Chapter 4
Bella's POV
Not once since the day he left me, did I think I ever come face to face with the father of my daughter again. However much to my shock and surprise there he was sitting across the street in his silver volvo, and his face showed the same shocked and disbelief as mine did. Just the thought of the Cullen family brought a mixture of emotions ranging from pure happiness to anger. I quickly went back into the house and pressed my back against the door and eyes closed, hoping against all the odds it was just my imagination. There's no way this could be happening, this had to be some cruel trick my mind was playing on me, Edward Cullen was not outside my house. As soon as I composed myself, I turned around to reopen the door to check to see if he was gone. Instead of being across the street, this time he was on my front porch face to face with me.
"Bella your really here" he breathed in such disbelief, but also happy at the same time.
"T-This can't be real" I said more to myself, not wanting to believe that The Cullen family was actually here. Then realization hit me, Renesmee must of met not only him, but the rest of the Cullen family during school today, that would explain why she seems so exhausted.
Edward all of a sudden took a step forward towards me, which caused me to take a step back. Does he honestly believe that I would let him that close to me, after everything he has put me through.
"Do you think we can talk privatley Bella" he asked more in a pleading tone than a demanding one surprisingly.
The last time we talked "Privatley" it ended in disaster for me, so of course I was extremley hesitant to talk to him. However both Edward and Renesmee just discovered each other's existence, and I did not want to be the reason that Renesmee lost any chance at a possible relationship with her father or his family.
So against my better judgement I sighed and said "There's some wood behind my house we can talk privatley there, follow me"
I knew better that just because Renesmee can sleep, she'll be able to pick up any noise a mile away in her sleep
It remained silent between Edward and I, even when we were far away enough from the house. How on earth do you possible start such a conversation such as this one, especially given the circumstances between us.
"So did you know about Renesmee" I asked finally breaking the silence between us.
"No not at first, it wasn't until Alice replayed the conversation she had with her that included a memory of you in it, that I figured it out. I didn't believe such a thing was possible, but the resembelence between us and her unique scent is very difficult to ignore" Edward explained.
"Alice" I said in a annoyed tone, of course it just had to have been her that Edward would find out the truth from. I didn't doubt that the little meddling pixie probably replayed her conversation with Renesmee purposely for Edward to hear.
"Please Bella tell me what happened to you after I left" he said obviously referring to my pregnancy and my transformation into a vampire.
"Well isn't it obivous, we had sex before my birthday party that caused me to get pregnant and I gave birth after you left" I explained briefly while not attempting hide my saracastic tone.
"You know what I mean Bella, I want to know exactly went down with your pregnancy and what lead to your change" Edward asked this time more demanding.
There's no way in hell I wanted to talk to him about all of that here and now, I just wasn't ready to explain to him all that I went through just to ensure Renesmee and I would live.
"BELLA" Jake called out from the distance.
Edward and I turned around and saw Jake running towards where we are. The moment Jake saw Edward, his face turned to one of anger.
"What the hell is he doing here" he asked angrily looking like he was about to attack.
"Jake stop" I warned as I put my hand on his shoulders trying to stop a fight from breaking out.
"Your associating with werewolves Bella" Edward asked shocked and he didn't attempt to hide the pain on his face.
"Who I associate with, is none of your concern Edward" I said sternly as I stood betwen the two of them.
"Their extremley dangerous, once they lose control they can easily kill you" he said like I was some kind of idiot.
Jake scoffed and said "That's rich coming from the guy, who left his girlfriend to deal with a deadly pregnancy by herself."
All of a sudden Edward's face twisted in agonzing pain and then fell onto his knees. One look at Jacob, who was smirking, was enough to tell me what was happening.
"JACOB STOP" I screamd at him. As much as I was angry at Edward for everything that has happened , this wasn't how I wanted him to know what happened.
"He wants to know so bad Bella let him, you know he deserves it" Jacob said still keeping his stare on Edward.
"Please Jake stop, Renesmee would not want you to hurt him like this" I said, really hating to bring Renesmee into it.
Jacob reluctantly took his gaze off of Edward, and looked at me with such a mixed range of emotions that I understood too well.
"Are you seriously going to let him into Nessie's life" he asked looking at me like I was crazy.
I couldn't help but glance at Edward, still on his knees breathing heavily, trying to comphrend the images that Jacob must of shown him.
I looked back at Jacob and said "That's up to Renesmee, Jacob. We can't force that kind of decision on her, despite what you and I may feel about it. She's smart enough to know what she's getting into and does not need our influence in her decision."
Jacob just gave me a look, before he huffed and walked away back to our house, which left Edward and me alone once again.
When I looked back at Edward, he was already back on his feet, but his face held so much pain and sorow. Despite my anger, I couldn't help but feel sorry for him. I mean after all he did just find out that he was a father, something that he probably never thought was possible, and I could only imagine the images Jacob showed him.
"Bella I'm so sorry for everything, had I known-" Edward started to say, before I interrupted him.
"Lets not do this here Edward, lets just keep the focus on Renesmee. Besides Alice does any of the others know about her" I asked.
"No, but they suspect something for sure" he said.
I sighed and said "Then you need to inform them of Renesmee so that way they're not sidetrack by the news later. I know this whole thing is still so new to you, but I hope that you would want to get to know Renesmee better now that you know the truth."
"Of course I do, it's just still going to be so awkard due to the fact that I have no experience in being a father. When I do get to know her, am I going to have those parental concerns or will it be nohting more than like a sibling or friend" he said with what I could tell real sincerity in his voice.
"Edward it's going to be a process, but right now just focus on getting to know Renesmee. Introduce her to your family, because I know Alice will be dying to meet her." I said knowing I was doing the right thing
"I'm surprised at how calm you are Bella. I thought you would have had my head by now" he said looking and sounding really confused.
"I'm doing this for Renesmee because for the past 9 years the only family she's ever known has been me and Jacob and that hasn't been fair to her at all. Everytime she asks about you, I always find someway to change the subject, like the coward that I am because I didn't want to explain how her daddy left me in the middle of the woods promising that I would never see you agian. Whether I like it or not, your here now and I have to accept that, at least for Renesmee's sake. " I explained trying to keep my emotions all in check.
Edward's POV
As Bella talked, I couldn't help but remember the images that Jacob showed me. Bella's huge stomach and how frail she looked while drinking blood to keep both her and the baby nourished. Then Bella screaming, as a unrecongizable vampire bites into her stomach and then her trashing about as she is changing into a vampire. I left her to protect her from my world, but all I did was put her in even more danger. Then there was the issue of Renesmee, the daughter I left behind 9 years ago. If It wasn't for that disastorous birthday party, then I would have been there for both of them all this time. Why the hell didn't I listen to Bella when she kept insisting she didn't want a party, this situation could have been avoided.
"Edward are you ok" Bella asked noticing how out of it I must of been.
"Bella will please let me explain myself" I asked hoping she would listen to me because she needed to know the truth.
"What is there to explain Edward. You made yourself clear 9 years ago" she said trying to hide the pain in her voice. The pain that I caused and wish that I could take away.
"You don't understand Bella, I lied to you all those years ago. I wanted to protect you from my world after Jasper's attack on your birthday. That's why I said all those horrible things, I would take it all back if I could" I explained hoping that against all the odds that she would believe me.
However she just looked at me, more than likely trying to comphrend what I just revealed to her. Minutes went by and she still hadn't said anything, which was making me more and more nervous.
"You honestly expect me to believe that you lied" she finally asked, but this time starting to sound angry.
"All I wanted to do was to protect you" I said desperatley.
Bella put her hands on her head in exasperation and said in a angry like voice "Well that certaintley worked out didn't it. Let me tell you something Edward, you leaving didn't do nothing to protect me in fact your leaving made everything worse. You left me pregnant wtih a hybrid baby, and can you imagine that for my whole month of my pregnancy everytime she kicked me one of my ribs or other bones would break because of her sheer strength or when I went into labor and my spine broke in two. Then there's the fact that not only was I a newborn vampire, but also a new mother having to adjust to her daughter's rapid growth."
"I'm sorry" was all that I could manage to say.
"I'm done Edward, I don't want to hear no more. All I want from you is to just be there for Renesmee, and I will not get in your way. It will be like I don't even exist" she said.
If I was human, my heart would have dropped and stopped beating all together. Oh the irony of those words, the examt same one ones that I used on her, were now being used against me. I wasn't sure if pain of leaving her could ever compare to the pain of Bella's rejection just now. I just kept my eyes focused on the ground, I don't think I could bear it to look at her in the face.
When I did look back up, I hadn't notice that Bella had left and leaving me all alone in the forest. However I did hear the footsteps of Alice approaching me.
"Edward?" Alice questioned to see how I was.
"She wants nothing to do with me Alice" I said, almost hoping that I could cry.
"She's angry Edward, and has every right to be. Did you honestly expect her to open her arms right up to you. She needs time to heal" Alice rubbing my back in an attempt to comfort me.
"I don't know how to make it right to both of them. I left her pregnant and left Renesmee without a father in her life" I said feeling completley defeated.
"It's going to take time to win Bella over, so right now just focus on getting to know your daughter. She's eager to get to know you, as much as you are with her" Alice said giving me a smile.
"I suppose your right" I said with a slight chuckle.
Alice tugged on my arm and said "Now it's time to go home, you have a special announcement to make to the family."
"I suppose I do" I said with a smile, just imaging my family's reactions once I tell them about both Renesmee and Bella.
When we arrived at our newly furnished home, thanks to Esme's superior designs, everyone else was already waiting in the family room waiting for Alice and me. Alice automatically went to Jasper's side, while I stood where I was wondering how I should explain it to them.
"Edward what is this I hear about a human girl" Carlisle asked both intrigued and slightly suspicious about what's he's heard from the others.
"I've made a terrible mistake" I said as I relayed the enitre day's events with the family.
Author's Note
Well there's chapter 4 and I hoped you all enjoyed it. I would have had it up sooner, but my computer crashed in the middle of saving it, so I had to rewrite it all from scratch. It's not my best chapter, but I feel I did fine. Next chapter we'll see Renesmee and Edward starting to get to know one another, and interacting with the other Cullen kids. So please let me know what you think and continue to read and review.
