that was set aside the large marble counter. Adorned in his favorite chef's hat, the red horse was preparing for another busy day. The pizza connoisseur had used the proceeds from royalties from the Quentin Tarintoono movie to open his own pizzeria. The feedback and happy faces he had received from his cooking amongst his friends and Big Monkey's crew had been the only motivation the thick stallion needed to pursue his secret dream. Everything had been a whirlwind – a Horsenado of sorts, since returning to Toontown. Today was going to be a very special day. Horsenado had met a cute steed named Cotton Candy Cutie and had invited him over for a personal dining opportunity. The restaurant would be closed to the public, and if the horse was lucky, there would be more sausage in his mouth than just the pizza. As he covered the counter in the white substance, he felt a rumbling from in his pocket. Quickly dusting his hands off, Horsenado gleamed with excitement expecting an update from the other stallion. Much to his surprise however, the notification was from a different blue Toon, his old friend Captain Scurvy. "Hey matey, long time no see, and it ain't just my one bad eye, harr harr. Anyway, was wondering if you had time ta meet today fer lunch, I am getting' the crew together and it wouldn't be the same without you. Let me know if you be comin'."
The short, fat Toon was conflicted. After all, he had a hot date today, but on the other hoof, he hadn't seen Scurvy in a while. Thinking about it for a moment, the intelligent horse felt a lightning bulb pop over his head. Grabbing his messenger, he began typing frantically to his older pal. "Aye-aye Captain! It has been too long! I'm sorry I've been so busy lately running the restaurant. I would absolutely love to get together for lunch. I actually have a date today with a cute horse I met in Cashbot HQ though. If it wouldn't be too weird, would you all be interested in coming by the shop for lunch? I can make us pizza and you all can meet my new boyfriend (hopefully.) Would that be, okay? If not, I'm sure I can work out something!" Placing the device back into his pocket, the mustang continued prepping his pizza. Quickly realizing that if multiple Toons would be coming, he would need to make several pies.
Running over to grab more ingredients, Horsenado felt a rumbling in his pocket once again. Shuffling around with his free hand as he stretched out to grab some yeast, he managed to pull the screen out just enough to read the message from the corner of his eye. "Ay, look at you matey. Don't mean to intrude on your quest for booty if yer know what I mean. T'aint too much of an issue if you want to wait er anything, if not though I'm sure everyone'd love ta meet him. Talk to you soon matey!"
"Goodness, Scurvy." Horsenado blushed at the joke from his former Captain. Fortunately for him he was already red-faced, so it wouldn't show. Hurrying back to his counter, the steed hummed an upbeat, pizza-making song that his mother used to sing when he was just a foal. Shortly after he had began rolling the dough for his second pizza, his device began to vibrate. Horsenado preferred his whisperer to be on vibrate as he enjoyed the feeling in his back pocket. Sighing exasperatedly as he tried to focus on the task on hand, he pulled out the messenger. "Gosh, can't you all see I'm busy? I don't have time for this." When the stallion opened the whisper, he nearly dropped the pre-made pie to the floor
"Hey, Horsenado! It's Cotton Candy Cutie. Just wanted to let you know I'll be there in about thirty minutes. That is if you're still on for today! I'm really excited to see you! Let me know!" More flustered, Horsenado realized he was in quite the conundrum. He was going to have seven other Toons coming for lunch and little precious time in order to prepare. Jumping into action, he knew that he was going to need to bake like he'd never baked before…
Mariner covered his chilled snout with his hands and breathed into the warm gloves, hoping that it would have some kind of effect in warming himself. The blue dog had usually made his home in Silly World since his return to Toontown which normally had a warm, sunny climate year-round. The hound hadn't really prepared for the much harsher cold that Donald's Dock offered in the late Autumn, especially with freezing winds coming off of the water. The dog waited on a bench near Seaweed Street. He had received a message from Captain Scurvy that the group would be meeting here and then walking to Horsenado's Pizzeria all together. The Toon hadn't seen his friends in a while, aside from Edmund who had lived with Mariner for a few months before moving into his own custom-built estate. The entire crew had reacted much differently to becoming rich and famous following Calypso's novel, and the following movie. While it didn't seem to have a negative impact on anybody, it certainly provided all of the Toons an opportunity to pursue their dreams which left little time for small things like meeting for lunch. "Hey, Mariner! You're looking a bit blue. Must be cold, eh?"
The dark-blue canine looked up and was face to face with an older, green crocodile. The toothy grin was unmistakable. "John! Aren't you a sight for sore eyes? I feel like I should be more worried about you, being cold-blooded and what not!" Standing up, the old friends hugged and resumed their place on the bench. The reptile was bundled up like a Christmas present in several layers of coats, scarves, and mittens. "Have you seen anybody else?"
"Oh, so I guess you two are just going to ignore me? Typical!" A shrill, mocking voice called out from a few yards away, easily catching notice.
"Ah, Cross! Just figured you'd be asleep somewhere or shirking some duties or something." John joked, retreating behind his jacket and elbowing Mariner. "He said it!"
Mariner turned his head back and forth. "Wait, what did I do! No, he said it!" The trio started laughing, all glad to be back together. "So, looks like we're just waiting for Calypso, Scurvy, Mel, and Edmund." Checking his whisper device, the dog scowled. "Listen, I'm freezing out here. Do you think we could head inside somewhere or something?"
"Calypso? I thought he was off on that search and rescue mission? Did he come back already? I hadn't heard anything." The yellow mouse tugged her ear. "I guess it'd make sense to celebrate him returning with some yummy food!"
"Hmm. I haven't heard anything 'bout it. Haven't heard from him at all since we waved him off a few weeks ago. You were there too, weren't ya Mariner? You must be losing your memory in this cold." The crocodile added, taking off one of his jackets and tossing it on Mariner's back. "Anyways, I agree with you. We could hang out in the gag shop."
As the Toons spoke, a large ship could be seen skimming across Donald's Dock through the fog. Blasting a loud foghorn, Captain Scurvy and Mel reached their arms outside of the window and waved at their friends. "Arrrgh, full speed ahead Mel! I be seein' a gaggle of friends ready fer a delicious lunch waitin' on us!"
Melville peered and frowned. "Still looks empty without Calypso there. Also, looks like Edmund isn't there either. I'm gonna pull into the dock and rest the ship. Why don't you go say hi to everyone!" Once mounted and tied to the docks, Scurvy safely leapt down from the medium-sized ship and hurried over to greet the excited Toons. Melville, older than the rest, slowly caught up with his spouse. "Morning everyone! Trust everyone is staying warm out?"
"Um yeah. Totally doing great, Mel!" Cross let out through chattering teeth, rubbing her arms together. "Can we get going? I don't think its fair that Horsenado gets to sit inside, all warm and stuffing his face with delicious food! Let's roll!"
"Hold on a second. Wait about Edmund? I haven't heard back from him. Is he coming?" Mariner inquired. It was unusual for the brown dog not to respond, let alone not to his best friend. "Scurvy, any updates?"
The blue cat whipped out their whisper device and shrugged. "Argh, not a thing back mateys. Just assumed he'd see it and be here. Anyone want to try givin' him a call?"
Everybody looked to each other concerned, before John volunteered. "I'll give him a ring. Why don't we start heading off to Horsenado's though? I'm getting pretty hungry, and I think if we don't get inside soon, Mariner and Cross are gonna turn into popsicles. Shall we go?" For the first time in too long, the crew was (mostly) back together, with a camaraderie that transcended any time or distance away from each other.
"Alright everybody. If you could put together your combined five brain cells long enough to get this scene together, we can all go home for the night. Does everybody understand?" A black cat with a green baseball cap stood around a small semi-circle of Toons yelling through a megaphone. Once he felt that he was heard, he waved his hand and sent everybody back into their positions. "Making a movie shouldn't be this hard." Walking behind the camera, along with the camera Toon, Quentin sighed and rolled his eyes. "Okay, in 3…2…1… Action!"
With the clack of the of clapperboard, the action began to unfold. A purple dog in a Ranger's uniform and a tall yellow rabbit wearing a dunce cap began to chase after another Toon, a dark green cat who appeared to have just robbed a gag shop. "It looks like he's going to try and cut through the pond! I'm going to try and cut him off on the other side! You follow him!" The purple dog yelled out to the rabbit.
Nodding, the bunny ran with an absurdly wacky over exaggeration, comically trying to keep himself from tumbling over from the momentum of his swinging steps. "Durr, okay boss! I got you!" As the uncoordinated Toon stumbled after the villain, he began to lose his balance and once the pair entered the water, the rabbit went flying face-forward into the water idiotically and getting drenched. As soon as Quentin was about to step in to cut the scene, something unexpected happened. An overhead light came crashing down and landing in the water near the rabbit, almost crushing their head. "Good cog!" The actor called out, rolling out of the way and inadvertently ending the scene.
"Cut, cut!" Quentin shouted out, fuming red. "Damn it, lighting! That's the second time this week that you idiots have allowed this to happen! Get down here and replace it, you just ruined the scene!" Pulling off his cap, the feline threw the unlucky hat onto the ground and began stomping it into the cold concrete floor. "Whoever allowed that to happen is fired, their children are fired, and their grandchildren are fired!" While Tarintoono was usually angry, today he was livid. Constant interruptions had delayed his film for several days already since production began, usually in mysterious or unusual ways. The black cat had done something beyond his usual scope of work – an action comedy. The director was usually well known for his intricate narratives, deep and varied characters, and emotional beats. However, at the request of his wife Crayon who adored comedies, decided to try doing something different. The movie was a typical buddy-comedy with all of the cliches it entailed. It starred Boxer Garfunkel as Ranger Pretzellooper who was paired with an idiotic new Ranger on the force named Anti-Intelligence. An incompetent and mistake prone rabbit. He had based the character on his former enemy who had perished several years prior, but who still held a flaming ire towards. "Boxer, get over here for a moment."
"What's going on, Quentin?" Boxer rushed over and pulled off his Ranger hat. "Do you want to run the shot again?"
The black cat inhaled slowly, trying to calm himself using the techniques he had been learning in therapy. "Yeah, we'll need to re-do the entire shot now. Wouldn't be very funny if we don't see Anti stumble all the way through the water. This time though, when you are giving your command, I want you to have a bit more frustration in your voice. Anti here is a complete idiot, he has caused you more frustration than you can imagine, and the Rangers won't give you a new partner. Really drive that home. We want the audience to enjoy him falling over like a fool. Otherwise, they may feel a bit of empathy for some reason. Got it?"
Boxer nodded. At this point in his career, the young actor had worked with Quentin on three movies and had a good understanding that he wasn't to disagree with the director when he was in this mood. The crew was exhausted enough as it was after trying to get through one scene all day and all of the ensuing mishaps that continued to plague and interrupt filming. Going back into place, they waited for the rabbit to come back into the frame and inhaled.
"I'm getting drenched with these repeated takes mate. Really hoping this'll be the final shot. I could use me a drink." The bunny whose name was Aussie was actually from The Island, a whole world of Toons who had been unknown to Toontown for centuries. Boxer quite enjoyed the rabbit's unusual accent and felt that it added a lot to the comedic purpose. Plus, as a former stand-up comedian, the dog felt much more comfortable in this world than he had playing teen-romances in which he had made his original starring role.
"You two can talk once the camera is rolling. Is everybody in place? I want to go home and see my wife! Let's get this rolling! Alright, on my cue! 3…2…1… Action!"
The scene unfolded much the same way, with the pair of Rangers chasing after the generic looking villain. Boxer had taken the comments from Quentin and ensured a passionate frustration at his direction to Anti-Intelligence, ad-libbing a bit. "You follow him, and don't screw up this time! I want to get home to my family!"
Aussie once again plummeted forward into the water comically, sliding across the pond and getting a face full of mud. Pulling himself up, he looked up and scowled. "Aw dang it Pretzel, I done screwed up! Can't see a ding-dang thing through all this mud!"
"Wash it off, dude! You're in water!" Pretzel, played by Boxer, had to improvise and continued to give chase through the Slapstick Villa playground. Unfortunately for the dog, while he was "chasing" the other actor, he didn't notice another rabbit had entered the scene and threw what appeared to be a cream pie, slopping him in the face before dashing off into nowhere. The pie though wasn't any ordinary pie; the filling smelled terrible. Rotten mayonnaise? Boxer wasn't really sure what it was, but he dropped down and began scraping off the disgusting mixture.
"Why don't you wash it off, loser!" An unfamiliar voice called out, echoing in the studio before fading away and leaving a mystified crew left to help run over and clean up, cutting off production once again.
Nobody was quite sure what was happening. Who was that rabbit, and why did they attack Boxer with a pie? What would Quentin do? The cat was prone to explosions, and after the day that had passed, and everything that had just happened, expected a full-on explosion. Everybody looked to Quentin who sat in his director's chair, unspeaking and unblinking. Once Aussie and Boxer had been cleaned up, they walked over with some of the other crew unafraid to be near the black cat. "Um, Quentin. Was that part of the shot?"
The cat looked like he had just seen a ghost. When the other Toons spoke to him, it had broken through to him and awoke him to what had happened. "Um, er no. No. Sorry, I'm not really sure what that was." Everybody was caught off guard. Did Quentin apologize? "We got enough to work with. We can edit everything later. Why don't we call it a day, everybody clean up and you can go home?"
"Wait, is this a trick? I'm a little confused." Horace, the camera operator inquired. That rabbit just ruined the shot. We could run it one more time. Maybe we can just film Boxer's part after Aussie trips?"
"No, that's okay. We'll get it tomorrow. Everybody just go home. We'll get this finished up tomorrow." Standing up, Quentin grabbed his hat and shook it around, unflattening it and resting it on his head. Without another word, the feline walked out of the studio, plopped a teleportation hole down, and headed home.
Arriving back at his multi-level estate, Quentin walked inside and was blasted by the overwhelming smell of Mac-and-cheese. A slightly shorter black cat wearing a purple apron jogged out from the kitchen into the living room and gleamed. "Hey sweetie! You're home early! I was just making dinner! Why don't you get washed up and come sit down and I'll get you a drink!"
The pair of black cats had been married for sixteen years. Crayon knew better than anybody when something was off. Quentin loved macaroni and cheese, and his general lack of excitement or anything was an immediate cause for concern. "Alright, I'll be right there."
"What's wrong cutie-pie?" Crayon walked over and gently rubbed her husband's back, eliciting a light purr from the grumpy cat. "Bad day at work?"
"Well, you can say that. But what else is new? No, I saw something Crayon. Anti… I think he's back."
The shorter cat raised an eyebrow in disbelief and confusion. "Er, honey. What are you talking about? Are you talking about the actor for the movie? Isn't he playing an Anti clone?"
Quentin shook his head and pinched the bridge of his nose. "No, Crayon. This was Anti. I swear it was him. It was a long-legged yellow rabbit with purple legs. He even had the same looking dumb head and outfit. It had to be him. He even burst onto the set and attacked one of the actors with a rotten cream pie. You tell me, who else could that be?'
"Wait, a rotten cream pie? A tall rabbit?" Even Crayon was beginning to feel a bit unsettled by everything. "How is that possible though? Anti died several years ago. We've seen his grave. Maybe it was just a troll who got onto set and is messing with you? After all, anyone with an idea of the movie could probably get a temporary re-write and do something like that."
"This was too coincidental though, honey. He was an exact replica. Besides. Who would also know about the rotten cream pies? This has to be him. He's back, and he's going to try and ruin my movie! Well, I'm not going to let him!" Quentin stomped his foot and crossed his arms. "He was always jealous of my money and success; doesn't surprise me he would fake his own death as some kind of prank or something. I'm going to hire more security and if I catch him again I'm going to… Well, I don't know but I'm going to do something!" The cat began to seem a bit more delirious to his wife who was skeptical but wanted to be supportive.
Crayon sat down on the couch and took Quentin's hand. "How about this sweetie. Tonight, we enjoy a delicious dinner. We sit down and watch some TV, we take a nice warm bath, and I'll rub your feet just the way you like them, okay?" Planting a kiss on her husband's cheek, Crayon could see some of the happy glow returning to Quentin. "Then tomorrow, we'll go on down to the graveyard and we'll go find Anti's grave. Then we'll hit it with some rotten cream pies! I can get some stuff while you're at work and have them ready to go. How does that sound, babe?"
Overwhelmed by joy at his luck in meeting the perfect partner, Quentin embraced his wife and kissed her on the cheek. "That sounds perfect sweetie. I love you." Standing up the pair wandered into the kitchen, hoping to forget about the awful day.
